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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My dad was a taxi driver many years ago and if a customer asked if they could smoke he'd reply 'You can burst into fecking flames for all I care...' 
Peach x |
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""You couldn't empty water from a boot if the instructions were on the heel""
I like that one.
I remember my dad chastising the lazy teenager that I was with.
“I’ve seen more go in a soluble aspirin.” |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not exactly a quote,more of a statement I heard when a lass in a pub was pissed oF by a guys advances.
If your dicks so big why don't you bend over backwards and go fuck yourself!! |
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My dad always used to say we "hadn't got the brains of a gnat" 
Others I like include:
If this was a stick of rock it'd have 'disaster' written right through it
(Immediately after some thing's gone wrong) What did you learn? |
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Conversation between my Dad and my lad ....
Dad - if you’re head wasn’t screwed on you’d lose it
Lad - well I wouldn’t be looking for it as I’d be dead and your room covered in blood
Then he ran ! |
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I'm taking notes so I can traumatise my daughter in the future 
