FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I've been spotted
I've been spotted
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh. |
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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago
Merseyside |
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh. "
have they identified themselves to you? |
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh. "
Oh no that’s crap 
We all risk it once a profile pic is seen.
Hopefully it was a nice message? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you? "
No. Fairly anon profile |
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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago
Bristol East |
Happened to me a few years ago.
My profile pic was taken on a street in Glasgow on a quiet day, underwear showing below a big coat.
Someone began circulating the photo via the email.
Soon, I had been doing a striptease at a swingers club in Glasgow.
A friend came and told me.
And showed me a link to a sensible pic on a website I had completely forgotten about.
To be honest, I found the whole thing quite liberating.
"The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about"
- Oscar Wilde
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Happened to me a few years ago.
My profile pic was taken on a street in Glasgow on a quiet day, underwear showing below a big coat.
Someone began circulating the photo via the email.
Soon, I had been doing a striptease at a swingers club in Glasgow.
A friend came and told me.
And showed me a link to a sensible pic on a website I had completely forgotten about.
To be honest, I found the whole thing quite liberating.
"The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about"
- Oscar Wilde
"
He was a smart bugger Oscar Wilde... |
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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago
Merseyside |
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile "
then they are being weird. block them and move on.... i dont mind anyone contacting me if they recognise me but ONLY if they reveal themselves. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Profile Not Available
This member has hidden their profile.
Don’t be scared you may meet someone nice "
I hid my profile straight away. I'll prob bring it back soon Enough |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile
then they are being weird. block them and move on.... i dont mind anyone contacting me if they recognise me but ONLY if they reveal themselves. "
Yeah that's the bit that bothers me. Block it is...
 |
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Not an idiot but it isn't something we would do and you do have a distinctive look. Having said that people have varying levels of discretion and some think it's ok for them to be on here but everyone else is a pervert. Messaging saying they know you but not identifying themselves is low.
People have messaged us claiming to know us or to have seen us out and told us what cars we drive... they've all been wrong.
It's a crap thing to do to someone though |
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile "
That will just play on your mind as you become a detective trying to solve the case.
To avoid it happening again, Do a search & block people who are too close.
They are the ones who are hiding, So its unlikely that they will tell anyone as it will lead to you discovering their identity. |
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"I've been spotted loads I just block  "
Blocking is a bit like having ostrich mentality.
They can still read everything you say and if they wanted to they could use a different profile to look more closely. |
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh. "
They identified you at work ? Or they identified you here and messaged you , saying they work where you work ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile
That will just play on your mind as you become a detective trying to solve the case.
To avoid it happening again, Do a search & block people who are too close.
They are the ones who are hiding, So its unlikely that they will tell anyone as it will lead to you discovering their identity. "
Ooh what's this now? Interesting. I probably wouldn't use that feature cause on the plus side I've met some really lovely local people on fab.
Thanks tho... |
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile "
So how do you know they legitimately know you and where you work ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
They identified you at work ? Or they identified you here and messaged you , saying they work where you work ?"
Messaged me having seen me at work last night |
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile
That will just play on your mind as you become a detective trying to solve the case.
To avoid it happening again, Do a search & block people who are too close.
They are the ones who are hiding, So its unlikely that they will tell anyone as it will lead to you discovering their identity.
Ooh what's this now? Interesting. I probably wouldn't use that feature cause on the plus side I've met some really lovely local people on fab.
Thanks tho... "
If you search and block people who are close you are going to have to some long journeys for meets. |
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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago
Merseyside |
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile
So how do you know they legitimately know you and where you work ? "
theyv identified his place of work... |
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
They identified you at work ? Or they identified you here and messaged you , saying they work where you work ?
Messaged me having seen me at work last night "
So they SAW you in a public place doing your job ..... they don't work with you ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile
So how do you know they legitimately know you and where you work ? "
I guess I don't. But it is very likely |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
They identified you at work ? Or they identified you here and messaged you , saying they work where you work ?
Messaged me having seen me at work last night
So they SAW you in a public place doing your job ..... they don't work with you ?"
Yep |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Seems very odd that they'd message you to reveal they work with you and recognise you. Most sensible people would not choose to expose themselves.
If you choose to show your face pic, it's a risk you take.
Just block them, they're also on the site, and there's no shame of being on here. Ignore and move on  |
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I feel like fooking Perry Mason.....
Just spill the facts.
I once had a bloke message me to say he saw me going through the Mersey Tunnel at the pay booth with my son in law and grandchildren. .....
Didn't make me tell the world or stop using the Mersey Tunnel. I just thought thank God I only ever meet nice people. He was someone i'd met.
|
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
They identified you at work ? Or they identified you here and messaged you , saying they work where you work ?
Messaged me having seen me at work last night "
They must be interested, Perhaps its your boss checking if your on fab whilst your meant to be a productive employee. |
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By *os19Man
over a year ago
Edmonton |
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh. "
. I don’t think you are a idiot for putting a face picture on here it can save time if some can see your face pictures straight away with regards to messaging or not.The person that messaged you do they want to meet or are they threatening to report you to your employer. |
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
They identified you at work ? Or they identified you here and messaged you , saying they work where you work ?
Messaged me having seen me at work last night
So they SAW you in a public place doing your job ..... they don't work with you ?
Yep"
Ah blow them. Not literally - just ignore it.
Anyway.... I suspect it's someone that you have TOLD where you work and they are winding you up seeing as the profile was so sparse. |
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile "
That kind of thing bugs me. If you recognise someone, but don't want them also to know who you are, why mail them to say you know them? That's just silly immature game-playing to me. If they're not adult enough to simply realise they've recognised you, and either say nothing at all to you about it or give you a discreet virtual nod to say 'me too', that says enough about them. Long before I ever put a public face pic on my profile I used to get juvenile messages from guys who thought they recognised me (and sometimes had) and would do the whole tittering 'I know who you are thing' but would refuse to say who they were... I can't say such immature behaviour ever made me want to meet them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh. "
If someone from your work place says to you “ you’re on Fab etc just give a reply of , so ; in that teenage voice they’re good at |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
If someone from your work place says to you “ you’re on Fab etc just give a reply of , so ; in that teenage voice they’re good at "
the haribo voice? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
If someone from your work place says to you “ you’re on Fab etc just give a reply of , so ; in that teenage voice they’re good at the haribo voice? "
 |
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"I've been spotted loads I just block
Noted... "
Tbh I only block if I feel threatened by the person who messaged. Most messages of that nature I get are fairly innocuous! I’ve been recognised both at Tesco and my place of work - though no idea how as to me I look (deliberately) very different to my fab photos!
In all cases they didn’t ‘call me out’ either at Tesco or at work - they simply messaged me afterwards to say hello and that they’d spotted me!
Most people on here are discreet and nice!
However op - though I usually have my face pic on my profile I wouldn’t have it as my avatar op - but that’s just personal preference! X |
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile
That kind of thing bugs me. If you recognise someone, but don't want them also to know who you are, why mail them to say you know them? That's just silly immature game-playing to me. If they're not adult enough to simply realise they've recognised you, and either say nothing at all to you about it or give you a discreet virtual nod to say 'me too', that says enough about them. Long before I ever put a public face pic on my profile I used to get juvenile messages from guys who thought they recognised me (and sometimes had) and would do the whole tittering 'I know who you are thing' but would refuse to say who they were... I can't say such immature behaviour ever made me want to meet them. "
Tittering, that about sums it up.  .
Immaturity at it's best.
I think the only response to this sort of thing is "and..." |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile
That kind of thing bugs me. If you recognise someone, but don't want them also to know who you are, why mail them to say you know them? That's just silly immature game-playing to me. If they're not adult enough to simply realise they've recognised you, and either say nothing at all to you about it or give you a discreet virtual nod to say 'me too', that says enough about them. Long before I ever put a public face pic on my profile I used to get juvenile messages from guys who thought they recognised me (and sometimes had) and would do the whole tittering 'I know who you are thing' but would refuse to say who they were... I can't say such immature behaviour ever made me want to meet them. "
Yeah it does smack of "I have one over on you" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I had someone stalking me for over 2 years, telling me they'd seen me, knew what I was wearing, where I lived, the car I drove, passed me in the street, and yet wouldn't reveal himself. I kept him on side coz I wanted to find out who he was. I couldn't do it. I still have no idea 4 years on.
I no longer meet other than in the club, my postcode is over 100 miles incorrect, never show full face pic public.
I hope your message was a nice one, but it is very unnerving when someone knows you but won't reveal themselves.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile
That kind of thing bugs me. If you recognise someone, but don't want them also to know who you are, why mail them to say you know them? That's just silly immature game-playing to me. If they're not adult enough to simply realise they've recognised you, and either say nothing at all to you about it or give you a discreet virtual nod to say 'me too', that says enough about them. Long before I ever put a public face pic on my profile I used to get juvenile messages from guys who thought they recognised me (and sometimes had) and would do the whole tittering 'I know who you are thing' but would refuse to say who they were... I can't say such immature behaviour ever made me want to meet them.
Tittering, that about sums it up. .
Immaturity at it's best.
I think the only response to this sort of thing is "and...""
and what?  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I've been spotted loads I just block
Noted...
Tbh I only block if I feel threatened by the person who messaged. Most messages of that nature I get are fairly innocuous! I’ve been recognised both at Tesco and my place of work - though no idea how as to me I look (deliberately) very different to my fab photos!
In all cases they didn’t ‘call me out’ either at Tesco or at work - they simply messaged me afterwards to say hello and that they’d spotted me!
Most people on here are discreet and nice!
However op - though I usually have my face pic on my profile I wouldn’t have it as my avatar op - but that’s just personal preference! X"
Noted re avatar pic. Good call |
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile
That kind of thing bugs me. If you recognise someone, but don't want them also to know who you are, why mail them to say you know them? That's just silly immature game-playing to me. If they're not adult enough to simply realise they've recognised you, and either say nothing at all to you about it or give you a discreet virtual nod to say 'me too', that says enough about them. Long before I ever put a public face pic on my profile I used to get juvenile messages from guys who thought they recognised me (and sometimes had) and would do the whole tittering 'I know who you are thing' but would refuse to say who they were... I can't say such immature behaviour ever made me want to meet them.
Tittering, that about sums it up. .
Immaturity at it's best.
I think the only response to this sort of thing is "and..."and what? "
And what is the best vodka with which to mix a skinny bitch cocktail? Zero carbs doncha know. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I had someone stalking me for over 2 years, telling me they'd seen me, knew what I was wearing, where I lived, the car I drove, passed me in the street, and yet wouldn't reveal himself. I kept him on side coz I wanted to find out who he was. I couldn't do it. I still have no idea 4 years on.
I no longer meet other than in the club, my postcode is over 100 miles incorrect, never show full face pic public.
I hope your message was a nice one, but it is very unnerving when someone knows you but won't reveal themselves.
"
That sounds creepy. Yeah it was a non threatening message... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
have they identified themselves to you?
No. Fairly anon profile
That kind of thing bugs me. If you recognise someone, but don't want them also to know who you are, why mail them to say you know them? That's just silly immature game-playing to me. If they're not adult enough to simply realise they've recognised you, and either say nothing at all to you about it or give you a discreet virtual nod to say 'me too', that says enough about them. Long before I ever put a public face pic on my profile I used to get juvenile messages from guys who thought they recognised me (and sometimes had) and would do the whole tittering 'I know who you are thing' but would refuse to say who they were... I can't say such immature behaviour ever made me want to meet them.
Tittering, that about sums it up. .
Immaturity at it's best.
I think the only response to this sort of thing is "and..."and what?
And what is the best vodka with which to mix a skinny bitch cocktail? Zero carbs doncha know."
lol hey please dont mention alcohol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Why are you an idiot. There is nothing wrong with being on here.
Idiot for posting face pics is what I meant... "
Yeah I know. I wouldn't call you an idiot for that at all. Unless its likely to get you fired or you're cheating.
You're entitled to a sex life arent you?
Face pics help on here. Especially if you're a man, helps you stand out.
Own it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had someone stalking me for over 2 years, telling me they'd seen me, knew what I was wearing, where I lived, the car I drove, passed me in the street, and yet wouldn't reveal himself. I kept him on side coz I wanted to find out who he was. I couldn't do it. I still have no idea 4 years on.
I no longer meet other than in the club, my postcode is over 100 miles incorrect, never show full face pic public.
I hope your message was a nice one, but it is very unnerving when someone knows you but won't reveal themselves.
That sounds creepy. Yeah it was a non threatening message... "
Very, it's something that is still in my mind every day I go out of the house. I hope he sees this.
Best wishes for a good resolution for yours. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Why are you an idiot. There is nothing wrong with being on here.
Idiot for posting face pics is what I meant...
Yeah I know. I wouldn't call you an idiot for that at all. Unless its likely to get you fired or you're cheating.
You're entitled to a sex life arent you?
Face pics help on here. Especially if you're a man, helps you stand out.
Own it "
Yeah you're right... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I had someone stalking me for over 2 years, telling me they'd seen me, knew what I was wearing, where I lived, the car I drove, passed me in the street, and yet wouldn't reveal himself. I kept him on side coz I wanted to find out who he was. I couldn't do it. I still have no idea 4 years on.
I no longer meet other than in the club, my postcode is over 100 miles incorrect, never show full face pic public.
I hope your message was a nice one, but it is very unnerving when someone knows you but won't reveal themselves.
That sounds creepy. Yeah it was a non threatening message...
Very, it's something that is still in my mind every day I go out of the house. I hope he sees this.
Best wishes for a good resolution for yours."
non-threatening or not, I'd report that to police, or warn that would be my intention if it continued. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The longer you leave your face visible to the rest of fab world, the more people from work will recognise you.
If you don't mind, then it doesn't matter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Why are you an idiot. There is nothing wrong with being on here.
Idiot for posting face pics is what I meant...
Yeah I know. I wouldn't call you an idiot for that at all. Unless its likely to get you fired or you're cheating.
You're entitled to a sex life arent you?
Face pics help on here. Especially if you're a man, helps you stand out.
Own it
Yeah you're right... "
You're doing nothing wrong mate.
Teaching or NHS have issues with it, but it's really none of their business of anyone elses.
Being on here doesnt make us any less effective at our jobs, whatever that may be.
Society needs to grow a pair and learn about sex. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The longer you leave your face visible to the rest of fab world, the more people from work will recognise you.
If you don't mind, then it doesn't matter."
Yeah it's not the end of the world.
I really appreciate everyone's input tho. It's good to talk... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I (her) have experience of this too, at first it bothered me because I keep my private life apart from my work life and I never mix business and pleasure.
I have had a guy describe to me exactly where I sit in work, and name my colleagues. I had another tell me he has been out on a work night out with me, and only last week a guy messaged telling me the name of my organisation and that he would love to f#ck the manager (me)....
My advice is to remain calm (don't fret), block these people who cross the discretion line and continue doing the things that make you happy. Never show people that they affect you or make you feel self conscious or nervous for the choices in life you make.
I walk around my organisation with confidence because of my ability to do my job well, but also with confidence that those peeps who know a little about me outside of work will never get close to me... so they can carry on enjoying me from a distance.
Good luck OP |
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"I've been spotted loads I just block
Noted...
Tbh I only block if I feel threatened by the person who messaged. Most messages of that nature I get are fairly innocuous! I’ve been recognised both at Tesco and my place of work - though no idea how as to me I look (deliberately) very different to my fab photos!
In all cases they didn’t ‘call me out’ either at Tesco or at work - they simply messaged me afterwards to say hello and that they’d spotted me!
Most people on here are discreet and nice!
However op - though I usually have my face pic on my profile I wouldn’t have it as my avatar op - but that’s just personal preference! X"
Having met you in person Peachy, you look exactly like your photos. But unless someone has you hotlisted and is seeing your face in photos every day, or in their local updates, most of us are unlikely to go about our daily lives thinking there's that guy/girl from Fab who's face I saw in a photo once... We often don't even remember faces we have seen in person unless we've also had an interaction, for example would you remember the face of each person waiting at a taxi rank or even someone you'd walked past and said good morning to on the street? There may be a vague sense of something familiar if you run into someone again, or see their face pic somewhere, but unless you're seeing it and encountering the actual person in your public life with some degree of frequency, your mind is unlikely to jump right to 'that's him/her off Fab'. |
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I always see it as being on here is a lifestyle choice
If you don't bring the company you work for into disrepute and if someone challenges you about being on here you own it and aren't embarrassed about it .. what's the problem.
The industry I work in, integrity and liability to succumb to bl*ckmail is important, so that would be the only consideration.
If i am challenged on being on here I'd say so what, what's my personal life got to do with work so long as i continue to do my work professionally |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I (her) have experience of this too, at first it bothered me because I keep my private life apart from my work life and I never mix business and pleasure.
I have had a guy describe to me exactly where I sit in work, and name my colleagues. I had another tell me he has been out on a work night out with me, and only last week a guy messaged telling me the name of my organisation and that he would love to f#ck the manager (me)....
My advice is to remain calm (don't fret), block these people who cross the discretion line and continue doing the things that make you happy. Never show people that they affect you or make you feel self conscious or nervous for the choices in life you make.
I walk around my organisation with confidence because of my ability to do my job well, but also with confidence that those peeps who know a little about me outside of work will never get close to me... so they can carry on enjoying me from a distance.
Good luck OP"
Thank you... |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
In the past, my ex partner got spotted out with kids and was very loudly approached; "Oh you're xxx from fab, I love your pictures!"
Cue delete of all pictures and profiles. Totally indiscreet and awful.
I've seen people that I've seen on fab, met or had socials with out and about. A small smile, nod or 'hi' is fine, a respectful message might be OK. The fact that everyone is a real person, with a life, job and everything else, shouldn't be news to anyone, sadly it is to some though. |
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There are many views appearing here, all relevant.
• There is no shame to being on Fab.
• Just block the creepy ones that don’t identify themselves.
• Keep everything hidden.
And so on. What matters is how these type of messages make the recipient feel.
Most often I’m sure we’d brush it off. But if there are any type of fears, insecurities or worries then it is having a bad effect.
For those of us that have had genuine stalker issues it seems far worse.
I think the OP has no shame about being here but just wanted to chat it over with others. |
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On the other site a gay guy from work spotted me. However my job requirements are that you have to be seen as someone who is trustworthy with sensitive information. So if he gossips about me it could have a detrimental effect on his role, although I know he's told three people. I can't obviously bring it up either so a bit catch 22, however I don't care too much, as I live alone and don't intend to work there too much longer.
I'm actually quite knowledgeable about online trolling and searching for people, so if anyone tried to expose me they'd be in for quite a bit of backlash |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh. "
Man or woman did they say who they were? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh. "
I was spotted by a colleague and I only showed face-lips and hair. I know he'll keep his mouth shut, but if I ever left the job, he'd have something to say then. People are pathetic!
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh. "
...and yet, six hours later, your face pic is still here! |
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh. "
If they saw you here then they are just as naughty as you are! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
...and yet, six hours later, your face pic is still here!"
Yeah well as Genghis pointed out I think I'm just gonna own it. For now at least |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You’re quite identifiable, OP"
Yeah part idiot, part devil may care. If I lose all the face pics this week you know I've come to a decision. I do appreciate everyone's comments. I just wanted to thrash it out. |
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By *onty1971Man
over a year ago
London St Helier Trier |
"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
I was spotted by a colleague and I only showed face-lips and hair. I know he'll keep his mouth shut, but if I ever left the job, he'd have something to say then. People are pathetic!
"
My best female friend swings and I have not told anyone. She does not swing with me. It all came out in conversation after 18 years being friends. Have become better friends because of it. So been pretty good. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Someone's identified me at my place of work and messaged me. Serves me right for putting my face pic up. It's not the end of the world, but it's not cool either.
Has this happened to you? Did you block them? Am I an idiot for putting my face on here? Sigh.
I was spotted by a colleague and I only showed face-lips and hair. I know he'll keep his mouth shut, but if I ever left the job, he'd have something to say then. People are pathetic!
My best female friend swings and I have not told anyone. She does not swing with me. It all came out in conversation after 18 years being friends. Have become better friends because of it. So been pretty good."
One of the lucky ones. Nice to read something positive x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have someone with a profile who works next door to us, he messaged us but when he is on we just hide ourselves.
Im not really bothered but i have children so they are my priority x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I thought the unwritten rule was that you don't contact ppl you know from the real world, you just let them go about their business in peace. That's what most ppl would want surely.... ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I thought the unwritten rule was that you don't contact ppl you know from the real world, you just let them go about their business in peace. That's what most ppl would want surely.... ?"
Yes you'd hope so. |
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Let's say in life there's a lot worse things that could happen than getting recognised on here..I mean unless you're in a relationship and on here secretly I'd say there's very little to worry about.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Let's say in life there's a lot worse things that could happen than getting recognised on here..I mean unless you're in a relationship and on here secretly I'd say there's very little to worry about.. "
depends where you live a small vallage for example or close nit community and you suddenly become either a perverted sex fiend or a slag of the town so i think it definitely matters people love 2 things gossip and complaining
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I too worry about this.
I generally reveal my fizzog in the early hours or if it's asked for.
You know showing a tattoo will give you away to people who know you. "
Mmmmm.....true, looks like plan C then! X |
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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago
Bristol East |
"I thought the unwritten rule was that you don't contact ppl you know from the real world, you just let them go about their business in peace. That's what most ppl would want surely.... ?"
Some people are nasty, basically. |
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By *onty1971Man
over a year ago
London St Helier Trier |
"I’ve been recognised lots of times on here, but only one was a pest.. nothing to hide so I let it go over my head x "
I had a Lady (not from Fab) try and use my real identity against me. On face value it did not make sense from how she explained things but the story unravelled once that all started. Wary and cynical I have tried not to become but it was not nice. I get the point about face pictures before a date to know about attraction but there is the other dark or mean side to consider. |
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Ive been seen before by people who said they know me, tried threaten me but it turned out to be a wind up.
On the other hand ive recognised a fair few i know or know of and ive never said a word. Theres a couple of us that know of each other again our little secret. Also had a few turn up for fun only for ne to recognise them but they have no idea its me. Very scary but oh so kinky.
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By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago
Near Wells |
I run my own business and had a message "are you from (the name of my business)"? I said no but I do buy stuff from them.
He actually wanted to meet but I turned him down in case we recognised each other. I don't think he would have been nasty about it but I didn't want to take the risk. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a guy message saying he recognised me and threatened to out me and put my pics up on the notice board where I work he wouldn't reveal himself and thankfully never went through with his threat  |
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