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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Positive attitude and a belief in yourself. Don’t feel you have to conform to anything or anyone else’s vision of what you should be. Just be you, from that will come confidence.
I find confidence is a situation dependent emotion. Sometimes I feel super confident (not arrogant) and others, if it’s slightly out my comfort zone, then confidence level can be low to non existent. |
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By *manaWoman
over a year ago
Basingstoke |
I finally realised I'm not here to make others accept me.
I'm just me, I dont try to be anyone else and if people don't like me then that's ok. I'm a good person and it doesn't matter what size I am because all that matters is that I do my best so my daughter realises that's what important in life.
Now I am a confident person xx |
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"I finally realised I'm not here to make others accept me.
I'm just me, I dont try to be anyone else and if people don't like me then that's ok. I'm a good person and it doesn't matter what size I am because all that matters is that I do my best so my daughter realises that's what important in life.
Now I am a confident person xx"
This is me, too. It took a long time to get there, but I'm OK as I am, I'm doing the best I can, and anyone who demands I be otherwise or puts me down for who I am can take a flying leap. |
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There is no right or wrong way to build confidence.
It really comes down to believing in yourself and the decisions you make are correct for you.
Over thinking things can lead to doubt, sometimes it is best to just go with your initial gut reaction. Coupled with not worrying what everyone else thinks about you.
Just be who you want to be
But if that isn’t working put me n a face that oozes confidence even though inside your a bag of nerves ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me I have always had it and doesn't really get dented no matter how rude people are. I think a lot has to do with being happy within your skin just learn to like yourself and confidence follows. |
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"I finally realised I'm not here to make others accept me.
I'm just me, I dont try to be anyone else and if people don't like me then that's ok. I'm a good person and it doesn't matter what size I am because all that matters is that I do my best so my daughter realises that's what important in life.
Now I am a confident person xx
This is me, too. It took a long time to get there, but I'm OK as I am, I'm doing the best I can, and anyone who demands I be otherwise or puts me down for who I am can take a flying leap. "
You don’t need to read my post, you’re doing it already |
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"There is no right or wrong way to build confidence.
It really comes down to believing in yourself and the decisions you make are correct for you.
Over thinking things can lead to doubt, sometimes it is best to just go with your initial gut reaction. Coupled with not worrying what everyone else thinks about you.
Just be who you want to be "
I think yes... and no. I personally had to do a lot of thinking and work to be able to get to a point where confidence was a possibility. And I think some of us are just wired to overthink.
We find our own way, though. And I suspect all of the mere mortals among us are works in progress. |
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Accepting that I can't be in charge of what other people think has been liberating and my confidence has built as a result.
Also, accepting that I am enough and not beating myself up for failing to reach my own self-imposed high standards
I'm more comfortable in my own skin and therefore more confident than I have ever been.
Mrs TMN x |
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"There is no right or wrong way to build confidence.
It really comes down to believing in yourself and the decisions you make are correct for you.
Over thinking things can lead to doubt, sometimes it is best to just go with your initial gut reaction. Coupled with not worrying what everyone else thinks about you.
Just be who you want to be
I think yes... and no. I personally had to do a lot of thinking and work to be able to get to a point where confidence was a possibility. And I think some of us are just wired to overthink.
We find our own way, though. And I suspect all of the mere mortals among us are works in progress. "
I agree a lot of work goes into it and there’s a pride when you accomplish it.
The one place I’m not confident is public speaking. I can stand up in front of a room of people I’ve known for years and know what I’m saying is right, but inside I’m a gibberish wreck and talking the speed of light. I know it’s purely down to I don’t like being the centre of attention |
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By *arksxMan
over a year ago
Leicester / London |
"Just being myself.
And for those of us who aren't you? "
Be YOURSELF
Once you be the real you..
Who could be you, but you?
Confidence is owning the things that make you an individual |
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"What makes you feel confident? How do you build your confidence? "
I just dont let what other people think of me get to me.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and if they dont like me that's their problem.
I'm just happy being me.
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"Ooh public speaking. *shudder*"
Exactly !
I’m likely to be leaving my job at the end of the year and I will depart early than they think, just to avoid the usual goodbye speech horror and send a timed email instead |
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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
It took a long time and a few failed relationships for me to be who I always should have been.
I dont judge myself by others standards. There will always be someone bigger, faster, stronger, prettier, cleverer.
But none of those fuckers are me.. |
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"Accepting that I can't be in charge of what other people think has been liberating and my confidence has built as a result.
Also, accepting that I am enough and not beating myself up for failing to reach my own self-imposed high standards
I'm more comfortable in my own skin and therefore more confident than I have ever been.
Mrs TMN x "
This ^^^
It's been a game changer!! |
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This is a difficult question to answer. If I'm going in to a situation where I know I'm going to feel less confident than usual I try to make sure I look confident, I dress well, make sure I'm well groomed etc. I also concentrate on not talking too much and holding myself still. Giving the outward appearance of confidence often makes people treat you in a way that gives you real confidence if you see what I mean |
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"This is a difficult question to answer. If I'm going in to a situation where I know I'm going to feel less confident than usual I try to make sure I look confident, I dress well, make sure I'm well groomed etc. I also concentrate on not talking too much and holding myself still. Giving the outward appearance of confidence often makes people treat you in a way that gives you real confidence if you see what I mean "
Yes, I definitely get into faking it and putting on armour if I have to.
If I'm wearing true black eyeliner, I'm probably nervous |
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"This is a difficult question to answer. If I'm going in to a situation where I know I'm going to feel less confident than usual I try to make sure I look confident, I dress well, make sure I'm well groomed etc. I also concentrate on not talking too much and holding myself still. Giving the outward appearance of confidence often makes people treat you in a way that gives you real confidence if you see what I mean
Yes, I definitely get into faking it and putting on armour if I have to.
If I'm wearing true black eyeliner, I'm probably nervous "
Ha ha if I'm wearing formal clothes and heels so am I. |
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Well I've been receiving a bit of attention off of fab recently which has really helped. Such a shame that my self confidence and self esteem is based off of the reactions of other people but it is what it is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I’m at my peak - I’m training & eating correctly.
- lifting weights.
- cage fighting
- rugby
So pretty much when I’m always doing something. Then I’m at my most confident |
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"Well I've been receiving a bit of attention off of fab recently which has really helped. Such a shame that my self confidence and self esteem is based off of the reactions of other people but it is what it is."
I think a lot of people's is. It's why I dress the part in a situation where I know I'm going to feel at a disadvantage even though 98% of the time I genuinely don't care what other people think of me there are times I need to eg job interviews. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It took a long time and a few failed relationships for me to be who I always should have been.
I dont judge myself by others standards. There will always be someone bigger, faster, stronger, prettier, cleverer.
But none of those fuckers are me.."
Love this.
I'm confident in certain areas of my life.
I'm not confident in other areas.
For me it comes from knowing and believing things rather than guesswork or blind hope.
P |
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"Well I've been receiving a bit of attention off of fab recently which has really helped. Such a shame that my self confidence and self esteem is based off of the reactions of other people but it is what it is.
I think a lot of people's is. It's why I dress the part in a situation where I know I'm going to feel at a disadvantage even though 98% of the time I genuinely don't care what other people think of me there are times I need to eg job interviews. "
Fab has taught me I can't rely on other people for my confidence. Way too fickle |
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By *manaWoman
over a year ago
Basingstoke |
"I finally realised I'm not here to make others accept me.
I'm just me, I dont try to be anyone else and if people don't like me then that's ok. I'm a good person and it doesn't matter what size I am because all that matters is that I do my best so my daughter realises that's what important in life.
Now I am a confident person xx
This is me, too. It took a long time to get there, but I'm OK as I am, I'm doing the best I can, and anyone who demands I be otherwise or puts me down for who I am can take a flying leap. "
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I think confidence comes from various "understanding of yourself" and how you interact with your environment.
Finding and understanding your strength, weakness, passion, mindset and belief also have to be aware not everyone will share the same passion, view especially belief.
You always have to work on yourself to keep the confidence tank full relearning and reexperiencing life. |
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"Well I've been receiving a bit of attention off of fab recently which has really helped. Such a shame that my self confidence and self esteem is based off of the reactions of other people but it is what it is.
I think a lot of people's is. It's why I dress the part in a situation where I know I'm going to feel at a disadvantage even though 98% of the time I genuinely don't care what other people think of me there are times I need to eg job interviews.
Fab has taught me I can't rely on other people for my confidence. Way too fickle"
People who love you help you with confidence. Babies are born confident, the people who love them (or are supposed to) either encourage it or not. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Confidence for me is not relying on peoples back pats and sweeteners of kind words to feel good about myself. Something what should ignite from within, but gentle blows of compliments and support can put it on fire.
What is required in my case is a thoughtful choice of people i surround myself with... feeding myself with positives in different forms.. mindfulness.. it is not always easy ride. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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By doing my utmost not to lie about anything.
That way I can have full confidence in everything I say being the truth as I see it.
I learnt to like myself and trust myself again. Leaving the door wide open for others to treat me the same, if they feel the same way. |
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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"It took a long time and a few failed relationships for me to be who I always should have been.
I dont judge myself by others standards. There will always be someone bigger, faster, stronger, prettier, cleverer.
But none of those fuckers are me..
Love this.
I'm confident in certain areas of my life.
I'm not confident in other areas.
For me it comes from knowing and believing things rather than guesswork or blind hope.
P"
I've had relationships where I was constantly put down, and made to feel bad for being me.
No more.. I am free to be me. People seem to like that. I have nothing to prove. I dont use social media. I just get up and work my arse off every day. If I'm doing something it's because I want to do it. If I'm with someone it's because we both want to be there..
I dont live surrounded by a fog if vagueness. If I like you I will say so.. if you like me too that's great. I am very rarely misunderstood |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I’m in the zone I’m at my most confident. Any other time I’ll be more of less self conscious. I’m certainly not lacking in confidence however I am naturally slightly nervous. It’s in my genes - I blame my mum |
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"This is a difficult question to answer. If I'm going in to a situation where I know I'm going to feel less confident than usual I try to make sure I look confident, I dress well, make sure I'm well groomed etc. I also concentrate on not talking too much and holding myself still. Giving the outward appearance of confidence often makes people treat you in a way that gives you real confidence if you see what I mean "
Fake it until you make it! Definitely works for me in public situations. |
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My confidence seems to have been knocked on an almost daily basis recently.
I have to remind myself of the battles I've fought and won, where I am now compared to 5yrs ago.
It's not easy, negative thoughts are hard to ignore, self doubt & fear can be crippling at times.
There are days I just feel like giving up...
Then I remember I have a lot of people to prove wrong.
I'm not that broken woman shutting herself away from the world anymore.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My confidence seems to have been knocked on an almost daily basis recently.
I have to remind myself of the battles I've fought and won, where I am now compared to 5yrs ago.
It's not easy, negative thoughts are hard to ignore, self doubt & fear can be crippling at times.
There are days I just feel like giving up...
Then I remember I have a lot of people to prove wrong.
I'm not that broken woman shutting herself away from the world anymore.
"
I dong know why, but you strike me as being confident. |
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It's really interesting that many people on this thread who come across - on the surface to me, at least - as confident have in fact struggled with this. Is it to do with knowing yourself better through adversity? I think it is for me.
Mrs TMN x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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After years of having any confidence I had stripped from me, I suddenly found the courage to stand up and break the cycle of abuse and become myself again. I struggle a lot of the time but with some very patient important people in my life I’m starting to believe what they say and thinking that I’m worth it.
Its still an ongoing work in progress but getting there slowly x |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I think it can vary dependent on the situation/circumstances etc. - some things I'm fairly confident about and that comes through knowledge and experience.
Some things I'm not so confident about and just have to pull on the big boy pants and wing it and if it's a one off hope that I get away with it, or if it's likely to be a regular thing then hope that the repetition will breed the required confidence as time goes by.
I don't think it's necessarily something you can consciously "get" though more a natural thing that develops over a period of time - although there are (depending what the thing is) of course actions you can consciously take that will ultimately help that sense of confidence if that makes sense? |
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"My confidence seems to have been knocked on an almost daily basis recently.
I have to remind myself of the battles I've fought and won, where I am now compared to 5yrs ago.
It's not easy, negative thoughts are hard to ignore, self doubt & fear can be crippling at times.
There are days I just feel like giving up...
Then I remember I have a lot of people to prove wrong.
I'm not that broken woman shutting herself away from the world anymore.
I dong know why, but you strike me as being confident. "
I wasn't always, life shit knocks you down.
But I fixed myself, or I thought I had.
Just a few recent events, physical & emotional have brought back a lot of old memories.
Then it becomes a vicious circle.
Think there a few things I need to remove from my life right now, as I know they're a big part of it |
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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago
near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack! |
Public speaking - I hate it! My position in an enthusiasts club means I have to occasionally speak in front of the club members. Thank goodness it`s only once a year!
However, I have to give a very short reading at a funeral this coming Friday. It`s a very short poem that has a big reference to my deceased friend and my need to read the poem is dampening my rear of speaking in public. |
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"I finally realised I'm not here to make others accept me.
I'm just me, I dont try to be anyone else and if people don't like me then that's ok. I'm a good person and it doesn't matter what size I am because all that matters is that I do my best so my daughter realises that's what important in life.
Now I am a confident person xx"
Go girl! Good for you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am confident in my work and pastimes/activities, but not so much socially, depending on the group. That said, I am very much couldn't give a toss...not sure how that translates? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Self-confidence is about self-belief. That can be hard to muster sometimes but surrounding yourself with positive people who encourage you and push you along just that bit more each time will build it.
Avoid the negative people ... they have a problem, not you.
Occasionally takes leaps of faith. You will succeed more than you fail. And turn weaknesses into your greatest strength. Work on them until you have.
I'll stop there before I get carried away! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I struggle admittedly. I'm very much fake it till you make it. However I have a wonderful husband who supports me and a wonderful guy in my life who has broken down all my walls and when I'm with him I feel like the most beautiful girl alive |
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