FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Getting females to reply
Getting females to reply
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Does any other guy find it hard to get any responses on here?
What do you guys put in a first message to make it stand out?
Females what are you looking for to make you reply?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't send preemptive faf messages, when I do mail a lady on here, it's usually something forum related, and sometimes that leads to a bit of flirting and occasionally a meet  "
Sounds like good advice, your verifications prove it is. This is the first time I've used the forums so will keep an eye out for lady's that catch my attention |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No it’s so easy. Ya just message them tell them you’ve got a huge cock and you’ll make the cum so much and also send a photoshopped photo of your huge cock. Instant message. Simples "
Is that sarcasm??  Any man that sends me that type of message gets blocked straight away,no matter how crazily hot he is |
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"One guy messaged me "hi". I deleted it. 5 min later he messaged "gangbang".
I mean c'mon!?!
Would you reply to any of that? "
I often get variants on "you. Me. Mine. Now"
Occasionally I reply. "No" and block. |
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"One guy messaged me "hi". I deleted it. 5 min later he messaged "gangbang".
I mean c'mon!?!
Would you reply to any of that? "
Depends who it came from? I mean maybe if you send it we may reply
Nope if people have read our profile we will atleast mall them with no thank you. If they haven’t we just delete. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One guy messaged me "hi". I deleted it. 5 min later he messaged "gangbang".
I mean c'mon!?!
Would you reply to any of that?
How quickly were you out the door and on your way??  "
I was quick to block that charmer |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One guy messaged me "hi". I deleted it. 5 min later he messaged "gangbang".
I mean c'mon!?!
Would you reply to any of that?
Depends who it came from? I mean maybe if you send it we may reply
Nope if people have read our profile we will atleast mall them with no thank you. If they haven’t we just delete. "
Sorry guys but I never send a message first  |
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"One guy messaged me "hi". I deleted it. 5 min later he messaged "gangbang".
I mean c'mon!?!
Would you reply to any of that?
How quickly were you out the door and on your way??
I was quick to block that charmer "
Was just asking for a friend, in case it worked  |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"I don't send preemptive faf messages, when I do mail a lady on here, it's usually something forum related, and sometimes that leads to a bit of flirting and occasionally a meet "
Agreed, I've met people from the forum that I wouldnt normally meet as well. |
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"I don't send preemptive faf messages, when I do mail a lady on here, it's usually something forum related, and sometimes that leads to a bit of flirting and occasionally a meet
Agreed, I've met people from the forum that I wouldnt normally meet as well. "
Ditto. Although those who just think it's an easy way into knickers are obvious and to be avoided. |
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"I don't send preemptive faf messages, when I do mail a lady on here, it's usually something forum related, and sometimes that leads to a bit of flirting and occasionally a meet
Agreed, I've met people from the forum that I wouldnt normally meet as well.
Ditto. Although those who just think it's an easy way into knickers are obvious and to be avoided. "
You mean this isn't Instashag?? |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"I don't send preemptive faf messages, when I do mail a lady on here, it's usually something forum related, and sometimes that leads to a bit of flirting and occasionally a meet
Agreed, I've met people from the forum that I wouldnt normally meet as well.
Ditto. Although those who just think it's an easy way into knickers are obvious and to be avoided.
You mean this isn't Instashag?? "
No. Its dialagash. |
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"I don't send preemptive faf messages, when I do mail a lady on here, it's usually something forum related, and sometimes that leads to a bit of flirting and occasionally a meet
Agreed, I've met people from the forum that I wouldnt normally meet as well.
Ditto. Although those who just think it's an easy way into knickers are obvious and to be avoided.
You mean this isn't Instashag?? "
I'm breaking the contract I signed! Depriving the men! Oh no! |
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"I don't send preemptive faf messages, when I do mail a lady on here, it's usually something forum related, and sometimes that leads to a bit of flirting and occasionally a meet
Agreed, I've met people from the forum that I wouldnt normally meet as well.
Ditto. Although those who just think it's an easy way into knickers are obvious and to be avoided.
You mean this isn't Instashag??
No. Its dialagash. "
My mistake |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You can't "get females to reply".
There is no magic formula that will work, every lady here is different.
Reading profiles and forum posts help but you are never guaranteed a response. "
This 
If one approaches this site or people in general with the expectation that they *have* to reply to some magic formula then their approach is wrong and lacks respect for the people they want to communicate with.
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I think profile and picture choice is more important than the first message. A terrible message can definitely sink you, but it doesn’t matter how good the message is if the profile is just a sea of dick pics and “fill in later” because the message probably won’t even be read |
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"You can't "get females to reply".
There is no magic formula that will work, every lady here is different.
Reading profiles and forum posts help but you are never guaranteed a response.
This
If one approaches this site or people in general with the expectation that they *have* to reply to some magic formula then their approach is wrong and lacks respect for the people they want to communicate with.
"
And realistically if the shoe were on the other foot, guys would do the same to us. It's not personal, it's just what works. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you actually read profiles and put effort into a well thought out message you'd be surprised how much the ladies on here appreciate it.
Not everyone will reply though. So don't throw a hissy fit or be a dick if they don't just move on.
Failing that, dick next to sky remote.... Fool proof plan. Guaranteed to get you positive responses |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I tend to look at the profile before deciding if I'll reply. If it doesn't appeal then what's written in the message is irrelevant. "
I do just the same. us ladies just know what we like it's no offence to any one but there could be other factors as why.....but you get over it like everyone else
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"If one approaches this site or people in general with the expectation that they *have* to reply to some magic formula then their approach is wrong and lacks respect for the people they want to communicate with. "
^This, if you are in a pub or wherever, and some randomer came over and started chatting to you, you would be totally in your rights to ignore them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does any other guy find it hard to get any responses on here?
What do you guys put in a first message to make it stand out?
Females what are you looking for to make you reply?
"
Don’t think many females here are looking to be “made” to reply. Maybe rethink your profile if you’re not attracting the attention you desire |
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"Does any other guy find it hard to get any responses on here?
What do you guys put in a first message to make it stand out?
Females what are you looking for to make you reply?
"
You know how to do that crying emoji?
I just send half a dozen of them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just write "hey" and send a pic of your cock, preferably hidden by a big sea of pubes. Oh, and change your profile so it just says "fill in later" - it never fails. "
Along with 'Cannot accommodate. Cannot travel' - that's always a good one! Plenty of pics of you having unprotected vaginal and anal sex are always a winner. Or, just keep your profile to a silhouette and 'here for fun' as your text and you will have them queuing up!
Don't bother seeing us females as people with ordinary feelings, hopes and dreams. And don't think of this as a lifestyle choice with its own rules and expectations..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I tend to look at the profile before deciding if I'll reply. If it doesn't appeal then what's written in the message is irrelevant. "
Haha I've always believed this to be the case  |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"I tend to look at the profile before deciding if I'll reply. If it doesn't appeal then what's written in the message is irrelevant. "
This is how I use fab as well, can't be arsed with a decent profile? Then I'm out, no matter what the message says |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not really, I've had plenty of responses and nearly always the women don't mind chatting or at least just responding with a polite no.
The odd few have just deleted which is up to them.
No big loss |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Offer them cake
Thank me later
This is true. I misunderstood and thought it was any dessert so said ‘You’ll do tart?!’ but she read it as ‘you’ll do. Tart.”  "
Should have asked if she preferred a cream pie instead |
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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago
mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds |
"It’s so easy. Don’t be an idiot. It’s been covered a thousand times but blokes can’t be bothered to read the forums for tips "
It's not gender specific.. couples and ladies are just as guilty.   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you say im going to fuck ya bumhole 6 times as i rest can of pepsi on ya back without spilling i shit you not they will be lining up round the block
Sorry girls i had to give the secret away does it mean im out the magic circle? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You’ll be better off saying. “ I see you go to the following clubs, which one do you prefer?”
Wait for a few messages in before you start saying what you would like to do. Yes it’s a sex site but the majority of people want to know if there’s a connection before they want to play. So always start with normal chat first. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Does any other guy find it hard to get any responses on here?
What do you guys put in a first message to make it stand out?
Females what are you looking for to make you reply?
Don’t think many females here are looking to be “made” to reply. Maybe rethink your profile if you’re not attracting the attention you desire "
Wow you've taken that out of context? |
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"Does any other guy find it hard to get any responses on here?
What do you guys put in a first message to make it stand out?
Females what are you looking for to make you reply?
Don’t think many females here are looking to be “made” to reply. Maybe rethink your profile if you’re not attracting the attention you desire
Wow you've taken that out of context? "
Just a bit.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Would you check my profile and be honest of what you think? I might come off here altogether for at least 6 months to lose weight and tone up and in the process of quitting smoking but does my profile need work too? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If that was for me where is the feedback? Like any tweaks to my profile? Had about a hundred messages off men and one from a woman,so I am getting messages just not from the right sex. Any help would be greatly appreciated. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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First message I normally include the adress of their childhood home and their current email password...
I think it shows them that I am willing to put the work in beyond just reading a profile like all the other men...
I like to point out I havent used their password yet as I think it highlights my softer side...
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"First message I normally include the adress of their childhood home and their current email password...
I think it shows them that I am willing to put the work in beyond just reading a profile like all the other men...
I like to point out I havent used their password yet as I think it highlights my softer side...
"
Ahhh the Mark Chapman approach lol |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
"I’ve found it doesn’t matter what you put in a message.
They either like what they see and read, or don’t.
I’ve had replies back with a simple ‘hi’, or a few paragraphs or vice versa. "
Haha, This just reminded us of a certain lady who's profile was awash with conditions & "Good conversation, ignite my mind "If you are going to message please ensure its more than "Hi" All the usual stuff.
So we sat here composing something suitable making sure we left a few "Ins" to get a conversation going.
Got back "Hi"
H was like "Ffs!" Delete
The culprits live on both sides of the fence
S |
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"If that was for me where is the feedback? Like any tweaks to my profile? Had about a hundred messages off men and one from a woman,so I am getting messages just not from the right sex. Any help would be greatly appreciated."
Use the filters. |
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"I’ve found it doesn’t matter what you put in a message.
They either like what they see and read, or don’t.
I’ve had replies back with a simple ‘hi’, or a few paragraphs or vice versa.
Haha, This just reminded us of a certain lady who's profile was awash with conditions & "Good conversation, ignite my mind "If you are going to message please ensure its more than "Hi" All the usual stuff.
So we sat here composing something suitable making sure we left a few "Ins" to get a conversation going.
Got back "Hi"
H was like "Ffs!" Delete
The culprits live on both sides of the fence
S"
I've seen lots of profiles (some without pictures) without a personal description or listed interests etc, but instead a statement complaining about the amount of messages they're receiving and demanding 'interesting or exciting messages'.
To start your profile with a complaint will actually turn a lot of people off. So a bit of tact is necessary here. But having no description of yourself makes it hard for anyone to write a thoughtful introduction. So you're far more likely to get a lot of 'Hi' messages from non-suiters, while those you actually want to hear from are less likely to get in touch. |
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Am I the only one irked by people using females instead of women or ladies? It feels like someone is narrating a nature documentary or something. "Unfortunately the females did not respond to the males advances so he was forced to retreat back to his own den. He will have to work on his mating rituals". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only one irked by people using females instead of women or ladies? It feels like someone is narrating a nature documentary or something. "Unfortunately the females did not respond to the males advances so he was forced to retreat back to his own den. He will have to work on his mating rituals"."
Yes exactly that.
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The permutations of writing polite hand-crafted messages are vast.
I get most replies to my messages, so I can't complain there. The replies are always polite and friendly. It's having to wait 48 hours between responses comprising of one word answers is what really frustrates me.
The momentum and reciprocity is often my dilemma. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I’m the same just have no luck what so ever "
Maybe we should start pretending we are people we arnt and coming across as ultra mysterious and charming? |
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"I tend to look at the profile before deciding if I'll reply. If it doesn't appeal then what's written in the message is irrelevant. "
This is the same for me. If the profile is blank or has stuff that’s a big turn off for me then The content of the message isn’t relevant.
Surely it’s about getting meeting people who are compatible with your wants? The message content isn’t as important as the profile. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does any other guy find it hard to get any responses on here?
What do you guys put in a first message to make it stand out?
Females what are you looking for to make you reply?
"
I find that "Nice flange, mind if I fill it" almost never works |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Am I the only one irked by people using females instead of women or ladies? It feels like someone is narrating a nature documentary or something. "Unfortunately the females did not respond to the males advances so he was forced to retreat back to his own den. He will have to work on his mating rituals"."
Your Irked by the word 'female'?
I'm now beginning to understand what's changed in society over the last few years...  |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
"I’m the same just have no luck what so ever
Maybe we should start pretending we are people we arnt and coming across as ultra mysterious and charming? "
Oh for Gods sake not another fake female profile!
S |
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"Am I the only one irked by people using females instead of women or ladies? It feels like someone is narrating a nature documentary or something. "Unfortunately the females did not respond to the males advances so he was forced to retreat back to his own den. He will have to work on his mating rituals".
Your Irked by the word 'female'?
I'm now beginning to understand what's changed in society over the last few years... "
Not the word female in itself. Just being referred to by an adjective. Female footballers, female gamers, female students, etc is fine. As would be female people but that tends to sound weird so most people just use women. It's just a little jarring is all. Just an observation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only one irked by people using females instead of women or ladies? It feels like someone is narrating a nature documentary or something. "Unfortunately the females did not respond to the males advances so he was forced to retreat back to his own den. He will have to work on his mating rituals"."
Friday night dinner springs to mind |
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"Am I the only one irked by people using females instead of women or ladies? It feels like someone is narrating a nature documentary or something. "Unfortunately the females did not respond to the males advances so he was forced to retreat back to his own den. He will have to work on his mating rituals".
Friday night dinner springs to mind "
Haha! Omg yes! |
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"Does any other guy find it hard to get any responses on here?
What do you guys put in a first message to make it stand out?
Females what are you looking for to make you reply?
"
Females? Not really a sexy term. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Does any other guy find it hard to get any responses on here?
What do you guys put in a first message to make it stand out?
Females what are you looking for to make you reply?
Females? Not really a sexy term."
Wenches*
Hussys*
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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago
The Land that time forgot (Norfolk) |
"Does any other guy find it hard to get any responses on here?
What do you guys put in a first message to make it stand out?
Females what are you looking for to make you reply?
"
It would be handy if there was some kind of open public forum where you could chat to the females in a non pressured open way to see if you get on with any of them, therefore rendering the message system less important for making contacts. |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
OP.
Hang on! You've been on only 4 weeks, already have 1 verification but you are complaining?
A lot of guys would kill for that level of success and so quickly too!
This site isn't instantaneous, response wise. It takes time, Patience and Perseverance. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"OP.
Hang on! You've been on only 4 weeks, already have 1 verification but you are complaining?
A lot of guys would kill for that level of success and so quickly too!
This site isn't instantaneous, response wise. It takes time, Patience and Perseverance."
I just re-read my post but failed to see in which point I complained? Could you elaborate |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Females? Not really a sexy term.
Wenches*
Hussys*
Nice attitude. You ask for advice, but your true colours come out when you are given it.
"
It's a bit of light-hearted fun?
Offense is taken not given  |
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"Females? Not really a sexy term.
Wenches*
Hussys*
Nice attitude. You ask for advice, but your true colours come out when you are given it.
It's a bit of light-hearted fun?
Offense is taken not given "
I Wonder how many ladies will like to take offence at being called hussies & wenches.
Would rather a little respect as a human being to be honest, but each to their own. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Females? Not really a sexy term.
Wenches*
Hussys*
Nice attitude. You ask for advice, but your true colours come out when you are given it.
It's a bit of light-hearted fun?
Offense is taken not given
I Wonder how many ladies will like to take offence at being called hussies & wenches.
Would rather a little respect as a human being to be honest, but each to their own."
thanks for being understanding Hun |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No problem man, dick, cock, whatever you feel you should be called."
See your learning
Make sure you don't watch any comedies or anything incase you get offended.. just trying to look out for you.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We will never get offended by women being called females, wenches and hussies.
It says far more about you than it does about us."
The old classic line 'it says more about you than me'
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By *IjohnMan
over a year ago
dublin |
Just a heads up about your man on here looking for a surrogate, don’t think it’s right on here. Offering women money to have his kid. It’s making a joke of the site. Giving blokes a bad name. No wonder the women are half afraid to reply they think we’re all tapped! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just a heads up about your man on here looking for a surrogate, don’t think it’s right on here. Offering women money to have his kid. It’s making a joke of the site. Giving blokes a bad name. No wonder the women are half afraid to reply they think we’re all tapped! "
Which bloke? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Wanttobeadad is the username like it’s a joke. Ain’t right. Why isn’t he on a site looking for surrogates! Weird it is. I reported it. Making a joke of the place he is "
That's weird. I wouldn't let it keep you up though |
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I don't tend to have a problem in getting replies but I only message someone if I think we will have a connection i.e. I decide if we have common interests by looking at their profile.
Send a message that will engage with a person nor just a generic copy and paste " hi wanna fuck" bull shit message
If you don't get a reply oh well... As they say "c'est la vie" and "que sera sera".
Yes that's correct that French and Spanish for tough shit lol
Happy fabing |
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"Does any other guy find it hard to get any responses on here?
What do you guys put in a first message to make it stand out?
Females what are you looking for to make you reply?
It would be handy if there was some kind of open public forum where you could chat to the females in a non pressured open way to see if you get on with any of them, therefore rendering the message system less important for making contacts."
The chat rooms? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You can't "get females to reply".
There is no magic formula that will work, every lady here is different.
Reading profiles and forum posts help but you are never guaranteed a response. "
Exactly.
You could have the best constructed message ever and a really desciptive profile, but if the person you're messaging isn't interested, then they're not interested. That's life |
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"I don't send preemptive faf messages, when I do mail a lady on here, it's usually something forum related, and sometimes that leads to a bit of flirting and occasionally a meet "
Nothing better than winging it! |
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1) Face pic *(read later).
2) At least a little about yourself and what you're looking for.
3) Something more than single line messages.
4) Some form of verification.
Can't comment for single women or anyone else for that matter but as a couple, we might occasionally invite a single guy to join us so I can only assume the same rules apply. We know how we want to play it and I assume some others are the same.
I'll post some generic rules rather than any targeted specifically at you.
In our case, she want's to see a face pic. Now we get a lot of people wont do that (and it's fine) and it might be attached to the message but even when she's just generally nosing, she wants a reasonable idea of what the person looks like or she want even message to begin with.
The first step is and always will be...does she find you attractive? That's not a judgement on anyone, it's just how it is. A yay or nay before she even starts to talk. Everyone does it and lets not pretend otherwise. We're not everyone's type and everyone is not our type either.
Having a nice photo of yourself is step number one. Even if you don't want to show your face on your profile, at least try putting one up of yourself dressed tidy with your face blurred out. 50 dick pic's, no matter how special you think it is, just ain't gonna cut it.
Second step is be interesting on your profile. Have something we can read about you. What you're looking for, what you enjoy etc. There's nothing worse than getting a message from someone but having no clue what they want from their profile or worse, getting to a meet and finding what you're looking for is the exact opposite of what we are looking for.
Third step is just be polite, respectful and most importantly, keep the conversation going. Single guy accounts absolutely swamp this site and when a message is just "fancy a fuck" you've got no chance. Just go at the appropriate pace for the conversation and don't try to cajole a meet. Just wait for us to invite you. If we are continuing to talk to you, you're already half way there.
Forth step is just be verified at some level. We all have camera phones these days and plenty have webcams. It's not hard to at least photo verify yourself and/or pop into a chat room, stick on a web cam and ask someone to verify you. Everyone has to start somewhere. If you're completely unverified however, it's a good chance the cast majority wont allow you to contact them anyway. There are far far far to many faker wannabe accounts on fab so get a bit of green on there if you want to be taken seriously.
Lastly..just don't expect things to go your way. You might not ever get reply. IF that's the case, just move on and try again. Like I said, there are so many single guy accounts and so few single fem accounts (at least in our local region by comparison) you're going to have a lot of competition.
There is no way to always get a response or meet. There is no guarantee you'll even click on meet to go to the next level. This happens to all account types. Single guy accounts just happen to have the worse odds in this situation.
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