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Meets where the Man cant get Hard
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hear alot that couples will have meets where the guy turns up ...and usually can get or stay hard . Must admit it happens to me now n again . Now sure if its nerves or personal life stress at the time .
...is it common ??
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have had one guy who shot soon as he put his dick inside and never managed to get it up again wife tried everything to no avail. She was nice to him never put him down in any way and I took over where he left off. Think he felt worse than the wife did never went back though |
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Had it once in my early days of swinging. Before I started doing socials first.
There was no attraction and the couple had a list of no goes that were sprung on me during the meet.
It felt more clinical and there was no enjoyment and yeah. No show downstairs.
I apologized, got a lot of verbal abuse and left.
Now I social meet first. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Had it once in my early days of swinging. Before I started doing socials first.
There was no attraction and the couple had a list of no goes that were sprung on me during the meet.
It felt more clinical and there was no enjoyment and yeah. No show downstairs.
I apologized, got a lot of verbal abuse and left.
Now I social meet first. "
No need for the verbal abuse these things happen and nerves are to be expected sometimes |
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"Had it once in my early days of swinging. Before I started doing socials first.
There was no attraction and the couple had a list of no goes that were sprung on me during the meet.
It felt more clinical and there was no enjoyment and yeah. No show downstairs.
I apologized, got a lot of verbal abuse and left.
Now I social meet first.
No need for the verbal abuse these things happen and nerves are to be expected sometimes "
No it didn't do my confidence much good but thankfully a good support network of friends and a neighbour with benefits helped. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some guys feel pressured or nervous and, especially if meeting through here, feel that they need to perform exceptionally
Others go soft at the thought of or site of a condom
Others struggle with another guy in the room
These things can all add up to the reality being much, much different to the fantasy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This is one thing I'm bothered about. Never done swinging before, will I be able to perform on the day when it counts? Not had sex in so long I'd like to think I'm ready for it, but there's still part of me that'll be nervous as fuck and that message might get through to my little man and fuck the whole night up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm easily influenced by vibe and body language.
If I'm not sure I 'get' the person.
If I'm not sure I'm attracted.
Pressure.
Nerves.
Past experience.
Thinking.
Analysing.
Having sex with people is when many of us are at our most vulnerable.. With men that sometimes manifests itself in a floppy. I sometimes get a random one as I'm about to have sex with someone new. Because there are too many new things to focus on.. and my mind gets a bit distracted.
So I usually mention it may happen, but not to worry, kisses are my reset button. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes had a meet where guy struggled to stay erect but didn't make a big thing of it, it happens so we just played till he got hard then fucked, it was over quick but not his fault or mine |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive lost my erection part way through a meet, just happened. Tiredness, elevated stress levels all have an effect. I'm not a machine, just have a rest, do something else and hope it returns. |
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Not ashamed to admit it's happened to me.
Been in a couple of situations where couldn't get hard even though the situation was very sexy and the women where both hot. Couldn't get hard.
Then again another time hard as a rock but just couldn't cum.
It will come good eventually! |
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By *arkb73Man
over a year ago
Cheshire/Staffs |
"Not ashamed to admit it's happened to me.
Been in a couple of situations where couldn't get hard even though the situation was very sexy and the women where both hot. Couldn't get hard.
Then again another time hard as a rock but just couldn't cum.
It will come good eventually!"
I’ve been afflicted with the can’t cum syndrome! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not ashamed to admit it's happened to me.
Been in a couple of situations where couldn't get hard even though the situation was very sexy and the women where both hot. Couldn't get hard.
Then again another time hard as a rock but just couldn't cum.
It will come good eventually!
I’ve been afflicted with the can’t cum syndrome! "
I've suffered the can't cum syndrome, but I made sure the woman went home happy after she came multiple times. I had a wank later and sorted myself out |
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By *arkb73Man
over a year ago
Cheshire/Staffs |
"Not ashamed to admit it's happened to me.
Been in a couple of situations where couldn't get hard even though the situation was very sexy and the women where both hot. Couldn't get hard.
Then again another time hard as a rock but just couldn't cum.
It will come good eventually!
I’ve been afflicted with the can’t cum syndrome!
I've suffered the can't cum syndrome, but I made sure the woman went home happy after she came multiple times. I had a wank later and sorted myself out"
Oh yes, sounds very familiar! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"hear alot that couples will have meets where the guy turns up ...and usually can get or stay hard . Must admit it happens to me now n again . Now sure if its nerves or personal life stress at the time .
...is it common ??
"
couple of typos there making it difficult to answer lol |
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"Had it once in my early days of swinging. Before I started doing socials first.
There was no attraction and the couple had a list of no goes that were sprung on me during the meet.
It felt more clinical and there was no enjoyment and yeah. No show downstairs.
I apologized, got a lot of verbal abuse and left.
Now I social meet first. "
Same happened to ne a few weels back . Was put on the spot to play really with no attraction there from me . I prefer socials now |
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"Just take a little blue pill... or even half.
No worries 
Makes me feel ill though - stuffed up nose and headache
Yup not something to be taken Willy nilly so to speak "
I usually have to do two pills  |
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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago
Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro |
"Had it once in my early days of swinging. Before I started doing socials first.
There was no attraction and the couple had a list of no goes that were sprung on me during the meet.
It felt more clinical and there was no enjoyment and yeah. No show downstairs.
I apologized, got a lot of verbal abuse and left.
Now I social meet first.
Same happened to ne a few weels back . Was put on the spot to play really with no attraction there from me . I prefer socials now"
You can say "no"  |
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By *arkb73Man
over a year ago
Cheshire/Staffs |
"Just take a little blue pill... or even half.
No worries
Makes me feel ill though - stuffed up nose and headache
Yup not something to be taken Willy nilly so to speak
I usually have to do two pills "
It’ll kill you and, worse, they won’t be able to shut the coffin lid |
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"Just take a little blue pill... or even half.
No worries
Makes me feel ill though - stuffed up nose and headache
Yup not something to be taken Willy nilly so to speak
I usually have to do two pills
It’ll kill you and, worse, they won’t be able to shut the coffin lid "
Hope that's the case. Difficult to get the lid down. Just get a little apprehensive of ladies who only want "heavy cummers". What's all that about? Never have been, and not likely to start now. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
It's normal. It's disappointing for all involved but it's not the end of the world.
Relax and don't overthink it. Also, don't drink too much to 'manage your nerves' - it really works against you (for most men).
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Just take a little blue pill... or even half.
No worries
Makes me feel ill though - stuffed up nose and headache
Yup not something to be taken Willy nilly so to speak
I usually have to do two pills
It’ll kill you and, worse, they won’t be able to shut the coffin lid
Hope that's the case. Difficult to get the lid down. Just get a little apprehensive of ladies who only want "heavy cummers". What's all that about? Never have been, and not likely to start now. "
I prefer men not to cum at all but if I tell them that they think it's a challenge to cum. |
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By *arkb73Man
over a year ago
Cheshire/Staffs |
"Just take a little blue pill... or even half.
No worries
Makes me feel ill though - stuffed up nose and headache
Yup not something to be taken Willy nilly so to speak
I usually have to do two pills
It’ll kill you and, worse, they won’t be able to shut the coffin lid
Hope that's the case. Difficult to get the lid down. Just get a little apprehensive of ladies who only want "heavy cummers". What's all that about? Never have been, and not likely to start now.
I prefer men not to cum at all but if I tell them that they think it's a challenge to cum. "
I’d cum everywhere just to spite you after paying for a fancy lunch |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Just take a little blue pill... or even half.
No worries
Makes me feel ill though - stuffed up nose and headache
Yup not something to be taken Willy nilly so to speak
I usually have to do two pills
It’ll kill you and, worse, they won’t be able to shut the coffin lid
Hope that's the case. Difficult to get the lid down. Just get a little apprehensive of ladies who only want "heavy cummers". What's all that about? Never have been, and not likely to start now.
I prefer men not to cum at all but if I tell them that they think it's a challenge to cum.
I’d cum everywhere just to spite you after paying for a fancy lunch "
If you'd bought lunch I'd have to change my mind. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a single woman who only meets single guys. A couple of times two different meets ended because of that issue.
Everything was fine. Really well until they put a condom on. Then penis went to sleep!
Took off the condom, gave oral until rock hard then put a different condom on. Dick went to sleep again. After 3 attempts we gave up. I stayed for a chat and cup of tea then left to go home.
I have to be honest and say yes I felt very disappointed. I didn't say that to either of them though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We've hosted a few parties for couples. I can guarantee at every party there's at least one guy who cant get a hard on. We now invite 'spare cocks', single males that we know perform every time. That way none of the ladies are left wanting.
Ben x |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"We've hosted a few parties for couples. I can guarantee at every party there's at least one guy who cant get a hard on. We now invite 'spare cocks', single males that we know perform every time. That way none of the ladies are left wanting.
Ben x"
Could you pop one in the post for me, please?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We've hosted a few parties for couples. I can guarantee at every party there's at least one guy who cant get a hard on. We now invite 'spare cocks', single males that we know perform every time. That way none of the ladies are left wanting.
Ben x
Could you pop one in the post for me, please?
"
No worries. I'll DPd him to you!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have had one guy who shot soon as he put his dick inside and never managed to get it up again wife tried everything to no avail. She was nice to him never put him down in any way and I took over where he left off. Think he felt worse than the wife did never went back though "
Not surprised with that arse  |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"Had it once in my early days of swinging. Before I started doing socials first.
There was no attraction and the couple had a list of no goes that were sprung on me during the meet.
It felt more clinical and there was no enjoyment and yeah. No show downstairs.
I apologized, got a lot of verbal abuse and left.
Now I social meet first.
Same happened to ne a few weels back . Was put on the spot to play really with no attraction there from me . I prefer socials now
You can say "no" "
I've done that (mostly in clubs). Doesn't go down well. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Had it once in my early days of swinging. Before I started doing socials first.
There was no attraction and the couple had a list of no goes that were sprung on me during the meet.
It felt more clinical and there was no enjoyment and yeah. No show downstairs.
I apologized, got a lot of verbal abuse and left.
Now I social meet first.
Same happened to ne a few weels back . Was put on the spot to play really with no attraction there from me . I prefer socials now
You can say "no"
I've done that (mostly in clubs). Doesn't go down well. "
It going down is the whole premise of the thread. |
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"I'm a single woman who only meets single guys. A couple of times two different meets ended because of that issue.
Everything was fine. Really well until they put a condom on. Then penis went to sleep!
Took off the condom, gave oral until rock hard then put a different condom on. Dick went to sleep again. After 3 attempts we gave up. I stayed for a chat and cup of tea then left to go home.
I have to be honest and say yes I felt very disappointed. I didn't say that to either of them though. "
Got to admit its a big thing that aswel . The minute a condom goes on its fucked !! Apparently it could be the whole condom phobia which is common . I get hot sweats now know the moment iv stopped the foreplay that iv got to attempt the condom situation . Could well be my mind is causing the issue . ....see if we meet mines a coffee white no sugars lol |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
Any guy be they from a couple or single guy who has been on the site for a while and had a few meets will most likely have had it happen to them.
It has happened a couple of times to me the first time was at a hotel meet where a security guard followed the four of us as we headed up to their hotel room. I was expecting a knock at the door and that made me edgey and nervous. Of course because I couldn't get hard I started to panic and stress even more which meant it definitely was not going to happen.
i have learnt now to stop forcing it in a situation like that and try something different and more importantly to relax. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a single woman who only meets single guys. A couple of times two different meets ended because of that issue.
Everything was fine. Really well until they put a condom on. Then penis went to sleep!
Took off the condom, gave oral until rock hard then put a different condom on. Dick went to sleep again. After 3 attempts we gave up. I stayed for a chat and cup of tea then left to go home.
I have to be honest and say yes I felt very disappointed. I didn't say that to either of them though.
Got to admit its a big thing that aswel . The minute a condom goes on its fucked !! Apparently it could be the whole condom phobia which is common . I get hot sweats now know the moment iv stopped the foreplay that iv got to attempt the condom situation . Could well be my mind is causing the issue . ....see if we meet mines a coffee white no sugars lol "
I don't accomodate! The tea was made by a previous meet at his apartment.
I don't understand why condoms are such a negative to some men. Surely by meeting for random sex, they would learn how essential condoms are. I wouldn't have sex without using one. |
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"I'm a single woman who only meets single guys. A couple of times two different meets ended because of that issue.
Everything was fine. Really well until they put a condom on. Then penis went to sleep!
Took off the condom, gave oral until rock hard then put a different condom on. Dick went to sleep again. After 3 attempts we gave up. I stayed for a chat and cup of tea then left to go home.
I have to be honest and say yes I felt very disappointed. I didn't say that to either of them though.
Got to admit its a big thing that aswel . The minute a condom goes on its fucked !! Apparently it could be the whole condom phobia which is common . I get hot sweats now know the moment iv stopped the foreplay that iv got to attempt the condom situation . Could well be my mind is causing the issue . ....see if we meet mines a coffee white no sugars lol
I don't accomodate! The tea was made by a previous meet at his apartment.
I don't understand why condoms are such a negative to some men. Surely by meeting for random sex, they would learn how essential condoms are. I wouldn't have sex without using one."
Yes very true ...but its not natural . The feel of it and rolling it on . Think im getting the point i need to retire from swinging soon and get myself into a 'normal' relationship ..that i get my kinks from without the condom in use as we have the trust a woman wants . ....although relationships are easier said than done aye lol |
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"We've hosted a few parties for couples. I can guarantee at every party there's at least one guy who cant get a hard on. We now invite 'spare cocks', single males that we know perform every time. That way none of the ladies are left wanting.
Ben x"
Maybe they just seen you biting the penis ... just saying |
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Many years ago after a bad break up i had issues downstairs, and ended up using the blue pills.
It was stress and the presure to perform so to speak.
Nowadays im fine, its only if a very prolonged session is comimg up (pardon the pun) that the pressure builds up.
Ive never had verbal abuse for non performance, and would think a guy going through that would be horrendous, making the issue worse. I feel for any guy thats been through that. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I'm a single woman who only meets single guys. A couple of times two different meets ended because of that issue.
Everything was fine. Really well until they put a condom on. Then penis went to sleep!
Took off the condom, gave oral until rock hard then put a different condom on. Dick went to sleep again. After 3 attempts we gave up. I stayed for a chat and cup of tea then left to go home.
I have to be honest and say yes I felt very disappointed. I didn't say that to either of them though.
Got to admit its a big thing that aswel . The minute a condom goes on its fucked !! Apparently it could be the whole condom phobia which is common . I get hot sweats now know the moment iv stopped the foreplay that iv got to attempt the condom situation . Could well be my mind is causing the issue . ....see if we meet mines a coffee white no sugars lol
I don't accomodate! The tea was made by a previous meet at his apartment.
I don't understand why condoms are such a negative to some men. Surely by meeting for random sex, they would learn how essential condoms are. I wouldn't have sex without using one.
Yes very true ...but its not natural . The feel of it and rolling it on . Think im getting the point i need to retire from swinging soon and get myself into a 'normal' relationship ..that i get my kinks from without the condom in use as we have the trust a woman wants . ....although relationships are easier said than done aye lol "
You will still have to use condoms early in the relationship, would you?
Try using Skyns and, as Bussy says, get the right size. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Many times years ago and no internet or not widely used men lied re their willy size and ability. This one guy got it up, the first stranger Tej fucked sort of as he went in, Tej said "its gone soft,"! I said to him get it harder and the idiot blamed me for telling him to go into my wifes pussy at the wrong time, so told him to get off and he kised and sucked my wifes tits and kissed her and i fucked her hard as i was much we were much younger then. If we are to meet someone this time i will insit the have viagra no matter what they say |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Many times years ago and no internet or not widely used men lied re their willy size and ability. This one guy got it up, the first stranger Tej fucked sort of as he went in, Tej said "its gone soft,"! I said to him get it harder and the idiot blamed me for telling him to go into my wifes pussy at the wrong time, so told him to get off and he kised and sucked my wifes tits and kissed her and i fucked her hard as i was much we were much younger then. If we are to meet someone this time i will insit the have viagra no matter what they say"
You would INSIST someone takes a serious medication, which has side-effects for some, as part of your meet requirements! Unbelievable.
When don't you seek someone already using Viagra if it's that much of a deal breaker for you?
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"hear alot that couples will have meets where the guy turns up ...and usually can get or stay hard . Must admit it happens to me now n again . Now sure if its nerves or personal life stress at the time .
...is it common ??
"
We always have a social first make sure they guy is relaxed around us and there’s some sexual attraction. We’re a very easy going couple and I enjoy a hard cock, yet half the people we’ve met struggle with getting hard so we’ve given up! Tried clubs in the hope the guys we meet there will have less pressure, as that’s what they’re there for and still the same issues! It’s not like we have a big list of requirements were not an ugly couple we just want safe sex, no anal, no pain or watersports! Still the hunt goes on...
Mrs J  |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"It's happened to me a couple of times. I just assumed it was my fault.
I always assume it’s me! Fab gives you no confidence sometimes! "
I assume it my fault but tell them it's theirs.
Of course I don't. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
If it happens, I ask them to put my ‘Rupert Penry Jones’ mask on. I carry it in my bag for suck emergencies.
Works a treat and before I know it, I am pumping away in them.  |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"If it happens, I ask them to put my ‘Rupert Penry Jones’ mask on. I carry it in my bag for suck emergencies.
Works a treat and before I know it, I am pumping away in them. "
Suck emergencies. 
|
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"If it happens, I ask them to put my ‘Rupert Penry Jones’ mask on. I carry it in my bag for suck emergencies.
Works a treat and before I know it, I am pumping away in them.
Suck emergencies.
"
|
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"It's happened to me a couple of times. I just assumed it was my fault.
I always assume it’s me! Fab gives you no confidence sometimes!
I assume it my fault but tell them it's theirs.
Of course I don't. "
I’m just glad we come as a couple and Mr J practically walks around with a constant hard on so I never go without, I’m just greedy and like two cocks! Only a few have been up to the job though |
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It can happen in relationships, so will happen in meets too. You're not a performing seal, you have natural variations in your abilities to interact with others. I enjoy a kiss and cuddle, so affection is worth it, ig meeting |
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I havnt had any issues with it going soft only with taking too long to cum however thats usually their target to last long and have as much fun possible and one time guy came too soon (wouldnt be an issue if he wouldnt run away straight after). I wouldnt want for a man to feel bad if he goes soft. |
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For those men with issues about condoms try using them while you masturabte. Get used to the feeling of them on.
I hope everyone gets regular testing since no doubt men who always go soft with a condom will be getting sex bareback.
Even if you use condoms should get regular tests too before the bareback Brigade come along bitching about still get stds with condoms why bother wearing them. They reduce chance of getting stds where as bareback you'll get one soon enough. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nerves, general health and fitness at the time, whatever is running through your head. So many factors to cause this. But as someone mentioned previously for me the issue has occurred whenever I don’t know someone and it feels more like an inter_iew! |
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"For those men with issues about condoms try using them while you masturabte. Get used to the feeling of them on.
I hope everyone gets regular testing since no doubt men who always go soft with a condom will be getting sex bareback.
Even if you use condoms should get regular tests too before the bareback Brigade come along bitching about still get stds with condoms why bother wearing them. They reduce chance of getting stds where as bareback you'll get one soon enough."
Wrong !! I dont do bareback on fabs !! Different story if on dates ect but lets be honest swinging is safer i find that a one night stand from some you met jn the pub or a few dates that you get intimate with eventually . I find swinging its the LAW no questions asked use a condom or no play ! Just now n again the condom phobia kicks in . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's happened to me a couple of times. I just assumed it was my fault.
I always assume it’s me! Fab gives you no confidence sometimes!
I assume it my fault but tell them it's theirs.
Of course I don't. "
I didn't tell them it was their fault. I said it was fine and not to worry etc etc. I was dying on the inside but smiling on the outside. |
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"hear alot that couples will have meets where the guy turns up ...and usually can get or stay hard . Must admit it happens to me now n again . Now sure if its nerves or personal life stress at the time .
...is it common ??
"
It happens occasionally people get stressed if you chat and chill out things pop up soon enough.  |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
As with anything about this world ultimately it comes down to all involved being adult about it - just because Mr Floppy pays a visit doesn't have to mean it's game over there are plenty of other things that can be done while he takes a rest.
It's when either the guy gets worked up about it and let's it get to him, or others involved make him feel bad about it that the problems get exacerbated and it becomes game over.
Yes it can be disappointing for all, but there really is not a great deal you can do about it if you're an otherwise fit and healthy guy - it might be nerves, it might be feeling pressurised, it might simply be tiredness or not feeling in the mood or it might be something more deep seated but there really is no rhyme or reason to it in the moment - it happens, and when it does the best thing you can do is try as best you can to ignore it, find other things to do and if it comes back all well and good if not just enjoy the time in other ways. |
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"For those men with issues about condoms try using them while you masturabte. Get used to the feeling of them on.
I hope everyone gets regular testing since no doubt men who always go soft with a condom will be getting sex bareback.
Even if you use condoms should get regular tests too before the bareback Brigade come along bitching about still get stds with condoms why bother wearing them. They reduce chance of getting stds where as bareback you'll get one soon enough.
Wrong !! I dont do bareback on fabs !! Different story if on dates ect but lets be honest swinging is safer i find that a one night stand from some you met jn the pub or a few dates that you get intimate with eventually . I find swinging its the LAW no questions asked use a condom or no play ! Just now n again the condom phobia kicks in . "
I never said you personally
Amount of guys I've met on fab who often get erection issues with condoms ask for bareback and they get told fuck off.
Many have resorted to breaking condoms or pulling them off on purpose.
Which means I have to go get tested 2 weeks later wait a week for test results.
Even guys in their late 40s admitting they've never used a condom. Even though they state safe sex on profile. Even ask them can you remember last time went clinic and some have never been most can't remember when they went last it was that long ago.
So they aint sticking that dick in me even with a condom.
If you're doing one night stand why the fuck wouldn't anyone use a condom it's still sex.
If you're dating you should be getting screened for every new partner before barebacking. Be smart about it
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve had this happen a couple of times with new meets and it did knock my confidence in that I somehow thought it was my fault. However I think on here because it’s a play meet with less of an emotional connection that a date for example there is a certain pressure (on both sides perhaps?) to perform and that’s a shame, plenty of fulfilling fun can be had without penetration |
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