FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Is it really a bad thing?
Is it really a bad thing?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I've noticed a lot on the forums lately about people seeking attention or "look at me" posts (same thing I guess).
People seem to be super offended by anyone who might fit this category...
Now, don't get me wrong, I do find it a little frustrating to watch when every comment a person makes is basically them fishing for a compliment (purely because it makes me sad that they can't see they're great for themselves), but I don't see a problem with wanting attention, least of all here.
Isn't that why we post most of what we post? To get people to notice us? That's why we display pics, right?
What is so bad about it?
Why is is seen as arrogant or desperate to want people to be nice to you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Perhaps it's the volume of people doing it, so much like the constant stream of "help me with my profile" threads from new people, it gets old and grates on people. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Perhaps it's the volume of people doing it, so much like the constant stream of "help me with my profile" threads from new people, it gets old and grates on people."
I get that if they're the same threads over an over it gets boring and samey of course... |
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I think it's how it's done and how it comes across and as mentioned about the frequency maybe...
Of course we all want attention in some way or form it would be nieve to deny it..sometimes you want that big loud "I'm here" thread. I do it occasionally not to be cocky or annoying but usually because I'm feeling playful and flirty that's all...
If people find it annoying in general though they should just pass by the thread.. But at times it can get a bit arrghhh not again haha xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh I am an attention whore, self confessed, even Stevie wonder can see that, but I don’t need it or fish for it to make me feel good as it’s superficial attention anyway, this site is to be taken with a pinch of salt, but all the same I enjoyed being looked at ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Every single poster on a forum is essentially just trying to get noticed, me included.
Attention seeking is the very definition of posting opinions on a public forum.
It’s usually the ones that crave attention the most that ridicule others for doing it so blatantly. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Every single poster on a forum is essentially just trying to get noticed, me included.
Attention seeking is the very definition of posting opinions on a public forum.
It’s usually the ones that crave attention the most that ridicule others for doing it so blatantly."
Quite agree  |
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By *hangerMan
over a year ago
brighton |
Anyone posting pics us primarily doing it to say look at me.
Posting in forums is often again to say look at me, or to air their opinion on a subject.
If you analyse any forum, the threads tend to be repeated time and time again, some more quickly than others.
Ii seems quite simple to me in that if you see a subject that annoys you, then don't bother posting on it. To post on it will just bring it to the top of the forum, thus drawing more attention to it!
Frankly I don't mind if people post "look at me" type threads, as they are easily ignored as is the case with any forum thread! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Anyone posting pics us primarily doing it to say look at me.
Posting in forums is often again to say look at me, or to air their opinion on a subject.
If you analyse any forum, the threads tend to be repeated time and time again, some more quickly than others.
Ii seems quite simple to me in that if you see a subject that annoys you, then don't bother posting on it. To post on it will just bring it to the top of the forum, thus drawing more attention to it!
Frankly I don't mind if people post "look at me" type threads, as they are easily ignored as is the case with any forum thread! "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I will confess 90% of the posts I make are to say 'look at me'
I am a really nice fun guy and I am looking for a meet.
Ok, ok it's 100% of the posts I make   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think people court attention in different ways
This whole site is a ‘look at me’ because that’s the purpose isn’t it ?
Even if you’re not meeting, you’re here for forums and you want your comment to be noticed and read.
There are some who crave it in different ways and the behaviour when they don’t get it resembles something like a petulant child.
Myself - I like knowing I’m attractive to some, but I’m not overly able to meet that often so attention for meets isn’t required here.
Human nature is to be wanted to liked - some require the affirmation more than others |
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"I've noticed a lot on the forums lately about people seeking attention or "look at me" posts (same thing I guess).
People seem to be super offended by anyone who might fit this category...
Now, don't get me wrong, I do find it a little frustrating to watch when every comment a person makes is basically them fishing for a compliment (purely because it makes me sad that they can't see they're great for themselves), but I don't see a problem with wanting attention, least of all here.
Isn't that why we post most of what we post? To get people to notice us? That's why we display pics, right?
What is so bad about it?
Why is is seen as arrogant or desperate to want people to be nice to you? "
I'm not offended by it. I just think that low self esteem is celebrated on fab. People are far more offended by threads in which people say they feel they're good looking, successful and popular. Confidence is not welcome here |
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"I like talking to people. I actually sometimes post strategically in a way that hopefully avoids some types of attention. "
Yep. I never or rarely for instance post on the rate the profile above, what do you really think of me or fuck, kiss, pass threads for that reason. |
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I think there's a difference between confidence and arrogance. It's not always easy to tell which is which. The way it plays out here with the necessity of attention seeking makes it more complicated. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've noticed a lot on the forums lately about people seeking attention or "look at me" posts (same thing I guess).
People seem to be super offended by anyone who might fit this category...
Now, don't get me wrong, I do find it a little frustrating to watch when every comment a person makes is basically them fishing for a compliment (purely because it makes me sad that they can't see they're great for themselves), but I don't see a problem with wanting attention, least of all here.
Isn't that why we post most of what we post? To get people to notice us? That's why we display pics, right?
What is so bad about it?
Why is is seen as arrogant or desperate to want people to be nice to you?
I'm not offended by it. I just think that low self esteem is celebrated on fab. People are far more offended by threads in which people say they feel they're good looking, successful and popular. Confidence is not welcome here"
Oh I quite agree!
God forbid you be confident on here!
Really is a shame. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've noticed a lot on the forums lately about people seeking attention or "look at me" posts (same thing I guess).
People seem to be super offended by anyone who might fit this category...
Now, don't get me wrong, I do find it a little frustrating to watch when every comment a person makes is basically them fishing for a compliment (purely because it makes me sad that they can't see they're great for themselves), but I don't see a problem with wanting attention, least of all here.
Isn't that why we post most of what we post? To get people to notice us? That's why we display pics, right?
What is so bad about it?
Why is is seen as arrogant or desperate to want people to be nice to you?
I'm not offended by it. I just think that low self esteem is celebrated on fab. People are far more offended by threads in which people say they feel they're good looking, successful and popular. Confidence is not welcome here"
Very true |
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"I think there's a difference between confidence and arrogance. It's not always easy to tell which is which. The way it plays out here with the necessity of attention seeking makes it more complicated. "
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance |
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"I think there's a difference between confidence and arrogance. It's not always easy to tell which is which. The way it plays out here with the necessity of attention seeking makes it more complicated.
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance"
Indeed. Or bravado, because I think some "confidence" is faked. Perceived vulnerability is swooped on here, and that can be dangerous.
I think it's a broader cultural issue magnified in this context. |
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"I think there's a difference between confidence and arrogance. It's not always easy to tell which is which. The way it plays out here with the necessity of attention seeking makes it more complicated.
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance
Indeed. Or bravado, because I think some "confidence" is faked. Perceived vulnerability is swooped on here, and that can be dangerous.
I think it's a broader cultural issue magnified in this context. "
Agreed. You expressed that very well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think there's a difference between confidence and arrogance. It's not always easy to tell which is which. The way it plays out here with the necessity of attention seeking makes it more complicated.
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance"
Lots of people seem to be so disillusioned with life that any opportunity to take a side swipe at people who are happy or confident. It's just the green eyed monster alot of the time though!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think there's a difference between confidence and arrogance. It's not always easy to tell which is which. The way it plays out here with the necessity of attention seeking makes it more complicated.
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance
Indeed. Or bravado, because I think some "confidence" is faked. Perceived vulnerability is swooped on here, and that can be dangerous.
I think it's a broader cultural issue magnified in this context.
Agreed. You expressed that very well."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As others have said, I think it's how it's done. If you are putting others down to big yourself up or have an arrogance about it then it just comes across as crass.
Everyone one wants to be noticed and liked so I don't see it as bad think. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance
Never arrogance.
Confidence. Yes a bit of both is good for the soul "
Yes , confidence arrogance love and hate, very thin line between, one I cross often knowingly or not! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As others have said, I think it's how it's done. If you are putting others down to big yourself up or have an arrogance about it then it just comes across as crass.
Everyone one wants to be noticed and liked so I don't see it as bad think. "
so that's what i did wrong |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance
Never arrogance.
Confidence. Yes a bit of both is good for the soul
Yes , confidence arrogance love and hate, very thin line between, one I cross often knowingly or not! "
its just nice to be a cunt from time to time its good for balance |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You have to lead by example being nice goes both ways, liking yourself first helps with inner confidence but being appreciated by others helps people who have low self esteem a compliment in the right place goes a long way, of course their are those who see compliments here as a negative I don't.
People have different opinions about attention seeking but this is a forum where we debate our differences some can debate others take great offence to an opinion that differs from their own but hey ho such is life.
I have no problem with attention seeking and starting threads does lead to attention sometimes in a good way sometimes not, sometimes the wording of the comment leads to annymosity and that was probably never the intention of the Op, some threads lead to the negative reaction just by the nature of the title of the thread but sometimes it's just an ill thought out process  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think there's a difference between confidence and arrogance. It's not always easy to tell which is which. The way it plays out here with the necessity of attention seeking makes it more complicated.
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As others have said, I think it's how it's done. If you are putting others down to big yourself up or have an arrogance about it then it just comes across as crass.
Everyone one wants to be noticed and liked so I don't see it as bad think. "
I agree with this. I think it depends on the person.
I know some who are social media whores. Posting pics a few times a day of everything they do. Some are good people, some are not. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance
Never arrogance.
Confidence. Yes a bit of both is good for the soul "
Arrogance kills the soul ... Confidence makes people take notice, or at least thats what I think it does |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I guess, and this is just my opinion, people want to stand out / get a confidence boost any way they can.
The internet and social media can really affect people.
I guess breaks and technological shut downs for a few hours a day can really go a long way to helping people with their issues. It’s not the sole solution though! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance
Never arrogance.
Confidence. Yes a bit of both is good for the soul
Yes , confidence arrogance love and hate, very thin line between, one I cross often knowingly or not! its just nice to be a cunt from time to time its good for balance"
There u go again using my fav word, and it only balances if uv been a nice Cunt too!! I like nice cunts generally women who have them tho  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
There is but a lot of people think all confidence is arrogance
Never arrogance.
Confidence. Yes a bit of both is good for the soul
Arrogance kills the soul ... Confidence makes people take notice, or at least thats what I think it does "
nooooooooo my soul bounces |
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I’m an attention whore. I know it gets people’s backs up but meh. This is my fab too and I will do what works for me.
Lots of great meets with excellent people that can see through the charade of the forum persona and find the magnificent cock underneath |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You have to lead by example being nice goes both ways, liking yourself first helps with inner confidence but being appreciated by others helps people who have low self esteem a compliment in the right place goes a long way, of course their are those who see compliments here as a negative I don't.
People have different opinions about attention seeking but this is a forum where we debate our differences some can debate others take great offence to an opinion that differs from their own but hey ho such is life.
I have no problem with attention seeking and starting threads does lead to attention sometimes in a good way sometimes not, sometimes the wording of the comment leads to annymosity and that was probably never the intention of the Op, some threads lead to the negative reaction just by the nature of the title of the thread but sometimes it's just an ill thought out process "
the saying " two wrongs don't make a right " comes to mind |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it depends who it is and how and why they do it.
Someone having a wobble and needing a bit of support is generally accepted, someone who looks for it constantly can get a bit grating.
It also depends on the mood/approach of the person reading, sometimes people accuse others of attention seeking whilst slating them publicly and taking over their thread, not all attention seeking comes from an OP. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think there's a difference between confidence and arrogance. It's not always easy to tell which is which. The way it plays out here with the necessity of attention seeking makes it more complicated. "
Agreed. There's a very fine line between confidence and arrogance if someone loves themselves, for me it's very unattractive even if they are fit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've noticed a lot on the forums lately about people seeking attention or "look at me" posts (same thing I guess).
People seem to be super offended by anyone who might fit this category...
Now, don't get me wrong, I do find it a little frustrating to watch when every comment a person makes is basically them fishing for a compliment (purely because it makes me sad that they can't see they're great for themselves), but I don't see a problem with wanting attention, least of all here.
Isn't that why we post most of what we post? To get people to notice us? That's why we display pics, right?
What is so bad about it?
Why is is seen as arrogant or desperate to want people to be nice to you? "
Because many people look down at people acting in a desperate manner and craving attention but then they have as much a right to feel that way as the attention seekers have to shot and wave "look at me". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've noticed a lot on the forums lately about people seeking attention or "look at me" posts (same thing I guess).
People seem to be super offended by anyone who might fit this category...
Now, don't get me wrong, I do find it a little frustrating to watch when every comment a person makes is basically them fishing for a compliment (purely because it makes me sad that they can't see they're great for themselves), but I don't see a problem with wanting attention, least of all here.
Isn't that why we post most of what we post? To get people to notice us? That's why we display pics, right?
What is so bad about it?
Why is is seen as arrogant or desperate to want people to be nice to you? "
I think there's also the fact that some people will just oppose, contradict or argue with anything you say regardless of what you post. I remember making a forum wishing everyone on there own at xmas a happy one and got loads of flack back.
We are all attention seekers in some way. Even those who oppose it and get all shitty are still checking the replies and posting on here for some attention. We're social animals so this is to be expected it's just on here it's rife |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it depends who it is and how and why they do it.
Someone having a wobble and needing a bit of support is generally accepted, someone who looks for it constantly can get a bit grating.
It also depends on the mood/approach of the person reading, sometimes people accuse others of attention seeking whilst slating them publicly and taking over their thread, not all attention seeking comes from an OP. "
True dat!!! |
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