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Sexual expoitation (men)
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I know there is sexually inequality and exploitation and it's been going on forever.
Women aren't the only creatures that suffer from it.
I think few would argue about our biological urge to fuck. That its so strong, many of us end up thinking with our penis instead of our brains.
Theres a whole industry, mainly catered to men. To remove the money from our wallets. Most of it is out in the open, honest transaction, like porn magazines and Escorts.
There are so many under the radar scams.. like penis pumps and penis growth plans. Much like a lot of the diet and lifestyle bullshit we read about on Facebook. Only geared solely towards desperate men. Obvious in its advertising to most, but not the most vulnerable.
I know female friends who sell non-existent spots in a gigalo portfolio advertised in the back of magazines like FHM.
Pay per listen phone calls and video chats that have extortionate hidden pricing.
Strippers clubs with hidden pricing with bouncers who ignore their SIS guidelines.
I wish we had a fully legalised open and transparent sex industry in this country.
A school system that isn't scared of discussing and pushing our children to want to understand this stuff in a healthy way.
For the two to interlink and teach each other.
Maybe that way there wouldn't be so many broken relationships, repressed feelings, desperation and addictions that lead so many down a rabbit hole. To the point people start go take advantage of others vulnerability.
Perhaps a Swingers or sex club in that Universe would be a natural blend of all genders? And a less awkward, uneasy, more comfy place to be?
I've got my Utopian hat on again, can you tell?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the problem remains the inequality between men and women.
It's celebrated and encouraged for women to explore their sexualities in many ways but frowned upon and forced to happen in secret often for men.
Yes there's shaming aimed at both but with men it almost seems more nasty
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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An interesting and definitely an idealised world. I'm intrigued as to how or what you would teach kids to do with regards to this sort of thing.
A world where people don't prey on others 'vulnerabilities' or weakness in any form would be great but the sex industry has been going on for millennia, literally.
Men have always paid for sex, since the advent of money and before that bartered with goats, sheep or (if she was hot) camels. The current situation is just an offshoot of that. Some are taken advantage of, many do so knowingly and for them it's a legitimate release.
Much as I see your point, I don't see how it can change and I also don't think it's necessarily all bad either.
Tea |
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"Women aren't the only creatures who suffer from it."
True - but they suffer from it more than men do; and, sometimes, in truly horrific ways. Men are almost never coerced into having sex for fear of violence; certainly not by women.
Also, if a woman feels forced to turn to prostitution in order to feed and clothe her children, she's not exploiting men; she's desperate.
You're right to want a better world, though.  |
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Interesting OP.
I am not sure what should be taught in schools and at what age. I feel for the teachers and the protesters to be honest at the Birmingham school. Although rent a mob have turned up a part of me says let kids be kids. That's not to hide life from them. I simply cannot reach an opinion. I am torn. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"An interesting and definitely an idealised world. I'm intrigued as to how or what you would teach kids to do with regards to this sort of thing.
A world where people don't prey on others 'vulnerabilities' or weakness in any form would be great but the sex industry has been going on for millennia, literally.
Men have always paid for sex, since the advent of money and before that bartered with goats, sheep or (if she was hot) camels. The current situation is just an offshoot of that. Some are taken advantage of, many do so knowingly and for them it's a legitimate release.
Much as I see your point, I don't see how it can change and I also don't think it's necessarily all bad either.
Tea"
Teach the boys the exact same thing I'd teach the girls. Let youngest kids play freely.. learning to socialise and accept all differences. To manage conflict.. to be unafraid to talk openly about emotions.
If its biological or psychological and proven, and accepted by science and education then it should be on the curriculum at some point in the education spectrum.. not just reserved as a specialist subject.
If the sex industry was less frowned upon and had a code of ethics it subscribed to as a whole. Itd make something we all want.. more attainable and easier. Less painful.
Religion, culture and personal belief shouldn't really have any say in a multifaith, multicultural society in my view. Whilst respected and applauded, it shouldn't have a corrupting influence over education.
A more intelligent, more in touch society, is a kinder society, more open, more accepting society.
I appreciate that wont go down well with everyone, but it's my view and you asked.
As far as specifics go. What to teach at what age.. I'm not qualified, I'm only a parent watching his children and their friends grow up, reflecting on my childhood and knowledge. And thinking about what mine need to know at what age. I'm no idiot, but I'm no expert either.
I'm prepared to bow to the knowledge of someone better qualified to explain a better way. |
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A trite phrase that I don't like using but I can't think of a better way to say it.
Be the change you want to see. None of us can change the world and what you're talking about would take millennia to achieve if it was even possible. However if you can raise open minded, accepting children, they in their turn will do the same. Unfortunately social and peer pressures have influence and some of your good work will be undone but as long as they have a solid base they'll be ok.
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Re teaching in schools there is a fine line, however there does need to be an understanding that just because someone is “different” than you it does not mean it is a big issue or that they are any different as a human being, it’s just their personal choice.
What is taught in school is acceptance of the differences, just like with religion
My lad is fully aware of the different genders out there, that men love men, women love women, some genders love both, men like to dress as women and some genders go through surgery to change from one to the other.
If he asks questions then I will answer them and also correct him if he makes a statement about something.
This is why I was not phased one bit these last couple of days when he was going to meet a family members boyfriend, who is gay but also dresses as he desires and is a drag queen. He just chatted and interacted with him like a human being as it should be |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Women aren't the only creatures who suffer from it.
True - but they suffer from it more than men do; and, sometimes, in truly horrific ways. Men are almost never coerced into having sex for fear of violence; certainly not by women.
Also, if a woman feels forced to turn to prostitution in order to feed and clothe her children, she's not exploiting men; she's desperate.
You're right to want a better world, though. "
Do they though? There are vulnerable, young Male prostitutes or victims who are desperate or drug induced and hooked into it.
Granted there are more female suffering from more graphic examples of exploitation.
Most men on the other hand dont really have the option of turning to sex to make money as an escort voluntarily because.. say.. I love sex and if I could make it my job.. I would. No woman would pay to have sex with me. I'm in need of the extra cash as well!  No I'm not pimpin myself out.. don't PM! Just making a point.
Many more men are exploited financially than women. Over a biological urge.. that fuels exploitation of everyone else.
Maybe teach boys and girls that being a slut, or slag, isn't really such a bad thing? That you should explore your fantasies. That it's ok to touch yourself and others.
Just arm them with the knowledge to do it safely. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mrs here
I would rather the world work more on allowing men to have feelings, men to explore without mockery and men to feel safe learning to talk about what’s on their minds.
Business is business and will always exploit who will pay for what. There’s far more products that prey on women, I mean I’ve never seen ball fresheners like there are sprays for women’s parts. Insecurity in every way for everyone is big business. I think men and women both have shame, in different ways and business will exploit that because that’s capitalism and business. It’s about money. I don’t think men are more targeted or preyed upon in any way except not being free to explore things that are seen as feminine with the same acceptance as when women do. I also think this is changing. I do believe there need to be more conversations about men and their needs without it being a jockey for position of who is treated worse. All the issues matter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You raise great points OP.
Sexual exploitation should be raised in school and made aware about how both sexes are at risk.
If you look at the situation with sugar daddies who are unaware that they are so. Gorgeous women who are with them primarily for their money. If both parties are aware of said fact then all happiness to them. If however the man is a gullible rube with no idea that the girl he is spending money on does not in fact have any feeling for him then that's a case in point. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Maybe teach boys and girls that being a slut, or slag, isn't really such a bad thing? That you should explore your fantasies. That it's ok to touch yourself and others.
Just arm them with the knowledge to do it safely. "
I agree with this bit. I don’t agree that exploitation is balanced between the two sexes. They aren’t comparable as the needs and issues are far too different. Trying to compare them forces a competition of victimisation that causes a battle. Men’s issues are important and deserve a platform without comparison to women’s issues. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Re teaching in schools there is a fine line, however there does need to be an understanding that just because someone is “different” than you it does not mean it is a big issue or that they are any different as a human being, it’s just their personal choice.
What is taught in school is acceptance of the differences, just like with religion
My lad is fully aware of the different genders out there, that men love men, women love women, some genders love both, men like to dress as women and some genders go through surgery to change from one to the other.
If he asks questions then I will answer them and also correct him if he makes a statement about something.
This is why I was not phased one bit these last couple of days when he was going to meet a family members boyfriend, who is gay but also dresses as he desires and is a drag queen. He just chatted and interacted with him like a human being as it should be "
As you and I think it should be. Not everyone else though. Though they forget that the same acceptance that let's us think how we feel.. also gives the acceptance they are granted.
I think a lot of mental health issues arise from people stifling their true selves or losing track of what/who they are.
It's getting much better, especially with younger generations.. and rise of social media. People have the freedom to educate themselves and listen to other views.
I just wish I could make money out of really HELPING people go out and find what they're looking for. Rather than exploiting someone and selling false promises. |
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"Re teaching in schools there is a fine line, however there does need to be an understanding that just because someone is “different” than you it does not mean it is a big issue or that they are any different as a human being, it’s just their personal choice.
What is taught in school is acceptance of the differences, just like with religion
My lad is fully aware of the different genders out there, that men love men, women love women, some genders love both, men like to dress as women and some genders go through surgery to change from one to the other.
If he asks questions then I will answer them and also correct him if he makes a statement about something.
This is why I was not phased one bit these last couple of days when he was going to meet a family members boyfriend, who is gay but also dresses as he desires and is a drag queen. He just chatted and interacted with him like a human being as it should be
As you and I think it should be. Not everyone else though. Though they forget that the same acceptance that let's us think how we feel.. also gives the acceptance they are granted.
I think a lot of mental health issues arise from people stifling their true selves or losing track of what/who they are.
It's getting much better, especially with younger generations.. and rise of social media. People have the freedom to educate themselves and listen to other views.
I just wish I could make money out of really HELPING people go out and find what they're looking for. Rather than exploiting someone and selling false promises. "
Do you blog? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think any of the points you raise above should be discussed in school lessons. "
We cant even discuss LGBT what chance do we have with sex education. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Fab is one of the few exceptions to the rule. One of the only sites I've ever come across that's pretty much free. One I've voluntarily GIVEN money too.. and will probably do again.
It's very educational if you use the forum and pay attention to things.
It gives you the tools to go and find what you want.. for free. That's the society I'd like to live in.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Re teaching in schools there is a fine line, however there does need to be an understanding that just because someone is “different” than you it does not mean it is a big issue or that they are any different as a human being, it’s just their personal choice.
What is taught in school is acceptance of the differences, just like with religion
My lad is fully aware of the different genders out there, that men love men, women love women, some genders love both, men like to dress as women and some genders go through surgery to change from one to the other.
If he asks questions then I will answer them and also correct him if he makes a statement about something.
This is why I was not phased one bit these last couple of days when he was going to meet a family members boyfriend, who is gay but also dresses as he desires and is a drag queen. He just chatted and interacted with him like a human being as it should be
As you and I think it should be. Not everyone else though. Though they forget that the same acceptance that let's us think how we feel.. also gives the acceptance they are granted.
I think a lot of mental health issues arise from people stifling their true selves or losing track of what/who they are.
It's getting much better, especially with younger generations.. and rise of social media. People have the freedom to educate themselves and listen to other views.
I just wish I could make money out of really HELPING people go out and find what they're looking for. Rather than exploiting someone and selling false promises.
Do you blog?"
No. I need other people to bounce off of. I may have confidence person to person. Part of that is knowing your weakness. I need someone giving me a kick up the arse and motivation.. or have an equal share in input. Left to my own devices I'm likely to lose faith in what I'm doing, or procrastinate a bit. I need to collaborate with someone with a different skill set. |
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"Re teaching in schools there is a fine line, however there does need to be an understanding that just because someone is “different” than you it does not mean it is a big issue or that they are any different as a human being, it’s just their personal choice.
What is taught in school is acceptance of the differences, just like with religion
My lad is fully aware of the different genders out there, that men love men, women love women, some genders love both, men like to dress as women and some genders go through surgery to change from one to the other.
If he asks questions then I will answer them and also correct him if he makes a statement about something.
This is why I was not phased one bit these last couple of days when he was going to meet a family members boyfriend, who is gay but also dresses as he desires and is a drag queen. He just chatted and interacted with him like a human being as it should be
As you and I think it should be. Not everyone else though. Though they forget that the same acceptance that let's us think how we feel.. also gives the acceptance they are granted.
I think a lot of mental health issues arise from people stifling their true selves or losing track of what/who they are.
It's getting much better, especially with younger generations.. and rise of social media. People have the freedom to educate themselves and listen to other views.
I just wish I could make money out of really HELPING people go out and find what they're looking for. Rather than exploiting someone and selling false promises.
Do you blog?
No. I need other people to bounce off of. I may have confidence person to person. Part of that is knowing your weakness. I need someone giving me a kick up the arse and motivation.. or have an equal share in input. Left to my own devices I'm likely to lose faith in what I'm doing, or procrastinate a bit. I need to collaborate with someone with a different skill set. "
I understand that very well. Are there bloggers you follow with a similar mind set that you could interact with? You seem to me to have a good connection with a lot of people on fab, is there anyone here who you could team up with? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Re teaching in schools there is a fine line, however there does need to be an understanding that just because someone is “different” than you it does not mean it is a big issue or that they are any different as a human being, it’s just their personal choice.
What is taught in school is acceptance of the differences, just like with religion
My lad is fully aware of the different genders out there, that men love men, women love women, some genders love both, men like to dress as women and some genders go through surgery to change from one to the other.
If he asks questions then I will answer them and also correct him if he makes a statement about something.
This is why I was not phased one bit these last couple of days when he was going to meet a family members boyfriend, who is gay but also dresses as he desires and is a drag queen. He just chatted and interacted with him like a human being as it should be
As you and I think it should be. Not everyone else though. Though they forget that the same acceptance that let's us think how we feel.. also gives the acceptance they are granted.
I think a lot of mental health issues arise from people stifling their true selves or losing track of what/who they are.
It's getting much better, especially with younger generations.. and rise of social media. People have the freedom to educate themselves and listen to other views.
I just wish I could make money out of really HELPING people go out and find what they're looking for. Rather than exploiting someone and selling false promises.
Do you blog?
No. I need other people to bounce off of. I may have confidence person to person. Part of that is knowing your weakness. I need someone giving me a kick up the arse and motivation.. or have an equal share in input. Left to my own devices I'm likely to lose faith in what I'm doing, or procrastinate a bit. I need to collaborate with someone with a different skill set.
I understand that very well. Are there bloggers you follow with a similar mind set that you could interact with? You seem to me to have a good connection with a lot of people on fab, is there anyone here who you could team up with? "
P and I consider it when we're feeling restless. We're close enough to make it work and we come up with outlandish shit that makes you think. Even if we're not always right.
We'd need someone to kickstart us and maintain things on a steady keel. Ideally someone tech and media savvy to help it take off.
To be honest I'd love working with most regular forum users who share a similar outlook and shared vision. I've put up the odd collaboration post and the like but.. i tread carefully, because I dont want to overstep a fab/user/business boundary and advertise a service im ot allowed to accidentally.. such as FabCoaching 1 on 1 for people who are struggling. Not saying I'm a guru and dont mean to sound arrogant.. but I think I could help a few guys out.. maybe a few girls.. by getting to view things from a different perspective.
Fab seems to be the only social media where being me.. works for me. Well Facebook does too.. but it's a bit overly personal with my kids being plastered all over it.
I've considered starting a group on it to advertise such a service.. but if I cant advertise it here.. where do I? Online dating Forums that wont let me do same thing?
Once I start to lose Faith.. I lose interest. Find too many flaws and I'll give up chasing the dream. Hence needing someone/s else to share responsibility, burden, creativity, criticism etc.
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"
Maybe teach boys and girls that being a slut, or slag, isn't really such a bad thing? That you should explore your fantasies. That it's ok to touch yourself and others.
Just arm them with the knowledge to do it safely.
I agree with this bit. I don’t agree that exploitation is balanced between the two sexes. They aren’t comparable as the needs and issues are far too different. Trying to compare them forces a competition of victimisation that causes a battle. Men’s issues are important and deserve a platform without comparison to women’s issues. "
I think this is what I'm uncomfortable about with the title of this thread. Using sex to financially exploit men is immoral and an issue worth addressing but it is not sexual exploitation. |
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"Re teaching in schools there is a fine line, however there does need to be an understanding that just because someone is “different” than you it does not mean it is a big issue or that they are any different as a human being, it’s just their personal choice.
What is taught in school is acceptance of the differences, just like with religion
My lad is fully aware of the different genders out there, that men love men, women love women, some genders love both, men like to dress as women and some genders go through surgery to change from one to the other.
If he asks questions then I will answer them and also correct him if he makes a statement about something.
This is why I was not phased one bit these last couple of days when he was going to meet a family members boyfriend, who is gay but also dresses as he desires and is a drag queen. He just chatted and interacted with him like a human being as it should be
As you and I think it should be. Not everyone else though. Though they forget that the same acceptance that let's us think how we feel.. also gives the acceptance they are granted.
I think a lot of mental health issues arise from people stifling their true selves or losing track of what/who they are.
It's getting much better, especially with younger generations.. and rise of social media. People have the freedom to educate themselves and listen to other views.
I just wish I could make money out of really HELPING people go out and find what they're looking for. Rather than exploiting someone and selling false promises.
Do you blog?
No. I need other people to bounce off of. I may have confidence person to person. Part of that is knowing your weakness. I need someone giving me a kick up the arse and motivation.. or have an equal share in input. Left to my own devices I'm likely to lose faith in what I'm doing, or procrastinate a bit. I need to collaborate with someone with a different skill set.
I understand that very well. Are there bloggers you follow with a similar mind set that you could interact with? You seem to me to have a good connection with a lot of people on fab, is there anyone here who you could team up with?
P and I consider it when we're feeling restless. We're close enough to make it work and we come up with outlandish shit that makes you think. Even if we're not always right.
We'd need someone to kickstart us and maintain things on a steady keel. Ideally someone tech and media savvy to help it take off.
To be honest I'd love working with most regular forum users who share a similar outlook and shared vision. I've put up the odd collaboration post and the like but.. i tread carefully, because I dont want to overstep a fab/user/business boundary and advertise a service im ot allowed to accidentally.. such as FabCoaching 1 on 1 for people who are struggling. Not saying I'm a guru and dont mean to sound arrogant.. but I think I could help a few guys out.. maybe a few girls.. by getting to view things from a different perspective.
Fab seems to be the only social media where being me.. works for me. Well Facebook does too.. but it's a bit overly personal with my kids being plastered all over it.
I've considered starting a group on it to advertise such a service.. but if I cant advertise it here.. where do I? Online dating Forums that wont let me do same thing?
Once I start to lose Faith.. I lose interest. Find too many flaws and I'll give up chasing the dream. Hence needing someone/s else to share responsibility, burden, creativity, criticism etc.
"
You've correctly identified the areas where you could overstep the mark at least.
The problem with labelling anything as a service is that you then set yourself up to fulfil other people's expectations of what that service might mean to them.
I don't know where you can go to do what you describe and if you haven't the impetus to start it yourself I don't know the answer. I think you and I had a similar conversation once before |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Maybe teach boys and girls that being a slut, or slag, isn't really such a bad thing? That you should explore your fantasies. That it's ok to touch yourself and others.
Just arm them with the knowledge to do it safely.
I agree with this bit. I don’t agree that exploitation is balanced between the two sexes. They aren’t comparable as the needs and issues are far too different. Trying to compare them forces a competition of victimisation that causes a battle. Men’s issues are important and deserve a platform without comparison to women’s issues.
I think this is what I'm uncomfortable about with the title of this thread. Using sex to financially exploit men is immoral and an issue worth addressing but it is not sexual exploitation."
depends on which context you put it in doesn't it. Situation dependent? Like I said.. there are male sex workers who go through same stuff as females do. It's not all about money. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Also I'd be wary of thinking you can help people. The ones that want help usually say so on the forum "
yet still get it wrong. Some people learn differently. You're right though.. I do see other flaws in it.. which holds me back from that idea.
Yes we've spoken about it before.. I like that you show interest in it though |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
There is so much to unpack here and I'm not sure my head is in the right space for the conversation.
We have to start earlier than school to get to a utopia that would include an inclusive sexual freedom. That still wouldn't address some people getting less than they want or non. They would have to have been raised to not feel entitled to everything, including sex.
Even without sex as a commodity there would be a marketplace for it as such, with all the accouterments. There would always be vulnerable people and relationships (with or without sex) are complex enough to lead to deliberate and involuntary abuse.
I started a discussion with some people about why women aren't Incels, when many of us are, but without the violence and entitlement. I might think about how to frame that here on another thread.
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"
Maybe teach boys and girls that being a slut, or slag, isn't really such a bad thing? That you should explore your fantasies. That it's ok to touch yourself and others.
Just arm them with the knowledge to do it safely.
I agree with this bit. I don’t agree that exploitation is balanced between the two sexes. They aren’t comparable as the needs and issues are far too different. Trying to compare them forces a competition of victimisation that causes a battle. Men’s issues are important and deserve a platform without comparison to women’s issues.
I think this is what I'm uncomfortable about with the title of this thread. Using sex to financially exploit men is immoral and an issue worth addressing but it is not sexual exploitation.
depends on which context you put it in doesn't it. Situation dependent? Like I said.. there are male sex workers who go through same stuff as females do. It's not all about money."
You wrote the post though? It's a bit odd to write a post about men being exploited out of money and then be frustrated when people respond regarding money. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There is so much to unpack here and I'm not sure my head is in the right space for the conversation.
We have to start earlier than school to get to a utopia that would include an inclusive sexual freedom. That still wouldn't address some people getting less than they want or non. They would have to have been raised to not feel entitled to everything, including sex.
Even without sex as a commodity there would be a marketplace for it as such, with all the accouterments. There would always be vulnerable people and relationships (with or without sex) are complex enough to lead to deliberate and involuntary abuse.
I started a discussion with some people about why women aren't Incels, when many of us are, but without the violence and entitlement. I might think about how to frame that here on another thread.
"
I think yours right and itll probably not happen.. hence utopian cap on. I'm just thinking out loud. |
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This post has gone off on a few tangents, all really interesting.
What I would say about your opening post is that the media and society at large are responsible for making people feel inferior. Whether it be adverts on Facebook for Botox, or weight loss products, or whatever, it’s everywhere, and it’s gets into your psyche. You have to be so strong in your confidence of yourself you don’t get sucked in by it.
With regards to sexual exploitation of men, I’m not sure I know enough about this.
The comments about schools and lessons is an interesting one. I work right next to the school that are protesting in the news in Birmingham, I work closely with that community. I don’t agree that parents can dictate what needs to be taught, nor do I think that Muslims Hindus and Sikhs aren’t gay or trans. I know of a number of Muslim families who have had suicides in the family due to closet homosexuality, and I find that sad. Things are changing with regards to those religions and what’s acceptable, but it’s a slow process. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"An interesting and definitely an idealised world. I'm intrigued as to how or what you would teach kids to do with regards to this sort of thing.
A world where people don't prey on others 'vulnerabilities' or weakness in any form would be great but the sex industry has been going on for millennia, literally.
Men have always paid for sex, since the advent of money and before that bartered with goats, sheep or (if she was hot) camels. The current situation is just an offshoot of that. Some are taken advantage of, many do so knowingly and for them it's a legitimate release.
Much as I see your point, I don't see how it can change and I also don't think it's necessarily all bad either.
Tea"
it has to change if us women want equal rights then it has to go all ways and thats not just male female thats trans and fluid and all the others too |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"This post has gone off on a few tangents, all really interesting.
What I would say about your opening post is that the media and society at large are responsible for making people feel inferior. Whether it be adverts on Facebook for Botox, or weight loss products, or whatever, it’s everywhere, and it’s gets into your psyche. You have to be so strong in your confidence of yourself you don’t get sucked in by it.
With regards to sexual exploitation of men, I’m not sure I know enough about this.
The comments about schools and lessons is an interesting one. I work right next to the school that are protesting in the news in Birmingham, I work closely with that community. I don’t agree that parents can dictate what needs to be taught, nor do I think that Muslims Hindus and Sikhs aren’t gay or trans. I know of a number of Muslim families who have had suicides in the family due to closet homosexuality, and I find that sad. Things are changing with regards to those religions and what’s acceptable, but it’s a slow process."
100% agree and I'm sorry for tangents  |
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"This post has gone off on a few tangents, all really interesting.
What I would say about your opening post is that the media and society at large are responsible for making people feel inferior. Whether it be adverts on Facebook for Botox, or weight loss products, or whatever, it’s everywhere, and it’s gets into your psyche. You have to be so strong in your confidence of yourself you don’t get sucked in by it.
With regards to sexual exploitation of men, I’m not sure I know enough about this.
The comments about schools and lessons is an interesting one. I work right next to the school that are protesting in the news in Birmingham, I work closely with that community. I don’t agree that parents can dictate what needs to be taught, nor do I think that Muslims Hindus and Sikhs aren’t gay or trans. I know of a number of Muslim families who have had suicides in the family due to closet homosexuality, and I find that sad. Things are changing with regards to those religions and what’s acceptable, but it’s a slow process.
100% agree and I'm sorry for tangents "
Tangents are all good, it’s what makes the forum interesting |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"An interesting and definitely an idealised world. I'm intrigued as to how or what you would teach kids to do with regards to this sort of thing.
A world where people don't prey on others 'vulnerabilities' or weakness in any form would be great but the sex industry has been going on for millennia, literally.
Men have always paid for sex, since the advent of money and before that bartered with goats, sheep or (if she was hot) camels. The current situation is just an offshoot of that. Some are taken advantage of, many do so knowingly and for them it's a legitimate release.
Much as I see your point, I don't see how it can change and I also don't think it's necessarily all bad either.
Tea
it has to change if us women want equal rights then it has to go all ways and thats not just male female thats trans and fluid and all the others too"
just a case of treating other people how youd like to be treated. Like all Faith's preach.
Maybe decline in religion in countries like the UK needs something to replace the void the church/mosque/temples and synagogues leave behind. A spritual home for non spiritual masses.. open to all Faith's and those without. To preach the 'be good to each other message', comfort and reassurance.
An life long accessible education system would be a great place to dictate such a philosophy. It only take a few generations to alter a society of people if you start with education. |
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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago
Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro |
"Re teaching in schools there is a fine line, however there does need to be an understanding that just because someone is “different” than you it does not mean it is a big issue or that they are any different as a human being, it’s just their personal choice.
What is taught in school is acceptance of the differences, just like with religion
My lad is fully aware of the different genders out there, that men love men, women love women, some genders love both, men like to dress as women and some genders go through surgery to change from one to the other.
If he asks questions then I will answer them and also correct him if he makes a statement about something.
This is why I was not phased one bit these last couple of days when he was going to meet a family members boyfriend, who is gay but also dresses as he desires and is a drag queen. He just chatted and interacted with him like a human being as it should be
As you and I think it should be. Not everyone else though. Though they forget that the same acceptance that let's us think how we feel.. also gives the acceptance they are granted.
I think a lot of mental health issues arise from people stifling their true selves or losing track of what/who they are.
It's getting much better, especially with younger generations.. and rise of social media. People have the freedom to educate themselves and listen to other views.
I just wish I could make money out of really HELPING people go out and find what they're looking for. Rather than exploiting someone and selling false promises.
Do you blog?
No. I need other people to bounce off of. I may have confidence person to person. Part of that is knowing your weakness. I need someone giving me a kick up the arse and motivation.. or have an equal share in input. Left to my own devices I'm likely to lose faith in what I'm doing, or procrastinate a bit. I need to collaborate with someone with a different skill set.
I understand that very well. Are there bloggers you follow with a similar mind set that you could interact with? You seem to me to have a good connection with a lot of people on fab, is there anyone here who you could team up with?
P and I consider it when we're feeling restless. We're close enough to make it work and we come up with outlandish shit that makes you think. Even if we're not always right.
We'd need someone to kickstart us and maintain things on a steady keel. Ideally someone tech and media savvy to help it take off.
To be honest I'd love working with most regular forum users who share a similar outlook and shared vision. I've put up the odd collaboration post and the like but.. i tread carefully, because I dont want to overstep a fab/user/business boundary and advertise a service im ot allowed to accidentally.. such as FabCoaching 1 on 1 for people who are struggling. Not saying I'm a guru and dont mean to sound arrogant.. but I think I could help a few guys out.. maybe a few girls.. by getting to view things from a different perspective.
Fab seems to be the only social media where being me.. works for me. Well Facebook does too.. but it's a bit overly personal with my kids being plastered all over it.
I've considered starting a group on it to advertise such a service.. but if I cant advertise it here.. where do I? Online dating Forums that wont let me do same thing?
Once I start to lose Faith.. I lose interest. Find too many flaws and I'll give up chasing the dream. Hence needing someone/s else to share responsibility, burden, creativity, criticism etc.
"
If you want to help me out feel free because this place isn't working out for me 
Guru.com |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Re teaching in schools there is a fine line, however there does need to be an understanding that just because someone is “different” than you it does not mean it is a big issue or that they are any different as a human being, it’s just their personal choice.
What is taught in school is acceptance of the differences, just like with religion
My lad is fully aware of the different genders out there, that men love men, women love women, some genders love both, men like to dress as women and some genders go through surgery to change from one to the other.
If he asks questions then I will answer them and also correct him if he makes a statement about something.
This is why I was not phased one bit these last couple of days when he was going to meet a family members boyfriend, who is gay but also dresses as he desires and is a drag queen. He just chatted and interacted with him like a human being as it should be
As you and I think it should be. Not everyone else though. Though they forget that the same acceptance that let's us think how we feel.. also gives the acceptance they are granted.
I think a lot of mental health issues arise from people stifling their true selves or losing track of what/who they are.
It's getting much better, especially with younger generations.. and rise of social media. People have the freedom to educate themselves and listen to other views.
I just wish I could make money out of really HELPING people go out and find what they're looking for. Rather than exploiting someone and selling false promises.
Do you blog?
No. I need other people to bounce off of. I may have confidence person to person. Part of that is knowing your weakness. I need someone giving me a kick up the arse and motivation.. or have an equal share in input. Left to my own devices I'm likely to lose faith in what I'm doing, or procrastinate a bit. I need to collaborate with someone with a different skill set.
I understand that very well. Are there bloggers you follow with a similar mind set that you could interact with? You seem to me to have a good connection with a lot of people on fab, is there anyone here who you could team up with?
P and I consider it when we're feeling restless. We're close enough to make it work and we come up with outlandish shit that makes you think. Even if we're not always right.
We'd need someone to kickstart us and maintain things on a steady keel. Ideally someone tech and media savvy to help it take off.
To be honest I'd love working with most regular forum users who share a similar outlook and shared vision. I've put up the odd collaboration post and the like but.. i tread carefully, because I dont want to overstep a fab/user/business boundary and advertise a service im ot allowed to accidentally.. such as FabCoaching 1 on 1 for people who are struggling. Not saying I'm a guru and dont mean to sound arrogant.. but I think I could help a few guys out.. maybe a few girls.. by getting to view things from a different perspective.
Fab seems to be the only social media where being me.. works for me. Well Facebook does too.. but it's a bit overly personal with my kids being plastered all over it.
I've considered starting a group on it to advertise such a service.. but if I cant advertise it here.. where do I? Online dating Forums that wont let me do same thing?
Once I start to lose Faith.. I lose interest. Find too many flaws and I'll give up chasing the dream. Hence needing someone/s else to share responsibility, burden, creativity, criticism etc.
If you want to help me out feel free because this place isn't working out for me
Guru.com "
Seriously? Tell me what issues you're having in private and I'll do my very best x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"it has to change if us women want equal rights then it has to go all ways and thats not just male female thats trans and fluid and all the others too
just a case of treating other people how youd like to be treated. Like all Faith's preach.
Maybe decline in religion in countries like the UK needs something to replace the void the church/mosque/temples and synagogues leave behind. A spritual home for non spiritual masses.. open to all Faith's and those without. To preach the 'be good to each other message', comfort and reassurance.
An life long accessible education system would be a great place to dictate such a philosophy. It only take a few generations to alter a society of people if you start with education."
i dont need faith to treat people the same its all bullshit and evn more power to those who preach it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Frankly if some men educated themselves with social skills and took better care of their appearance they wouldn't have that problem to start with."
thats a people thing not a male thing ?? some people have major problems with social skills that is not really there fault ?? as for appearance think youll find thats a mine field for all |
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"Frankly if some men educated themselves with social skills and took better care of their appearance they wouldn't have that problem to start with.
thats a people thing not a male thing ?? some people have major problems with social skills that is not really there fault ?? as for appearance think youll find thats a mine field for all"
That's your opion, mine still stands thank you. |
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By *zamiWoman
over a year ago
LONDON |
"I know there is sexually inequality and exploitation and it's been going on forever.
Women aren't the only creatures that suffer from it.
I think few would argue about our biological urge to fuck. That its so strong, many of us end up thinking with our penis instead of our brains.
Theres a whole industry, mainly catered to men. To remove the money from our wallets. Most of it is out in the open, honest transaction, like porn magazines and Escorts.
There are so many under the radar scams.. like penis pumps and penis growth plans. Much like a lot of the diet and lifestyle bullshit we read about on Facebook. Only geared solely towards desperate men. Obvious in its advertising to most, but not the most vulnerable.
I know female friends who sell non-existent spots in a gigalo portfolio advertised in the back of magazines like FHM.
Pay per listen phone calls and video chats that have extortionate hidden pricing.
Strippers clubs with hidden pricing with bouncers who ignore their SIS guidelines.
I wish we had a fully legalised open and transparent sex industry in this country.
A school system that isn't scared of discussing and pushing our children to want to understand this stuff in a healthy way.
For the two to interlink and teach each other.
Maybe that way there wouldn't be so many broken relationships, repressed feelings, desperation and addictions that lead so many down a rabbit hole. To the point people start go take advantage of others vulnerability.
Perhaps a Swingers or sex club in that Universe would be a natural blend of all genders? And a less awkward, uneasy, more comfy place to be?
I've got my Utopian hat on again, can you tell?
I think if you're a woman with a high sex drive. You have a really difficult time. I dunno what the answer is - it is complex !
"
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"An interesting and definitely an idealised world. I'm intrigued as to how or what you would teach kids to do with regards to this sort of thing.
A world where people don't prey on others 'vulnerabilities' or weakness in any form would be great but the sex industry has been going on for millennia, literally.
Men have always paid for sex, since the advent of money and before that bartered with goats, sheep or (if she was hot) camels. The current situation is just an offshoot of that. Some are taken advantage of, many do so knowingly and for them it's a legitimate release.
Much as I see your point, I don't see how it can change and I also don't think it's necessarily all bad either.
Tea
it has to change if us women want equal rights then it has to go all ways and thats not just male female thats trans and fluid and all the others too
just a case of treating other people how youd like to be treated. Like all Faith's preach.
Maybe decline in religion in countries like the UK needs something to replace the void the church/mosque/temples and synagogues leave behind. A spritual home for non spiritual masses.. open to all Faith's and those without. To preach the 'be good to each other message', comfort and reassurance.
An life long accessible education system would be a great place to dictate such a philosophy. It only take a few generations to alter a society of people if you start with education."
Interesting take on it. The religious/moral aspect is always fascinating. I was brought up in a Christian family and my parents are still strong believers. Although I am not a believer myself the message of treating others as you would want be treated is deeply ingrained. I do think this is a moral rather than religious issue at its crux - but surely in trying to create a positive moral message to "fill the gap" left by traditional religions, you are just creating a new system of faith?
I know it varies, but at my kids' primary school they do a lot of work on emotional wellbeing, growth mindset, equity, nurture and the like. It's a world away from what school was like when I was there and I think it must surely have a positive effect in later life - that their generation will be happier to be themselves. We've already seen great change in our lifetimes and I am hopeful this will continue.
Mrs TMN x |
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