FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Men does this site affect your self confidence?
Men does this site affect your self confidence?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So like the headline says. Does the site make you second guess yourself. We are the instigators of the majority of conversations while I’ve had many women message me first I have messaged a lot more and been turned down. I myself just think each to there own but what about the rest of you men |
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By *awk90Man
over a year ago
Amsterdam |
Yeah, I notice after a while of being on here that I feel a bit bad, so I only use this site in small doses at a time.
It's alright though, I just do my best, and take breaks when I feel this site is getting me down. No biggie |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I had a long hard think earlier and usually I don’t think about it. But you know someone who matched everything for me was there beautiful looked intelligent even soecified that. Boom sorry we don’t like black guys. Usually it like each to there own this time though hurt a lot. I never reply after rejection unless it’s ok have a nice day. Each person has preference mine short ginger/blonde brunette pink gold you know any colour hair but mainly causation is my preference but I would never dismiss a different race couloir or sexuality. My profile says straight but I wouldn’t try with a man but tg/ts in transition I class as female |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's just sex not everyone wants what I'm selling "
It’s not though many want to make connections regular fwb or nsa. I’m a confident guy but at first it was like so many turn downs instant deletes you start second guessing yourself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I asked hubby and he said not one bit. This is in addition to our sex life . Suppose it’s different as we are a couple. We dip in and out of this, mainly these days for the forums .. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nope
I am old enough to know myself and accept that my age, looks, sexuality and demeanour will exclude me from the preferences of many
It doesn't mean they don't like me, it just means they wouldn't fuck me
It's really no big deal |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When i first joined yes body confidence was an issue as id been in a long term couple dumbing myself down due to her insecurities but i was funny always tho so women have always been attractable its a gift
Been cocky fucker ever since but with great power comes great resposibility |
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By *uciyassMan
over a year ago
sheffield |
My body is perfect my confidence is shite so I hide under a blonde wig and copious amounts of miss applied make up all the time admiring my pert half naked ass protruding from over sized black lace midi briefs  |
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"So like the headline says. Does the site make you second guess yourself. We are the instigators of the majority of conversations while I’ve had many women message me first I have messaged a lot more and been turned down. I myself just think each to there own but what about the rest of you men "
Yup, to the point I've been considering leaving when my site supporter expires. I pretty much only come here for the forum now. |
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It can go either way.
The good thing about being a couple is you have each other to bolster you back up.
I just hate the crass way some men talk, the lack of respect.
But we talk to some lovely very sexy guys.
Jo x  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm quite philosophical about the place and realise I’m outside most people’s preferences. I enjoy the interaction I have with friends but have come to terms with rarely floating others’ boats sexually. If an opportunity arises it’s a pleasant but very much unexpected surprise |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nah, I know there is a ratio of (and I'm exaggerating here) 300 men to every woman so my messages won't get read. If anything this site is a waste of time and money. Probably delete my account over the weekend. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you're still looking for that one person who will change your life take a look in the mirror.
Nah, I don't take it seriously, let's face the fact it every girl on the road will like you, neither you. Look through the same prism Fab as well, keep try or quit, if you need peace of mind quit, I take it as challenge untill I prove I will not quit |
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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago
mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds |
If and I don't send many messages it gets no response or a thanks but no ta reply.. I tell myself its because I was way out of their league and they were in too much in awe of me to take It further ..try telling yourself that op..  |
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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago
The Land that time forgot (Norfolk) |
The experiences I have gained from being on Fab have helped my confidence massively, they've rebuilt confidence which had previously been eroded over many years. I now feel like myself again  |
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It's sad that it knocks some guys confidence and ideally you all would find out how to be here without that happening. Part of it is the human tendency to compare new experience to what we know - ie compare fab to the real world. In reality your charisma would come across, your sensitivity as well as your confidence and personality and we could find you irresistible - online we don't have that luxury. We might date you, though want something a little different.
It's a pressured system here, that forces choices on us in alien ways to the natural world. Like fine wines etc, some relationships, even if friends or fuckbs, mature well and are best only then. When I'm taking a quick decision, we've not had that luxury. If you have some depth, you may just want to speak and fuck me, whilst also having a meeting of minds, someone who gets you but your street of character and depth can't easily be communicated in just a few interchanges of words. In brief, rejection here is the inadequacy of the system to be like the real work that you will draw conclusions from.
I think it's ideal if you are also meeting people in the wider world for sex simultaneously |
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Im not or ever been naturally confident but i certainly wouldnt let rejection or acceptance get to me . I try keep everything balanced so theres no ego trip if things go well or depression if things go badly. Its taken a while to get to this stage but it works for me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nope, I know I’m no Adonis and there are thousands of men on here who are in better shape and better looking than me so those men are going to get chosen over me. I’m fine with that, it’s a shallow place at the end of the day. Most people are looking for the best sexual encounter they can find with the best looking person they can attract. I’m more looking for that one gal who will blow my socks off, I don’t expect to find her here but I’ll have a bit of a perv and a bit of fun while I’m at it.
Don’t take the site too seriously and remember, the women see a thumbnail photo of you and decide yay or nay in a split second before moving on to reject the next guy. It’s only a game show  |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"Yes.....Cock sizeograph
not well endowed - 15% chance of meeting female
Very well endowed. - 75% chance of meeting female
That's my theory
"
Yeah, you're way off there, most women want average sized. Too big can be very uncomfortable and/or painful. |
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It use to knock my confidence getting ignored more often than not but you have to put things in perspective, with so many guys on here women and couples can be choosy which means they don't need to compromise (not saying guys do or should either) and can have every box ticked if they want. I realise I'm not everyone's cup of tea, slim body, smoker, average looking, if you have a preference for non smoker, toned body or hot as hell then I'm immediately ruled out. That's just how it goes and doesn't make you less of a man, I'd like to think it makes you work harder and put more effort in when contacting people.
A little rejection does lead to thicker skin but sometimes you do need to take a break to evolve so if it is knocking your confidence just step away for a few months and buy a few extra packs of man size tissues. |
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By *TBSMan
over a year ago
close enough |
As I have aged 10 years since first joining fab there has been a slight downturn in confidence possibly but I look at it sensibly.
I did better when I was 38 than (most not all) men when they were 48 and now the roles are reversed,that plus the fact more young men are aware of the site now ergo a bigger pool for females or couple to choose from. What IS interesting is the women whom were 38 when I was are still doing as well (if not better) at 48.
I get less meets now as a common cut off seems to be 45 but the meets I do get are more rewarding.
M |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am honestly a take me as you find me person and if I'm not for you then it's no drama. Tbh honest though, at the start, it bothered me not getting replies. Then I found the forums and realised that women get a lot of messages and there are way more guys than women, so I just plod away now not giving a fook |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When i had a singles profile I would say it did help my confidence.
It’s really hard for single guys on here but managed to get some meets and i was speaking to a few women/couples which was going to lead to meets.
So considering how tough it can be for single guys that gave my confidence a boost.
That being said i had some bad experiences on here that was making me consider deleting my account.
Thankfully Holly wrote me a piece of poetry and we took the plunge together and i am grateful I didn’t delete my account as I couldn’t be happier 
LJ |
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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago
Stockport |
No.
Things within my personal life can knock my confidence, but a forum can't.
I am who I am, if people on the internet don't want to talk to me, dosn't really affect me that much.
(He says not really talking to anyone either haha)
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It dosen't knock my confidence, I just get annoyed when (women in my case) say send messages etc then they delete them without reading.
Or nonwonen look at my profile and it's all bi men lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It dosen't knock my confidence, I just get annoyed when (women in my case) say send messages etc then they delete them without reading.
Or nonwonen look at my profile and it's all bi men lol"
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It dosen't knock my confidence, I just get annoyed when (women in my case) say send messages etc then they delete them without reading.
Or nonwonen look at my profile and it's all bi men lol"
Who was this?
If you come back don’t get annoyed, no one owes ya a reply |
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"So like the headline says. Does the site make you second guess yourself. We are the instigators of the majority of conversations while I’ve had many women message me first I have messaged a lot more and been turned down. I myself just think each to there own but what about the rest of you men "
Not mine x |
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Not really for me. Everyone I think (hope) has good days and bad days. Fab is just a part of life and for me not everything. So don’t let if dictate how I feel as a whole.
There’s some super people here and if they think the same of me then cool and it’s great, if not then that’s fine too |
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Nah, not massively. People want to meet me or don’t. There are tens of thousands of single men on here, many of them more physically attractive than me, able to accommodate etc. But I do okay and if it started to hurt my confidence with rejection then I would leave.
To mitigate the impact on my self-esteem I no longer initiate contact, if people like me, they wink. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes.....Cock sizeograph
not well endowed - 15% chance of meeting female
Very well endowed. - 75% chance of meeting female
That's my theory
"
That’s ridiculous.
There are so many women on here without coco size restrictions.
Maybe you’re just not looking at them. |
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