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Question for the ladies

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No, send better messages

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By *emini ManMan  over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Why would they feel guilty?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"No, send better messages "

Nice tits.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not remotely. Not even a little bit.

Why would I?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "

No, although it is on my profile that if I don't reply, take it as a "thanks but no thanks"

But as we know, not many people read profiles

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"No, send better messages

Nice tits."

Better than YOUR MOMS!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Nope

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By *ollycouple71Couple  over a year ago

manchester

Nope

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/08/19 23:50:36]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I do occasionally lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Nope

My profile clearly states who's wasting their time if they message me - I'm a stubborn bitch - and haven't changed my mind on my no's in the years I've been here

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise. "

I certainly don't feel like that.

I don't owe anyone anything here.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise. "

Yeah, that soon disappears after a few days of trying to answer everyone, after first joining

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Nope

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise.

I certainly don't feel like that.

I don't owe anyone anything here."

Well I do feel that way. We are all human and we all deserve some respect.

Now I know women get bombed with messages, but I couldn't just ignore someone.

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS  over a year ago

doncaster

I do quite often when a guy has sent a long message with pics attached and there's no attraction whatsoever,

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Nope

My profile clearly states who's wasting their time if they message me - I'm a stubborn bitch - and haven't changed my mind on my no's in the years I've been here "

You say that.. But even the ones who fit ur criterie will get ignored. I've seen it so many times on here.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't think females should feel bad. I take the hint and don't message again.

My issue is when their profile is just them moaning about the types of messages they don't want to receive, without giving you much to go on, yet they expect to be sent something 'fab'. Mostly puts me off so I don't bother

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise.

I certainly don't feel like that.

I don't owe anyone anything here.

Well I do feel that way. We are all human and we all deserve some respect.

Now I know women get bombed with messages, but I couldn't just ignore someone.

"

It's not a lack or respect to not respond.

Should I spend hours each day replying to messages from people I've no interest in?

Should I take the time to reply to people who clearly couldn't be fucked reading my profile?

Really boils my piss to be called rude or disrespectful for not spending my life on fab responding to total strangers.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

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By *ophieslutTV/TS  over a year ago

Central

No

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By *emini ManMan  over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise.

I certainly don't feel like that.

I don't owe anyone anything here.

Well I do feel that way. We are all human and we all deserve some respect.

Now I know women get bombed with messages, but I couldn't just ignore someone.

"

Look at it another way - do you feel like a rude disrespectful c**t when you don't respond to emails you receive from Nigerian princes offering you millions? Or flyers from the local pizza company offering a special deal that's of no interest?

Of course you don't - and it's exactly the same principle as sending someone a message on here that they didn't specifically ask *you* to send - so why should people feel that way here?

Yeah when it's someone you've swapped several messages with and have built a connection with it might be different but not a complete stranger sending you an unsolicited message.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise.

I certainly don't feel like that.

I don't owe anyone anything here.

Well I do feel that way. We are all human and we all deserve some respect.

Now I know women get bombed with messages, but I couldn't just ignore someone.

"

It is a way of someone saying no thank you. I'm sure if you were unindated with messages, you would soon realise that it's a thankless task, replying to those you were not interested in. You would spend more time doing that, than investing the time into those you do want to get to know better. It's really not a respect issue. It's in the faq's. It's a persons way of saying they are not interested. It would be handy if there were a butting that could be pressed, whereby a profile could give an automated 'not interested' reply, but until then, this is the next best thing.

Holly

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet"

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Oh and no, i dont feel guilty

Holly

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day. "

What's the point if they aren't interested?

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By *emini ManMan  over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day. "

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

What's the point if they aren't interested? "

So it's all about the pixels then is it?

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By *ophieslutTV/TS  over a year ago

Central


"Nope

My profile clearly states who's wasting their time if they message me - I'm a stubborn bitch - and haven't changed my mind on my no's in the years I've been here

You say that.. But even the ones who fit ur criterie will get ignored. I've seen it so many times on here. "

Being a match on paper, using very basic criteria, does not mean that there is any attraction that would be needed to make something work.

We could walk into a room of 100 men of the exact same age, height, physical characteristics and personality but find none attractive. A sense of entitlement will probably be evident and perceived by some, which will deter.

Single men are prolific here, so we get to find those who may match us, rather than endure those who are unattractive, as if it's our duty as a Handmaid. Those who come with the assumption that we could be desperate,need to use their brains, if this is possible

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By *adeiteWoman  over a year ago

Staffordshire

No, sorry.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Never ceases to amaze me how entitled some people feel!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Nope

My profile clearly states who's wasting their time if they message me - I'm a stubborn bitch - and haven't changed my mind on my no's in the years I've been here

You say that.. But even the ones who fit ur criterie will get ignored. I've seen it so many times on here.

Being a match on paper, using very basic criteria, does not mean that there is any attraction that would be needed to make something work.

We could walk into a room of 100 men of the exact same age, height, physical characteristics and personality but find none attractive. A sense of entitlement will probably be evident and perceived by some, which will deter.

Single men are prolific here, so we get to find those who may match us, rather than endure those who are unattractive, as if it's our duty as a Handmaid. Those who come with the assumption that we could be desperate,need to use their brains, if this is possible "

Exactly. Just because someone says they are attracted to tall, dark haired men, with an athletic body, does not mean they are going to be attracted to every single man who is tall, dark haired and gym fit.

Holly

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By *adylydfordWoman  over a year ago

altinkum

No. The ones i dont reply to are shoddy or have def not read my profile. If i get a nice message who has and i just dont find him attractive i always reply with a thanks but no thanks.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all."

Do you allways walk away from the first knock back in life? Or do you try again?

You allways sound like a yes man. Stop being plastic.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

What's the point if they aren't interested?

So it's all about the pixels then is it? "

If that is code for attraction... For me, yes

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No.

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By *xycpl699Couple  over a year ago

kilmarnock

Never

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise.

I certainly don't feel like that.

I don't owe anyone anything here.

Well I do feel that way. We are all human and we all deserve some respect.

Now I know women get bombed with messages, but I couldn't just ignore someone.

It's not a lack or respect to not respond.

Should I spend hours each day replying to messages from people I've no interest in?

Should I take the time to reply to people who clearly couldn't be fucked reading my profile?

Really boils my piss to be called rude or disrespectful for not spending my life on fab responding to total strangers. "

Should you take the time to reply to people who clearly have read it?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Mrs here-

Nope. Sometimes I try to be polite and it fails.

Sometimes any response even no is construed as an invite to keep messaging

Sometimes people are too rude to warrant a response

Sometimes cut and paste messages that show they’ve not even noticed it’s a couples account puts me off

Sometimes there’s too many messages to have the emotional energy to coddle each person.

I try to be nice but it just takes a lot of energy that I don’t always have.

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By *emini ManMan  over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

Do you allways walk away from the first knock back in life? Or do you try again?

You allways sound like a yes man. Stop being plastic. "

With respect I'm not the one complaining about people not responding to my messages and ignoring the advice given - nothing "yes man" or "plastic" about that - perhaps I have learned what works and is the most positive way to use the site and therefore have absolutely no issues with it - ever considered that?

Based on some of your previous threads and posts I know whose experience of the site I'd rather have

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise. "

I’m ok with being a rude disrespectful cunt

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

Do you allways walk away from the first knock back in life? Or do you try again?

You allways sound like a yes man. Stop being plastic. "

Maybe he is just a decent bloke that thinks harrassing women who don't want to interact with him, is not the done thing?

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By *olden RatioWoman  over a year ago

Buckinghamshire


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "

No, never

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise.

I certainly don't feel like that.

I don't owe anyone anything here.

Well I do feel that way. We are all human and we all deserve some respect.

Now I know women get bombed with messages, but I couldn't just ignore someone.

It's not a lack or respect to not respond.

Should I spend hours each day replying to messages from people I've no interest in?

Should I take the time to reply to people who clearly couldn't be fucked reading my profile?

Really boils my piss to be called rude or disrespectful for not spending my life on fab responding to total strangers.

Should you take the time to reply to people who clearly have read it? "

No. I'm not a service provider.

I'm not here to please others.

I wouldn't have time to respond to everyone, so how would I decide? Then that wouldn't be fair.

Responding so often seems to result in abuse, why would I open myself up to that voluntarily?

No. Fuck that. I don't owe anyone a reply.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

Do you allways walk away from the first knock back in life? Or do you try again?

You allways sound like a yes man. Stop being plastic.

Maybe he is just a decent bloke that thinks harrassing women who don't want to interact with him, is not the done thing? "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Nope, never

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

Do you allways walk away from the first knock back in life? Or do you try again?

You allways sound like a yes man. Stop being plastic.

With respect I'm not the one complaining about people not responding to my messages and ignoring the advice given - nothing "yes man" or "plastic" about that - perhaps I have learned what works and is the most positive way to use the site and therefore have absolutely no issues with it - ever considered that?

Based on some of your previous threads and posts I know whose experience of the site I'd rather have "

Maybe you should consider looking at other forums you commented in

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

Do you allways walk away from the first knock back in life? Or do you try again?

You allways sound like a yes man. Stop being plastic.

Maybe he is just a decent bloke that thinks harrassing women who don't want to interact with him, is not the done thing? "

Or maybe I don't get why people can do what I wouldn't have the cheek to do to others.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

Do you allways walk away from the first knock back in life? Or do you try again?

You allways sound like a yes man. Stop being plastic.

Maybe he is just a decent bloke that thinks harrassing women who don't want to interact with him, is not the done thing?

Or maybe I don't get why people can do what I wouldn't have the cheek to do to others. "

Why can't you just do you and let others do them and not judge them for it?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No word of a lie...actual message received today...

“You have such a beautiful face for me to abuse with my special seed”

I have no photos of my face on my profile!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"No word of a lie...actual message received today...

“You have such a beautiful face for me to abuse with my special seed”

I have no photos of my face on my profile! "

Yes it’s lovely men like this we owe a response to

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

Do you allways walk away from the first knock back in life? Or do you try again?

You allways sound like a yes man. Stop being plastic.

Maybe he is just a decent bloke that thinks harrassing women who don't want to interact with him, is not the done thing?

Or maybe I don't get why people can do what I wouldn't have the cheek to do to others. "

Try getting a female friend to join up and tell her you will deal with all her messages for her.... And to keep trying again after a knock back is a much better way to behave eh? Or is it harassment?!

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By *ackandJill1Couple  over a year ago

Leeds

I see it like this if someone unexpectedly knocked on my front door....I'm busy cooking/in the bath/on the phone or really into a good book do I have to answer it??? No, unexpected knocks take the risk of being unanswered. An invited knock on the other hand would be very rude of me to ignore

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Nope.

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By *irenGuy70Man  over a year ago

Cirencester


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise.

I certainly don't feel like that.

I don't owe anyone anything here.

Well I do feel that way. We are all human and we all deserve some respect.

Now I know women get bombed with messages, but I couldn't just ignore someone.

Look at it another way - do you feel like a rude disrespectful c**t when you don't respond to emails you receive from Nigerian princes offering you millions? Or flyers from the local pizza company offering a special deal that's of no interest?

Of course you don't - and it's exactly the same principle as sending someone a message on here that they didn't specifically ask *you* to send - so why should people feel that way here?"

I totally appreciate that no response means no interest - it's their perogative and that's perfectly fine with me, but those analogies described aren't the same. A) The Nigerian Prince is a scammer, they're just after your money. That's not a real Nigerian Prince sending you the e-mail and B) The flyer is an equivalent of a copy and paste message - they are not targeting you individually, they don't know anything about what you're looking for and is totally speculative. It sounds like the OP was saying that he felt the person he was messaging was a match based on what they were looking for on their profile. Personally, I would reply to anyone that sent me a message if I thought they were sending it to me as an individual, but I also defend people's right to simply ignore if there's no interest.

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By *oisonHoneyWoman  over a year ago

Norwich

You should see the messages that we get, sometimes not responding is the best option, then to say back something rude or nasty

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By *ablo minibar123Woman  over a year ago

.


"occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

Do you allways walk away from the first knock back in life? Or do you try again?

You allways sound like a yes man. Stop being plastic. "

If someone has knocked you back, yet you keep on trying, I would think that makes you seem desperate and harassing to the person you are messaging and could explain why you are getting blocked by some people op.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "

I used to try and be polite and respond to everyone. Unfortunately some guys just can't take the hint at responses saying literally "thanks for messaging me, but I am not interested. Good luck"

They will continue to reply.

I now just delete or ignore messages I don't want to respond too (usually dick pic, "hi babe" or blank avatar)

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "

it’s part of the game

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure if guilty is the word.. But whenever anyone messages me I feel that I have to reply, because I feel like a rude, disrespectable cunt otherwise.

I certainly don't feel like that.

I don't owe anyone anything here.

Well I do feel that way. We are all human and we all deserve some respect.

Now I know women get bombed with messages, but I couldn't just ignore someone.

Look at it another way - do you feel like a rude disrespectful c**t when you don't respond to emails you receive from Nigerian princes offering you millions? Or flyers from the local pizza company offering a special deal that's of no interest?

Of course you don't - and it's exactly the same principle as sending someone a message on here that they didn't specifically ask *you* to send - so why should people feel that way here?

I totally appreciate that no response means no interest - it's their perogative and that's perfectly fine with me, but those analogies described aren't the same. A) The Nigerian Prince is a scammer, they're just after your money. That's not a real Nigerian Prince sending you the e-mail and B) The flyer is an equivalent of a copy and paste message - they are not targeting you individually, they don't know anything about what you're looking for and is totally speculative. It sounds like the OP was saying that he felt the person he was messaging was a match based on what they were looking for on their profile. Personally, I would reply to anyone that sent me a message if I thought they were sending it to me as an individual, but I also defend people's right to simply ignore if there's no interest."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "
not at all as if they are well thought out messages I will reply with a polite no thank you but if they are s*** I take great pleasure in just deleting

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By *ireupthequattroCouple  over a year ago

Stratford

We only reply to messages if we’re intrested , we get loads from people who don’t read our profile , so we just delete and block people who can’t read, same with friends invites , if we don’t know them and they send friends invites we ignor and block. ,

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I've learnt not to reply over the years.

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By *ittlesub4uWoman  over a year ago

Manchester


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "

If someone has gone to a lot of effort to send me a personalised message and really tries to connect but I don’t like them for whatever reason, I reply.

If I replied to every, “hey, how’s you” type message I would honestly have to quit my job to get through my fab admin. I’m pretty confident that’s the case for every single woman on here.

Here’s what the fab admins have to say about it from https://m.fabswingers.com/articles/FAQ#noreply

“It's not rude not to reply.

Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?“

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Nope my profile is clear what I'm looking for. I often just mass delete so don't even open them if I can see from the preview message

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I get what he's saying. As a guy who used to flick through my local FAB list of ladies, spot ones that appealed to me, who's criteria I matched, and then spent good time thinking about what to write based on what she'd written on her profile and her sexual interests, enclosed a face pic with the first message as requested and then posted it off with every hope and anticipation that I've finally found 'the one', and then wait and wait and wait,and keep checking my sent mail to see if she's read it yet, and then....read and deleted.

Start again!! Multiply this over and over and over again...

It gets like climbing a mountain when it's covered in ice and there's an army throwing oil down at you!! It's constant fail try again, fail try again, fail try again...and It's soul destroying and heart breaking. It's like every time you give it your very best effort you're slapped in the face cos it's not good enough.

If you've ever watched Take me Out on TV and see the things the girls reject the guys for...wrong colour socks, don't like his sister or his hobby or his pet dog etc...

I'd be happy to change some of those things for the right girl. No problem. I'm only doing some of them because there's no girl in my life.

So I just pretty much gave up writing and sending messages. If anyone wants to send me any I would gladly reply, but guys pretty much don't get any mail at all, probably because girls fear rejection, please correct me If I'm wrong.

A better concept might be for guys to be banned from sending first messages, girls only, and nobody is allowed to view anyone's profile in stealth mode.

Ladies, when you are interested in a guy how do you let him know?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No they should send better messages

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"No they should send better messages "

How do we know what wpuld be better?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If they send a cock pic they no I dont

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By *SAchickWoman  over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Do you feel guilty for not replying to everyone who answered you on this thread?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If they send a cock pic they no I dont"

I'm sure there's a lot of dickheads messing it up for the decent guys

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I pretty much reply to all my messages but definitely don't even feel bad for the ones that I do just delete ... to flip it around, I wonder if the guys that write the bad messages feel guilty? How I view them is that you can't be vile on here without having it within you in the first place.

Everyone else I reply to basically out of common decency.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/08/19 07:03:40]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Do you feel guilty for not replying to everyone who answered you on this thread?

Who me? I'm to but have to him to work very shortly. But will be back later"

No, the OP

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I've learnt not to reply over the years."

This is it. Replying doesn't do any good.

You might think it rude. So do the people who yell at me in the street, whether it be about my arse or my need to find God. I'm just protecting myself.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If they send a cock pic they no I dont

I'm sure there's a lot of dickheads messing it up for the decent guys"

Well we all have our preferences

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If they send a cock pic they no I dont

I'm sure there's a lot of dickheads messing it up for the decent guys"

Nobody messes it up for anyone else. The only person you mess things up for, is yourself. How other people interact with me doesn’t affect how I view the men on fab.

I wish people would realise this, and stop blaming others

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't feel bad at all. I delete every message I get that doesn't use the specified word as the subject. It helps me see at a glance who has bothered to read my profile before messaging.

That gets rid of about 8/10 messages I get, I read the rest and look at their profiles to see if we're on the same page and if I'm attracted to them. If not, I'll delete- otherwise I reply.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "

No

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "

You total wind up merchant same faces, same responses. Well played, sir.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS  over a year ago

Central

Op - have you learned some things here upon our preferences, including why many messages don't get a reply from us, such that you understand more people and the site rules of no reply = no interest and can modify your expectations? How will you be different over this in future?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I used to try to answer them all but dont now and yes sometimes feel guilty

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "
nope

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Do you feel guilty for not replying to everyone who answered you on this thread?"

Good question!

These responses are far more tailored to you than any messages would be and they're speaking directly to you, so do you?

Tea

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

They made the effort to mail us so we nearly always reply , I would probably feel guilty if I didn't

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "

Not in the slightest. There's usually a reason why I don't. We're not compatible, the sender hasn't read my profile and determined we're a match, the message content is inappropriate for an introduction, and many more.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"They made the effort to mail us so we nearly always reply , I would probably feel guilty if I didn't"

You reply even though you clearly state you're not looking for anything just now?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I always reply... even if it's a no thanks x

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By *LIRTWITHUSCouple  over a year ago

Chester

Nope as will reply to nice messages, but if pics are grim then no

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I used to but not now.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman  over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

When my profile was open yes I did at time's,not enough to always reply though

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

Occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

Do you allways walk away from the first knock back in life? Or do you try again?

You allways sound like a yes man. Stop being plastic.

He actually sounds like a decent guy who know how the site works and tries to give advice to the people who think every woman should spend hours on here replying to guys who they won't meet and have no interest in. You on the other hand put post upon post up giving out about the women on here and then wonder why you don't get messages answered. I know who'd I reply to.

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo


"They made the effort to mail us so we nearly always reply , I would probably feel guilty if I didn't

You reply even though you clearly state you're not looking for anything just now?"

Yes, when we had that we were meeting on it people still mailed even if we didn't match. It doesn't take long to say no thanks

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Occassionally if its a nice message

but replying usually ends up with them trying to convince me to chat/meet

I get you, but we are not all the same.

I've been ignored and blocked for trying to start a conversation with women who haven't given me the time of day.

Yeah everyone's different, but how can people *know* you're not going to be the type that will kick off or get abusive if they say no.

You also need to remember that replying then bypasses any future filters they may choose to set.

As Holly said, no reply is a perfectly acceptable way of saying "thanks but no thanks" here and is even listed in the site FAQs as such.

The sooner guys realise and accept that the easier it will be for all.

"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As others have stated; no reply means not interested, that's the simple answer. There's no guilt involved in not responding to people you have no interest in engaging with.

Even the best thought out message is liable to be deleted with no response if you're not what they're looking for or they don't find you attractive.

Tea

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I get what he's saying. As a guy who used to flick through my local FAB list of ladies, spot ones that appealed to me, who's criteria I matched, and then spent good time thinking about what to write based on what she'd written on her profile and her sexual interests, enclosed a face pic with the first message as requested and then posted it off with every hope and anticipation that I've finally found 'the one', and then wait and wait and wait,and keep checking my sent mail to see if she's read it yet, and then....read and deleted.

Start again!! Multiply this over and over and over again...

It gets like climbing a mountain when it's covered in ice and there's an army throwing oil down at you!! It's constant fail try again, fail try again, fail try again...and It's soul destroying and heart breaking. It's like every time you give it your very best effort you're slapped in the face cos it's not good enough.

If you've ever watched Take me Out on TV and see the things the girls reject the guys for...wrong colour socks, don't like his sister or his hobby or his pet dog etc...

I'd be happy to change some of those things for the right girl. No problem. I'm only doing some of them because there's no girl in my life.

So I just pretty much gave up writing and sending messages. If anyone wants to send me any I would gladly reply, but guys pretty much don't get any mail at all, probably because girls fear rejection, please correct me If I'm wrong.

A better concept might be for guys to be banned from sending first messages, girls only, and nobody is allowed to view anyone's profile in stealth mode.

Ladies, when you are interested in a guy how do you let him know?"

I totally understand why some men get fed up. It must be soul destroying to send decent messages and get nothing back.

I think banning men from mailing would be a great idea. But there is a site like that already. Don't know if it works.

I also think many men *do* spoil it for everyone. When they are abusive it puts women off replying to anyone at all.

Many men latch on to someone who replies and won't leave them alone. Probably because it's the only human response they've had on here, so can't really blame them for that. But it's another reason women don't reply at all.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’d be walking around in a constant state of guilt if I did! Although I must admit, I bulk delete very often and sometimes I ask myself ‘what if?’...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Turn the question round do the guys who send one line rude message like “Are you free for a Fuck today” feel guilty. No wonder lots of woman don’t answer every message

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Turn the question round do the guys who send one line rude message like “Are you free for a Fuck today” feel guilty. No wonder lots of woman don’t answer every message "

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Turn the question round do the guys who send one line rude message like “Are you free for a Fuck today” feel guilty. No wonder lots of woman don’t answer every message "

Or the ones who send initially nice messages and assure you that they're nice guys, not like the other guys, so, so nice, nice on stilts I tell you! And you take a chance and respond, and you're a worthless fat whore and no man will ever take you, know your place, bitch!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I get what he's saying. As a guy who used to flick through my local FAB list of ladies, spot ones that appealed to me, who's criteria I matched, and then spent good time thinking about what to write based on what she'd written on her profile and her sexual interests, enclosed a face pic with the first message as requested and then posted it off with every hope and anticipation that I've finally found 'the one', and then wait and wait and wait,and keep checking my sent mail to see if she's read it yet, and then....read and deleted.

Start again!! Multiply this over and over and over again...

It gets like climbing a mountain when it's covered in ice and there's an army throwing oil down at you!! It's constant fail try again, fail try again, fail try again...and It's soul destroying and heart breaking. It's like every time you give it your very best effort you're slapped in the face cos it's not good enough.

If you've ever watched Take me Out on TV and see the things the girls reject the guys for...wrong colour socks, don't like his sister or his hobby or his pet dog etc...

I'd be happy to change some of those things for the right girl. No problem. I'm only doing some of them because there's no girl in my life.

So I just pretty much gave up writing and sending messages. If anyone wants to send me any I would gladly reply, but guys pretty much don't get any mail at all, probably because girls fear rejection, please correct me If I'm wrong.

A better concept might be for guys to be banned from sending first messages, girls only, and nobody is allowed to view anyone's profile in stealth mode.

Ladies, when you are interested in a guy how do you let him know?

I totally understand why some men get fed up. It must be soul destroying to send decent messages and get nothing back.

I think banning men from mailing would be a great idea. But there is a site like that already. Don't know if it works.

I also think many men *do* spoil it for everyone. When they are abusive it puts women off replying to anyone at all.

Many men latch on to someone who replies and won't leave them alone. Probably because it's the only human response they've had on here, so can't really blame them for that. But it's another reason women don't reply at all."

Thank you x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/08/19 15:02:34]

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 06/08/19 15:02:34]"

I just feel guilty if I dont reply to people.

Even if a woman who I I'm not attracted to at all, messages me il still have the deceny to reply back.

I know women get a lot of messages though and it must be almost impossible to reply to them all. But sometimes it gets to me and I have to rant on about it lol.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I see I've been put on some more block lists now

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I see I've been put on some more block lists now "

I’m sure that’s the disrespectful people who don’t want endless messages with people they’ve no interest in

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My mommas always said

*in the voice of thumper*

"If you don't got something nice to say, then don't say nothin at all"

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I see I've been put on some more block lists now

I’m sure that’s the disrespectful people who don’t want endless messages with people they’ve no interest in "

I didnt message them and I take back what I said earlier. When I wrote this last night, it wasn't a rant, but a question to the ladies of this site.

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman  over a year ago

your imagination

No. I reply to forum mail. Anything else I tend to just delete as they clearly haven't read my profile. Do they feel guilty about ignoring my preferences? Probably not!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"No. I reply to forum mail. Anything else I tend to just delete as they clearly haven't read my profile. Do they feel guilty about ignoring my preferences? Probably not! "

Exactly this

Although I don’t reply to all forum mail. Tends to open up a can of worms if I do. Depends who it is

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not really, it depends on the message

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It’s impossible to reply to all, even a no thanks seems to open up a conversation, I don’t feel bad about not replying now...

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By *xmfrvnMan  over a year ago

Stoke-on-Trent

Apparently the most efficient way to dig a hole is to use a circular pattern, so you're on the right track OP.

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By *nowwhitexxx1Woman  over a year ago

Hull

I do sometimes even though it's impossible to reply to all because I know how fed up everyone gets if you don't reply even me when I get ignored... But sadly its just part of fab x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Zero guilt here. I'm not obliged to reply to a complete stranger to soothe their bruised ego. I don't reply because of two things:

I'm not attracted to you or you haven't bothered to even try and read my profile.

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Do you feel guilty when you don't reply to messages? "

No

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Should I?

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By *eeleyWoman  over a year ago

Dudley


"I see I've been put on some more block lists now

I’m sure that’s the disrespectful people who don’t want endless messages with people they’ve no interest in

I didnt message them and I take back what I said earlier. When I wrote this last night, it wasn't a rant, but a question to the ladies of this site. "

The issue is you keep ranting about the same thing, nobody owes you a response, we are all here for our own reasons and nobody should feel like they have to converse with someone they don't want to.

Oh and no, I don't feel guilty because most messages I get are from people who haven't bothered to read my profile.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I see I've been put on some more block lists now

I’m sure that’s the disrespectful people who don’t want endless messages with people they’ve no interest in

I didnt message them and I take back what I said earlier. When I wrote this last night, it wasn't a rant, but a question to the ladies of this site.

The issue is you keep ranting about the same thing, nobody owes you a response, we are all here for our own reasons and nobody should feel like they have to converse with someone they don't want to.

Oh and no, I don't feel guilty because most messages I get are from people who haven't bothered to read my profile."

I don't keep ranting the same things and how do you know when someone hasn't read your profile

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I see I've been put on some more block lists now

I’m sure that’s the disrespectful people who don’t want endless messages with people they’ve no interest in

I didnt message them and I take back what I said earlier. When I wrote this last night, it wasn't a rant, but a question to the ladies of this site.

The issue is you keep ranting about the same thing, nobody owes you a response, we are all here for our own reasons and nobody should feel like they have to converse with someone they don't want to.

Oh and no, I don't feel guilty because most messages I get are from people who haven't bothered to read my profile."

Or messages are a pile of wank

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