I rarely message anyone I`m attracted to on here, maybe once every month or three (I'm stupidly picky). Even though I send so few, the majority (around 95%) of those are ignored &/or deleted.
A few days ago, I messaged a woman that I liked, she really stood out to me & wasn't a million miles away.
To my amazement, she replied, & thanked me for my message, & said I had a nice profile too, this made my day, obviously, so I messaged back (nothing nasty, pushy, or too eager).
My reply to her has gone unread, & when I`ve checked, she's been on numerous times since I sent it, sometimes for hours.
I`m really gutted, but hey-ho..
Anyway, I was wondering how common this is for the ther men/ I`d imagine most, but hey, maybe I`m one of the men who just come across as Fab-repulsive to most women on here.. |
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"Or maybe she just hasn't read it yet? I often pop on and off, I don't always check my messages. "
Maybe,but she`s been on every time I've checked this evening, & when I checked yesterday, & the evening I sent it.. Going by the deluge of messages most women get daily, I`ll soon "fall off the bottom" of her message list & get kicked under the sofa, if I haven't already.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I actually really do feel for the guys on here.
It can leave you feeling pretty shit about yourself, even if you didn't before you started!"
Maybe send her another message? If she doesn't reply this time just leave it. |
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"Maybe send her another message? If she doesn't reply this time just leave it. "
Nah, feels too awkward to message again, too pushy.. I`m just gonna have to suck it up & hope it`ll be different next time I get my hopes up! |
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"Delete all your sent messages, problem solved.  "
If your someone who messages constantly, playing the numbers game, then yeah, that would work, but, when you message someone once in a blue moon, it doesn't matter if you delete it or not, it stays in your mind.. Or it does me anyway.. |
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So sometimes we'll mark a message unread if we intend to go back to it when we have more time. Also we'll message someone great one day and then we'll forget about them in the sea of messages/real life so we'll appreciate a chaser which reminds us of them!
So it might be worth an 'I enjoyed messaging the other night' follow-up. If she doesn't reply then you're no worse off! |
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My advice is to send her a nice, non pushy message now and then, something that will make her smile but not push for a reply. I get slot of messages and if I'm already talking to a few people I can't take on any more, but at another time I might, so it doesn't hurt to keep trying |
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"So sometimes we'll mark a message unread if we intend to go back to it when we have more time. Also we'll message someone great one day and then we'll forget about them in the sea of messages/real life so we'll appreciate a chaser which reminds us of them!
So it might be worth an 'I enjoyed messaging the other night' follow-up. If she doesn't reply then you're no worse off! "
Mmm.. Interesting.. Thanks for that..
I`m conscious that, one woman's "appreciated chaser reminder", is another woman who`ll see it as too pushy! It's a fine line!
I may well message her back, as you say, what have I got to lose, it's just a case of deciding how long to leave it, so as not to come across as too pushy..
Its a game, eh?   |
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"My advice is to send her a nice, non pushy message now and then, something that will make her smile but not push for a reply. I get slot of messages and if I'm already talking to a few people I can't take on any more, but at another time I might, so it doesn't hurt to keep trying"
Thanks, I think I will (I`m trying to not be too defeatist!) |
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"My advice is to send her a nice, non pushy message now and then, something that will make her smile but not push for a reply. I get slot of messages and if I'm already talking to a few people I can't take on any more, but at another time I might, so it doesn't hurt to keep trying
Thanks, I think I will (I`m trying to not be too defeatist!) "
If I were a guy trying to get a girls attention I'd send her the odd little message with a joke or bit of silly gossip or something interesting in it, something that raises a smile, doesn't put her under pressure and makes you memorable |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My advice is to send her a nice, non pushy message now and then, something that will make her smile but not push for a reply. I get slot of messages and if I'm already talking to a few people I can't take on any more, but at another time I might, so it doesn't hurt to keep trying
Thanks, I think I will (I`m trying to not be too defeatist!)
If I were a guy trying to get a girls attention I'd send her the odd little message with a joke or bit of silly gossip or something interesting in it, something that raises a smile, doesn't put her under pressure and makes you memorable"
I've heard that you were due to be the 6th member of the spice girls, but you were a bit too spicy? |
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"My advice is to send her a nice, non pushy message now and then, something that will make her smile but not push for a reply. I get slot of messages and if I'm already talking to a few people I can't take on any more, but at another time I might, so it doesn't hurt to keep trying
Thanks, I think I will (I`m trying to not be too defeatist!)
If I were a guy trying to get a girls attention I'd send her the odd little message with a joke or bit of silly gossip or something interesting in it, something that raises a smile, doesn't put her under pressure and makes you memorable
I've heard that you were due to be the 6th member of the spice girls, but you were a bit too spicy? "
And they couldn't find an outfit to fit my boobs.. |
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By *obletonMan
over a year ago
A Home Among The Woodland Creatures |
"Maybe,but she`s been on every time I've checked this evening, & when I checked yesterday, & the evening I sent it.. Going by the deluge of messages most women get daily, I`ll soon "fall off the bottom" of her message list & get kicked under the sofa, if I haven't already.."
This has happened to me many times.
But almost as many times a follow up message along the lines of - "I think my last message might have been lost in the deluge" has been met with a "yes I think it was, where were we?"
so don't feel like you're stalking by giving it a try |
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"My advice is to send her a nice, non pushy message now and then, something that will make her smile but not push for a reply. I get slot of messages and if I'm already talking to a few people I can't take on any more, but at another time I might, so it doesn't hurt to keep trying
Thanks, I think I will (I`m trying to not be too defeatist!)
If I were a guy trying to get a girls attention I'd send her the odd little message with a joke or bit of silly gossip or something interesting in it, something that raises a smile, doesn't put her under pressure and makes you memorable"
The initial message I sent her was complimentary & fairly brief (as so many women say they dont want one liners, & neither do they want an essay!), it seemed to work, seeing as I got a reply, my second reply was a bit smile inducing (I hope!) & still fairly brief (but friendly)... Maybe she then got inundated under an avalanche of other messages. I`ve seen how many messages you girls get on an average day, so its easy to get lost in the pile.
I will try again, I`m trying to decide how long to leave it.. |
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"Maybe,but she`s been on every time I've checked this evening, & when I checked yesterday, & the evening I sent it.. Going by the deluge of messages most women get daily, I`ll soon "fall off the bottom" of her message list & get kicked under the sofa, if I haven't already..
This has happened to me many times.
But almost as many times a follow up message along the lines of - "I think my last message might have been lost in the deluge" has been met with a "yes I think it was, where were we?"
so don't feel like you're stalking by giving it a try"
Right, will do, thanks! |
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