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Cheating Swingers

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

The amount messages I get off guys in a couples profile saying things like....Meet me but don't let her know....Or let's have sex but don't verify us....Or Let me come and fuck you but don't tell anyone on here.

I'm sure other females get the same messages.I was just curious on other people's views....Yes this is a swingers/sex site but is it cheating when the man or woman doesn't want his/her partner to know they are meeting others for sex without there knowledge.

Or is it....Well they both signed up for this so it's ok.

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.

It's still cheating.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yes, it’s cheating.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's cheating if their partner hasn't agreed to it. I think swingers who cheat are much worse than non-swinger cheaters.

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By *manaWoman  over a year ago

Basingstoke

Definitely cheating...

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.

Honestly, I don't think being on a swinging site gives a get out of jail free card on you can fuck who you want regardless of if your partner knows about it. You still have trust in a swinging relationship, that trust can still be broken.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's cheating if their partner hasn't agreed to it. I think swingers who cheat are much worse than non-swinger cheaters."

Well that's 80% of the site in the crapper!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think that’s cheating as bad as any. Have an open sex life and still cheat...... jees

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By *lik and PaulCouple  over a year ago

Flagrante


"Honestly, I don't think being on a swinging site gives a get out of jail free card on you can fuck who you want regardless of if your partner knows about it. You still have trust in a swinging relationship, that trust can still be broken. "

Trust is everything in a swinging relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Couldn’t have put it better ????

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Honestly, I don't think being on a swinging site gives a get out of jail free card on you can fuck who you want regardless of if your partner knows about it. You still have trust in a swinging relationship, that trust can still be broken. "

I'd say swinging relationships require more trust

Open relationships more so again

To the outsider, they free the couple of the ties that bind

If anything, those ties actually become tighter

That said, a cheat is a cheat no matter how you dress it up

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I bet quite a few of these 'couples' profiles are actually single guys.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Surely if it’s a couples profile the other party will read messages? I know my hubs reads all our messages

Mrscxxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I totally agree with most the comments so far that it's cheating....I thought I was being prudish when I deleted those messages without a reply....I think there should be a moral code and as soon as you lie or go behind the back of your partner then that's cheating regardless if your on a sex site or not....I'm just glad others see it the way I do as I thought i was being too morally strong on here

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Surely if it’s a couples profile the other party will read messages? I know my hubs reads all our messages

Mrscxxx "

I think a lot will delete the messages that they won't want there partners to see....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Surely if it’s a couples profile the other party will read messages? I know my hubs reads all our messages

Mrscxxx "

Nope, not always

I too have received messages from guys in couples asking the same as the OP

Their partners weren't even aware they were bi, let alone arranging to meet others behind their backs

It's happened twice - and both were verified as couples

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'd rip his cock off and post it to his wife.

I wouldn't really, but I do think it's grim as fuck.

I don't condone cheating in any relationship but I can understand why some do.

In a swinging relationship it would stab that extra bit deeper I would imagine.

It's certainly something that I would struggle to get past.

P

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I totally agree with most the comments so far that it's cheating....I thought I was being prudish when I deleted those messages without a reply....I think there should be a moral code and as soon as you lie or go behind the back of your partner then that's cheating regardless if your on a sex site or not....I'm just glad others see it the way I do as I thought i was being too morally strong on here "

I think everyone has to be responsible for their own actions and decisions. We all need to set our own moral standards too regarding sex with who, when and how. I try not to judge when people say they are married as, going through a separation myself, I realise just how complicated this can be.

On the other hand, I do have reservations about people who have no intentions on leaving their spouse but are fucking for queen and country. I will give them a chance to explain though, if they want to. If not, jog on.

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By *irl1234xxxWoman  over a year ago

Liverpool

I despise cheaters with a passion.

I was cheated on and it still cuts me up 11 years later.

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By *il FiskMan  over a year ago

sefton

If its done behind their backs its cheating! Anything else is just making excuses!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Couldn’t agree more we always meet as a couple I let my wife fuck who ever she fancies but would be devastated if she fucked behind my back. Of course it’s cheating and it sucks

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I totally agree with most the comments so far that it's cheating....I thought I was being prudish when I deleted those messages without a reply....I think there should be a moral code and as soon as you lie or go behind the back of your partner then that's cheating regardless if your on a sex site or not....I'm just glad others see it the way I do as I thought i was being too morally strong on here

I think everyone has to be responsible for their own actions and decisions. We all need to set our own moral standards too regarding sex with who, when and how. I try not to judge when people say they are married as, going through a separation myself, I realise just how complicated this can be.

On the other hand, I do have reservations about people who have no intentions on leaving their spouse but are fucking for queen and country. I will give them a chance to explain though, if they want to. If not, jog on."

I think some explanations are just excuses to suit the one that's cheating....I have asked some why they are asking for sex without there partners knowledge and the excuses are idiotic....Like....I'm like a kid in a sweet shop here....Or your hotter than her....Or she doesn't do this or that....Or we're going though a bad patch act.

I think no matter what it is you should always be truthful and tell your partner what your doing....if you don't that's cheating there's no excuses

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By *UNKIEMan  over a year ago

south east

Being deceitful and meeting behind a partners back is cheating .. whether they are both here or not

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Being deceitful and meeting behind a partners back is cheating .. whether they are both here or not "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm so glad that's one thing I could never do it's physically impossible for me to cheat.....

Hard enough for me to find one woman yet alone a second one

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By *bcums3Couple  over a year ago

lanarkshire

You would think having an open and laid back relationship on here that would be enough and know how lucky they are...dont understand why they would cheat (fem)

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By *UNKIEMan  over a year ago

south east


"You would think having an open and laid back relationship on here that would be enough and know how lucky they are...dont understand why they would cheat (fem) "

I have been here since the stoneage and lost count of the amount of times I've seen or heard it going on ...from both male and female

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By *bcums3Couple  over a year ago

lanarkshire


"You would think having an open and laid back relationship on here that would be enough and know how lucky they are...dont understand why they would cheat (fem)

I have been here since the stoneage and lost count of the amount of times I've seen or heard it going on ...from both male and female "

Just seems pointless to me, and maybe a bit greedy??...can’t imagine how the other person would feel being Ona site like this and still being cheated on

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By *bcums3Couple  over a year ago

lanarkshire


"I totally agree with most the comments so far that it's cheating....I thought I was being prudish when I deleted those messages without a reply....I think there should be a moral code and as soon as you lie or go behind the back of your partner then that's cheating regardless if your on a sex site or not....I'm just glad others see it the way I do as I thought i was being too morally strong on here

I think everyone has to be responsible for their own actions and decisions. We all need to set our own moral standards too regarding sex with who, when and how. I try not to judge when people say they are married as, going through a separation myself, I realise just how complicated this can be.

On the other hand, I do have reservations about people who have no intentions on leaving their spouse but are fucking for queen and country. I will give them a chance to explain though, if they want to. If not, jog on.

I think some explanations are just excuses to suit the one that's cheating....I have asked some why they are asking for sex without there partners knowledge and the excuses are idiotic....Like....I'm like a kid in a sweet shop here....Or your hotter than her....Or she doesn't do this or that....Or we're going though a bad patch act.

I think no matter what it is you should always be truthful and tell your partner what your doing....if you don't that's cheating there's no excuses "

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS  over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port


"The amount messages I get off guys in a couples profile saying things like....Meet me but don't let her know....Or let's have sex but don't verify us....Or Let me come and fuck you but don't tell anyone on here.

I'm sure other females get the same messages.I was just curious on other people's views....Yes this is a swingers/sex site but is it cheating when the man or woman doesn't want his/her partner to know they are meeting others for sex without there knowledge.

Or is it....Well they both signed up for this so it's ok."

It isn't just women that get them, I get them quite often too. I tell them exactly what I think of them. Swinging isn't about deceit and I despise them

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You would think having an open and laid back relationship on here that would be enough and know how lucky they are...dont understand why they would cheat (fem)

I have been here since the stoneage and lost count of the amount of times I've seen or heard it going on ...from both male and female

Just seems pointless to me, and maybe a bit greedy??...can’t imagine how the other person would feel being Ona site like this and still being cheated on "

Like their whole world had collapsed I would imagine.

Taken for an absolute muppet?

I also think they'd struggle to trust again, I know I would.

Cheating to me is maybe a d*unken fumble/snog/fuck in a nightclub that they quite possibly regret. When it's premeditated and messages exchanged, a getting to know each other period etc or meeting someone regularly behind a partners back, well, that's more like an affair no matter what way you slice it or dice it regardless of whether there are feelings involved or not.

P

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By *bcums3Couple  over a year ago

lanarkshire


"You would think having an open and laid back relationship on here that would be enough and know how lucky they are...dont understand why they would cheat (fem)

I have been here since the stoneage and lost count of the amount of times I've seen or heard it going on ...from both male and female

Just seems pointless to me, and maybe a bit greedy??...can’t imagine how the other person would feel being Ona site like this and still being cheated on

Like their whole world had collapsed I would imagine.

Taken for an absolute muppet?

I also think they'd struggle to trust again, I know I would.

Cheating to me is maybe a d*unken fumble/snog/fuck in a nightclub that they quite possibly regret. When it's premeditated and messages exchanged, a getting to know each other period etc or meeting someone regularly behind a partners back, well, that's more like an affair no matter what way you slice it or dice it regardless of whether there are feelings involved or not.

P"

Totally agree

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The question is can you cheat in a CNM dynamic.

During this writing i will refer to CNM or Consensual non-monogamy. I feel this best covers the vast array of openly multiple partner relationships.

CNM can be everything from poly to indeed swinging.

Now to understand where I am coming form lets look at the standard idea of cheating within a relationship.

This is usually when two people have agreed to be sexually exclusive but then engage in sexual relationship while pretending to be monogamous and lying to their partner with active manipulation and/or omission of information.

In multiple partner relationships the definition is extended to all those in a commited relationship dynamics

Now first let me point out a myth about CNM, some people believe that those that go into CNM to maintain have tried monogamous relationships and found themselves cheating repeatedly so decide on a CNM dynamic. I feel that this is a very narrow minded point of view and does not take into account the 10000s of people that lead strong postive CNM relationships.

I will say that there are those in CNM relationships that do cheat, but i was asked how this could be if you are open.

1. "Emotional Cheating”

Cheating does not have to include sex, by talking to someone and forming emotional intimacy, thoughts and feelings with that person but not talking about it to the others within the dynamic is cheating.

Emotional cheating can mean anything from online chatting, texting with no physical contact but lots of emotional connection and maybe even some mutual masturbation, to non-sexual lunch dates, or private intimate conversations.

The other thing about Emotional Cheating is emotional contact breeds longing and frustration, so its more likely those involved will find some way to hook up with each other. This usually entails pretending to be somewhere else, doing something else than what the person is actually doing, and can severely strain the poly code of honesty and communication fostering trust. Mirroring other cheating relationships, hiding and lying are very popular strategies for tricksters of all stripes.

2. "Breaking Sex Agreements Cheating"

Not all cheating in CNM comes in the form of physical or emotional contact, even when you are seeing people within the set boundries yiu can cheat by doing things sexually they know they shouldn’t.

This can include anything from having penetrative sex after agreeing not to, having sex in a specific place that was agreed to be out of bounds (often the couple’s bed or residence), or using a specific position the couple had decided to reserve for their exclusive use.

By breaking the boundries you are realistic cheating.

3. "Having a Partner Who is Cheating"

This is a difficult one, this is where the person in a CNM dynamic will date people who are pretending to be monogamous with a different partner.

Dating a cheater is not exactly cheating, or is it? This is a murky area but if you take the CNM values of honesty and transparency in all you do and you are not living by these principles you could consider yourself as cheating once removed.

4. "Physical Cheating"

This is what the mainstream society sees as the standard cheating idea. You start seeing someone behind the back of your exsisting partners. Or as a swinger you see someone with out your partners knowledge etc.

So as you see its not a simple subject to discuss, and alot is dependant on the boundries that are set at the begining of the CNM or when they have developed, but i feel the answer is simple Yes you can cheat in a CNM dynamic.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You would think having an open and laid back relationship on here that would be enough and know how lucky they are...dont understand why they would cheat (fem)

I have been here since the stoneage and lost count of the amount of times I've seen or heard it going on ...from both male and female

Just seems pointless to me, and maybe a bit greedy??...can’t imagine how the other person would feel being Ona site like this and still being cheated on

Like their whole world had collapsed I would imagine.

Taken for an absolute muppet?

I also think they'd struggle to trust again, I know I would.

Cheating to me is maybe a d*unken fumble/snog/fuck in a nightclub that they quite possibly regret. When it's premeditated and messages exchanged, a getting to know each other period etc or meeting someone regularly behind a partners back, well, that's more like an affair no matter what way you slice it or dice it regardless of whether there are feelings involved or not.

P"

If it's regular or not it's still cheating....I think some people think because they have sex with other people on here with there partners permission then it's not like cheating if they do it without there permission....i.e there sex life isn't just him and her.

I find it very hypocritical as most of the ones that morally cheat are the ones I see in the forums or in just chat saying how in love they are....Or they won't meet alone....Or they won't meet people of a certain age ect....Then you get a message asking for sex without there partners knowledge....I'm usually not in there age preference and I've never spoken to them before....And they want to meet alone....I just think it's morally wrong and it's everyday that I get messages like that and I'm sure others do as well....Some people will say it's just sex and your having sex with other people on here anyway but to me I still see them as cheats as it's lieing to there partners to get sex and that's cheating

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Surely if it’s a couples profile the other party will read messages? I know my hubs reads all our messages

Mrscxxx

I think a lot will delete the messages that they won't want there partners to see.... "

you can delete messages how? Not that I want to of course just didn’t know you could

Mrscxxx

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By *oeofsussexMan  over a year ago

Eastbourne

Sure it’s cheating but... some of the best sex I’ve ever had was with women cheating on their hubbies! They were sexually ravenous and an absolute treat!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Surely if it’s a couples profile the other party will read messages? I know my hubs reads all our messages

Mrscxxx

I think a lot will delete the messages that they won't want there partners to see.... you can delete messages how? Not that I want to of course just didn’t know you could

Mrscxxx "

Press the delete bin message thing in your message

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’m sure it’s been well established now that’s it’s cheating.

Sometimes however, we get a meet request from someone local asking for a meet that night. Well, we have kids so both can’t meet at the drop of a hat but happy to send hubby if he wants to. But that always raises suspicions obviously. Why wouldn’t it? However it is genuine! Xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

MrD

By this time tomorrow this thread will be full of people saying it is perfectly fine to cheat or meet with one of a couple who is cheating on here.

Always seems to happen in these topics. "I can cheat because I get no sex at home" and "I can fuck a married person there partner + kids are not my problem".

Doesnt matter if they are swingers or not, cheaters will be cheaters

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’m sure it’s been well established now that’s it’s cheating.

Sometimes however, we get a meet request from someone local asking for a meet that night. Well, we have kids so both can’t meet at the drop of a hat but happy to send hubby if he wants to. But that always raises suspicions obviously. Why wouldn’t it? However it is genuine! Xx"

That's completely different to someone saying there partner doesn't know....Or not to leave verifications....Sending him or her along does look suspicious but if they prove there partner knows then that isn't cheating is it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’m sure it’s been well established now that’s it’s cheating.

Sometimes however, we get a meet request from someone local asking for a meet that night. Well, we have kids so both can’t meet at the drop of a hat but happy to send hubby if he wants to. But that always raises suspicions obviously. Why wouldn’t it? However it is genuine! Xx

That's completely different to someone saying there partner doesn't know....Or not to leave verifications....Sending him or her along does look suspicious but if they prove there partner knows then that isn't cheating is it "

Not to us no. Although in fairness they most likely wanted the wife than me....

Though I can’t say I’m happy about going alone either! This lifestyle for us is a couple thing. Having sex without her but with permission is just cheating with permission????

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’m sure it’s been well established now that’s it’s cheating.

Sometimes however, we get a meet request from someone local asking for a meet that night. Well, we have kids so both can’t meet at the drop of a hat but happy to send hubby if he wants to. But that always raises suspicions obviously. Why wouldn’t it? However it is genuine! Xx

That's completely different to someone saying there partner doesn't know....Or not to leave verifications....Sending him or her along does look suspicious but if they prove there partner knows then that isn't cheating is it

Not to us no. Although in fairness they most likely wanted the wife than me....

Though I can’t say I’m happy about going alone either! This lifestyle for us is a couple thing. Having sex without her but with permission is just cheating with permission????"

Would you let her go to meets alone?

And the point of this is....are swingers cheating when they try to get meets without there partners knowledge or permission

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’m sure it’s been well established now that’s it’s cheating.

Sometimes however, we get a meet request from someone local asking for a meet that night. Well, we have kids so both can’t meet at the drop of a hat but happy to send hubby if he wants to. But that always raises suspicions obviously. Why wouldn’t it? However it is genuine! Xx

That's completely different to someone saying there partner doesn't know....Or not to leave verifications....Sending him or her along does look suspicious but if they prove there partner knows then that isn't cheating is it

Not to us no. Although in fairness they most likely wanted the wife than me....

Though I can’t say I’m happy about going alone either! This lifestyle for us is a couple thing. Having sex without her but with permission is just cheating with permission????

Would you let her go to meets alone?

And the point of this is....are swingers cheating when they try to get meets without there partners knowledge or permission "

Yeah more than happy for her to do that if she wants too. Though she really doesn’t even though I’ve asked a few times.

Yes, without knowledge is cheating. Now I always say to Mrs S, she can have sex with whoever she wants whenever she wants. But she must always send me a picture of when it’s happening. Though she doesn’t like the sound of it as she feels it’s cheating.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’m sure it’s been well established now that’s it’s cheating.

Sometimes however, we get a meet request from someone local asking for a meet that night. Well, we have kids so both can’t meet at the drop of a hat but happy to send hubby if he wants to. But that always raises suspicions obviously. Why wouldn’t it? However it is genuine! Xx

That's completely different to someone saying there partner doesn't know....Or not to leave verifications....Sending him or her along does look suspicious but if they prove there partner knows then that isn't cheating is it

Not to us no. Although in fairness they most likely wanted the wife than me....

Though I can’t say I’m happy about going alone either! This lifestyle for us is a couple thing. Having sex without her but with permission is just cheating with permission????

Would you let her go to meets alone?

And the point of this is....are swingers cheating when they try to get meets without there partners knowledge or permission

Yeah more than happy for her to do that if she wants too. Though she really doesn’t even though I’ve asked a few times.

Yes, without knowledge is cheating. Now I always say to Mrs S, she can have sex with whoever she wants whenever she wants. But she must always send me a picture of when it’s happening. Though she doesn’t like the sound of it as she feels it’s cheating. "

I'm assuming you mean if she's out and someone takes her fancy to have a spur of the moment shag then send you a photo.

I can understand why she feels like that, the other person probably isn't a swinger either, it feels a bit more like cheating in a "normal" relationship than swinging. Not only are you not doing it together, but it isn't even a prearranged "swinging" meet. However it is not cheating if it is something you agreed on and you are both on the same page.

I think it could cause strain on the relationship of a lot of active swingers on here, while a smaller amount wouldn't even think twice about it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yeah you’re right. I meant it as in she arranged it but I don’t know. Though that’s the same as meeting a one off in a bar.

Pre-arranged and knowing would be great!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Yeah you’re right. I meant it as in she arranged it but I don’t know. Though that’s the same as meeting a one off in a bar.

Pre-arranged and knowing would be great!!"

As long as you are both happy and especially since you seem more keen on it than she is, then I don't see it as cheating in the slightest. Swinging is complete honesty with each other, trying new things and for some people pushing each other they little bit.

You sound like a cuck?

Talk to her more about it, you might agree to give it a try and it might be a little weird the first few times but then when she gets used to the new dynamic she might love it to!

She might not of course but you don't know unless you try

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You would think having an open and laid back relationship on here that would be enough and know how lucky they are...dont understand why they would cheat (fem)

I have been here since the stoneage and lost count of the amount of times I've seen or heard it going on ...from both male and female

Just seems pointless to me, and maybe a bit greedy??...can’t imagine how the other person would feel being Ona site like this and still being cheated on

Like their whole world had collapsed I would imagine.

Taken for an absolute muppet?

I also think they'd struggle to trust again, I know I would.

Cheating to me is maybe a d*unken fumble/snog/fuck in a nightclub that they quite possibly regret. When it's premeditated and messages exchanged, a getting to know each other period etc or meeting someone regularly behind a partners back, well, that's more like an affair no matter what way you slice it or dice it regardless of whether there are feelings involved or not.

P

If it's regular or not it's still cheating....I think some people think because they have sex with other people on here with there partners permission then it's not like cheating if they do it without there permission....i.e there sex life isn't just him and her.

I find it very hypocritical as most of the ones that morally cheat are the ones I see in the forums or in just chat saying how in love they are....Or they won't meet alone....Or they won't meet people of a certain age ect....Then you get a message asking for sex without there partners knowledge....I'm usually not in there age preference and I've never spoken to them before....And they want to meet alone....I just think it's morally wrong and it's everyday that I get messages like that and I'm sure others do as well....Some people will say it's just sex and your having sex with other people on here anyway but to me I still see them as cheats as it's lieing to there partners to get sex and that's cheating "

Absolutely agree with you. I simply meant that in my head if it's premeditated, has taken planning and building a connection then it's more like an affair, which in my mind is worse than say going on a stag night, getting pissed up and fucking a random they met in a club. Both are cheating but the premeditated one wasn't a fleeting lapse in judgement which they possibly regret.

P

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By *SAchickWoman  over a year ago

Hillside desolate

I've never had such a message! But I don't doubt it goes on, and yes if they want to hide it from their partner, it's cheating.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Single profile cheaters are trying to have their cake and eat it.

Couples profile cheaters are asking you to buy the ingredients,.make it, then do the washing up afterwards.

I wonder how many of the people who message "lets keep this between us" are the same virtue posters who say they have no secrets and / or condemn the single and openly cheating?

*Note. This is not an open invitation for a backlash against me for being a cheat.

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By *partharmonyCouple  over a year ago

Ruislip

We saw a TED talk about this recently. The speaker was saying that no matter how permissive a relationship is, the thing which is disallowed is still going to be tempting.

If it goes outside the agreed boundaries of a relationship then it's cheating.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’m sure it’s been well established now that’s it’s cheating.

Sometimes however, we get a meet request from someone local asking for a meet that night. Well, we have kids so both can’t meet at the drop of a hat but happy to send hubby if he wants to. But that always raises suspicions obviously. Why wouldn’t it? However it is genuine! Xx

That's completely different to someone saying there partner doesn't know....Or not to leave verifications....Sending him or her along does look suspicious but if they prove there partner knows then that isn't cheating is it

Not to us no. Although in fairness they most likely wanted the wife than me....

Though I can’t say I’m happy about going alone either! This lifestyle for us is a couple thing. Having sex without her but with permission is just cheating with permission????

Would you let her go to meets alone?

And the point of this is....are swingers cheating when they try to get meets without there partners knowledge or permission

Yeah more than happy for her to do that if she wants too. Though she really doesn’t even though I’ve asked a few times.

Yes, without knowledge is cheating. Now I always say to Mrs S, she can have sex with whoever she wants whenever she wants. But she must always send me a picture of when it’s happening. Though she doesn’t like the sound of it as she feels it’s cheating. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I despise cheaters with a passion.

I was cheated on and it still cuts me up 11 years later. "

Yep, same here.

N x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We all want sex that's why we're here. Get over it. What they don't know doesn't hurt them.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We are all here for the same thing. If you are cheating you can't have a conscience. If someone knows that the other person is married and doesn't bother it's just a bit of fun it's like a game.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The amount messages I get off guys in a couples profile saying things like....Meet me but don't let her know....Or let's have sex but don't verify us....Or Let me come and fuck you but don't tell anyone on here.

I'm sure other females get the same messages.I was just curious on other people's views....Yes this is a swingers/sex site but is it cheating when the man or woman doesn't want his/her partner to know they are meeting others for sex without there knowledge.

Or is it....Well they both signed up for this so it's ok."

lol yes it's still not quite acceptable is it, sign up as a couple but do it on your own but sneakily, I used to see a woman and she met a couple, she liked playing with the woman but the guy of the couple would send messages late of an evening can I pop round she's sleeping etc and she used to let him pop round which made her feel like she was being used,his partner was unaware

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We only ever meet together. Does not compute as to why either of us would cheat. If we want to have sexy with someone else we are open about it. Both of us need to agree, if not we move on. There’s been more than one occasion when one has wanted a meet. It the other, for what ever reason wasn’t feeling it. So we don’t meet. There will be others. Cheating, be it in a swinging relationship or otherwise is abhorrent.

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS  over a year ago

west here ford shire

It’s always cheating

I get the same

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By *otlovefun42Couple  over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...


"The amount messages I get off guys in a couples profile saying things like....Meet me but don't let her know....Or let's have sex but don't verify us....Or Let me come and fuck you but don't tell anyone on here.

I'm sure other females get the same messages.I was just curious on other people's views....Yes this is a swingers/sex site but is it cheating when the man or woman doesn't want his/her partner to know they are meeting others for sex without there knowledge.

Or is it....Well they both signed up for this so it's ok."

My question would be: Have they BOTH really signed up for this?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yeah, it happens a lot, recipe for disaster imo. Swinging is all about trust and being open and honest with your partner, if you don't have that, it's pointless.

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By *uciyassMan  over a year ago

sheffield

I get a lot of messages if the male half of a couple wanting discreet nsa sexi times. I always ask if the partner knows and will she be there and the answer is always no , she’s out shopping or getting her hair done or whatever. They are told two things. I don’t meet men and I do t meet cheaters. Usually I get blocked shortly after.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Honestly, I don't think being on a swinging site gives a get out of jail free card on you can fuck who you want regardless of if your partner knows about it. You still have trust in a swinging relationship, that trust can still be broken.

Trust is everything in a swinging relationship."

That still does not make it right ! You're still abusing a marriage by swinging with another couple no worse than someone going behind the back of their partner?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’m interested to know if anyone gets the same messages from female halves of couples?

Lacey’s been spending a lot of extra time at church lately and I’m beginning to worry that she may not be embroidering Friday and Saturday evenings until 11:30 pm.

My suspicions have been raised after she departed for church at 7:21 pm last Saturday and left her sowing kit at home!

To top it off when I woke Sunday morning and smelled her hair it had a slight aroma of jock strap

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Honestly, I don't think being on a swinging site gives a get out of jail free card on you can fuck who you want regardless of if your partner knows about it. You still have trust in a swinging relationship, that trust can still be broken.

Trust is everything in a swinging relationship.

That still does not make it right ! You're still abusing a marriage by swinging with another couple no worse than someone going behind the back of their partner? "

Yes it’s bloody worse

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I despise cheaters with a passion.

I was cheated on and it still cuts me up 11 years later.

Yep, same here.

N x"

Said with pursed lips

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The amount messages I get off guys in a couples profile saying things like....Meet me but don't let her know....Or let's have sex but don't verify us....Or Let me come and fuck you but don't tell anyone on here.

I'm sure other females get the same messages.I was just curious on other people's views....Yes this is a swingers/sex site but is it cheating when the man or woman doesn't want his/her partner to know they are meeting others for sex without there knowledge.

Or is it....Well they both signed up for this so it's ok.lol yes it's still not quite acceptable is it, sign up as a couple but do it on your own but sneakily, I used to see a woman and she met a couple, she liked playing with the woman but the guy of the couple would send messages late of an evening can I pop round she's sleeping etc and she used to let him pop round which made her feel like she was being used,his partner was unaware "

Why would she let him pop around if she felt used? I just don't get it.

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By *bcums3Couple  over a year ago

lanarkshire

I have had messages directed at me (female) from the male half of couples wanting to meet without any of our partners knowledge...firstly to do that to their unsuspecting partner who thinks they are doing this together is wrong and secondly to just assume I would do the same is even more annoying..for me we came into this lifestyle together we are both very lucky each other trusts enough to do this and we come as a team...I feel for those people who have no idea (men and woman) but it makes no difference when’s it becomes a secret it’s cheating...j x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I have had messages directed at me (female) from the male half of couples wanting to meet without any of our partners knowledge...firstly to do that to their unsuspecting partner who thinks they are doing this together is wrong and secondly to just assume I would do the same is even more annoying..for me we came into this lifestyle together we are both very lucky each other trusts enough to do this and we come as a team...I feel for those people who have no idea (men and woman) but it makes no difference when’s it becomes a secret it’s cheating...j x"

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By *SAchickWoman  over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"Honestly, I don't think being on a swinging site gives a get out of jail free card on you can fuck who you want regardless of if your partner knows about it. You still have trust in a swinging relationship, that trust can still be broken.

Trust is everything in a swinging relationship.

That still does not make it right ! You're still abusing a marriage by swinging with another couple no worse than someone going behind the back of their partner? "

The two things are not comparable

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The amount messages I get off guys in a couples profile saying things like....Meet me but don't let her know....Or let's have sex but don't verify us....Or Let me come and fuck you but don't tell anyone on here.

I'm sure other females get the same messages.I was just curious on other people's views....Yes this is a swingers/sex site but is it cheating when the man or woman doesn't want his/her partner to know they are meeting others for sex without there knowledge.

Or is it....Well they both signed up for this so it's ok.lol yes it's still not quite acceptable is it, sign up as a couple but do it on your own but sneakily, I used to see a woman and she met a couple, she liked playing with the woman but the guy of the couple would send messages late of an evening can I pop round she's sleeping etc and she used to let him pop round which made her feel like she was being used,his partner was unaware

Why would she let him pop around if she felt used? I just don't get it.

"

suppose she felt that she wouldn't see the woman again if she didn't allow it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Listen to the ones in here pretending there monogamous.what a joke.fuck other people but then there exclusive.

I'm afraid to say it's the nature of what goes on here.Im not saying it's acceptable but is any of this but we're here.so don't be shocked when people do it.

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By *ink Panther 123Man  over a year ago

Colnbrook


"It's cheating if their partner hasn't agreed to it. I think swingers who cheat are much worse than non-swinger cheaters."

100% agree with this !

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The amount messages I get off guys in a couples profile saying things like....Meet me but don't let her know....Or let's have sex but don't verify us....Or Let me come and fuck you but don't tell anyone on here.

I'm sure other females get the same messages.I was just curious on other people's views....Yes this is a swingers/sex site but is it cheating when the man or woman doesn't want his/her partner to know they are meeting others for sex without there knowledge.

Or is it....Well they both signed up for this so it's ok."

100% still cheating..if it's done without the other persons knowledge / agreement..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

dontget me wrong its each to their own, what they do is there business and conscious.

but when someone says "im honest"

and you know they are cheating and no remorse and the person is about to give birth for example*

i feel for the innocent party.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's worse than cheating if you have a partner you swing with. You are lying to someone who trusts you, shares your lifestyle choice and deserves honesty if nothing else.

I can understand guys who aren't getting any affection etc at home as I have so many female friends who aren't interested any more. But if you are and you cheat, you're a twonk.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Twice today I've been asked to meet alone by the male half of a couple in here without letting he5 know.Its nearly everyday that gets asked.It happens because they want to try something different and the grass is greener elsewhere.Yre there cheats but ranting about it won't stop it happening

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Twice today I've been asked to meet alone by the male half of a couple in here without letting he5 know.Its nearly everyday that gets asked.It happens because they want to try something different and the grass is greener elsewhere.Yre there cheats but ranting about it won't stop it happening "
lol you're the one telling the tale

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Twice today I've been asked to meet alone by the male half of a couple in here without letting he5 know.Its nearly everyday that gets asked.It happens because they want to try something different and the grass is greener elsewhere.Yre there cheats but ranting about it won't stop it happening lol you're the one telling the tale "

No I'm not I'm just joining in and saying what I see

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's worse than cheating if you have a partner you swing with. You are lying to someone who trusts you, shares your lifestyle choice and deserves honesty if nothing else.

I can understand guys who aren't getting any affection etc at home as I have so many female friends who aren't interested any more. But if you are and you cheat, you're a twonk."

And shows that a lot of people saying they are cheating because they are not getting any at home are also liars. Cheaters are cheaters full stop.

For example, it took a month to finally get a guy to slip up he was lying about cheating. His excuse... Because she won't give him a blowjob

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's worse than cheating if you have a partner you swing with. You are lying to someone who trusts you, shares your lifestyle choice and deserves honesty if nothing else.

I can understand guys who aren't getting any affection etc at home as I have so many female friends who aren't interested any more. But if you are and you cheat, you're a twonk.

And shows that a lot of people saying they are cheating because they are not getting any at home are also liars. Cheaters are cheaters full stop.

For example, it took a month to finally get a guy to slip up he was lying about cheating. His excuse... Because she won't give him a blowjob "

that's bad, that doesn't even come close to an excuse

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"It's worse than cheating if you have a partner you swing with. You are lying to someone who trusts you, shares your lifestyle choice and deserves honesty if nothing else.

I can understand guys who aren't getting any affection etc at home as I have so many female friends who aren't interested any more. But if you are and you cheat, you're a twonk.

And shows that a lot of people saying they are cheating because they are not getting any at home are also liars. Cheaters are cheaters full stop.

For example, it took a month to finally get a guy to slip up he was lying about cheating. His excuse... Because she won't give him a blowjob that's bad, that doesn't even come close to an excuse "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I stopped meeting couples because in every single couple the male then wanted to cheat with me behind his partners back. Dozens of couples and in one instance both the man and the woman approached me looking to cheat.

The funniest/saddest one was a convo with a guy who said...if she is stupid enough to let me have open auditions to find her replacement then I'll fuck everyone she wants me to til I find someone who is better in bed to settle down with

If you share your experience you tend to get shot down but so many single women say the same thing. We cant all be wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Twice today I've been asked to meet alone by the male half of a couple in here without letting he5 know.Its nearly everyday that gets asked.It happens because they want to try something different and the grass is greener elsewhere.Yre there cheats but ranting about it won't stop it happening "

A lot of this is more to do with the fact he's created a couple profile without his other half knowing. She's never going to meet, she doesn't even know she's on here!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I stopped meeting couples because in every single couple the male then wanted to cheat with me behind his partners back. Dozens of couples and in one instance both the man and the woman approached me looking to cheat.

The funniest/saddest one was a convo with a guy who said...if she is stupid enough to let me have open auditions to find her replacement then I'll fuck everyone she wants me to til I find someone who is better in bed to settle down with

If you share your experience you tend to get shot down but so many single women say the same thing. We cant all be wrong."

Swinging - auditions for a replacement.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Leave them a nice veri

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By *ibblingnewtWoman  over a year ago

by the sea


"I’m interested to know if anyone gets the same messages from female halves of couples?

Lacey’s been spending a lot of extra time at church lately and I’m beginning to worry that she may not be embroidering Friday and Saturday evenings until 11:30 pm.

My suspicions have been raised after she departed for church at 7:21 pm last Saturday and left her sowing kit at home!

To top it off when I woke Sunday morning and smelled her hair it had a slight aroma of jock strap "

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By *bcums3Couple  over a year ago

lanarkshire


"I stopped meeting couples because in every single couple the male then wanted to cheat with me behind his partners back. Dozens of couples and in one instance both the man and the woman approached me looking to cheat.

The funniest/saddest one was a convo with a guy who said...if she is stupid enough to let me have open auditions to find her replacement then I'll fuck everyone she wants me to til I find someone who is better in bed to settle down with

If you share your experience you tend to get shot down but so many single women say the same thing. We cant all be wrong."

Think that’s why couples struggle too women just get fed up of the lies and it’s so frustrating as there is gen couples out there and it spoils it for us x (fem)

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