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You know you're getting old when...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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A couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember.
Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair.
'Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?' he asks.
'Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?'
'Sure.'
'Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?' she asks.
'No, I can remember that.'
'Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so as not to forget it?'
He says, 'I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries.'
'I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it down?' she asks.
Irritated, he says, 'I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream...I got it, for goodness sake!'
So he toddles off into the kitchen and after about 20 minutes he returns and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs.
She stares at the plate for a moment and says.....'Where's my toast ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You see a profile where the girl in question won't meet you as guys your age are 'old enough to be her dad'! At 35? Fuck me - i'm definately getting old! Or they're just starting much younger!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You're going to more funerals than weddings.
You can't get up without making a noise, and sigh with relief when you sit down.
You have a cupboard of sexy heeled shoes but live in Clarks "comfy fit" flats.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When going clubbing means taxiing your kids into town and then going home to bed  
And on my birthday, I no-longer stay up late, probably working has more to do it with as really I would just rather have an early night |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you suddenly realise that Radio 2 is the new Radio 1 "
...or you don't listen to music stations at all but talk ones like LBC.
The song you've been humming for days and you decide to buy on Amazon...is only available on vinyl.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you suddenly realise that Radio 2 is the new Radio 1
...or you don't listen to music stations at all but talk ones like LBC.
The song you've been humming for days and you decide to buy on Amazon...is only available on vinyl. "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you suddenly realise that Radio 2 is the new Radio 1
.... and when a TOG rating owes more to Terry Wogan than a cover for steamy bodies... "
What's TOG  is this something as an oldie I have to learn or something as an oldie I have forgotten what it was  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you suddenly realise that Radio 2 is the new Radio 1
.... and when a TOG rating owes more to Terry Wogan than a cover for steamy bodies...
What's TOG is this something as an oldie I have to learn or something as an oldie I have forgotten what it was "
"Terrys Old Geezers" (or Gits)  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You're going to more funerals than weddings.
You can't get up without making a noise, and sigh with relief when you sit down.
You have a cupboard of sexy heeled shoes but live in Clarks "comfy fit" flats. "
Very true I now have shoes I call bedroom heels coz only wear them in bedroom lol  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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My 3y/o kept repeating himself yesterday so I told him to 'change the record'. Then Siren and I looked at each other and realised he'll never have any concept of what that means.
Fuck do I feel old! |
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