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How do you pick your favourite child
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.
How do I pick which child eats tonight?
I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.
Asking for a friend |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If you'd have put both ready meals back you could have bought a scratchcard too AND saved bad feeling between the kids  "
Oooh gambling. Not a bad idea |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Get them to compete in a triathlon. Winner eats. Loser passes out through lack of energy and you don't need to worry about them complaining of hunger all night. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well, my universal credit came in yesterday and I've spent it a on a month's supply of white lightening and vape juice. The kids can forage in the bins behind aldi.
Seriously though, are there any other disadvantaged groups you fancy having a pop at tonight? |
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There's only one possible way to decide. - Mortal combat! Not the video game but full contact fight to the death between the siblings.
Smoke a couple of the cigarettes you had enough money for as you watch your offspring kill each other. Sell the loser's body to medical scientists.
Bish bash bosh extra cash, one less mouth to feed. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well, my universal credit came in yesterday and I've spent it a on a month's supply of white lightening and vape juice. The kids can forage in the bins behind aldi.
Seriously though, are there any other disadvantaged groups you fancy having a pop at tonight? "
The irony of this post  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well, my universal credit came in yesterday and I've spent it a on a month's supply of white lightening and vape juice. The kids can forage in the bins behind aldi.
Seriously though, are there any other disadvantaged groups you fancy having a pop at tonight?
The irony of this post "
It's not ironic, it's sarcastic. My UC actually did come in on Monday. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well, my universal credit came in yesterday and I've spent it a on a month's supply of white lightening and vape juice. The kids can forage in the bins behind aldi.
Seriously though, are there any other disadvantaged groups you fancy having a pop at tonight?
The irony of this post
It's not ironic, it's sarcastic. My UC actually did come in on Monday."
Fair enough, but I have nothing against universal credit or most of the people on it |
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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"Cliquebait
Cliquebait?"
Oh just that this is one of the clickbait threads where if you have any popularity on the forum you can get away with being off colour jokey about other situations that are painful to others. It’s cool, it’s bantz, it’s a laugh. Yay! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Cliquebait
Cliquebait?
Oh just that this is one of the clickbait threads where if you have any popularity on the forum you can get away with being off colour jokey about other situations that are painful to others. It’s cool, it’s bantz, it’s a laugh. Yay! "
I wouldn't class myself as popular. My threads often go unnoticed and when I voice an opinion its usually met with a block button |
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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"Cliquebait
Cliquebait?
Oh just that this is one of the clickbait threads where if you have any popularity on the forum you can get away with being off colour jokey about other situations that are painful to others. It’s cool, it’s bantz, it’s a laugh. Yay!
I wouldn't class myself as popular. My threads often go unnoticed and when I voice an opinion its usually met with a block button"
How can that be? You’re so funny. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Cliquebait
Cliquebait?
Oh just that this is one of the clickbait threads where if you have any popularity on the forum you can get away with being off colour jokey about other situations that are painful to others. It’s cool, it’s bantz, it’s a laugh. Yay!
I wouldn't class myself as popular. My threads often go unnoticed and when I voice an opinion its usually met with a block button
How can that be? You’re so funny. "
I can't tell if youre being sarcastic or not  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There's only one possible way to decide. - Mortal combat! Not the video game but full contact fight to the death between the siblings.
Smoke a couple of the cigarettes you had enough money for as you watch your offspring kill each other. Sell the loser's body to medical scientists.
Bish bash bosh extra cash, one less mouth to feed. "
You basically just described every Sunday dinner in my family. FYI I had 5 siblings once. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"This is very distasteful and not funny at all .... You should be ashamed making fun of this sort of thing.
"
Thank you for bumping it so other people can comment  |
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By *eesideMan
over a year ago
margate sumwear by the sea |
"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.
How do I pick which child eats tonight?
I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.
Asking for a friend "
Thay shood both be your favourite.
Put the fags (£10.00) and the redey meal(£2.00) back !
By some cheese £3.00
Pasta £1.00
Milk £0.80
Cheese sauce mix £0.50
Mack a home made mac n cheese big enough for all of you and you still got change to get a dezort  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.
How do I pick which child eats tonight?
I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.
Asking for a friend
Thay shood both be your favourite.
Put the fags (£10.00) and the redey meal(£2.00) back !
By some cheese £3.00
Pasta £1.00
Milk £0.80
Cheese sauce mix £0.50
Mack a home made mac n cheese big enough for all of you and you still got change to get a dezort "
So what am I supposed to smoke?
You really haven't thought this through have you |
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"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.
How do I pick which child eats tonight?
I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.
Asking for a friend
Thay shood both be your favourite.
Put the fags (£10.00) and the redey meal(£2.00) back !
By some cheese £3.00
Pasta £1.00
Milk £0.80
Cheese sauce mix £0.50
Mack a home made mac n cheese big enough for all of you and you still got change to get a dezort
So what am I supposed to smoke?
You really haven't thought this through have you "
Get a 5p carrier bag, shred it and smoke that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.
How do I pick which child eats tonight?
I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.
Asking for a friend
Thay shood both be your favourite.
Put the fags (£10.00) and the redey meal(£2.00) back !
By some cheese £3.00
Pasta £1.00
Milk £0.80
Cheese sauce mix £0.50
Mack a home made mac n cheese big enough for all of you and you still got change to get a dezort
So what am I supposed to smoke?
You really haven't thought this through have you "
Do what they do in Dundee, go to your local town centre and look for fag stubs on the bins |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Choose which child can eat a meal and which can't, are you serious ????
Yet it's ok you got your fags so no problem, great parenting that.
Isn't it! He's my role model."
He’s the kind of parent I aspire to be |
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"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.
How do I pick which child eats tonight?
I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.
Asking for a friend "
I’d sell half the fags to the kids on the estate, have the other half myself and feed both kids
Or just send them to a friend’s house for tea, no worries then - except the kids without fags |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.
How do I pick which child eats tonight?
I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.
Asking for a friend "
Feed them both. The skip behind the supermarkets always have food past their sell by date. Just cook it thoroughly and they shouldn't get the runs too bad, plus you get the money in your pocket that would have been spent on the one kid
Holly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Get them to compete in a triathlon. Winner eats. Loser passes out through lack of energy and you don't need to worry about them complaining of hunger all night. "
Hahahahahahahah brilliant! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don't but the ready meal, buy a can of gas, let the kids have 1st go on it then when their high enough they will forget their hungry and you have gas left to fill your lighter so you can smoke your Cigs   |
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"Don't but the ready meal, buy a can of gas, let the kids have 1st go on it then when their high enough they will forget their hungry and you have gas left to fill your lighter so you can smoke your Cigs "
That's funny that's what I did as a kid. Give my food to my sister. Nothing against you. But it does happen |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Don't but the ready meal, buy a can of gas, let the kids have 1st go on it then when their high enough they will forget their hungry and you have gas left to fill your lighter so you can smoke your Cigs "
This is a 100% fool proof plan, I cannot see anything going wrong with this |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I made a mental bet with myself to see how many serious answers you would get.
I lost 
Did you go too high to too low?
Too low.
Should know better after 10 years on here."
tut tut |
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