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Stay single until you find the right partner
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We had an interesting discussion about it of how some just rush into finding a partner just to get married but then later regret it, what would you do? I would rather stay single for years to find the one if I wanted a relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you know it's the right one unless you date and have some form of relationship though? "
My thoughts exactly.
Relationships are just trial and error aren't they? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"How do you know it's the right one unless you date and have some form of relationship though?
My thoughts exactly.
Relationships are just trial and error aren't they? "
That is right too as you have to find out that way too. |
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Love can easily turn into hate after a few years together, so longevity doesn’t mean it’ll work.
At the start of a relationship we show the best sides to ourselves, no farting  cooking meals for two with candles, long meaningful conversation etc...then work, families and friends start becoming part of the equation. No time for each other, boring vanilla sex...after match of the day love  we can just see the other as part of the furniture.
That doesn’t mean I think rushing into things is better, just get to know that real person, not the image they’re selling.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The thing is, you never know if it is the right person. And over t
Even if you initially thought it was the right person, they can turn out to be the wrong one over time! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not overly fussed about getting married. So for me dating is about other things rather 1 track mind of marriage etc.
I am 6 months out of a relationship that almost lasted 6years and I'm not dating anyone or seeing anyone yet and not in a rush to either.
~Mia |
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I've been single for a while now. To begin with I did want a relationship and ideally I would love to date. I miss all the nice bits about being together with someone. The mad passionate sex on a regular basis and cuddles and being kissed.. Someone to go out to cinema with or even just a walk. But so far it hasn't happened.
But as time goes on I'm just embracing my single life. I don't need someone in my life to make me happy, and I would rather stay single then settle for average.
My inner self likes to think he's out there somewhere and I'll meet him when the time is right, and if it doesn't happen then that's OK too.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's an awkward one isn't it.
You can think you've found your forever love, I'm sure my parents did but after 30 years they split which I truly believe was the right thing for them to do.
In some cases religion is involved too, divorce could be frowned upon. You could find yourself staying with someone for the sake of not disappointing your parents, whilst the true love of your life is left in limbo, giving away what's left of the best years of their life in wait.
I have a friend who's in exactly that situation, completely in love with someone but too afraid of the fallout to make any changes, doesn't want to upset their parents and immediate family or friends.
I think it's incredibly sad, as they are unable to move on in life and will more than likely find themselves really lonely when the person who's holding out for them realises they're worth more than being in limbo, and deserves to be with someone who will love them completely and commit to them fully. What's even sadder about it is my mate doesn't even believe in religion, it's all to keep everyone else happy! Not fair on anyone involved. 2 people separated but living together to keep up a show for their parents, meaning neither can move on and be happy.
Fact is people change and step families are pretty much the norm.
P |
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"Im on dating apps and sick of all these dates and it not leading to anything.
It’s difficult to find someone who is just basically nice and normal’ish
^^^^this the dating apps are awful  "
Absolutely, send message no reply or dreary conversation about nothing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Good singleship until you find the love of your life and start a relationship everyone 
Until then, fuck fruit.
Fresh fruits though "
Stay clear of strawberries though, they just turn to mush |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im going to be the crazy old cat lady....no bugger wants a relationship with me  Awww someone for everyone on this planetwell maybe"
relationships are formed initially with give and take then once established generally the man gives lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im going to be the crazy old cat lady....no bugger wants a relationship with me Awww someone for everyone on this planetwell mayberelationships are formed initially with give and take then once established generally the man gives lol "
i was married 18 yrs believe thats not how it is  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im going to be the crazy old cat lady....no bugger wants a relationship with me Awww someone for everyone on this planetwell mayberelationships are formed initially with give and take then once established generally the man gives lol i was married 18 yrs believe thats not how it is "
Ahhh I did say it tongue in cheek but that was how it was for me lol |
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"Im on dating apps and sick of all these dates and it not leading to anything.
It’s difficult to find someone who is just basically nice and normal’ish "
So true!! I've often wondered if all the 'normal' people all live in one village or town...everyone I've met in the last few years just aren't even capable of a relationship 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Most people can't differentiate between emotional attachment and being in love, this and the fact we are pretty much taught, from an early age, that we are not proper people unless in a committed relationship, leads to the misery cause by failed ones, with people we weren't compatible nor in love with in the first place, usually.
I will be avoiding any sort of commitment again, anyway, so not a problem for me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’d rather be single than with anyone that didn’t add something to life. Spent the last 8 years alone and would do it all over again if necessary. I don’t need a partner, but it’s nice to want one again..
saff |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’d rather be single than with anyone that didn’t add something to life. Spent the last 8 years alone and would do it all over again if necessary. I don’t need a partner, but it’s nice to want one again..
saff "
i dont need one but would be nice to have someone x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’d rather be single than with anyone that didn’t add something to life. Spent the last 8 years alone and would do it all over again if necessary. I don’t need a partner, but it’s nice to want one again..
saff i dont need one but would be nice to have someone x"
I never expected to find one.. weird how things just happen when you’re not looking x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’d rather be single than with anyone that didn’t add something to life. Spent the last 8 years alone and would do it all over again if necessary. I don’t need a partner, but it’s nice to want one again..
saff i dont need one but would be nice to have someone x
I never expected to find one.. weird how things just happen when you’re not looking x "
thats the trouble i dont look something happens then it goes arse over tit and im on my own oops now im going on .....and ive decided not goung to be crazy cat women.....im going to have a house full of vivs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve been single for nearly 5yrs for a number of reasons but mostly because I haven’t met someone who is worth giving up my single life for just yet. No settling here! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve been single for nearly 5yrs for a number of reasons but mostly because I haven’t met someone who is worth giving up my single life for just yet. No settling here!"
you're still young, travel see the world then settle
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve been single for nearly 5yrs for a number of reasons but mostly because I haven’t met someone who is worth giving up my single life for just yet. No settling here!you're still young, travel see the world then settle "
That’s what I’ve spent most of my 20’s doing, all solo very glad to have been able to be carefree and completely selfish. |
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The 'right one' never materialises.
Seek happiness.
Just do the things you enjoy whilst creating happiness for others.
So marry and change partners as often as you wish ...... The one you want when you are 17 won't be the one you want at 21 or 51 or 70.
If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with.
Amen sisters.
Up yours brothers. |
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"The 'right one' never materialises.
Seek happiness.
Just do the things you enjoy whilst creating happiness for others.
So marry and change partners as often as you wish ...... The one you want when you are 17 won't be the one you want at 21 or 51 or 70.
If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with.
Amen sisters.
Up yours brothers. "
Good post Granny |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Good singleship until you find the love of your life and start a relationship everyone
Until then, fuck fruit.
Fresh fruits though
Stay clear of strawberries though, they just turn to mush "
Especially if you try to put them into eldery's anuses |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The 'right one' never materialises.
Seek happiness.
Just do the things you enjoy whilst creating happiness for others.
So marry and change partners as often as you wish ...... The one you want when you are 17 won't be the one you want at 21 or 51 or 70.
If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with.
Amen sisters.
Up yours brothers.
Good post Granny "
This |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Never been Married, never had a relationship that's lasted more than 6 months spent my childhood in care homes, been a rolling Stone all my life, no kids (not that I know of anyway), my job has seen to that in my adult life.
Some say I am lucky but I look back and think cursed more like. Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The 'right one' never materialises.
Seek happiness.
Just do the things you enjoy whilst creating happiness for others.
So marry and change partners as often as you wish ...... The one you want when you are 17 won't be the one you want at 21 or 51 or 70.
If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with.
Amen sisters.
Up yours brothers. "
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It's an awkward one isn't it.
You can think you've found your forever love, I'm sure my parents did but after 30 years they split which I truly believe was the right thing for them to do.
In some cases religion is involved too, divorce could be frowned upon. You could find yourself staying with someone for the sake of not disappointing your parents, whilst the true love of your life is left in limbo, giving away what's left of the best years of their life in wait.
I have a friend who's in exactly that situation, completely in love with someone but too afraid of the fallout to make any changes, doesn't want to upset their parents and immediate family or friends.
I think it's incredibly sad, as they are unable to move on in life and will more than likely find themselves really lonely when the person who's holding out for them realises they're worth more than being in limbo, and deserves to be with someone who will love them completely and commit to them fully. What's even sadder about it is my mate doesn't even believe in religion, it's all to keep everyone else happy! Not fair on anyone involved. 2 people separated but living together to keep up a show for their parents, meaning neither can move on and be happy.
Fact is people change and step families are pretty much the norm.
P"
Yes, it is a quite awkward one too |
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"I would rather stay single for years to find the one if I wanted a relationship."
You have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince/princess.
One reason we treasure our relationship is because we have both been in bad ones and recognise a good one when we see it. We refer to them to avoid the mistakes of the past.
Life experiences, including bad ones, are still valuable. It's more important to be willing and able to escape from bad situations than sequester yourself away and never run the risk of being in a bad one. Risk is part of any relationship. If you avoid risk, you may end up missing the very thing that you hope to find and/or brings you happiness. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you know it's the right one unless you date and have some form of relationship though?
My thoughts exactly.
Relationships are just trial and error aren't they? That is right too as you have to find out that way too."
Yep! You can learn from them. You have to try if you're looking for the "right one" otherwise becomes more difficult. I have never married, but dating in the past was fun. If things progress with the right person that would be amazing.
In the mean time single life ain't bad you know... it's fabulous. As they say expect the unexpected... you just never know what could happen |
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