FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do fuck buddies get jealous ?
Do fuck buddies get jealous ?
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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Some fuck buddies get jealous yes. Is it the fact you're having sex with other women or it's front of her? The dynamic might be making her uncomfortable. Quite often when jealousy pops up in that sort of thing it is from a place of insecurity and worry about being replaced etc. Solving that can go some way to helping it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Jealousy is a natural , human emotion when feelings are there.
Some will say there’s no place for it on here , some will say it never happens to them etc etc
If she’s jealous then don’t hurt her by doing it - end the friendship or stop having sex with others in front of her
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a bi fem friend and we have great sex but she gets jealous watching me with other women x anyone else have same problem ?"
If she gets jealous, why would you have sex in front of her? Not judging, just genuinely curious?
I wouldn't be with someone if i had that type of connection that triggered jealousy. It would have to be an exclusive arrangement or I'd find someone I wasn't attached to  |
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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"Nope, if i got jealous over a fuck buddy, a swingers site would be the wrong place for me.  "
Really? I mean it’s great it doesn’t affect you, but I do think that to say anyone that feels a reflex reaction such as jealousy shouldn’t be on here is dismissive and or naive - jealousy is the prompt to continue talking and communicating with your partner, a vital part of swinging. |
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By *obletonMan
over a year ago
A Home Among The Woodland Creatures |
"I have a bi fem friend and we have great sex but she gets jealous watching me with other women x anyone else have same problem ?"
How do you feel when you see her with other guys? |
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"Jealousy is a natural , human emotion when feelings are there.
Some will say there’s no place for it on here , some will say it never happens to them etc etc
If she’s jealous then don’t hurt her by doing it - end the friendship or stop having sex with others in front of her
"
^^^^^^ this. I don't understand why just because it's a swingers site jealousy is made out to be such a bad emotion. I have insecurities and at times I get jealous, but not in a weird controlling way. I've learnt that if I'm not comfortable then it's time to stop whatever it is that is making me feel that way and move on.
But you maybe need to have a talk with your FB OP... Often we all pretend it doesn't matter and we don't feel anything... When really it does matter. I think communication is key and working out what works personally on a site like this.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nope, if i got jealous over a fuck buddy, a swingers site would be the wrong place for me.
Really? I mean it’s great it doesn’t affect you, but I do think that to say anyone that feels a reflex reaction such as jealousy shouldn’t be on here is dismissive and or naive - jealousy is the prompt to continue talking and communicating with your partner, a vital part of swinging. "
Yes. Really.
I don't, and have never had romantic feelings for a fuck buddy. For me, a fuck buddy is a friend I have sex with. If I was jealous in anyway I'd simply not swing with them. My partner is another matter, though, even then, we only do what we're both comfortable with.
I'm speaking personally, for myself. If I had issues with jealousy I wouldn't be swinging.
Obviously, it's not the same for everyone, we're all different. |
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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"Nope, if i got jealous over a fuck buddy, a swingers site would be the wrong place for me.
Really? I mean it’s great it doesn’t affect you, but I do think that to say anyone that feels a reflex reaction such as jealousy shouldn’t be on here is dismissive and or naive - jealousy is the prompt to continue talking and communicating with your partner, a vital part of swinging.
Yes. Really.
I don't, and have never had romantic feelings for a fuck buddy. For me, a fuck buddy is a friend I have sex with. If I was jealous in anyway I'd simply not swing with them. My partner is another matter, though, even then, we only do what we're both comfortable with.
I'm speaking personally, for myself. If I had issues with jealousy I wouldn't be swinging.
Obviously, it's not the same for everyone, we're all different."
Fair enough. I don’t equate jealousy as only being linked to romantic feelings. But thanks for clarifying and you *did* write it would be the wrong place for you, which I extrapolated incorrectly. X |
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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago
stockport |
Yes..... I get very possessive which isn’t good at all. I know this is my issue and am trying to separate emotions with swinging but it’s pretty tough.
But it also depends on the situation. If it’s a play in a club then I’m ok with that. It’s if I’ve built a friendship. It just comes natural to me to get feelings if I’ve bonded in that way......
But vice versa I do like a guy that gets possessive over me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes i get jealous and yes its down to my own insecurities and feeling second best etc sometimes i just cant help it....i am only human i do try to keep it all under wraps |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes they do - I've seen dozens of people in the scene suddenly want to start being exclusive with fuckbuddies or someone they played with once at a club. Or (mainly women) laying claim to someone they have seen and warning others not to play with them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't stand for jealousy from a FB. That would signify it's time to move on to me. The only person allowed to get jealous when I'm meeting is hubby  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't stand for jealousy from a FB. That would signify it's time to move on to me. The only person allowed to get jealous when I'm meeting is hubby "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nope, if i got jealous over a fuck buddy, a swingers site would be the wrong place for me.
Really? I mean it’s great it doesn’t affect you, but I do think that to say anyone that feels a reflex reaction such as jealousy shouldn’t be on here is dismissive and or naive - jealousy is the prompt to continue talking and communicating with your partner, a vital part of swinging.
Yes. Really.
I don't, and have never had romantic feelings for a fuck buddy. For me, a fuck buddy is a friend I have sex with. If I was jealous in anyway I'd simply not swing with them. My partner is another matter, though, even then, we only do what we're both comfortable with.
I'm speaking personally, for myself. If I had issues with jealousy I wouldn't be swinging.
Obviously, it's not the same for everyone, we're all different.
Fair enough. I don’t equate jealousy as only being linked to romantic feelings. But thanks for clarifying and you *did* write it would be the wrong place for you, which I extrapolated incorrectly. X"
I'm probably "abnormal" (for want of a better word) in that I don't have those feelings. I've always seen sex as a recreational activity when I've been single, and my current relationship is the only one where we've swung. Having been swinging for years with several long term fuck buddies I've just always been cool with whatever, jealousy hasn't ever been an issue. But I know I can get jealous with a partner and I don't like that feeling at all, that would see me calling it a day. |
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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"Nope, if i got jealous over a fuck buddy, a swingers site would be the wrong place for me.
Really? I mean it’s great it doesn’t affect you, but I do think that to say anyone that feels a reflex reaction such as jealousy shouldn’t be on here is dismissive and or naive - jealousy is the prompt to continue talking and communicating with your partner, a vital part of swinging.
Yes. Really.
I don't, and have never had romantic feelings for a fuck buddy. For me, a fuck buddy is a friend I have sex with. If I was jealous in anyway I'd simply not swing with them. My partner is another matter, though, even then, we only do what we're both comfortable with.
I'm speaking personally, for myself. If I had issues with jealousy I wouldn't be swinging.
Obviously, it's not the same for everyone, we're all different.
Fair enough. I don’t equate jealousy as only being linked to romantic feelings. But thanks for clarifying and you *did* write it would be the wrong place for you, which I extrapolated incorrectly. X
I'm probably "abnormal" (for want of a better word) in that I don't have those feelings. I've always seen sex as a recreational activity when I've been single, and my current relationship is the only one where we've swung. Having been swinging for years with several long term fuck buddies I've just always been cool with whatever, jealousy hasn't ever been an issue. But I know I can get jealous with a partner and I don't like that feeling at all, that would see me calling it a day. "
You’re not abnormal at all! You’re you! And 
I just worry when (and I read your comment incorrectly) people chastise others for feeling jealousy, it can lead to repressing emotions and people failing to self advocate what’s happening for them. Jealousy is just an emotion, how one chooses to act on it is the important thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nope, if i got jealous over a fuck buddy, a swingers site would be the wrong place for me.
Really? I mean it’s great it doesn’t affect you, but I do think that to say anyone that feels a reflex reaction such as jealousy shouldn’t be on here is dismissive and or naive - jealousy is the prompt to continue talking and communicating with your partner, a vital part of swinging.
Yes. Really.
I don't, and have never had romantic feelings for a fuck buddy. For me, a fuck buddy is a friend I have sex with. If I was jealous in anyway I'd simply not swing with them. My partner is another matter, though, even then, we only do what we're both comfortable with.
I'm speaking personally, for myself. If I had issues with jealousy I wouldn't be swinging.
Obviously, it's not the same for everyone, we're all different.
Fair enough. I don’t equate jealousy as only being linked to romantic feelings. But thanks for clarifying and you *did* write it would be the wrong place for you, which I extrapolated incorrectly. X
I'm probably "abnormal" (for want of a better word) in that I don't have those feelings. I've always seen sex as a recreational activity when I've been single, and my current relationship is the only one where we've swung. Having been swinging for years with several long term fuck buddies I've just always been cool with whatever, jealousy hasn't ever been an issue. But I know I can get jealous with a partner and I don't like that feeling at all, that would see me calling it a day.
You’re not abnormal at all! You’re you! And
I just worry when (and I read your comment incorrectly) people chastise others for feeling jealousy, it can lead to repressing emotions and people failing to self advocate what’s happening for them. Jealousy is just an emotion, how one chooses to act on it is the important thing. "
Oh nooooo, who am I to tell someone else how they should feel? Jealousy is a perfectly normal, healthy emotion.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Jealousy is natural, it's the way we deal with it that matters. If you having sex in front of her is upsetting her in a way that makes the situation not enjoyable for her then it's time to sit down and discuss what she would be ok with or call it a day.
You may find a change of scenario is all it takes, I know for me I'm more comfortable in an MFMF than MFF. |
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I think many of the fuck buddies we talk to if you don't offer something to the male they don't let the females know,in our case as the wife don't play with other men and the ones we spoke to say they meet separately,but it never leads to any thing,could possibly be they aren't interested but I some how doubt it very much, especially as they are looking to play alone and with couples or females
I'd also have to say this isn't the place for jealousy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do and will happily admit it, for me having a fwb comes with more trust and respect especially for the other person.
I’m quite open and honest from the start how I treat people and I do expect to be treated the same.
If I don’t feel I’m being treated with respect I will walk simple as that no matter how good the sexual chemistry.
I’m a person with feelings not a warm emotionless hole to be used and battered. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some guys I met on fab got jealous of other guys after reading their veris so I don't display them. "
It's funny how we're all different. I'd carry on displaying and tell them to give their head a wobble!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fair play to her for admitting it and communicating about it. Communication is so so important.
It's actually a VERY interesting subject to research. I found I had some underlying unresolved bits and bobs that made so much sense when I researched the "why" of jealousy and the huge umbrella that jealousy covers.
Strange how your mother telling you you aren't doing well enough, trying hard enough, will never amount to anything can have such a long term impact that you don't even realise.
A little patience and reassurance, plus internal work and not being afraid to challenge yourself can help.
P |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Jealousy is a natural , human emotion when feelings are there.
Some will say there’s no place for it on here , some will say it never happens to them etc etc
If she’s jealous then don’t hurt her by doing it - end the friendship or stop having sex with others in front of her
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do and will happily admit it, for me having a fwb comes with more trust and respect especially for the other person.
I’m quite open and honest from the start how I treat people and I do expect to be treated the same.
If I don’t feel I’m being treated with respect I will walk simple as that no matter how good the sexual chemistry.
I’m a person with feelings not a warm emotionless hole to be used and battered. "
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"I do and will happily admit it, for me having a fwb comes with more trust and respect especially for the other person.
I’m quite open and honest from the start how I treat people and I do expect to be treated the same.
If I don’t feel I’m being treated with respect I will walk simple as that no matter how good the sexual chemistry.
I’m a person with feelings not a warm emotionless hole to be used and battered. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do and will happily admit it, for me having a fwb comes with more trust and respect especially for the other person.
I’m quite open and honest from the start how I treat people and I do expect to be treated the same.
If I don’t feel I’m being treated with respect I will walk simple as that no matter how good the sexual chemistry.
I’m a person with feelings not a warm emotionless hole to be used and battered.
"
|
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"I do and will happily admit it, for me having a fwb comes with more trust and respect especially for the other person.
I’m quite open and honest from the start how I treat people and I do expect to be treated the same.
If I don’t feel I’m being treated with respect I will walk simple as that no matter how good the sexual chemistry.
I’m a person with feelings not a warm emotionless hole to be used and battered. "
Exactly this.
I've had problems with jealous forum harpies sometimes, but I just report them and any fake accounts to admin. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So some do some don't.
I've had female fuck buddies that have set me up with their female friends and have enjoyed seeing me and me seeing them with others. We've still managed to keep the Fwb relationship going.
My current Fwb is getting a bit clingy though and I get the impression she's after something more. She certainly gets a bit jellous when we've been to Cameleons and other women have made a move on me. |
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"I have a bi fem friend and we have great sex but she gets jealous watching me with other women x anyone else have same problem ?"
Yes and no.... I have had FB that have had the issue.. but they quickly get told that we are no longer FBS. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Jealousy is a natural , human emotion when feelings are there.
Some will say there’s no place for it on here , some will say it never happens to them etc etc
If she’s jealous then don’t hurt her by doing it - end the friendship or stop having sex with others in front of her
"
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Jealousy is a natural , human emotion when feelings are there.
Some will say there’s no place for it on here , some will say it never happens to them etc etc
If she’s jealous then don’t hurt her by doing it - end the friendship or stop having sex with others in front of her
^^^^^^ this. I don't understand why just because it's a swingers site jealousy is made out to be such a bad emotion. I have insecurities and at times I get jealous, but not in a weird controlling way. I've learnt that if I'm not comfortable then it's time to stop whatever it is that is making me feel that way and move on.
But you maybe need to have a talk with your FB OP... Often we all pretend it doesn't matter and we don't feel anything... When really it does matter. I think communication is key and working out what works personally on a site like this.
Exactly this. A lot just pretend it doesn’t bother them and that’s when the horrible jealousy and bitchiness comes out. What’s the point in pretending? I’m always upfront about it. I’ve tried it and I can’t do it. I can’t share and I’m not going to. If I meet someone it’s just them and vice versa otherwise it’s not happening. Yes it’s rare on here but not impossible. People just need to be more honest.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've only gotten jealous because of fab once. That was more like envy due to a meet meeting a really hot lovely lady before he met me. But it was a good envy to me.
I don't like the term 'fuck buddy' but at the moment I only have one person I meet off here and someone from my work who I'm having a bit of a fling with. Both know of each other, neither are fussed about each other as far as I know, which works for me. |
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By *an_LexaCouple
over a year ago
Sunderland |
If she gets jealous watching, then that’s not the kind of relationship you should be having, not how you should be playing around together. That’s not for everyone.
So many single people on here admit that their intent is purely 1 on 1 encounters and I think you need to explore that with her. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I think jealousy at one level or another is a perfectly natural instinctive feeling. What is key is how that jealousy manifests itself and how the person who that person has jealous feelings over deals with it, or wants to deal with it.
Jealousy can have a broad spectrum of reactions and indeed definition - from simple wistfulness of wishing it was you at one end, to full blown rage and overblown reaction at the other end.
You've not said OP how you know she's jealous, or how she displays that jealousy.
Either way I'd suggest an open and honest discussion to understand what is driving her jealousy, perhaps she wants more than you do from what you have, perhaps it's the fact you play with others in front of her, could be any number of things, then you have to decide if you want to carry on, and if so make appropriate adjustments on both sides to try and deal with it, or call a halt to it. |
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