FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Is it ok to have double standards?
Is it ok to have double standards?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Yes of course. It’s preference (hate that word!). I’m a bisexual woman who doesn’t meet bisexual men. I don’t see how it’s double standards.  "
I reckon people say it's double standards to try and 'shame' people into agreeing to meet them after all. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes of course. It’s preference (hate that word!). I’m a bisexual woman who doesn’t meet bisexual men. I don’t see how it’s double standards.
I reckon people say it's double standards to try and 'shame' people into agreeing to meet them after all. "
Maybe. Wouldn’t work with me though. I like what I like. I don’t see the need to explain reasons either which people often demand. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?"
Let’s be honest here for a moment .
If it wasn’t ok to have these double standards , the ratio of women to men would be even worse than it already is !
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Not sure how bisexual women not meeting bisexual men is a double standard - they're completely different things.
Of the other things listed - of course it's ok people can choose to have whatever preferences they want on here so long as they aren't driven by hatred or bigotry - and shouldn't be attacked for them, neither should they be surprised if having those preferences work against them. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I think it’s perfectly acceptable. I’m not sure they are double standards. At least, bi women not meeting bi men is not a double-standard, as far as I’m concerned.
"
I don't think it is either, I just used it as an example because some people do say it's a double standard. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not sure how bisexual women not meeting bisexual men is a double standard - they're completely different things.
Of the other things listed - of course it's ok people can choose to have whatever preferences they want on here **so long as they aren't driven by hatred or bigotry** - and shouldn't be attacked for them, neither should they be surprised if having those preferences work against them."
** I'm still (always) trying to get my head round this comment (that gets mentioned by many people in various threads). Your comment on my other thread is helping. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Everybody has preferences for things they won’t do, or people they won’t meet. It’s hardly double standards just because a third party doesn’t like them."
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes of course. It’s preference (hate that word!). I’m a bisexual woman who doesn’t meet bisexual men. I don’t see how it’s double standards. "
ooooo Nora has blue eyes, so cute  ... Sorry I like pretty eyes  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I pretty much have no standards.. . As long as you're a woman with a decent personality and we get on well ... I couldn't give a flying monkey if you're fat thin tall small hairy old young black white Asian ..... Alien with 3 tits? .... I'd be happy. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
You can't stop people having 'double standards' (often a subjective term anyway). If you notice them and don't like them then you are of course free to avoid the person(s) concerned, just as you would for any other unattractive feature they possess. They really don't take up any of my headspace |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?"
Women who don't even have a penis who won't meet men with less than 8 inches.
If somebody has standards, such as pics or verification showing, which they don't confirm with on their own profile it doesn't matter unless the people they want to meet have the same rules.
And we know that some people (mostly men) would email an empty profile, if the box marked woman is ticked. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Depending on what you mean by "OK", I'd say people can make their own choices on this matter. If it puts people off and lowers their chances of finding people they would otherwise like, that's their problem.
If they aren't preachy, live and let live. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Let's not confuse standards with preference
There is a difference
You can have standards (double or otherwise) and you can also exercise preference
As long as I fit both their standards and preference and they meet mine, I'm happy to meet
If, however, during the course of that meet they said or did something I was uncomfortable with, I'd happily call it quits |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Pointed out to my mom the other day when she hit me, we ran from my father because of domestic violence, yet the only thing I can remember is her hitting me around the head, at full whack with hands, shoes, hairbrush, and belts (buckle end. Told her that's why had I had kids, I wouldn't have left them with her - the bitter battle goes on! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"double standards" usually used on here by those who don't get what they want or things don't go their way. There is no entitlement and a person has the right to have their standards and preferences as to how they run their profile ect. Accept it or move on I say ?? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_MariusMan
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?"
No, it’s absolutely not ok; however, the fact that it’s not ok is completely different from the fact that you have the freedom to put whatever you want on your profile. People are similarly free to reject your double standards or approach you in spite of them. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"Not sure how bisexual women not meeting bisexual men is a double standard - they're completely different things.
Of the other things listed - of course it's ok people can choose to have whatever preferences they want on here **so long as they aren't driven by hatred or bigotry** - and shouldn't be attacked for them, neither should they be surprised if having those preferences work against them.
** I'm still (always) trying to get my head round this comment (that gets mentioned by many people in various threads). Your comment on my other thread is helping. "
There's nothing to get your head round really - it's quite simple - if someone says they have a preference not to meet me, not a problem - however say they don't want to meet me because I'm a fat 54 year old bloke who likes to play with cocks and am therefore likely to have an STI then they'll get both barrels. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Pointed out to my mom the other day when she hit me, we ran from my father because of domestic violence, yet the only thing I can remember is her hitting me around the head, at full whack with hands, shoes, hairbrush, and belts (buckle end. Told her that's why had I had kids, I wouldn't have left them with her - the bitter battle goes on!"
She hit you recently? Hope you're ok. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
""double standards" usually used on here by those who don't get what they want or things don't go their way. There is no entitlement and a person has the right to have their standards and preferences as to how they run their profile ect. Accept it or move on I say ??"
I think that's usually what people mean when they call something double standards. They are trying to guilt the person into changing their mind. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?
No, it’s absolutely not ok; however, the fact that it’s not ok is completely different from the fact that you have the freedom to put whatever you want on your profile. People are similarly free to reject your double standards or approach you in spite of them."
Why is it not ok? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not sure how bisexual women not meeting bisexual men is a double standard - they're completely different things.
Of the other things listed - of course it's ok people can choose to have whatever preferences they want on here **so long as they aren't driven by hatred or bigotry** - and shouldn't be attacked for them, neither should they be surprised if having those preferences work against them.
** I'm still (always) trying to get my head round this comment (that gets mentioned by many people in various threads). Your comment on my other thread is helping.
There's nothing to get your head round really - it's quite simple - if someone says they have a preference not to meet me, not a problem - however say they don't want to meet me because I'm a fat 54 year old bloke who likes to play with cocks and am therefore likely to have an STI then they'll get both barrels."
But it's the same outcome. It's a no.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?"
Yeah, only if you are a hypocrite though |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"Not sure how bisexual women not meeting bisexual men is a double standard - they're completely different things.
Of the other things listed - of course it's ok people can choose to have whatever preferences they want on here **so long as they aren't driven by hatred or bigotry** - and shouldn't be attacked for them, neither should they be surprised if having those preferences work against them.
** I'm still (always) trying to get my head round this comment (that gets mentioned by many people in various threads). Your comment on my other thread is helping.
There's nothing to get your head round really - it's quite simple - if someone says they have a preference not to meet me, not a problem - however say they don't want to meet me because I'm a fat 54 year old bloke who likes to play with cocks and am therefore likely to have an STI then they'll get both barrels.
But it's the same outcome. It's a no.
"
Yes it's the same outcome and that outcome should be accepted regardless - however what should not be accepted or tolerated is the way the second example was expressed |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_MariusMan
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?
No, it’s absolutely not ok; however, the fact that it’s not ok is completely different from the fact that you have the freedom to put whatever you want on your profile. People are similarly free to reject your double standards or approach you in spite of them.
Why is it not ok?"
Because the person who applies the double standards e.g. hiding their verifications while expecting other people to show theirs on their profile, is insulting other people’s intelligence. And as I said before, one is free to do what they want in their profile but also other people are free to think that one is an arsehole.
To give you another—slightly more extreme—example, I have the freedom to say in my profile “I don’t meet blacks, I only find white people attractive”. It is my freedom to do so, but that doesn’t mean I am not an arsehole. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
People are within their rights to have preferences. So that is okay. I wouldn't want to be involved with someone who embraced double standards though. I knew someone who wanted an MFF because they had a fantasy of being with two women, but rejected an MMF because they hated the idea of not being enough for a woman, despite not understanding that the women may feel that she is not enough. That type of double standard person can piss off. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
What about men that don't want to meet bisexual females then??
The bisexual arguments are always aimed at women on Fab. That in itself is a double standard.
X
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_MariusMan
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"What about men that don't want to meet bisexual females then??
The bisexual arguments are always aimed at women on Fab. That in itself is a double standard.
X
"
Yes, it is absolutely a double standard and it is a stupid one! For example I, as a man who prefers men and has no problem with a woman’s body, am not aroused by lesbian sex in person, like lots of heterosexual men are, but I have never been turned off by bisexual women! And I wouldn’t reject them! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not sure how bisexual women not meeting bisexual men is a double standard - they're completely different things.
Of the other things listed - of course it's ok people can choose to have whatever preferences they want on here **so long as they aren't driven by hatred or bigotry** - and shouldn't be attacked for them, neither should they be surprised if having those preferences work against them.
** I'm still (always) trying to get my head round this comment (that gets mentioned by many people in various threads). Your comment on my other thread is helping.
There's nothing to get your head round really - it's quite simple - if someone says they have a preference not to meet me, not a problem - however say they don't want to meet me because I'm a fat 54 year old bloke who likes to play with cocks and am therefore likely to have an STI then they'll get both barrels.
But it's the same outcome. It's a no.
Yes it's the same outcome and that outcome should be accepted regardless - however what should not be accepted or tolerated is the way the second example was expressed "
Got it. I agree. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Maybe not the best place to ask this question for a decent answer, but of course everyone can do what they choose on here. Consequences always apply mind.....
Steve x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Maybe not the best place to ask this question for a decent answer, but of course everyone can do what they choose on here. Consequences always apply mind.....
Steve x "
What consequences? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"No, it’s not okay. But it happens all the time. 
Why is it not ok?"
Because it’s hypocritical, which I don’t think is a good thing. It is something we all are though (hypocrites) about all manner of things either consistently or occasionally. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We choose our own rules and standards in life and often live with our own conflicting positions. It's probably better to have coherent standards with unity rather than conflict. Some people will manage ok whatever mash-up they use, others not. Personal evolution is likely based on our experience but some will still remain with double standards - it's then up to the rest of us to select out what we don't accept.
I'm not particularly tolerant of people who want to impose what I perceive to be imbalanced standards. People who take more than they give I let go of quite quickly |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I really can’t get my head around the way some people think on here! So unless you’re willing to meet anyone you’re a hypocrite or have double standards!!
So a bisexual woman who prefers not to meet bisexual men
A fat woman who prefers not to meet fat men
A white woman who prefers not to meet white men
A bald man who prefers to not meet bald women
A skinny man who prefers curvy women.
All hypocrites then with this line of thinking?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eclanHMan
over a year ago
Liphook |
"I really can’t get my head around the way some people think on here! So unless you’re willing to meet anyone you’re a hypocrite or have double standards!!
So a bisexual woman who prefers not to meet bisexual men
A fat woman who prefers not to meet fat men
A white woman who prefers not to meet white men
A bald man who prefers to not meet bald women
A skinny man who prefers curvy women.
All hypocrites then with this line of thinking?
"
This. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I really can’t get my head around the way some people think on here! So unless you’re willing to meet anyone you’re a hypocrite or have double standards!!
So a bisexual woman who prefers not to meet bisexual men
A fat woman who prefers not to meet fat men
A white woman who prefers not to meet white men
A bald man who prefers to not meet bald women
A skinny man who prefers curvy women.
All hypocrites then with this line of thinking?
"
100% true.. god forbid people have sex with someone they just fancy!! It's that simple.
Saff |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"No, it’s not okay. But it happens all the time.
Why is it not ok?
Because it’s hypocritical, which I don’t think is a good thing. It is something we all are though (hypocrites) about all manner of things either consistently or occasionally. "
People will undoubtedly personalise an answer in the purest sense as being a chastisement of how they live. I don’t think for a second that a) bisexual women not meeting bisexual men is a double standard nor that anyone should meet anyone that they don’t want to (and have never posted otherwise). Phrase the OP with same question title and different examples, you’d have got different answers from many. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?"
These examples aren’t double standards. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?
These examples aren’t double standards. "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
Double standards are a rule or principle which is unfairly applied in different ways to different people or groups.
... someone who won't meet people with no pics but does meet two people with no pics
... someone who won't meet people who hide their verifications, but does meet one person who hides theirs
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men but do meet those three bisexual men
I think you’ll agree these are hypocritical people, albeit we all do it sometimes. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?
These examples aren’t double standards. "
What are then? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I really can’t get my head around the way some people think on here! So unless you’re willing to meet anyone you’re a hypocrite or have double standards!!
So a bisexual woman who prefers not to meet bisexual men
A fat woman who prefers not to meet fat men
A white woman who prefers not to meet white men
A bald man who prefers to not meet bald women
A skinny man who prefers curvy women.
All hypocrites then with this line of thinking?
"
Can't win either way. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?"
Just because someone has no pics on their profile doesnt mean they dont have private ones they can send.
Just pointing that out |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?"
In the spirit and nature of the kind of double standards you are talking about here yes. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?"
Yes |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Sure, id fuck someone on here that i wouldn't ever consider having a relationship with.
You know that's against forum rules, right?  "
Anyway, i thought it was only against forum rules to admit it!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For example-
... someone has no pics on their profile but won't meet people with no pics.
... someone hides their verifications but won't meet people who hide theirs.
... bisexual women who won't meet bisexual men.
... etc
Is it ok to have double standards?"
Ever heard about private photos or direct send?
The thing about bisexual women is just a question of personal choice. They do not find bisexual men attractive. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
