FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Accommodate or not?
Accommodate or not?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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If you accommodate, what checks do you do on the people who you meet and invite into your house?
If you don't accommodate, what would change your mind so that you would? (For example seeing some kind of references.) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Wants to have sex with me:check
Not carrying a concealed weapon(I'll ask and take her word for it):check
Looks clean and doesn't swear like a soldier:check
Good to go  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I won't accommodate because I still live at home... I've not had a reason to move yet.
If say I had a girlfriend and was planning a family which is highly unlikely then I'd move out.
Other than that no reason. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had an issue with someone after accommodating and it's made me very wary (I had met him several times before and had no inkling be was a bit of a nut job). I'm not saying I would never do it again but it would take a lot of convincing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you accommodate, what checks do you do on the people who you meet and invite into your house?
If you don't accommodate, what would change your mind so that you would? (For example seeing some kind of references.)"
Ask if they have a vagina and tits, if they do my door is always open. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you accommodate, what checks do you do on the people who you meet and invite into your house?
If you don't accommodate, what would change your mind so that you would? (For example seeing some kind of references.)
Ask if they have a vagina and tits, if they do my door is always open."
On way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have people at mine but I do build up a friendship first and only invite certain people back. I live with 5 people in a very large house so they may get to meet my housemates. I don’t do one offs so it would only be people I meet regularly. |
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By *uzzy NavelWoman
over a year ago
so near and yet so far.... |
I did in my old house, but this one is very public, I feel like putting signs on the windows about feeding times...lol although it’s not in the rules to be clothed at all times....hoping to move ASAP.
If I feel a connection with someone I’d invite them round..l |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can, doesn't mean I will.
My house is very much a work in non-progress, and something I'm rather embarrassed about.
It's also terraced so cant take the piss with noise levels and I don't want to be worrying about complaints from neighbours.
P |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you accommodate, what checks do you do on the people who you meet and invite into your house?
If you don't accommodate, what would change your mind so that you would? (For example seeing some kind of references.)"
Many factors in place and considered for allowing anyone not just fab meets, into my home. I'm pretty certain I'd not have a 'dirty John' meet off here or anywhere else, I'm pretty wise and to overcautious to be caught off guard or in a vulnerable position.
It takes a lot of ticks to be in 'in' with me and they'd have no idea they were failing or passing the silent tests, before it's to late, for them.
I also have a great wingman and we both have a yet to be used 'red file' plan of action, for any potential mentals. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can, doesn't mean I will.
My house is very much a work in non-progress, and something I'm rather embarrassed about.
It's also terraced so cant take the piss with noise levels and I don't want to be worrying about complaints from neighbours.
P"
haha last girl I was with lived on top floor she said try not to make too much noise the neighbors can hear.... 6 hours of her moaning uncontrollably and the headboard banging against the wall that we tried to stop, the girl just said fuck it and let it happen ..... The neighbours the next morning just looked at us both out the window as we were leaving ... It was awkward for her to talk them after hahaha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn’t accommodate. You see things go wrong too many times on here. I prefer to keep things very separate. "
Do you have any examples, of these things gone wrong? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can, doesn't mean I will.
My house is very much a work in non-progress, and something I'm rather embarrassed about.
It's also terraced so cant take the piss with noise levels and I don't want to be worrying about complaints from neighbours.
P haha last girl I was with lived on top floor she said try not to make too much noise the neighbors can hear.... 6 hours of her moaning uncontrollably and the headboard banging against the wall that we tried to stop, the girl just said fuck it and let it happen ..... The neighbours the next morning just looked at us both out the window as we were leaving ... It was awkward for her to talk them after hahaha "
I’d feel uncomfortable if I was the neighbours |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I make sure they understand that they will need to remove their shoes before entering my homes. Slippers will be provided though "
That reminds me, I have a bag full of hotel slippers to send to you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I make sure they understand that they will need to remove their shoes before entering my homes. Slippers will be provided though "
Can they bring your own slippers? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn’t accommodate. You see things go wrong too many times on here. I prefer to keep things very separate.
Do you have any examples, of these things gone wrong?"
If that person shits on the couch for instance |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I make sure they understand that they will need to remove their shoes before entering my homes. Slippers will be provided though
Can they bring your own slippers?"
Of course I am not a monster |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn’t accommodate. You see things go wrong too many times on here. I prefer to keep things very separate.
Do you have any examples, of these things gone wrong?
If that person shits on the couch for instance "
Could be a gift :/ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I make sure they understand that they will need to remove their shoes before entering my homes. Slippers will be provided though "
I give them a mono slipper, so then they have to hop into my front room. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I make sure they understand that they will need to remove their shoes before entering my homes. Slippers will be provided though
That reminds me, I have a bag full of hotel slippers to send to you. "
Haha we think alike ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My home is my sanctuary really and not somewhere I want fab meets. It would have to be someone pretty special to get in through my front door.
"
Thank you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My home is my sanctuary really and not somewhere I want fab meets. It would have to be someone pretty special to get in through my front door.
"
Stand by for back door joke.
Not by me though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I make sure they understand that they will need to remove their shoes before entering my homes. Slippers will be provided though
Can they bring your own slippers?
Of course I am not a monster "
Good...as they'd be big feet ergo HUGE slippers  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn’t accommodate. You see things go wrong too many times on here. I prefer to keep things very separate.
Do you have any examples, of these things gone wrong?
If that person shits on the couch for instance
Could be a gift :/"
The gift that keeps on giving... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I make sure they understand that they will need to remove their shoes before entering my homes. Slippers will be provided though
That reminds me, I have a bag full of hotel slippers to send to you. "
I'm always on the fence as to if we can take the slippers or not  have I been losing out on nabbing these all along? I feel bereft now  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I used to accommodate when I was on here before. I wouldn't now though unless I knew someone very very well. I was quite naive previously and didn't consider that not everyone is decent, however 'normal' they may first appear. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I make sure they understand that they will need to remove their shoes before entering my homes. Slippers will be provided though
That reminds me, I have a bag full of hotel slippers to send to you.
I'm always on the fence as to if we can take the slippers or not have I been losing out on nabbing these all along? I feel bereft now "
I’m a flight attendant and have stashes of the things. Of course you can take the slippers, they are there for you to use as they can’t reuse again. Now the robes are not for the taking, you will get billed for that as they are re-useable. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn’t accommodate. You see things go wrong too many times on here. I prefer to keep things very separate.
Do you have any examples, of these things gone wrong?
If that person shits on the couch for instance
Could be a gift :/
The gift that keeps on giving..."
Haha don't poke it you'd never know....I've not had a cat for over 3 years now and he only stealth shit once in the 17 years I had him...
But I clearly remember finding it lay dorment like a fecking brown volcano hahaha.
When I used to frequent the chat rooms here, a male friend would ALAWYS say to anyone, I brought on cam "shit behind her sofa when she's not there!" Ah Ah toilet humour at it's best  |
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I’m wary on who I would invite into my home. In fairness though, no more wary of meets from here as I would be from say Tinder or POF. Would want to chat first, then a social meet locally- if we get on then come on in!
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn’t accommodate. You see things go wrong too many times on here. I prefer to keep things very separate.
Do you have any examples, of these things gone wrong?
If that person shits on the couch for instance
Could be a gift :/
The gift that keeps on giving...
Haha don't poke it you'd never know....I've not had a cat for over 3 years now and he only stealth shit once in the 17 years I had him...
But I clearly remember finding it lay dorment like a fecking brown volcano hahaha.
When I used to frequent the chat rooms here, a male friend would ALAWYS say to anyone, I brought on cam "shit behind her sofa when she's not there!" Ah Ah toilet humour at it's best "
That’s bloody hilarious. I love your friend’s humour, that’s something I would probably do. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I make sure they understand that they will need to remove their shoes before entering my homes. Slippers will be provided though
That reminds me, I have a bag full of hotel slippers to send to you.
I'm always on the fence as to if we can take the slippers or not have I been losing out on nabbing these all along? I feel bereft now
I’m a flight attendant and have stashes of the things. Of course you can take the slippers, they are there for you to use as they can’t reuse again. Now the robes are not for the taking, you will get billed for that as they are re-useable. "
Well bowl me over with a wrapped up posh soap!!!...I just thought the towels, etc get washed so why not the slippers. I knew the robes are a no go, as some even have price tags on them as well as cups and lampshades .
I'm taking extra slippers next time to make up for my losses |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m wary on who I would invite into my home. In fairness though, no more wary of meets from here as I would be from say Tinder or POF. Would want to chat first, then a social meet locally- if we get on then come on in!
"
If i wouldn’t let someone enter my home then they sure as hell won’t be entering my body. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you accommodate, what checks do you do on the people who you meet and invite into your house?
If you don't accommodate, what would change your mind so that you would? (For example seeing some kind of references.)"
I don’t accommodate purely because I’m a single dad and my child lives with me. I won’t go to a persons home before meeting them first or video chatting to them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do allow people into my home but only after I've socially met them elsewhere and confident they seem decent. I lock my valuables in the safe and only allow the person I'm meeting in certain rooms. Apart from Adam, who I left in bed munching chocolate whilst I walked the dog. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you accommodate, what checks do you do on the people who you meet and invite into your house?
If you don't accommodate, what would change your mind so that you would? (For example seeing some kind of references.)"
Highly unlikely I would change my mind |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If someone wants to come to mind its only fair I know where they live too. In reality you really need to know who you are actually coming round if someone refuses then its a simple goodbye. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I do allow people into my home but only after I've socially met them elsewhere and confident they seem decent. I lock my valuables in the safe and only allow the person I'm meeting in certain rooms. Apart from Adam, who I left in bed munching chocolate whilst I walked the dog. "
I hope he brought his own chocolate! Mine would be hidden. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If you accommodate, what checks do you do on the people who you meet and invite into your house?
If you don't accommodate, what would change your mind so that you would? (For example seeing some kind of references.)
I don’t accommodate purely because I’m a single dad and my child lives with me. I won’t go to a persons home before meeting them first or video chatting to them "
Men have to be just as careful as women, you never know who is behind the profile... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't accommodate initially because i have very nosey neighbours .. if i have met someone before and i knew them then I would invite someone around"
Good point about nosey neighbours!  |
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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago
.. |
"I wouldn’t accommodate. You see things go wrong too many times on here. I prefer to keep things very separate.
Do you have any examples, of these things gone wrong?"
Yes, jealous, possessive types. People that are practically stalkers.
I wouldn’t blur any lines. My home is my sanctuary. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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But the other day there was a thread where a woman was concerned about her lodger, in case there was an issue. People said she was wrong for judging him and she should give him a chance.
Yet on this thread people are giving reasons why they wouldn't even let a stranger visit their home, which is much less than living there.
Interesting. |
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By *ankie303Woman
over a year ago
Weirdsville South Coast Dorset |
I have amazing neighbour's with shoot guns loaded and ready to go, with a spare key to my front door plus I sleep with an ice pick.
The above maybe true, some true or a total lie but no ones dared attempted to call my bluff and i think it keeps the wrong people away |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can, doesn't mean I will.
My house is very much a work in non-progress, and something I'm rather embarrassed about.
It's also terraced so cant take the piss with noise levels and I don't want to be worrying about complaints from neighbours.
P haha last girl I was with lived on top floor she said try not to make too much noise the neighbors can hear.... 6 hours of her moaning uncontrollably and the headboard banging against the wall that we tried to stop, the girl just said fuck it and let it happen ..... The neighbours the next morning just looked at us both out the window as we were leaving ... It was awkward for her to talk them after hahaha
I’d feel uncomfortable if I was the neighbours "
well for 4 months every weekend they put up with it .... I bet they're happier and have got some peace now that the one I was seeing moved away and we're not seeing eachother anymore ..... Can't believe it's been 1 year already too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"But the other day there was a thread where a woman was concerned about her lodger, in case there was an issue. People said she was wrong for judging him and she should give him a chance.
Yet on this thread people are giving reasons why they wouldn't even let a stranger visit their home, which is much less than living there.
Interesting. "
Aye? Accommodate on here doesn't mean stay for the weekend, bring the dog  It merely means you'd meet at home, or a social somewhere and back to yours/theirs not bring an overnight bag and your pillow. If that womans lodger is looking for accommodation, it's a whole other situation. |
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I wouldn’t want a total stranger in my home, but if I was super tempted I suppose I’d let someone know and find out his car reg, to be honest it’s all a bit too scary for me much better getting to know the person first much more relaxed then |
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"But the other day there was a thread where a woman was concerned about her lodger, in case there was an issue. People said she was wrong for judging him and she should give him a chance.
Yet on this thread people are giving reasons why they wouldn't even let a stranger visit their home, which is much less than living there.
Interesting.
Aye? Accommodate on here doesn't mean stay for the weekend, bring the dog It merely means you'd meet at home, or a social somewhere and back to yours/theirs not bring an overnight bag and your pillow. If that womans lodger is looking for accommodation, it's a whole other situation."
I think a total stranger off the net is much more risky but it’s obviously a shorter period of time
I’d previously did background checks for lodger
Can’t do that on fab, most people give fake names and many lie about details |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have accommodated and our general approach has been:
a: noone unverified.
b: meet in a relatively nearby public place and check for signs of psycho
c: single females only |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I was single and lived alone, I would accommodate. If they're good enough to have sex with I'm OK with them knowing where I live. "
That’s my way of thinking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you accommodate, what checks do you do on the people who you meet and invite into your house?
If you don't accommodate, what would change your mind so that you would? (For example seeing some kind of references.)
#love
Ask if they have a vagina and tits, if they do my door is always open."
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Since my step-son and his girlfriend live at ours, accommodating is a big no.
Even if they weren't there, I wouldn't want to bring people to our home for sex. If I was single
I would consider it if I knew them well. |
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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago
Merseyside |
i never accommodate in my own home, but i own a pub with a flat above it so i accommodate there, but ill speak too them on the phone 1st,and generally prefer their place first or a hotel meet, i pay, then bring them to my pub/flat... |
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I've mainly used hotels, with tight security backup. At mine, I've included neighbors and friends as help before. I'm generally very slow to meet, often taking months getting to know someone - others could be married and divorced in less time I |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
I won't accomodate unless I know someone really well.
In the past I had a guy turn up unannounced one Sunday lunchtime, while I was taking a break from mine. He thought is was ok as he couldn't contact me on fab.!
So I only meet at clubs now. Far safer
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i never accommodate in my own home, but i own a pub with a flat above it so i accommodate there, but ill speak too them on the phone 1st,and generally prefer their place first or a hotel meet, i pay, then bring them to my pub/flat... "
Did you say a pub?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i never accommodate in my own home, but i own a pub with a flat above it so i accommodate there, but ill speak too them on the phone 1st,and generally prefer their place first or a hotel meet, i pay, then bring them to my pub/flat...
Did you say a pub? "
Hahaha! I was just about to say that |
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I'm a single guy so find it easier to arrange meets if i accom. Much easier for the visitor to say "ok I'm done now so I'm leaving" than the awkward moments of them trying to find the words to say "Get out my house".
But I live in a tiny bedsit so prefer to meet at thiers lol |
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"We only accommodate to people we have met before and who like very large dogs. "
Ditto. Only accommodate regular meets but 1 guy I was talking to asked to meet and sd could u put ur dogs away somewhere. Eh.... ye il get them to go to the pub for a couple of hours shall I??  |
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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago
Merseyside |
"i never accommodate in my own home, but i own a pub with a flat above it so i accommodate there, but ill speak too them on the phone 1st,and generally prefer their place first or a hotel meet, i pay, then bring them to my pub/flat...
Did you say a pub? "
yep. little cracker full of characters  |
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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago
Merseyside |
"i never accommodate in my own home, but i own a pub with a flat above it so i accommodate there, but ill speak too them on the phone 1st,and generally prefer their place first or a hotel meet, i pay, then bring them to my pub/flat...
Did you say a pub?
Hahaha! I was just about to say that "
haha... i love it, love to work there myself full time but working on sites keeps me semi sane |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i never accommodate in my own home, but i own a pub with a flat above it so i accommodate there, but ill speak too them on the phone 1st,and generally prefer their place first or a hotel meet, i pay, then bring them to my pub/flat...
Did you say a pub?
yep. little cracker full of characters "
Sounds like my kind of joint. |
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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago
Merseyside |
"i never accommodate in my own home, but i own a pub with a flat above it so i accommodate there, but ill speak too them on the phone 1st,and generally prefer their place first or a hotel meet, i pay, then bring them to my pub/flat...
Did you say a pub?
yep. little cracker full of characters
Sounds like my kind of joint. "
got character and no ego??.... then your welcome anytime! |
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"I won't accomodate unless I know someone really well.
In the past I had a guy turn up unannounced one Sunday lunchtime, while I was taking a break from mine. He thought is was ok as he couldn't contact me on fab.!
So I only meet at clubs now. Far safer
"
Oh my |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I used to accommodate but always made it clear it was just for the sex.. as soon as you catch your breath back.. please leave.
I stopped accommodating when one cockwomble got the train from Huddersfield and assumed he could spend the night at my house even after I'd said no. I sent him packing in a taxi all the way back. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i never accommodate in my own home, but i own a pub with a flat above it so i accommodate there, but ill speak too them on the phone 1st,and generally prefer their place first or a hotel meet, i pay, then bring them to my pub/flat...
Did you say a pub?
yep. little cracker full of characters
Sounds like my kind of joint.
got character and no ego??.... then your welcome anytime! "
Of course. I even find fun in a hotel bar in Nigeria. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a single guy so find it easier to arrange meets if i accom. Much easier for the visitor to say "ok I'm done now so I'm leaving" than the awkward moments of them trying to find the words to say "Get out my house".
But I live in a tiny bedsit so prefer to meet at thiers lol"
LOL ! I used to say just yawn and say.. well that was nice..they usually got the idea |
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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago
Merseyside |
"i never accommodate in my own home, but i own a pub with a flat above it so i accommodate there, but ill speak too them on the phone 1st,and generally prefer their place first or a hotel meet, i pay, then bring them to my pub/flat...
Did you say a pub?
yep. little cracker full of characters
Sounds like my kind of joint.
got character and no ego??.... then your welcome anytime!
Of course. I even find fun in a hotel bar in Nigeria. "
haha well you know were to find me next time your popping up to lovely Liverpool x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well i'm still at home saving for a mortgage so my version of accommodating is paying for a hotel. In that case, it's much easier to vet people since I ccan just have the hotel staff kick someone out if needed.
I'd make sure to hide my wallet if I didn't know them well though just on the off chance they try to grab it and run the mornign after |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
I don't accommodate simply because I "live - in" at work in single quarters that go with my job. I don't mix my private & employment lives
I openly state this in my profile which is accepted by most people. However, some folks have actually suggested me of being married, by not being able to accommodate!
Their problem, not mine! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This is one of the most important discussions in the forums. Safety should be a number 1 concern for all of us because it only takes one time to ruin things. Always be cautious and have things in place if you accommodate at home. I will share some more knowledge on this vital topic another time, but for now...
"I do allow people into my home but only after I've socially met them elsewhere and confident they seem decent. I lock my valuables in the safe and only allow the person I'm meeting in certain rooms. Apart from Adam, who I left in bed munching chocolate whilst I walked the dog. "
Oh... my... lord... ha ha 
Hang on, where are the Mods!? I thought naming and shaming was frowned upon.
This is not as bad as it seems! I am not that filthy! Jeez, okay wait in my defence here is what happened... D said I should make myself feel at home and be comfortable so I was feeling peckish, as you do...
I love my munchies so one thing led to another... and please bare in mind this next bit is crucial... we had that trust "conversation" I said if you leave me alone I cannot be held responsible for what will be consumed... and if in doubt follow the trail of crumbs because you will know exactly where I been ooops so why you had the surprise look on your face when you came back to find me covered with delicious treats I will never know...  
And I washed the dishes!
What you like hey... outing me like that. I don't even know why I can't stop smiling because this is not even funny
Thank you for trusting me and allowing me to empty your fridge. A true friend #Respect 
P.s. You can have a rummage through my cupboards anytime |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is one of the most important discussions in the forums. Safety should be a number 1 concern for all of us because it only takes one time to ruin things. Always be cautious and have things in place if you accommodate at home. I will share some more knowledge on this vital topic another time, but for now...
I do allow people into my home but only after I've socially met them elsewhere and confident they seem decent. I lock my valuables in the safe and only allow the person I'm meeting in certain rooms. Apart from Adam, who I left in bed munching chocolate whilst I walked the dog.
Oh... my... lord... ha ha
Hang on, where are the Mods!? I thought naming and shaming was frowned upon.
This is not as bad as it seems! I am not that filthy! Jeez, okay wait in my defence here is what happened... D said I should make myself feel at home and be comfortable so I was feeling peckish, as you do...
I love my munchies so one thing led to another... and please bare in mind this next bit is crucial... we had that trust "conversation" I said if you leave me alone I cannot be held responsible for what will be consumed... and if in doubt follow the trail of crumbs because you will know exactly where I been ooops so why you had the surprise look on your face when you came back to find me covered with delicious treats I will never know...
And I washed the dishes!
What you like hey... outing me like that. I don't even know why I can't stop smiling because this is not even funny
Thank you for trusting me and allowing me to empty your fridge. A true friend #Respect
P.s. You can have a rummage through my cupboards anytime "
I might just do that x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you accommodate, what checks do you do on the people who you meet and invite into your house?
If you don't accommodate, what would change your mind so that you would? (For example seeing some kind of references.)"
Always meet at a cafe/pub see if there's an energy and take it from there. I don't give anyone I haven't met my address. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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First meet at a gay sauna. Not happy to bring anyone home. I like to think I have a nice home with nice things. I wouldn't want my neighbours to know how filthy I am. |
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