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ladies and gents, fabio proudly presents the 2019 eurovision song contest!

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

must be at least our 10th year of doing this thread....

yes ladies and gents, its that time of year where we all embrace out inner metrosexuality!!!!!!

and one of the best traditions of fab swinging... and as per usual, its the one chance each year you get to call me a big girls blouse... and i just laugh at you!

its the Eurovision song contest thread... 2019 edition!!!!

semi final 1 tonight.... bbc4 8pm.... be there or be an object with 4 equal length sides...

semi final 2.... thursday night

the grand final.... saturday night...8pm bbc1!

rules of the thread... no politics... no taking it too seriously...

all pithy and sarcastic comments welcome!!!!!! songs, outfits, all fair game!

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

yes... The most sarcastic and camp thread of the year is back for the 10th year running... its our anniversary!

ground rules for this year...

No moaning that the "united kingdom gets no points because of politics" save that for another thread.

all comments on songs, singers, dress sense, background dancers and general light-heartedned are welcome....

don't take it too seriously... and get the Abba Wigs out... unless you have long blonde hair already.. you are exempt!!!!

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

its...... time!!!!!!!!

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

And ... whaaaaat?

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

say it in really hushed tones... the UK "might" actually have half a chance this year..........

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Have they all got embarrassing facial warts

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Don't vote folks

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

cyprus first up...

wow those boots are long.... 4 evil "woodies" from toy story dancing in the background...

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"cyprus first up...

wow those boots are long.... 4 evil "woodies" from toy story dancing in the background... "

fabbed

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I'll join you for the final - I like the surprise element.

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

montengro.... oooh... thats a whole load of white... nope...

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here

Oh hellll .... nooooooo...

It’s that time of year again

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

One for the laydees

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Oh hellll .... nooooooo...

It’s that time of year again

"

Not long to the Proms.

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

ooooh... this is a biggie... finland..... that jeans boots combo looks really odd.... i'm drawn to looking at his crotch....

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here


"Oh hellll .... nooooooo...

It’s that time of year again

Not long to the Proms. "

This year is going too quickly .... that said, the quicker Eurovision is over the better

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Poland look like they had an accident in an op shop

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

i think poland have gone for the.... we'll put out any old song "no way can we afford to host"....

if that is fashionable in downtown warsaw.... i am chic!!!

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

Help losing the will to live

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"Help losing the will to live "

yeah... not the best start, why do you think the UK have a fighting chance this year....

slovenia are lulling everyone to sleep.... and not in a good way

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By *wingin CatMan  over a year ago

London

[Removed by poster at 14/05/19 20:35:15]

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere


"Help losing the will to live

yeah... not the best start, why do you think the UK have a fighting chance this year....

slovenia are lulling everyone to sleep.... and not in a good way "

Think I need a drink and ear plugs

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By *wingin CatMan  over a year ago

London

Quote from BBC Newsbeat:

"Iceland's entry to Eurovision 2019 is anti-capitalist, techno performance, BDSM (bondage and discipline, sadism and masochism) band Hatari."

One to definitely look out for.....

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

this isn't getting much better.... lol

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

Friend of a friend of a friend of a friend. Catchy PMSL

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"Friend of a friend of a friend of a friend. Catchy PMSL "
did they Veri each other

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

They fukkin' nicked the NI footie team euro 2016 'dare to dream' slogan...bastids!!

I'm outraged

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Someone nicked this bloke's shoes

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

So far so crap

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

All sound in pain

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Ooo big white shiny boots

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The bellendruskie is hot. Watching with the sound off ...

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere


"The bellendruskie is hot. Watching with the sound off ..."
ear plugs work wonders

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

eastern european urban.....

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

I just watched the French singer being interviewed. Is she trans?

I think Dana International is opening the show on Saturday.

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

oooh.. funky metal jewelry alert..... magnets ahoy!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Milf from Lesbia is hot also

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"I just watched the French singer being interviewed. Is she trans?

I think Dana International is opening the show on Saturday."

one word .. eyebrows

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Never understood it since we invaded Afghanistan its become a political popularity contest singer song be damned for that reason im out

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bellendgium bloke looks like a new romantic Owen Jones....

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

awww. bless.... that jackets is 10 times too big for him....

you know when you were 11 and your mum said "sod it you'll grow into it"..... that!!!

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East


"I just watched the French singer being interviewed. Is she trans?

I think Dana International is opening the show on Saturday.one word .. eyebrows"

Bilal is the new Conchita

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

I'm lost for words. Crying

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Man bun wonky jacket

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

Loves himself

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

okay... we need to have a "man bun" conversation.....

has a "man bun" ever actually suited any man at all..........

leave it long or chop it off......

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"Man bun wonky jacket"
I think he ran out of money..so he's just wearing it as it is

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

I'm tripping

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Pole dancers

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

So Australia is part of europe now...AND they let her dress as the statue of liberty?!... when is the japanese act coming on dressed as machu pichu?

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

Just realised they are on sticks omg

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That's some fanny clench

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

bearing in mind we need ausralia to win this if we ever host this again.... what the!!!

harry potters dementors in the background.... lol

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere


"That's some fanny clench"

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

oh yeah..... bring out the leather!!!! he sounds like a darlek!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Holy fuck...bring out the icelandic gimp

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Ooo mum's gone to Iceland

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

Where's mosh pit

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By *-4pleasureCouple  over a year ago

Belfast


"They fukkin' nicked the NI footie team euro 2016 'dare to dream' slogan...bastids!!

I'm outraged"

Ooooh!

Na na na na na na na na naaaaaaaaa

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

Estonia is not too bad

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

ooooh... very generic.... out of tune on the really high notes......

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"Estonia is not too bad "

Far too normal..lady eye candy though

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere


"Estonia is not too bad

Far too normal..lady eye candy though "

Best one so far

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"Estonia is not too bad

Far too normal..lady eye candy though

Best one so far "

bet you don't remember the song though

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

.... okay.... why is he wearing a plastic beard? can he not grow one like?

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Green goblin plus friend

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

No lol

I'm belly laughing at Portugal

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere


".... okay.... why is he wearing a plastic beard? can he not grow one like?"

This

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


".... okay.... why is he wearing a plastic beard? can he not grow one like?"

no beards please

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

My big strange Greek wedding

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

well... this is "greek"....i am glad the "fencers" got some work...

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

Seriously wtf am I watching

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

The hitman has a song ..na na na

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

oh boy where to start...

1) white suits..... really...... have they ever looked good

2) i might write an entry and see if i can get in for san marino next year.........

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"Seriously wtf am I watching "

You're loving it lol

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere

So he's the best they've got

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere


"Seriously wtf am I watching

You're loving it lol"

I've seriously nearly wet myself. 2 bungalows. I can't cope

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Ooo voting ..but we can't. .

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"Seriously wtf am I watching

You're loving it lol

I've seriously nearly wet myself. 2 bungalows. I can't cope "

I'm wearing a semi. .. detached

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman  over a year ago

somewhere


"Seriously wtf am I watching

You're loving it lol

I've seriously nearly wet myself. 2 bungalows. I can't cope

I'm wearing a semi. .. detached"

When's it on next LMAO

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Ok fabland votes .. it's between black boots girl and white boots girl for me

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Aussie on a stick for third

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

So much snogging

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

So ..white boots and black boots.. Estonia for the ladees..and Aussie on a stick..gimp boy ..the hitman and the tighty whities

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

wow... some shocks in the 10...

San marino made it in!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yaayyy!! The connection to tel aviv went down!!

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"wow... some shocks in the 10...

San marino made it in!!!! "

I'm going to get me a white suit lol

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

I'm really, really hoping the UK wins.

Just imagine . . . we've just left the EU and need to organise a huge jamboree celebrating European culture and diversity!

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

semi final 2 going on now...

ireland have already been up.... nice enough song but quite bland.....

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

I want Ms Moldova's frock

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

More thigh high boots

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

my favourites are up tonight.... i have money on sweden winning the whole darn thing.....

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

This bloke winging it

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

Europop, please, Russia

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

Norway is good.

Hurdy-gurdy!

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Norway's song is proper Eurovision... totally incomprehensible lol but bouncy

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By *abs..Woman  over a year ago

..

Albania actually hurt my ears

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"Norway is good.

Hurdy-gurdy!

"

Dirky dirka

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By *uenevereWoman  over a year ago

Scunthorpe

Just remembered to turn it on and caught Norway...I rather enjoyed it.

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By *mokes n MirrorsCouple  over a year ago

Plymouth and Newcastle (sometimes)

He la e lo lah!!! I like Norway's song and the singer's fit.

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

Mr Azerbjan is rather hunky

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"my favourites are up tonight.... i have money on sweden winning the whole darn thing..... "

The hollish are faves _abio. Even money seems a bit short. What price the swedes?

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

15p on Norway

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

Ooooh, Madonna is gonna be the headline guest!

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Ooooh, Madonna is gonna be the headline guest!"

She's got a new single and tour to promote. But, yes! As long as it isn't Riverdance in reverse for her.

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

think of madonna doing the "half time" slot that justin timberlake did a few years ago...

should be a good night....

oh, and the person who asked me for the odds on sweden.... i got then at the time at 14-1... so not bad....

if you want an not bad each way bet (finish top 4).... italy at 16-1, Iceland (which people are either going to love or hate.. i don't think there will be any middle ground) at 20-1

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

so.... everyone ready?????

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

A little late - I locked myself out!

Did I just see someone wearing one of Stingly's shirts is performing?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’m so excited

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Nothing outlandish or spectacular yet.

Why is the boy group dressed like are from the '60s?

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Have fun ladies and gentlemen...I'm going out

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By *abio OP   Man  over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

this one has grown on me.... catchy pop

wait till you get to san marino..... you'll thank me later!!!!!

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon

When Slovenia come on I might have to watch from behind the sofa. They look like siblings and it’s really unnerving

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

The Russian contestant looks like a friend of mine! I had to do a double take.

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Jean Paul Gaultier is looking good. He always makes me smile.

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here

Liking Denmark

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By *uckOfTheBayMan  over a year ago

Mold


"Liking Denmark

"

She's cute

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Liking Denmark

"

I thought you would. Nice to see you here.

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here


"Liking Denmark

She's cute "

Don’t be crude! I’m talking about the song

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"this one has grown on me.... catchy pop

wait till you get to san marino..... you'll thank me later!!!!!"

Na na na, I'm not ready to thank you yet.

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon

Why does no one pick their skirts up when standing in an Israeli river?

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Why does no one pick their skirts up when standing in an Israeli river?"

It's artistic, innit?

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here

Great voice from North Macedonia

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Sweet boy from Sweden, backed by mamas that look like me.

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"When Slovenia come on I might have to watch from behind the sofa. They look like siblings and it’s really unnerving "

I see what you mean!

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon


"When Slovenia come on I might have to watch from behind the sofa. They look like siblings and it’s really unnerving

I see what you mean!

"

So. Very. Disturbing.

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Now THAT's a Fab outfit.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Imagine looking like her!!! Jesus Christ

Those legs

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.

Fuck it's a bit sexy isn't it? Gosh. Never liked thigh high boots before. Changed my mind now.

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Imagine looking like her!!! Jesus Christ

Those legs "

Those legs are longer than the whole of me.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Is Cyprus in a bondage suit?

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon

There’ll be some people dressed like that in some clubs before long

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"There’ll be some people dressed like that in some clubs before long"

Good!

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon


"Is Cyprus in a bondage suit?"

Wait til you see Iceland

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"There’ll be some people dressed like that in some clubs before long"

I wish I could pull it off.

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

The Netherlands is looking very inviting.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’m still marvelling over Russia’s entry from 2016 lol, was disappointed this year by him, expected so much more lol.

It’s mine and my sons guilty pleasure every year, we sit and do the commentary x

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon

Shag marry avoid her?

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I can imagine Greece's entry in a Disney film. It might just be the staging but it has that vibe.

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here

She needs to change her vocal technique and lose the nasal tone

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon


"I can imagine Greece's entry in a Disney film. It might just be the staging but it has that vibe.

"

I just don’t understand what’s going on though

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I can imagine Greece's entry in a Disney film. It might just be the staging but it has that vibe.

"

Nah Greek women just give that vibe.

Evidence? Worked with two Greek women, went head over heels for both of them.

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I can imagine Greece's entry in a Disney film. It might just be the staging but it has that vibe.

I just don’t understand what’s going on though "

Do you mean, it's all Greek to you?

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon


"I can imagine Greece's entry in a Disney film. It might just be the staging but it has that vibe.

I just don’t understand what’s going on though

Do you mean, it's all Greek to you?

"

Nice

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon

Oo Norway I love this one!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My favourite song

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"My favourite song "

At least it's one you can dance to.

He la le loi la.

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here

Yay! Shout out for Hartlepool Town Hall

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Yay! Shout out for Hartlepool Town Hall "

Aren't we supposed to cheer on the country's best hope?

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here


"Yay! Shout out for Hartlepool Town Hall

Aren't we supposed to cheer on the country's best hope?

"

Yay come on uk

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Our Eurovision winners!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon

Top class ironmongery

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

[Removed by poster at 18/05/19 21:28:57]

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Iceland! They're doing Eurovision properly.

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here

Oh my

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

He needs COVONIA

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

that rates at about 9.5 on my weird shit-o-meter

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Iceland have just sent me on a bad trip

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We have a winner!

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here


"He needs COVONIA"

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Estonia sounds like they sampled all the biggest EDM hits of the last 5 years.

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here

Well Belarus would get invited round for a cup of tea.....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Well Belarus would get invited round for a cup of tea.....

"

She’s 16

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Well Belarus would get invited round for a cup of tea.....

"

Trevor! Concentrate on the voices.

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here


"Well Belarus would get invited round for a cup of tea.....

She’s 16 "

What?

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By *isterPepperMan  over a year ago

Central Swindon

Please not another big event in Baku

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Shut up, shut up it is going to play in my head now.

He can sing and it's poppy enough to be successful.

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here


"Well Belarus would get invited round for a cup of tea.....

Trevor! Concentrate on the voices.

"

Think I had better, yes

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shut up, shut up it is going to play in my head now.

He can sing and it's poppy enough to be successful.

"

and he's cute

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

France looks like someone applied a snapchat filter to me and the girl I set next to at work

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"France looks like someone applied a snapchat filter to me and the girl I set next to at work "

- said on a song about self esteem.

We are all queens!

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I swear that is one of Stingly's shirts.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan  over a year ago

salisbury


"France looks like someone applied a snapchat filter to me and the girl I set next to at work "

I don't know what it was, but id fuck it.

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

WTF was going on with Iceland?!

Loved Norway

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"WTF was going on with Iceland?!

Loved Norway "

Iceland embraced Eurovision and took it to Torture Garden.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan  over a year ago

salisbury


"WTF was going on with Iceland?!

Loved Norway

Iceland embraced Eurovision and took it to Torture Garden.

"

Missed it! Now intrigued.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"France looks like someone applied a snapchat filter to me and the girl I set next to at work

I don't know what it was, but id fuck it."

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here

That’s the winner - Spain

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By *heBirminghamWeekendMan  over a year ago

here

.... uk last.... just a piss take really... time to stop the funding me thinks

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