FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Does anyone else feel a bit lonely doing swinging?
Does anyone else feel a bit lonely doing swinging?
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If you keep it secret from family and friends, I mean? We keep it secret and I just wish I had a friend who also does this so we could share stuff about this lifestyle, experiences, advice and get all the gory details on what you each did over the weekend etc etc.
I have one friend who knows but she's not really interested in what I get up to so she doesn't really want to hear details and stuff. I do this with my husband so obviously he knows everything but it would be nice to have someone els to talk to about it sometimes  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ohhh I think this every other day. I've even tried to get my mates on here so we could talk about something but it does get "lonely" especially being a guy as we have to go through rejection a lot more |
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I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like this. But also sad because other people are lonely too I've said it to my husband before and he was just baffled and like "But why would you WANT to talk about it with anyone else?" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think we all want to communicate with different people about things sometimes.. It's life.
I havent even told anyone I'm using this site, because I'm afraid what they may think of me.
Lol bad boy  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like this. But also sad because other people are lonely too I've said it to my husband before and he was just baffled and like "But why would you WANT to talk about it with anyone else?""
Well I'd love to chat about it to someone else. Not really to compare notes, but to see how they feel, how they're getting on etc.
I think this site is very select, and friendships should be forged. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Feel like friendships are going to be formed on this post
I do hope so!"
I do too.
I have some lovely people on my friends list who I can openly talk to, about ANYTHING.
And yet, we've never met! |
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Also having friends who know can help keep you safe, if you tell them when you have a meet you can say "I'm going to meet someone at X place, if you haven't heard from me by Y time then please call Z." And obviously you do the same for them! |
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"Also having friends who know can help keep you safe, if you tell them when you have a meet you can say "I'm going to meet someone at X place, if you haven't heard from me by Y time then please call Z." And obviously you do the same for them!"
I've often felt unsafe.
Couples have no clue the pressure a guy can feel under just turning up, never mind the rest.
I always turn up but I'm not surprised there are lots who don't |
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We have a few friends who know, some knew us before and we’ve felt comfortable enough to confide in or on quite a few occasions we’ve been recognised, and some who we’ve met here and got to know afterwards! We share experiences etc where suitable, it does help! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like this. But also sad because other people are lonely too I've said it to my husband before and he was just baffled and like "But why would you WANT to talk about it with anyone else?""
I no longer meet but when I did I had no one to talk to about it I have made a few 'fab' friends and they were who I chatted to through a kik group
I am always up for a natter if you want to talk about anything just message me  |
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"I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like this. But also sad because other people are lonely too I've said it to my husband before and he was just baffled and like "But why would you WANT to talk about it with anyone else?"
I no longer meet but when I did I had no one to talk to about it I have made a few 'fab' friends and they were who I chatted to through a kik group
I am always up for a natter if you want to talk about anything just message me "
Thanks Missy I might just do that. Do you mind if I friend request you so I can find you easily? |
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"Also having friends who know can help keep you safe, if you tell them when you have a meet you can say "I'm going to meet someone at X place, if you haven't heard from me by Y time then please call Z." And obviously you do the same for them!
I've often felt unsafe.
Couples have no clue the pressure a guy can feel under just turning up, never mind the rest.
I always turn up but I'm not surprised there are lots who don't "
I can imagine how daunting it is, if me and my husband go to a meet at someone elses house I always feel so nervous, you never know just who is on the other side of the door. We very very rarely go to house meets though, we prefer to meet mainly at our house or clubs. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like this. But also sad because other people are lonely too I've said it to my husband before and he was just baffled and like "But why would you WANT to talk about it with anyone else?"
I no longer meet but when I did I had no one to talk to about it I have made a few 'fab' friends and they were who I chatted to through a kik group
I am always up for a natter if you want to talk about anything just message me
Thanks Missy I might just do that. Do you mind if I friend request you so I can find you easily?"
Sure no problem x |
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By *ewspinMan
over a year ago
Aberdeen |
been On just over a year and told a mate about it but he said it was’nt for him ...few weeks back he said he wanted to give it a go so told him to go for it ...it’s not sleazy or dirty it is what you make of it
Well he’s having a great time and although we don’t go into to much detail we do say when we’ve got meets and if they were nice and would see them again ...so I’d say it is good having a buddy on here to chat about things with  |
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"...
I no longer meet but when I did I had no one to talk to about it I have made a few 'fab' friends and they were who I chatted to through a kik group
"
Interesting....
The other day I saw a kik group advertised on here local to me, by a couple...
"Send your face pic. If we like you we'll chat."
.
.
Oh really? I wouldn't stoop so low.
Unbelievable. |
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"...
I no longer meet but when I did I had no one to talk to about it I have made a few 'fab' friends and they were who I chatted to through a kik group
Interesting....
The other day I saw a kik group advertised on here local to me, by a couple...
"Send your face pic. If we like you we'll chat."
.
.
Oh really? I wouldn't stoop so low.
Unbelievable. "
Jeeeez, I wonder if it's run by the same people who run that fancy swingers club where they don't let you in if they deem you to be ugly or overweight. |
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"...
Jeeeez, I wonder if it's run by the same people who run that fancy swingers club where they don't let you in if they deem you to be ugly or overweight."
I dunno... I don't get to know about such places bein' a fugly n' all.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
I no longer meet but when I did I had no one to talk to about it I have made a few 'fab' friends and they were who I chatted to through a kik group
Interesting....
The other day I saw a kik group advertised on here local to me, by a couple...
"Send your face pic. If we like you we'll chat."
.
.
Oh really? I wouldn't stoop so low.
Unbelievable. "
Nah I wouldn't do that everyone is beautiful in one way or another |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I was single I would tell my friends what I was up to (the most part anyway) but I became the butt of most jokes and always ‘that friend’ of what I had been up too. Now I have Doughnut we share that together and I don’t feel the need to share with our friends lol x |
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"...
Jeeeez, I wonder if it's run by the same people who run that fancy swingers club where they don't let you in if they deem you to be ugly or overweight.
I dunno... I don't get to know about such places bein' a fugly n' all. "
Oh I only know about it because I read a thread about it here in one of the chat rooms. A couple posted that they'd visited, had a good time and the next day they got an email saying they weren't to go back because the wife was overweight and I THINK they commented on the husbands shirt too! They were (quite rightly) outraged at this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
Jeeeez, I wonder if it's run by the same people who run that fancy swingers club where they don't let you in if they deem you to be ugly or overweight.
I dunno... I don't get to know about such places bein' a fugly n' all.
Oh I only know about it because I read a thread about it here in one of the chat rooms. A couple posted that they'd visited, had a good time and the next day they got an email saying they weren't to go back because the wife was overweight and I THINK they commented on the husbands shirt too! They were (quite rightly) outraged at this."
 I have no words |
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So i (S) have 3 people that knows but I don’t mind where M seems to be open about it all his army base knows and most of his mud running friends but if you ever read his story’s of his escort days he is very open on most stuff. |
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By *arlo82Couple
over a year ago
the gym and random places |
The longer you swing the more you'll notice it.
All my friend circle are now swingers. Apart from my bestie of forever (who knows) every WhatsApp chat I have it's a fabber.
So yeah on one hand it can get a bit lonely because unless you blur the lines of fabber to friend it's left pretty isolationary.
Remember you can always chat to us forumites too OP |
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I was introduced to this site by a friend and used to have a couple of other friends on here too. They have since left but when we speak they occasionally ask about site often to see if each other are still on here or they considered returning. Now i stay for chats here and sometimes in chat rooms but finding people who just want friends or chat friends on here I haven't met many but they would be welcome. |
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I think I really only noticed this in the past month. 2 friends passed away suddenly. The first was a friend who I've known through swinging for years, but because he was from that side of my life, I had to hide my grief from friends and family, as I couldn't explain who he was, how I knew him, or share memories and stories. The second was a friend from 'real life', and I could share my grief with friends and family and draw on their support and shared memories to get me through it. The contrast was never so stark as it was with those 2 very different grieving processes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ohhh I think this every other day. I've even tried to get my mates on here so we could talk about something but it does get "lonely" especially being a guy as we have to go through rejection a lot more "
I can imagine it must be pretty soul destroying. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having swung primarily with other men since 40 I have often found it very lonely. Hasty meets and lonely blocks of flats can make it see very lonesome. But I found one woman who has been fantastic. She sends me wonderful messages between meets. |
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"I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like this. But also sad because other people are lonely too I've said it to my husband before and he was just baffled and like "But why would you WANT to talk about it with anyone else?""
most of my friends are In the lifestyle. The ones that aren't know. My family know except my youngest two kids..( I never told my older ones someone else did )
I can imagine it's a bit lonely if you can't talk but for me it's part of who I am. |
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I/We have a few freinds and family (non swingers btw) who know and we can talk freely about it with them. They are very supportive and intrested in what we do. In fact some of them even have come to a club with us to celebrate a special occasion. They were great, stripped down, took part in the games and got into the spirt of the thing even though they did not swing. It nice to have some vanilla freinds who you can be open, honest with and who support what you do without judgement even though it's not their thing. In time we would love to make some good freinds on scene. |
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I see looking back through this thread there's only one respondent anywhere near my neck o' the woods.
It looks like this can show the scarcity of the possibility of a friend to share with... and when that person is a woman she might find it a tad unusual if your not trying to get straight into her knickers.
If she's wearing any at the social you're not going to have. |
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day to day though we have the most wonderful best friends that we met in our fave swingers club, we talk everyday and see each other at least once a week, we go for days out together and have spent holidays together, weirdly most days we talk about everything other than swinging