FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Why are some men so anxious about other guys perving their profile?
Why are some men so anxious about other guys perving their profile?
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Am i the only one that thinks this is odd, so many threads started by men wanting to block other guys from looking, as long as they cant message you then what real difference does it make if they look? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If other guys want to look then so what?.. I don’t want messages from single guys so just have that set.
I personally don’t mind anyone having a look at my bum! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think people feel violated in some way when people they wouldn't want sex with look at their profile.
Couples complain about it too, and women block people who look frequently, even though it isn't doing any harm.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You dont often see women on here complain about other women looking though do you, if other women want to look at me, so be it, no harm done  "
A lot of women are probably looking in stealth though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Even though I'm Bi, I don't really want to be the subject of other men's amorous attention. I find it a little offputting, if I'm brutally honest. Especially when men tend to ignore profile text all together, or worse, read it and message anyway. So cock sure of themselves that they think it doesn't apply to them. I don't like getting crude messages from men, don't particularly want to be seen as an object of desire.. unless it's on my terms. End of.
So I can totally empathise with other men on this issue, Bi or Straight.
It's partially why I struggle with labelling my sexuality on here. I am bi, so I'm honest. I don't want the bi-centric attention that comes with the label though. |
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"You dont often see women on here complain about other women looking though do you, if other women want to look at me, so be it, no harm done
A lot of women are probably looking in stealth though"
Most definitely yes, i know i do, but im just a nosey bugger  |
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"Even though I'm Bi, I don't really want to be the subject of other men's amorous attention. I find it a little offputting, if I'm brutally honest. Especially when men tend to ignore profile text all together, or worse, read it and message anyway. So cock sure of themselves that they think it doesn't apply to them. I don't like getting crude messages from men, don't particularly want to be seen as an object of desire.. unless it's on my terms. End of.
So I can totally empathise with other men on this issue, Bi or Straight.
It's partially why I struggle with labelling my sexuality on here. I am bi, so I'm honest. I don't want the bi-centric attention that comes with the label though."
If they dont message though, does it actually bother you knowing that they look at the profile. I mean straight men can easily block guys from messaging them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am i the only one that thinks this is odd, so many threads started by men wanting to block other guys from looking, as long as they cant message you then what real difference does it make if they look?"
....penis size difference,haha  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Even though I'm Bi, I don't really want to be the subject of other men's amorous attention. I find it a little offputting, if I'm brutally honest. Especially when men tend to ignore profile text all together, or worse, read it and message anyway. So cock sure of themselves that they think it doesn't apply to them. I don't like getting crude messages from men, don't particularly want to be seen as an object of desire.. unless it's on my terms. End of.
So I can totally empathise with other men on this issue, Bi or Straight.
It's partially why I struggle with labelling my sexuality on here. I am bi, so I'm honest. I don't want the bi-centric attention that comes with the label though.
If they dont message though, does it actually bother you knowing that they look at the profile. I mean straight men can easily block guys from messaging them."
This!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Even though I'm Bi, I don't really want to be the subject of other men's amorous attention. I find it a little offputting, if I'm brutally honest. Especially when men tend to ignore profile text all together, or worse, read it and message anyway. So cock sure of themselves that they think it doesn't apply to them. I don't like getting crude messages from men, don't particularly want to be seen as an object of desire.. unless it's on my terms. End of.
So I can totally empathise with other men on this issue, Bi or Straight.
It's partially why I struggle with labelling my sexuality on here. I am bi, so I'm honest. I don't want the bi-centric attention that comes with the label though.
If they dont message though, does it actually bother you knowing that they look at the profile. I mean straight men can easily block guys from messaging them."
Sometimes. A fab AND a wink is irritating as that's trying to get my attention regardless. A solitary fab.. maybe not. Though if I had the option of being able to block all men from seeing my profile, bar the ones I invited in.. I would.
If men behaved more like women do on here, I'd be less bothered by it. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Doesn't bother me in the slightest who looks at me - in fact I often suggest that guys who are looking for profile advice look at other well verified guys profiles for inspiration, likewise those who don't know what pictures to post |
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I equate it to real life. I think a straight guy would feel uncomfortable if men looked at him a lot in the street or in a club.
It's understandable and people are entitled to feel discomfort without their discomfort being dismissed in my opinion. This happens to women a lot when they express discomfort about the way some men behave around them and it's wrong it shouldn't be happening to men either.
That said it's not possible to tell if someone is straight or otherwise until you look. |
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"That said it's not possible to tell if someone is straight or otherwise until you look."
Even then, do you really know? I could not tell a persons sexuality just by looking at them. Might have a good guess in some cases but would often get it wrong, I suspect...!! |
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"Am i the only one that thinks this is odd, so many threads started by men wanting to block other guys from looking, as long as they cant message you then what real difference does it make if they look?"
Personally I don't care one bit. In fact it's kind of flattering, because deep down inside we all want to feel attractive don't we? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sometimes its down to insecurity with their masculinity..
I find most 'sorted'guys like the attention and state their case with clarity..
"
Are you suggesting I'm insecure and not 'sorted' then? |
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"You dont often see women on here complain about other women looking though do you, if other women want to look at me, so be it, no harm done
A lot of women are probably looking in stealth though"
Have to love stealth mode ... a perv's paradise ... erm ... cough ... so I've heard   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some bloke clearly read what I wrote and took it upon himself to irritate on purpose by fabbing everything he could. Timings match perfectly. I don't get people like that, something not quite right about them. You know who you are. |
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"Sometimes its down to insecurity with their masculinity..
I find most 'sorted'guys like the attention and state their case with clarity..
Are you suggesting I'm insecure and not 'sorted' then? "
I said sometimes, only you know how you feel. |
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You see it in real life too.
Men perv on women, oh, it's just a compliment, don't be so uppity.
Gay man glances at that same man who thinks women should get over themselves. Omg call the police! The violation! The outrage! Omg! |
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I have no issues about who looks at me or messages me as long as they are respectful.
What does get me is ones who look at you often couples) and when you go to message them and they have blocked single men. Ah well. |
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"I have no issues about who looks at me or messages me as long as they are respectful.
What does get me is ones who look at you often couples) and when you go to message them and they have blocked single men. Ah well."
They're looking to see if they want to message you? |
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"I have no issues about who looks at me or messages me as long as they are respectful.
What does get me is ones who look at you often couples) and when you go to message them and they have blocked single men. Ah well.
They're looking to see if they want to message you? "
But if they state they are not looking for single men? And none of their veris are from single men? I dont think I'm going to be the exception that proves the rule... |
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"I have no issues about who looks at me or messages me as long as they are respectful.
What does get me is ones who look at you often couples) and when you go to message them and they have blocked single men. Ah well.
They're looking to see if they want to message you?
But if they state they are not looking for single men? And none of their veris are from single men? I dont think I'm going to be the exception that proves the rule..."
Views mean absolutely nothing. Don't dwell. |
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"You see it in real life too.
Men perv on women, oh, it's just a compliment, don't be so uppity.
Gay man glances at that same man who thinks women should get over themselves. Omg call the police! The violation! The outrage! Omg! "
This.
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"I have no issues about who looks at me or messages me as long as they are respectful.
What does get me is ones who look at you often couples) and when you go to message them and they have blocked single men. Ah well.
They're looking to see if they want to message you?
But if they state they are not looking for single men? And none of their veris are from single men? I dont think I'm going to be the exception that proves the rule...
Views mean absolutely nothing. Don't dwell. "
I'm not, but to be fair you are looking at it from the point of view of someone who gets literally hundreds of view in a day, as opposed to my single figure count.
I'm not moaning- just making an observervation |
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"I have no issues about who looks at me or messages me as long as they are respectful.
What does get me is ones who look at you often couples) and when you go to message them and they have blocked single men. Ah well.
They're looking to see if they want to message you?
But if they state they are not looking for single men? And none of their veris are from single men? I dont think I'm going to be the exception that proves the rule...
Views mean absolutely nothing. Don't dwell.
I'm not, but to be fair you are looking at it from the point of view of someone who gets literally hundreds of view in a day, as opposed to my single figure count.
I'm not moaning- just making an observervation"
Yes, but I still see patterns. That guy who looks at me 20 times a day, at least. Will he ever message? What's his deal? It's weird. But, whatever.
It applies no matter how many messages or views you get. Control what you can, don't sweat the rest. |
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"I have no issues about who looks at me or messages me as long as they are respectful.
What does get me is ones who look at you often couples) and when you go to message them and they have blocked single men. Ah well.
They're looking to see if they want to message you?
But if they state they are not looking for single men? And none of their veris are from single men? I dont think I'm going to be the exception that proves the rule..."
I'm not looking interested in couples, but I might have a a nose at a profile. Say, look through their pictures if the lady half looks attractive, or if they've said something interesting in the forum I might be curious to see who they are and what they're about. It doesn't mean I want to Eiffel Tower, it means I'm nosey.
You'll drive yourself mental reading too much into everything. |
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I'm always curious as why people obsess about who's viewed them..
If people have viewed and are interested they'll be in touch otherwise, no harm no foul.
Don't even start me on the "how many views threads"  |
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By *hangerMan
over a year ago
brighton |
I believe that guys blocking all other guys looking at their profile do it primarily for two reasons:
1) They feel it is an affront to their masculinity and somehow makes them gay, possibly due to insecurities that they may not even realise they have!
2) They get loads of messages from guys and are fed up answering them when they have no interest sexually in guys.
Personally, I am fine with other guys looking at my pics and messaging me if they wish. Being bi helps! Probably about 90% of my messages are from guys, so it would get a bit lonely if I blocked them all! lol
Of course, blocking age ranges, or individuals is quite different. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You see it in real life too.
Men perv on women, oh, it's just a compliment, don't be so uppity.
Gay man glances at that same man who thinks women should get over themselves. Omg call the police! The violation! The outrage! Omg! "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To be honest when I first joined, I sort of felt the same about other guys viewing me as time has gone on it doesn't bother me in the slightest it's not as though I'm going to switch sides
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Toxic masculinity plays a part sometimes.
I don't care who looks at my profile and/or who messages me.
But I do draw the line when a guy messages something sexual, to which I will tell them I'm not interested and they completely ignore me.
I would say 80% of my profile views are from men. |
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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago
mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds |
"Am i the only one that thinks this is odd, so many threads started by men wanting to block other guys from looking, as long as they cant message you then what real difference does it make if they look?"
Couples and ladies have and do ask about this as well.. its not a gender specific topic.
There will be things that you may prefer not to happen that others may think 'odde' ..its what makes us individuals.
You'd need to ask the originators of the thread to find out why it bothers them.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What harm can looking do if your not interested in the person looking just say no thanks "
But it when it flashes up you have 2 new messages I get all excited about someone replying or even maybe an out of the blue mesaage from woman....then open them to find its men again- like thinking tour lottery ticket has come in but it hasn't! |
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"Toxic masculinity plays a part sometimes.
I don't care who looks at my profile and/or who messages me.
But I do draw the line when a guy messages something sexual, to which I will tell them I'm not interested and they completely ignore me.
I would say 80% of my profile views are from men. "
Completely agree. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I didn’t have guys looking at my profile I wouldn’t have any views "
Most women use the privacy option of not showing on people's 'looked at me' list. You'd never know if 1 or 1,000 women had looked.
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"If I didn’t have guys looking at my profile I wouldn’t have any views
Most women use the privacy option of not showing on people's 'looked at me' list. You'd never know if 1 or 1,000 women had looked.
"
And because most women won’t ‘Fab’ your pics for fear of it being assumed a ‘come on’, again, the blokes looking for female attention are left in the dark |
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"If I didn’t have guys looking at my profile I wouldn’t have any views
Most women use the privacy option of not showing on people's 'looked at me' list. You'd never know if 1 or 1,000 women had looked.
"
This I view in Stealth mode with some guys who viewed me, if you don't that's when they message. However if I show up on your views it's probably because I'm interested but seen that you haven't put a Tgirl as a potential meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I didn’t have guys looking at my profile I wouldn’t have any views
Most women use the privacy option of not showing on people's 'looked at me' list. You'd never know if 1 or 1,000 women had looked.
"
Well true but if there was a 1000 I’d hope at least one would find me attractive enough to make contact of some kind lol |
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"I have no issues about who looks at me or messages me as long as they are respectful.
What does get me is ones who look at you often couples) and when you go to message them and they have blocked single men. Ah well.
They're looking to see if they want to message you?
But if they state they are not looking for single men? And none of their veris are from single men? I dont think I'm going to be the exception that proves the rule...
I'm not looking interested in couples, but I might have a a nose at a profile. Say, look through their pictures if the lady half looks attractive, or if they've said something interesting in the forum I might be curious to see who they are and what they're about. It doesn't mean I want to Eiffel Tower, it means I'm nosey.
You'll drive yourself mental reading too much into everything. "
Thanks for the advice, but I'm not reading anything into it and it's a long way from driving me mental. I am more more than happy with my Fab experience. It's just a minor irritant |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I didn’t have guys looking at my profile I wouldn’t have any views
Most women use the privacy option of not showing on people's 'looked at me' list. You'd never know if 1 or 1,000 women had looked.
Well true but if there was a 1000 I’d hope at least one would find me attractive enough to make contact of some kind lol"
Yeah sorry, I did think I should have said 1 or 10. If 1000 looked and didn't mail that would be crap. X
I'll put my spade away now. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I didn’t have guys looking at my profile I wouldn’t have any views
Most women use the privacy option of not showing on people's 'looked at me' list. You'd never know if 1 or 1,000 women had looked.
This I view in Stealth mode with some guys who viewed me, if you don't that's when they message. However if I show up on your views it's probably because I'm interested but seen that you haven't put a Tgirl as a potential meet. "
Not sure if you know, but if you go out of stealth mode, everyone you've looked at (ever) can see you on their looked at me list. Not just the one you're currently viewing.  |
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"If I didn’t have guys looking at my profile I wouldn’t have any views
Most women use the privacy option of not showing on people's 'looked at me' list. You'd never know if 1 or 1,000 women had looked.
This I view in Stealth mode with some guys who viewed me, if you don't that's when they message. However if I show up on your views it's probably because I'm interested but seen that you haven't put a Tgirl as a potential meet.
Not sure if you know, but if you go out of stealth mode, everyone you've looked at (ever) can see you on their looked at me list. Not just the one you're currently viewing. "
 Doh !!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The problem is so many guys on here set their profile to straight. And they are not. I’ve had so many “straight “ guys message me asking me to just their dick. So as a gay guy it’s hard to know who is rally straight and who is fab straight. |
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