FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Doesn't that put people off?!
Doesn't that put people off?!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Was discussing swinging with a lady on another website this evening and she was asking how I felt about meeting at first, nerves, confidence etc... I opened up a little about how I had very little confidence back then and how oddly now, after certain things I've been through, I have much more. I used the scars I have on and around my breasts (post cancer) as an example.
She seemed very confused and immediately asked "wow, doesn't that put people off you?!"
I mean, if it did, I wouldn't want to meet them and it certainly wouldn't put me off someone else, but it got me thinking... does that kinda thing put you off meeting someone?
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"Was discussing swinging with a lady on another website this evening and she was asking how I felt about meeting at first, nerves, confidence etc... I opened up a little about how I had very little confidence back then and how oddly now, after certain things I've been through, I have much more. I used the scars I have on and around my breasts (post cancer) as an example.
She seemed very confused and immediately asked "wow, doesn't that put people off you?!"
I mean, if it did, I wouldn't want to meet them and it certainly wouldn't put me off someone else, but it got me thinking... does that kinda thing put you off meeting someone?
"
No
Why should it your a survivor, something to be proud off and show off.
Not all of us have the visible scars room say we beat cancer.
Embrace them x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Was discussing swinging with a lady on another website this evening and she was asking how I felt about meeting at first, nerves, confidence etc... I opened up a little about how I had very little confidence back then and how oddly now, after certain things I've been through, I have much more. I used the scars I have on and around my breasts (post cancer) as an example.
She seemed very confused and immediately asked "wow, doesn't that put people off you?!"
I mean, if it did, I wouldn't want to meet them and it certainly wouldn't put me off someone else, but it got me thinking... does that kinda thing put you off meeting someone?
No
Why should it your a survivor, something to be proud off and show off.
Not all of us have the visible scars room say we beat cancer.
Embrace them x "
I hated them at first, I think that was more due to the memories they brought with them. Now, they don't bother me at all, I don't hide them anymore and I'm pretty proud to tell people I kicked cancer's ass when they ask how I got them   |
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Definitely not, everyone has their scars and past, makes them who they are
For those that it does bother, I wouldn’t bother with personally, as I would see them as shallow and unable to look past outside markers
We are who we are and if people don’t like us, that’s their problem not ours. Just be yourselves |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"Was discussing swinging with a lady on another website this evening and she was asking how I felt about meeting at first, nerves, confidence etc... I opened up a little about how I had very little confidence back then and how oddly now, after certain things I've been through, I have much more. I used the scars I have on and around my breasts (post cancer) as an example.
She seemed very confused and immediately asked "wow, doesn't that put people off you?!"
I mean, if it did, I wouldn't want to meet them and it certainly wouldn't put me off someone else, but it got me thinking... does that kinda thing put you off meeting someone?
No
Why should it your a survivor, something to be proud off and show off.
Not all of us have the visible scars room say we beat cancer.
Embrace them x
I hated them at first, I think that was more due to the memories they brought with them. Now, they don't bother me at all, I don't hide them anymore and I'm pretty proud to tell people I kicked cancer's ass when they ask how I got them "
Good for you x x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No i adore things like scars on the skin i love the texture change and the look butits not just scars anything that makes people an individual little sexy freckles birthmarks little details and it all tells a story |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I suppose it would depend on the circumstances. For example if someone had scars they had misled a potential meet about it might put me off. For example a facial scar that was not visible in a face pic either because the pic was old or had been photoshopped and the other person had not mentioned it beforehand I might be a bit surprised which could put me off.
Though it's more that I would feel tricked or misled than the scars themselves. |
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By *ED00Woman
over a year ago
South Devon... Torbaydos |
This is such an interesting post for me. I'm reasonably new to this scene and since joining this site I have met a few guys, some good, some not so, and a couple bloody fantastic, but that's for an other thread. Anyway, I've never been confident, I'm a larger lady with 3 small scars and 1 nasty huge scar all of which are on my tummy, that I am very self conscious of. I always feel the need to tell guys that I'm a big girl and I don't do naked. Now when reading this post it's made me think about this and why I do it. I've never met anyone who has commented on my scars, and I've been baffled by the positive comments I've had about being a curvy girl. I guess we all have hang ups... I just need to learn not to let them hols me back. Xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do not have an issue with scars or disabilities as long as I have been made aware of them beforehand. I have enough scars of my own not to be worried about others. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"This is such an interesting post for me. I'm reasonably new to this scene and since joining this site I have met a few guys, some good, some not so, and a couple bloody fantastic, but that's for an other thread. Anyway, I've never been confident, I'm a larger lady with 3 small scars and 1 nasty huge scar all of which are on my tummy, that I am very self conscious of. I always feel the need to tell guys that I'm a big girl and I don't do naked. Now when reading this post it's made me think about this and why I do it. I've never met anyone who has commented on my scars, and I've been baffled by the positive comments I've had about being a curvy girl. I guess we all have hang ups... I just need to learn not to let them hols me back. Xxx"
I used to feel exactly the same!
Let your confidence grow and embrace all your bits (for want of a better word) |
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By *ason.Man
over a year ago
west yorkshire |
Try a naturist holiday
Bit strange at first then you realise no body has body image issues big small scars disability’s and no body bars an eye lid
Made me more at ease with my body think everyone should give it try |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
Nope, i have scars from surgery and a strawberry birthmark, doesn’t bother me at all nor does anyone elses’s bother me.
If they’re naked then i’m too busy eyeing up their trousersnake!!
I like to ask how they got their scars, because i’m nosey, forgetting that some can be a bit sensitive about it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Try a naturist holiday
Bit strange at first then you realise no body has body image issues big small scars disability’s and no body bars an eye lid
Made me more at ease with my body think everyone should give it try "
I don't think that'd be something I'm into tbh.
I definitely feel comfortable being naked with my other half now and I don't feel the need to stay covered up with those I play with anymore, that's enough for me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've stated on my bio I've got scars as at first I was really nervous about others seeing them without warning. Over time I've learned that it's just me they bother and the people I have met don't bat an eyelid. That was a learning curve for me to be honest |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
It's interesting that this thread has appeared at the same time as Mollypop has questioned the term unconventionally beautiful. What is beautiful is not what is perfect, its the unique 'flaws' that often make something special and beautiful.
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By *ason.Man
over a year ago
west yorkshire |
"Try a naturist holiday
Bit strange at first then you realise no body has body image issues big small scars disability’s and no body bars an eye lid
Made me more at ease with my body think everyone should give it try
I don't think that'd be something I'm into tbh.
I definitely feel comfortable being naked with my other half now and I don't feel the need to stay covered up with those I play with anymore, that's enough for me "
That’s fantastic news
Get on enjoy your fun times without you feeling uncomfortable.
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By *ason.Man
over a year ago
west yorkshire |
"I've stated on my bio I've got scars as at first I was really nervous about others seeing them without warning. Over time I've learned that it's just me they bother and the people I have met don't bat an eyelid. That was a learning curve for me to be honest "
Exactly my thoughts too
If they do have a problem it’s there problem not yours x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Stretch marks,scars,wobbly bits we all have them and if someone we are going to meet is put off by them then they aren't worth meeting in the first place!!! |
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"It's interesting that this thread has appeared at the same time as Mollypop has questioned the term unconventionally beautiful. What is beautiful is not what is perfect, its the unique 'flaws' that often make something special and beautiful.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, not at all. I have a scar on the left side of my chest from heart surgery when I was 6 and I have an indentation in my breastbone that I was born with and I've met lovely people who were never put off by them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Was discussing swinging with a lady on another website this evening and she was asking how I felt about meeting at first, nerves, confidence etc... I opened up a little about how I had very little confidence back then and how oddly now, after certain things I've been through, I have much more. I used the scars I have on and around my breasts (post cancer) as an example.
She seemed very confused and immediately asked "wow, doesn't that put people off you?!"
I mean, if it did, I wouldn't want to meet them and it certainly wouldn't put me off someone else, but it got me thinking... does that kinda thing put you off meeting someone?
"
Sorry this is a bit off topic and light hearted, I read your post and was totally confused.
Made more sense when I read it again and realised it said swinging not singing!
With all the respect in the world x |
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