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When I grow up....
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently? "
I was in such a rush to grow up as a kid...some bits are good, mostly very stressful though!
My life hasn't exactly gone to my original plan...but atm it isn't half bad and I have a new, more exciting plan  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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From where I came from, and what childhood I experienced, I am a very happy chilled bunny. I had no expectations of what adulthood would be, I just presumed I would survive somehow. All good  |
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By *andonmessMan
over a year ago
A world all of his own |
"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently? "
It's a damn sight harder work than I thought it'd be lol, but yeah, I'm happy with my lot |
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"What is this growing up you speak of???
It just happened to me  "
In seriousness... not sure what I expected
But in my adult life ... some bits have been great .. other things have sucked big time
Am I where I thought I'd be ... no
Am I in a good place .. yes
It is what you make it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
I was in such a rush to grow up as a kid...some bits are good, mostly very stressful though!
My life hasn't exactly gone to my original plan...but atm it isn't half bad and I have a new, more exciting plan "
New and exciting sounds good!
I think I have always been a bit lost and just lived in the moment, I never wanted to be older and never had a plan |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t know what I saw for myself, I do know it wasn’t this. I do wish I could have changed some things but then I wouldn’t have my children.
As for being happy, yes In many respects I am, just wish I was financially secure. X |
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"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently? "
Might have split up with ex a bit sooner but otherwise no. I'm good with now me, still not learned to Adult properly tho. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think it's an ongoing process.
It's a hell of a lot better than being a kid. "
I agree. I know that even now my parents are still changing as people, I guess it's all about life stages and adjusting to those.
I miss being a kid! |
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With the benefit of hindsight there's several things I would have done differently The biggest would have been following my instincts as a teenager and taking the trans path.Doubtful then that I would have got married , or if I did it would be to someone more understanding. Work choices would probably have been different too in that scenario, but I was badly assaulted when I was 17 and as a result I packed my true self away for far too many years
So really ,Clare hasn't properly grown up, she's still that wide eyed 20 year old,I just wish someone would tell my poor aching bones! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"From where I came from, and what childhood I experienced, I am a very happy chilled bunny. I had no expectations of what adulthood would be, I just presumed I would survive somehow. All good "
 all good indeed |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
It's a damn sight harder work than I thought it'd be lol, but yeah, I'm happy with my lot "
And to think we used to complain about being made to tidy our rooms! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"What is this growing up you speak of???
It just happened to me
In seriousness... not sure what I expected
But in my adult life ... some bits have been great .. other things have sucked big time
Am I where I thought I'd be ... no
Am I in a good place .. yes
It is what you make it"
I guess that's all that matters, being happy with what you do have rather than thinking about what you don't. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m enjoying a second youth as I constrained so much of mine by pretending to be a good boy and feeling guilty when I wasn’t. I may one day become an adult  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don’t know what I saw for myself, I do know it wasn’t this. I do wish I could have changed some things but then I wouldn’t have my children.
As for being happy, yes In many respects I am, just wish I was financially secure. X "
That's one of the things you just don't think about as a kid, money is such a big part of life as an adult. When I was young my parents barely scraped by every month but I was completely unaware, I was happy. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
Might have split up with ex a bit sooner but otherwise no. I'm good with now me, still not learned to Adult properly tho."
I think it's an ongoing process, when you finally learn it all you die so don't try too hard! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't say I'm grown up I just adult when I need to, if it can be avoided I mostly do that. I look at the back of my hands sometimes and they remind me I'm no longer 17 though  life's made of chapters and I'm hoping to embark on a new one soon. Which always helps with the plot twists that are thrown at us through our lifespan. |
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"What is this growing up you speak of???
It just happened to me
In seriousness... not sure what I expected
But in my adult life ... some bits have been great .. other things have sucked big time
Am I where I thought I'd be ... no
Am I in a good place .. yes
It is what you make it
I guess that's all that matters, being happy with what you do have rather than thinking about what you don't. "
I have Red and will be moving into our own house together soon .. what not to be happy about |
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By *andonmessMan
over a year ago
A world all of his own |
"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
It's a damn sight harder work than I thought it'd be lol, but yeah, I'm happy with my lot
And to think we used to complain about being made to tidy our rooms! "
So bloody true. Youth is wasted on the young and all that... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What is this growing up you speak of???
It just happened to me
In seriousness... not sure what I expected
But in my adult life ... some bits have been great .. other things have sucked big time
Am I where I thought I'd be ... no
Am I in a good place .. yes
It is what you make it
I guess that's all that matters, being happy with what you do have rather than thinking about what you don't.
I have Red and will be moving into our own house together soon .. what not to be happy about "
Ooh exciting hope the move goes really well x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
It's a damn sight harder work than I thought it'd be lol, but yeah, I'm happy with my lot
And to think we used to complain about being made to tidy our rooms!
So bloody true. Youth is wasted on the young and all that..."
Hence I’m having a second one  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"With the benefit of hindsight there's several things I would have done differently The biggest would have been following my instincts as a teenager and taking the trans path.Doubtful then that I would have got married , or if I did it would be to someone more understanding. Work choices would probably have been different too in that scenario, but I was badly assaulted when I was 17 and as a result I packed my true self away for far too many years
So really ,Clare hasn't properly grown up, she's still that wide eyed 20 year old,I just wish someone would tell my poor aching bones!"
It's horrible that someone else made those decisions for you by their actions. It must feel so liberating to finally be allowing yourself to be you though? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What is this growing up you speak of???
It just happened to me
In seriousness... not sure what I expected
But in my adult life ... some bits have been great .. other things have sucked big time
Am I where I thought I'd be ... no
Am I in a good place .. yes
It is what you make it
I guess that's all that matters, being happy with what you do have rather than thinking about what you don't.
I have Red and will be moving into our own house together soon .. what not to be happy about "
Woop woop. How exciting |
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"What is this growing up you speak of???
It just happened to me
In seriousness... not sure what I expected
But in my adult life ... some bits have been great .. other things have sucked big time
Am I where I thought I'd be ... no
Am I in a good place .. yes
It is what you make it
I guess that's all that matters, being happy with what you do have rather than thinking about what you don't.
I have Red and will be moving into our own house together soon .. what not to be happy about
Ooh exciting hope the move goes really well x"
Thanks ... have to wait for them to finish building the thing first |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I’m enjoying a second youth as I constrained so much of mine by pretending to be a good boy and feeling guilty when I wasn’t. I may one day become an adult "
Just don't regress to the nappy stage. I know some people are into that |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Oh I do remember what I was dreaming of how I would be in the year 2000 when I was in 1970/80s. Definitely not the way I planned but I'm contented nonetheless."
Content is a good thing. A lot of people never feel that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don’t know what I saw for myself, I do know it wasn’t this. I do wish I could have changed some things but then I wouldn’t have my children.
As for being happy, yes In many respects I am, just wish I was financially secure. X
That's one of the things you just don't think about as a kid, money is such a big part of life as an adult. When I was young my parents barely scraped by every month but I was completely unaware, I was happy. "
Exactly, I don’t know how I expected to live but I thought I’d be better off than I am. It’s a scary thought that the little I have could be taken away so quickly. I don’t think we prepare children for the harsh realities of adult life enough x |
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"This is going to sound awful, but I never expected to get here. My childhood was so shit.
Are you proud that you have got here? "
Oh god yes. Maybe not where I am, but it's the journey, not the destination. Sometimes carrying on despite it all is the strongest thing you can do. (God that sounds clichéd)
I smiled reading another thread about mouthy shitty teenagers. It was that rebellious attitude that's helped me survive. "fuck you too, I'll try anyway" is almost in my blood. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I wouldn't say I'm grown up I just adult when I need to, if it can be avoided I mostly do that. I look at the back of my hands sometimes and they remind me I'm no longer 17 though life's made of chapters and I'm hoping to embark on a new one soon. Which always helps with the plot twists that are thrown at us through our lifespan."
Yeah they didn't prepare us for body changes!
I like the chapters analogy, it must help to think that a hard time isn't gonna last forever, you just need to wait for the page to turn. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"What is this growing up you speak of???
It just happened to me
In seriousness... not sure what I expected
But in my adult life ... some bits have been great .. other things have sucked big time
Am I where I thought I'd be ... no
Am I in a good place .. yes
It is what you make it
I guess that's all that matters, being happy with what you do have rather than thinking about what you don't.
I have Red and will be moving into our own house together soon .. what not to be happy about "
You're a lucky man! X |
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"With the benefit of hindsight there's several things I would have done differently The biggest would have been following my instincts as a teenager and taking the trans path.Doubtful then that I would have got married , or if I did it would be to someone more understanding. Work choices would probably have been different too in that scenario, but I was badly assaulted when I was 17 and as a result I packed my true self away for far too many years
So really ,Clare hasn't properly grown up, she's still that wide eyed 20 year old,I just wish someone would tell my poor aching bones!
It's horrible that someone else made those decisions for you by their actions. It must feel so liberating to finally be allowing yourself to be you though? "
It's liberating to a degree but I'm still very conscious of the fact that my wife tolerates rather than embraces Clare, so it can never be a totally open thing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’m enjoying a second youth as I constrained so much of mine by pretending to be a good boy and feeling guilty when I wasn’t. I may one day become an adult
Just don't regress to the nappy stage. I know some people are into that "
No I was look after well when I was a baby. I just didn’t discover the rebel in me until much later |
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By *an_LexaCouple
over a year ago
Sunderland |
Sometimes I forget I’m a grown up. I see people I went to school with and think, “god you’re a woman”
Life is hard at times when you have to adult though, so I make the most of the carefree times with a childlike excitement.
Lex |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don’t know what I saw for myself, I do know it wasn’t this. I do wish I could have changed some things but then I wouldn’t have my children.
As for being happy, yes In many respects I am, just wish I was financially secure. X
That's one of the things you just don't think about as a kid, money is such a big part of life as an adult. When I was young my parents barely scraped by every month but I was completely unaware, I was happy.
Exactly, I don’t know how I expected to live but I thought I’d be better off than I am. It’s a scary thought that the little I have could be taken away so quickly. I don’t think we prepare children for the harsh realities of adult life enough x "
I know they have started to introduce more money management skills into schools but I'm not sure it's enough.
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"This is going to sound awful, but I never expected to get here. My childhood was so shit.
Are you proud that you have got here?
Oh god yes. Maybe not where I am, but it's the journey, not the destination. Sometimes carrying on despite it all is the strongest thing you can do. (God that sounds clichéd)
I smiled reading another thread about mouthy shitty teenagers. It was that rebellious attitude that's helped me survive. "fuck you too, I'll try anyway" is almost in my blood. "
That's the thing, it's fight or flight. Face things and deal with them in whatever way you can or just give up. Giving up seems much harder to deal with and has little to no chance of feeling accomplished at the end. |
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"This is going to sound awful, but I never expected to get here. My childhood was so shit.
Are you proud that you have got here?
Oh god yes. Maybe not where I am, but it's the journey, not the destination. Sometimes carrying on despite it all is the strongest thing you can do. (God that sounds clichéd)
I smiled reading another thread about mouthy shitty teenagers. It was that rebellious attitude that's helped me survive. "fuck you too, I'll try anyway" is almost in my blood.
That's the thing, it's fight or flight. Face things and deal with them in whatever way you can or just give up. Giving up seems much harder to deal with and has little to no chance of feeling accomplished at the end. "
Giving up would have been easier (and yes I'm being grim). But I'm a stubborn shit, and I adore proving people wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"With the benefit of hindsight there's several things I would have done differently The biggest would have been following my instincts as a teenager and taking the trans path.Doubtful then that I would have got married , or if I did it would be to someone more understanding. Work choices would probably have been different too in that scenario, but I was badly assaulted when I was 17 and as a result I packed my true self away for far too many years
So really ,Clare hasn't properly grown up, she's still that wide eyed 20 year old,I just wish someone would tell my poor aching bones!
It's horrible that someone else made those decisions for you by their actions. It must feel so liberating to finally be allowing yourself to be you though?
It's liberating to a degree but I'm still very conscious of the fact that my wife tolerates rather than embraces Clare, so it can never be a totally open thing "
Do you think that will ever change? |
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"This is going to sound awful, but I never expected to get here. My childhood was so shit.
Are you proud that you have got here?
Oh god yes. Maybe not where I am, but it's the journey, not the destination. Sometimes carrying on despite it all is the strongest thing you can do. (God that sounds clichéd)
I smiled reading another thread about mouthy shitty teenagers. It was that rebellious attitude that's helped me survive. "fuck you too, I'll try anyway" is almost in my blood.
That's the thing, it's fight or flight. Face things and deal with them in whatever way you can or just give up. Giving up seems much harder to deal with and has little to no chance of feeling accomplished at the end.
Giving up would have been easier (and yes I'm being grim). But I'm a stubborn shit, and I adore proving people wrong. "
The responses are also fight, flight, freeze, and fawn.
Freeze is "curl up into a ball, shut down, and prepare to die." I've been there. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sometimes I forget I’m a grown up. I see people I went to school with and think, “god you’re a woman”
Life is hard at times when you have to adult though, so I make the most of the carefree times with a childlike excitement.
Lex"
Yeah I still find it weird when kids say "that lady" about me. I still expect to be "that girl" |
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"Sometimes I forget I’m a grown up. I see people I went to school with and think, “god you’re a woman”
Life is hard at times when you have to adult though, so I make the most of the carefree times with a childlike excitement.
Lex
Yeah I still find it weird when kids say "that lady" about me. I still expect to be "that girl" "
A few years ago a woman told her young child to be careful of the lady behind him wheeling a suitcase, don't get in her way. I looked behind me. No ladies with suitcases.
Oh shit. That'd be me then.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"This is going to sound awful, but I never expected to get here. My childhood was so shit.
Are you proud that you have got here?
Oh god yes. Maybe not where I am, but it's the journey, not the destination. Sometimes carrying on despite it all is the strongest thing you can do. (God that sounds clichéd)
I smiled reading another thread about mouthy shitty teenagers. It was that rebellious attitude that's helped me survive. "fuck you too, I'll try anyway" is almost in my blood.
That's the thing, it's fight or flight. Face things and deal with them in whatever way you can or just give up. Giving up seems much harder to deal with and has little to no chance of feeling accomplished at the end.
Giving up would have been easier (and yes I'm being grim). But I'm a stubborn shit, and I adore proving people wrong.
The responses are also fight, flight, freeze, and fawn.
Freeze is "curl up into a ball, shut down, and prepare to die." I've been there. "
You've definitely got fighting spirit about you and there are plenty who will be jealous of that. The best part of being an adult I think is being able to make your own decisions and telling the rest of the world to go fuck itself. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There's a few things I'd have done differently but can't complain"
I looked at your profile and your smile says exactly that. I expected a little shrug as you said it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do miss the long summer holidays with not a care in the world
I miss that so much! Just hanging out with no intent or stress. "
Those were the days - I’m so jealous of my kids |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I do miss the long summer holidays with not a care in the world
I miss that so much! Just hanging out with no intent or stress.
Those were the days - I’m so jealous of my kids "
It's when kids complain of being bored! I turn into my mother! "You don't know how good you've got it!!" |
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"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently? "
No, no, no, yes. I wish I had been more outgoing as a teenager, perhaps then I wouldn't have half the issues that I do now. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently? "
I don't feel like a grown up. Recently I had an annual mortgage statement through and that really knocked me. I had a sort of "fuuuuccck, I'm a proper adult now, no escaping it" moment. Later on that evening I got Id'd when buying a glass of wine so felt a bit better.
I'm not at all where I thought I would be in my life. I assumed for a long time I would end up in academia, a mistress of some arrogant twat of a lecturer but single otherwise. I'm glad things have gone differently for me - really happy about it (I do sometimes feel a bit meh but I'm studying now so it's not too bad). |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
No, no, no, yes. I wish I had been more outgoing as a teenager, perhaps then I wouldn't have half the issues that I do now."
What's stopping you from changing things now? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
I don't feel like a grown up. Recently I had an annual mortgage statement through and that really knocked me. I had a sort of "fuuuuccck, I'm a proper adult now, no escaping it" moment. Later on that evening I got Id'd when buying a glass of wine so felt a bit better.
I'm not at all where I thought I would be in my life. I assumed for a long time I would end up in academia, a mistress of some arrogant twat of a lecturer but single otherwise. I'm glad things have gone differently for me - really happy about it (I do sometimes feel a bit meh but I'm studying now so it's not too bad)."
I get id'd too. My friends are jealous.
I think feeling a bit meh sometimes is a good thing. If things were good all the time then they'd just be normal not good. |
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"This is going to sound awful, but I never expected to get here. My childhood was so shit.
Are you proud that you have got here?
Oh god yes. Maybe not where I am, but it's the journey, not the destination. Sometimes carrying on despite it all is the strongest thing you can do. (God that sounds clichéd)
I smiled reading another thread about mouthy shitty teenagers. It was that rebellious attitude that's helped me survive. "fuck you too, I'll try anyway" is almost in my blood.
That's the thing, it's fight or flight. Face things and deal with them in whatever way you can or just give up. Giving up seems much harder to deal with and has little to no chance of feeling accomplished at the end.
Giving up would have been easier (and yes I'm being grim). But I'm a stubborn shit, and I adore proving people wrong.
The responses are also fight, flight, freeze, and fawn.
Freeze is "curl up into a ball, shut down, and prepare to die." I've been there.
You've definitely got fighting spirit about you and there are plenty who will be jealous of that. The best part of being an adult I think is being able to make your own decisions and telling the rest of the world to go fuck itself. "
It's been earned with blood, sweat and tears. I'd rather not. But it's useful. |
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"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
No, no, no, yes. I wish I had been more outgoing as a teenager, perhaps then I wouldn't have half the issues that I do now.
What's stopping you from changing things now? "
It's not the sort of stuff that comes easily to me, plus it sort of effects my mental health. It was one of the reasons I joined fab in the first place, I've just had mixed results. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
No, no, no, yes. I wish I had been more outgoing as a teenager, perhaps then I wouldn't have half the issues that I do now.
What's stopping you from changing things now?
It's not the sort of stuff that comes easily to me, plus it sort of effects my mental health. It was one of the reasons I joined fab in the first place, I've just had mixed results."
I think most people do, especially men. I'm never sure if joining for specific reasons are a good thing or not. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When I grow up, there will be a day, when everybody has to do what I say
https://youtu.be/-1CE4P8qqPE"
That would've been so much better with your finger pic showing! |
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"
It's liberating to a degree but I'm still very conscious of the fact that my wife tolerates rather than embraces Clare, so it can never be a totally open thing
Do you think that will ever change? "
Doubtful, I get very mixed messages.Shes bought me a dress but won't see me wearing it, given me some clothes which she's bought and never worn because they're not her style.We've been clothes shopping a few times and she's told me she enjoyed it , but then she'll suddenly say that she hates me dressing and it freaks her out |
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"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
No, no, no, yes. I wish I had been more outgoing as a teenager, perhaps then I wouldn't have half the issues that I do now.
What's stopping you from changing things now?
It's not the sort of stuff that comes easily to me, plus it sort of effects my mental health. It was one of the reasons I joined fab in the first place, I've just had mixed results."
If it's not overstepping, it's not too late to seek help. It can be hard and private treatment is easier to access and more reliable (alas), but therapy has meant I used to survive, and now I thrive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not sure I will ever be a grown up.
There are things I sometimes wish I had done differently, or they had resulted in a different outcome. Those things though, if they had different outcomes then who knows if they may have been better or worse. We can only make our choices and live the life we do, we dont get second chances to go back and change anything. But then if we did, if those changes happened none of us would be the people we are.
If any of us are not happy in the now, all we can do is work to change that now, to be where we want to be tomorrow....sometimes I wonder how to make that happen. |
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"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
No, no, no, yes. I wish I had been more outgoing as a teenager, perhaps then I wouldn't have half the issues that I do now.
What's stopping you from changing things now?
It's not the sort of stuff that comes easily to me, plus it sort of effects my mental health. It was one of the reasons I joined fab in the first place, I've just had mixed results.
If it's not overstepping, it's not too late to seek help. It can be hard and private treatment is easier to access and more reliable (alas), but therapy has meant I used to survive, and now I thrive. "
Well I'm already medicated, ideally I need to find a decent councillor which is easier said than done. Cbt wont really help me I don't think but even then I have other situations that don't help. |
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"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
No, no, no, yes. I wish I had been more outgoing as a teenager, perhaps then I wouldn't have half the issues that I do now.
What's stopping you from changing things now?
It's not the sort of stuff that comes easily to me, plus it sort of effects my mental health. It was one of the reasons I joined fab in the first place, I've just had mixed results.
If it's not overstepping, it's not too late to seek help. It can be hard and private treatment is easier to access and more reliable (alas), but therapy has meant I used to survive, and now I thrive.
Well I'm already medicated, ideally I need to find a decent councillor which is easier said than done. Cbt wont really help me I don't think but even then I have other situations that don't help."
CBT didn't suit me either. It took me a very long time to find something/ someone that did.
I wish you peace. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"When I grow up, there will be a day, when everybody has to do what I say
https://youtu.be/-1CE4P8qqPE
That would've been so much better with your finger pic showing! "
You probably never watched my vid  |
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or View forums list | |
"Is being a grown up all you thought it would be? Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
Are you happy with where you've ended up or do you wish you could change it or had done things differently?
No, no, no, yes. I wish I had been more outgoing as a teenager, perhaps then I wouldn't have half the issues that I do now.
What's stopping you from changing things now?
It's not the sort of stuff that comes easily to me, plus it sort of effects my mental health. It was one of the reasons I joined fab in the first place, I've just had mixed results.
If it's not overstepping, it's not too late to seek help. It can be hard and private treatment is easier to access and more reliable (alas), but therapy has meant I used to survive, and now I thrive.
Well I'm already medicated, ideally I need to find a decent councillor which is easier said than done. Cbt wont really help me I don't think but even then I have other situations that don't help.
CBT didn't suit me either. It took me a very long time to find something/ someone that did.
I wish you peace. "
Thank you! Oh and you weren't overstepping before |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
It's liberating to a degree but I'm still very conscious of the fact that my wife tolerates rather than embraces Clare, so it can never be a totally open thing
Do you think that will ever change?
Doubtful, I get very mixed messages.Shes bought me a dress but won't see me wearing it, given me some clothes which she's bought and never worn because they're not her style.We've been clothes shopping a few times and she's told me she enjoyed it , but then she'll suddenly say that she hates me dressing and it freaks her out "
Maybe time will help? I can understand her side too, it's a big change for her. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not sure I will ever be a grown up.
There are things I sometimes wish I had done differently, or they had resulted in a different outcome. Those things though, if they had different outcomes then who knows if they may have been better or worse. We can only make our choices and live the life we do, we dont get second chances to go back and change anything. But then if we did, if those changes happened none of us would be the people we are.
If any of us are not happy in the now, all we can do is work to change that now, to be where we want to be tomorrow....sometimes I wonder how to make that happen."
Absolutely this. There's no guarantees in life, a different path doesn't always lead to a better place. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"When I grow up, there will be a day, when everybody has to do what I say
https://youtu.be/-1CE4P8qqPE
That would've been so much better with your finger pic showing!
You probably never watched my vid "
How else would I have known it was Clawfinger? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"When I grow up, there will be a day, when everybody has to do what I say
https://youtu.be/-1CE4P8qqPE
That would've been so much better with your finger pic showing!
You probably never watched my vid
How else would I have known it was Clawfinger? "
Ooooooh good girl (smiley face) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"When I grow up, there will be a day, when everybody has to do what I say
https://youtu.be/-1CE4P8qqPE
That would've been so much better with your finger pic showing!
You probably never watched my vid
How else would I have known it was Clawfinger?
Ooooooh good girl (smiley face) "
 |
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