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Human vs Animal
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"Hippo "No way, they’re a fecking killing machine! | |||
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"Hippo "Mate... You're fucked! Unless you put Pygmy infront of it. I saw a hippo pick up a lion by the head and lift it clean off the floor in one video.. shocking creatures. Abomination. | |||
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"I reckon I could take on a sloth, just about my speed! I could probably sit on it for a while." 0.1 pts.. but at least you're alive.. unlike the hippo tamer. | |||
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"I couldn't hurt animals so none." What if it was kill or be killed? | |||
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"Is this another alpha thing" No.. but PMF may go UNLOS is he is adamant about this hippo thing. | |||
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"I couldn't hurt animals so none. What if it was kill or be killed?" well that's different so yes Mr khan. | |||
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"I did have to kill a mouse when the cat left it a bit maimed. I tend not to go bigger than fly/wasp but that means God gave me a newspaper. "Wasp beats sloth at least. | |||
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"I reckon we could tag team a shark x"  I dread to think | |||
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"I reckon I could take on a sloth, just about my speed! I could probably sit on it for a while. 0.1 pts.. but at least you're alive.. unlike the hippo tamer." As long as it's not a Slow Loris that licks you to death. | |||
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"I couldn't hurt animals so none. What if it was kill or be killed?well that's different so yes Mr khan." So.. What's the toughest animal you could take on and probably survive? | |||
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"I reckon I could take on a sloth, just about my speed! I could probably sit on it for a while. 0.1 pts.. but at least you're alive.. unlike the hippo tamer. As long as it's not a Slow Loris that licks you to death. " It’s got to catch me first  | |||
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"I couldn’t hurt an animal without cause. As I seem to attract 'well hard, not gay at all (honest...), angry men' who want to fight, it would have to be the hyena. Because, like these angry men, the hyenas known when they see a lion... "A hyena? That's a big call. You know they have a bite stronger than any dog right.. big too. | |||
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"I couldn't hurt animals so none. What if it was kill or be killed?well that's different so yes Mr khan. So.. What's the toughest animal you could take on and probably survive?" A big fat blobby pig. | |||
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"I did have to kill a mouse when the cat left it a bit maimed. I tend not to go bigger than fly/wasp but that means God gave me a newspaper. "That’s the humane thing to do, hard but necessary....  | |||
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"I reckon I could take on a sloth, just about my speed! I could probably sit on it for a while. 0.1 pts.. but at least you're alive.. unlike the hippo tamer. As long as it's not a Slow Loris that licks you to death. It’s got to catch me first "Slow Norris or not.. You HAVE to fight.. is your plan to tire it to sleep? Then beat it up? | |||
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"Hippo
Mate... You're fucked! Unless you put Pygmy infront of it. I saw a hippo pick up a lion by the head and lift it clean off the floor in one video.. shocking creatures. Abomination."I've always wondered about horses lololol | |||
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"I couldn't hurt animals so none. What if it was kill or be killed?well that's different so yes Mr khan. So.. What's the toughest animal you could take on and probably survive?A big fat blobby pig." Really? Big fucking sharp teeth and a tough hide. Hard as nails.. move like a freight train when startled. | |||
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"I reckon I could take on a sloth, just about my speed! I could probably sit on it for a while. 0.1 pts.. but at least you're alive.. unlike the hippo tamer. As long as it's not a Slow Loris that licks you to death. It’s got to catch me first
Slow Norris or not.. You HAVE to fight.. is your plan to tire it to sleep? Then beat it up?"Yup, once I’ve tired it out then I will go in...with massive gloves on and a full body suit so I can’t be licked to death in case it’s taking the piss out of me and still full of beans. | |||
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"I couldn’t hurt an animal without cause. As I seem to attract 'well hard, not gay at all (honest...), angry men' who want to fight, it would have to be the hyena. Because, like these angry men, the hyenas known when they see a lion...
A hyena? That's a big call. You know they have a bite stronger than any dog right.. big too. "Yes, they are a force to be reckoned with. But worth it. They bully in a pack. Bullies have to be disbanded one by one. Go for the biggest one first. | |||
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"I couldn't hurt animals so none. What if it was kill or be killed?well that's different so yes Mr khan. So.. What's the toughest animal you could take on and probably survive?A big fat blobby pig. Really? Big fucking sharp teeth and a tough hide. Hard as nails.. move like a freight train when startled." well you will have to help me won't you | |||
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"I petted an actual tiger once. Full on belly up growlpurry fun. Totally tame bottle fed house reared giant stripey kitty. It folded like an basket of freshly washed laundry. Do I win? "Not unless you slapped it round the face and took the piss put of its stripes. Nope.. no way. | |||
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"Is this another alpha thing" 
Dude drop it puhlease. It's boring as **** and most of the rest of us are aware it was a joke that none of them took seriously. Why u carrying it round in a butthurt bucket? | |||
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"I petted an actual tiger once. Full on belly up growlpurry fun. Totally tame bottle fed house reared giant stripey kitty. It folded like an basket of freshly washed laundry. Do I win?
Not unless you slapped it round the face and took the piss put of its stripes. Nope.. no way."Ummmm, I skritched behind it's ears  | |||
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"How about out boxing a Roo...?" They have sharp claws on their hind legs. When they box.. they're actually kickboxing. Those legs kicking.. with those claws attached? Fuuuuuck that shit.. some guy had his genitals torn to shreds in a kids petting zoo in the 90s. | |||
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"I reckon I could take on a sloth, just about my speed! I could probably sit on it for a while. 0.1 pts.. but at least you're alive.. unlike the hippo tamer. As long as it's not a Slow Loris that licks you to death. It’s got to catch me first
Slow Norris or not.. You HAVE to fight.. is your plan to tire it to sleep? Then beat it up?
Yup, once I’ve tired it out then I will go in...with massive gloves on and a full body suit so I can’t be licked to death in case it’s taking the piss out of me and still full of beans." | |||
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"I couldn’t hurt an animal without cause. As I seem to attract 'well hard, not gay at all (honest...), angry men' who want to fight, it would have to be the hyena. Because, like these angry men, the hyenas known when they see a lion...
A hyena? That's a big call. You know they have a bite stronger than any dog right.. big too.
Yes, they are a force to be reckoned with. But worth it. They bully in a pack. Bullies have to be disbanded one by one. Go for the biggest one first. "I'm not going to set a whole pack on you! I'm impressed. I'd have said wolf.. but I reckon it'd be 50/50 about whether I live or not. | |||
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"I couldn’t hurt an animal without cause. As I seem to attract 'well hard, not gay at all (honest...), angry men' who want to fight, it would have to be the hyena. Because, like these angry men, the hyenas known when they see a lion...
A hyena? That's a big call. You know they have a bite stronger than any dog right.. big too.
Yes, they are a force to be reckoned with. But worth it. They bully in a pack. Bullies have to be disbanded one by one. Go for the biggest one first. "Umm, actually they're matriarchal, highly intelligent, and they only hunt for food not fun, within the pack there's lots of grooming, care and sharing. | |||
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"I couldn’t hurt an animal without cause. As I seem to attract 'well hard, not gay at all (honest...), angry men' who want to fight, it would have to be the hyena. Because, like these angry men, the hyenas known when they see a lion...
A hyena? That's a big call. You know they have a bite stronger than any dog right.. big too.
Yes, they are a force to be reckoned with. But worth it. They bully in a pack. Bullies have to be disbanded one by one. Go for the biggest one first.
Umm, actually they're matriarchal, highly intelligent, and they only hunt for food not fun, within the pack there's lots of grooming, care and sharing."Plus some types of female hyenas have a pseudopenis which is pretty fucking cool. | |||
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"I couldn't hurt animals so none. What if it was kill or be killed?well that's different so yes Mr khan. So.. What's the toughest animal you could take on and probably survive?A big fat blobby pig. Really? Big fucking sharp teeth and a tough hide. Hard as nails.. move like a freight train when startled.well you will have to help me won't you "Fuck that! I'd rather fight a wolf than a huge angry pig! What would you even grab hold of. at least the wolf will bite my arm.. then I can headlock it.. hopefully. Pig would knock you over and either a) gore you to death b) trample you to death.. or c) Trample you then gore you to death. | |||
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"I can't even squish a spider "I can't not squish them.. foul creatures | |||
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"I couldn't hurt animals so none. What if it was kill or be killed?well that's different so yes Mr khan. So.. What's the toughest animal you could take on and probably survive?A big fat blobby pig. Really? Big fucking sharp teeth and a tough hide. Hard as nails.. move like a freight train when startled.well you will have to help me won't you
Fuck that! I'd rather fight a wolf than a huge angry pig! What would you even grab hold of. at least the wolf will bite my arm.. then I can headlock it.. hopefully. Pig would knock you over and either a) gore you to death b) trample you to death.. or c) Trample you then gore you to death."Pigs are so dangerous! Did nobody see Snatch? | |||
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"Mr khan how come you know so much about animals its fascinating x" Sir David Attenborough, Steve Irwin, Steve Bagshawl, BBC, Jaques Cousteau, the really wild show.. books.. | |||
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"I can't even squish a spider
I can't not squish them.. foul creatures"its bad luck to kill spiders. | |||
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"I can't even squish a spider
I can't not squish them.. foul creaturesits bad luck to kill spiders."Especially for the spiders | |||
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"I couldn’t hurt an animal without cause. As I seem to attract 'well hard, not gay at all (honest...), angry men' who want to fight, it would have to be the hyena. Because, like these angry men, the hyenas known when they see a lion...
A hyena? That's a big call. You know they have a bite stronger than any dog right.. big too.
Yes, they are a force to be reckoned with. But worth it. They bully in a pack. Bullies have to be disbanded one by one. Go for the biggest one first.
Umm, actually they're matriarchal, highly intelligent, and they only hunt for food not fun, within the pack there's lots of grooming, care and sharing." | |||
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"I can't even squish a spider
I can't not squish them.. foul creaturesits bad luck to kill spiders.
Especially for the spiders " | |||
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"I couldn't hurt animals so none. What if it was kill or be killed?well that's different so yes Mr khan. So.. What's the toughest animal you could take on and probably survive?A big fat blobby pig. Really? Big fucking sharp teeth and a tough hide. Hard as nails.. move like a freight train when startled.well you will have to help me won't you
Fuck that! I'd rather fight a wolf than a huge angry pig! What would you even grab hold of. at least the wolf will bite my arm.. then I can headlock it.. hopefully. Pig would knock you over and either a) gore you to death b) trample you to death.. or c) Trample you then gore you to death.
Pigs are so dangerous! Did nobody see Snatch?"Hell yeah!! The best way to get rid of a body... | |||
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"A shark. If on dry land." What shark.. You have to kill it before it suffocates or you get less points than the sloth | |||
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"I can't even squish a spider
I can't not squish them.. foul creaturesits bad luck to kill spiders."give a fuuuuuuuuuuuck | |||
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"How about out boxing a Roo...? They have sharp claws on their hind legs. When they box.. they're actually kickboxing. Those legs kicking.. with those claws attached? Fuuuuuck that shit.. some guy had his genitals torn to shreds in a kids petting zoo in the 90s." Very true my cousin got knocked out by one he was trying to help..! | |||
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"I can't even squish a spider
I can't not squish them.. foul creaturesits bad luck to kill spiders.
give a fuuuuuuuuuuuck"The language | |||
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"Hippo "With a well dug trap that wood be easy to do. Ps you can dig holes with hands. | |||
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"How about out boxing a Roo...? They have sharp claws on their hind legs. When they box.. they're actually kickboxing. Those legs kicking.. with those claws attached? Fuuuuuck that shit.. some guy had his genitals torn to shreds in a kids petting zoo in the 90s. Very true my cousin got knocked out by one he was trying to help..!"They are all leg! Sod getting kicked by that without claws. How long was he out cold? | |||
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"A shark. If on dry land. What shark.. You have to kill it before it suffocates or you get less points than the sloth " I’ll take less points than the sloth... I’m out | |||
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"How about out boxing a Roo...? They have sharp claws on their hind legs. When they box.. they're actually kickboxing. Those legs kicking.. with those claws attached? Fuuuuuck that shit.. some guy had his genitals torn to shreds in a kids petting zoo in the 90s. Very true my cousin got knocked out by one he was trying to help..!
They are all leg! Sod getting kicked by that without claws. How long was he out cold?"Not long, a few minutes... took his partner a while to stop laughing and realise the seriousness of the situation | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? " What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit | |||
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"How about out boxing a Roo...? They have sharp claws on their hind legs. When they box.. they're actually kickboxing. Those legs kicking.. with those claws attached? Fuuuuuck that shit.. some guy had his genitals torn to shreds in a kids petting zoo in the 90s. Very true my cousin got knocked out by one he was trying to help..!
They are all leg! Sod getting kicked by that without claws. How long was he out cold?
Not long, a few minutes... took his partner a while to stop laughing and realise the seriousness of the situation "I bet | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit " Try now.. hazard a guess. | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit " I think it’s fantastic! Ive been sat here thinking through different scenarios with me fighting various animals I keep getting beat though
D. | |||
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"I reckon I could put the box on a kangaroo. Double jab, left hook.. Game over "kangaroo's are rough you would loose. | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
Try now.. hazard a guess. "Ok , a purple skunk | |||
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"I used to play fight with a full grown bull, (bovine not fab definition) but he used to end it by rolling over to have his belly tickled, so probably doesn't count... So fight for real survival I think it has to be a goose... they play hard but I reckon I can take it..." Geese are used as guards for a reason. | |||
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"I reckon I could put the box on a kangaroo. Double jab, left hook.. Game over "Rather you than me. | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
I think it’s fantastic! Ive been sat here thinking through different scenarios with me fighting various animals I keep getting beat though
D."Humans are pretty pathetic creatures without their packs. | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
Try now.. hazard a guess.
Ok , a purple skunk "You win on style. | |||
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"I used to play fight with a full grown bull, (bovine not fab definition) but he used to end it by rolling over to have his belly tickled, so probably doesn't count... So fight for real survival I think it has to be a goose... they play hard but I reckon I can take it... Geese are used as guards for a reason. "Noisy as fuck mainly. But yeah.. they will go for you | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
I think it’s fantastic! Ive been sat here thinking through different scenarios with me fighting various animals I keep getting beat though
D.
Humans are pretty pathetic creatures without their packs."Well our most powerful tool is our brain and I can’t help but use that in each scenario and it usually involves using more than just fists
D. | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
I think it’s fantastic! Ive been sat here thinking through different scenarios with me fighting various animals I keep getting beat though
D." I’ve just googled...how to kill a Komodo Dragon.
I tell you now that bugger ain’t being taken out that’s for sure... | |||
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"Hippo
Mate... You're fucked! Unless you put Pygmy infront of it. I saw a hippo pick up a lion by the head and lift it clean off the floor in one video.. shocking creatures. Abomination."speed kills im like a cobra | |||
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"Hippo
No way, they’re a fecking killing machine!"iv been killing machines since i was 6 ask my mummy how many atari pads bounced off the wall | |||
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"Is this another alpha thing No.. but PMF may go UNLOS is he is adamant about this hippo thing." tempted just for the laugh lol | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
I think it’s fantastic! Ive been sat here thinking through different scenarios with me fighting various animals I keep getting beat though
D.
Humans are pretty pathetic creatures without their packs.
Well our most powerful tool is our brain and I can’t help but use that in each scenario and it usually involves using more than just fists
D."no sticks.. no stones.. no tools.. no weapons.. There aren't many creatures we could fight and survive a mutual fight to the death with. | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
I think it’s fantastic! Ive been sat here thinking through different scenarios with me fighting various animals I keep getting beat though
D.
Humans are pretty pathetic creatures without their packs.
Well our most powerful tool is our brain and I can’t help but use that in each scenario and it usually involves using more than just fists
D.
no sticks.. no stones.. no tools.. no weapons.. There aren't many creatures we could fight and survive a mutual fight to the death with.
"hippos ffs d hippos man | |||
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"By definition we're critters ourselves - so I'm going for a human that was intent on harming an animal for sport "That's cold man. This isn't for sport.. this is life and death.. no betting allowed. A human? You may get an MMA Fighter | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
I think it’s fantastic! Ive been sat here thinking through different scenarios with me fighting various animals I keep getting beat though
D.
I’ve just googled...how to kill a Komodo Dragon.
I tell you now that bugger ain’t being taken out that’s for sure... "Yep, I just checked too fantastic creatures
D. | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
I think it’s fantastic! Ive been sat here thinking through different scenarios with me fighting various animals I keep getting beat though
D.
I’ve just googled...how to kill a Komodo Dragon.
I tell you now that bugger ain’t being taken out that’s for sure... "Lmfao! yeah.. I'd be mega impressed if you could find a way. | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
I think it’s fantastic! Ive been sat here thinking through different scenarios with me fighting various animals I keep getting beat though
D.
Humans are pretty pathetic creatures without their packs.
Well our most powerful tool is our brain and I can’t help but use that in each scenario and it usually involves using more than just fists
D.
no sticks.. no stones.. no tools.. no weapons.. There aren't many creatures we could fight and survive a mutual fight to the death with.
hippos ffs d hippos man"A Hippo!! Even the best predators don’t mess with them!!
D. | |||
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"Hippo
Mate... You're fucked! Unless you put Pygmy infront of it. I saw a hippo pick up a lion by the head and lift it clean off the floor in one video.. shocking creatures. Abomination.speed kills im like a cobra "Lots of super fast slaps to the face? It may decide to keep you as a fly swatter | |||
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"I'd have a crack at a Sabre Tooth Tiger, on the basis of it already being extinct." INGEN just came up with this great new invention.. | |||
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"Id take on any animal as i could cuddle them to death" What is the toughest one you could smother without being mauled to death? | |||
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"By definition we're critters ourselves - so I'm going for a human that was intent on harming an animal for sport
That's cold man. This isn't for sport.. this is life and death.. no betting allowed.
A human? You may get an MMA Fighter "I meant an actual human that wanted to kill an animal for sport (like those American rich twats that pay to hunt lions) - not a forumite who is killing imaginary animals | |||
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"Chimpanzee. Namely Caesar. " Really? You'd fight a Chimpanzee? Caesar could pull your arms from their sockets! | |||
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"Chimpanzee. Namely Caesar. Really? You'd fight a Chimpanzee? Caesar could pull your arms from their sockets!" and rip your face off. | |||
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"By definition we're critters ourselves - so I'm going for a human that was intent on harming an animal for sport
That's cold man. This isn't for sport.. this is life and death.. no betting allowed.
A human? You may get an MMA Fighter
I meant an actual human that wanted to kill an animal for sport (like those American rich twats that pay to hunt lions) - not a forumite who is killing imaginary animals "Ok.. I'll put you against an unarmed human hunter of equal build. Intense.. One step beyond. I always thought of you as an Alpha G-man..  | |||
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"Hippo
Mate... You're fucked! Unless you put Pygmy infront of it. I saw a hippo pick up a lion by the head and lift it clean off the floor in one video.. shocking creatures. Abomination.speed kills im like a cobra
Lots of super fast slaps to the face? It may decide to keep you as a fly swatter "dodge the bite run behind on its back and thumb to the eye repeatedly until i pop the eye then push in my figers and crush its brain in my fist or dive in its mouth and kill it from the inside like drax the destroyer | |||
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"Id take on any animal as i could cuddle them to death What is the toughest one you could smother without being mauled to death?" id take on a tame lion or tiger but not a wild one. Id take anything thats domesticated | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? What goes on in your head op ? Seriously , in 57 years I’ve never thought about what animal I could lay the smack down on ! I guess I must be a bit green , somewhat akin to what may be on your menu to come up with this shit
I think it’s fantastic! Ive been sat here thinking through different scenarios with me fighting various animals I keep getting beat though
D.
Humans are pretty pathetic creatures without their packs.
Well our most powerful tool is our brain and I can’t help but use that in each scenario and it usually involves using more than just fists
D.
no sticks.. no stones.. no tools.. no weapons.. There aren't many creatures we could fight and survive a mutual fight to the death with.
hippos ffs d hippos man
A Hippo!! Even the best predators don’t mess with them!!
D."lesser creatures dude | |||
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"Hippo
Mate... You're fucked! Unless you put Pygmy infront of it. I saw a hippo pick up a lion by the head and lift it clean off the floor in one video.. shocking creatures. Abomination.speed kills im like a cobra
Lots of super fast slaps to the face? It may decide to keep you as a fly swatter dodge the bite run behind on its back and thumb to the eye repeatedly until i pop the eye then push in my figers and crush its brain in my fist or dive in its mouth and kill it from the inside like drax the destroyer "Dodge the mouth? It's the width of a car! I so want to see a CGI model of the different ways this would go horribly wrong | |||
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"Id take on any animal as i could cuddle them to death What is the toughest one you could smother without being mauled to death?id take on a tame lion or tiger but not a wild one. Id take anything thats domesticated" In a fight to the death. The animal isn't playing by your rules you know? | |||
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"Hippo
Mate... You're fucked! Unless you put Pygmy infront of it. I saw a hippo pick up a lion by the head and lift it clean off the floor in one video.. shocking creatures. Abomination.speed kills im like a cobra
Lots of super fast slaps to the face? It may decide to keep you as a fly swatter dodge the bite run behind on its back and thumb to the eye repeatedly until i pop the eye then push in my figers and crush its brain in my fist or dive in its mouth and kill it from the inside like drax the destroyer " love it!
D. | |||
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"Rattlesnake." Seriously? There's no antivenom.. same goes for anyone who takes on a venomous creature. | |||
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"Hippo
Mate... You're fucked! Unless you put Pygmy infront of it. I saw a hippo pick up a lion by the head and lift it clean off the floor in one video.. shocking creatures. Abomination.speed kills im like a cobra
Lots of super fast slaps to the face? It may decide to keep you as a fly swatter dodge the bite run behind on its back and thumb to the eye repeatedly until i pop the eye then push in my figers and crush its brain in my fist or dive in its mouth and kill it from the inside like drax the destroyer
Dodge the mouth? It's the width of a car! I so want to see a CGI model of the different ways this would go horribly wrong "i played football on the m1 i can handle hippo dodging | |||
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"Rattlesnake. Seriously? There's no antivenom.. same goes for anyone who takes on a venomous creature. " It is risky for sure but possible. | |||
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"Mongoose... I think I'd have a fighting chance, if I could grab its tail! " I think you'd be better kicking it. I'm pretty sure if you grabbed it's tail it'd climb up your arm biting every inch of skin on the way up. One good kick and it's a goner. | |||
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"Rattlesnake. Seriously? There's no antivenom.. same goes for anyone who takes on a venomous creature. It is risky for sure but possible." I'm not comfortable enough with snakes to take that risk. I had a python, but the one time he went to bite me.. he got me. Chopper, the nasty bastard Burmese Python. | |||
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"I reckon I could put the box on a kangaroo. Double jab, left hook.. Game over kangaroo's are rough you would loose."Not if I do some ninja moves and judo chop | |||
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"Angry dog" Nope.. You're on Hippo.. it's done now. I've arranged it. | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? " Non same as human If I could win I would not fight it would be wrong to take advantage If I could not it would be foolish to fight I dont fight , it is never a solution | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? Non same as human If I could win I would not fight it would be wrong to take advantage If I could not it would be foolish to fight I dont fight , it is never a solution " Well you are dead then. Whole point of the thread is a human vs animal fight to the death. | |||
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"Its got to be a horse. But a gelding only, they are a bit dumber bless them. A few subtle bòdy language moves gets them all confused and they think you are amazing and giant and in charge and they will bow to your every command without a finger raised in anger. In general "No. You can't tame the animals in this thread.. I've whispered in their ears and given them a shot of adrenaline. The gelding will be coming at you all hooves blazing.. Are you sure you want a horse? I'd run a fucking mile. | |||
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"Its got to be a horse. But a gelding only, they are a bit dumber bless them. A few subtle bòdy language moves gets them all confused and they think you are amazing and giant and in charge and they will bow to your every command without a finger raised in anger. In general
No. You can't tame the animals in this thread.. I've whispered in their ears and given them a shot of adrenaline. The gelding will be coming at you all hooves blazing.. Are you sure you want a horse? I'd run a fucking mile. "How about a little on then. I can leapfrog over it when it charges at me. | |||
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"Its got to be a horse. But a gelding only, they are a bit dumber bless them. A few subtle bòdy language moves gets them all confused and they think you are amazing and giant and in charge and they will bow to your every command without a finger raised in anger. In general
No. You can't tame the animals in this thread.. I've whispered in their ears and given them a shot of adrenaline. The gelding will be coming at you all hooves blazing.. Are you sure you want a horse? I'd run a fucking mile.
How about a little on then. I can leapfrog over it when it charges at me. "I reckon you could knock out a Shetland Pony | |||
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"I could probably take a Guinea pig." Veering dangerously into sloth territory there? How about a Capybaru? World's biggest guinea pig. | |||
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"Angry dog Nope.. You're on Hippo.. it's done now. I've arranged it." He could take on the angry dog after the hippo, if he is not a pile of hippo dung | |||
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"Its got to be a horse. But a gelding only, they are a bit dumber bless them. A few subtle bòdy language moves gets them all confused and they think you are amazing and giant and in charge and they will bow to your every command without a finger raised in anger. In general
No. You can't tame the animals in this thread.. I've whispered in their ears and given them a shot of adrenaline. The gelding will be coming at you all hooves blazing.. Are you sure you want a horse? I'd run a fucking mile.
How about a little on then. I can leapfrog over it when it charges at me.
I reckon you could knock out a Shetland Pony "They're crafty buggers and go for the low blow  | |||
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"Angry dog Nope.. You're on Hippo.. it's done now. I've arranged it." il take both need a challenge | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? " . Humans are animals, do you mean which size animal could you biff in a fight?. | |||
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"I could probably take a Guinea pig. Veering dangerously into sloth territory there? How about a Capybaru? World's biggest guinea pig." Sure, why not? | |||
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"Angry dog Nope.. You're on Hippo.. it's done now. I've arranged it. He could take on the angry dog after the hippo, if he is not a pile of hippo dung "A hippo wouldn't eat him.. it'd just trample and bite him in half. Only way dung is coming into it, is if it helicopter spread scents after the deed is done. | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? . Humans are animals, do you mean which size animal could you biff in a fight?." No.. what is the toughest/most dangerous animal you could take on and win against? | |||
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"My Ex "You're fucked | |||
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"My Ex
You're fucked "Yeah actually , she'd beat the fuck outta me | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? Non same as human If I could win I would not fight it would be wrong to take advantage If I could not it would be foolish to fight I dont fight , it is never a solution Well you are dead then. Whole point of the thread is a human vs animal fight to the death." I know , then a shark it will be x | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? Non same as human If I could win I would not fight it would be wrong to take advantage If I could not it would be foolish to fight I dont fight , it is never a solution Well you are dead then. Whole point of the thread is a human vs animal fight to the death. I know , then a shark it will be x" A shark.. Not a bad choice. There teeth are so sharp you probably wouldn't feel the pain. I'd be so scared though.. I think a lion or bear would be worse. | |||
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"Thinking back to years ago, a feral cat from the factory behind us was terrorising the family cat and dog. The dog had a fight with it and came worse off. It used to stalk the garden and around the house, really scary, it finally went away after a while but I might have had to take the fierce twat on and probably have come worse off like the dog. " Cats are psycho ninjas.. don't fuck with cats. I don't understand people who choose to take some of the smaller big cats into their homes. That's like inviting Hannibal Lector to come stay. | |||
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"I could probably take a Guinea pig. Veering dangerously into sloth territory there? How about a Capybaru? World's biggest guinea pig. Sure, why not?" RUS's? | |||
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"I had to protect two stupid women and four young children from a pig once at a cattle market when they walked through a gate that clearly said staff and buyers only. I'm a 20st guy had to have my back to it to get them out and took a severe battering. I've never been so black and blue in my life. That was a sow too, not a boar. I also used to help with rescue dogs, I had one put 3 holes in my forearm and turn it black, half an hour later she was sitting on my knee giving me kisses and cuddles. I'd never really want to fight any animal though so wouldn't want to speculate what I could kill or what would kill me but I've no intention on getting into shark infested waters. "Pigs = Thug life | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? . Humans are animals, do you mean which size animal could you biff in a fight?. No.. what is the toughest/most dangerous animal you could take on and win against?" . You , nah just kidding I'll go for something tough instead like say a hedgehog | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? . Humans are animals, do you mean which size animal could you biff in a fight?. No.. what is the toughest/most dangerous animal you could take on and win against?. You , nah just kidding I'll go for something tough instead like say a hedgehog "You're welcome to try.. I'm a bit like a honey badger though.. Small, angry and don't give a fuck | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? . Humans are animals, do you mean which size animal could you biff in a fight?. No.. what is the toughest/most dangerous animal you could take on and win against?. You , nah just kidding I'll go for something tough instead like say a hedgehog
You're welcome to try.. I'm a bit like a honey badger though.. Small, angry and don't give a fuck ". I can tell from the beard | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? . Humans are animals, do you mean which size animal could you biff in a fight?. No.. what is the toughest/most dangerous animal you could take on and win against?. You , nah just kidding I'll go for something tough instead like say a hedgehog
You're welcome to try.. I'm a bit like a honey badger though.. Small, angry and don't give a fuck .
I can tell from the beard "black and white patches | |||
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"Thinking back to years ago, a feral cat from the factory behind us was terrorising the family cat and dog. The dog had a fight with it and came worse off. It used to stalk the garden and around the house, really scary, it finally went away after a while but I might have had to take the fierce twat on and probably have come worse off like the dog. Cats are psycho ninjas.. don't fuck with cats. I don't understand people who choose to take some of the smaller big cats into their homes. That's like inviting Hannibal Lector to come stay." It is. I was walking home one night and got to across the road from my house and it was just standing there outside,staring at me. I actually waited until it had gone before I crossed over | |||
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"Id take on any animal as i could cuddle them to death What is the toughest one you could smother without being mauled to death?id take on a tame lion or tiger but not a wild one. Id take anything thats domesticated In a fight to the death. The animal isn't playing by your rules you know? " but i shall be cuddling them so much they will fall in love with me and love conquers all | |||
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"Hippo "Plenty of Hippos on here | |||
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"Mongoose... I think I'd have a fighting chance, if I could grab its tail! I think you'd be better kicking it. I'm pretty sure if you grabbed it's tail it'd climb up your arm biting every inch of skin on the way up. One good kick and it's a goner." Ninja kick it is then! I just seen a video of one fighting a lion
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"I fukkin hate swans I would feel satisfied with a fight with a swan" Watch out for your arms DC I reckon swans are all hiss.. One smack to that beautiful face and it's neck'd go all wobbly. | |||
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"Mongoose... I think I'd have a fighting chance, if I could grab its tail! I think you'd be better kicking it. I'm pretty sure if you grabbed it's tail it'd climb up your arm biting every inch of skin on the way up. One good kick and it's a goner. Ninja kick it is then! I just seen a video of one fighting a lion
"A Mongoose? Honey Badgers are in same family as Mongoose. They regularly brush up against lions. | |||
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"Hippo
Plenty of Hippos on here "whats that mean? | |||
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"Mongoose... I think I'd have a fighting chance, if I could grab its tail! I think you'd be better kicking it. I'm pretty sure if you grabbed it's tail it'd climb up your arm biting every inch of skin on the way up. One good kick and it's a goner. Ninja kick it is then! I just seen a video of one fighting a lion
A Mongoose? Honey Badgers are in same family as Mongoose. They regularly brush up against lions."Honey Badgers are f'in psycho and to be avoided at all cost ! Most insane proposed so far has to be man vs hippo | |||
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"No weapons.. Just what God gave you. Bonus points for going big. What critter could you lay the smack down on if push came to shove? Non same as human If I could win I would not fight it would be wrong to take advantage If I could not it would be foolish to fight I dont fight , it is never a solution Well you are dead then. Whole point of the thread is a human vs animal fight to the death. I know , then a shark it will be x A shark.. Not a bad choice. There teeth are so sharp you probably wouldn't feel the pain. I'd be so scared though.. I think a lion or bear would be worse." No I'd kill the shark , Bob it on the nose and invert it x | |||
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"Hippo
Plenty of Hippos on here whats that mean?"I can guess, but didn't think it deserved a response. | |||
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"Hippo
Plenty of Hippos on here whats that mean?"As it says on the tin... | |||
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Not even got a clue as to how many dogs wanted to have a go at me at the rescue, only got had by that one but had blood spilt a few times separating two or more of them having a spat.
Most dangerous are people though, we can be arseholes and use things as weapons, been hit by a ceramic ash tray and someone tried to hit me with a pint glass, never had an animal try that. Thinking about it I did get hit with a glass once, fortunately only got me across my hand but still have the scar almost 30 years later. | |||
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"Hippo
Plenty of Hippos on here whats that mean?
I can guess, but didn't think it deserved a response."Indeed. | |||
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"With out modern weapons. There's not many of the bigger animals a human can kill . So it would have to be something easy to catch . And if you don't count cats or dogs. Chickens or any small flightless bird. Mostly you would need something to catch or club it 1st. " Any animal.. I'm giving you REPUTATION points for the toughest one you're prepared to take on.. hand to hand.. modern weapons? You're not allowed a knife or a stick or a club. You can choose a dog to kick fuck out of if you like. I'm nice.. I don't want any humans to die, only animals. So I'm giving people the chance to back out if i spot a flaw in the plan. *No animals were harmed in this thread* | |||
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"A gnat" One point above a sloth Witchdoctor.. you can do way better.. If YOUR life depended on it. Which animal do you reckon you could just about take down and gets rep points for? I think you could knock a deer out. Just watch out for the antlers. | |||
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"A gnat One point above a sloth Witchdoctor.. you can do way better.. If YOUR life depended on it. Which animal do you reckon you could just about take down and gets rep points for? I think you could knock a deer out. Just watch out for the antlers." Hang on.. how would you kill a deer without a knife? It's throat and neck muscles are probably so strong you couldn't stop it breathing. You'll have to punch it's skull in mate.. dont pick a deer. | |||
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"A gnat One point above a sloth Witchdoctor.. you can do way better.. If YOUR life depended on it. Which animal do you reckon you could just about take down and gets rep points for? I think you could knock a deer out. Just watch out for the antlers." I'd take on a T-Rex (they are extinct are't they ). | |||
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"I actually can't believe just how many animals have had a go at me lol... I had a goose try to attack me once, being the gentleman I am I just sidefooted it away instead of wringing it's fecking neck. Had a Bull face up to me, gawd was I pleased it had a nose ring.... Best ever though was a goat trying to eat the bottom of the leg of my jeans, that was cute as hell
Not even got a clue as to how many dogs wanted to have a go at me at the rescue, only got had by that one but had blood spilt a few times separating two or more of them having a spat.
Most dangerous are people though, we can be arseholes and use things as weapons, been hit by a ceramic ash tray and someone tried to hit me with a pint glass, never had an animal try that. Thinking about it I did get hit with a glass once, fortunately only got me across my hand but still have the scar almost 30 years later."Humans are monsters. Which is why I find Silence of the Lambs pant shittingly scary and most horror films a pile of shit. | |||
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"A gnat One point above a sloth Witchdoctor.. you can do way better.. If YOUR life depended on it. Which animal do you reckon you could just about take down and gets rep points for? I think you could knock a deer out. Just watch out for the antlers. I'd take on a T-Rex (they are extinct are't they )."At least the sloth was alive.. Zero respect points given for flogging a 350,000,000yr old skellybones. | |||
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"Ok, that's harsh so.... I once ch0ked out a 59kg Rottweiler with a 22-23" neck to get him off a black Lab but caused no real harm. Does that count? The dopey bitch that is now an ex-friend and supposed dog trainer that was meant to be watching and supervising them was hitting him in the head with a brick..." It's very Impressive and proof some of us aren't talking crap when we say we think we could take on a Wolf or big dog. But is that your animal of choice? Going with a tried and tested method? Or do fancy trying and testing it on something else? More RE-spect! | |||
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"Hippo
Plenty of Hippos on here whats that mean?
I can guess, but didn't think it deserved a response.
Indeed. "answer pls ? | |||
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"Ok, that's harsh so.... I once ch0ked out a 59kg Rottweiler with a 22-23" neck to get him off a black Lab but caused no real harm. Does that count? The dopey bitch that is now an ex-friend and supposed dog trainer that was meant to be watching and supervising them was hitting him in the head with a brick... It's very Impressive and proof some of us aren't talking crap when we say we think we could take on a Wolf or big dog. But is that your animal of choice? Going with a tried and tested method? Or do fancy trying and testing it on something else? More RE-spect!" I actually did it for his welfare and survival, he now lives with us btw and is the politest and most respectful dog ever. He had 3 or 4 homes before us as he had male dog aggression, took some time and work but he is now a great lad. I honestly don't know what I would take on as it is all in the moment and you just have to face what you are presented with, if I survive I can share a story if not then, erm, I'm dead lol. | |||
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"Anaconda!" Fucking Hell. What's your plan? For your info.. it's only fair to make the battle arena a mix of human/Animal environment. There will be water in there with you in some bit and we're talking healthy, adult Anaconda here. | |||
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