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How to make respectful men
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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How can society raise men to be respectful? If the boys have disrespectful, abusive fathers that they idolise, who will teach them to be respectful?
If their fathers taught them that women are lesser beings who should only speak when spoken to, and they have no decent male role models, then what? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How can society raise men to be respectful? If the boys have disrespectful, abusive fathers that they idolise, who will teach them to be respectful?
If their fathers taught them that women are lesser beings who should only speak when spoken to, and they have no decent male role models, then what?"
Hmmmm, how many people are raised in a household like that across the country though? And what do you mean by respectful? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not directly a mans/father's job to teach to respect women.
I was raised by my mother (and grandmother), I have huge respect for women in more ways than one. |
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By *ogNMuseCouple
over a year ago
Surrey |
Playing devils advocate - What about Mothers that let their sons get away with misbehaving, seen plenty of examples when picking kids up from school of gobby fishwives thinking their darling little sons are complete angels.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Playing devils advocate - What about Mothers that let their sons get away with misbehaving, seen plenty of examples when picking kids up from school of gobby fishwives thinking their darling little sons are complete angels.
"
I think we need to create new mothers, maybe ginetic modification? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Playing devils advocate - What about Mothers that let their sons get away with misbehaving, seen plenty of examples when picking kids up from school of gobby fishwives thinking their darling little sons are complete angels.
"
Good point.  |
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By *yrdsisWoman
over a year ago
Gleam Street |
My cousin has a father who is vile to say the least... he adores his Dad.. as he should, but we also have amazing female influences in his life who have counteracted that role model.... not quite sure where Im going here, but my cousin is now married with two little girls and can see himself where his Dad is wrong |
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"We are not all bad you know lol
Majority of guys are decent blokes
I didn't say all men are bad. 
The OP is about a specific group. "
But what group ... it isn't clear when the very first question is
"How can society make men respectful?" ... that seems to point at all men ... which as many have said here is unfair when so many men are respectful
It's the sad case of the bad eggs spoiling the whole clutch |
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"How can society raise men to be respectful? If the boys have disrespectful, abusive fathers that they idolise, who will teach them to be respectful?
If their fathers taught them that women are lesser beings who should only speak when spoken to, and they have no decent male role models, then what?"
Sadly that is how my children were raised.
They also saw me, eventually, stand up for myself, for them.
They learnt you don't treat women, of any person that way.
My children will never be the kind of man my ex is.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My cousin has a father who is vile to say the least... he adores his Dad.. as he should, but we also have amazing female influences in his life who have counteracted that role model.... not quite sure where Im going here, but my cousin is now married with two little girls and can see himself where his Dad is wrong"
That's promising.
Perhaps having daughters rather than sons made a difference. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"How can society raise men to be respectful? If the boys have disrespectful, abusive fathers that they idolise, who will teach them to be respectful?
If their fathers taught them that women are lesser beings who should only speak when spoken to, and they have no decent male role models, then what?
Sadly that is how my children were raised.
They also saw me, eventually, stand up for myself, for them.
They learnt you don't treat women, of any person that way.
My children will never be the kind of man my ex is.
"
 |
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All things being equal you are quite right that when raising children they need role models to look up to ... both boys and girls ..
Children nowadays .. again I am generalizing here as so many children are brought up fine ... there does seem to be a trend towards a lack of respect to society and authority from our younger generations, partly because they are not taught consequences to actions .. or consequences are easy to tolerate
Yes .. boys with misogynistic fathers tend to follow suit
However, there are girls who are as bad .. reach 16 and get themselves knocked up just so they can get a council flat as an example
The key point as was made at the start ... good role models should create balanced children
Now how we do that .. tricky
The only way is Essex ... pure other reality TV ... let's try that ... perhaps not
How about those pillars of society that are our politicians, voted in to represent our views ... oh dear .. that doesn't work either
Perhaps we are doomed as a society
Perhaps not ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Imahine a title with
'How to make women respectful'
Sounds jarring, sexist. Generalising about a sex in a negative light?
Sexism definitely goes both ways. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"All things being equal you are quite right that when raising children they need role models to look up to ... both boys and girls ..
Children nowadays .. again I am generalizing here as so many children are brought up fine ... there does seem to be a trend towards a lack of respect to society and authority from our younger generations, partly because they are not taught consequences to actions .. or consequences are easy to tolerate
Yes .. boys with misogynistic fathers tend to follow suit
However, there are girls who are as bad .. reach 16 and get themselves knocked up just so they can get a council flat as an example
The key point as was made at the start ... good role models should create balanced children
Now how we do that .. tricky
The only way is Essex ... pure other reality TV ... let's try that ... perhaps not
How about those pillars of society that are our politicians, voted in to represent our views ... oh dear .. that doesn't work either
Perhaps we are doomed as a society
Perhaps not ..."
Apologies. My first paragraph should have been one whole sentence rather than 2, as that would have better reflected the question I was thinking of.
Good role models I agree would help. Also agree about politicians perhaps not being ideal role models. 
'Society' - I was meaning/ wondering if role models external to family could work. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My oldest is a disrespectful shit with or without my help i think most its down to who they spend most time with i blame his mates"
Teenage hormones?
It's not always the parents' fault, good point. Friends have an effect. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How can society raise men to be respectful? If the boys have disrespectful, abusive fathers that they idolise, who will teach them to be respectful?
If their fathers taught them that women are lesser beings who should only speak when spoken to, and they have no decent male role models, then what?"
So it mans fault again, and not the hatred bitter women, who kick out or abandoned the fathers after the child is born a poison her child against their own fathers and men to live a life on benefits instead of making a relationship work with the so-called man she loved apparently.
All the bad men in the world have mothers too. |
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"All things being equal you are quite right that when raising children they need role models to look up to ... both boys and girls ..
Children nowadays .. again I am generalizing here as so many children are brought up fine ... there does seem to be a trend towards a lack of respect to society and authority from our younger generations, partly because they are not taught consequences to actions .. or consequences are easy to tolerate
Yes .. boys with misogynistic fathers tend to follow suit
However, there are girls who are as bad .. reach 16 and get themselves knocked up just so they can get a council flat as an example
The key point as was made at the start ... good role models should create balanced children
Now how we do that .. tricky
The only way is Essex ... pure other reality TV ... let's try that ... perhaps not
How about those pillars of society that are our politicians, voted in to represent our views ... oh dear .. that doesn't work either
Perhaps we are doomed as a society
Perhaps not ...
Apologies. My first paragraph should have been one whole sentence rather than 2, as that would have better reflected the question I was thinking of.
Good role models I agree would help. Also agree about politicians perhaps not being ideal role models.
'Society' - I was meaning/ wondering if role models external to family could work. "
No apology needed, I was merely playing devil's advocate slightly. You are right the whole first paragraph would make the point I suspected you were meaning
Role models, absolutely, why should they just come from within the family?
There are plenty of good eggs out there that should hide the bad ones from sight |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My oldest is a disrespectful shit with or without my help i think most its down to who they spend most time with i blame his mates
Teenage hormones?
It's not always the parents' fault, good point. Friends have an effect."
Parents who say it not always the parants fault should not be having kids. |
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"How can society raise men to be respectful? If the boys have disrespectful, abusive fathers that they idolise, who will teach them to be respectful?
If their fathers taught them that women are lesser beings who should only speak when spoken to, and they have no decent male role models, then what?"
we as father and mother are a mirror to how kid when they are young. Show the boy at 7years and I will show you the man at 18 years old. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My oldest is a disrespectful shit with or without my help i think most its down to who they spend most time with i blame his mates
Teenage hormones?
It's not always the parents' fault, good point. Friends have an effect.
Parents who say it not always the parants fault should not be having kids."
funny that id say 1 shit out of 3 is ok going its down to all influences of there life unless u keep them in a cage id much rather have kids that are as world wise as they are book smart if that comes at the expense of respect then il live with it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't know, maybe the first step is to not make it sound like you're teaching a pet not to knock over the vase?
Nobody 'taught me to respect women' just as nobody taught me to respect men. I was just taught to be nice to people.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't know, maybe the first step is to not make it sound like you're teaching a pet not to knock over the vase?
Nobody 'taught me to respect women' just as nobody taught me to respect men. I was just taught to be nice to people.
"
What do you mean about the vase? Teach by example, not just telling off? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't know, maybe the first step is to not make it sound like you're teaching a pet not to knock over the vase?
Nobody 'taught me to respect women' just as nobody taught me to respect men. I was just taught to be nice to people.
"
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"All things being equal you are quite right that when raising children they need role models to look up to ... both boys and girls ..
Children nowadays .. again I am generalizing here as so many children are brought up fine ... there does seem to be a trend towards a lack of respect to society and authority from our younger generations, partly because they are not taught consequences to actions .. or consequences are easy to tolerate
Yes .. boys with misogynistic fathers tend to follow suit
However, there are girls who are as bad .. reach 16 and get themselves knocked up just so they can get a council flat as an example
The key point as was made at the start ... good role models should create balanced children
Now how we do that .. tricky
The only way is Essex ... pure other reality TV ... let's try that ... perhaps not
How about those pillars of society that are our politicians, voted in to represent our views ... oh dear .. that doesn't work either
Perhaps we are doomed as a society
Perhaps not ...
Apologies. My first paragraph should have been one whole sentence rather than 2, as that would have better reflected the question I was thinking of.
Good role models I agree would help. Also agree about politicians perhaps not being ideal role models.
'Society' - I was meaning/ wondering if role models external to family could work.
No apology needed, I was merely playing devil's advocate slightly. You are right the whole first paragraph would make the point I suspected you were meaning
Role models, absolutely, why should they just come from within the family?
There are plenty of good eggs out there that should hide the bad ones from sight"
There are many good eggs. Many good men. |
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"Playing devils advocate - What about Mothers that let their sons get away with misbehaving, seen plenty of examples when picking kids up from school of gobby fishwives thinking their darling little sons are complete angels.
"
It's not just the son's it's the daughters too....just saying |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My oldest is a disrespectful shit with or without my help i think most its down to who they spend most time with i blame his mates
Teenage hormones?
It's not always the parents' fault, good point. Friends have an effect.
Parents who say it not always the parants fault should not be having kids."
It's not always the parents fault.
I have 3 respectful, hardworking children thank you. |
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By *ogNMuseCouple
over a year ago
Surrey |
"Playing devils advocate - What about Mothers that let their sons get away with misbehaving, seen plenty of examples when picking kids up from school of gobby fishwives thinking their darling little sons are complete angels.
It's not just the son's it's the daughters too....just saying "
I know that, but the op referred to sons |
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