FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Would you meet a wheelchair user?
Would you meet a wheelchair user?
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I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions. |
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"I would. I used to see a woman that used a wheelchair for a little while. I didn't meet her on Fab."
Thanks for the reply! Ahh I see, like a relationship-type thing? Just wondering how it differs from Fab meets. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honestly, it would put me off but based purely on the way I used to use fab (before I got wifed off)
Fab for me was a place to live out my fantasies and for that I needed rough, push me up against the door as soon as I walk in sex. I liked a man to dominate me, overpower me with his height, look down at me and make me feel small and dainty.
Now if the question was would it put me off having a relationship with wheelchair user, absolutely not.
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"Honestly, it would put me off but based purely on the way I used to use fab (before I got wifed off)
Fab for me was a place to live out my fantasies and for that I needed rough, push me up against the door as soon as I walk in sex. I liked a man to dominate me, overpower me with his height, look down at me and make me feel small and dainty.
Now if the question was would it put me off having a relationship with wheelchair user, absolutely not.
"
I see, that's fair enough. Thanks for your response. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I found the person attractive and felt a connection before knowing they were in a wheelchair, it wouldn't change my mind once I did know.
BTW, your pics are hot. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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90% of the time it would put me off and I wouldn't meet them. I'm shit at tact and I'd no doubt piss the person off by saying something stupid. (I piss everyone off, not just wheelchair users!)
If for some weird reason we got on then yes I would meet them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions."
In a heartbeat... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A wheelchair makes no difference if we're attracted to each other. It definitely wouldn't put us off if there is a connection. Anybody that passes you by because of it is missing out from what I can see |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A wheelchair makes no difference if we're attracted to each other. It definitely wouldn't put us off if there is a connection. Anybody that passes you by because of it is missing out from what I can see "
Exactly what I thought and he is better for it, shouldn’t waste your time on superficial people |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you very much everyone, giving me a lot more hope!"
Unfortunately there are a lot of people on here who are so far up their own arse they’re nearly popping out their own neck... picture that You’re welcome |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A wheelchair makes no difference if we're attracted to each other. It definitely wouldn't put us off if there is a connection. Anybody that passes you by because of it is missing out from what I can see
Exactly what I thought and he is better for it, shouldn’t waste your time on superficial people "
It's not superficial if it doesn't fit in with your fantasy or whatever you use fab for. I wouldn't have met women or men shorter than me either as they wouldn't fulfil my fantasy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A wheelchair makes no difference if we're attracted to each other. It definitely wouldn't put us off if there is a connection. Anybody that passes you by because of it is missing out from what I can see
Exactly what I thought and he is better for it, shouldn’t waste your time on superficial people
It's not superficial if it doesn't fit in with your fantasy or whatever you use fab for. I wouldn't have met women or men shorter than me either as they wouldn't fulfil my fantasy."
Well if like his profile states, their fantasy was for him to can can for them, then I understand. But if they haven’t read his profile and then are suddenly put off buy a wheelchair. That’s on them... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In itself absolutely wouldn't put me off although for me there would be practical issues.
For example I don't drive so travelling is Tricky and my house is not accessible but I wouldn't just ignore you I would explain why it might be tricky and then see if we could sort something out.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A wheelchair makes no difference if we're attracted to each other. It definitely wouldn't put us off if there is a connection. Anybody that passes you by because of it is missing out from what I can see
Exactly what I thought and he is better for it, shouldn’t waste your time on superficial people
It's not superficial if it doesn't fit in with your fantasy or whatever you use fab for. I wouldn't have met women or men shorter than me either as they wouldn't fulfil my fantasy."
I agree with what you are saying, the wheelchair in itself isn't an issue but if somebody doesn't fit what you're looking for then you wouldn't meet them that makes complete sense.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you very much everyone, giving me a lot more hope!
Unfortunately there are a lot of people on here who are so far up their own arse they’re nearly popping out their own neck... picture that You’re welcome"
How are they up their own arse? Because they wouldn't meet someone in a wheelchair? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you very much everyone, giving me a lot more hope!
Unfortunately there are a lot of people on here who are so far up their own arse they’re nearly popping out their own neck... picture that You’re welcome
How are they up their own arse? Because they wouldn't meet someone in a wheelchair?"
No just in general, not related to this situation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you very much everyone, giving me a lot more hope!
Unfortunately there are a lot of people on here who are so far up their own arse they’re nearly popping out their own neck... picture that You’re welcome
How are they up their own arse? Because they wouldn't meet someone in a wheelchair?
No just in general, not related to this situation"
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I've met with a fabber who suffered a brain injury in a very bad car accident, this affects him physically as well as processing issues but he's funny, sarcastic etc and we got along well so it was fine for me.
Sadly we can't meet now as he can only do daytime meets and my new job makes that impossible. I'm attracted to the person. Physical appearance is secondary and a wheelchair wouldn't be a problem for me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A wheelchair makes no difference if we're attracted to each other. It definitely wouldn't put us off if there is a connection. Anybody that passes you by because of it is missing out from what I can see
Exactly what I thought and he is better for it, shouldn’t waste your time on superficial people
It's not superficial if it doesn't fit in with your fantasy or whatever you use fab for. I wouldn't have met women or men shorter than me either as they wouldn't fulfil my fantasy.
Well if like his profile states, their fantasy was for him to can can for them, then I understand. But if they haven’t read his profile and then are suddenly put off buy a wheelchair. That’s on them..."
But people are allowed to like what they like. Whether they read it in advance or get told it later on, it still doesn't make them superficial or up their own arse.
Agreed people should read profiles but they don't always do they |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A wheelchair makes no difference if we're attracted to each other. It definitely wouldn't put us off if there is a connection. Anybody that passes you by because of it is missing out from what I can see
Exactly what I thought and he is better for it, shouldn’t waste your time on superficial people
It's not superficial if it doesn't fit in with your fantasy or whatever you use fab for. I wouldn't have met women or men shorter than me either as they wouldn't fulfil my fantasy.
Well if like his profile states, their fantasy was for him to can can for them, then I understand. But if they haven’t read his profile and then are suddenly put off buy a wheelchair. That’s on them...
But people are allowed to like what they like. Whether they read it in advance or get told it later on, it still doesn't make them superficial or up their own arse.
Agreed people should read profiles but they don't always do they "
Some people are some people aren’t, as long as someone states that and doesn’t just block the person then that would be better! Common courtesy is always nice!
As long as OP is happy and doesn’t get disheartened and finds what he wants then awesome!!
P.S only deleted the one above because I put my reply in the quote xD Brain fart moment |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wish for you as I do my neice, who cannot weight bear. Happiness in any shape or form.
You look good bodily(I'm straight lol), I can only think your meets may vary, but like anything...in most cases,as a single guy you have less chances of meets here anyway.
best of luck and good post. |
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Nice body
And no wouldn’t put me off, your sense of humour shines through in your profile as well as your hot bod I did meet a wheelchair user once from here, we didn’t have sex but it wasn’t the chair that stopped us! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've met a girl in a chair before, she was awesome but things didn't work out as she just wanted a one off and after meeting her, I saw her as G/F material |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's the person not the chair they sit in that would attract us so yes we would meet a wheelchair user.....let's face it half the men on here cant use their brain let alone there legs... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I remember you’re super handsome as well. It’s difficult on here cos obviously there’s so many available men and when faced with the choice most women will go for someone that is able bodied.
It would raise questions like how would the sex go down, would the woman have to go on top, how much can you do etc.
I think you need someone to love you or have more of an emotional connection rather than just the sexual side. |
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I was in a decent conversation with a wheelchair user a few years ago, with a view to meet ... Then he made some pretty nasty homophobic comments which turned me right off him....
So I would, and nearly did....
Btw, liberty elite is a good club for wheelchair users. Access to most of the facilities.
(No help to OP though as too far I suppose) |
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By *ngelina4uWoman
over a year ago
Camberley/Middleton |
"I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions."
I would if I was attracted to them I wouldn't out of pity though. Strange you don't accommodate but travel if your movement is severely limited have you thought it may put many off as few houses are wheelchair accessible. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me it's a no on fab for the exact same reasons that Polly said.
I want a dominant man who can over power me. I want to enjoy a variety of positions during a meet. That doesn't make me superficial it's just a preference when meeting for sex. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would. "
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
"
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason"
So where does being prejudice come into it? |
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By *bwplaydateMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and travel/hotel |
Probably a lot of fear - not knowing what to expect or see.
Like most things, humans get desensitised to everything. A good person will find out and take the time to see you for who you are.
Patience on both sides. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it? "
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice. "
I don't think it is.
Would I be prejudice for saying no to a woman because she doesn't have a penis? Would that be deemed sex discrimination?
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By *wingfellowMan
over a year ago
my own little sanctuary |
"Honestly, it would put me off but based purely on the way I used to use fab (before I got wifed off)
Fab for me was a place to live out my fantasies and for that I needed rough, push me up against the door as soon as I walk in sex. I liked a man to dominate me, overpower me with his height, look down at me and make me feel small and dainty.
Now if the question was would it put me off having a relationship with wheelchair user, absolutely not.
"
Don’t tell me the lovely pollyanna has returned? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Honestly, it would put me off but based purely on the way I used to use fab (before I got wifed off)
Fab for me was a place to live out my fantasies and for that I needed rough, push me up against the door as soon as I walk in sex. I liked a man to dominate me, overpower me with his height, look down at me and make me feel small and dainty.
Now if the question was would it put me off having a relationship with wheelchair user, absolutely not.
Don’t tell me the lovely pollyanna has returned? "
Hello you couldn't keep away could I x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No its not my thing even if i was meeting
I'm not quite sure what you mean by that.
Somebody with a disability isn't your thing!
" no its not something i look for in a sexual partner if it was say s wife who got say ms or something thats different
but for a stranger that id want to have sex with its not what i want so not my thing at all so no point meeting them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes, wouldn't be a problem to meet a lady in a wheelchair providing mutual attraction there. Only barrier I could foresee is property logistics if they couldn't accommodate as I have stairs at front and back of the property |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Definitely don’t give up! Your profile is great, love your lips and that cheeky smile, you can tell your eye candy from that little bit of what you can see!! Funny, polite, what’s not too like other than you being miles away!!
Anyone that ignores you or let’s you down, there is something wrong with them-not you,
S xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have had a few encounters with a wheelchair user in the past. At first I was actually scared. Worried I would hurt him or do something wrong.
However it was fine and the chair really didn't factor.
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"A wheelchair makes no difference if we're attracted to each other. It definitely wouldn't put us off if there is a connection. Anybody that passes you by because of it is missing out from what I can see
Exactly what I thought and he is better for it, shouldn’t waste your time on superficial people "
Why is it if someone has certain preferences they're superficial?
Our criteria for friends and loved ones differ for some to sexual partners.
For me, my playmates have to be white, alpha males who are submissive. For a partner equal partnership and colour not an issue. |
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I really would like to think I was big enough for it not to bother me. Truth is I think it would.
In the real work if I had got to know the person and felt attraction and that certain something then maybe I might.
I don't think that chatting to someone on fab would be enough for me to feel that way.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get off on giving pleasure and don't have a specific type or anything, so if the mental connection was there I'd not have any issues meeting them.... In fact I'd probably enjoy trying to incorporate the wheelchair and or disability into the play in new and interesting kinky ways that give us both pleasure..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really would like to think I was big enough for it not to bother me. Truth is I think it would.
In the real work if I had got to know the person and felt attraction and that certain something then maybe I might.
I don't think that chatting to someone on fab would be enough for me to feel that way.
"
I agree with this but couldn’t think how to word it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions."
Nope, wouldn't put me off. I always have a social first, to be sure that there's a connection, a wheelchair wouldn't change that.
Those that don't want to meet because yr in a wheelchair aren't worth meeting.
Very hot pics btw x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions."
Wouldn't bother me. If we're both horny and know what each other wants then do it. Your still the same in a wheelchair, it doesn't make you not human x |
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice. "
Thanks for the response. I suppose it's prejudging based on what they think that person's limitations are, but being unable to move my legs is already a pretty big limitation that it isn't unfair discrimination for declining a meet.
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though. |
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By *adeiteWoman
over a year ago
Staffordshire |
Does being in a wheel chair affect your dick?
Plenty of us ladies love to be on top and take control. And from what I see, you've got a very nice body and he definitely works.
I have met people in wheelchairs in the past. Makes no difference to me. If they're utter twats however then there won't be a second meet.
If they're being dicks to you then they weren't worth meeting in the first place. You've saved your time and effort really |
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"Does being in a wheel chair affect your dick?
Plenty of us ladies love to be on top and take control. And from what I see, you've got a very nice body and he definitely works.
I have met people in wheelchairs in the past. Makes no difference to me. If they're utter twats however then there won't be a second meet.
If they're being dicks to you then they weren't worth meeting in the first place. You've saved your time and effort really "
Thanks for the response. It doesn't affect my ability to get hard fortunately, but it does mean I can't ejaculate. Which is a bad thing as obviously a lot of people want that, but also a good thing as it means I stay hard after an orgasm and can have multiple orgasms. |
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I’ve had a couple of chats with wheelchair users on fabswingers. After messaging back and forth with them they wasn’t for me. It had nothing to do with the wheelchair as I knew this from the start, we just weren’t a match. |
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I would more than likely make it an immediate no go.
I'm thinking along the lines of not knowing someone and NOT wanting to ask all the Q's I'd need to ask to make a decision.
Things could be different if I knew the person first though.
It's an interesting question really. Do I say no and miss a possibility or do I keep looking for a 'lesser' experience..... hmmmmmm ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does being in a wheel chair affect your dick?
Plenty of us ladies love to be on top and take control. And from what I see, you've got a very nice body and he definitely works.
I have met people in wheelchairs in the past. Makes no difference to me. If they're utter twats however then there won't be a second meet.
If they're being dicks to you then they weren't worth meeting in the first place. You've saved your time and effort really
Thanks for the response. It doesn't affect my ability to get hard fortunately, but it does mean I can't ejaculate. Which is a bad thing as obviously a lot of people want that, but also a good thing as it means I stay hard after an orgasm and can have multiple orgasms."
But there are also people who don’t mind that, a lot of people are also interested in giving someone else an amazing experience and not just focusing on their own pleasure. Everyone is on this site for different reasons, I’d meet you in a flash knowing all this about you... |
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice.
Thanks for the response. I suppose it's prejudging based on what they think that person's limitations are, but being unable to move my legs is already a pretty big limitation that it isn't unfair discrimination for declining a meet.
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though."
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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But imagine how it feels to have all your faculties and all your old wants, desires and needs yet because you’re in a wheelchair everybody passes you by. It’s actually quite heartbreaking and that goes for anyone in this situation. We’re all breakable, anything could happen that could take away our mobility or any body function yet are brains are still the same.
I do believe that the op needs to find someone that loves him and all of him and there needs to be some kind of bond which is deeper than just sex. When you love a person and have feelings for them you see past any limitations. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"But imagine how it feels to have all your faculties and all your old wants, desires and needs yet because you’re in a wheelchair everybody passes you by. It’s actually quite heartbreaking and that goes for anyone in this situation. We’re all breakable, anything could happen that could take away our mobility or any body function yet are brains are still the same.
I do believe that the op needs to find someone that loves him and all of him and there needs to be some kind of bond which is deeper than just sex. When you love a person and have feelings for them you see past any limitations. "
Well said. Anyone of us could end up in one... |
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice.
Thanks for the response. I suppose it's prejudging based on what they think that person's limitations are, but being unable to move my legs is already a pretty big limitation that it isn't unfair discrimination for declining a meet.
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though.
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier. "
Thanks for your response. I completely agree with you, I don't mean to appear self-pitying and I certainly do not feel entitled to a meet because I'm in a wheelchair. I hope I didn't give that impression.
By 'give me a chance' I mean for the people I'm talking to to inquire a little more into what I am actually capable of, to let me fully explain what my situation entails rather than immediately dropping contact. Or at least to say it's not their thing.
I am very aware we don't have universal appeal, and that some people would prefer not to be with someone in a wheelchair/overweight/short etc. no matter what else they offer. That's fine, I have my own preferences too. But I imagine if every time you mentioned your frame people immediately broke contact you'd find that pretty disheartening. |
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By the way, thanks to everyone for their responses, I don't want to clog up the feed by responding to everyone but I have read what you've all written.
Your opinions and honesty are pure gold (particularly as these are perspectives I don't often get to hear), so I really appreciate it. |
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"By the way, thanks to everyone for their responses, I don't want to clog up the feed by responding to everyone but I have read what you've all written.
Your opinions and honesty are pure gold (particularly as these are perspectives I don't often get to hear), so I really appreciate it.
Pimo up your wheelchair. Still an Audi badge on the front. Women love Audi drivers!! Yeah stay strong butty! Ignore the haters they're just jealous of your origami skills!! "
I'm trying to figure out how to make my chair beep when I reverse. I think that would be useful for me and other people's toes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"By the way, thanks to everyone for their responses, I don't want to clog up the feed by responding to everyone but I have read what you've all written.
Your opinions and honesty are pure gold (particularly as these are perspectives I don't often get to hear), so I really appreciate it."
Pimp up your wheelchair. Stick an Audi badge on the front. Women love Audi drivers!! Yeah stay strong butty! Ignore the haters they're just jealous of your origami skills!! |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"By the way, thanks to everyone for their responses, I don't want to clog up the feed by responding to everyone but I have read what you've all written.
Your opinions and honesty are pure gold (particularly as these are perspectives I don't often get to hear), so I really appreciate it.
Pimo up your wheelchair. Still an Audi badge on the front. Women love Audi drivers!! Yeah stay strong butty! Ignore the haters they're just jealous of your origami skills!!
I'm trying to figure out how to make my chair beep when I reverse. I think that would be useful for me and other people's toes."
You do it lol. Just shout beep. |
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"By the way, thanks to everyone for their responses, I don't want to clog up the feed by responding to everyone but I have read what you've all written.
Your opinions and honesty are pure gold (particularly as these are perspectives I don't often get to hear), so I really appreciate it.
Pimo up your wheelchair. Still an Audi badge on the front. Women love Audi drivers!! Yeah stay strong butty! Ignore the haters they're just jealous of your origami skills!!
I'm trying to figure out how to make my chair beep when I reverse. I think that would be useful for me and other people's toes.
You do it lol. Just shout beep. "
On a night out I did d*unkenly shout 'Beep beep, I'm a jeep' when going downhill. Seemed to work! |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice.
Thanks for the response. I suppose it's prejudging based on what they think that person's limitations are, but being unable to move my legs is already a pretty big limitation that it isn't unfair discrimination for declining a meet.
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though.
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier.
Thanks for your response. I completely agree with you, I don't mean to appear self-pitying and I certainly do not feel entitled to a meet because I'm in a wheelchair. I hope I didn't give that impression.
By 'give me a chance' I mean for the people I'm talking to to inquire a little more into what I am actually capable of, to let me fully explain what my situation entails rather than immediately dropping contact. Or at least to say it's not their thing.
I am very aware we don't have universal appeal, and that some people would prefer not to be with someone in a wheelchair/overweight/short etc. no matter what else they offer. That's fine, I have my own preferences too.
***But I imagine if every time you mentioned your frame people immediately broke contact you'd find that pretty disheartening. "
*** This- yes it happens to other people all the time, for multiple reasons. Veris, hair, weight, height, age, etc.
If people are breaking contact that means they have messaged you. Many men don't even get replies at all. This probably sounds like a shit 'win', but you're already doing better than most men. |
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By *zamiWoman
over a year ago
LONDON |
"I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions."
Im curious - how do you get to meets? |
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice.
Thanks for the response. I suppose it's prejudging based on what they think that person's limitations are, but being unable to move my legs is already a pretty big limitation that it isn't unfair discrimination for declining a meet.
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though.
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier.
Thanks for your response. I completely agree with you, I don't mean to appear self-pitying and I certainly do not feel entitled to a meet because I'm in a wheelchair. I hope I didn't give that impression.
By 'give me a chance' I mean for the people I'm talking to to inquire a little more into what I am actually capable of, to let me fully explain what my situation entails rather than immediately dropping contact. Or at least to say it's not their thing.
I am very aware we don't have universal appeal, and that some people would prefer not to be with someone in a wheelchair/overweight/short etc. no matter what else they offer. That's fine, I have my own preferences too.
***But I imagine if every time you mentioned your frame people immediately broke contact you'd find that pretty disheartening.
*** This- yes it happens to other people all the time, for multiple reasons. Veris, hair, weight, height, age, etc.
If people are breaking contact that means they have messaged you. Many men don't even get replies at all. This probably sounds like a shit 'win', but you're already doing better than most men. "
Yeah I understand, just wanted a bit of an overview how much of an obstacle being in a wheelchair is for different people |
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"I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions.
Im curious - how do you get to meets? "
I can drive to them. My car has a push-pull handle accelerator, which I find more fun than when I drove before my injury |
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"But imagine how it feels to have all your faculties and all your old wants, desires and needs yet because you’re in a wheelchair everybody passes you by. It’s actually quite heartbreaking and that goes for anyone in this situation. We’re all breakable, anything could happen that could take away our mobility or any body function yet are brains are still the same.
I do believe that the op needs to find someone that loves him and all of him and there needs to be some kind of bond which is deeper than just sex. When you love a person and have feelings for them you see past any limitations. "
I agree in as much that friends, partners etc come in all shapes and sizes etc, but for no strings sex some people have different criteria.
It doesn't mean because you're not someone's sexual cup of java that words like "superficial, shallow" etc get bandied about. I also think there are people who play to the gallery and say what is "right" as opposed to what's honest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
This is not a criticism on your ability in a wheel Chair. But as we live on a very rough unadopted road. And with all the steps not only inside our house but also those to the front door. And the staircase that turns 180degree. We don't think it would be suitable to meet a wheelchair user |
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice.
Thanks for the response. I suppose it's prejudging based on what they think that person's limitations are, but being unable to move my legs is already a pretty big limitation that it isn't unfair discrimination for declining a meet.
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though.
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier.
Thanks for your response. I completely agree with you, I don't mean to appear self-pitying and I certainly do not feel entitled to a meet because I'm in a wheelchair. I hope I didn't give that impression.
By 'give me a chance' I mean for the people I'm talking to to inquire a little more into what I am actually capable of, to let me fully explain what my situation entails rather than immediately dropping contact. Or at least to say it's not their thing.
I am very aware we don't have universal appeal, and that some people would prefer not to be with someone in a wheelchair/overweight/short etc. no matter what else they offer. That's fine, I have my own preferences too. But I imagine if every time you mentioned your frame people immediately broke contact you'd find that pretty disheartening. "
No I don't find it disheartening because I am what I am, make it crystal clear what I am and my pictures are full and clear.
I also realise what site I'm on. If I wanted deep and meaningful I wouldn't be looking for it here. I wouldn't expect people to conduct a q&a session to find out certain things about me...I don't expect or assume.
I do struggle though to understand people who themselves have preferences not being prepared to accept the preferences of others. |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"By the way, thanks to everyone for their responses, I don't want to clog up the feed by responding to everyone but I have read what you've all written.
Your opinions and honesty are pure gold (particularly as these are perspectives I don't often get to hear), so I really appreciate it.
Pimo up your wheelchair. Still an Audi badge on the front. Women love Audi drivers!! Yeah stay strong butty! Ignore the haters they're just jealous of your origami skills!!
I'm trying to figure out how to make my chair beep when I reverse. I think that would be useful for me and other people's toes.
You do it lol. Just shout beep.
On a night out I did d*unkenly shout 'Beep beep, I'm a jeep' when going downhill. Seemed to work!"
Well done that man!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I haven't an issue with wheelchairs or disability, it's about personality and attractiveness.
With you, you're out of my age range - sorry."
Mrsslowcum... you have a fascinating profile... what an idea for a B&B!
You have any details about this? |
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"But imagine how it feels to have all your faculties and all your old wants, desires and needs yet because you’re in a wheelchair everybody passes you by. It’s actually quite heartbreaking and that goes for anyone in this situation. We’re all breakable, anything could happen that could take away our mobility or any body function yet are brains are still the same.
I do believe that the op needs to find someone that loves him and all of him and there needs to be some kind of bond which is deeper than just sex. When you love a person and have feelings for them you see past any limitations.
I agree in as much that friends, partners etc come in all shapes and sizes etc, but for no strings sex some people have different criteria.
It doesn't mean because you're not someone's sexual cup of java that words like "superficial, shallow" etc get bandied about. I also think there are people who play to the gallery and say what is "right" as opposed to what's honest."
I was just thinking this about this thread..
It doesn't mean because you're not someone's sexual cup of java that words like "superficial, shallow" etc get bandied about. I also think there are people who play to the gallery and say what is "right" as opposed to what's honest.
|
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice.
Thanks for the response. I suppose it's prejudging based on what they think that person's limitations are, but being unable to move my legs is already a pretty big limitation that it isn't unfair discrimination for declining a meet.
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though.
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier.
Thanks for your response. I completely agree with you, I don't mean to appear self-pitying and I certainly do not feel entitled to a meet because I'm in a wheelchair. I hope I didn't give that impression.
By 'give me a chance' I mean for the people I'm talking to to inquire a little more into what I am actually capable of, to let me fully explain what my situation entails rather than immediately dropping contact. Or at least to say it's not their thing.
I am very aware we don't have universal appeal, and that some people would prefer not to be with someone in a wheelchair/overweight/short etc. no matter what else they offer. That's fine, I have my own preferences too. But I imagine if every time you mentioned your frame people immediately broke contact you'd find that pretty disheartening.
No I don't find it disheartening because I am what I am, make it crystal clear what I am and my pictures are full and clear.
I also realise what site I'm on. If I wanted deep and meaningful I wouldn't be looking for it here. I wouldn't expect people to conduct a q&a session to find out certain things about me...I don't expect or assume.
I do struggle though to understand people who themselves have preferences not being prepared to accept the preferences of others."
I'm not sure I've explained myself particularly well, I definitely do accept the preferences of others, and don't feel entitled to anything, and I do accept my situation may limit who is interested.
I'm also not looking for deep and meaningful interactions either, I wanted to know what extent my situation is sexually limiting in other people's eyes and if previous conversations I've had are a complete representation of that.
But I do like your honesty and forthrightness, as I know some people may be less direct and not tell me what they actually think. So I'm very grateful for that, thank you! |
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice.
Thanks for the response. I suppose it's prejudging based on what they think that person's limitations are, but being unable to move my legs is already a pretty big limitation that it isn't unfair discrimination for declining a meet.
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though.
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier.
Thanks for your response. I completely agree with you, I don't mean to appear self-pitying and I certainly do not feel entitled to a meet because I'm in a wheelchair. I hope I didn't give that impression.
By 'give me a chance' I mean for the people I'm talking to to inquire a little more into what I am actually capable of, to let me fully explain what my situation entails rather than immediately dropping contact. Or at least to say it's not their thing.
I am very aware we don't have universal appeal, and that some people would prefer not to be with someone in a wheelchair/overweight/short etc. no matter what else they offer. That's fine, I have my own preferences too. But I imagine if every time you mentioned your frame people immediately broke contact you'd find that pretty disheartening.
No I don't find it disheartening because I am what I am, make it crystal clear what I am and my pictures are full and clear.
I also realise what site I'm on. If I wanted deep and meaningful I wouldn't be looking for it here. I wouldn't expect people to conduct a q&a session to find out certain things about me...I don't expect or assume.
I do struggle though to understand people who themselves have preferences not being prepared to accept the preferences of others.
I'm not sure I've explained myself particularly well, I definitely do accept the preferences of others, and don't feel entitled to anything, and I do accept my situation may limit who is interested.
I'm also not looking for deep and meaningful interactions either, I wanted to know what extent my situation is sexually limiting in other people's eyes and if previous conversations I've had are a complete representation of that.
But I do like your honesty and forthrightness, as I know some people may be less direct and not tell me what they actually think. So I'm very grateful for that, thank you! "
I hope I'm not coming across as rude. I just get annoyed when people ask a question (on and off Fab) and people blow smoke to be disingenuous rather than be honest.
I think your attitude to responses on this thread shows you as a really nice person. |
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice.
Thanks for the response. I suppose it's prejudging based on what they think that person's limitations are, but being unable to move my legs is already a pretty big limitation that it isn't unfair discrimination for declining a meet.
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though.
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier.
Thanks for your response. I completely agree with you, I don't mean to appear self-pitying and I certainly do not feel entitled to a meet because I'm in a wheelchair. I hope I didn't give that impression.
By 'give me a chance' I mean for the people I'm talking to to inquire a little more into what I am actually capable of, to let me fully explain what my situation entails rather than immediately dropping contact. Or at least to say it's not their thing.
I am very aware we don't have universal appeal, and that some people would prefer not to be with someone in a wheelchair/overweight/short etc. no matter what else they offer. That's fine, I have my own preferences too. But I imagine if every time you mentioned your frame people immediately broke contact you'd find that pretty disheartening.
No I don't find it disheartening because I am what I am, make it crystal clear what I am and my pictures are full and clear.
I also realise what site I'm on. If I wanted deep and meaningful I wouldn't be looking for it here. I wouldn't expect people to conduct a q&a session to find out certain things about me...I don't expect or assume.
I do struggle though to understand people who themselves have preferences not being prepared to accept the preferences of others.
I'm not sure I've explained myself particularly well, I definitely do accept the preferences of others, and don't feel entitled to anything, and I do accept my situation may limit who is interested.
I'm also not looking for deep and meaningful interactions either, I wanted to know what extent my situation is sexually limiting in other people's eyes and if previous conversations I've had are a complete representation of that.
But I do like your honesty and forthrightness, as I know some people may be less direct and not tell me what they actually think. So I'm very grateful for that, thank you!
I hope I'm not coming across as rude. I just get annoyed when people ask a question (on and off Fab) and people blow smoke to be disingenuous rather than be honest.
I think your attitude to responses on this thread shows you as a really nice person. "
No, you haven't come across as rude at all, there's nothing wrong with being direct. I want to know what people think so I really appreciate your messages. All the best. |
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"Everybody should be treated the same as everyone else. With total respect.
Prejudice is truly a terrible word and practiced by far too many.
So of course I would.
You can respectfully decline to meet someone in a wheelchair if it isn't something you feel would satisfy your sexual needs.
Of course you can. Just the same as you would respectfully decline anyone for the same reason
So where does being prejudice come into it?
Just saying no purely based upon disability is prejudice.
Thanks for the response. I suppose it's prejudging based on what they think that person's limitations are, but being unable to move my legs is already a pretty big limitation that it isn't unfair discrimination for declining a meet.
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though.
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier.
Thanks for your response. I completely agree with you, I don't mean to appear self-pitying and I certainly do not feel entitled to a meet because I'm in a wheelchair. I hope I didn't give that impression.
By 'give me a chance' I mean for the people I'm talking to to inquire a little more into what I am actually capable of, to let me fully explain what my situation entails rather than immediately dropping contact. Or at least to say it's not their thing.
I am very aware we don't have universal appeal, and that some people would prefer not to be with someone in a wheelchair/overweight/short etc. no matter what else they offer. That's fine, I have my own preferences too. But I imagine if every time you mentioned your frame people immediately broke contact you'd find that pretty disheartening.
No I don't find it disheartening because I am what I am, make it crystal clear what I am and my pictures are full and clear.
I also realise what site I'm on. If I wanted deep and meaningful I wouldn't be looking for it here. I wouldn't expect people to conduct a q&a session to find out certain things about me...I don't expect or assume.
I do struggle though to understand people who themselves have preferences not being prepared to accept the preferences of others.
I'm not sure I've explained myself particularly well, I definitely do accept the preferences of others, and don't feel entitled to anything, and I do accept my situation may limit who is interested.
I'm also not looking for deep and meaningful interactions either, I wanted to know what extent my situation is sexually limiting in other people's eyes and if previous conversations I've had are a complete representation of that.
But I do like your honesty and forthrightness, as I know some people may be less direct and not tell me what they actually think. So I'm very grateful for that, thank you! "
I think that you have come accross really well.
I wouldn't even be thinking about this situation until I saw your post. I have never come accross a wheelchair user before on fab.
It is good to see you here x |
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"
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though.
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier. "
Wow, entitled? The OP doesn't come across as that at all imo.
I read from that he was asking on a human level for people to pause, suspend their haste, and see him as a person first before they contemplated the fact he uses a wheelchair.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Reading through the thread I have noticed one or two women who say no because of the dynamic they are looking for (strong man standing), a lot saying no because they have inaccessible properties and a lot saying they will make it work.
And before we head down the "but I only play in my house for my safety / all my toys are all there..." The bottom line is would people meet a wheelchair user.
Rather than throwing up a multitude of barriers that the op is quite graceful as he takes it on the chin, ask yourself if the practicalities are worth overcoming for what could be the most amazing night of your life.
I have colleagues and friends who have mobility issues. Their ingenuity in getting round these are an inspiration.
I suppose I'm questioning why throw up barriers? We are all entitled to like what we like and have a "preference" but can people not be flexible in their arrangements for the right person? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Reading through the thread I have noticed one or two women who say no because of the dynamic they are looking for (strong man standing), a lot saying no because they have inaccessible properties and a lot saying they will make it work.
And before we head down the "but I only play in my house for my safety / all my toys are all there..." The bottom line is would people meet a wheelchair user.
Rather than throwing up a multitude of barriers that the op is quite graceful as he takes it on the chin, ask yourself if the practicalities are worth overcoming for what could be the most amazing night of your life.
I have colleagues and friends who have mobility issues. Their ingenuity in getting round these are an inspiration.
I suppose I'm questioning why throw up barriers? We are all entitled to like what we like and have a "preference" but can people not be flexible in their arrangements for the right person?"
Perhaps people *are* flexible for the right person.
I know what my own limits are and I wouldn't meet someone outside those limits. They're not missing out on anything- it simply means we're not compatible. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I don't have a problem with people preferring to meet someone able bodied (I would too) as it seems less complicated. However, I just wish they would give me a chance or ask questions, as I'm a lot less limited than I think most would expect and they may discover the things I can't do would've override the things I can. I do understand it's a difficult topic to approach though.
But why should someone "give you a chance" because you're in a wheelchair? You're not entitled to a meet.
I wouldn't ask someone who prefers petite women say, to give my fat frame a chance.
We do not have universal appeal. Accepting that fact would make life so much easier.
Wow, entitled? The OP doesn't come across as that at all imo.
I read from that he was asking on a human level for people to pause, suspend their haste, and see him as a person first before they contemplated the fact he uses a wheelchair.
"
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"Reading through the thread I have noticed one or two women who say no because of the dynamic they are looking for (strong man standing), a lot saying no because they have inaccessible properties and a lot saying they will make it work.
And before we head down the "but I only play in my house for my safety / all my toys are all there..." The bottom line is would people meet a wheelchair user.
Rather than throwing up a multitude of barriers that the op is quite graceful as he takes it on the chin, ask yourself if the practicalities are worth overcoming for what could be the most amazing night of your life.
I have colleagues and friends who have mobility issues. Their ingenuity in getting round these are an inspiration.
I suppose I'm questioning why throw up barriers? We are all entitled to like what we like and have a "preference" but can people not be flexible in their arrangements for the right person?
Perhaps people *are* flexible for the right person.
I know what my own limits are and I wouldn't meet someone outside those limits. They're not missing out on anything- it simply means we're not compatible. "
This!
Why do some people think others should adapt and make exceptions? Have we become so used to "reasonable adjustments" in the workplace that we believe this should be transferred to our sexual lives?!!
I am not interested in women sexually, and no amount of "equality" is going to make me meet a woman for sex. But for some people, because a woman might be a very nice person, you can't tell who's licking you out if your eyes are closed etc, it shouldn't make a difference.
Well guess what buttercups - it does!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Reading through the thread I have noticed one or two women who say no because of the dynamic they are looking for (strong man standing), a lot saying no because they have inaccessible properties and a lot saying they will make it work.
And before we head down the "but I only play in my house for my safety / all my toys are all there..." The bottom line is would people meet a wheelchair user.
Rather than throwing up a multitude of barriers that the op is quite graceful as he takes it on the chin, ask yourself if the practicalities are worth overcoming for what could be the most amazing night of your life.
I have colleagues and friends who have mobility issues. Their ingenuity in getting round these are an inspiration.
I suppose I'm questioning why throw up barriers? We are all entitled to like what we like and have a "preference" but can people not be flexible in their arrangements for the right person?
Perhaps people *are* flexible for the right person.
I know what my own limits are and I wouldn't meet someone outside those limits. They're not missing out on anything- it simply means we're not compatible.
This!
Why do some people think others should adapt and make exceptions? Have we become so used to "reasonable adjustments" in the workplace that we believe this should be transferred to our sexual lives?!!
I am not interested in women sexually, and no amount of "equality" is going to make me meet a woman for sex. But for some people, because a woman might be a very nice person, you can't tell who's licking you out if your eyes are closed etc, it shouldn't make a difference.
Well guess what buttercups - it does!
"
As far as taking things out of context goes, you have made an excellent job of taking the practicalities of access for a wheelchair and trying to work round it, to "but I'm not gay but do I have to start meeting women?"
You know exactly what I'm saying.
Not meeting a wheelchair user because you are not attracted to wheelchair users is completely different to it is impractical to meet at mine, let's work a way round it.
As I'm not in the popular club, I'll take my smackdown.
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Asked this 5 years ago I’d be very sure if I was attracted to someone then a wheelchair would make no difference to me in the slightest however now with my own disabilities it would like be a no but that more about what I can’t manage anymore and not the wheelchair user. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Reading through the thread I have noticed one or two women who say no because of the dynamic they are looking for (strong man standing), a lot saying no because they have inaccessible properties and a lot saying they will make it work.
And before we head down the "but I only play in my house for my safety / all my toys are all there..." The bottom line is would people meet a wheelchair user.
Rather than throwing up a multitude of barriers that the op is quite graceful as he takes it on the chin, ask yourself if the practicalities are worth overcoming for what could be the most amazing night of your life.
I have colleagues and friends who have mobility issues. Their ingenuity in getting round these are an inspiration.
I suppose I'm questioning why throw up barriers? We are all entitled to like what we like and have a "preference" but can people not be flexible in their arrangements for the right person?
Perhaps people *are* flexible for the right person.
I know what my own limits are and I wouldn't meet someone outside those limits. They're not missing out on anything- it simply means we're not compatible.
This!
Why do some people think others should adapt and make exceptions? Have we become so used to "reasonable adjustments" in the workplace that we believe this should be transferred to our sexual lives?!!
I am not interested in women sexually, and no amount of "equality" is going to make me meet a woman for sex. But for some people, because a woman might be a very nice person, you can't tell who's licking you out if your eyes are closed etc, it shouldn't make a difference.
Well guess what buttercups - it does!
As far as taking things out of context goes, you have made an excellent job of taking the practicalities of access for a wheelchair and trying to work round it, to "but I'm not gay but do I have to start meeting women?"
You know exactly what I'm saying.
Not meeting a wheelchair user because you are not attracted to wheelchair users is completely different to it is impractical to meet at mine, let's work a way round it.
As I'm not in the popular club, I'll take my smackdown.
"
Smackdown sounds fun.
I was agreeing with you both. I think we possibly all agree in fact. There's some things we will be flexible on and others definitely not.
Or... some people may use 'stairs' as an excuse to avoid hurting the person's feelings because they're not attracted to them. |
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"In itself absolutely wouldn't put me off although for me there would be practical issues.
For example I don't drive so travelling is Tricky and my house is not accessible but I wouldn't just ignore you I would explain why it might be tricky and then see if we could sort something out.
" lady with a heart |
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"I've met with a fabber who suffered a brain injury in a very bad car accident, this affects him physically as well as processing issues but he's funny, sarcastic etc and we got along well so it was fine for me.
Sadly we can't meet now as he can only do daytime meets and my new job makes that impossible. I'm attracted to the person. Physical appearance is secondary and a wheelchair wouldn't be a problem for me. " kind heart |
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"Nice body
And no wouldn’t put me off, your sense of humour shines through in your profile as well as your hot bod I did meet a wheelchair user once from here, we didn’t have sex but it wasn’t the chair that stopped us! " kind heart |
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"I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions.
I would if I was attracted to them I wouldn't out of pity though. Strange you don't accommodate but travel if your movement is severely limited have you thought it may put many off as few houses are wheelchair accessible. " kind heart |
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"I have had a few encounters with a wheelchair user in the past. At first I was actually scared. Worried I would hurt him or do something wrong.
However it was fine and the chair really didn't factor.
" kind heart |
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"I really would like to think I was big enough for it not to bother me. Truth is I think it would.
In the real work if I had got to know the person and felt attraction and that certain something then maybe I might.
I don't think that chatting to someone on fab would be enough for me to feel that way.
" xxxx |
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"I really would like to think I was big enough for it not to bother me. Truth is I think it would.
In the real work if I had got to know the person and felt attraction and that certain something then maybe I might.
I don't think that chatting to someone on fab would be enough for me to feel that way.
I agree with this but couldn’t think how to word it." x |
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"I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions.
Nope, wouldn't put me off. I always have a social first, to be sure that there's a connection, a wheelchair wouldn't change that.
Those that don't want to meet because yr in a wheelchair aren't worth meeting.
Very hot pics btw x" x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dating or sexual meets with a female who's in a wheel chair is 100% by me ..... as long as there's chemistry there ..
Few years back they were a stunning female on here in a wheelchair but her profile was absolutely shite . She defo had a bit of a bad attitude regarding her being in a wheelchair . Shame tbh caus she was flipping stunning x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have played with a wheel chair user before. Nothing about the experience was a turn off.
I think you’re sexy. And well disappointed you aren’t wheeling yourself around central Scotland |
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I missed this one! I'd meet a wheelchair user, but I am also a wheelchair user
Lots of people are put off by it. It's fairly obvious that disabled people are not seen as sexual beings by quite a lot of people.
The OP profile could be rather enticing, actually |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions."
I would. I'll be honest and say I wouldn't be a bit wary about the sex and what we could/couldn't do, but if i got on with someone and fancied tgem. It wouldn't put me off.
I think you look hot by the way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had a few conversations leading up to a meet, then when I mentioned I use a wheelchair I get ignored.
It says so on my profile so I don't feel like I'm misleading people. People often say it isn't an issue, but meets seem to deteriorate quickly when it comes up.
It's totally fine if it isn't someone's preference or seems impractical, and of course it could just be me, but it happens so often when I mention it that I'm losing faith.
Any honest opinions about meeting with wheelchair users very much appreciated, don't feel you need to sugar-coat your opinions."
Have you considered visiting a club first. If you haven’t, I think you’d find It an enjoyable and supportive experience with kind Fabbers. At Ketrels, I once had the privilege of sharing in some group fun with a lovely lady who happened to also be an amputee. Just a thought |
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"I dated a guy in a wheelchair, so I definitely would. You just have to find alternative ways to be physical, which can be alot more intimate."
Absolutely! A wheelchair is no barrier to intimacy at all. Just requires a different approach.
If we met or we're chatting to someone in a wheelchair and we got on well and things clicked, we'd absolutely meet them. No hesitation there! |
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"I dated a guy in a wheelchair, so I definitely would. You just have to find alternative ways to be physical, which can be alot more intimate.
Absolutely! A wheelchair is no barrier to intimacy at all. Just requires a different approach.
If we met or we're chatting to someone in a wheelchair and we got on well and things clicked, we'd absolutely meet them. No hesitation there!"
Same |
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