FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > If you need to talk, please, please talk....

If you need to talk, please, please talk....

By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

In light of the desperately sad news that Keith flint has taken his own life, this is just a little thread of support, I’m sure all of you lovely lot will join me in saying, please, please, if you’re feeling desperate then pick up the phone, talk, find someone to talk too, don’t think that others don’t want to listen, someone will always listen,family, a friend, a neighbour, Samaritans, your doctor, local hospital, pharmacy, mind, and many others, please take that first step, your precious and there will always be someone, somewhere that would be broken hearted without you, much love, Mrs blue eyesxxx

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By *ulfilthmentMan over a year ago

Just around the corner

Dad news indeed. We all know someone (or at leas I hope we do) who’ll listen without judging.

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By *ady LickWoman over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

As someone who has lost someone through suicide I echo your post 100%.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"In light of the desperately sad news that Keith flint has taken his own life, this is just a little thread of support, I’m sure all of you lovely lot will join me in saying, please, please, if you’re feeling desperate then pick up the phone, talk, find someone to talk too, don’t think that others don’t want to listen, someone will always listen,family, a friend, a neighbour, Samaritans, your doctor, local hospital, pharmacy, mind, and many others, please take that first step, your precious and there will always be someone, somewhere that would be broken hearted without you, much love, Mrs blue eyesxxx"

Absolutely

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Without a doubt.. Great thread

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sadly help comes too late in most cases.

GPs don't understand mental health enough and waiting lists to see CPN etc are months.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ads cousin took his own life just over two years ago in the most horrific way possible and I can’t stress how much people need to talk, my best friend then six months later took her own life and I knew nothing of her troubles (apart from her splitting from her partner of seven years) but I didn’t know she was suffering in slience over body issues etc, she was one of the most beautiful women both inside and out, I miss her terribly, I wish she spoke to me about all these things.

Ads and I are actually doing a firewalk in June in aid of mind and a new support group, it was too late to save them but hopefully we can try and save other people.

Always here if you need anything, anyone, even just to talk.

Danish x

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By *he Mac LassWoman over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

I agree with everything in the OP. Heartbreaking to see Liam Howletts response of “I’m shell shocked, fuckin angry, confused and heart broken...”.

10 years on and I still feel those emotions. Those that are left behind need support too and there are lots of organisations including CRUSE that can help.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"Sadly help comes too late in most cases.

GPs don't understand mental health enough and waiting lists to see CPN etc are months. "
. Whilst you’re so right in much of what you say, any little thing that tweakes someones mind and encourages them to talk has got to be a starting point, I’m not saying it’s going to save everyone but people have been saved by just speaking out, reaching out, I just wanted people to know that they are loved and someone, somewhere would want them to be ok, no matter how much they feel that it would end the pain and suffering in their mind, there is a light, it’s just a long tunnel it’s at the end of, they can be ok againxxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I agree with everything in the OP. Heartbreaking to see Liam Howletts response of “I’m shell shocked, fuckin angry, confused and heart broken...”.

10 years on and I still feel those emotions. Those that are left behind need support too and there are lots of organisations including CRUSE that can help.

How ads aunt and uncle cope I have no clue but they are a bloody inspiration.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"Ads cousin took his own life just over two years ago in the most horrific way possible and I can’t stress how much people need to talk, my best friend then six months later took her own life and I knew nothing of her troubles (apart from her splitting from her partner of seven years) but I didn’t know she was suffering in slience over body issues etc, she was one of the most beautiful women both inside and out, I miss her terribly, I wish she spoke to me about all these things.

Ads and I are actually doing a firewalk in June in aid of mind and a new support group, it was too late to save them but hopefully we can try and save other people.

Always here if you need anything, anyone, even just to talk.

Danish x"
. Sending you all the hugs in the world and be very proud of what you’re doing, because you’re showing that everyone matters, Mrs blue eyesxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sadly help comes too late in most cases.

GPs don't understand mental health enough and waiting lists to see CPN etc are months. . Whilst you’re so right in much of what you say, any little thing that tweakes someones mind and encourages them to talk has got to be a starting point, I’m not saying it’s going to save everyone but people have been saved by just speaking out, reaching out, I just wanted people to know that they are loved and someone, somewhere would want them to be ok, no matter how much they feel that it would end the pain and suffering in their mind, there is a light, it’s just a long tunnel it’s at the end of, they can be ok againxxx"

I know you did. I've been there and I'm one of the lucky ones with great support.

There is still such a stigma attached to mental illness

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ads and I are actually doing a firewalk in June in aid of mind and a new support group, it was too late to save them but hopefully we can try and save other people.

Always here if you need anything, anyone, even just to talk.

Danish x. Sending you all the hugs in the world and be very proud of what you’re doing, because you’re showing that everyone matters, Mrs blue eyesxx"

Thank you, everyone does matter, for example I helped a lady through Facebook just after my friend passed, I was feeling shitty but I actually helped this women, she lost her partner and couldn’t leave the house, for weeks on end she couldn’t even get out of bed but by us talking every day, I gave her little goals every day, just small ones and slowly over a couple of weeks she managed to walk to the local shop, she managed to go and speak to people, so this is why I can’t stress it enough.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"I agree with everything in the OP. Heartbreaking to see Liam Howletts response of “I’m shell shocked, fuckin angry, confused and heart broken...”.

10 years on and I still feel those emotions. Those that are left behind need support too and there are lots of organisations including CRUSE that can help.

Talking itself is not a cureall but it helps massively to get your thoughts and emotions in order whichever side of this you sit on. Take care of yourselves. It’s really bloody difficult but don’t do it alone x"
. Awww Mrs M, sending you so much love, i too still feel those emotions, I still blame myself at times, I wish that things had been so different, but we can’t change the past, so anything at all to help someone else’s future is all that I can try to do, you are so, so right, all of you that have any experience of loss, you need the help too, I second how bloody hard it is, and I too wish you all to take care of yourselves, much love, Mrs blue eyes xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x "

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not."

I do it all the time even though I'm not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not."

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"Sadly help comes too late in most cases.

I know you did. I've been there and I'm one of the lucky ones with great support.

There is still such a stigma attached to mental illness

"
. Awww sending you much love and thoughts, I’m so glad that you have a great support, be proud of yourself, it’s not way to come out of the other side I’m surexxx

There is still stigma, but it’s getting better all the time, we can all change this, little by little, if we stick togetherxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response. "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I do it all the time even though I'm not. "

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not."
. This is so true, but that one day, you might just say, actually I’m not ok, and that’s the day that you’re life may change for the better, you will still be brave, just in a different wayxx

Much love, Mrs blue eyes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fully agree - talk please

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.. This is so true, but that one day, you might just say, actually I’m not ok, and that’s the day that you’re life may change for the better, you will still be brave, just in a different wayxx

Much love, Mrs blue eyes"

Thank you xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response. "

I've found that people rarely actually want to know the answer.

I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react.

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By *ady LickWoman over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

"I agree with everything in the OP. Heartbreaking to see Liam Howletts response of “I’m shell shocked, fuckin angry, confused and heart broken...”.

10 years on and I still feel those emotions. Those that are left behind need support too and there are lots of organisations including CRUSE that can help.

'Survivers of Suicide' are also a very good charity, for family, friends, anyone affected.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I do it all the time even though I'm not. "
. That’s ok though, sometimes it easier to say you’re ok, as long as when you’re desperate, you find that person and you tell them that today you’re not ok, they will still be there for you, and actually probably relieved, because the chances are they knew you weren’t ok reallyxxx

Mrs blue eyes

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By *uzzy NavelWoman over a year ago

so near and yet so far....

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response.

I've found that people rarely actually want to know the answer.

I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react. "

Do you talk to someone when you feel this way?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response.

I've found that people rarely actually want to know the answer.

I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react. "

Don’t say that, my WhatsApp is always open to you as I’ve told you many times before xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Cant shut me up

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By *inkysexpotMan over a year ago

leeds

People can get stuck in a very dark place, it's not just them who need to look for help it's everyone else who needs to watch out for others too. Family, friends, work colleagues starting to act differently, not as chatty as they usually are, take the time to talk to them, ask if there ok. Might not be a big deal to you but it could really help them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response.

I've found that people rarely actually want to know the answer.

I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react.

Do you talk to someone when you feel this way?"

I do, I'm very lucky that I have a couple of people that I can actually say that to and they know what to do.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response.

I've found that people rarely actually want to know the answer.

I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react.

Don’t say that, my WhatsApp is always open to you as I’ve told you many times before xx"

I know. Thank you

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By *itty9899Man over a year ago

Craggy Island

What's the point when no one is prepared to listen or respond.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response.

I've found that people rarely actually want to know the answer.

I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react. "
. Awww hatter, hello lovely, I’m so sorry that you’re having a tough time, you’ve been brave and you’ve spoken out, I suppose there’s no advice for friends and family on how to cope when a loved one tells them that they are not ok, this maybe why they don’t know how to react, but there’s a good chance that they are keeping an eye on you and I would imagine trying to work out how to help you, keep talking to them, there’s no easy answer or miracle, I would like to believe that they love you dearly though and will find a way to help if they can, don’t forget, you have many friends here that will always listen, much love, Mrs blue eyes

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By *evils-couple13Couple over a year ago

Neath

I suffer with mental illness myself and I'm extremely lucky to have a good support next work around me, which is something most people don't have. Our inbox is open for those who need to talk.

Lady xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react. "

Message me, I'm happy to listen while you talk, rant, cry or just get stuff off your chest. Sometimes it's easier to talk to a stranger. Don't bottle it up.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"People can get stuck in a very dark place, it's not just them who need to look for help it's everyone else who needs to watch out for others too. Family, friends, work colleagues starting to act differently, not as chatty as they usually are, take the time to talk to them, ask if there ok. Might not be a big deal to you but it could really help them."
. Exactly thisxxx Mrs blue eyes xx

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By *uzzy NavelWoman over a year ago

so near and yet so far....

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response.

I've found that people rarely actually want to know the answer.

I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react.

Do you talk to someone when you feel this way?

I do, I'm very lucky that I have a couple of people that I can actually say that to and they know what to do."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response.

I've found that people rarely actually want to know the answer.

I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react.

Don’t say that, my WhatsApp is always open to you as I’ve told you many times before xx

I know. Thank you

I really mean it as well and it’s okay not to be okay xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What's the point when no one is prepared to listen or respond."

People are willing to listen. Message me if you want to talk.

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By *uzzy NavelWoman over a year ago

so near and yet so far....

"What's the point when no one is prepared to listen or respond."

Do you mean health professionals or family and friends?

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"What's the point when no one is prepared to listen or respond."
. Awww I’m sad you feel this way, someone will, somewhere, there’s always someone, you have to believe and give them a chance, please find that someone, they are out there, sending much love, Mrs blue eyesxxx

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"What's the point when no one is prepared to listen or respond.

People are willing to listen. Message me if you want to talk."
. This is so lovely, knew you lovely lot would be here for those that need youxxx

Mrs blue eyes

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response.

I've found that people rarely actually want to know the answer.

I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react.

Don’t say that, my WhatsApp is always open to you as I’ve told you many times before xx

I know. Thank you

I really mean it as well and it’s okay not to be okay xx"
. Awww love this, you fabbers are the loveliest bunch, I knew you’d all be here to listen for those that need it’s

Mrs blue eyes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think the biggest problem as somebody else has already said is people will often say "I'm here for you and we can talk anytime", and they generally do mean that at the time.

But then often by the time somebody says out loud that they're struggling particularly if it's very deep rooted or a long-term mental health issue professional help is what is needed but that is very difficult to come across.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"I suffer with mental illness myself and I'm extremely lucky to have a good support next work around me, which is something most people don't have. Our inbox is open for those who need to talk.

Lady xx"
. This is so lovely, sending you much love and positive thoughts, you are so brave and strong, be proudxx

Mrs blue eyes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes it’s something little like just asking someone - Are you ok ? x

And they tell you that they are fine (outsidely). But (inside) they are not.

I know , I’ve been there. Sometimes though it might get a different response.

I've found that people rarely actually want to know the answer.

I'm having a tough time at the moment, so I've tried to be honest with people and say 'no, I'm not okay.' And they don't know how to react. . Awww hatter, hello lovely, I’m so sorry that you’re having a tough time, you’ve been brave and you’ve spoken out, I suppose there’s no advice for friends and family on how to cope when a loved one tells them that they are not ok, this maybe why they don’t know how to react, but there’s a good chance that they are keeping an eye on you and I would imagine trying to work out how to help you, keep talking to them, there’s no easy answer or miracle, I would like to believe that they love you dearly though and will find a way to help if they can, don’t forget, you have many friends here that will always listen, much love, Mrs blue eyes "

I'm lucky, I know the people who I can be real with when I need to.

Love

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Didn't notice this... Devastated!

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By *itty9899Man over a year ago

Craggy Island

"What's the point when no one is prepared to listen or respond.

People are willing to listen. Message me if you want to talk."

Thanks

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By *itty9899Man over a year ago

Craggy Island

"What's the point when no one is prepared to listen or respond.

Do you mean health professionals or family and friends?"

Both.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"I think the biggest problem as somebody else has already said is people will often say "I'm here for you and we can talk anytime", and they generally do mean that at the time.

When you suffer with a severe mental illness you don't want to feel like all you ever do is moan to people because it just makes you feel like more of a burden and that people will want to avoid you because you're always negative or sad ,so it's much easier to pretend that everything is ok and be light-hearted but then the effort of trying to pretend to be ok is suffocating and just adds to the problem so it's just a never-ending loop. "
. Aww lovely, i know much of what you say is so true, and it’s how you feel, but in reality, there will be people that live you dearly and will not worry about how down you are or for how long, as long as they can be your stepping stone to getting the help you need then let them help, tell them how your feeling, don’t feel guilty or worry, people around you are stronger than you think, if you need them then tell themxxx

Sending hugs, Mrs blue eyes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I think the biggest problem as somebody else has already said is people will often say "I'm here for you and we can talk anytime", and they generally do mean that at the time.

When you suffer with a severe mental illness you don't want to feel like all you ever do is moan to people because it just makes you feel like more of a burden and that people will want to avoid you because you're always negative or sad ,so it's much easier to pretend that everything is ok and be light-hearted but then the effort of trying to pretend to be ok is suffocating and just adds to the problem so it's just a never-ending loop. . Aww lovely, i know much of what you say is so true, and it’s how you feel, but in reality, there will be people that live you dearly and will not worry about how down you are or for how long, as long as they can be your stepping stone to getting the help you need then let them help, tell them how your feeling, don’t feel guilty or worry, people around you are stronger than you think, if you need them then tell themxxx

Sending hugs, Mrs blue eyes"

I don't mean to put a damper on things I understand people trying to help and I can assure you it's very much appreciated threads like this.

I think the problem is we all like to think that there will be someone there when we really need them but that really isn't always the case. Especially if people around you don't really understand mental health issues or they just want to fix you and they can't so they just end up walking away because gets too much for them too I guess I wouldn't want to be around someone that was negative all the time.

Oh god now I just sound negative and I guess I am sometimes everyone has a lot going on in their lives so it's easier not to bother them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"I think the biggest problem as somebody else has already said is people will often say "I'm here for you and we can talk anytime", and they generally do mean that at the time.

When you suffer with a severe mental illness you don't want to feel like all you ever do is moan to people because it just makes you feel like more of a burden and that people will want to avoid you because you're always negative or sad ,so it's much easier to pretend that everything is ok and be light-hearted but then the effort of trying to pretend to be ok is suffocating and just adds to the problem so it's just a never-ending loop. . Aww lovely, i know much of what you say is so true, and it’s how you feel, but in reality, there will be people that live you dearly and will not worry about how down you are or for how long, as long as they can be your stepping stone to getting the help you need then let them help, tell them how your feeling, don’t feel guilty or worry, people around you are stronger than you think, if you need them then tell themxxx

Sending hugs, Mrs blue eyes

I don't mean to put a damper on things I understand people trying to help and I can assure you it's very much appreciated threads like this.

Oh god now I just sound negative and I guess I am sometimes everyone has a lot going on in their lives so it's easier not to bother them. "
. Awww you’re not putting a dampener on things ya dafty, you’re just saying how you feel, the realism of things for you, you’re right there will be people that just want to fix you, but this road is the longest road and the hardest, just use these people as a stepping stone until you find the help that’s right for you, you’re right mental health is so hard to understand and I don’t believe anyone will ever understand everyone and all of their feelings but someone, somewhere will be able to help you have at least some ok days and that’s a startxxx

Sending hugs, Mrs blue eyes xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible. "

Yeah, trying explain to someone why you can't get out of bed when you don't even know why yourself is bloody hard.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible. "
. I absolutely understand this, but you don’t have to explain, you just have to talk, it doesn’t have to make sense, it’s can just be words, not necessarily a sentence even, but you’re talking, who knows what my come of thatxx

Mrs blue eyesxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Yeah, trying explain to someone why you can't get out of bed when you don't even know why yourself is bloody hard. "

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By *e_jpMan over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

Great thread OP, couldn’t agree more. Definitely better to talk about your troubles, rather than bottling them up.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Yeah, trying explain to someone why you can't get out of bed when you don't even know why yourself is bloody hard. "
. This is the thing though lovely one, you don’t have to explain yourself, you just need to talk, just say it, ‘ I can’t get out of bed today, I don’t even bloody know why’ there you said it, people who are listening aren’t expecting the world, their just listeningxx

Mrs blue eyes xxx

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Yeah, trying explain to someone why you can't get out of bed when you don't even know why yourself is bloody hard.

Exactly and the other thing is people will always say "there are people worse off than you" or "things could be worse" but what they don't understand is we already know that and that adds to our feelings of hopelessness and being a burden. It's hard because they're only trying to help but it's really not helpful. "
. See you’re talking, people will read this and take note, they will hear you and it may not help you but they won’t say it to the next person, you just helped someone else, you’re telling us how you feel, you’ve found common ground with hatter, you lornajo are using us as your stepping stones, I’m listening, I’m taking notice of how you feel, it may be small things but we’re all listening lovely, Mrs blue eyes xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Yeah, trying explain to someone why you can't get out of bed when you don't even know why yourself is bloody hard.

I couldn't agree more.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What's the point when no one is prepared to listen or respond."

Who doesn’t listen when you’re in need? If you’re ever having any negative thoughts I will personally talk to anyone if it means I’ve saved a life, a family, a friend from the evil disease that is suicide.

Suicide is the single biggest killer of men aged under 45 in the UK. In 2015, 75% of all UK suicides were male. It’s a shocking statistic, but it doesn’t have to be that way.

Honestly I don’t care what people think of me I’ll laugh anything off. So why was I so silent when I went through my depression? Because when you’re depressed you feel less like a man, you get the idiots out there who think “chin up”, “cheer up” or my most hated phrase “man up” actually help but in my opinion they make it worse!

So men/women/tvs of fab this is my plea to you! If you feel you have nobody to talk to who will listen or understand. Try talking to us!

We’re here for you!

Doughnut

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Yeah, trying explain to someone why you can't get out of bed when you don't even know why yourself is bloody hard.

I couldn't agree more. "
. Hmmm, did you two just find a little understanding in each other, see always someone, just sometimes we find them where we least expect themxxx

Mrs blue eyes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Yeah, trying explain to someone why you can't get out of bed when you don't even know why yourself is bloody hard. . This is the thing though lovely one, you don’t have to explain yourself, you just need to talk, just say it, ‘ I can’t get out of bed today, I don’t even bloody know why’ there you said it, people who are listening aren’t expecting the world, their just listeningxx

Mrs blue eyes xxx"

Unfortunately most people will say something along the lines of 'you just have to get push yourself to get up'

If I could do that I wouldn't be in this mess.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

couldn't agree more talking helps as someone who suffers from depression and anxiety most people on here who know me on and off fab know how bad it got before I came to this crazy place 3 and bit years ago lol I like to be honest when I meet people on and off fab I never go into to much details as a bit personal for me and depends how long or well I know someone

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I was saddened to hear he’d died

Really affected me that it was suicide

And it’s not easy to reach out when your mind overwhelms you that much...

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Mrs blue eyes xxx

Unfortunately most people will say something along the lines of 'you just have to get push yourself to get up'

If I could do that I wouldn't be in this mess.

"
. Then you need to talk to people who understand, there will be people who know what you can’t get out of bed even when you don’t know why, you just need to find those people. You’ve started the ball rolling by talking here, but hatter, you need professional help, I’m not saying you’re going to get it over night but you have to take that step, you have to find that help, it will be there, just please, please go and look for itxxx

Mrs blue eyes xx

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"couldn't agree more talking helps as someone who suffers from depression and anxiety most people on here who know me on and off fab know how bad it got before I came to this crazy place 3 and bit years ago lol I like to be honest when I meet people on and off fab I never go into to much details as a bit personal for me and depends how long or well I know someone"
. Love this, so glad you’ve found some release here, sending positive hugs xxx

Mrs blue eyes

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"I was saddened to hear he’d died

Really affected me that it was suicide

And it’s not easy to reach out when your mind overwhelms you that much... "
. It’s not, you’re so right, just hope that this helps a little, much lovexx

Mrs blue eyes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"couldn't agree more talking helps as someone who suffers from depression and anxiety most people on here who know me on and off fab know how bad it got before I came to this crazy place 3 and bit years ago lol I like to be honest when I meet people on and off fab I never go into to much details as a bit personal for me and depends how long or well I know someone. Love this, so glad you’ve found some release here, sending positive hugs xxx

Mrs blue eyes"
thank you mrs blue eyes and no thank you for being good eye candy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Absolutely, yes.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I was saddened to hear he’d died

Really affected me that it was suicide

And it’s not easy to reach out when your mind overwhelms you that much... . It’s not, you’re so right, just hope that this helps a little, much lovexx

Mrs blue eyes "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Mrs blue eyes xxx

Unfortunately most people will say something along the lines of 'you just have to get push yourself to get up'

If I could do that I wouldn't be in this mess.

. Then you need to talk to people who understand, there will be people who know what you can’t get out of bed even when you don’t know why, you just need to find those people. You’ve started the ball rolling by talking here, but hatter, you need professional help, I’m not saying you’re going to get it over night but you have to take that step, you have to find that help, it will be there, just please, please go and look for itxxx

Mrs blue eyes xx"

Unfortunately mental health services are woeful. It took two years of assessments and appointments for them to tell me I need a therapist which I'd have to pay for. I was seeing a therapist for a while then my hours at work were reduced so I couldn't afford to see her anymore.

I'm lucky, I've got people around me. I just wish there was more help for the people who don't have anyone.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Mrs blue eyes xxx

Unfortunately most people will say something along the lines of 'you just have to get push yourself to get up'

If I could do that I wouldn't be in this mess.

Mrs blue eyes xx

I'm lucky, I've got people around me. I just wish there was more help for the people who don't have anyone. "
. That’s so harsh lovely, you need to go back and access those services again if you can, now your circumstances have changed things may be different, that road to getting help is long on the nhs, but there are many charities too, I’m glad you e got good people around you, now you need to open up to them sweetie, Mrs blue eyesxxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You're a very lovely person yourself, Mrs Blue Eyes, thanks for all your comments on here.

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By *a Fee VerteWoman over a year ago

Limbo

Thank you Mrs Blue Eyes for posting this thread

I agree that if you're lucky enough to have the safety net of a loving, supportive family and/or friends around you then yes, you absolutely should talk to them!

Unfortunately however, not everyone's in that position - I've personally found out the hard way throughout most of my adult life that people I'd have hoped were close enough to me to have cared and be interested simply haven't wanted to know and my attempts to start a conversation have therefore stalled. I've literally been hung up on, promises to call me back haven't materialised, and no further enquiry into my well being has ever been mentioned again. In that situation, however bad you feel, you're then deterred from raising similar concerns another time, because the additional hurt of being rejected when you're already very low is too much to contemplate and can exacerbate feelings of worthlessness. Paradoxically therefore, by *not* calling, you can fool yourself that if someone knew they'd be 'sympathetic'

and that's preferable to having the opposite confirmed for real

If you don't have people you can talk to in real life accessing professional help is perhaps even more important but sadly, along with most other areas of the NHS, mental health services are under huge strain and so many aren't getting the help they need. Whether or not this still holds true, and/or is dependent upon your particular health authority, my understanding, for example, is that GPs can now only refer patients for 6 sessions of NHS counselling (i.e. the much needed talking!!) - which for most would be akin to a plaster on an open wound and wholly insufficient. And given the current economic climate, many people can't afford to pursue treatment privately. Anyway, I'm digressing ...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Mrs blue eyes xxx

Unfortunately most people will say something along the lines of 'you just have to get push yourself to get up'

If I could do that I wouldn't be in this mess.

Mrs blue eyes xx

I'm lucky, I've got people around me. I just wish there was more help for the people who don't have anyone. . That’s so harsh lovely, you need to go back and access those services again if you can, now your circumstances have changed things may be different, that road to getting help is long on the nhs, but there are many charities too, I’m glad you e got good people around you, now you need to open up to them sweetie, Mrs blue eyesxxx"

Honestly, I don't want to go back through all that again. I've got my people, I'll get through and there are people out there who need the help a hell of a lot more than me.

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"Thank you Mrs Blue Eyes for posting this thread

I agree that if you're lucky enough to have the safety net of a loving, supportive family and/or friends around you then yes, you absolutely should talk to them!

and that's preferable to having the opposite confirmed for real

... I'm not altogether sure if I can be of any help to anyone who's in the mire right now but I'd certainly try and for what it's worth, the offer's there if anyone would like to message. I'm pretty unshockable and have been through 'it' myself (though fully appreciate it's an individual experience). I always felt that it was never about expecting anyone else to wave a magic wand but a few kind words and knowing someone was thinking of you would have often made all the difference. "
. Oh my goodness, many things you feel and have felt ring true with so many others in here my lovely, I send you all the love in the world just for the fact that life has been so tough and yet here you are offering that hand and heart to others, you are right the services out there are not good, they try, there are charities, but alas the help is not as it should be, I just wanted to offer that little bit of kindness to say, in that initial moment when you feel like there is no one in the world for you, please just try, not in particular family or friends, hey it could be a complete stranger, but I’m pretty sure, if people stopped and said, I need help, I feel like I may hurt myself then no one no matter who would turn their back, it’s a long road after that, and that road isn’t easy by far, but just saying those words, if you can, then well that may be your turning point.

You are so brave to come on here and bare your soul and offer to help others I am in total awe, Thankyou so much for being so lovelyxxx

Mrs blue eyes

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By *cduck and Blue eyes OP Couple over a year ago

nr chester

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Mrs blue eyes xxx

Unfortunately most people will say something along the lines of 'you just have to get push yourself to get up'

If I could do that I wouldn't be in this mess.

Mrs blue eyes xx

Honestly, I don't want to go back through all that again. I've got my people, I'll get through and there are people out there who need the help a hell of a lot more than me. "
. You take good care of yourself hatter and you use those people as often as you need, because as I said earlier, all of you are precious and there will always be someone broken hearted without you xxx much love as always, Mrs blue eyes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The other thing is sometimes you don't even understand your thoughts and feelings yourself so trying to explain them to someone else it's almost impossible.

Mrs blue eyes xxx

Unfortunately most people will say something along the lines of 'you just have to get push yourself to get up'

If I could do that I wouldn't be in this mess.

Mrs blue eyes xx

Honestly, I don't want to go back through all that again. I've got my people, I'll get through and there are people out there who need the help a hell of a lot more than me. "

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

Great Post in general to be fair and should be said regardless of news stories.

I hadn't seen that it was confirmed as suicide. If that's true that is very sad.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

Sometimes it is hard to talk.

Where do you begin where there is so much, so many years.

The feeling that people have things bigger of their own than what you might need to at a is suffocating.

People don't even know how to reply..

It's good to talk

It's even better to be heard.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My sister tried to end her life two weeks ago. In a very traumatic way. She’s now in hospital on a trauma unit and will be there for months.

I echo the talking part but sometimes you just don’t know someone’s true struggles. I was on the phone to my sister for an hour and two hours later I got a call to say she’d tried to attempt suicide.

I’m glad she’s alive but I do wonder if only I’d have known how bad she really felt I could have done more

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This is a brilliant thread full of compassion & kindness but it’s just so painful for me to read... my sincere condolences to anyone whose lost someone to suicide

Much love x

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By *eviationMan over a year ago

Brynamman

Where to begin is say hello to someone in the street

You may make someones day

Family.friends.people at work

Just chat shit it leads to other chats

Phone anyone in your phn book either random (flick and stop)or someone you've been out of contact with

Some sit alone or surrounded by people but feel alone

When the clouds gather and you feel overwhelmed TALK TO ANYONE dont act TALK

IT DOES HELP IF YOU FEEL LIKE IT AGAIN (YOU WILL MOST LIKELY)TALK

JUST TALK IT GIVES PERSPECTIVE TO YOUR PROBLEM AND KEEPS YOU GOING

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By *orbidden eastMan over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

"I agree with everything in the OP. Heartbreaking to see Liam Howletts response of “I’m shell shocked, fuckin angry, confused and heart broken...”.

10 years on and I still feel those emotions. Those that are left behind need support too and there are lots of organisations including CRUSE that can help.

How ads aunt and uncle cope I have no clue but they are a bloody inspiration.

Very true should never be scared to ask for help and I know it’s easier said than done but with time it will get easier. But in the long term it will make you stronger and like me I just tried to be more happier just in someway makes you appreciate life a little bit more and more importantly the small things that we miss all the time

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"My sister tried to end her life two weeks ago. In a very traumatic way. She’s now in hospital on a trauma unit and will be there for months.

I’m glad she’s alive but I do wonder if only I’d have known how bad she really felt I could have done more

I am so sorry and I very much hope that your sister makes a full recovery and gets the support she needs.

I know this is easy for me to say but please don't beat yourself up about not being able to help her.

Sometimes the feelings are so desperate and so overwhelming but you genuinely believe the people around you are better off without you and that you are only hurting them.

You can only help somebody but wants to be helped and I know that's hard truth but it's an important one.

I really hope things get a lot better very soon. X

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By *ficouldMan over a year ago

a quandary, could you change my mind?

We're all walking around with these glossy eyes.

"I am just tired", we say.

But you know what? It's bullshit.

Yes, we are tired, but it's not all from lack of sleep.

We are tired of waking up with nothing to look forward to,

tired of going to bed exhausted after doing a million things we find no enjoyment in doing.

We are tired of this void, this emptiness that looms over us even though we're surrounded by dozens of people.

So why can't we just say it?

Humans are so afraid to look into each others eyes and say: "I am unhappy, I am broken, I am hopeless and fallible."

We've been conditioned to associate pain with weakness, sadness with coldness, loneliness with unworthiness, difference with disease,

as if these feelings are contagious, as if ambivalence is something not be felt but to be feared.

Well, i say screw it all of that.

Screw forced smiles and polite handshakes and "I am fine, thank yous" .

Screw the fear of crying in a public place, screw the fake chipper voice, screw the lies we spit out to cover up our problems.

We are humans.

We are ment to feel.

To feel everything and to feel it openly. We are not metal - we are flesh and bone.

Our boiled blood courses through our cold, clammy hands. We are intricate and beautiful and we should never hide our human part, because if we do, then

what's left to show?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My friend killed himself. PTSD and Depression. None of us knew, if we had, we'd have stood by him, no matter what. He never told anyone. Just manned up and bottled up. Another name on a war memorial.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"My friend killed himself. PTSD and Depression. None of us knew, if we had, we'd have stood by him, no matter what. He never told anyone. Just manned up and bottled up. Another name on a war memorial. "

Well.. not even that.

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By *orbidden eastMan over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

"My sister tried to end her life two weeks ago. In a very traumatic way. She’s now in hospital on a trauma unit and will be there for months.

I’m glad she’s alive but I do wonder if only I’d have known how bad she really felt I could have done more

I am so sorry and I very much hope that your sister makes a full recovery and gets the support she needs.

I know this is easy for me to say but please don't beat yourself up about not being able to help her.

Sometimes the feelings are so desperate and so overwhelming but you genuinely believe the people around you are better off without you and that you are only hurting them.

You can only help somebody but wants to be helped and I know that's hard truth but it's an important one.

I really hope things get a lot better very soon.

Very true indeed I’ve been in a similar situation this could be a wake-up call for her just give her time and be there for her. That’s all you can do and just remember take it step-by-step each day as it comes because if you don’t you be to you overwhelming you and your sister will be okay just give it time

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By *om and JennieCouple over a year ago

Chams or Socials

"As someone who has lost someone through suicide I echo your post 100%."

Snap. Our mental health services are so disgustingly underfunded - please talk to anyone who will listen xx

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By *picknspanMan over a year ago

North West Leeds

As a man I reserve the right to bottle up any feelings, thoughts or ideas that I have. I would not share them with someone I barely know or anyone else who may think or feel that they have a better idea of what I could, should or can do in my situation.

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"As a man I reserve the right to bottle up any feelings, thoughts or ideas that I have. I would not share them with someone I barely know or anyone else who may think or feel that they have a better idea of what I could, should or can do in my situation.

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it."

This kind of comment is exactly the problem!!!

so you are suggesting that somebody that has mental health problems is not strong and too weak that is ridiculous and not helpful.

Everybody else been able to be positive this is a serious issue and should be taken as such!

Anybody reading this thread who is struggling please ignore this kind of thing and reach out

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By *picknspanMan over a year ago

North West Leeds

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

This kind of comment is exactly the problem!!!

so you are suggesting that somebody that has mental health problems is not strong and too weak that is ridiculous and not helpful.

Everybody else been able to be positive this is a serious issue and should be taken as such!

Anybody reading this thread who is struggling please ignore this kind of thing and reach out

Forums are about opinions not bleating the same as previous sheep!

I choose to do things MY way because I can. I have not suggested that anyone else should....try to be understanding that when something is said it is not obligatory to be contrite and agree.

Other views are available other than yours!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

This kind of comment is exactly the problem!!!

so you are suggesting that somebody that has mental health problems is not strong and too weak that is ridiculous and not helpful.

Everybody else been able to be positive this is a serious issue and should be taken as such!

Anybody reading this thread who is struggling please ignore this kind of thing and reach out

Forums are about opinions not bleating the same as previous sheep!

I choose to do things MY way because I can. I have not suggested that anyone else should....try to be understanding that when something is said it is not obligatory to be contrite and agree.

Other views are available other than yours!!"

This was a thread aimed at supporting people there was no need for what you have just written.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

This kind of comment is exactly the problem!!!

so you are suggesting that somebody that has mental health problems is not strong and too weak that is ridiculous and not helpful.

Everybody else been able to be positive this is a serious issue and should be taken as such!

Anybody reading this thread who is struggling please ignore this kind of thing and reach out

Forums are about opinions not bleating the same as previous sheep!

I choose to do things MY way because I can. I have not suggested that anyone else should....try to be understanding that when something is said it is not obligatory to be contrite and agree.

Other views are available other than yours!!"

It's not what you said it's the way you said it... you didn't need to say it really!? This is about support and making people aware that it's ok to talk about your feelings. Your comment just makes vulnerable people think they must be weak to feel that way or there is something wrong with feeling that way...

Good for you that you have found a way of dealing with life but unfortunately we are all wired differently. Mental health is an illness not a problem. There is plenty of help out there for anyone seeking it and it is not weak.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it."

I have read some shit on this forum but think this tops it all.

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By *picknspanMan over a year ago

North West Leeds

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

This kind of comment is exactly the problem!!!

so you are suggesting that somebody that has mental health problems is not strong and too weak that is ridiculous and not helpful.

Everybody else been able to be positive this is a serious issue and should be taken as such!

Anybody reading this thread who is struggling please ignore this kind of thing and reach out

Forums are about opinions not bleating the same as previous sheep!

I choose to do things MY way because I can. I have not suggested that anyone else should....try to be understanding that when something is said it is not obligatory to be contrite and agree.

Other views are available other than yours!!

This was a thread aimed at supporting people there was no need for what you have just written.

In other words "you didn't have the same opinion as me! How dare you?"

Pathetic!

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By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it."

You are not alone in this feeling, not at all.

And if that is what works for you obviously that is great. Different things work for others, I guess it all about how you make sure that things don't eat you up slowly in the future.

It is really good if you can self regulate any negative feelings, though I don't think it it necessarily 'your right as a man' as that is a somewhat Neanderthal like saying. "Men need to be strong and brave and not show emotion"

Some women take this stance, some men wear their heart on their sleeve.

Individual people should seek out ways to help them deal with tough times

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/03/19 21:30:34]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it."

Luckily for you you can do that. Maybe you're not as affected by it as others.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm lucky, I've got people around me. I just wish there was more help for the people who don't have anyone. "

Have you asked if there is a counselling service that will take a lower fee? I know there’s one in my county that never turn anyone away for financial reasons. Or even your original counsellor would she take less? I used to see a counsellor and she accepted what I could afford at that time. It might be worth asking.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it."

All of this couldn’t be more wrong, this isn’t helping anyone.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it."

Playing devils advocate, I understand what he’s getting at... but it’s worded so wrong I see why everyone is pissed.

I take way too much of everyone on board and it can be overwhelming and draining yet I still do it as I’m just that type of soul that likes to help.

The only reason I’m independent and try not to burden is because no one is around when I need them to be so I just go it alone but fucking hell, sometimes I could kill for someone to just sit there... don’t even have to talk! Just sit there, with me.

I asked, they said no so fuck it. I rely on me BUT in no way would I suggest that no one reach out or someone is weak for needing help.

Maybe deep down that’s why I escape here so I’m not completely isolated, fuck knows but the couple of people that have genuinely given a shit have really helped make this a very very positive experience.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

All of this couldn’t be more wrong, this isn’t helping anyone. "

I think them this might be the first and only time I never agreed with anything you have said

(every cloud)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

I have read some shit on this forum but think this tops it all."

Just worded very negatively, I actually get it once I picked it apart

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

All of this couldn’t be more wrong, this isn’t helping anyone. "

Totally agree on the face of it just very poorly articulated

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

All of this couldn’t be more wrong, this isn’t helping anyone.

Totally agree on the face of it just very poorly articulated "

Having clinical depression isn't about allowing anything.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I often start long threads from the bottom up, wish I hadn't...

Have a lot to say on this topic on a personal and a professional level but given how this thread has gone not sure I want too now.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

All of this couldn’t be more wrong, this isn’t helping anyone.

Totally agree on the face of it just very poorly articulated

Having clinical depression isn't about allowing anything. "

I meant I agreed with tame impala

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

Luckily for you you can do that. Maybe you're not as affected by it as others."

Thats a good point...

There is no measure. It’s not a competition x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I often start long threads from the bottom up, wish I hadn't...

Have a lot to say on this topic on a personal and a professional level but given how this thread has gone not sure I want too now."

It started lovely as well was almost restorative to my faith in humanity

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it."

Wow, I'm sorry you feel this way.

I am a true friend, and I'd be deeply saddened if someone I care for (or even someone I barely knew) didn't come to me if they needed me. It's called caring.

It's not a burden, it's actually a motherfucking privilege that you're trusted enough for someone to be open about their darkest times/feelings with you.

Man/woman/child/war veteran/abuse victim/anyone and everyone should feel important enough to be heard, felt and cared for.

I don't want to discuss this with you, as I find your views rather disturbing, however I respect that's your view, and wish you every success in your personal quest for heartlessness and martyrdom

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

Playing devils advocate, I understand what he’s getting at... but it’s worded so wrong I see why everyone is pissed.

I take way too much of everyone on board and it can be overwhelming and draining yet I still do it as I’m just that type of soul that likes to help.

I asked, they said no so fuck it. I rely on me BUT in no way would I suggest that no one reach out or someone is weak for needing help.

A true friend would want to be someone their friends look to to talk.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

Playing devils advocate, I understand what he’s getting at... but it’s worded so wrong I see why everyone is pissed.

I take way too much of everyone on board and it can be overwhelming and draining yet I still do it as I’m just that type of soul that likes to help.

I asked, they said no so fuck it. I rely on me BUT in no way would I suggest that no one reach out or someone is weak for needing help.

A true friend would want to be someone their friends look to to talk."

Exactly that’s why I said I do it as I’m that friend

Yet when I need it I see tumbles floating past

So I keep myself to myself now

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it."

If any of what you said were true then I wouldn't be here today.

I pray that you never see the darkest days of depression. But if you do, that a hand reaches out and saves you from your isolation.

Until then have whatever views you like but don't ever judge another who's pain you don't understand.

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By *picknspanMan over a year ago

North West Leeds

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

All of this couldn’t be more wrong, this isn’t helping anyone. "

How can you say my opinion is wrong?! I said of me, I spoke for me! I did say you or anyone else! I have my view of me!! And you have the nerve or the belief that you can say I'm wrong talking about me?

That has to be as a bigoted and as 'up your own arse' as it gets!

Shame on you!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A friend of mine hung himself and I found him. He had many people to talk to but it seemed like he believed that was the only way out.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A friend of mine hung himself and I found him. He had many people to talk to but it seemed like he believed that was the only way out. "

Without going into too much detail: that belief your friend held... I completely understand that

My sincere condolences x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it."

No man is an island entire of himself

John Dunne wrote that over 200 years ago.

So just a thought if we do not share with others, show no compassion for others, have no empathy for others, then where will they ever be when we fall off that island and discover that without others our lives are diminished greatly....

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Don't attack people just because their views differ from you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do mot show signs of weakness or pressure nor do I allow depression or despair to cloud what I do or how I view what needs to be done.

I do not rely on other people and refuse to burden them with any issues that only I alone can arbitrate or adjust.

A true friend should never pass on their concerns so that they are now ravaging another person as well.

Be strong, be solid and become stronger and less dependent....that's how I see it.

All of this couldn’t be more wrong, this isn’t helping anyone.

That has to be as a bigoted and as 'up your own arse' as it gets!

Shame on you!!!!"

Shame on me for wanting people to open up about their mental health problems and not go back to the recent past where people bottled It up so much they could only see one way out. I want mental health to be talked about in the same way physical health problems are. I want it To be out in the open so we can finally get rid of any stigma and taboo surrounding anxiety and depression.

Yes, shame on me!

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By *r.BlondeMan over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

OK this thread is getting more personal in stories that are not really allowed on the forum

As much as it is good to support each other for lots of things there are probably better suited sites for help like this where vulnerable people will not be taken advantage of so I am going to shut this now.

If people want to swop other site names in mail you will probably help those people more

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