FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Are you 'out'? Do people know your sexuality?
Are you 'out'? Do people know your sexuality?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Question for people of all sexualities- even heterosexual.
Does everyone know your sexuality? Friends, family, neighbours, people at the supermarket etc.
If not, why not?
If you are straight, have you come out to your family and admitted you are only attracted to the opposite sex? |
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"I’m your common or garden straight type who has kissed women in the past and had a little fondle but yes most definitely straight "
P.s. everyone knows I only have sex with men apart from the lady kissing stuff |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As me and my wife been together since we were teenagers have two daughters think it should be pretty obvious we are straight. The fact we recently started swinging is not something I would discuss with my 80 year old parents but our daughter has very strong suspicions we aren’t vanilla |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
Nice thread OP!
The societal assumption of people's default setting is straight. Personally I'd rather not make assumptions about something like that, it makes no difference to me.
I think the whole 'coming out' is a bit unnecessary to be honest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some family, close friends and some work colleagues. If people ask me, I tell the truth. I tend not to discuss my sex life with most people, so it doesn't really come up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really hope that when my children become of age where sexuality is a thing that they don’t have to “come out”. That bringing home a same sex partner is just as normal as an opposite sex partner."
That's lovely |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I really hope that when my children become of age where sexuality is a thing that they don’t have to “come out”. That bringing home a same sex partner is just as normal as an opposite sex partner."
That's exactly how I feel.
I teach them acceptance of others and of themselves, that I love them for who they are. Trying to explain to them what coming out is, is a very difficult thing. I would have to explain people's assumptions and that acceptance isn't something that everyone has. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some of My friends know that I fancy women, my family would be mortified, my sister wouldn’t speak to me ever again (if my family knew I was on a site like this I doubt my parents would ever contact me again tbh), my ex husband jokes to my kids all women are lesbian or bi sexual so they kind of know but I’ve never openly said to them.
Danish x |
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"I really hope that when my children become of age where sexuality is a thing that they don’t have to “come out”. That bringing home a same sex partner is just as normal as an opposite sex partner.
That's exactly how I feel.
I teach them acceptance of others and of themselves, that I love them for who they are. Trying to explain to them what coming out is, is a very difficult thing. I would have to explain people's assumptions and that acceptance isn't something that everyone has. "
That’s the part I worry about, explaining other people’s assumptions and acceptance. We had a conversation after Valentine’s Day where my son wanted to send a valentines to a girl and a boy, he was 6. Instantly I said he can send to both but then I had this worry that others might not be so accepting and be a cause for bullying, especially as one dad has told him to man up, stop looking like a girl etc.
In the ideal world, and I hope it’ll be a thing where people can love whoever they wish without worry
* steps off soapbox * |
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I've never had to declare my sexuality to friends or family. They've only ever been introduced to 2 men I was in relationships with, so I'd imagine they assume I'm straight. It's not really a question that comes up in conversation... Pass the peas please, oh, and by the way would you fuck a woman? |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I really hope that when my children become of age where sexuality is a thing that they don’t have to “come out”. That bringing home a same sex partner is just as normal as an opposite sex partner.
That's exactly how I feel.
I teach them acceptance of others and of themselves, that I love them for who they are. Trying to explain to them what coming out is, is a very difficult thing. I would have to explain people's assumptions and that acceptance isn't something that everyone has.
That’s the part I worry about, explaining other people’s assumptions and acceptance. We had a conversation after Valentine’s Day where my son wanted to send a valentines to a girl and a boy, he was 6. Instantly I said he can send to both but then I had this worry that others might not be so accepting and be a cause for bullying, especially as one dad has told him to man up, stop looking like a girl etc.
In the ideal world, and I hope it’ll be a thing where people can love whoever they wish without worry
* steps off soapbox *"
Hang on, a dad of another child told your 6 year old to 'man up and stop looking like a girl'? |
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"I really hope that when my children become of age where sexuality is a thing that they don’t have to “come out”. That bringing home a same sex partner is just as normal as an opposite sex partner.
That's exactly how I feel.
I teach them acceptance of others and of themselves, that I love them for who they are. Trying to explain to them what coming out is, is a very difficult thing. I would have to explain people's assumptions and that acceptance isn't something that everyone has.
That’s the part I worry about, explaining other people’s assumptions and acceptance. We had a conversation after Valentine’s Day where my son wanted to send a valentines to a girl and a boy, he was 6. Instantly I said he can send to both but then I had this worry that others might not be so accepting and be a cause for bullying, especially as one dad has told him to man up, stop looking like a girl etc.
In the ideal world, and I hope it’ll be a thing where people can love whoever they wish without worry
* steps off soapbox *
Hang on, a dad of another child told your 6 year old to 'man up and stop looking like a girl'? "
Sadly yes, I’ve discussed it with his wife, she’s had words. Although there is absolutely no excuse but she explains that he’s surrounded by these opinions at work. I hope his son doesn’t have the same thoughts. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If a guy sucks another guys dick and doesn't like it,is he gay? Tried it didn't like it,prefer women,is he still classed as curious or gay?
Asking for my mate Jeff |
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Everyone assumes I'm straight, they're correct but I've never come out to them.
Everyone assumed my youngest brother was gay and they were wrong. He didn't come out as straight, they just assumed he was when he married a woman. For all anybody knows both of us could be bisexual or gay. I don't think it matters or is anybody elses business but other people do. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I really hope that when my children become of age where sexuality is a thing that they don’t have to “come out”. That bringing home a same sex partner is just as normal as an opposite sex partner.
That's exactly how I feel.
I teach them acceptance of others and of themselves, that I love them for who they are. Trying to explain to them what coming out is, is a very difficult thing. I would have to explain people's assumptions and that acceptance isn't something that everyone has.
That’s the part I worry about, explaining other people’s assumptions and acceptance. We had a conversation after Valentine’s Day where my son wanted to send a valentines to a girl and a boy, he was 6. Instantly I said he can send to both but then I had this worry that others might not be so accepting and be a cause for bullying, especially as one dad has told him to man up, stop looking like a girl etc.
In the ideal world, and I hope it’ll be a thing where people can love whoever they wish without worry
* steps off soapbox *
Hang on, a dad of another child told your 6 year old to 'man up and stop looking like a girl'?
Sadly yes, I’ve discussed it with his wife, she’s had words. Although there is absolutely no excuse but she explains that he’s surrounded by these opinions at work. I hope his son doesn’t have the same thoughts."
There's never an excuse for that sort of behaviour to my mind. I don't think that I would've left it to his wife to have a "quiet word" either. Anyone imposing that kind of view with my kids would get a very direct word |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My dad once called me a pussy and I said ‘you are what you eat’. He laughed so much he spat his drink everywhere, called my mum over and told her.
She asked me to confirm and I said yep, bi. She handed my dad a fiver - she was convinced I was a lesbian but my dad knew I was bi. My mum said ‘we knew you were at least a little bit gay’
Then I got a girlfriend in high school so I never needed to come out to anyone else |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Nice thread OP!
The societal assumption of people's default setting is straight. Personally I'd rather not make assumptions about something like that, it makes no difference to me.
I think the whole 'coming out' is a bit unnecessary to be honest. "
I don't like that 'coming out' is still a thing. Sexuality is irrelevant to the majority of our friends and family etc.
Straight people don't have to 'admit' to it. (It's always phrased "s/he *admits* they are gay", like it's a bad thing.) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Question for people of all sexualities- even heterosexual.
Does everyone know your sexuality? Friends, family, neighbours, people at the supermarket etc.
If not, why not?
If you are straight, have you come out to your family and admitted you are only attracted to the opposite sex?"
My sister knows I'm bi and the only reason I told her is when my niece came out a few weeks ago. Didn't faze her on bit. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I really hope that when my children become of age where sexuality is a thing that they don’t have to “come out”. That bringing home a same sex partner is just as normal as an opposite sex partner.
That's exactly how I feel.
I teach them acceptance of others and of themselves, that I love them for who they are. Trying to explain to them what coming out is, is a very difficult thing. I would have to explain people's assumptions and that acceptance isn't something that everyone has.
That’s the part I worry about, explaining other people’s assumptions and acceptance. We had a conversation after Valentine’s Day where my son wanted to send a valentines to a girl and a boy, he was 6. Instantly I said he can send to both but then I had this worry that others might not be so accepting and be a cause for bullying, especially as one dad has told him to man up, stop looking like a girl etc.
In the ideal world, and I hope it’ll be a thing where people can love whoever they wish without worry
* steps off soapbox *"
I agree. I think you're right to be wary too, unfortunately. He'd get teased. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If a guy sucks another guys dick and doesn't like it,is he gay? Tried it didn't like it,prefer women,is he still classed as curious or gay?
Asking for my mate Jeff "
How long was he sucking the cock for before he decided he didn't like it? Minutes, hours, weeks? Was he wearing a black leather cap with chains on, a big bushy tache and humming "It's raining men"? |
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By *ficouldMan
over a year ago
a quandary, could you change my mind? |
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If you are straight, have you come out to your family and admitted you are only attracted to the opposite sex?"
For some reason this question had come up numerous times with a Fabber, I really don't know why I would have to keep re-confirming that I am a heterosexual. |
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My sex life is entirely restricted to fab - I prefer it that way!
Anyone on fab can check out my profile and verifications - and deduce that I play mostly with men but occasionally with women!
As I don’t shag anyone in the real world - they don’t need to know! I don’t discuss my conquests to anyone outside fab - Male or female!
If I ever have another relationship it’ll be with a Male - so again those outside fab don’t need to know anything else! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My sex life is entirely restricted to fab - I prefer it that way!
Anyone on fab can check out my profile and verifications - and deduce that I play mostly with men but occasionally with women!
As I don’t shag anyone in the real world - they don’t need to know! I don’t discuss my conquests to anyone outside fab - Male or female!
If I ever have another relationship it’ll be with a Male - so again those outside fab don’t need to know anything else! "
Basically this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If a guy sucks another guys dick and doesn't like it,is he gay? Tried it didn't like it,prefer women,is he still classed as curious or gay?
Asking for my mate Jeff " m
What about if he just sucked a cock to see if he could get a tune out of it, cause someone once told him he could play ‘Celebration’ on his and he needed to see for himself ?!
Also asking for Dash’s mate Jeff. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If a guy sucks another guys dick and doesn't like it,is he gay? Tried it didn't like it,prefer women,is he still classed as curious or gay?
Asking for my mate Jeff m
What about if he just sucked a cock to see if he could get a tune out of it, cause someone once told him he could play ‘Celebration’ on his and he needed to see for himself ?!
Also asking for Dash’s mate Jeff."
I think Jeff is imaginary |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, only a few trusted friends.
My family are homophobic, against sites like this, and some of people I know could never be trusted to keep my private life private.
I don’t ask anyone else who they slept with, when and how etc, none of my business, so don’t think they need to know about my sex life either xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My dad once called me a pussy and I said ‘you are what you eat’. He laughed so much he spat his drink everywhere, called my mum over and told her.
She asked me to confirm and I said yep, bi. She handed my dad a fiver - she was convinced I was a lesbian but my dad knew I was bi. My mum said ‘we knew you were at least a little bit gay’
Then I got a girlfriend in high school so I never needed to come out to anyone else "
I like that story |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My dad once called me a pussy and I said ‘you are what you eat’. He laughed so much he spat his drink everywhere, called my mum over and told her.
She asked me to confirm and I said yep, bi. She handed my dad a fiver - she was convinced I was a lesbian but my dad knew I was bi. My mum said ‘we knew you were at least a little bit gay’
Then I got a girlfriend in high school so I never needed to come out to anyone else
I like that story "
Made me smile too! |
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