FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > telling my wife I'm bi
telling my wife I'm bi
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
want to tell her but don't know how to bring it up and he I should or not
Any advice from men that have told there wife's would be amazing as it's messing with my head
many thanks Dan |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Show her your fab profile 
Being serious now but just ask her if she’s ever fancied a woman etc then she might ask you if you’ve ever fancied a man. You can then say you have in the past.
Good luck |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ruebameMan
over a year ago
from the womb and tryout to get back |
"want to tell her but don't know how to bring it up and he I should or not
Any advice from men that have told there wife's would be amazing as it's messing with my head
many thanks Dan"
Not bi but why not get in the closet then shout of her say you have something to tell her then come out as she walks in the room  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"want to tell her but don't know how to bring it up and he I should or not
Any advice from men that have told there wife's would be amazing as it's messing with my head
many thanks Dan"
Are you hoping to involve her? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I did it. It was very emotional but worked out fine. It says a lot more about her than about me. I’d just been too much of a coward to do it sooner."
Have you told her about your activity on here? I'm a bi dude in a committed relationship myself, so I understand your situation - but that's an equally important thing to be honest with your partner about. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
all she knows is I have a much higher sex drive then her.
she knows I like anal play and have made comments before while playing saying I wonder what it would be liked to get fucked.
have told her I am open to trying anything new.
she just smiles and acts like nothing has been said.
I would like to get her to join in and come and play.
when she is in the mood for sex she is horny as fuck.
att I just don't know hope would feel about me being bi |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I did it. It was very emotional but worked out fine. It says a lot more about her than about me. I’d just been too much of a coward to do it sooner.
Have you told her about your activity on here? I'm a bi dude in a committed relationship myself, so I understand your situation - but that's an equally important thing to be honest with your partner about."
We are still in conversation about this. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"all she knows is I have a much higher sex drive then her.
she knows I like anal play and have made comments before while playing saying I wonder what it would be liked to get fucked.
have told her I am open to trying anything new.
she just smiles and acts like nothing has been said.
I would like to get her to join in and come and play.
when she is in the mood for sex she is horny as fuck.
att I just don't know hope would feel about me being bi "
I explained it by telling her some of my sexual history that she didn’t know. It was part of a much broader conversation and deeply emotional and cathartic for both of us. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"want to tell her but don't know how to bring it up and he I should or not
Any advice from men that have told there wife's would be amazing as it's messing with my head
many thanks Dan
Not bi but why not get in the closet then shout of her say you have something to tell her then come out as she walks in the room "
Good idea  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"all she knows is I have a much higher sex drive then her.
she knows I like anal play and have made comments before while playing saying I wonder what it would be liked to get fucked.
have told her I am open to trying anything new.
she just smiles and acts like nothing has been said.
I would like to get her to join in and come and play.
when she is in the mood for sex she is horny as fuck.
att I just don't know hope would feel about me being bi
I explained it by telling her some of my sexual history that she didn’t know. It was part of a much broader conversation and deeply emotional and cathartic for both of us."
Wow, I hope you get through this and thanks for sharing |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"want to tell her but don't know how to bring it up and he I should or not
Any advice from men that have told there wife's would be amazing as it's messing with my head
many thanks Dan"
Dude. Firstly, good luck. I don't envy you. Secondly, be honest and tell your wife. She has a right to know. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"all she knows is I have a much higher sex drive then her.
she knows I like anal play and have made comments before while playing saying I wonder what it would be liked to get fucked.
have told her I am open to trying anything new.
she just smiles and acts like nothing has been said.
I would like to get her to join in and come and play.
when she is in the mood for sex she is horny as fuck.
att I just don't know hope would feel about me being bi
I explained it by telling her some of my sexual history that she didn’t know. It was part of a much broader conversation and deeply emotional and cathartic for both of us.
Wow, I hope you get through this and thanks for sharing "
We are making very good progress- thanks  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
My ex Mrs was cool about it, but we grew apart as opposed to closer together, much of it because once I found my wings I wanted to fly and not be tied to any nest
Tell her though, it's the right thing to do, whatever the outcome
At the moment, she is the thing that is stopping you being you and that's not fair on either of you |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"all she knows is I have a much higher sex drive then her.
she knows I like anal play and have made comments before while playing saying I wonder what it would be liked to get fucked.
have told her I am open to trying anything new.
she just smiles and acts like nothing has been said.
I would like to get her to join in and come and play.
when she is in the mood for sex she is horny as fuck.
att I just don't know hope would feel about me being bi "
I want to preface this by saying that the closet is a shitty place to be, and I sincerely hope you figure out a way to share your whole self with the people you care about.
However: while your sexual orientation is your business and yours alone, your sexual activity outside of the relationship is her business too. I appreciate that it'll be a really difficult thing to work through, and she may well feel more strongly about the infidelity than your orientation - she may decide to end the relationship over it.
But no good can possibly come of trying to "get her into" a scene where you've already been fucking around without her knowledge. It's not just disrespectful and building a lie into the foundation of your relationship; it's likely to feel like an even deeper betrayal for her when she eventually puts two and two together. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"My ex Mrs was cool about it, but we grew apart as opposed to closer together, much of it because once I found my wings I wanted to fly and not be tied to any nest
Tell her though, it's the right thing to do, whatever the outcome
At the moment, she is the thing that is stopping you being you and that's not fair on either of you"
This is true however it might not be her stopping him from being himself it may be his own fear and shame. That’s what it was for me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hide the frying pans and kitchen knives first
You are so thoughtless Colgate. A lot more damage can be done with a whisk or grater.
Men!
grater  "
Wincing as i read! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"all she knows is I have a much higher sex drive then her.
she knows I like anal play and have made comments before while playing saying I wonder what it would be liked to get fucked.
have told her I am open to trying anything new.
she just smiles and acts like nothing has been said.
I would like to get her to join in and come and play.
when she is in the mood for sex she is horny as fuck.
att I just don't know hope would feel about me being bi "
How long have you been married? Does she have any bi or gay men friends? How would you feel if she outed you to all your friends and family? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
OP, can imagine this is difficult. I think it could make her feel insecure as she may not be enough for you. Need to give her a lot of reassurance and think about why you are telling her. Do you want it to lead to more? To explore? Obviously honesty is the best policy, but may be tough and I guess you can't live a lie.
Best of luck. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
How long have you been married? Does she have any bi or gay men friends? How would you feel if she outed you to all your friends and family?
been married 7 years
she doesn't have any gay or bi friends
I would feel awful if she outed me
but I feel I need to tell her as I can't keep hiding it from her.
I would like her to understand |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"want to tell her but don't know how to bring it up and he I should or not
Any advice from men that have told there wife's would be amazing as it's messing with my head
many thanks Dan"
Take the easy route, get your boyfriend to tell her.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
