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Viking Jarl

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I've just won a National lottery grant to create a Viking Village here in the UK. Who wants to move in? Pets and children friendly. So any adult antics must have their appropriate places.

Picture the scene.. Quiet little Nordic village, perched in a quiet fjord. Fields of crops, berries, fruit, fish, roots, woodland and high plains. Living as they did.. If you're of age, you'd be expected to fight to protect it.

I'm totally lying, this is completely fictional and I just want to play. Fortunately that means everyone can join in. Not just 7ft Hairy Adonis's and Amazonian Blondes.

Who's in? What role do you want? I'm Jarl and I'll 'Blood Eagle' Anyone who challenges me.. That or get your own lotto fund.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Can just kiss lots of people ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Can just kiss lots of people ?"

ONLY if you pull your weight

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Can just kiss lots of people ?

ONLY if you pull your weight "

Yea , I’m pretty fucking huge

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Can just kiss lots of people ?

ONLY if you pull your weight

Yea , I’m pretty fucking huge "

I meant work wise! So far it's just you and I and I'm lazy. Will you do your fair share? If so, you can kiss me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I've just won a National lottery grant to create a Viking Village here in the UK. Who wants to move in? Pets and children friendly. So any adult antics must have their appropriate places.

Picture the scene.. Quiet little Nordic village, perched in a quiet fjord. Fields of crops, berries, fruit, fish, roots, woodland and high plains. Living as they did.. If you're of age, you'd be expected to fight to protect it.

I'm totally lying, this is completely fictional and I just want to play. Fortunately that means everyone can join in. Not just 7ft Hairy Adonis's and Amazonian Blondes.

Who's in? What role do you want? I'm Jarl and I'll 'Blood Eagle' Anyone who challenges me.. That or get your own lotto fund.

"

I have no skills so I'll just have to shag you

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Right.. I've got a kisser and a shagger. I'm having to come up with three mouths to feed.. on my Jack Jones. This is going to be a tough winter.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I can cook and be the resident hedgewitch, I'm also not bad at archery and can throw an axe or 2

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I can cook and be the resident hedgewitch, I'm also not bad at archery and can throw an axe or 2 "

Thank Odin! You and me need to go hunting. Otherwise we'll all starve. Well met.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

scratch that.. you've got a bow. You hunt. I'll get a shelter and fire going.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I can chop icebergs up into little cubes to grace the cocktails.

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By *abrielle247Couple (FF)  over a year ago

PDI Gran Canaria

Are Amozonian blondes totally ruled out.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I can chop icebergs up into little cubes to grace the cocktails. "

I like it.. for now we've more pressing concerns as there aren't many of us yet.

Ice queen?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Are Amozonian blondes totally ruled out. "

Not at all! Everyone is most welcome I'm sure you are lots of fun, but what skill are you bringing. We've a kisser, a shagger, a rather handy Jack of all trades and an ice queen. A very laid back Jarl who wants to do as little work as possible.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I can chop icebergs up into little cubes to grace the cocktails.

I like it.. for now we've more pressing concerns as there aren't many of us yet.

Ice queen?"

Seems apt, Ok then Im good at shack building too

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I m in if you ll have me, skilled with weaponry, pRticularly blades, am a backwoidsman so can do must stuff and have no problem tgrowing persons over shoulder n running off with em

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Hmmmm..... I have very pale skin which according to Viking heirachy means I don’t work so I’ll need to be Jarl upwards, possibly Queen...?

I can organise the Village’s daily life...

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By *abrielle247Couple (FF)  over a year ago

PDI Gran Canaria


"Are Amozonian blondes totally ruled out.

Not at all! Everyone is most welcome I'm sure you are lots of fun, but what skill are you bringing. We've a kisser, a shagger, a rather handy Jack of all trades and an ice queen. A very laid back Jarl who wants to do as little work as possible."

I can cook , bake and prance around looking gorgeous.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I can chop icebergs up into little cubes to grace the cocktails.

I like it.. for now we've more pressing concerns as there aren't many of us yet.

Ice queen?

Seems apt, Ok then Im good at shack building too"

Shack up with an ice queen. Sounds a bit chilly, but don't mind if I do

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I m in if you ll have me, skilled with weaponry, pRticularly blades, am a backwoidsman so can do must stuff and have no problem tgrowing persons over shoulder n running off with em "

You're in! Well met Viking man.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Hmmmm..... I have very pale skin which according to Viking heirachy means I don’t work so I’ll need to be Jarl upwards, possibly Queen...?

I can organise the Village’s daily life... "

I am quite tanned.. no I don't like it.. my game.. my rules lol.. You can be in Wise Council. They dint do a lot

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I can design and make clothes and pretty good with metal work. Although the risk is that all the guys have really embellished armour, and the women will look like burlesque or alt queens.

Used to grow my own veg, love getting down and dirty.

Also good with woodwork...this is actually true, lol, I love to make things, and as an ex nurse good with splinters too.

Can I join? xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Are Amozonian blondes totally ruled out.

Not at all! Everyone is most welcome I'm sure you are lots of fun, but what skill are you bringing. We've a kisser, a shagger, a rather handy Jack of all trades and an ice queen. A very laid back Jarl who wants to do as little work as possible.

I can cook , bake and prance around looking gorgeous. "

You are now the official bakery prancer I like a morning croissant.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I can design and make clothes and pretty good with metal work. Although the risk is that all the guys have really embellished armour, and the women will look like burlesque or alt queens.

Used to grow my own veg, love getting down and dirty.

Also good with woodwork...this is actually true, lol, I love to make things, and as an ex nurse good with splinters too.

Can I join? xx"

Yes.. camp us up into sexy Vikings please. The sexier and more personalised the touches on each garment.. the better

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By *rygveMan  over a year ago

The Shires

Sounds like my kind of village.

I’ll bring my hunter gatherer skills and my axes. Give me a deer and I’ll feed the table and keep a feisty maiden warm for the night.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hmmmm..... I have very pale skin which according to Viking heirachy means I don’t work so I’ll need to be Jarl upwards, possibly Queen...?

I can organise the Village’s daily life...

I am quite tanned.. no I don't like it.. my game.. my rules lol.. You can be in Wise Council. They dint do a lot "

My first job in Wise Council will be to appoint a new Jarl.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Sounds like my kind of village.

I’ll bring my hunter gatherer skills and my axes. Give me a deer and I’ll feed the table and keep a feisty maiden warm for the night. "

I could do with a good Viking banquet in a Smokey longhouse. Buxom feisty shieldmaidens. phwooooaarrrr

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I can design and make clothes and pretty good with metal work. Although the risk is that all the guys have really embellished armour, and the women will look like burlesque or alt queens.

Used to grow my own veg, love getting down and dirty.

Also good with woodwork...this is actually true, lol, I love to make things, and as an ex nurse good with splinters too.

Can I join? xx

Yes.. camp us up into sexy Vikings please. The sexier and more personalised the touches on each garment.. the better "

Yay!! And when the warriors are away looking fabulous and doing fighty things, I can provide vegetable or wooden dildos for those who need them, or as a bi lady, distract with my sluttiness- in our minuscule outfits xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Hmmmm..... I have very pale skin which according to Viking heirachy means I don’t work so I’ll need to be Jarl upwards, possibly Queen...?

I can organise the Village’s daily life...

I am quite tanned.. no I don't like it.. my game.. my rules lol.. You can be in Wise Council. They dint do a lot

My first job in Wise Council will be to appoint a new Jarl..... "

Hang on! Are you looking to get BloodEagled Roxi? I'd really rather not you know.. I like your ribs the way they are..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Och, stop playing on the beard viking thing

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I can design and make clothes and pretty good with metal work. Although the risk is that all the guys have really embellished armour, and the women will look like burlesque or alt queens.

Used to grow my own veg, love getting down and dirty.

Also good with woodwork...this is actually true, lol, I love to make things, and as an ex nurse good with splinters too.

Can I join? xx

Yes.. camp us up into sexy Vikings please. The sexier and more personalised the touches on each garment.. the better

Yay!! And when the warriors are away looking fabulous and doing fighty things, I can provide vegetable or wooden dildos for those who need them, or as a bi lady, distract with my sluttiness- in our minuscule outfits xx

"

I don't want to go to war now...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Any groping and pillaging to be had

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I m in if you ll have me, skilled with weaponry, pRticularly blades, am a backwoidsman so can do must stuff and have no problem tgrowing persons over shoulder n running off with em

You're in! Well met Viking man."

Excellent, though must warn you, do have a touch of Loki in me... But all in best possible taste, he says whilst throwing one leg over other to sit crosslegged with tomahawk in lap.. I know thats north american but if ya see it you ll allow it

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Any groping and pillaging to be had "

I'd ask first.. specially round here

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I m in if you ll have me, skilled with weaponry, pRticularly blades, am a backwoidsman so can do must stuff and have no problem tgrowing persons over shoulder n running off with em

You're in! Well met Viking man.

Excellent, though must warn you, do have a touch of Loki in me... But all in best possible taste, he says whilst throwing one leg over other to sit crosslegged with tomahawk in lap.. I know thats north american but if ya see it you ll allow it "

It wouldn't be a Norse village without a touch of Loki now would it?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hmmmm..... I have very pale skin which according to Viking heirachy means I don’t work so I’ll need to be Jarl upwards, possibly Queen...?

I can organise the Village’s daily life...

I am quite tanned.. no I don't like it.. my game.. my rules lol.. You can be in Wise Council. They dint do a lot

My first job in Wise Council will be to appoint a new Jarl.....

Hang on! Are you looking to get BloodEagled Roxi? I'd really rather not you know.. I like your ribs the way they are.."

Hmm bloodeagle certainly would inhibit style and motion and ruin any chance of good tits... That being said i have a great set of nordic birch handled blades that would achieve this plus bonus, you get to enjoy the beauty of the blade and its wonderful balanced weight

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Hmmmm..... I have very pale skin which according to Viking heirachy means I don’t work so I’ll need to be Jarl upwards, possibly Queen...?

I can organise the Village’s daily life...

I am quite tanned.. no I don't like it.. my game.. my rules lol.. You can be in Wise Council. They dint do a lot

My first job in Wise Council will be to appoint a new Jarl.....

Hang on! Are you looking to get BloodEagled Roxi? I'd really rather not you know.. I like your ribs the way they are..

Hmm bloodeagle certainly would inhibit style and motion and ruin any chance of good tits... That being said i have a great set of nordic birch handled blades that would achieve this plus bonus, you get to enjoy the beauty of the blade and its wonderful balanced weight "

MUHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA What's it to be RoxiAnne? Content with your place in the Elder Council? Or are you going to use it to usurp my authority once more?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I m in if you ll have me, skilled with weaponry, pRticularly blades, am a backwoidsman so can do must stuff and have no problem tgrowing persons over shoulder n running off with em

You're in! Well met Viking man.

Excellent, though must warn you, do have a touch of Loki in me... But all in best possible taste, he says whilst throwing one leg over other to sit crosslegged with tomahawk in lap.. I know thats north american but if ya see it you ll allow it

It wouldn't be a Norse village without a touch of Loki now would it?"

No way.. Just curious are the only horns gonna be those between our legs and drinking vessels etc or are you after the victorian depiction of a horned viking helmet

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I m in if you ll have me, skilled with weaponry, pRticularly blades, am a backwoidsman so can do must stuff and have no problem tgrowing persons over shoulder n running off with em

You're in! Well met Viking man.

Excellent, though must warn you, do have a touch of Loki in me... But all in best possible taste, he says whilst throwing one leg over other to sit crosslegged with tomahawk in lap.. I know thats north american but if ya see it you ll allow it

It wouldn't be a Norse village without a touch of Loki now would it?

No way.. Just curious are the only horns gonna be those between our legs and drinking vessels etc or are you after the victorian depiction of a horned viking helmet "

Only drinking horns Viking style.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I mean it's a lotto fund after all.. we have to maintain some semblance of authenticity.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I m in if you ll have me, skilled with weaponry, pRticularly blades, am a backwoidsman so can do must stuff and have no problem tgrowing persons over shoulder n running off with em

You're in! Well met Viking man.

Excellent, though must warn you, do have a touch of Loki in me... But all in best possible taste, he says whilst throwing one leg over other to sit crosslegged with tomahawk in lap.. I know thats north american but if ya see it you ll allow it

It wouldn't be a Norse village without a touch of Loki now would it?

No way.. Just curious are the only horns gonna be those between our legs and drinking vessels etc or are you after the victorian depiction of a horned viking helmet

Only drinking horns Viking style."

Thank fk... Need to keep it authentic

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Wonder.. Howabout we try seeing how we fair hanging in a tree for nine days.. Or we could try to wrestle with old age, outdrink the ocean or out eat wildfire... You know over a few drinking horns of mead

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hmmmm..... I have very pale skin which according to Viking heirachy means I don’t work so I’ll need to be Jarl upwards, possibly Queen...?

I can organise the Village’s daily life...

I am quite tanned.. no I don't like it.. my game.. my rules lol.. You can be in Wise Council. They dint do a lot

My first job in Wise Council will be to appoint a new Jarl.....

Hang on! Are you looking to get BloodEagled Roxi? I'd really rather not you know.. I like your ribs the way they are..

Hmm bloodeagle certainly would inhibit style and motion and ruin any chance of good tits... That being said i have a great set of nordic birch handled blades that would achieve this plus bonus, you get to enjoy the beauty of the blade and its wonderful balanced weight "

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay"

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup...."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup...."

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup...."

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I left for a while.... you know - normal life

Am I still kissing you ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I left for a while.... you know - normal life

Am I still kissing you ?"

I believe so.. lots of others too now.. you did say everyone

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you.."

Fk me a fab viking wedding, this I gotta attend... Could I be your taster etc.. You know try out all goods and persons to ensure they re not a threat.. You ll be suprised a small weapon could be hidden and it would ensure a longevity of life

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you..

Fk me a fab viking wedding, this I gotta attend... Could I be your taster etc.. You know try out all goods and persons to ensure they re not a threat.. You ll be suprised a small weapon could be hidden and it would ensure a longevity of life "

Judging by get domineering behaviour, I think I'm going to have on insist on a testing. The Jarls valuables depend on it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you..

Fk me a fab viking wedding, this I gotta attend... Could I be your taster etc.. You know try out all goods and persons to ensure they re not a threat.. You ll be suprised a small weapon could be hidden and it would ensure a longevity of life

Judging by get domineering behaviour, I think I'm going to have on insist on a testing. The Jarls valuables depend on it."

Well if it goes tits up for me can ya form a roman town and I ll be a bloody eunuch

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I left for a while.... you know - normal life

Am I still kissing you ?

I believe so.. lots of others too now.. you did say everyone"

I’m not slutty ... there was only three of us up there

Jesus - I’ll pass now

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you..

Fk me a fab viking wedding, this I gotta attend... Could I be your taster etc.. You know try out all goods and persons to ensure they re not a threat.. You ll be suprised a small weapon could be hidden and it would ensure a longevity of life

Judging by get domineering behaviour, I think I'm going to have on insist on a testing. The Jarls valuables depend on it.

Well if it goes tits up for me can ya form a roman town and I ll be a bloody eunuch "

Agreed. I admire your courage. We shall name the Gods after you Brother TreeMonkey. If you fare ill on your quest, I'll find with you in the Halls of Valhalla.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you..

Fk me a fab viking wedding, this I gotta attend... Could I be your taster etc.. You know try out all goods and persons to ensure they re not a threat.. You ll be suprised a small weapon could be hidden and it would ensure a longevity of life

Judging by get domineering behaviour, I think I'm going to have on insist on a testing. The Jarls valuables depend on it.

Well if it goes tits up for me can ya form a roman town and I ll be a bloody eunuch

Agreed. I admire your courage. We shall name the Gods after you Brother TreeMonkey. If you fare ill on your quest, I'll find with you in the Halls of Valhalla."

Fkin A... Old warriors dont die they just regroup in Valhalla

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you..

Fk me a fab viking wedding, this I gotta attend... Could I be your taster etc.. You know try out all goods and persons to ensure they re not a threat.. You ll be suprised a small weapon could be hidden and it would ensure a longevity of life

Judging by get domineering behaviour, I think I'm going to have on insist on a testing. The Jarls valuables depend on it.

Well if it goes tits up for me can ya form a roman town and I ll be a bloody eunuch

Agreed. I admire your courage. We shall name the Gods after you Brother TreeMonkey. If you fare ill on your quest, I'll find with you in the Halls of Valhalla.

Fkin A... Old warriors dont die they just regroup in Valhalla "

Amen to that brother

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you..

Fk me a fab viking wedding, this I gotta attend... Could I be your taster etc.. You know try out all goods and persons to ensure they re not a threat.. You ll be suprised a small weapon could be hidden and it would ensure a longevity of life

Judging by get domineering behaviour, I think I'm going to have on insist on a testing. The Jarls valuables depend on it.

Well if it goes tits up for me can ya form a roman town and I ll be a bloody eunuch

Agreed. I admire your courage. We shall name the Gods after you Brother TreeMonkey. If you fare ill on your quest, I'll find with you in the Halls of Valhalla."

Oh thats ok cos I ve actually got a training gladius and yes its proper sharp n pointy not a toy.. Courtesy Southern swords

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you..

Fk me a fab viking wedding, this I gotta attend... Could I be your taster etc.. You know try out all goods and persons to ensure they re not a threat.. You ll be suprised a small weapon could be hidden and it would ensure a longevity of life

Judging by get domineering behaviour, I think I'm going to have on insist on a testing. The Jarls valuables depend on it.

Well if it goes tits up for me can ya form a roman town and I ll be a bloody eunuch

Agreed. I admire your courage. We shall name the Gods after you Brother TreeMonkey. If you fare ill on your quest, I'll find with you in the Halls of Valhalla.

Oh thats ok cos I ve actually got a training gladius and yes its proper sharp n pointy not a toy.. Courtesy Southern swords "

Ps I ve already run Hadrians wall in full battle kit and passed inside centurions entry time.. Whoop whoop

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you..

Fk me a fab viking wedding, this I gotta attend... Could I be your taster etc.. You know try out all goods and persons to ensure they re not a threat.. You ll be suprised a small weapon could be hidden and it would ensure a longevity of life "

Errrrr.....I haven’t accepted yet!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"you will respect ma authoritaaaaay

Don’t underestimate me young pup....

Marry me.. that way I can keep a closer eye on you..

Fk me a fab viking wedding, this I gotta attend... Could I be your taster etc.. You know try out all goods and persons to ensure they re not a threat.. You ll be suprised a small weapon could be hidden and it would ensure a longevity of life

Errrrr.....I haven’t accepted yet!"

I was wondering..

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By *andybeachWoman  over a year ago

In the middle

I have just returned from a scavenging party to the land knows as Marksnsparks, so I can prepare a feast for the village, or I could just be a big buxom shieldmaden and keep yer blokes in line

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I have just returned from a scavenging party to the land knows as Marksnsparks, so I can prepare a feast for the village, or I could just be a big buxom shieldmaden and keep yer blokes in line "

I think the men would be delighted for you to do either

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Shield Maiden ready for battle!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle! "

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead."

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I can hunt and food gather... Morrison's warrior princess

I can laiden a table with a good feast.. lots to munch on.

Oh and...I'm a part time nurse (might come in handy to tend to the wounded )

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'll be the village barber Contrary to popular belief, Vikings kept their hair short. The earliest depictions mirror this and on a practical level, warriors tended to keep their hair short so enemies couldn't grab hold of it and pull them off balance, or off their horses. The long braided hair and horned helmets were a Victorian-era romantic invention.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho "

Yes!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I can hunt and food gather... Morrison's warrior princess

I can laiden a table with a good feast.. lots to munch on.

Oh and...I'm a part time nurse (might come in handy to tend to the wounded )"

Invaluable skills in this small family of wierdos

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'll be the village barber Contrary to popular belief, Vikings kept their hair short. The earliest depictions mirror this and on a practical level, warriors tended to keep their hair short so enemies couldn't grab hold of it and pull them off balance, or off their horses. The long braided hair and horned helmets were a Victorian-era romantic invention."

I didn't know that.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!"

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song "

Derived not evolved lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'll be the village barber Contrary to popular belief, Vikings kept their hair short. The earliest depictions mirror this and on a practical level, warriors tended to keep their hair short so enemies couldn't grab hold of it and pull them off balance, or off their horses. The long braided hair and horned helmets were a Victorian-era romantic invention.

I didn't know that."

I shall be known as Lothar the Layerer

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

Derived not evolved lol "

You're in! I'm not letting you back in the smoking room now

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

that's awesome

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song "

Aww I want to work in a castle now

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

Aww I want to work in a castle now"

So do I.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song "

Quick you’d better appoint a Mead maker pup

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

Derived not evolved lol

You're in! I'm not letting you back in the smoking room now "

Feck off...... my smoking shelter is the place to be!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

Aww I want to work in a castle now"

Best job ever

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

Aww I want to work in a castle now

So do I."

I have mead in my kitchen cupboard so I think Im qualified enough

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I had it two nights ago.. so quite clearly I am as well

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

Aww I want to work in a castle now

Best job ever "

have u the best eyes EVER?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

Quick you’d better appoint a Mead maker pup"

It's so fucking strong tho! They used to keep the mead in the store room and that's where I would sit and have a fag..... and also drink the mead

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

Aww I want to work in a castle now

Best job ever

have u the best eyes EVER?"

Totes

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By *andybeachWoman  over a year ago

In the middle


"I'll be the village barber Contrary to popular belief, Vikings kept their hair short. The earliest depictions mirror this and on a practical level, warriors tended to keep their hair short so enemies couldn't grab hold of it and pull them off balance, or off their horses. The long braided hair and horned helmets were a Victorian-era romantic invention."

Ffs don’t spoil it for me now

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

Quick you’d better appoint a Mead maker pup"

Is it wrong that I get a cock blush when you call me pup?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Shield Maiden ready for battle!

Come share a comfy seat in the longhouse were not fighting at the moment.. just slowly sozzled on mead.

Wanna know a fact about mead? You'll probably already know it tho

Yes!

Ok, many moons ago I used to work in a castle, they would host medieval functions and I was a server/singer. I would stand on the stage and give a brief spiel about each course etc and then sing medieval ditties accompanied by a harp one of my spiels was about mead and it went like this..... ahem......

"In medieval times, honey l8ke salt was a very prized possession, it was used for burns, sore throats and many other maladies. Once fermented and boiled with water it became a very potent drink, mead. Mead was used by newly married couples for one month after their wedding to fortify their virility and fertility, and it is from this use of mead that the idea of One Moon of Honey, or a Honeymoon was evolved"

Then I'd take a step back and burst into song

Derived not evolved lol

You're in! I'm not letting you back in the smoking room now

Feck off...... my smoking shelter is the place to be! "

Vikings.. did you hear that insolent tone! How very dare you sexy eyes!

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By *ewrocksWoman  over a year ago

button moon

I can look after most animals hunt /fish and prep my own kills, but I'm a shit cook. Decent first aid skills and put my fence up yesterday so fairly handy. Also good with a sword, can I come?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Mounted warrior please.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I can look after most animals hunt /fish and prep my own kills, but I'm a shit cook. Decent first aid skills and put my fence up yesterday so fairly handy. Also good with a sword, can I come? "

In in in

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Mounted warrior please."

Any particular preference?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Mounted warrior please."

How often would you need mounting?

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By *ewrocksWoman  over a year ago

button moon


"I can look after most animals hunt /fish and prep my own kills, but I'm a shit cook. Decent first aid skills and put my fence up yesterday so fairly handy. Also good with a sword, can I come?

In in in "

Sounds like something I'd enjoy.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I can look after most animals hunt /fish and prep my own kills, but I'm a shit cook. Decent first aid skills and put my fence up yesterday so fairly handy. Also good with a sword, can I come?

In in in

Sounds like something I'd enjoy. "

Sounds like something you'd be bloody good at! An asset

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By *andybeachWoman  over a year ago

In the middle

I even have the hardware

Too much ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I even have the hardware

Too much ? "

Now that's horny

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By *andybeachWoman  over a year ago

In the middle


"I even have the hardware

Too much ?

Now that's horny "

Thanks

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I even have the hardware

Too much ? "

You're definately in

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Mounted warrior please.

Any particular preference?"

Yes I will have 16.2 Dun with black points Dutch Warmblood please

And Archery kit for hunting

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Mounted warrior please.

Any particular preference?

Yes I will have 16.2 Dun with black points Dutch Warmblood please

And Archery kit for hunting "

Done. Welcome fierce woman..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Room for a little one? Can i be head of the entertainment committee? Games and Feasts etc...

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Room for a little one? Can i be head of the entertainment committee? Games and Feasts etc... "

*Jarl Ghengis gets another cock blush*

Anything you want.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Room for a little one? Can i be head of the entertainment committee? Games and Feasts etc...

*Jarl Ghengis gets another cock blush*

Anything you want."

You and your blushy cock Ghengs

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Room for a little one? Can i be head of the entertainment committee? Games and Feasts etc...

*Jarl Ghengis gets another cock blush*

Anything you want.

You and your blushy cock Ghengs"

done

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