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Hysterical Love Honey review
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Came across this review whilst browsing Douces....
That could have gone better
Reviewed: 18 January 2019 by Abbey's Husband , a Straight Married Male
My wife and I have been together for a year now and we have some pretty kinky sex, and we seem to be pushing the boundaries more often than not. We already indulge in anal play, but as things move on so does our sex life. We already have a healthy selection of toys, but after a weird discussion talking about strap ons I just decided to buy some new gear and go for it. I'll save that for another review.
This review is the douche.
So I thought I'd get cleared out internally before hand as we've had a few incidents in the past and I didn't want to put her off being dirty. Sticking a couple of fingers up there covered in Lynx Africa wasn't going to cut it this time. I opened the box and like any good bloke totally ignored the instructions. I got a jug out of the kitchen cupboard and headed up to the bathroom armed and ready. Clothes off and into the shower. Filled the jug with warm water, at which point the wife decided I wouldn't be able to do it myself and offered to help.
First mistake!
She sucked up the water and then proceeded to stick the nozzle up my poop chute and squeezed. The sensation was pretty nice but my initial thought was that it shouldn't sound like it was gurgling. So lesson one is to make sure that all of the air is expelled before insertion commences.
I stood there for about 30 seconds, at which point it started raining out of my arse. The water ran clean but I wasn't convinced, so I suggested we go again. Bent over again, nozzle inserted, lots of gurgling. And laughter. I stood up with an anal cavity full of water and air and squeezed as hard as I could. And shit myself.
Now the wife is a pretty tough cookie but even she was on the verge of gagging. So with nuggets of poop running down the bath towards the plug I insisted we go again. More warm water and much gurgling again I clenched my butt cheeks determined to let it work loose any other clunkers that may be lurking. By this time the pair of us were in hysterics and holding back the tide and tears wasn't going to happen. So I loosed my bowels and dumped more mini poops into the bath. At least the shower was washing them away.
About this time the added air started to make it's presence felt so not only was I shitting in the bath but farting the tune of the national anthem.
Decided to go all out and have one last go and by now the wife was managing to fill me up with warm water and not air.
I was running clean and decided I was done.
Did the whole strap on thing with no nasty surprises but that's another story.
So... Does it work? Yes, marvellously. Did it get me clean? Yes totally. Would I recommend? Yes!
A word of warning however... If you let your wife do it to you make sure she expels all the air from the bulb first. I'm lying in bed about 3 hours later and I keep blowing the duvet off! But I don't think I'll need to crap for at least a couple of days |
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Love honey reviews are a great comedy platform.
