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What do you call a positive Avocado?

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman over a year ago

Under the Duvet

An Avacando!

Well it made me laugh anyway .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why did the banana have dinner with a prune?

Cos he couldn't find a real date

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By *irth.Minge.FireMan over a year ago

Seen in far off places

This reminds me of the vegetable who escaped prison?

An escapea

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Yay! Keep em coming!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/02/19 13:46:41]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My friend nearly drowned in her muesli this morning

She was pulled in by a strong current

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What do you get when you cross a paramedic and a citrus fruit?

Lemon-aid!

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman over a year ago

Under the Duvet

What do you call an itchy apple?

A crab apple.

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Why did the tomato blush?

It saw the salad dressing.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/02/19 13:56:56]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why do fungi need to pay double the fare on buses?

Because they take up too mushroom.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why did the tomato blush?

It saw the salad dressing. "

It also got embarrassed when it saw the chick pea.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why did the tomato blush?

It saw the salad dressing.

It also got embarrassed when it saw the chick pea."

Was it an NSAchickpea?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why did the tomato blush?

It saw the salad dressing.

It also got embarrassed when it saw the chick pea.

Was it an NSAchickpea?"

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"Why did the tomato blush?

It saw the salad dressing.

It also got embarrassed when it saw the chick pea.

Was it an NSAchickpea?"

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Oh I love daft jokes!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why do mushrooms get invited to all the parties?

Because they are such fungis

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why don’t eggs tell jokes?

Cos they’d crack each other up.

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By *ay123mailMan over a year ago

Seaham

What type of footwear is made from banna peels?

Slippers

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

I once had a boyfriend who didn't like my food puns.

I had to let that mango.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Which vegetable can sink ships?

Leeks

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By *anky_PankyWoman over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

Why did the orange stop?

Cause it ran out of juice.....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why did the tomato blush?

It saw the salad dressing.

It also got embarrassed when it saw the chick pea.

Was it an NSAchickpea?

It was too good an opportunity to miss lol

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Which veg chases sheep?

A caulie!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What do you call a chicken with a lettuce on its beak?

Chicken ceasa salad

I'll get me coat

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I once had a boyfriend who didn't like my food puns.

I had to let that mango. "

Haha

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By *uciyassMan over a year ago

sheffield

My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day…

When she was pulled in by a strong Currant

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why do melons have big weddings?

Because they cantaloupe

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By *cousesubsallyWoman over a year ago

Somewhere out there

Why do the French eat snails?

They don’t like fast food...

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple over a year ago

Cumbria

Two fish in a tank one fish rest of the other who's Driving this thing anyway

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"Why do the French eat snails?

They don’t like fast food...

I heard taking the shell off my racing snail would make him faster.

But it just made him more sluggish.

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By *aughtyGent86Man over a year ago

Stockport

What do you call a Mexican peeping tom?

Senor Boobs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Knock knock

Who’s there?

The interrupting cow

The interrupting cow w....MOO!!!!!!!!

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman over a year ago

Under the Duvet

It's the way you tell 'em lol

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By *yronutMan over a year ago

St Austell

Two parrots sitting on a perch...... One said to the other...... ‘Can you small fish....... ?!?’

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why did the tomato blush?

It saw the salad dressing.

It also got embarrassed when it saw the chick pea.

Was it an NSAchickpea?

Can't imagine what it would have done if it saw the salad tossing

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By *ebjonnsonMan over a year ago

Maldon

"An Avacando!

Well it made me laugh anyway ."

Very good.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The difference between a fridge and a vagina? ..... the fridge doesn't make a noise when you pull the meat out.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why do the French eat snails?

They don’t like fast food...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

my hamster went in my hoover and it died... apparently nothing can survive in a vacuum

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