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Pretty and dumb
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
Ive seen it mentioned and implied a few times today (and in general) that if a person is good looking or fit then by association then theyre dull or dumb, or the opposite association; if someone is larger or is less concerned with their appearance then they're going to be nicer and a kind person.
Do you agree with this concept, is it a theory that you prescribe to?
Do you maybe have experience of this, or do you think that binary options like this are limited at best?
Let's have your thoughts folks |
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We all know it’s total bollocks!
Sweeping generalisations seem to make people feel better though!
I’ve really no idea why!
I doubt very attractive and intelligent people with wonderful personalities who are living precisely the life they want to live worry much about these generalisations though!  |
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My ex Mrs is a school head teacher so you would assume that she is reasonably intelligent.
We had a romantic weekend in London and were walking along the river Thames when she suddenly asked'who on earth needs a house as big as that'?
She was looking at the houses of parliament!!! |
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I think it's based on the idea some have that our talents have to balance out. Unfortunately it just isn't true.
The fittest people I know are incredibly clever: working out how to train effectively etc is actually somewhat intellectually taxing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I think these sweeping generalisations are indicative of lazy thinking and are often used by people with low self esteem or a giant chip on their shoulder.
"
I'd probably add to that about the larger people/less groomed thing that people sometimes feel the need to justify their attraction to anything out of "the norm". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ive seen it mentioned and implied a few times today (and in general) that if a person is good looking or fit then by association then theyre dull or dumb, or the opposite association; if someone is larger or is less concerned with their appearance then they're going to be nicer and a kind person.
Do you agree with this concept, is it a theory that you prescribe to?
Do you maybe have experience of this, or do you think that binary options like this are limited at best?
Let's have your thoughts folks"
I used to. Now? Not at all.
I thought all attractive people were shallow and up their own arse. I don't think this is the case either. Think I was a bit of a prat for thinking so  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have two degrees, uses long words, can hold an intelligible conversation on most subjects.
I Confuzzle people with my wit, sarcasm and knowledge.
And I'm veh pretty!
And not i'm that fat! Chubby, but not fat.
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Personally I think these sweeping generalisations are indicative of lazy thinking and are often used by people with low self esteem or a giant chip on their shoulder.
"
I do agree with you, I often find that they're used as a reference by people who want to demonstrate their virtue or put people down. Also by people who want to demonstrate that they're different because they're not like the pretty and dumb people.
Personally I think that binary thinking or pigeon holing people says far more about the person thinking it. |
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"Personally I think these sweeping generalisations are indicative of lazy thinking and are often used by people with low self esteem or a giant chip on their shoulder.
I'd probably add to that about the larger people/less groomed thing that people sometimes feel the need to justify their attraction to anything out of "the norm". "
I think a lot of what people say and do is about justifying themselves. There's also the insulting one group to curry favour with the other. Don't even get me started on this "real" men and women rubbish that's often spouted. |
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"Personally I think these sweeping generalisations are indicative of lazy thinking and are often used by people with low self esteem or a giant chip on their shoulder.
I do agree with you, I often find that they're used as a reference by people who want to demonstrate their virtue or put people down. Also by people who want to demonstrate that they're different because they're not like the pretty and dumb people.
Personally I think that binary thinking or pigeon holing people says far more about the person thinking it. "
Yes!
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
ZNope I dont agree, I try to visualise it in my head as a Venn diagram. Also just because someone is academically intelligent or climes Snowden every weekend, does not make them interesting or street smart for want of a better word. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the size or looks of someone does not have any realm impact on how they are as a person.
I agree that society tends to try and label people due to their looks.
I.e a gym fit guy is in love with himself. Now there are some guys like that but alot of then are not.
Same as far men. I am fat so I am supposed to be jolly but alot of the time I am grumpy lol.
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"ZNope I dont agree, I try to visualise it in my head as a Venn diagram. Also just because someone is academically intelligent or climes Snowden every weekend, does not make them interesting or street smart for want of a better word. "
But it doesn't mean they're uninteresting or not street smart either. |
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
"ZNope I dont agree, I try to visualise it in my head as a Venn diagram. Also just because someone is academically intelligent or climes Snowden every weekend, does not make them interesting or street smart for want of a better word.
But it doesn't mean they're uninteresting or not street smart either."
Yes of courses, they maybe they may not be. No two people are exactly alike. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
You see it often on here and yet for me it's a stereotype that I thought had been left behind in the 70s which is where it was made, with suggestions of things like blonde dollybirds who were attractive but didn't have two brain cells to rub together.
As has been said already I think it's often rolled out by some on here to justify a lack of "success" when someone who can't get meets is looking for something to blame for their "failure", when they'd actually be better off looking closer to home for the reason. |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"ZNope I dont agree, I try to visualise it in my head as a Venn diagram. Also just because someone is academically intelligent or climes Snowden every weekend, does not make them interesting or street smart for want of a better word.
But it doesn't mean they're uninteresting or not street smart either."
Exactly, a person is unique. Without getting to know them you know nothing about them for good or ill. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It really starts with what we deem as intelligence.
Alot of the time we mistake book smart with someone being intelligent
In 1983 an American developmental psychologist Howard Gardener described 9 types of intelligence.
Naturalist (nature smart)
Musical (sound smart)
Logical-mathematical (number/reasoning smart)
Existential (life smart)
Interpersonal (people smart)
Bodily-kinesthetic (body smart)
Linguistic (word smart)
Intra-personal (self smart)
Spatial (picture smart)
Then add into the mix emotional intelligent it's not as simply as we think.
I also think there is a difference when you look at if someone is interesting to talk to and them being intelligent as we all have things we love to share. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m attractive and intelligent. And I’m not being big headed when I say it.
Gem.
*Subjectively *
Ah you got me. Perhaps I’m not so intelligent  "
Attractive, intelligent and a good sense of humour, you’ve cracked it!
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I’m sure these stereotypes exist but there are also people who are lucky enough to be beautiful and intelligent, or sadly thick and unattractive. This is life’s rich tapestry we can’t and definitely shouldn’t be the same, or find the same thing attractive.
For me there has to be an attraction physically but they don’t have to be an Adonis. An intelligent and interesting guy is a big turn on as they tend to be the best lovers, the most inventive and imaginative. The brain is the best sex aid in my opinion. I like to think I have a good balance I’m no supermodel but attractive and intelligent.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m attractive and intelligent. And I’m not being big headed when I say it.
Gem.
*Subjectively *
Ah you got me. Perhaps I’m not so intelligent
Attractive, intelligent and a good sense of humour, you’ve cracked it!
"
Phew! I think haha! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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From a purely personal point of view I know the majority of people look at me and think the same thing. Both in the real world and on fab. And I really couldn’t care-a-less.
Generalisation just don’t work as a concept. They’re simply too general |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m sure these stereotypes exist but there are also people who are lucky enough to be beautiful and intelligent, or sadly thick and unattractive. This is life’s rich tapestry we can’t and definitely shouldn’t be the same, or find the same thing attractive.
For me there has to be an attraction physically but they don’t have to be an Adonis. An intelligent and interesting guy is a big turn on as they tend to be the best lovers, the most inventive and imaginative. The brain is the best sex aid in my opinion. I like to think I have a good balance I’m no supermodel but attractive and intelligent.
"
Love this! |
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By *r.BlondeMan
over a year ago
Chester/Wirral |
"Ive seen it mentioned and implied a few times today (and in general) that if a person is good looking or fit then by association then theyre dull or dumb, or the opposite association; if someone is larger or is less concerned with their appearance then they're going to be nicer and a kind person.
Do you agree with this concept, is it a theory that you prescribe to?
Do you maybe have experience of this, or do you think that binary options like this are limited at best?
Let's have your thoughts folks"
I blow this theory out of the water.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would describe myself as sapiosexual, so for me I'd rather have the intelligent conversation than the Adonis looks. If I can find both, well that's just the icing on the cake! 
Also, being academic doesn't mean that you necessarily have emotional intelligence or common sense. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ive seen it mentioned and implied a few times today (and in general) that if a person is good looking or fit then by association then theyre dull or dumb, or the opposite association; if someone is larger or is less concerned with their appearance then they're going to be nicer and a kind person.
Do you agree with this concept, is it a theory that you prescribe to?
Do you maybe have experience of this, or do you think that binary options like this are limited at best?
Let's have your thoughts folks
I blow this theory out of the water. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ZNope I dont agree, I try to visualise it in my head as a Venn diagram. Also just because someone is academically intelligent or climes Snowden every weekend, does not make them interesting or street smart for want of a better word.
But it doesn't mean they're uninteresting or not street smart either.
Yes of courses, they maybe they may not be.
***
No two people are exactly alike.
*** "
*** |
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"Ive seen it mentioned and implied a few times today (and in general) that if a person is good looking or fit then by association then theyre dull or dumb, or the opposite association; if someone is larger or is less concerned with their appearance then they're going to be nicer and a kind person.
Do you agree with this concept, is it a theory that you prescribe to?
Do you maybe have experience of this, or do you think that binary options like this are limited at best?
Let's have your thoughts folks"
Nah..... I'm fat and look like a bulldog chewing a wasp and I'm a right grumpy bitch  |
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"Ive seen it mentioned and implied a few times today (and in general) that if a person is good looking or fit then by association then theyre dull or dumb, or the opposite association; if someone is larger or is less concerned with their appearance then they're going to be nicer and a kind person.
Do you agree with this concept, is it a theory that you prescribe to?
Do you maybe have experience of this, or do you think that binary options like this are limited at best?
Let's have your thoughts folks"
I think that this is a notion to make the less attractive feel better about themselves .
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It only really applies to the media.
The media are fond of bigger women comedians, ones who will make fun of themselves and their weight so we can laugh at them.
But the media is rampant with this stuff, average height of a black american is 5'9 but in general they put on tall big ones. They put on short asians, and in general, most white men they put on, fall in the "average" selection. Even the best looking white men in the media are the attractive end of average, not stupidly handsome men.
The media makes the prettier girls dumber because they need a reason for her to have sex with mr average over here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m sure these stereotypes exist but there are also people who are lucky enough to be beautiful and intelligent, or sadly thick and unattractive. This is life’s rich tapestry we can’t and definitely shouldn’t be the same, or find the same thing attractive.
For me there has to be an attraction physically but they don’t have to be an Adonis. An intelligent and interesting guy is a big turn on as they tend to be the best lovers, the most inventive and imaginative. The brain is the best sex aid in my opinion. I like to think I have a good balance I’m no supermodel but attractive and intelligent.
"
I concur with this lady, she said it so much more eloquently than I would have. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the only stereotype that has an element of truth to it is the crazy/hotness combination.
Some of the hottest women I know are the craziest, why, because super good looking guys go for these women but can get women all over the place so they mess these women around and bring out their hidden crazy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think the only stereotype that has an element of truth to it is the crazy/hotness combination.
Some of the hottest women I know are the craziest, why, because super good looking guys go for these women but can get women all over the place so they mess these women around and bring out their hidden crazy. "
I find crazy has no corrolation to any other attribute  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m sure these stereotypes exist but there are also people who are lucky enough to be beautiful and intelligent, or sadly thick and unattractive. This is life’s rich tapestry we can’t and definitely shouldn’t be the same, or find the same thing attractive.
For me there has to be an attraction physically but they don’t have to be an Adonis. An intelligent and interesting guy is a big turn on as they tend to be the best lovers, the most inventive and imaginative. The brain is the best sex aid in my opinion. I like to think I have a good balance I’m no supermodel but attractive and intelligent.
"
Very well said and I couldn’t agree more |
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"Ive seen it mentioned and implied a few times today (and in general) that if a person is good looking or fit then by association then theyre dull or dumb, or the opposite association; if someone is larger or is less concerned with their appearance then they're going to be nicer and a kind person.
Do you agree with this concept, is it a theory that you prescribe to?
Do you maybe have experience of this, or do you think that binary options like this are limited at best?
Let's have your thoughts folks"
I've never understood that either, I think it's something (some) fat and ugly people say to make themselves feel better. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The consensus is (not set in stone) Attractive, Intelligent, Nice. You can only have 2.
Haha and which two are you?"
According to my Ex attractive and intelligent, which would suggest I'm not particularly nice and I'd have to agree. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’d never say I was attractive- I’m not that confident about myself.
However on paper I’m intelligent, but I know I lack quite a bit common sense. I wouldn’t dare repeat some of the things I’ve said! Haha.
It’s absolutely individual & subjective. |
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I was in an archaeology lecture once and a discussion took place about what our positions would have been in a bronze age society. I was wondering aloud what I would have done and the female teacher said "you would have laid around and looked pretty" or words to that effect . I was the only woman pupil and incidentally the highest achieving as far as marks were concerned. These stereotypes and generalisations are entrenched |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So I'm dumb some times clever sometimes can be dull when I want to be, not slim but not big but I am pretty.....but I think you generalisation of this is diabolical as people are who they are,whether a person is catorgarized as small,medium or large. If this makes no sense it's because I've had a little drink or two haha. Oppppsssiiii . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think that the 'dumb' could definitely teach something I can't do.
I don't see intelligence as something that has to be a certain way otherwise we are all fucking dumb in someway.
Because the ones who keeps claiming that they are intelligent would look totally dumb in situations they are not used it.
For instance, the ones who can't help themselves to use fancy words on the forums...to show off how intelligent they are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think that the 'dumb' could definitely teach something I can't do.
I don't see intelligence as something that has to be a certain way otherwise we are all fucking dumb in someway.
Because the ones who keeps claiming that they are intelligent would look totally dumb in situations they are not used it.
For instance, the ones who can't help themselves to use fancy words on the forums...to show off how intelligent they are. "
Like people who describe themselves as 'Sapiosexual' or 'Sapiophile'. I usually think, 'next profile please', as my first thought of them is, 'pretentious wanker'. |
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"I think that the 'dumb' could definitely teach something I can't do.
I don't see intelligence as something that has to be a certain way otherwise we are all fucking dumb in someway.
Because the ones who keeps claiming that they are intelligent would look totally dumb in situations they are not used it.
For instance, the ones who can't help themselves to use fancy words on the forums...to show off how intelligent they are. "
Is having a wide and varied vocabularly perceived as showing off?  I admire it, I think it's good to use as much of language as possible. |
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"I think that the 'dumb' could definitely teach something I can't do.
I don't see intelligence as something that has to be a certain way otherwise we are all fucking dumb in someway.
Because the ones who keeps claiming that they are intelligent would look totally dumb in situations they are not used it.
For instance, the ones who can't help themselves to use fancy words on the forums...to show off how intelligent they are.
Like people who describe themselves as 'Sapiosexual' or 'Sapiophile'. I usually think, 'next profile please', as my first thought of them is, 'pretentious wanker'."
Do you attach your negative perception to the person who admires intelligence or the intelligent person? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think that the 'dumb' could definitely teach something I can't do.
I don't see intelligence as something that has to be a certain way otherwise we are all fucking dumb in someway.
Because the ones who keeps claiming that they are intelligent would look totally dumb in situations they are not used it.
For instance, the ones who can't help themselves to use fancy words on the forums...to show off how intelligent they are.
Like people who describe themselves as 'Sapiosexual' or 'Sapiophile'. I usually think, 'next profile please', as my first thought of them is, 'pretentious wanker'.
Do you attach your negative perception to the person who admires intelligence or the intelligent person? "
Not to the intelligent person. The alleged 'Sapiophile'. Usually what they're really looking for is someone who can hold their own in conversation. As others have said perceived intelligence is subjective. |
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"I was wondering aloud what I would have done and the female teacher said "you would have laid around and looked pretty" or words to that effect . "
Pretty much the one thing you 100% wouldn't have been doing. No one back then got a free pass. |
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"I think that the 'dumb' could definitely teach something I can't do.
I don't see intelligence as something that has to be a certain way otherwise we are all fucking dumb in someway.
Because the ones who keeps claiming that they are intelligent would look totally dumb in situations they are not used it.
For instance, the ones who can't help themselves to use fancy words on the forums...to show off how intelligent they are.
Like people who describe themselves as 'Sapiosexual' or 'Sapiophile'. I usually think, 'next profile please', as my first thought of them is, 'pretentious wanker'.
Do you attach your negative perception to the person who admires intelligence or the intelligent person?
Not to the intelligent person. The alleged 'Sapiophile'. Usually what they're really looking for is someone who can hold their own in conversation. As others have said perceived intelligence is subjective."
Oh, ok.
I like someone to be of a similar or slightly higher level of intelligence and to be quick witted.
I agree intelligence can be subjective but it's undeniable that some people have greater intelligence than others. Mind you I've worked with graduates who don't know their alphabet . My brother who is hugely intelligent, bi lingual and articulate in many areas struggles to tell the time on an analogue clock. |
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"I was wondering aloud what I would have done and the female teacher said "you would have laid around and looked pretty" or words to that effect .
Pretty much the one thing you 100% wouldn't have been doing. No one back then got a free pass."
Exactly but it illustrates the entrenched attitudes some educated/intelligent people hold. Because I am well presented and groomed she assumed I would be useless and possibly shallow. |
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It’s my favouritest.
Wait... What was the question?
