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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So I was just reading yet another "woe is me, everyone on fab is horrible everything's against me so I'm leaving" type thread and it got me thinking about the mentality of it.
Is it just easier to blame other people if something doesn't work?
Have people become lazy in this day and age and just give up rather than work to achieve goals?
We are all here for hedonistic reasons so are the writers of these threads right? Are we too self absorbed and focused to give anyone outside our target suitor a chance?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't really blame other people, my current go to is blaming 'The hormones' when anything goes slightly wrong
Except this morning, having to give my Baby a top and tail wet wipe wash instead of a bath because I got up late was on me 
Nice tits btw
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't really blame other people, my current go to is blaming 'The hormones' when anything goes slightly wrong
Except this morning, having to give my Baby a top and tail wet wipe wash instead of a bath because I got up late was on me
Nice tits btw
"
I reckon you can get a good year or 2 out of the hormones but then you can blame it on the fact you have a toddler. It's all good
And would you like a squeeze? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't really blame other people, my current go to is blaming 'The hormones' when anything goes slightly wrong
Except this morning, having to give my Baby a top and tail wet wipe wash instead of a bath because I got up late was on me
Nice tits btw
I reckon you can get a good year or 2 out of the hormones but then you can blame it on the fact you have a toddler. It's all good
And would you like a squeeze? "
I do intend to get some longevity out of that one
A squeeze with my face  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think lazy comes into it but I often wonder if we re getting used to a world that expects things instantly.. For me its the thrill of the hunt, the chase.. Obviously the reward... I think we live in a world of I want it now and sorry I m not good with communication... But thats my opinion, sorry if its maybe a lil too heavy.. I just blame me when things go tits up or bolloxed   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I was just reading yet another "woe is me, everyone on fab is horrible everything's against me so I'm leaving" type thread and it got me thinking about the mentality of it.
Is it just easier to blame other people if something doesn't work?
Have people become lazy in this day and age and just give up rather than work to achieve goals?
We are all here for hedonistic reasons so are the writers of these threads right? Are we too self absorbed and focused to give anyone outside our target suitor a chance?
"
Fuck rubi... too many questions, I can’t compute that much at once.
Personally speaking I’m not self absorbed at all and give anyone that catches my eye for their chat, interests or pictures on here equal attention.
I do sympathise with the writers of some of those ranty threads as it is obviously hard for the average joe to get his foot in the door to begin with.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I was just reading yet another "woe is me, everyone on fab is horrible everything's against me so I'm leaving" type thread and it got me thinking about the mentality of it.
Is it just easier to blame other people if something doesn't work?
Have people become lazy in this day and age and just give up rather than work to achieve goals?
We are all here for hedonistic reasons so are the writers of these threads right? Are we too self absorbed and focused to give anyone outside our target suitor a chance?
"
Yes. It's far easier to blame others for your own misfortune than to admit that there are things you can do yourself to change the outcomes. A big problem I think some people have is taking constructive criticism as just that, and not as a flat insult against them.
C |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So I was just reading yet another "woe is me, everyone on fab is horrible everything's against me so I'm leaving" type thread and it got me thinking about the mentality of it.
Is it just easier to blame other people if something doesn't work?
Have people become lazy in this day and age and just give up rather than work to achieve goals?
We are all here for hedonistic reasons so are the writers of these threads right? Are we too self absorbed and focused to give anyone outside our target suitor a chance?
Fuck rubi... too many questions, I can’t compute that much at once.
Personally speaking I’m not self absorbed at all and give anyone that catches my eye for their chat, interests or pictures on here equal attention.
I do sympathise with the writers of some of those ranty threads as it is obviously hard for the average joe to get his foot in the door to begin with.
"
I find it hard not to ramble  
I do to an extent but then I think in the grand scheme of things most of the people who do well are average Joes but they are proactive and put the effort in. They tend to know their strengths and weaknesses instead of just blaming others.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"they are proactive and put the effort in. "
This is the best advice. I think some people are used to the instant gratification from fb & ig likes so when it doesn't happen here they don't understand it. Maybe there expectations are too high and level of effort too low.
What do I know, anyway? I'm new here too but enjoying the community as much as anything |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"It seems these days its always someone elses fault. People are quick to blame everyone else before even considering it might be their own."
I do have to agree on this.
I think that's its very easy to look around and blame others for our misfortunes, it's also easy to blame ourselves and to wallow.
It takes a certain type of person to recognise our own faults and failings, to own them, to improve ourselves and move forwards.
It unfortunate that some people behave in an entitled way it's worse though that some people enable that behaviour. I'm not saying that it needs to be challenging or nasty but altering behaviour surely needs to be the goal? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A lot of blokes could literally do everything right and still not get a meet, the brutal truth is it comes down to how hot you are and if you’re average or below, you have a very slim chance of getting a meet. So I don’t blame them for getting pissed off. But saying that a lot of blokes don’t help themselves, it’s really not hard to write a bio and put a few decent photos together. Where as an average woman can stick up a photo of her tits and say come and get me and she would be inundated. But that’s the way it should be. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"A lot of blokes could literally do everything right and still not get a meet, the brutal truth is it comes down to how hot you are and if you’re average or below, you have a very slim chance of getting a meet. So I don’t blame them for getting pissed off. But saying that a lot of blokes don’t help themselves, it’s really not hard to write a bio and put a few decent photos together. Where as an average woman can stick up a photo of her tits and say come and get me and she would be inundated. But that’s the way it should be. "
I disagree with your point about it being on looks, effort and attitude get you a long long way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A lot of blokes could literally do everything right and still not get a meet, the brutal truth is it comes down to how hot you are and if you’re average or below, you have a very slim chance of getting a meet. So I don’t blame them for getting pissed off. But saying that a lot of blokes don’t help themselves, it’s really not hard to write a bio and put a few decent photos together. Where as an average woman can stick up a photo of her tits and say come and get me and she would be inundated. But that’s the way it should be. "
I agree apart from your last sentence.
I think some men do try but they just get ignored. If I'd mailed 100 people with a nice message and every single one of them ignored me, I'd feel like utter shit.
It's a horrible feeling and the piss taking by some people on here is really crap. They have no empathy at all yet they pretend to be kind.
As for the minimal profiles, they might not know what to say. The site can be intimidating to an outsider/ newbie.
Sure they could write a load of generic shite as per the 'profile advice' threads but still get ignored.
But I do also agree with the OP that sometimes people do blame others when it's their own fault. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A lot of blokes could literally do everything right and still not get a meet, the brutal truth is it comes down to how hot you are and if you’re average or below, you have a very slim chance of getting a meet. So I don’t blame them for getting pissed off. But saying that a lot of blokes don’t help themselves, it’s really not hard to write a bio and put a few decent photos together. Where as an average woman can stick up a photo of her tits and say come and get me and she would be inundated. But that’s the way it should be.
I disagree with your point about it being on looks, effort and attitude get you a long long way. "
Effort and attitude can only get you so far if you are reasonable attractive, the reason men get frustrated is cause it’s a looks based site and that is out of their hands, cause women can afford to be picky. If you’re hot you get a free pass. |
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It is good to just blame yourself for everything. It saves so much time according blame, making hit-lists and falling out with people you've never even met. Those confrontations with my own failings tend to run along these lines.
"My fault" said me.
"You're forgiven." says me in reply.
"That's fine then" I mumble to myself "Why don't I take a year or two to re-group, try to gather my strength and rally the spirit for another go?"
"That's a great idea." I say "But let's not rush things." |
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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago
Chippenham Malmesbury area |
No blame culture. I agree OP that I could try harder at times to achieve what I joined fab for (to meet and play) but I've become content with the'pace' that has naturally be found; that being two to three meets a year.
If I want more (and I often do), I go to a club. If I don't get want I want from this site I don't think to cast blame I just either accept it or body swerve it. No room for blame and no sense in bashing your head against a brick walk. |
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