FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Is it ok to lie
Is it ok to lie
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Is it ok to lie about where you live, if you have kids, if you've ever been married, where you work, who else you have fucked in the past?
When does your desire for privacy overrule their need to know details that you don't want to reveal?
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
Why lie about it? Why not just say it’s something you don’t wish to discuss.
I don’t like being lied to. It’s sneaky and it says a lot about a person.
Tell the truth and shame the devil is what my nan used to say. You always get found out and then shit hits the fan, feelings get hurt etc. Not worth it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t lie, I just don’t divulge information that isn’t needed. If someone continues to pursue that line of conversation, it’s a red flag.
There must be journalists here too. So why tell strangers personal details. |
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"Is it ok to lie about where you live, if you have kids, if you've ever been married, where you work, who else you have fucked in the past?
When does your desire for privacy overrule their need to know details that you don't want to reveal?
"
“Where about are you based?”
“North London”
“Me too!!! What part?”
“It’s doesnt matter what part as I don’t accommodate”.
As I don’t accommodate I don’t feel the need to give out my exact location. I also don’t accept offers from those offering to pick me up and drop me off. I know it’s mostly all innocent but I wish to stay very private from the get go. I’ve had swinging friends that have eventually known where I live but that’s after becoming regulars and me trusting that they’re not nut jobs haha. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it ok to lie about where you live, if you have kids, if you've ever been married, where you work, who else you have fucked in the past?
When does your desire for privacy overrule their need to know details that you don't want to reveal?
“Where about are you based?”
“North London”
“Me too!!! What part?”
“It’s doesnt matter what part as I don’t accommodate”.
As I don’t accommodate I don’t feel the need to give out my exact location. I also don’t accept offers from those offering to pick me up and drop me off. I know it’s mostly all innocent but I wish to stay very private from the get go. I’ve had swinging friends that have eventually known where I live but that’s after becoming regulars and me trusting that they’re not nut jobs haha."
After reading a thread about a woman who put herself in a risky situation in a taxi with someone she met online, I think that's wise. I rarely accommodate and never until I have screened someone. So questions about exactly where I live are deflected. I don't lie as such. |
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By *ky19Man
over a year ago
Plymouth |
"Is it ok to lie about where you live, if you have kids, if you've ever been married, where you work, who else you have fucked in the past?
When does your desire for privacy overrule their need to know details that you don't want to reveal?
"
In this case I think it's more than ok not to tell everything to someone you just met or don't know well. I would just say I don't really want to reveal everything about myself right now, but if they get really pushy I would resort to lying, or rather not being specific with the truth. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I guess I do a bit. Or I just don’t give much info. Especially on here. Out of all the people I speak to on here only 3 people know my real name and what I do for a living and that’s only because I trust them completely. I used to be more open but due to a bad experience I am more wary. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it ok to lie about where you live, if you have kids, if you've ever been married, where you work, who else you have fucked in the past?
When does your desire for privacy overrule their need to know details that you don't want to reveal?
"
I don't think I'd lie, I think I'd just say "I'd prefer to keep that private at the moment". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If we’re talking about in the context of Fab.
As long as the personal information you decline to reveal or lie about doesn’t affect anyone or compromise others beliefs then I don’t see the problem.
I personally think people reveal waaaay to much personal information on the forums and to those they meet. People can do all sorts of nasty stuff with that kind of data. |
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"Why lie about it? Why not just say it’s something you don’t wish to discuss.
I don’t like being lied to. It’s sneaky and it says a lot about a person.
Tell the truth and shame the devil is what my nan used to say. You always get found out and then shit hits the fan, feelings get hurt etc. Not worth it."
Yup, just say 'Sorry I want to keep that private '. |
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"Is it ok to lie about where you live, if you have kids, if you've ever been married, where you work, who else you have fucked in the past?
When does your desire for privacy overrule their need to know details that you don't want to reveal?
"
Any question asked I don't think is anyone's business, I simply say, variations off, what's that to you? |
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Yes it's OK to lie about these things. It's OK to lie about a lot of things up to and including your personal opinion on certain things. Lying is vastly underrated as a social tool.
There are things that it's never OK to lie about though but people have varying ideas of what they are. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The only thing I think might be relevant to a fab meet is that I have stretch marks from being a momma, other than that I like my privacy."
Why would that be relevant to them? Your tiger stripes are yours to be proud of. None of their business.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If we’re talking about in the context of Fab.
As long as the personal information you decline to reveal or lie about doesn’t affect anyone or compromise others beliefs then I don’t see the problem.
I personally think people reveal waaaay to much personal information on the forums and to those they meet. People can do all sorts of nasty stuff with that kind of data."
Yes on here but also at socials. If every question they ask, I say "I don't want to answer", they'd be pissed off. Face to face is more difficult to deal with such questions than in mails. Or it is to me. |
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By *andonmessMan
over a year ago
A world all of his own |
"Why lie about it? Why not just say it’s something you don’t wish to discuss.
I don’t like being lied to. It’s sneaky and it says a lot about a person.
Tell the truth and shame the devil is what my nan used to say. You always get found out and then shit hits the fan, feelings get hurt etc. Not worth it."
Couldn't have put it better myself.
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"If we’re talking about in the context of Fab.
As long as the personal information you decline to reveal or lie about doesn’t affect anyone or compromise others beliefs then I don’t see the problem.
I personally think people reveal waaaay to much personal information on the forums and to those they meet. People can do all sorts of nasty stuff with that kind of data.
Yes on here but also at socials. If every question they ask, I say "I don't want to answer", they'd be pissed off. Face to face is more difficult to deal with such questions than in mails. Or it is to me. "
I don't mind telling people I was married for 20 years etc, but there's lots of ways to deflect questions that impinge on your privacy - you can smirk and say 'Never you mind young man ' or say something silly like 'I could tell you but I would have to kill you after....'
ie it doesn't have to become a downer. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If we’re talking about in the context of Fab.
As long as the personal information you decline to reveal or lie about doesn’t affect anyone or compromise others beliefs then I don’t see the problem.
I personally think people reveal waaaay to much personal information on the forums and to those they meet. People can do all sorts of nasty stuff with that kind of data.
Yes on here but also at socials. If every question they ask, I say "I don't want to answer", they'd be pissed off. Face to face is more difficult to deal with such questions than in mails. Or it is to me.
I don't mind telling people I was married for 20 years etc, but there's lots of ways to deflect questions that impinge on your privacy - you can smirk and say 'Never you mind young man ' or say something silly like 'I could tell you but I would have to kill you after....'
ie it doesn't have to become a downer."
That might work. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s perfectly alright to lie about where you live if you want to be discreet.
If your single like me and don’t give a toss what people think, then go ahead and let the world know what a horny bugger you are.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No need to lie about any of those things & lying never makes anyone a good person! But you can easily be honest on here and just say that it doesn't matter or I'm not divulging personal information! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't lie about where I live. I explain that i dont want them to know. Most understand. Even those I've met regularly still don't know exactly where I live. II prefer to keep this and my family home completely separate.
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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago
.. |
Ask me no secrets and I’ll tell you no lies. Sometimes people are too nosey and too persistent in trying to find out details. If they didn’t do that then perhaps people wouldn’t feel a need to lie. I would lie about details if I felt it was necessary. I’m not accountable to anyone on here and I’ll protect my privacy in a way that suits me  |
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One of the good things about fab is the fact tat you don’t need to divulge any personal information if you don’t want to .
So yes you can lie or you can choose to say you don’t want to talk about personal stuff .
It shouldn’t really matter . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One of the good things about fab is the fact tat you don’t need to divulge any personal information if you don’t want to .
So yes you can lie or you can choose to say you don’t want to talk about personal stuff .
It shouldn’t really matter ."
Yep exactly this. Those I meet know I won't divulge anything unless I want to so they don't ask anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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And I see nothing wrong in lying to people that contact me via here. They aren't ever going to enter my private life so it's irrelevant to them whether I'm truthful or not. |
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"The only thing I think might be relevant to a fab meet is that I have stretch marks from being a momma, other than that I like my privacy.
Why would that be relevant to them? Your tiger stripes are yours to be proud of. None of their business. "
I suppose I'd rather be open about them as to some it's an issue.
Don't get me wrong I'm totally comfortable in my own skin, tiger stripes and all
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it ok to lie about where you live, if you have kids, if you've ever been married, where you work, who else you have fucked in the past?
When does your desire for privacy overrule their need to know details that you don't want to reveal?
"
Ask me no questions, I’ll tell you no lies  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The only thing I think might be relevant to a fab meet is that I have stretch marks from being a momma, other than that I like my privacy.
Why would that be relevant to them? Your tiger stripes are yours to be proud of. None of their business.
I suppose I'd rather be open about them as to some it's an issue.
Don't get me wrong I'm totally comfortable in my own skin, tiger stripes and all
"
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There's lying then there is moving away from the facts because quite simply it's nobodies business until they are ready to divulge "
Moving away from the facts. I like that. |
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I think particularly in the context of a social I'd be a bit miffed if I later found out someone had lied about all sorts of things. And I wouldn't want to meet them again as I'd be wondering what else they'd lied about.
Some of the examples you gave OP you can answer in vague terms, like where you live, and if people are pushy about specifics at least you are on alert. Others you can simply decline to answer. I've told more than one person on here that I'd rather not tell them who I work for. Rather than being a closed book you can divert the question and tell them something you are comfortable with along similar lines instead. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everyone lies. I doubt anyone on this thread has their real name on their profile for instance."
I do! Lol but it's not what I'm called in outside of fab life  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Everyone lies. I doubt anyone on this thread has their real name on their profile for instance.
I do! Lol but it's not what I'm called in outside of fab life "
Pornwall is a lovely name. Unusual. |
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"Is it ok to lie about where you live, if you have kids, if you've ever been married, where you work, who else you have fucked in the past?
When does your desire for privacy overrule their need to know details that you don't want to reveal?
"
Your need for privacy ALWAYS over rides their need to know.
There is no need to lie though.
Someone new to me : Where do you live ?
Me: Liverpool.
Someone new to me:Do you have children ?
Me: Do you ? Did you see the weather this morning ?
Someone new to me : Who have you fucked in the past ?
Me: I don't discuss my sex life or relationships with strangers.
And if they insist on repeating the Q's If you've a problem with that you have some choices to make.
All politely of course.
Get off the back foot and take the lead. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is it ok to lie about where you live, if you have kids, if you've ever been married, where you work, who else you have fucked in the past?
When does your desire for privacy overrule their need to know details that you don't want to reveal?
Your need for privacy ALWAYS over rides their need to know.
There is no need to lie though.
Someone new to me : Where do you live ?
Me: Liverpool.
Someone new to me:Do you have children ?
Me: Do you ? Did you see the weather this morning ?
Someone new to me : Who have you fucked in the past ?
Me: I don't discuss my sex life or relationships with strangers.
And if they insist on repeating the Q's If you've a problem with that you have some choices to make.
All politely of course.
Get off the back foot and take the lead. "
You're ace Granny. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"If we’re talking about in the context of Fab.
As long as the personal information you decline to reveal or lie about doesn’t affect anyone or compromise others beliefs then I don’t see the problem.
I personally think people reveal waaaay to much personal information on the forums and to those they meet. People can do all sorts of nasty stuff with that kind of data.
Yes on here but also at socials. If every question they ask, I say "I don't want to answer", they'd be pissed off. Face to face is more difficult to deal with such questions than in mails. Or it is to me.
I don't mind telling people I was married for 20 years etc, but there's lots of ways to deflect questions that impinge on your privacy - you can smirk and say 'Never you mind young man ' or say something silly like 'I could tell you but I would have to kill you after....'
ie it doesn't have to become a downer.
That might work. "
Just remember to not get to the point of having to kill them.
In all the years we've known each other you know I'm in London and I know you're oop North. It's not stopped us communicating well.
I don't even share my first name on Fab and only a handful of Fab people know it. I learnt the hard way.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If we’re talking about in the context of Fab.
As long as the personal information you decline to reveal or lie about doesn’t affect anyone or compromise others beliefs then I don’t see the problem.
I personally think people reveal waaaay to much personal information on the forums and to those they meet. People can do all sorts of nasty stuff with that kind of data.
Yes on here but also at socials. If every question they ask, I say "I don't want to answer", they'd be pissed off. Face to face is more difficult to deal with such questions than in mails. Or it is to me.
I don't mind telling people I was married for 20 years etc, but there's lots of ways to deflect questions that impinge on your privacy - you can smirk and say 'Never you mind young man ' or say something silly like 'I could tell you but I would have to kill you after....'
ie it doesn't have to become a downer.
That might work.
Just remember to not get to the point of having to kill them.
In all the years we've known each other you know I'm in London and I know you're oop North. It's not stopped us communicating well.
I don't even share my first name on Fab and only a handful of Fab people know it. I learnt the hard way.
"
Good point, maybe it's a shared understanding.
Glad to see you back. |
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