FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Is there no such thing as an innocent status update?
Is there no such thing as an innocent status update?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Or is it just because we’re on this site everything has to have sexual undertones?
I’ve used my status updates many times over the years, from having a nice gentleman deliver to my friend and I two chicken ball deals from the Chinese. Was able to borrow a strimmer last summer off another chap, even a telescopic ladder a couple of years ago when I was papering on top of my stairs. But those things weren’t without requests of blow jobs or sexual favours.
The guys that did lend me their tools did so cos they were local and just said I could borrow them, no funny business. Tidy guys. But now this morning I’m off work, all my friends are in work, have no one to go to the cafe with so suggested a breakfast buddy a cooked breakfast meet, and again with the sexual undertones. It makes me sad. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Id have happily met you for a fry OP, no sex meet requested or needed afterwards just food and a chat. Chances are I'd spent the whole time looking at your hooves though lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve removed my status now.
Too many people asking for sex with it. Was just looking for someone to come to the cafe with me. "
The ulterior motive on here is sex. I stopped doing social because so many men expected a grope under the table or a blow job on the way back to the station.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
"
Many people have hidden agenda’s when it comes to “helping out”. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
"
Well three men did so there are some guys that will do things just for the sake of helping someone. The previous stuff I can understand, not many people will do something for nothing but to expect sex when someone just said anyone want to come to the cafe for a cooked breakfast, how can that be turned into wanting sex? I’d pay for my own breakfast, it’s only £3.95 for a big boy and that’s 2 sausage 2 bacon 2 eggs beans mushrooms fried potatoes and fried bread and toast. |
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By *tirluvMan
over a year ago
the right frame of mind -London |
Op -if I am understanding things right, you are upset that guys are making sexual advances to you on a swingers site when all you want is to borrow things in a platonic way? Do you experience similar levels of platonic frustration when advertising items on Gumtree or Freecycle perchance? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
Well three men did so there are some guys that will do things just for the sake of helping someone. The previous stuff I can understand, not many people will do something for nothing but to expect sex when someone just said anyone want to come to the cafe for a cooked breakfast, how can that be turned into wanting sex? I’d pay for my own breakfast, it’s only £3.95 for a big boy and that’s 2 sausage 2 bacon 2 eggs beans mushrooms fried potatoes and fried bread and toast. "
But you’re asking this on a site where people meet for sex, so there will always be men who want something afterwards or assume it’s going to lead to sex.
Ask the same questions on Facebook and I can guarantee you’re far less likely to be asked for sex. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Op -if I am understanding things right, you are upset that guys are making sexual advances to you on a swingers site when all you want is to borrow things in a platonic way? Do you experience similar levels of platonic frustration when advertising items on Gumtree or Freecycle perchance?"
No. The previous is irrelevant. Let’s concentrate on the current issue. The breakfast companion.
I don’t even want a breakfast now I’ve had weetabix but it’s not the point. |
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"To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
Well three men did so there are some guys that will do things just for the sake of helping someone. The previous stuff I can understand, not many people will do something for nothing but to expect sex when someone just said anyone want to come to the cafe for a cooked breakfast, how can that be turned into wanting sex? I’d pay for my own breakfast, it’s only £3.95 for a big boy and that’s 2 sausage 2 bacon 2 eggs beans mushrooms fried potatoes and fried bread and toast. "
Just £3.95 for a Big Boy? ...now expect a flurry of TV's messaging you to find out which cafe you frequent! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
Well three men did so there are some guys that will do things just for the sake of helping someone. The previous stuff I can understand, not many people will do something for nothing but to expect sex when someone just said anyone want to come to the cafe for a cooked breakfast, how can that be turned into wanting sex? I’d pay for my own breakfast, it’s only £3.95 for a big boy and that’s 2 sausage 2 bacon 2 eggs beans mushrooms fried potatoes and fried bread and toast. "
I suspect they hoped that something more would come from helping you.
The having breakfast together is more of a social though, and who doesn't like a breakfast?
That's really cheap too.
It's the same with anything on here though; you sift through what you don't want, to find what you do want. |
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"To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
Well three men did so there are some guys that will do things just for the sake of helping someone. The previous stuff I can understand, not many people will do something for nothing but to expect sex when someone just said anyone want to come to the cafe for a cooked breakfast, how can that be turned into wanting sex? "
Because you are asking on a sex site with your boobs out! Even the ones who don't ask for sex are probably still hoping they might get it.....I do put up innocent status updates, which invite comment as such, but not asking for stuff. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
Sounds like a great breakfast to be fair. I have agree to a certain extent that a lot of the time there is a sense of entitlement with anything social. I've experienced this side myself. However, I have quite a few fab friends that have become good friends off here do I can work. One came over for dinner yesterday and fixed my laptop for me. No sexual undertones, just friends. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sounds like a great breakfast to be fair. I have agree to a certain extent that a lot of the time there is a sense of entitlement with anything social. I've experienced this side myself. However, I have quite a few fab friends that have become good friends off here do I can work. One came over for dinner yesterday and fixed my laptop for me. No sexual undertones, just friends. "
I have friends of the family who do each other favours, but we have known each other for years.
There are very few people in the world who do something for nothing.
You have to catch them at the right time and place. |
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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago
Chippenham Malmesbury area |
"Or is it just because we’re on this site everything has to have sexual undertones?
I’ve used my status updates many times over the years, from having a nice gentleman deliver to my friend and I two chicken ball deals from the Chinese. Was able to borrow a strimmer last summer off another chap, even a telescopic ladder a couple of years ago when I was papering on top of my stairs. But those things weren’t without requests of blow jobs or sexual favours.
The guys that did lend me their tools did so cos they were local and just said I could borrow them, no funny business. Tidy guys. But now this morning I’m off work, all my friends are in work, have no one to go to the cafe with so suggested a breakfast buddy a cooked breakfast meet, and again with the sexual undertones. It makes me sad. "
I feel this way too sometimes, just want someone to talk to and spend time with; I wouldn't be looking for it to lead to something more; I would of course be flirty and I'd be looking to chat about the swinging life style as I can't do this with my non fab friends. |
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I put a status up about having been for a nice walk in the woods. We got loads of messages about dogging. Mr N said I was naive to think that people would take it at face value given the site we're on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You could try the old "christ I forgot the mot was due last week, got to walk to work and I've got a stinking cold "
You might get a proposition based on that but I doubt it !
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I read a status update, or a post,....I do t care how innocent it is, I bet I can turn it into an innuendo or flirting opportunity if I wanted to. 
But, i don’t see why everything on here has to have a sexual agenda attached. I’ve said it before, socialising is great, sex is great too but not everyone wants both with me. I’m alright with that because I don’t need both with everyone either. |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"I put a status up about having been for a nice walk in the woods. We got loads of messages about dogging. Mr N said I was naive to think that people would take it at face value given the site we're on. "
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
"You could try the old "christ I forgot the mot was due last week, got to walk to work and I've got a stinking cold "
You might get a proposition based on that but I doubt it !
"
You would.
Someone asked to meet me and i was full up with a cold at the time, he said “that’s alright, you can wank me off”.
You could be at deaths door and some folk would still demand you give them a blow job before you peg it. No compassion!!
Sometimes you just want to slap them silly with a wet fish.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I read a status update, or a post,....I do t care how innocent it is, I bet I can turn it into an innuendo or flirting opportunity if I wanted to.
But, i don’t see why everything on here has to have a sexual agenda attached. I’ve said it before, socialising is great, sex is great too but not everyone wants both with me. I’m alright with that because I don’t need both with everyone either. "
I agree with this. The main agenda for the site is sex. Plain and simple, so first thought is generally sex related.
However the social aspect is also important, it could be a much better community if people were not always so offensive/defensive/offended by everything. There is nothing wrong with asking/requesting something that is totally unrelated to sex, but it is a place that will also come with those who take every opportunity to make it about sex.
I guess I'm a rare weird one but I'd happily help out or meet up for nothing more than a breakfast and a chat about random shit in life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve removed my status now.
Too many people asking for sex with it. Was just looking for someone to come to the cafe with me.
The ulterior motive on here is sex. I stopped doing social because so many men expected a grope under the table or a blow job on the way back to the station.
"
Judging by this and your previous post, seems to me you're meeting the wrong types of men!  .
Gentleman still exist even though they're on a sex based site. I've had plenty of socials. During those socials, not one tried to grope me or ask for a bj. I've even had a couple of socials in the man's home. Still they tried nothing sexual.
OP, I agree. It's sad when some men see a lady needing genuine help and view it as an opportunity to get sexual favours! Shame on them! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve removed my status now.
Too many people asking for sex with it. Was just looking for someone to come to the cafe with me. "
well without meaning no offence your gorgeous..but a coffe would be great ..but we are pretty far. |
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"To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
"
I would imagine it's the same type of people who would help a stranger out in the real world. Some of us aren't out for whatever we can get and are actually nice people. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You could try the old "christ I forgot the mot was due last week, got to walk to work and I've got a stinking cold "
You might get a proposition based on that but I doubt it !
You would.
Someone asked to meet me and i was full up with a cold at the time, he said “that’s alright, you can wank me off”.
You could be at deaths door and some folk would still demand you give them a blow job before you peg it. No compassion!!
Sometimes you just want to slap them silly with a wet fish.
"
Or 'you dont have to do anything, just lie there' (on feeling ill)   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Op. I’ve put an innocent status update up. I’ll let you know if there’s any difference in reactions when a male puts something on asking for help. "
I took my update off now as I’ve been inundated with offers for coffee. That’s my next 3 weeks booked up. Thanks for the idea op. |
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"Or is it just because we’re on this site everything has to have sexual undertones?
I’ve used my status updates many times over the years, from having a nice gentleman deliver to my friend and I two chicken ball deals from the Chinese. Was able to borrow a strimmer last summer off another chap, even a telescopic ladder a couple of years ago when I was papering on top of my stairs. But those things weren’t without requests of blow jobs or sexual favours.
The guys that did lend me their tools did so cos they were local and just said I could borrow them, no funny business. Tidy guys. But now this morning I’m off work, all my friends are in work, have no one to go to the cafe with so suggested a breakfast buddy a cooked breakfast meet, and again with the sexual undertones. It makes me sad. "
I know it's sad times, there's more to life than sex, if I had been around the corner I would have gone to breakfast with you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
I would imagine it's the same type of people who would help a stranger out in the real world. Some of us aren't out for whatever we can get and are actually nice people."
I'm very cynical; especially on here, and as Hooves has pointed out, there aren't many on here.
I suspect most people would have been at work though. |
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"To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
Well three men did so there are some guys that will do things just for the sake of helping someone. The previous stuff I can understand, not many people will do something for nothing but to expect sex when someone just said anyone want to come to the cafe for a cooked breakfast, how can that be turned into wanting sex? I’d pay for my own breakfast, it’s only £3.95 for a big boy and that’s 2 sausage 2 bacon 2 eggs beans mushrooms fried potatoes and fried bread and toast.
But you’re asking this on a site where people meet for sex, so there will always be men who want something afterwards or assume it’s going to lead to sex.
Ask the same questions on Facebook and I can guarantee you’re far less likely to be asked for sex. "
I disagree there are 1 or 2 gents out there that don't mind helping out without just expecting sexual favours even tho it's a sex site, I'd be happy with the company and maybe even a home cooked dinner and the pudding would optional |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Op. I’ve put an innocent status update up. I’ll let you know if there’s any difference in reactions when a male puts something on asking for help.
I took my update off now as I’ve been inundated with offers for coffee. That’s my next 3 weeks booked up. Thanks for the idea op. "
What did it say? I want to try. |
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I've had help off here for no reason at all, i put things like 'if someones passing and doesn'tmind helping me with'.
But yeah a lot do offer to help expecting sex in return. I guess they hope i will offer sex or a bj but i don't. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Op. I’ve put an innocent status update up. I’ll let you know if there’s any difference in reactions when a male puts something on asking for help.
I took my update off now as I’ve been inundated with offers for coffee. That’s my next 3 weeks booked up. Thanks for the idea op.
What did it say? I want to try. "
Anyone like to buy me coffee? ...and I’m still replying to the offers.
Thanks everyone, you know who you are.
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"To be honest, I don't think you should be asking for free deliveries or help with whatever via your status.
I would expect most people to assume it's a favour in return for something sexual.
What person would want to go out of their way to help a stranger on a sex site; especially just to deliver food or to lend something, without expecting anything back at all.
Well three men did so there are some guys that will do things just for the sake of helping someone. The previous stuff I can understand, not many people will do something for nothing but to expect sex when someone just said anyone want to come to the cafe for a cooked breakfast, how can that be turned into wanting sex? I’d pay for my own breakfast, it’s only £3.95 for a big boy and that’s 2 sausage 2 bacon 2 eggs beans mushrooms fried potatoes and fried bread and toast.
But you’re asking this on a site where people meet for sex, so there will always be men who want something afterwards or assume it’s going to lead to sex.
Ask the same questions on Facebook and I can guarantee you’re far less likely to be asked for sex.
I disagree there are 1 or 2 gents out there that don't mind helping out without just expecting sexual favours even tho it's a sex site, I'd be happy with the company and maybe even a home cooked dinner and the pudding would optional "
This is what i did with my friend who fixed my laptop, fixed, nice company and a shared meal cooked by me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Op. I’ve put an innocent status update up. I’ll let you know if there’s any difference in reactions when a male puts something on asking for help.
I took my update off now as I’ve been inundated with offers for coffee. That’s my next 3 weeks booked up. Thanks for the idea op.
What did it say? I want to try.
Anyone like to buy me coffee? ...and I’m still replying to the offers.
Thanks everyone, you know who you are.
"
I've had no offers. |
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