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Bullying

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By *tella Heels OP   TV/TS  over a year ago

west here ford shire

Is there a clique set of people on the forums who cannot we cannot be controversial with?

If you cross that line do you find there are agressive people in the forums who cannot wait to rip into some threads?

I find as a tv and recent severe illness there are some people on here, that can be quite agressive and nasty, shame as this is a very small minority which can spoil threads and posters..

please try and be honest and objective in your responses

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is there a clique set of people on the forums who cannot we cannot be controversial with?

If you cross that line do you find there are agressive people in the forums who cannot wait to rip into some threads?

I find as a tv and recent severe illness there are some people on here, that can be quite agressive and nasty, shame as this is a very small minority which can spoil threads and posters..

please try and be honest and objective in your responses

"

Just be who you are.

By definition a clique will be a minority so youll always have numbers on your side if your outside of it.

But if you want true objectivity id say the "woe is me" approach never gets a good reaction from strangers with zero emotional investment in you as a person.

In forums strength and conviction in yourself usualy comes across best as it makes you entertaining and robust.

But these threads have been going on since forums began they never go anywhere because people refuse to name the nebulous "clique".

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yes. No. Maybe. We all see things differently. Some people will post aggressively, and I noticed that by not being a Tv or having an illness. Just recently I was told someone likes to post against the norm and in a not such polite manner. He certainly believes he’s not in a clique. So even if there was one. (There probably is) it’s nit just those that can be aggressive in posting. Just my opinion, it means nothing.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is there a clique set of people on the forums who cannot we cannot be controversial with?

If you cross that line do you find there are agressive people in the forums who cannot wait to rip into some threads?

I find as a tv and recent severe illness there are some people on here, that can be quite agressive and nasty, shame as this is a very small minority which can spoil threads and posters..

please try and be honest and objective in your responses

"

I don’t think people will be deliberately nasty to you because you have been ill and/or a TV.

I don’t think there’s a clique. If you went into a pub, who are you more likely to go and speak to? Your friends, or strangers? I think it’s the case on here too.

I just avoid those who make little digs or who don’t seem to have anything positive to say to me. If they respond to me with something, I’ll just ignore. They’ll get bored

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm not sure there is necessarily a clique of people that do this.

There are definitely one or two individuals who will deliberately be very controversial or aggravating on a thread. With these individuals you can pretty much guarantee which threads they're going to pop up on to.

I tend to ignore it although sometimes I will challenge rude or bad attitudes but I try and do it in as a respectful way as possible without getting personal.

It is ok to disagree with people. but as my mum always used to say "it's not what you say, it's how you say it".

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure there is necessarily a clique of people that do this.

There are definitely one or two individuals who will deliberately be very controversial or aggravating on a thread. With these individuals you can pretty much guarantee which threads they're going to pop up on to.

I tend to ignore it although sometimes I will challenge rude or bad attitudes but I try and do it in as a respectful way as possible without getting personal.

It is ok to disagree with people. but as my mum always used to say "it's not what you say, it's how you say it"."

Seems like youre saying this in a very passive aggressive way instead of a constructive way

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure there is necessarily a clique of people that do this.

There are definitely one or two individuals who will deliberately be very controversial or aggravating on a thread. With these individuals you can pretty much guarantee which threads they're going to pop up on to.

I tend to ignore it although sometimes I will challenge rude or bad attitudes but I try and do it in as a respectful way as possible without getting personal.

It is ok to disagree with people. but as my mum always used to say "it's not what you say, it's how you say it".

Seems like youre saying this in a very passive aggressive way instead of a constructive way

"

I've no idea what you're talking about there is nothing passive-aggressive about that!

So what are you saying I shouldn't challenge people's bad attitudes! I don't understand what you mean.

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By *tella Heels OP   TV/TS  over a year ago

west here ford shire


"Is there a clique set of people on the forums who cannot we cannot be controversial with?

If you cross that line do you find there are agressive people in the forums who cannot wait to rip into some threads?

I find as a tv and recent severe illness there are some people on here, that can be quite agressive and nasty, shame as this is a very small minority which can spoil threads and posters..

please try and be honest and objective in your responses

Just be who you are.

By definition a clique will be a minority so youll always have numbers on your side if your outside of it.

But if you want true objectivity id say the "woe is me" approach never gets a good reaction from strangers with zero emotional investment in you as a person.

In forums strength and conviction in yourself usualy comes across best as it makes you entertaining and robust.

But these threads have been going on since forums began they never go anywhere because people refuse to name the nebulous "clique".

"

Woe is me???

I’m not crying or anything it’s just a point of view

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By *tella Heels OP   TV/TS  over a year ago

west here ford shire


"Yes. No. Maybe. We all see things differently. Some people will post aggressively, and I noticed that by not being a Tv or having an illness. Just recently I was told someone likes to post against the norm and in a not such polite manner. He certainly believes he’s not in a clique. So even if there was one. (There probably is) it’s nit just those that can be aggressive in posting. Just my opinion, it means nothing. "

Appreciated

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By *andare63Man  over a year ago

oldham


"Is there a clique set of people on the forums who cannot we cannot be controversial with?

If you cross that line do you find there are agressive people in the forums who cannot wait to rip into some threads?

I find as a tv and recent severe illness there are some people on here, that can be quite agressive and nasty, shame as this is a very small minority which can spoil threads and posters..

please try and be honest and objective in your responses

Just be who you are.

By definition a clique will be a minority so youll always have numbers on your side if your outside of it.

But if you want true objectivity id say the "woe is me" approach never gets a good reaction from strangers with zero emotional investment in you as a person.

In forums strength and conviction in yourself usualy comes across best as it makes you entertaining and robust.

But these threads have been going on since forums began they never go anywhere because people refuse to name the nebulous "clique".

"

Very eloquently put and so true .

Never crumble to the insecurities of the few

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure there is necessarily a clique of people that do this.

There are definitely one or two individuals who will deliberately be very controversial or aggravating on a thread. With these individuals you can pretty much guarantee which threads they're going to pop up on to.

I tend to ignore it although sometimes I will challenge rude or bad attitudes but I try and do it in as a respectful way as possible without getting personal.

It is ok to disagree with people. but as my mum always used to say "it's not what you say, it's how you say it".

Seems like youre saying this in a very passive aggressive way instead of a constructive way

I've no idea what you're talking about there is nothing passive-aggressive about that!

So what are you saying I shouldn't challenge people's bad attitudes! I don't understand what you mean."

Your first two paragraphs are totaly passive aggressive followed by a bit of virtue signalling.

You backed that up by going straight to "So what are you saying I shouldn't challenge people's bad attitudes! "

Did we learn nothing from Cathy Newman and how the "so what your saying" trope just doesnt work?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is there a clique set of people on the forums who cannot we cannot be controversial with?

If you cross that line do you find there are agressive people in the forums who cannot wait to rip into some threads?

I find as a tv and recent severe illness there are some people on here, that can be quite agressive and nasty, shame as this is a very small minority which can spoil threads and posters..

please try and be honest and objective in your responses

"

Unfortunately, in life as a whole there's cliques and nasty people, and those with that temperament tend to be worse online as it is perceived as "anonymous".

Rise above them.

They used to bother me, but not any more, I'm as entitled to be here as anyone else as are you ...

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By *tella Heels OP   TV/TS  over a year ago

west here ford shire


"Is there a clique set of people on the forums who cannot we cannot be controversial with?

If you cross that line do you find there are agressive people in the forums who cannot wait to rip into some threads?

I find as a tv and recent severe illness there are some people on here, that can be quite agressive and nasty, shame as this is a very small minority which can spoil threads and posters..

please try and be honest and objective in your responses

Just be who you are.

By definition a clique will be a minority so youll always have numbers on your side if your outside of it.

But if you want true objectivity id say the "woe is me" approach never gets a good reaction from strangers with zero emotional investment in you as a person.

In forums strength and conviction in yourself usualy comes across best as it makes you entertaining and robust.

But these threads have been going on since forums began they never go anywhere because people refuse to name the nebulous "clique".

Very eloquently put and so true .

Never crumble to the insecurities of the few "

Never crumble to the insecurities of the few?

Shouldn’t that be never crumble to those who’s aim is to hurt and aggravate? These are never insecure !

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The pack mentality is rife.

Some will get away with murder on here because of their popularity. Others will tag on in the hope of being in the in crowd.

If you are feeling a little low though, it can seem that others are deliberately being antagonistic. There are some members on here who will go out of their way to show themselves to be ultra straight and will comment on posts for the sake of it.

We all have opinions and we live in a country where we are permitted to voice opinions. Where things go wrong is when people are a cunt about it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yeh bullying is bad

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By *tella Heels OP   TV/TS  over a year ago

west here ford shire


"The pack mentality is rife.

Some will get away with murder on here because of their popularity. Others will tag on in the hope of being in the in crowd.

If you are feeling a little low though, it can seem that others are deliberately being antagonistic. There are some members on here who will go out of their way to show themselves to be ultra straight and will comment on posts for the sake of it.

We all have opinions and we live in a country where we are permitted to voice opinions. Where things go wrong is when people are a cunt about it."

Well said

I have noticed this too

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By *abs..Woman  over a year ago

..

There isn’t a clique.

I think any public forums with encourage those with strong opinions, argumentative natures and ugly personalities as much as the opposite to those things. It’s life unfortunately.

I’m not nasty or aggressive and I avoid people like that because it’s if no interest to me.

As for bullying. Well that is very much an overused term I think.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is

Woe is me???

I’m not crying or anything it’s just a point of view "

Well you instantly went to it being because youre ill pretty much no one is going to know that youre ill.

You even titled the thread bullying so you are comming across very much as you see yourself as a personal victim.

It does read a bit woe is me which puts the onus on others not yourself.

The way this forum is set up (no signatures and for many disabled avatars) posts tend to be very individual with no past context, each one is read in isolation and on its own merit.

What you posted last week makes no difference today.

If people react negatively to your posting style you either have to accept this or change your style.

Theres no clique out there to force people to change the way they interact with you

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not sure there is necessarily a clique of people that do this.

There are definitely one or two individuals who will deliberately be very controversial or aggravating on a thread. With these individuals you can pretty much guarantee which threads they're going to pop up on to.

I tend to ignore it although sometimes I will challenge rude or bad attitudes but I try and do it in as a respectful way as possible without getting personal.

It is ok to disagree with people. but as my mum always used to say "it's not what you say, it's how you say it".

Seems like youre saying this in a very passive aggressive way instead of a constructive way

I've no idea what you're talking about there is nothing passive-aggressive about that!

So what are you saying I shouldn't challenge people's bad attitudes! I don't understand what you mean.

Your first two paragraphs are totaly passive aggressive followed by a bit of virtue signalling.

You backed that up by going straight to "So what are you saying I shouldn't challenge people's bad attitudes! "

Did we learn nothing from Cathy Newman and how the "so what your saying" trope just doesnt work?

"

I was trying to give my opinion and make what I thought was a valid point I do not appreciate my character being picked apart I was trying to be helpful and I'm sorry you didn't find it that way.

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By *HaRiFMan  over a year ago

Beyond the shadows.

Text can be a very hard form of communication. It very difficult to convey emotion, tone etc. So sometimes offense can be taken where none was ment, someone saying something in jest may not be taken ad such. Sometimes people can get heated over small things. But on the main I dont think its intentional.

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By *loswingersCouple  over a year ago

Gloucester


"Is there a clique set of people on the forums who cannot we cannot be controversial with?

If you cross that line do you find there are agressive people in the forums who cannot wait to rip into some threads?

I find as a tv and recent severe illness there are some people on here, that can be quite agressive and nasty, shame as this is a very small minority which can spoil threads and posters..

please try and be honest and objective in your responses

"

Having been on and off these forums for eight years now , I can see what you’re saying here .

However , the forums can be interpreted in very different ways depending on your mood at the time . When I was recovering from a heart attack a year ago I sensed so many posts were attacking me . That was because I was over sensitive at the time . As time moved on I realised it was me , and things settled down .

I do believe there are and have been some particularly obtuse posters over the years . And up until recently a couple of posters who have really wound me up , but I don’t think there’s a clique . Just a few posters who may have met , or who have developed friendships with each other and it feels like they may be constantly on each other’s side . And yes , that may seem cliquey but there’s nothing anyone can do about that .

The very same people who are aggressive on here are probably the type of people who wouldn’t say boo to a goose in the real world . I tend to feel a bit sorry for them and it’s water off a ducks back for me .

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

There are some people that are aggressive in their response to posts, and I tend to avoid them. I’m not here to argue and if they make snide comments I pass them by, not worth worrying myself over. X

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By *ensualbicockMan  over a year ago

liverpool wavertree picton clock

It's good to stir up shit from time to time, people then reveal their true colours

Jason Statham

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By *wisted999Man  over a year ago

North Bucks

How is your illness relevant to the question OP?

Have people been mentioning it when posting against you?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think most bullies aren't even aware they're doing it to be honest.

I see a few faces on here jumping down people's throats for very little reason. Taking their own attitude out on others.

Not just a trait reserved for new and inexperienced users either, unfortunately.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think most bullies aren't even aware they're doing it to be honest.

I see a few faces on here jumping down people's throats for very little reason. Taking their own attitude out on others.

Not just a trait reserved for new and inexperienced users either, unfortunately. "

I agree with this.

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By *anesjhCouple  over a year ago

LONDON.


"I think most bullies aren't even aware they're doing it to be honest.

I see a few faces on here jumping down people's throats for very little reason. Taking their own attitude out on others.

Not just a trait reserved for new and inexperienced users either, unfortunately. "

..

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By *andare63Man  over a year ago

oldham


"Is there a clique set of people on the forums who cannot we cannot be controversial with?

If you cross that line do you find there are agressive people in the forums who cannot wait to rip into some threads?

I find as a tv and recent severe illness there are some people on here, that can be quite agressive and nasty, shame as this is a very small minority which can spoil threads and posters..

please try and be honest and objective in your responses

Just be who you are.

By definition a clique will be a minority so youll always have numbers on your side if your outside of it.

But if you want true objectivity id say the "woe is me" approach never gets a good reaction from strangers with zero emotional investment in you as a person.

In forums strength and conviction in yourself usualy comes across best as it makes you entertaining and robust.

But these threads have been going on since forums began they never go anywhere because people refuse to name the nebulous "clique".

Very eloquently put and so true .

Never crumble to the insecurities of the few

Never crumble to the insecurities of the few?

Shouldn’t that be never crumble to those who’s aim is to hurt and aggravate? These are never insecure ! "

I know exactly what I meant . Bullies are the minority (the few). And my experience of bullies is of them being riddled with insecurities

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is there a clique set of people on the forums who cannot we cannot be controversial with?

If you cross that line do you find there are agressive people in the forums who cannot wait to rip into some threads?

I find as a tv and recent severe illness there are some people on here, that can be quite agressive and nasty, shame as this is a very small minority which can spoil threads and posters..

please try and be honest and objective in your responses

"

I’ve been back and forth on the forums for years and yes there is. There used to be one that constantly jumped on any post I made. She was an extremely nasty person. But majority of folks I find on here are lovely, sadly there will always be that one arsehole that ruins it for everyone.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bullying behaviours are pathetic and should have no place anywhere, especially when instigated by adults!

Just to be respectful, and understand that others view can differ from your own is hard for some. You can offer a viewpoint and debate in a grown up way. Lack of control, to me signifies lack of intelligence

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By *evil_u_knowMan  over a year ago

city

There are cliques yeah. I find that they combine to goad people into getting themselves banned more than anything.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Some people will always find a reason to try and belittle somebody or try and dismiss their point of view just because they have their own agenda.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why on earth would you worry about a bunch of random strangers on the internet who you're never going to meet?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Depends on the day with me if im on the man rag

But dunno about clique bollox tho

Folks have fun or dont as long as i get laid on occasion forum politics goes over my head

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By *wisted999Man  over a year ago

North Bucks


"Why on earth would you worry about a bunch of random strangers on the internet who you're never going to meet?"

I don’t understand why people take it to heart so much. The day you start giving less of a shit what people think things will get a lot better.

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Yes it does happen, yes it is against rules. Some people are oblivious to the fact that they are coming across that way too especially when it is dressed up as "banter"

All should be reported either way and it will be looked at.

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

PS to the OP I have never seen anything but positive thoughts on the forum about your illness so I am not sure what you are getting at there.

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