FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Are you a go getter?
Are you a go getter?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Do you sit and wait to attract people or are you more confident and upfront?
If you want to talk to someone on here or out in the real world, do you sit and wait in hope they come to you by fanning your tail feathers, Or are you more of a confident beast grabbing the bull by the horns and making the first move?
How confident are you at breaking the ice? |
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Life is too short to sit in the corner. I’m not quite so forward as to tip up to someone and ask them if they fancy a roll in the hay however I’d never shy of saying hello to someone who interests me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Life is too short to sit in the corner. I’m not quite so forward as to tip up to someone and ask them if they fancy a roll in the hay however I’d never shy of saying hello to someone who interests me. "
Fancy a roll in the hay?
I agree. I think most people are the same. Not overpowering but just enough to be friendly and outgoing.
I'm usually socially awkward but have bursts of confidence that I end up with attention on me. Then Realise and try to hide. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do op. I'll walk up to a stranger in the street and start a conversation quite happily! With potential meets though I'll either be upfront or a terrible tease, maybe even challenge them to wrestle like a schoolboy trying to get a girls attention 
Peach x
Maybe I'll try coy and shy for a bit.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ll go break the ice in the real world but never messaged anyone on here, I just reply to the messages I like, guess thats easier being female tho as we get lots to choose from x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On here I would talk to them. They can't see the look of distress on my face if I get rejected.
In the real world I would try make eye contact and just pray. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I will reply to all messages where possible and I will message and do if someone interests me usually through the forums quite likely to speak to people in public because they have caught my attention and I like to be cheeky .. If I waited then life would be dull and only the annoying would message me well nearly all. |
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I've not thought of 'go-getter' as a term I'd use to describe myself but I do initiate contact with people that I like in the real world. On fab, I do this less than respond to the interest shown to me as, generally, just keeping on top of my inbox is a job and a half.
It seems tough to recognise that there's a barrier that exists, of your own making, that you're not willing to at least take some steps to going beyond it. Any small step is generally better than taking no steps at all. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've not thought of 'go-getter' as a term I'd use to describe myself but I do initiate contact with people that I like in the real world. On fab, I do this less than respond to the interest shown to me as, generally, just keeping on top of my inbox is a job and a half.
It seems tough to recognise that there's a barrier that exists, of your own making, that you're not willing to at least take some steps to going beyond it. Any small step is generally better than taking no steps at all."
Stepping out of your comfort zone can be surprisingly rewarding.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On here I would go get. Eventually, after Id given it some thought 
Real life I would just long wistfully after them whilst imagining what we could get up to. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
I'd say that I'm proactive here, in the past I always let people know if I was attracted and my hotlist always were aware.
Ive rarely sent first messages cold though, off the back of threads, yes.
In real life? Yes, it's kind of expected of the guy to make the approach isn't it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If someone catches my attention I will be bold and message them or sometimes if I see them on the forums I might put a flirty reply to their comment
Both approaches have worked quite well
In the real world I have become more bold also
I was on a train a few months ago and a woman who was very easy on the eye and intelligent considering her reading material sat opposite me
I took the bull by the horns and asked, “ good book”?
Luckily it was on a subject I had some knowledge of and the conversation flowed
A Fab friend asked, “if I took her to the toilet for some hot train sex”?
I said, “ nah it was an Arriva train have you seen the state of their toilets”!!
Now if it was a Virgin train it could of been a different story  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'd say that I'm proactive here, in the past I always let people know if I was attracted and my hotlist always were aware.
Ive rarely sent first messages cold though, off the back of threads, yes.
In real life? Yes, it's kind of expected of the guy to make the approach isn't it? "
And this is maybe the reason why so many women recieve so many messages, men make the first move generally....it’s how we roll.  |
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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago
Hull |
After being on here a while I would now approach someone I liked which is a massive change for me. I don’t bother in the real world as I’m not really interested. Plus as someone said above, they can’t see my face when they reject me on here  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd say that I'm proactive here, in the past I always let people know if I was attracted and my hotlist always were aware.
Ive rarely sent first messages cold though, off the back of threads, yes.
In real life? Yes, it's kind of expected of the guy to make the approach isn't it?
And this is maybe the reason why so many women recieve so many messages, men make the first move generally....it’s how we roll. "
And thank goodness they do. |
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"On here I would talk to them. They can't see the look of distress on my face if I get rejected.
In the real world I would try make eye contact and just pray. "
On fab I often message guys who interest me! I simply ask them to take a look at my profile and message back if interested - couldn’t be simpler!
In the real world I’m a very average working mum! I assume no guy I’m attracted to could possibly be interested in me - so I kinda keep my head down! |
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By *r.BlondeMan
over a year ago
Chester/Wirral |
"Do you sit and wait to attract people or are you more confident and upfront?
If you want to talk to someone on here or out in the real world, do you sit and wait in hope they come to you by fanning your tail feathers, Or are you more of a confident beast grabbing the bull by the horns and making the first move?
How confident are you at breaking the ice? "
Pretty confident, if you don't ask you don't get is a good mantra. |
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By *vcarolTV/TS
over a year ago
kilmarnockish |
"I've not thought of 'go-getter' as a term I'd use to describe myself but I do initiate contact with people that I like in the real world. On fab, I do this less than respond to the interest shown to me as, generally, just keeping on top of my inbox is a job and a half.
It seems tough to recognise that there's a barrier that exists, of your own making, that you're not willing to at least take some steps to going beyond it. Any small step is generally better than taking no steps at all."
I generally kick or jump over and imaginary barrier go straight up to them and start talking generally i come across as some weird mental nut job that’s escaped, but sometimes it clicks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If someone catches my attention I will be bold and message them or sometimes if I see them on the forums I might put a flirty reply to their comment
Both approaches have worked quite well
In the real world I have become more bold also
I was on a train a few months ago and a woman who was very easy on the eye and intelligent considering her reading material sat opposite me
I took the bull by the horns and asked, “ good book”?
Luckily it was on a subject I had some knowledge of and the conversation flowed
A Fab friend asked, “if I took her to the toilet for some hot train sex”?
I said, “ nah it was an Arriva train have you seen the state of their toilets”!!
Now if it was a Virgin train it could of been a different story "
Hahaha  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If I'm meeting I get what I want. I don't have time to waste waiting for someone to approach me. I'm not 19 anymore (more's the pity)."
Confident woman right there guys....go get her! (Go getter....get her??? No?)  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I'm meeting I get what I want. I don't have time to waste waiting for someone to approach me. I'm not 19 anymore (more's the pity).
Confident woman right there guys....go get her! (Go getter....get her??? No?) "
I do hope you have a back up routine... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Do you sit and wait to attract people or are you more confident and upfront?
If you want to talk to someone on here or out in the real world, do you sit and wait in hope they come to you by fanning your tail feathers, Or are you more of a confident beast grabbing the bull by the horns and making the first move?
How confident are you at breaking the ice? "
9 times out of 10 when I try to talk to someone in the Fab world, either on here or at a club or social, I get ignored, which doesn't particularly instill confidence. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If I'm meeting I get what I want. I don't have time to waste waiting for someone to approach me. I'm not 19 anymore (more's the pity).
Confident woman right there guys....go get her! (Go getter....get her??? No?)
I do hope you have a back up routine..."
I can juggle. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I'm meeting I get what I want. I don't have time to waste waiting for someone to approach me. I'm not 19 anymore (more's the pity)."
I tried looking for what I wanted.
Then I realised I don't know what I want. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I'm meeting I get what I want. I don't have time to waste waiting for someone to approach me. I'm not 19 anymore (more's the pity).
I tried looking for what I wanted.
Then I realised I don't know what I want. "
That would present an obstacle. I'm very specific and focused on what I want... when I want it that is! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I'm meeting I get what I want. I don't have time to waste waiting for someone to approach me. I'm not 19 anymore (more's the pity).
I tried looking for what I wanted.
Then I realised I don't know what I want.
That would present an obstacle. I'm very specific and focused on what I want... when I want it that is!"
I know what I want from a man. I don't know the man I want it from. |
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"If I'm meeting I get what I want. I don't have time to waste waiting for someone to approach me. I'm not 19 anymore (more's the pity).
I tried looking for what I wanted.
Then I realised I don't know what I want.
That would present an obstacle. I'm very specific and focused on what I want... when I want it that is!
I know what I want from a man. I don't know the man I want it from."
Yup. I don't lack confidence at all - I used to just go sit at the bar and KNOW the sexiest guy in the room would come find me lol! Primal prey - I like being hunted, I find it boring as fuck to chase men!!  |
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"On here I intend to mail who I want when I want. Screw the consequences! You only live once right?
Out there I'll probably still hide under my shell. "
where the hell have you just sprung from thought you had set sail into the sunset |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I just do a message and copy and paste it to loads of ladies. 
Those who have a message from know that isn't true! I like messaging people, about 90% of the time I get a reply. Ok I sometimes hace to wait up to 2 days... Don't take long to read a profile and see if you hace things in common. You have to be pro active as you never know whp you'll meet. I started chatting to one person and we havent really stopped chatting for over 3 weeks and she's really great! Couldn't of asked for a better contact. She's a Scouse but her accent doesn't come across in a text only when we call. (You know I'm kidding! I hope!) I like to chat but some are not looking for friendship and chats. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"On here I intend to mail who I want when I want. Screw the consequences! You only live once right?
Out there I'll probably still hide under my shell. where the hell have you just sprung from thought you had set sail into the sunset"
They always come back. Welcome back Rubi. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On here I intend to mail who I want when I want. Screw the consequences! You only live once right?
Out there I'll probably still hide under my shell. where the hell have you just sprung from thought you had set sail into the sunset"
Hotel California!
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On here I intend to mail who I want when I want. Screw the consequences! You only live once right?
Out there I'll probably still hide under my shell. where the hell have you just sprung from thought you had set sail into the sunset
They always come back. Welcome back Rubi. "
I tried so hard!! The lure was too stronger. I'm weak!
And thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On here I intend to mail who I want when I want. Screw the consequences! You only live once right?
Out there I'll probably still hide under my shell. where the hell have you just sprung from thought you had set sail into the sunset
They always come back. Welcome back Rubi.
I tried so hard!! The lure was too stronger. I'm weak!
And thank you "
a weakness we all share |
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
Bit of both , on here I generally wouldn't as most people are far far away. In real life if I see someone I liked the look of I would go up and talk to them, to see what they are like. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On here I intend to mail who I want when I want. Screw the consequences! You only live once right?
Out there I'll probably still hide under my shell. where the hell have you just sprung from thought you had set sail into the sunset
They always come back. Welcome back Rubi.
I tried so hard!! The lure was too stronger. I'm weak!
And thank you "
Rubidoo!! 
Fabulous to see you back! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On here I intend to mail who I want when I want. Screw the consequences! You only live once right?
Out there I'll probably still hide under my shell. where the hell have you just sprung from thought you had set sail into the sunset
They always come back. Welcome back Rubi.
I tried so hard!! The lure was too stronger. I'm weak!
And thank you
Rubidoo!!
Fabulous to see you back!"
Hello gorgeous |
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
"On here I intend to mail who I want when I want. Screw the consequences! You only live once right?
Out there I'll probably still hide under my shell. where the hell have you just sprung from thought you had set sail into the sunset
They always come back. Welcome back Rubi.
I tried so hard!! The lure was too stronger. I'm weak!
And thank you
Rubidoo!!
Fabulous to see you back!
Hello gorgeous "
0h sweet Jesus, she's back |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm actually quite shy when clothed and assume everyone just thinks I'm nice so is not interested in me in anything other than a friends capacity. I rarely have to start conversations though, luckily, as most people comment about my hair or tattoos... I think if they didn't I would rarely talk to anyone I didn't know, unless I really had to  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have looked for what I want and I’ve waited for someone to approach me. Both have worked equally well "
Surely you're not waiting long for someone to approach you? I'm suprised you wait at all! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm typically a sit back and wait girl because Im a bit socially anxious and hate rejection. I have this constant feeling that nobody actually likes me, they tolerate me. It's something I'm working on and being on here is actually helping as M has put me in charge of our fab account (he can't be arsed with the internet)
Messaging people to tell them I'm interested in them has been a huge obstacle to overcome! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On here I intend to mail who I want when I want. Screw the consequences! You only live once right?
Out there I'll probably still hide under my shell. where the hell have you just sprung from thought you had set sail into the sunset
They always come back. Welcome back Rubi.
I tried so hard!! The lure was too stronger. I'm weak!
And thank you
Rubidoo!!
Fabulous to see you back!
Hello gorgeous
0h sweet Jesus, she's back "
Hush Arkwright! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If someone catches my attention I will be bold and message them or sometimes if I see them on the forums I might put a flirty reply to their comment
Both approaches have worked quite well
In the real world I have become more bold also
I was on a train a few months ago and a woman who was very easy on the eye and intelligent considering her reading material sat opposite me
I took the bull by the horns and asked, “ good book”?
Luckily it was on a subject I had some knowledge of and the conversation flowed
A Fab friend asked, “if I took her to the toilet for some hot train sex”?
I said, “ nah it was an Arriva train have you seen the state of their toilets”!!
Now if it was a Virgin train it could of been a different story
Hahaha "
I know you enjoyed the story but the almost frostbitten willy one was better |
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