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Covering travel costs

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Don't do it. Why on earth would you?

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By *adeiteWoman  over a year ago

Staffordshire

Nope. Big no no from me.

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By *he riverdeep69Couple  over a year ago

North west ish


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

So will you be handing over money? For expenses? Don't do it. Any self respecting female would not expect that.

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By *appytochatMan  over a year ago

Deep in the New Forest

Share hotel costs yes... pay for their travel costs no. It's not a pay for sex site.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's an equal exchange right? Is she paying for something else? And if the cost a small why would she ask you to pay anyway? Steer clear.

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple  over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

Whatever next satisfaction guarantees...

Can see the value of a shared hotel bill if nobody is staying there, but everything else is down to each of you surely.

Wouldn't dream of asking somebody to stump up towards our ferry costs, as expensive as they are.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Tell her you need to cover your accommodating costs. Or tell her to do one.

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By *rownboy30Man  over a year ago

Birmingham

Red flag warning bells, fire alarm, nope nope, you kidding, jeez man, run a mile ...and so forth

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By *allySlinkyWoman  over a year ago

Leeds

I used to meet men in hotel rooms that were getting it free with work and I would ask for £10 as half my taxi fare. They were always happy to pay. Otherwise it would be costing me £20 for sex and them nothing.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Don't do it..

And she is a cheeky fecker for asking too..

Some people

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No bloody way. That's crazy. Why the hell would you? Share a hotel yes but travel costs are part of it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I wouldnt accept it under anny cercumstances

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Maybe I should be asking for petrol money when I visit people.

Missed a trick there

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Wonder how many she has done this too.

Be paying for drinks beforehand?

How many drinks?

And on it goes

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

Define 'fairly small'?

Actually. Nah - anything at all is a financial transaction so don't worry.

I'm sure you don't see it as paying for sex. I'm sure she probably doesn't see an issue with it either.

But it's a dangerous road to go down for both parties for what is meant to be mutual fund.

A

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By *appytochatMan  over a year ago

Deep in the New Forest


"I used to meet men in hotel rooms that were getting it free with work and I would ask for £10 as half my taxi fare. They were always happy to pay. Otherwise it would be costing me £20 for sex and them nothing. "

Do you ask the same if you meet at their house?

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I used to meet men in hotel rooms that were getting it free with work and I would ask for £10 as half my taxi fare. They were always happy to pay. Otherwise it would be costing me £20 for sex and them nothing. "

Out of interest would you have asked the same if it had been their home?

A

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If you really want sex that much ask her for a receipt and pay her after you have had sex.

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By *allySlinkyWoman  over a year ago

Leeds

If I drive to someone's house I wouldn't ask for anything. Have never taken a taxi to someones house

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By *evaquitCouple  over a year ago

Catthorpe

No chance, tell her no. We often travel to London and split the guys hotel cost. We'd never dream of asking him for half the petrol money, that's our choice, our responsibility, same goes for her, op.

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By *VineMan  over a year ago

The right place

Make sure you get a reciept! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If costs are shared no issue but not a chance if I’m asked to pay it all. Caveat Emptor!

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"If I drive to someone's house I wouldn't ask for anything. Have never taken a taxi to someones house"

Wouldn't driving to a hotel be cheaper?

A

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I used to meet men in hotel rooms that were getting it free with work and I would ask for £10 as half my taxi fare. They were always happy to pay. Otherwise it would be costing me £20 for sex and them nothing. "

What if they paid for the hotel? Would you have given them half the hotel cost?

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By *adeiteWoman  over a year ago

Staffordshire


"I used to meet men in hotel rooms that were getting it free with work and I would ask for £10 as half my taxi fare. They were always happy to pay. Otherwise it would be costing me £20 for sex and them nothing. "

In the nicest way possible, it was your choice to meet them, if you felt £20 for a taxi was too much then don't meet, it's just rude asking for money.

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By *orwegian BlueMan  over a year ago

Iceland, but Aldi is closer..

I'm gonna play devil's advocate and suggest that maybe she isn't quite as well off as some on here and therefore may need assistance with travel costs..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

What next?

Paying for the woman's stockings, make up and McDonald's on the way home?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A fool and money are easily parted

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By *uxomBloomsWoman  over a year ago

Near Tunbridge Wells

If you were expecting her to travel a long distance to meet you and she is in financial difficulties I don't think it's that bad. I would never ask but if it were offered I might accept as it can be difficult living on minimum wage.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm gonna play devil's advocate and suggest that maybe she isn't quite as well off as some on here and therefore may need assistance with travel costs.. "

Then she shouldn't be arranging to meet people, if she can't afford bus fare.

I'm not well off but I can scrape up some travel money.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bloody cheek If someone has to travel to meet me I never ask them to go halves on the hotel just out of courtesy and so it evens things out . She shouldn’t have agreed to the meet x

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By *evaquitCouple  over a year ago

Catthorpe


"I used to meet men in hotel rooms that were getting it free with work and I would ask for £10 as half my taxi fare. They were always happy to pay. Otherwise it would be costing me £20 for sex and them nothing. "

Sorry have to disagree. The fact he gets the room free means you don't have to pay half the room cost, that's great news for you. How you get there and back is your concern and should be footed by you. That's our take on it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If I drive to someone's house I wouldn't ask for anything. Have never taken a taxi to someones house"

Don't you use public transport?

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By *allySlinkyWoman  over a year ago

Leeds


"

What if they paid for the hotel? Would you have given them half the hotel cost? "

Yes I have always split the cost of a hotel or payed it all myself

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I used to meet men in hotel rooms that were getting it free with work and I would ask for £10 as half my taxi fare. They were always happy to pay. Otherwise it would be costing me £20 for sex and them nothing.

Sorry have to disagree. The fact he gets the room free means you don't have to pay half the room cost, that's great news for you. How you get there and back is your concern and should be footed by you. That's our take on it. "

And you're not paying for the sex.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

What if they paid for the hotel? Would you have given them half the hotel cost?

Yes I have always split the cost of a hotel or payed it all myself"

So why ask for taxi fare? You're saving on the room cost and he has to get to the hotel too?

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By *olden RatioWoman  over a year ago

Buckinghamshire

Being asked to pay for someone else’s travel costs isn’t cool.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No! Steer clear. Can’t believe someone would actually say that!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

Of course it all depends on how desperate you are

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By *anguyXXXMan  over a year ago

torquay

Its a tricky one really, if she can not accom and she is broke then depending on the connection etc i would just buy the train ticket or whatever. Handing over cash would feel dodgy and transfering money before you meet is a no go. It could also be easily misconstrued legaly. I visit someone in southampton and happily pay the 50 quid fair and for the hotel too. She then being the legend she is treats me to dinner drinks and lunch the next day.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Noooooo! X

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By *iamondCougarWoman  over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Nope! Definitely not! No way!

If I travel to a meet it’s up to me to cover costs. If it involves a hotel I go halves...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Never ever send money to someone ahead of a planned "meet", OP. Can pretty much guarantee that once they have your money in their hand they will disappear or block you.

Any real female or couple will get themselves to wherever you are meeting up, perhaps you can get the first round in but definitely no money

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By *olfAndKittenCouple  over a year ago

Bristol

If someone is serious about a meet why would they ask ahead of time?

Granted discuss it and make a plan... Like going halves on a taxi or something but pay once they are there!

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for. "

In which case....don't travel and have a wank. Whether you're male or female.

There will always be more important things to spend money on.

We have essential priority bills and those bills we 'choose' to have which has meant no holiday for years.

But swinging has always been an optional activity. And if we can't afford a club visit we don't go. If we can't afford to book a hotel we don't. If we had a choice of fuel in the car for work or for a fun trip....yep....the former wins. There'll always be people with more disposable income and those with less. But I'd you're paying for sex you're paying for sex, whether you book an escort or cover someone's 'expenses'.

There's nothing wrong with choosing to pay for sex. But don't try and blur the lines and call it swinging.

A

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My meets have always happily paid the hotel and ordered my Ubers/paid for my taxis.

I don't put done other women who don't do this and I don't appreciate other women putting down women who do do this.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Its a tricky one really, if she can not accom and she is broke then depending on the connection etc i would just buy the train ticket or whatever. Handing over cash would feel dodgy and transfering money before you meet is a no go. It could also be easily misconstrued legaly. I visit someone in southampton and happily pay the 50 quid fair and for the hotel too. She then being the legend she is treats me to dinner drinks and lunch the next day. "

Totally agree. Never hand over cash.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My meets have always happily paid the hotel and ordered my Ubers/paid for my taxis.

I don't put done other women who don't do this and I don't appreciate other women putting down women who do do this."

My last meet, he paid for the hotel and dinner. We met at the station, I bought him coffee and we travelled by tube to the hotel together.

People do what works for them.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That's crazy! Definitely an odd thing to ask for.

As a couple we pay for the hotel when meeting a guy, even if we aren't staying overnight.

Would not consider meeting him if he asked for travel expenses, just plain cheeky.

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By *itty9899Man  over a year ago

Craggy Island

For the first time agree to pay half or meet somewhere in the middle.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for. "

She could just go without sex instead.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead."

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures."

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A"

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Nope! Definitely not! No way!

If I travel to a meet it’s up to me to cover costs. If it involves a hotel I go halves... "

Absolutely

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By *rkeb3Man  over a year ago

east Lancashire road

[Removed by poster at 06/01/19 16:24:08]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My meets have always happily paid the hotel and ordered my Ubers/paid for my taxis.

I don't put done other women who don't do this and I don't appreciate other women putting down women who do do this."

He asked for people’s thoughts though. My thoughts are if I couldn’t afford it I wouldn’t go. I would never ever even think of asking someone to cover my travel costs.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My meets have always happily paid the hotel and ordered my Ubers/paid for my taxis.

I don't put done other women who don't do this and I don't appreciate other women putting down women who do do this.

He asked for people’s thoughts though. My thoughts are if I couldn’t afford it I wouldn’t go. I would never ever even think of asking someone to cover my travel costs. "

Clearly can't tell the difference between stating what you choose for yourself and moralising what others do.

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By *rkeb3Man  over a year ago

east Lancashire road


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do."

he must been so desperate

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My meets have always happily paid the hotel and ordered my Ubers/paid for my taxis.

I don't put done other women who don't do this and I don't appreciate other women putting down women who do do this.

He asked for people’s thoughts though. My thoughts are if I couldn’t afford it I wouldn’t go. I would never ever even think of asking someone to cover my travel costs.

Clearly can't tell the difference between stating what you choose for yourself and moralising what others do."

I couldn’t give a hoot what others do. I’m giving my thoughts and opinion as requested

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By *owdyboy 890Man  over a year ago

Country West

Not a hope am I covering travel costs probably ask for a taxi for a round trip to make it more expensive

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.he must been so desperate "

That's your opinion . But I would judge by your lack of veris and my actual veris that that isn't the case.

You do you,boo.

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do."

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My meets have always happily paid the hotel and ordered my Ubers/paid for my taxis.

I don't put done other women who don't do this and I don't appreciate other women putting down women who do do this.

He asked for people’s thoughts though. My thoughts are if I couldn’t afford it I wouldn’t go. I would never ever even think of asking someone to cover my travel costs.

Clearly can't tell the difference between stating what you choose for yourself and moralising what others do.

I couldn’t give a hoot what others do. I’m giving my thoughts and opinion as requested "

So do your thing and keep quiet.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My meets have always happily paid the hotel and ordered my Ubers/paid for my taxis.

I don't put done other women who don't do this and I don't appreciate other women putting down women who do do this.

He asked for people’s thoughts though. My thoughts are if I couldn’t afford it I wouldn’t go. I would never ever even think of asking someone to cover my travel costs.

Clearly can't tell the difference between stating what you choose for yourself and moralising what others do.

I couldn’t give a hoot what others do. I’m giving my thoughts and opinion as requested

So do your thing and keep quiet."

Haha. Ok

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A"

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *andare63Man  over a year ago

oldham

I’m guessing it depends on how desperate you are for sex and how desperate this woman is for money .

If the cost of her travelling is minimal then it may be that she is in the unfortunate position of having very little expendable income .

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A"

Spot on.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.he must been so desperate "

No need to be rude.

Playing devil's advocate I am wondering what costs the poster referred to there - if she has for instance spent £60 on lingerie for the meet, is it not morally acceptable to let the guy pay the £60 for the room?

I would not ask for travel or taxi fare, but I have been treated to eg a trip or a hotel I otherwise could not afford, and that is within someone's perogative to offer and mine to accept I believe.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *layfullsamMan  over a year ago

Solihull


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

Give your head a wobble, it's got scam written all over it

Next she'll ask for it up front and you'll never hear from her again.

Call his/her bluff and say you'll travel to them instead.

Or ask them for money up front and say you'll give them a rebate plus 10% if they're a good shag

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Balls to her.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm walking awaaaaay

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I wouldn't dream of asking a guy for money to meet. If I was skint, the meet wouldn't happen. Never asked a man for money ever, not about to start now.

If I suggest a hotel, it means I will pay, if I suggest a drink or a meal it means I will pay.

I've never had a guy take advantage either, if he insists on paying, then I will buy wine, nibbles or whatever.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *SAchickWoman  over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"Balls to her."

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays."

You only buy makeup etc for the benefit of the blokes you meet?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays."

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A"

. This is hilarious

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A"

You've proven the point. Everyone is paying. So to look at only one aspect is bs.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

You only buy makeup etc for the benefit of the blokes you meet?"

Yes. Everything I do in life is for the benefit of men.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

You've proven the point. Everyone is paying. So to look at only one aspect is bs."

I havent. Trust me - I really haven't.

A

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A"

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

You only buy makeup etc for the benefit of the blokes you meet?

Yes. Everything I do in life is for the benefit of men."

That's quite a sad statement really

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?"

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays."

I would have make up and clothes already, and if I buy it, it's because I want it, bot because I'm meeting.

If you bought clothes and make, ,hair dos and treatments to go out with friends, or to go to a wedding or for work, would you also want to invoice those people for it?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

I would have make up and clothes already, and if I buy it, it's because I want it, bot because I'm meeting.

If you bought clothes and make, ,hair dos and treatments to go out with friends, or to go to a wedding or for work, would you also want to invoice those people for it?

"

I just pay for my friends when we go out to eat and drink

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?"

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Fuck

I’ll be making invoices and emailing them in due course

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?"

Jeez are you for real so just because you might not get paid as much as a man that it’s ok to expect everything to be paid for?

So you know that all the men you meet are paid more than you? Or do you only meet rich/wealthy men?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A"

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?

Jeez are you for real so just because you might not get paid as much as a man that it’s ok to expect everything to be paid for?

So you know that all the men you meet are paid more than you? Or do you only meet rich/wealthy men?

"

Except I don't expect him to pay for everything. Read the preceding messages

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *ookingforfun9970Man  over a year ago

nearby


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

I mean if it’s a small cost maybe but if she’s having to go out of her way and it’s a little costly then of course offer to cover half at least, but everyone has their own opinions here

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.he must been so desperate

No need to be rude.

Playing devil's advocate I am wondering what costs the poster referred to there - if she has for instance spent £60 on lingerie for the meet, is it not morally acceptable to let the guy pay the £60 for the room?

I would not ask for travel or taxi fare, but I have been treated to eg a trip or a hotel I otherwise could not afford, and that is within someone's perogative to offer and mine to accept I believe."

A woman chooses to buy expensive lingerie though; it's not a necessity. If a man expected new lingerie every time I met him I would tell him to supply it, but they don't, and I don't

If this was a fwb relationship and he knew her well and really wanted to see her then give her her travel costs, or pick her up.

I had a friend I was seeing for a couple of years ago wanted me to visit him every Sunday. I told him I couldn't afford to, so would only be once a fortnight, as I couldn't afford £25 a week.

He gave me the fare money on a couple of occasions, which I had no problem taking, as he was loaded. But, if he has said ok, I'll see you twice a month I wouldn't have asked him for the fare money.

On here I wouldn't trust a stranger enough to give them anything up front.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?"

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?

Jeez are you for real so just because you might not get paid as much as a man that it’s ok to expect everything to be paid for?

So you know that all the men you meet are paid more than you? Or do you only meet rich/wealthy men?

Except I don't expect him to pay for everything. Read the preceding messages "

You expect your travel and hotel to be paid though? Almost as bad as being paid isn’t it?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *ojos party boyMan  over a year ago

Merseyside


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

i assume you've helped hundreds of nigerian princes if you fall for this scam

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *abs..Woman  over a year ago

..

It isn’t something I would ask of someone, nor would I pay for anyone that requested it.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?

Jeez are you for real so just because you might not get paid as much as a man that it’s ok to expect everything to be paid for?

So you know that all the men you meet are paid more than you? Or do you only meet rich/wealthy men?

Except I don't expect him to pay for everything. Read the preceding messages

You expect your travel and hotel to be paid though? Almost as bad as being paid isn’t it?

"

Yes if I'm travelling out of central london. Otherwise guys normally ask me which hotel is local to me.

And by the way I'm not going to throw sex workers under the bus like you have. Being paid for sex is not 'bad' like you say. But I'm on fab, I don't charge for sex.

You have some shit to unpack it seems. It's not my problem that you dislike how I choose to cultivate my love life.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay. "

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Shared hotel costs only.

Anything else is bang out of order x

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *os19Man  over a year ago

Edmonton


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

. Sorry mate but alarm bells would be ringing for me.I understand they are verified but unless I have met them before or know the person that has done the verification I wouldn’t be paying travel costs.I have no problem paying a contribution for the hotel room or if it’s in some one house and they want a small contribution.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?

Jeez are you for real so just because you might not get paid as much as a man that it’s ok to expect everything to be paid for?

So you know that all the men you meet are paid more than you? Or do you only meet rich/wealthy men?

Except I don't expect him to pay for everything. Read the preceding messages

You expect your travel and hotel to be paid though? Almost as bad as being paid isn’t it?

Yes if I'm travelling out of central london. Otherwise guys normally ask me which hotel is local to me.

And by the way I'm not going to throw sex workers under the bus like you have. Being paid for sex is not 'bad' like you say. But I'm on fab, I don't charge for sex.

You have some shit to unpack it seems. It's not my problem that you dislike how I choose to cultivate my love life."

I know you told me to keep quiet but unfortunately I don’t do what I’m told. Seems to me you’re the one with the chip on the shoulder here. Nobody has thrown sex workers under the bus. This isn’t about that. The op asked for thoughts. It’s a discussion. You don’t say to people do what you do and be quiet on a discussion.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?"

Again where did she slate you?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?

Jeez are you for real so just because you might not get paid as much as a man that it’s ok to expect everything to be paid for?

So you know that all the men you meet are paid more than you? Or do you only meet rich/wealthy men?

Except I don't expect him to pay for everything. Read the preceding messages

You expect your travel and hotel to be paid though? Almost as bad as being paid isn’t it?

Yes if I'm travelling out of central london. Otherwise guys normally ask me which hotel is local to me.

And by the way I'm not going to throw sex workers under the bus like you have. Being paid for sex is not 'bad' like you say. But I'm on fab, I don't charge for sex.

You have some shit to unpack it seems. It's not my problem that you dislike how I choose to cultivate my love life."

Personally I have no issue with people being paid for sex, assuming it's of their own free will and no coercion/extortion is involved.

I just wish those that do it through 'alternative' methods were at least a little more honest with themselves.

If someone's not happy to meet unless costs are covered, gifts are given and they're not happy paying their own way on equal terms with whoever they're meeting then is there any difference?

It's one thing to be offered. Another to expect or to ask.

A

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?

Jeez are you for real so just because you might not get paid as much as a man that it’s ok to expect everything to be paid for?

So you know that all the men you meet are paid more than you? Or do you only meet rich/wealthy men?

Except I don't expect him to pay for everything. Read the preceding messages

You expect your travel and hotel to be paid though? Almost as bad as being paid isn’t it?

Yes if I'm travelling out of central london. Otherwise guys normally ask me which hotel is local to me.

And by the way I'm not going to throw sex workers under the bus like you have. Being paid for sex is not 'bad' like you say. But I'm on fab, I don't charge for sex.

You have some shit to unpack it seems. It's not my problem that you dislike how I choose to cultivate my love life.

I know you told me to keep quiet but unfortunately I don’t do what I’m told. Seems to me you’re the one with the chip on the shoulder here. Nobody has thrown sex workers under the bus. This isn’t about that. The op asked for thoughts. It’s a discussion. You don’t say to people do what you do and be quiet on a discussion. "

Yawn.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?

Jeez are you for real so just because you might not get paid as much as a man that it’s ok to expect everything to be paid for?

So you know that all the men you meet are paid more than you? Or do you only meet rich/wealthy men?

Except I don't expect him to pay for everything. Read the preceding messages

You expect your travel and hotel to be paid though? Almost as bad as being paid isn’t it?

Yes if I'm travelling out of central london. Otherwise guys normally ask me which hotel is local to me.

And by the way I'm not going to throw sex workers under the bus like you have. Being paid for sex is not 'bad' like you say. But I'm on fab, I don't charge for sex.

You have some shit to unpack it seems. It's not my problem that you dislike how I choose to cultivate my love life."

I don’t have a problem with sex workers as you put it they are expecting to be paid for sexual services.

You seem to expect to have the niceties paid for which is not far off being paid for is it just that no actual money is exchanged.

I guess I don’t feel comfortable having everything paid for and feel that regardless of gender pay gap that if I can’t afford to pay my way then it no meet.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?

Jeez are you for real so just because you might not get paid as much as a man that it’s ok to expect everything to be paid for?

So you know that all the men you meet are paid more than you? Or do you only meet rich/wealthy men?

Except I don't expect him to pay for everything. Read the preceding messages

You expect your travel and hotel to be paid though? Almost as bad as being paid isn’t it?

Yes if I'm travelling out of central london. Otherwise guys normally ask me which hotel is local to me.

And by the way I'm not going to throw sex workers under the bus like you have. Being paid for sex is not 'bad' like you say. But I'm on fab, I don't charge for sex.

You have some shit to unpack it seems. It's not my problem that you dislike how I choose to cultivate my love life.

Personally I have no issue with people being paid for sex, assuming it's of their own free will and no coercion/extortion is involved.

I just wish those that do it through 'alternative' methods were at least a little more honest with themselves.

If someone's not happy to meet unless costs are covered, gifts are given and they're not happy paying their own way on equal terms with whoever they're meeting then is there any difference?

It's one thing to be offered. Another to expect or to ask.

A"

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

Have you closed that gender pay gap then?

You do realise equality doesn't exist without justice, right?

Jeez are you for real so just because you might not get paid as much as a man that it’s ok to expect everything to be paid for?

So you know that all the men you meet are paid more than you? Or do you only meet rich/wealthy men?

Except I don't expect him to pay for everything. Read the preceding messages

You expect your travel and hotel to be paid though? Almost as bad as being paid isn’t it?

Yes if I'm travelling out of central london. Otherwise guys normally ask me which hotel is local to me.

And by the way I'm not going to throw sex workers under the bus like you have. Being paid for sex is not 'bad' like you say. But I'm on fab, I don't charge for sex.

You have some shit to unpack it seems. It's not my problem that you dislike how I choose to cultivate my love life.

I don’t have a problem with sex workers as you put it they are expecting to be paid for sexual services.

You seem to expect to have the niceties paid for which is not far off being paid for is it just that no actual money is exchanged.

I guess I don’t feel comfortable having everything paid for and feel that regardless of gender pay gap that if I can’t afford to pay my way then it no meet.

"

Then you do you.

I'm not putting any women down regardless of how they choose to conduct their meets.

I state how I operate. I don't care how anyone else operates. I also don't out any women for how they do things.

I mean I could put married women down and say that they should pay every thing 50 50 or they are sex workers with a ring on a finger. But I neither subscribe to that rhetoric nor is it my place to put those women down.

I also don't care if you think what I do is bbeing paid for sex without money changing hands. Newsflash that's not being paid for sex.

Stop projecting your discomfort onto others.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?"

I haven't slated you. Meeting anyone anywhere who you don't know isn't 100% safe. If men are happy to offer to pay your expenses that's entirely their choice, abd if you tell them up front that they have to pay for travel and the hotel but they might not get sex, that's the chance they take in the hope of getting sex.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

No.

Just, no.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"

I would not ask for travel or taxi fare, but I have been treated to eg a trip or a hotel I otherwise could not afford, and that is within someone's perogative to offer and mine to accept I believe.

A woman chooses to buy expensive lingerie though; it's not a necessity. If a man expected new lingerie every time I met him I would tell him to supply it, but they don't, and I don't

If this was a fwb relationship and he knew her well and really wanted to see her then give her her travel costs, or pick her up.

I had a friend I was seeing for a couple of years ago wanted me to visit him every Sunday. I told him I couldn't afford to, so would only be once a fortnight, as I couldn't afford £25 a week.

He gave me the fare money on a couple of occasions, which I had no problem taking, as he was loaded. But, if he has said ok, I'll see you twice a month I wouldn't have asked him for the fare money.

On here I wouldn't trust a stranger enough to give them anything up front.

"

Yup, I would agree with all of that - I don't agree with the moral absolutes the majority like to impose on here.

If I suggest a hotel room within my budget, and a fab friend says 'Sod that, I want the 5* hotel, my treat!' I'm not going to argue!!

If a gentleman asked a lady for certain lingerie and she obliged it would seem fair to me for him to get the room?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters."

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

Paying for their travel? No no no no. No no no no no no no! Each to their own lol. Seriously though, why would you? Don't answer that! I would have thought most of us have limits on fab. Whether it is age, distance, height, weight, kink etc. So if she can't afford to get to meets, its a bit rude to chance her arm. Although, you are happy to do it, so crack on. Hope the meet goes well. I personally wouldn't.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

I haven't slated you. Meeting anyone anywhere who you don't know isn't 100% safe. If men are happy to offer to pay your expenses that's entirely their choice, abd if you tell them up front that they have to pay for travel and the hotel but they might not get sex, that's the chance they take in the hope of getting sex."

Even if I paid for the hotel I am not guaranteeing anyone sex. I don't do r*pe. I'm sorry you subscribe to that pov.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel? "

Men don't send me money, for travel or otherwise. I've never stated not insinuated that.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *exysingle11Woman  over a year ago

Near Louth

I would never in a million years expect another fabber to pay towards the costs of me meeting them. I specify i cannot accomodate which means meeting elsewhere and of course i accept that i will somehow have to get myself there and that there will be a cost associated with this. I rarely consider hotel meets because my household finances have bigger priorities than me getting laid however if i did accept a hotel meet it would be on the understanding that im liable for half the cost. I would also happily foot the cost of condoms because after all im usually the person insisting they are used and if ive provided them then i know they're good.

The only circumstances i would accept any money would be if a person i met caused any damage to my property during a meet and was paying to repair or replace it.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

I haven't slated you. Meeting anyone anywhere who you don't know isn't 100% safe. If men are happy to offer to pay your expenses that's entirely their choice, abd if you tell them up front that they have to pay for travel and the hotel but they might not get sex, that's the chance they take in the hope of getting sex.

Even if I paid for the hotel I am not guaranteeing anyone sex. I don't do r*pe. I'm sorry you subscribe to that pov."

This is getting funnier by the minute. “I don’t do r*pe”. Someone who’s not comfortable meeting someone in a hotel is projecting her discomfort on others? Really!?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

I haven't slated you. Meeting anyone anywhere who you don't know isn't 100% safe. If men are happy to offer to pay your expenses that's entirely their choice, abd if you tell them up front that they have to pay for travel and the hotel but they might not get sex, that's the chance they take in the hope of getting sex.

Even if I paid for the hotel I am not guaranteeing anyone sex. I don't do r*pe. I'm sorry you subscribe to that pov."

You seem to be having a problem reading what I'm writing. I said he won't be guaranteed sex, even if he's paid for your travel and the hotel. Where you're getting ra*e from I have no idea.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel?

Men don't send me money, for travel or otherwise. I've never stated not insinuated that."

Sorry, I thought you said they gave you your travel money. That must have been someone else on the thread. It gets confusing when comments are copied and quoted.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Wow

This escalated a bit rapidly. I'm off to my meet now.

He's paid for the room at the Etap, and I'm just waiting on the Uber driver.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *loswingersCouple  over a year ago

Gloucester

And there was me thinking fab was a way to facilitate mutually agreeable nsa sex between adults of a similar mind .

I thought from reading some of these posts I was reading AW forum !

Whatever next ?

Paying for travel to a meet , paying the full hotel cost , where does it end ?

Some people must be so desperate , and it would actually be cheaper to see a sex worker than to pay for a hotel and someone’s taxi fare !

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel?

Men don't send me money, for travel or otherwise. I've never stated not insinuated that.

Sorry, I thought you said they gave you your travel money. That must have been someone else on the thread. It gets confusing when comments are copied and quoted. "

No I said men pay for my Uber or taxi. I don't ask them for any money in advance. They just do it on their account. Or they book a local hotel.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

I haven't slated you. Meeting anyone anywhere who you don't know isn't 100% safe. If men are happy to offer to pay your expenses that's entirely their choice, abd if you tell them up front that they have to pay for travel and the hotel but they might not get sex, that's the chance they take in the hope of getting sex.

Even if I paid for the hotel I am not guaranteeing anyone sex. I don't do r*pe. I'm sorry you subscribe to that pov.

You seem to be having a problem reading what I'm writing. I said he won't be guaranteed sex, even if he's paid for your travel and the hotel. Where you're getting ra*e from I have no idea."

Because guaranteed sex when it's against someones will is r*pe.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If she were travelling just to meet me I would have no issue offering to share the cost of the journey if it's significant, but certainly not pay for her travel outright. It's not a chance from me.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?"

I actually find hotels more threatening - after all, he could have paid with false details and could be anyone. If you have someone's home address, your safety-mate know where to send the police if you don't check in when you're due to!!

I usually refuse to meet people who can only meet in hotels anyway as it's too expensive on a regular basis, and they could be playing away without permission.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

I haven't slated you. Meeting anyone anywhere who you don't know isn't 100% safe. If men are happy to offer to pay your expenses that's entirely their choice, abd if you tell them up front that they have to pay for travel and the hotel but they might not get sex, that's the chance they take in the hope of getting sex.

Even if I paid for the hotel I am not guaranteeing anyone sex. I don't do r*pe. I'm sorry you subscribe to that pov.

You seem to be having a problem reading what I'm writing. I said he won't be guaranteed sex, even if he's paid for your travel and the hotel. Where you're getting ra*e from I have no idea.

Because guaranteed sex when it's against someones will is r*pe."

I know. I didn't write anything like that. I said it's up to them if they want to take the chance on paying for expenses for a woman they may not get sex from. I didn't mention anything about them ra*ing the woman.

I am assuming thought that you are meeting them for sex, or they wouldn't need a hotel room and could meet you for a social at a local coffee shop.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *gnitemybodyWoman  over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Cheeky mare I would never dream of that,if I couldn't afford the travelling costs I wouldn't go.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Personally, if I couldn't afford it then I wouldn't. Goes for everything ...

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

I actually find hotels more threatening - after all, he could have paid with false details and could be anyone. If you have someone's home address, your safety-mate know where to send the police if you don't check in when you're due to!!

I usually refuse to meet people who can only meet in hotels anyway as it's too expensive on a regular basis, and they could be playing away without permission."

The point is every woman has the right to feel safe in her own way. I totally get how you feel about hotels (you need to show photographic ID to check in, but that doesn't invalidate your feelings), but for me, I have had far too many issues at men's houses, and I feel safer in hotels. Not even just safety, but other things like hygiene - everyone has differing standards. For me to enjoy sex I must feel comfortable, and this is one way I can do it. I have also met with a guy who went to a girl's house, only for a guy to be there who demanded he hand over all the money he had on him

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Cheeky mare I would never dream of that,if I couldn't afford the travelling costs I wouldn't go."

Being a million miles away, you're taxi bills must be horrific?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel?

Men don't send me money, for travel or otherwise. I've never stated not insinuated that.

Sorry, I thought you said they gave you your travel money. That must have been someone else on the thread. It gets confusing when comments are copied and quoted.

No I said men pay for my Uber or taxi. I don't ask them for any money in advance. They just do it on their account. Or they book a local hotel."

What else do you expect them to supply for your night of enjoyment?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

I haven't slated you. Meeting anyone anywhere who you don't know isn't 100% safe. If men are happy to offer to pay your expenses that's entirely their choice, abd if you tell them up front that they have to pay for travel and the hotel but they might not get sex, that's the chance they take in the hope of getting sex.

Even if I paid for the hotel I am not guaranteeing anyone sex. I don't do r*pe. I'm sorry you subscribe to that pov.

You seem to be having a problem reading what I'm writing. I said he won't be guaranteed sex, even if he's paid for your travel and the hotel. Where you're getting ra*e from I have no idea.

Because guaranteed sex when it's against someones will is r*pe.

I know. I didn't write anything like that. I said it's up to them if they want to take the chance on paying for expenses for a woman they may not get sex from. I didn't mention anything about them ra*ing the woman.

I am assuming thought that you are meeting them for sex, or they wouldn't need a hotel room and could meet you for a social at a local coffee shop.

"

In general yes, although I've had a couple of social meets in hotel bars which turned into us going to a room. That's actually a good halfway house I enjoy.

Coercing a guy who is not into a woman, touching him without consent to make him hard, sucking him off because you know his body will react is all r*pe, even if not legally defined as such.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Peeps. I think we can stop quoting! Lol

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel?

Men don't send me money, for travel or otherwise. I've never stated not insinuated that.

Sorry, I thought you said they gave you your travel money. That must have been someone else on the thread. It gets confusing when comments are copied and quoted.

No I said men pay for my Uber or taxi. I don't ask them for any money in advance. They just do it on their account. Or they book a local hotel.

What else do you expect them to supply for your night of enjoyment? "

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

I have offered half the costs in the past. But they never accepted. It feels seedy and a bit wrong to give them cash.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

I haven't slated you. Meeting anyone anywhere who you don't know isn't 100% safe. If men are happy to offer to pay your expenses that's entirely their choice, abd if you tell them up front that they have to pay for travel and the hotel but they might not get sex, that's the chance they take in the hope of getting sex.

Even if I paid for the hotel I am not guaranteeing anyone sex. I don't do r*pe. I'm sorry you subscribe to that pov.

You seem to be having a problem reading what I'm writing. I said he won't be guaranteed sex, even if he's paid for your travel and the hotel. Where you're getting ra*e from I have no idea.

Because guaranteed sex when it's against someones will is r*pe.

I know. I didn't write anything like that. I said it's up to them if they want to take the chance on paying for expenses for a woman they may not get sex from. I didn't mention anything about them ra*ing the woman.

I am assuming thought that you are meeting them for sex, or they wouldn't need a hotel room and could meet you for a social at a local coffee shop.

In general yes, although I've had a couple of social meets in hotel bars which turned into us going to a room. That's actually a good halfway house I enjoy.

Coercing a guy who is not into a woman, touching him without consent to make him hard, sucking him off because you know his body will react is all r*pe, even if not legally defined as such."

Coercing a guy to a bedroom/hotel room touching him and sucking him off because you know he will react is r*pe???? What?!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel?

Men don't send me money, for travel or otherwise. I've never stated not insinuated that.

Sorry, I thought you said they gave you your travel money. That must have been someone else on the thread. It gets confusing when comments are copied and quoted.

No I said men pay for my Uber or taxi. I don't ask them for any money in advance. They just do it on their account. Or they book a local hotel.

What else do you expect them to supply for your night of enjoyment?

You can read my profile - it's all on there. "

You don't ask for much do you

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel?

Men don't send me money, for travel or otherwise. I've never stated not insinuated that.

Sorry, I thought you said they gave you your travel money. That must have been someone else on the thread. It gets confusing when comments are copied and quoted.

No I said men pay for my Uber or taxi. I don't ask them for any money in advance. They just do it on their account. Or they book a local hotel.

What else do you expect them to supply for your night of enjoyment?

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you "

If asked for all that I would be concerned that the people paying would expect sex, and I would have to be 100% sure I was going to give them sex.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel?

Men don't send me money, for travel or otherwise. I've never stated not insinuated that.

Sorry, I thought you said they gave you your travel money. That must have been someone else on the thread. It gets confusing when comments are copied and quoted.

No I said men pay for my Uber or taxi. I don't ask them for any money in advance. They just do it on their account. Or they book a local hotel.

What else do you expect them to supply for your night of enjoyment?

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you "

I guess when you're basic you view everything as extra.

And I do wonder what you deem as 'much'. What exactly do I ask for on my profile?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel?

Men don't send me money, for travel or otherwise. I've never stated not insinuated that.

Sorry, I thought you said they gave you your travel money. That must have been someone else on the thread. It gets confusing when comments are copied and quoted.

No I said men pay for my Uber or taxi. I don't ask them for any money in advance. They just do it on their account. Or they book a local hotel.

What else do you expect them to supply for your night of enjoyment?

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you

If asked for all that I would be concerned that the people paying would expect sex, and I would have to be 100% sure I was going to give them sex."

I don't think so - I don't exchange money paid for a hotel room for sex. If you do, that's up to you.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *ornylittlesubWoman  over a year ago

Grangemouth

My 2 pence worth....do what you want/feel is right. Fuck what anyone else thinks, why would you care anyway, i am pretty sure you already know what your going to do.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

I haven't slated you. Meeting anyone anywhere who you don't know isn't 100% safe. If men are happy to offer to pay your expenses that's entirely their choice, abd if you tell them up front that they have to pay for travel and the hotel but they might not get sex, that's the chance they take in the hope of getting sex.

Even if I paid for the hotel I am not guaranteeing anyone sex. I don't do r*pe. I'm sorry you subscribe to that pov.

You seem to be having a problem reading what I'm writing. I said he won't be guaranteed sex, even if he's paid for your travel and the hotel. Where you're getting ra*e from I have no idea.

Because guaranteed sex when it's against someones will is r*pe.

I know. I didn't write anything like that. I said it's up to them if they want to take the chance on paying for expenses for a woman they may not get sex from. I didn't mention anything about them ra*ing the woman.

I am assuming thought that you are meeting them for sex, or they wouldn't need a hotel room and could meet you for a social at a local coffee shop.

In general yes, although I've had a couple of social meets in hotel bars which turned into us going to a room. That's actually a good halfway house I enjoy.

Coercing a guy who is not into a woman, touching him without consent to make him hard, sucking him off because you know his body will react is all r*pe, even if not legally defined as such.

Coercing a guy to a bedroom/hotel room touching him and sucking him off because you know he will react is r*pe???? What?!"

So is that consensual sex?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"it's something I'd ever do myself because I can afford to travel but I can understand why someone may ask for travel costs to be split if it meant going without electricity or gas or food for the week. Not everyone on this site has as much disposable income as the next person.

Also if the OP says the cost is very small then it probably does mean she needs that money for other, more important things and it could have possibly been quite difficult to ask for.

She could just go without sex instead.

Yes poor people should sacrifice all pleasures.

Nobody's saying that though are they?

What's being said in general is that people shouldn't expect to be paid to meet, or that people shouldn't cover their own costs.

What happens when one party is covering everything, paying for dinners, drinks, gifts, hotels, travel/taxis - and after however long you've been chatting for and getting along great, thinking you've clicked and that you're compatible - you meet. And they've paid your train fare, stumped up cash for a hotel, bought a bottle of champagne, maybe some nice lingerie they think you'd look good in. But when you meet you don't feel the same and the chemistry isn't there.

Do you think they won't still expect something sexual to happen? Do you think they may begrudge spending all that money for a quick drink and a goodbye?

An extreme example obviously. But when you start bringing money into the equation you put yourself in danger of being expected to fuck.

Not by all. But certainly by some.

A

I've had a meet where no sex happened. He paid for hotel, drinks and my taxis. He was reasonable when I told him I had to leave and he paid for my taxi home.

So if you're saying the person paying is expecting a guaranteed fuck then let's call out this behaviour instead of telling people 'they can go without sex'.

There are many reasons sex might not happen. To be honest, I'm sick and tired of men arranging meets with me and not taking care of their health and being tired and flaccid. But I accept that's the risk i take. I spend a lot of time and money and effort for every single one of my meets. Paying for a hotel and transport is the easiest thing a guy can do.

Why not equally call out the behaviour of expecting others to pay for your fun?

A

Because in my world I only have mutually pleasurable sex. No one pays me for sex. And neither do I have an issue with it. But I also don't bill guys for all the makeup, clothes, toys, lube, condoms, manis, pedis, laser and so on.

But let's only look at what the guys pays.

Wow.

Maybe guys should bill for gym memberships, haircuts, manicures and pedicures (because I hate to break it to you - men from to you know!), clothes, toys, condoms, lube.......ah fuck it. Of course men should pay for everything.......

A

As you are a feminist surely you want to be treated equally? Which must mean splitting the bills equally? You say you don’t expect to be paid for having sex but expecting to have everything paid for is just another way of being paid?

Just curious as it seems double standards?

In the words of MasterCard and L'Oréal......

Couple of drinks - £10

Condoms - £2

Lube - £2

Grooming - £you do that anyway, surely?

Making your own way to a meet - £variable but down to you

Hotel, dinner, champagne, lingerie, gifts, a.n.other that doesn't relate to simply meeting.... Priceless. Or not. For the guy it seems anyway.

But 'youre worth it'.......

A

I don't expect or ask a guy to take me for dinner. I'll get my own.

I don't even do socials before meets. I take time choosing who I meet and we build a good rapport.

I've never received gifts from a guy from fab. But offline in my own community it's a very normal thing for a guy to bring a gift to a date.

A hotel is essential for a fab meet. Where else would we have sex?

I specify that I'm looking for men who can accommodate. If that's in a hotel that's up to them. Some men live alone but accommodate in a hotel. I would never ask to meet a man in a hotel if I couldn't pay.

No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

You want to slate women who value their personal safety?

I haven't slated you. Meeting anyone anywhere who you don't know isn't 100% safe. If men are happy to offer to pay your expenses that's entirely their choice, abd if you tell them up front that they have to pay for travel and the hotel but they might not get sex, that's the chance they take in the hope of getting sex.

Even if I paid for the hotel I am not guaranteeing anyone sex. I don't do r*pe. I'm sorry you subscribe to that pov.

You seem to be having a problem reading what I'm writing. I said he won't be guaranteed sex, even if he's paid for your travel and the hotel. Where you're getting ra*e from I have no idea.

Because guaranteed sex when it's against someones will is r*pe.

I know. I didn't write anything like that. I said it's up to them if they want to take the chance on paying for expenses for a woman they may not get sex from. I didn't mention anything about them ra*ing the woman.

I am assuming thought that you are meeting them for sex, or they wouldn't need a hotel room and could meet you for a social at a local coffee shop.

In general yes, although I've had a couple of social meets in hotel bars which turned into us going to a room. That's actually a good halfway house I enjoy.

Coercing a guy who is not into a woman, touching him without consent to make him hard, sucking him off because you know his body will react is all r*pe, even if not legally defined as such.

Coercing a guy to a bedroom/hotel room touching him and sucking him off because you know he will react is r*pe???? What?!

So is that consensual sex?"

How many men do you think you could get up into a hotel room on your own without their consent? How many would let you suck their cock if they didn’t want you to? If you knocked him out or spiked his drink and then took advantage of him then yes I believe that would be classed as assault.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that."

Even as a big and strong man who can handle himself I don't feel 100% safe meeting women for the first time at their residence. I'm always on guard. I watch far too many serial killer documentaries and I believe that the swinging scene has a higher concentration of psychopaths who converge on this community for obvious reasons. Not saying I don't do it, but it definitely stays on my mind. Prefer a social first.

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

Even as a big and strong man who can handle himself I don't feel 100% safe meeting women for the first time at their residence. I'm always on guard. I watch far too many serial killer documentaries and I believe that the swinging scene has a higher concentration of psychopaths who converge on this community for obvious reasons. Not saying I don't do it, but it definitely stays on my mind. Prefer a social first. "

Anyone watch Luther last week? Just remember Alice....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Except I don't ask men to cover hotel and travel.

It's a condition of meeting me on my profile. I don't contact men and proposition them.

I find my conditions are also a really good filter for time wasters.

That is one angle to it. You know they will turn up if they have booked a hotel and sent you your travel money.

Do you ask for proof of the hotel booking and do you specify which hotel?

Men don't send me money, for travel or otherwise. I've never stated not insinuated that.

Sorry, I thought you said they gave you your travel money. That must have been someone else on the thread. It gets confusing when comments are copied and quoted.

No I said men pay for my Uber or taxi. I don't ask them for any money in advance. They just do it on their account. Or they book a local hotel.

What else do you expect them to supply for your night of enjoyment?

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you

If asked for all that I would be concerned that the people paying would expect sex, and I would have to be 100% sure I was going to give them sex.

I don't think so - I don't exchange money paid for a hotel room for sex. If you do, that's up to you."

You don't think you're asking for a lot in exchange for nothing?

I don't ask for anything from a man except his time, but I am here for sexual encounters, not what I can get from a man.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

Even as a big and strong man who can handle himself I don't feel 100% safe meeting women for the first time at their residence. I'm always on guard. I watch far too many serial killer documentaries and I believe that the swinging scene has a higher concentration of psychopaths who converge on this community for obvious reasons. Not saying I don't do it, but it definitely stays on my mind. Prefer a social first.

Anyone watch Luther last week? Just remember Alice.... "

I totally would have fucked Alice.

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you "

I find asking a man to pay for the taxis really strange, but the lady is clear in her profile - she wants a hotel and a taxi paid for, so her potential meets can decide to contact her or not - she has that right I believe, she's not trying to trick anyone, whereas is sounds like the OP might have been talking to a trickster.

I actually have an old-fashioned lady friend, a married swinger, who totally believes that the man should pay for everything and says 'No, they pay for your company!'. It takes all sorts.

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By *egasus NobMan  over a year ago

Merton

Do whatever you like nobody knows her situation here. Cover her cost or not is your choice between her and you, not us here.

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By *egasus NobMan  over a year ago

Merton


"No thanks. I'm not going to any strange guys house. Neutral ground all the way unless I know them previously. Especially in a world where violence against women is omnipresent. Decent guys get that.

Even as a big and strong man who can handle himself I don't feel 100% safe meeting women for the first time at their residence. I'm always on guard. I watch far too many serial killer documentaries and I believe that the swinging scene has a higher concentration of psychopaths who converge on this community for obvious reasons. Not saying I don't do it, but it definitely stays on my mind. Prefer a social first. "

I have met a few women at there place, the fear is usually in one's head. As long as you have good communication before hand.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi all ,

I’m just wondering what the general take is if a meet asks you to cover travel costs ,

I have a potential meet but she has asked me to cover her travel costs , on this occasion there fairly small she is varified and if she proves to be genuine then I personally don’t have any issue with it , I just wondered what the general thought was in this."

OP, are you comfortable in covering her travel costs ?

If you are, then do so, but with the explicit understanding that it does not guarantee sex

When meeting people I do so on terms that both I and the other party (or parties) are comfortable with

As others have said, it's not standard, but if it works for you both, go ahead

You could still end up having a wank later though

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" How many men do you think you could get up into a hotel room on your own without their consent? "

2 small ones if there was a lift.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I've been asked in the past by a smoking hot women off this site you all are in my opinion I did decline as I new that it was fake as I'm an ugly sod and defo not the type she had met or spoke to in the past

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you

I find asking a man to pay for the taxis really strange, but the lady is clear in her profile - she wants a hotel and a taxi paid for, so her potential meets can decide to contact her or not - she has that right I believe, she's not trying to trick anyone, whereas is sounds like the OP might have been talking to a trickster.

I actually have an old-fashioned lady friend, a married swinger, who totally believes that the man should pay for everything and says 'No, they pay for your company!'. It takes all sorts."

It does, but asking for stuff is not allowed on here. Being offered a hotel or taxi to the hotel is though. No one must gain from swinging.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman  over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"Cheeky mare I would never dream of that,if I couldn't afford the travelling costs I wouldn't go.

Being a million miles away, you're taxi bills must be horrific? "

I know right,it's a good job I'm a multi millionairess isn't it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Cheeky mare I would never dream of that,if I couldn't afford the travelling costs I wouldn't go.

Being a million miles away, you're taxi bills must be horrific?

I know right,it's a good job I'm a multi millionairess isn't it."

Spend some of those £'s coming over to Belfast. I would love to show you the sights and nightlife, amongst other things

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you

I find asking a man to pay for the taxis really strange, but the lady is clear in her profile - she wants a hotel and a taxi paid for, so her potential meets can decide to contact her or not - she has that right I believe, she's not trying to trick anyone, whereas is sounds like the OP might have been talking to a trickster.

I actually have an old-fashioned lady friend, a married swinger, who totally believes that the man should pay for everything and says 'No, they pay for your company!'. It takes all sorts.

It does, but asking for stuff is not allowed on here. Being offered a hotel or taxi to the hotel is though. No one must gain from swinging. "

Oh is it against the rules? Well she'll have to stop then.

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you

I find asking a man to pay for the taxis really strange, but the lady is clear in her profile - she wants a hotel and a taxi paid for, so her potential meets can decide to contact her or not - she has that right I believe, she's not trying to trick anyone, whereas is sounds like the OP might have been talking to a trickster.

I actually have an old-fashioned lady friend, a married swinger, who totally believes that the man should pay for everything and says 'No, they pay for your company!'. It takes all sorts.

It does, but asking for stuff is not allowed on here. Being offered a hotel or taxi to the hotel is though. No one must gain from swinging. "

I've just been given some CD's

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By *iamondCougarWoman  over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire


"Fuck

I’ll be making invoices and emailing them in due course "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you

I find asking a man to pay for the taxis really strange, but the lady is clear in her profile - she wants a hotel and a taxi paid for, so her potential meets can decide to contact her or not - she has that right I believe, she's not trying to trick anyone, whereas is sounds like the OP might have been talking to a trickster.

I actually have an old-fashioned lady friend, a married swinger, who totally believes that the man should pay for everything and says 'No, they pay for your company!'. It takes all sorts.

It does, but asking for stuff is not allowed on here. Being offered a hotel or taxi to the hotel is though. No one must gain from swinging.

Oh is it against the rules? Well she'll have to stop then."

yes, the site doesn't take kindly to asking for stuff.

I know of a couple who said they expect men to bring a bottle of something fizzy, and they don't mean lemonade.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you

I find asking a man to pay for the taxis really strange, but the lady is clear in her profile - she wants a hotel and a taxi paid for, so her potential meets can decide to contact her or not - she has that right I believe, she's not trying to trick anyone, whereas is sounds like the OP might have been talking to a trickster.

I actually have an old-fashioned lady friend, a married swinger, who totally believes that the man should pay for everything and says 'No, they pay for your company!'. It takes all sorts.

It does, but asking for stuff is not allowed on here. Being offered a hotel or taxi to the hotel is though. No one must gain from swinging.

I've just been given some CD's "

But did you ask for them. They are obsolete now and worth fuck all so I think you're ok.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman  over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"Cheeky mare I would never dream of that,if I couldn't afford the travelling costs I wouldn't go.

Being a million miles away, you're taxi bills must be horrific?

I know right,it's a good job I'm a multi millionairess isn't it.

Spend some of those £'s coming over to Belfast. I would love to show you the sights and nightlife, amongst other things "

Send us £500 and I'm there.

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By *iamondCougarWoman  over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Wow! That conversation got a bit hostile! I could feel the spit from here

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you

I find asking a man to pay for the taxis really strange, but the lady is clear in her profile - she wants a hotel and a taxi paid for, so her potential meets can decide to contact her or not - she has that right I believe, she's not trying to trick anyone, whereas is sounds like the OP might have been talking to a trickster.

I actually have an old-fashioned lady friend, a married swinger, who totally believes that the man should pay for everything and says 'No, they pay for your company!'. It takes all sorts.

It does, but asking for stuff is not allowed on here. Being offered a hotel or taxi to the hotel is though. No one must gain from swinging.

I've just been given some CD's

But did you ask for them. They are obsolete now and worth fuck all so I think you're ok.

"

Phew, good job I didn't ask for them though....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Wow! That conversation got a bit hostile! I could feel the spit from here "

Fascinating that

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I wouldn’t ask, though a meet did pay for a taxi last year for me as he wasn’t sure on the time he finished work so was better for me to wait in comfort at the hotel than hang around the station. But we had met before so wasn’t a first time thing. X

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"Cheeky mare I would never dream of that,if I couldn't afford the travelling costs I wouldn't go.

Being a million miles away, you're taxi bills must be horrific?

I know right,it's a good job I'm a multi millionairess isn't it.

Spend some of those £'s coming over to Belfast. I would love to show you the sights and nightlife, amongst other things

Send us £500 and I'm there."

You hoe.........!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you

I find asking a man to pay for the taxis really strange, but the lady is clear in her profile - she wants a hotel and a taxi paid for, so her potential meets can decide to contact her or not - she has that right I believe, she's not trying to trick anyone, whereas is sounds like the OP might have been talking to a trickster.

I actually have an old-fashioned lady friend, a married swinger, who totally believes that the man should pay for everything and says 'No, they pay for your company!'. It takes all sorts.

It does, but asking for stuff is not allowed on here. Being offered a hotel or taxi to the hotel is though. No one must gain from swinging.

Oh is it against the rules? Well she'll have to stop then.

yes, the site doesn't take kindly to asking for stuff.

I know of a couple who said they expect men to bring a bottle of something fizzy, and they don't mean lemonade. "

If I'm completely honest I don't see an issue with this.

If it is clear and on the profile then surely it is up to the individual that contacts the couple if they're prepared to do this. If they are not, then don't contact them. I think the biggest issue is people are so caught up on what everyone else is doing and actually just get on with what you want to do and enjoy it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Wow! That conversation got a bit hostile! I could feel the spit from here "

If that is aimed at me, I'm in a great mood and not being hostile at all.

Just saying it like it is on a swinging site

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Any meet that asks for travel money is not even worth meeting. Talking about low. Swinging is a lifestyle choice. Would you ask friends to chip in for your taxi costs of you were meeting up for dinner and drinks...I rest my case.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Never ever would i ask anyone for Travel Money. When i used to have a fuck Buddy he offered to pay for my taxi, I have never agreed. Always paid for myself.

If someone asked me i wouldn't meet them, it's weird x

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By *inful xWoman  over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

I wouldn't have the bottle to ask anyone to contribute to my travel costs if I couldn't afford to get there , I wouldn't be meeting. It's rather cheeky tbh

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By *gnitemybodyWoman  over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"Cheeky mare I would never dream of that,if I couldn't afford the travelling costs I wouldn't go.

Being a million miles away, you're taxi bills must be horrific?

I know right,it's a good job I'm a multi millionairess isn't it.

Spend some of those £'s coming over to Belfast. I would love to show you the sights and nightlife, amongst other things

Send us £500 and I'm there.

You hoe.........!!!"

I try to be!

In all seriousness I'm fed up of people thinking just because I have millions that I'm going to be the one that always pays for thing's. Well no flipping more.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

You can read my profile - it's all on there.

You don't ask for much do you

I find asking a man to pay for the taxis really strange, but the lady is clear in her profile - she wants a hotel and a taxi paid for, so her potential meets can decide to contact her or not - she has that right I believe, she's not trying to trick anyone, whereas is sounds like the OP might have been talking to a trickster.

I actually have an old-fashioned lady friend, a married swinger, who totally believes that the man should pay for everything and says 'No, they pay for your company!'. It takes all sorts.

It does, but asking for stuff is not allowed on here. Being offered a hotel or taxi to the hotel is though. No one must gain from swinging.

Oh is it against the rules? Well she'll have to stop then.

yes, the site doesn't take kindly to asking for stuff.

I know of a couple who said they expect men to bring a bottle of something fizzy, and they don't mean lemonade.

If I'm completely honest I don't see an issue with this.

If it is clear and on the profile then surely it is up to the individual that contacts the couple if they're prepared to do this. If they are not, then don't contact them. I think the biggest issue is people are so caught up on what everyone else is doing and actually just get on with what you want to do and enjoy it. "

The issue is with the site.

It's a swinging site and they don't like people asking for gifts. If it were allowed we would have ads for pay pigs, sugar moms/dad's, escorts and the likes, which isn't swinging.

It could encourage more people to offer money for sex too.

What happens between parties on here is there business, but it can affect others' experiences on here.

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"Cheeky mare I would never dream of that,if I couldn't afford the travelling costs I wouldn't go.

Being a million miles away, you're taxi bills must be horrific?

I know right,it's a good job I'm a multi millionairess isn't it.

Spend some of those £'s coming over to Belfast. I would love to show you the sights and nightlife, amongst other things

Send us £500 and I'm there.

You hoe.........!!!

I try to be!

In all seriousness I'm fed up of people thinking just because I have millions that I'm going to be the one that always pays for thing's. Well no flipping more."

Quite, make them pay for everything before they find out you're loaded and turn into greedy gold diggers.

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