FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I need your help please

I need your help please

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

My guy seems to be turned off. I'm starting to get really upset about it. What can I do to really excite him. I've bought some outfits n things buy 0 interest. He's got the easiest life ever so it's not like I'm a horrible person or anything. I have a very high sex drive and it's driving me crazy

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By *rightonsteveMan over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Stress reduces a guys mojo.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Well he is stressed with work

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Tell him you want to fuck his siblings!

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Is this a long term partner, or husband? A fuck buddy? How long have you been seeing him, and how often do you see him? I need context to give a proper answer

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Omg haha. I couldn't hes just horrible lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Is this a long term partner, or husband? A fuck buddy? How long have you been seeing him, and how often do you see him? I need context to give a proper answer

Been together almost 8 years. We live together & engaged with a kid

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Omg haha. I couldn't hes just horrible lol"
just tell him you want to! Dint actually do it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I go through patches like that....where humans give me a head ache not a hard on.

I can’t offer an explanation or suggestion of how to change the mood. I don’t know what changes mine.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I get where you’re coming from. We all have different levels of sex drive, we cope differently with stress. It’s harder for guys to perform when they’re under stress etc. It doesn’t mean he’s not happy or doesn’t love you if there are no other signs or issues with you both. Hugs xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Haha he knows i hate his bros guts lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I go through patches like that....where humans give me a head ache not a hard on.

I can’t offer an explanation or suggestion of how to change the mood. I don’t know what changes mine. "

Could just be a guy thing ?

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By *VineMan over a year ago

The right place

Try making him jealous, I’ll volunteer my services

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"My guy seems to be turned off. I'm starting to get really upset about it. What can I do to really excite him. I've bought some outfits n things buy 0 interest. He's got the easiest life ever so it's not like I'm a horrible person or anything. I have a very high sex drive and it's driving me crazy

Sorry to hear that you are having trouble with your man’s libido.

Could be any number of reasons.

How are things with in the relationship other than the bedroom department?

Have you tried talking to him to try and get to the bottom of things?

Is he active on Fab as well?

Maybe he’s feeling a little jealous or has his ‘nose put out’ a bit because you are active on here??

C x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have you asked him about it?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I get where you’re coming from. We all have different levels of sex drive, we cope differently with stress. It’s harder for guys to perform when they’re under stress etc. It doesn’t mean he’s not happy or doesn’t love you if there are no other signs or issues with you both. Hugs xx"

Thank you. It's just been so long. I know he has a couple of things stressing. I wish i could take it all away xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stress, lack of exercise, lack of weight training protein and avacados. Ashwaganda drops help increase sex drive. It may not be you. It could be a lower labido which over time can be increased by increasing the above.

If he isn't genuinely interested in sex it may be something that's worrying him and the pressure to give it to you causes more stress. It may sound weird but actually taking sex off the table and the pressure with it may help massevly.

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"Is this a long term partner, or husband? A fuck buddy? How long have you been seeing him, and how often do you see him? I need context to give a proper answer

Been together almost 8 years. We live together & engaged with a kid"

Have you spoken to him about how you're feeling? What does he say?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stress at work sounds like a valid cause - has he got any leave or days off coming up? If so, make some plans for stuff you know he likes and try to make him forget about work, even if it's just for a day or two.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Sorry to hear that you are having trouble with your man’s libido.

Could be any number of reasons.

How are things with in the relationship other than the bedroom department?

Have you tried talking to him to try and get to the bottom of things?

Is he active on Fab as well?

Maybe he’s feeling a little jealous or has his ‘nose put out’ a bit because you are active on here??

C x

We get on great. We used to have major bust ups but got through it and we are stronger than ever. We had lots of fun afterwards but now, nothing. I've tried talking but nothing seems to change. He's not on fab x

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By *onticusMan over a year ago

Greater London

Perhaps look for another girl and turn it into a threesome... if that won’t get his attention, than there’s an issue...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Stress, lack of exercise, lack of weight training protein and avacados. Ashwaganda drops help increase sex drive. It may not be you. It could be a lower labido which over time can be increased by increasing the above.

Oh where do i get this ashwaganda stuff ? I'm interested xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Is this a long term partner, or husband? A fuck buddy? How long have you been seeing him, and how often do you see him? I need context to give a proper answer

Been together almost 8 years. We live together & engaged with a kid

Have you spoken to him about how you're feeling? What does he say? "

He always says hes just tired

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Stress at work sounds like a valid cause - has he got any leave or days off coming up? If so, make some plans for stuff you know he likes and try to make him forget about work, even if it's just for a day or two."

He's off work atm. Getting a baby sitter over the weekend and going out so maybe that will help

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Buy him a PS4...it’s the must have gift to occupy his hands.

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By *layfullsamMan over a year ago

Solihull

Make a couples profile and involve him ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

He's off work atm. Getting a baby sitter over the weekend and going out so maybe that will help "

Is he off work over Xmas, or another reason? Sometimes men can feel a bit "useless" if they're not working.

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By *ilth500Man over a year ago

Merseyside

He's off work atm. Getting a baby sitter over the weekend and going out so maybe that will help "

if stress is the problem then maybe try a hotel spa day?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Buy him a PS4...it’s the must have gift to occupy his hands.

I got him an atari for Xmas. He's buzzing with it lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Make a couples profile and involve him ?"

I could ask him

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

try some Viagra .?? does he know yo are on fab

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

8 years.

living together and with a child.

hard to know what to say.

i wish you all the best.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Is he off work over Xmas, or another reason? Sometimes men can feel a bit "useless" if they're not working."

Off for Xmas and new year.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"if stress is the problem then maybe try a hotel spa day? "

I've offered that but he's like no way

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is he off work over Xmas, or another reason? Sometimes men can feel a bit "useless" if they're not working.

Off for Xmas and new year. "

Ok, did the "problem" start before this?

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By *bi HaiveMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset

Find a hot chick on here, book them a room together at a nice hotel and send him a text to say to meet you there

When he turns up and finds a naked hottie that isn't you waiting for him in bed you'll find out if he's lost his mojo or not.

Maybe he's got a profile on here and is just shagged out from endless meets?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"if stress is the problem then maybe try a hotel spa day?

I've offered that but he's like no way"

A spa day would do absolutely nothing for me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"try some Viagra .?? does he know yo are on fab"

Got some but he wont take it and I've said about it but don't think he believes me

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"8 years.

living together and with a child.

hard to know what to say.

i wish you all the best.

Thank u

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Is he off work over Xmas, or another reason? Sometimes men can feel a bit "useless" if they're not working.

Off for Xmas and new year.

Ok, did the "problem" start before this?"

Yes been a few months

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So your 30

Been together 8 years so 22

Your on fab looking for men and he's not

Does he like or want you to see other men ?

Maybe just get a FB

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Find a hot chick on here, book them a room together at a nice hotel and send him a text to say to meet you there

When he turns up and finds a naked hottie that isn't you waiting for him in bed you'll find out if he's lost his mojo or not.

Maybe he's got a profile on here and is just shagged out from endless meets?

I don't think he has. He's either at work or with me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

All I can offer is, you know him best, you know what gets him going - do that, but x 100 in effort etc. Are you able to make any of his fantasies happen?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"So your 30

Been together 8 years so 22

Your on fab looking for men and he's not

Does he like or want you to see other men ?

Maybe just get a FB "

He said before he wanted to get his friend to fuck me but I was scared

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By *axxxcMan over a year ago

South Yorkshire

If he's not feeling up for it because of stress or something then any suggestion to have sex might make him feel under pressure and make it worse. Maybe offer to give him a massage to relax him and be a bit naughty with it, if he 'responds' and something happens then I'm sure he'll feel better for it too.

All the best, In hope things change for you both soon.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Buy him a PS4...it’s the must have gift to occupy his hands.

I got him an atari for Xmas. He's buzzing with it lol"

And did he get you a ‘joystick’ too?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"All I can offer is, you know him best, you know what gets him going - do that, but x 100 in effort etc. Are you able to make any of his fantasies happen?"

I can try make it. Giving it my all tonight. If it doesnt work I'm going to have a breakdown

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"If he's not feeling up for it because of stress or something then any suggestion to have sex might make him feel under pressure and make it worse. Maybe offer to give him a massage to relax him and be a bit naughty with it, if he 'responds' and something happens then I'm sure he'll feel better for it too.

All the best, In hope things change for you both soon.

Thank you

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By *bi HaiveMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Find a hot chick on here, book them a room together at a nice hotel and send him a text to say to meet you there

When he turns up and finds a naked hottie that isn't you waiting for him in bed you'll find out if he's lost his mojo or not.

Maybe he's got a profile on here and is just shagged out from endless meets?

I don't think he has. He's either at work or with me "

Unless you go to work with him he could be anywhere.

Maybe he's caught 'the ghey'?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Buy him a PS4...it’s the must have gift to occupy his hands.

I got him an atari for Xmas. He's buzzing with it lol

And did he get you a ‘joystick’ too?

Haha too funny

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Find a hot chick on here, book them a room together at a nice hotel and send him a text to say to meet you there

When he turns up and finds a naked hottie that isn't you waiting for him in bed you'll find out if he's lost his mojo or not.

Maybe he's got a profile on here and is just shagged out from endless meets?

I don't think he has. He's either at work or with me

Unless you go to work with him he could be anywhere.

Maybe he's caught 'the ghey'?

Ghey? I know he's there. I'm not far from there. We are so close I know he is

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You list some interests that you could gently introduce just between the two of you, if you don't already? Ask him if he's curious to try anything new. Communication solves many problems.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Don't beg anyone to have sex with you. Give him some space and enjoy it when he wants to x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I don't I drop hints n hes like haha later. Later comes and he sleeps

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By *iamondCougarWoman over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Sounds like depression.... absolutely kills sex drive

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By *bi HaiveMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Find a hot chick on here, book them a room together at a nice hotel and send him a text to say to meet you there

When he turns up and finds a naked hottie that isn't you waiting for him in bed you'll find out if he's lost his mojo or not.

Maybe he's got a profile on here and is just shagged out from endless meets?

I don't think he has. He's either at work or with me

Unless you go to work with him he could be anywhere.

Maybe he's caught 'the ghey'?

Ghey? I know he's there. I'm not far from there. We are so close I know he is"

Does he have a secretary?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't I drop hints n hes like haha later. Later comes and he sleeps"

Wake him up with a blow job..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"All I can offer is, you know him best, you know what gets him going - do that, but x 100 in effort etc. Are you able to make any of his fantasies happen?

I can try make it. Giving it my all tonight. If it doesnt work I'm going to have a breakdown"

If he picks up on that vibe, it'll affect him even more. Worry and stress go straight to a guy's hard-on - he may even have added not being able to fuck you to his list of woes.

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By *adtaffladMan over a year ago

Rhyl

Stress is hard to cope with as a partner and you don't know how to help them . Try giving him a some quality time with no pressure that he has to perform as that can bring its own stress . Just sit there massageing his shoulders and go with the flow it may take a while though hun . I know I was the stressed one and I sincerely hope it works out hun x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So your 30

Been together 8 years so 22

Your on fab looking for men and he's not

Does he like or want you to see other men ?

Maybe just get a FB

He said before he wanted to get his friend to fuck me but I was scared"

So why are you on here . Are you him lol

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By *bi HaiveMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset

OP if you'd been a single guy who'd stated they were worried about their partners lack of sex drive you'd have been advised by all (or at least most) to talk to them and probably step away from Fab. (Option 1)

But you have boobies.

So you're getting different responses.

I was hanging around to see the first post advising the above but as it hasn't arrived I thought I'd step in.

Alternatively it could be anything causing it.

He could be worried his other half is banging randoms on a swingers site and that he's obviously not enough for them.

He could be shagging his secretary at work.

He could be off women and into men

He could be on here himself and just tired.

The possibilities are endless.

Only he will know. Which brings us back to option 1.

Or just fill your boots on here as you'll have no problem finding willing men to meet you. Which is fine.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Turning someone on that’s just not feeling it is difficult, and almost impossible.

I on the other hand, am always on standby,.. sleep mode... just a slight touch and I power up quickly.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Talk to him

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Sounds like depression.... absolutely kills sex drive "
I've thought that too

how do I bring him round x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sounds like depression.... absolutely kills sex drive I've thought that too

how do I bring him round x"

You can’t really. All you can do is support him and encourage him to seek the help he needs.

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By *irky_coupleCouple over a year ago

kirky

Hope you get something sorted OP but the hypocrisy on here is astounding. A guy posted something like this not that long ago and the very first reply was " show her your profile on here". A woman asks it and its totally different responses.

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By *ficouldMan over a year ago

a quandary, could you change my mind?

Perhaps you are to often for him to understand?

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By *adtaffladMan over a year ago

Rhyl

"Sounds like depression.... absolutely kills sex drive I've thought that too

how do I bring him round x"

It's difficult hun you need to be patient and see it he will see his doctor or a counceler I know it is embarrassing especially for a man to admit they need some help I've been there

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"Hope you get something sorted OP but the hypocrisy on here is astounding. A guy posted something like this not that long ago and the very first reply was " show her your profile on here". A woman asks it and its totally different responses.

Its only hypocrisy if its the same people replying

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

How old is he if you don't mind me asking and has it been going on a while?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Tell him you want to fuck his siblings! "

lol!!!!... tremendous

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

I'd go for softly softly catchi monkey...somehow you got to allow him to feel he needs your arms round him and want to love you..rather than your gagging for sex...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sounds like depression.... absolutely kills sex drive I've thought that too

how do I bring him round x"

Ask him straight up. Ask for a few ideas that really turn him on about you. Then ask what fantasies turn him on. Find out what he thinks is sexy.

Just talk, start slowly again, it’s hard to hit the ground running every single time.

*im not a psychiatrist

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