FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Too good looking.
Too good looking.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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This isn’t a look at me post as my face pics are private, but do you think people who decline to meet because “you’re too good looking” mean it or are they just saying their not interested in the most flattering way possible? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think some mean it for sure.
There are lots of people who are others as "out of their league" as they put it.
When I first started talking to B I thought that about him, really didn't think he'd look twice. Since then I've discovered it's him that's punching  
P |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This isn’t a look at me post as my face pics are private, but do you think people who decline to meet because “you’re too good looking” mean it or are they just saying their not interested in the most flattering way possible? "
Means your need to play in your own league |
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"do you think people who decline to meet because “you’re too good looking” mean it or are they just saying their not interested in the most flattering way possible? "
I now what you mean OP, it's so frustrating. And even when I say "it's ok you're only half a minger" they still won't give in   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I guess, but half the time I’ve never even seen their face, so can’t comment.
On the other hand, I get plenty of folk saying that I’m not their type. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've done that quite a few times in the early days and meant it... it's a self confidence thing until you realise different men like all shapes and sizes. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've done that quite a few times in the early days and meant it... it's a self confidence thing until you realise different men like all shapes and sizes. "
This must be the reason |
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"We must be munters as we’ve never had this said to us 
You must just choose more wisely!
Your pics are amazing "
Mr P is very particular with his women! 9/10 if I like a man in a couple , he won’t like the lady ! Means we don’t play often .
And thank you for the compliment
Miss |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I’m sure there are a variety of reasons why people say it or think it OP. It’s best just to move on. "
Don’t worry, I’m not one of the 95% of guys who’ll hound someone til blocked. Just asking out of curiosity |
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"do you think people who decline to meet because “you’re too good looking” mean it or are they just saying their not interested in the most flattering way possible?
I now what you mean OP, it's so frustrating. And even when I say "it's ok you're only half a minger" they still won't give in "
*know  |
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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago
.. |
"I’m sure there are a variety of reasons why people say it or think it OP. It’s best just to move on.
Don’t worry, I’m not one of the 95% of guys who’ll hound someone til blocked. Just asking out of curiosity"
I didn’t think you would be  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I used to lack confidence in my looks when i first joined up now i dont worry about it having a face like bigfoot has its plus points like scaring guard dogs and gangs of teens |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think some mean it for sure.
There are lots of people who are others as "out of their league" as they put it.
When I first started talking to B I thought that about him, really didn't think he'd look twice. Since then I've discovered it's him that's punching
P"
Only because I've told you perhaps a thousand times how lovely I think you are and sooner or later it was bound to sink in, even with you...
B |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I guess, but half the time I’ve never even seen their face, so can’t comment.
On the other hand, I get plenty of folk saying that I’m not their type.
Curious to see your face pics now op!  "
Curiosity sated hopefully. You’ll see I’m particularly average |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
Sometimes it's a "nice" excuse, or a sign of low confidence. It's difficult to know why unless you ask them directly (but a no is a no and some won't like that). Just see it as a compliment either way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think some mean it for sure.
There are lots of people who are others as "out of their league" as they put it.
When I first started talking to B I thought that about him, really didn't think he'd look twice. Since then I've discovered it's him that's punching
P
Only because I've told you perhaps a thousand times how lovely I think you are and sooner or later it was bound to sink in, even with you...
B"
you calling me thick ya swine?
Ok ok, I can't have it all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think some mean it for sure.
There are lots of people who are others as "out of their league" as they put it.
When I first started talking to B I thought that about him, really didn't think he'd look twice. Since then I've discovered it's him that's punching
P
Only because I've told you perhaps a thousand times how lovely I think you are and sooner or later it was bound to sink in, even with you...
B
you calling me thick ya swine?
Ok ok, I can't have it all "
someone has to |
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"Some mean it, some are using flattery to soften a refusal.
Well worded, it's almost like the sign in yer local shop that says "Please Don't Ask For Credit As Refusal Often Offends" "
You don't see that nowadays.
Another one a guy told us he often gets is "you look too much like my brother".
Not when he asks for credit obviously |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Sometimes it's a "nice" excuse, or a sign of low confidence. It's difficult to know why unless you ask them directly (but a no is a no and some won't like that). Just see it as a compliment either way."
I hope for their sakes it’s not down to confidence.
I actually hate taking selfies, so my pics aren’t amazing, so if it is a confidence thing, they must feel pretty low |
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"Sometimes it's a "nice" excuse, or a sign of low confidence. It's difficult to know why unless you ask them directly (but a no is a no and some won't like that). Just see it as a compliment either way.
I hope for their sakes it’s not down to confidence.
I actually hate taking selfies, so my pics aren’t amazing, so if it is a confidence thing, they must feel pretty low"
There are plenty of people on here who talk in terms of leagues where looks are concerned. |
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By *rOralMan
over a year ago
Dublin |
"I get asked to send a face pic which I don't mind but then the message thread gets deleted and never hear from them again. Makes me think I'm ugly tbh  "
I feel you on that. Its quite difficult to actually past to the messages stage since my plainspoken profile its the main filter. However, after face pic is sent, thread goes silenced... and most of times I get no responses at all or sometimes I get a polite one implying a “sorry not my type”. I guess The reason for this is that I don’t look my age, I look a lot younger. So yeah that sucks haha |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I get asked to send a face pic which I don't mind but then the message thread gets deleted and never hear from them again. Makes me think I'm ugly tbh
I feel you on that. Its quite difficult to actually past to the messages stage since my plainspoken profile its the main filter. However, after face pic is sent, thread goes silenced... and most of times I get no responses at all or sometimes I get a polite one implying a “sorry not my type”. I guess The reason for this is that I don’t look my age, I look a lot younger. So yeah that sucks haha"
This is quite normal. The worst is receiving a very enthusiastic message to then reply with face pics only to get blocked with no reply. Happens loads! |
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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago
Craggy Island |
"This isn’t a look at me post as my face pics are private, but do you think people who decline to meet because “you’re too good looking” mean it or are they just saying their not interested in the most flattering way possible? "
Yes of course their are. |
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"There are plenty of people on here who talk in terms of leagues where looks are concerned.
What, you mean they big themselves up?
I'm better looking than Muhammad Ali  "
No to put themselves down. I often see threads saying people, normally women, feel that certain men are "out of their league" and even though these men make the first move they turn them down because they don't feel good enough. |
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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago
The Land that time forgot (Norfolk) |
I had zero confidence when I joined fab, years of rejection makes you believe you must be repulsive to all women.
The ladies I've met through fab and one in particular have helped me to love myself again (some may say too much )
If someone told me I was too good looking when I first joined here I would never have believed it and told myself they were taking the piss because I was unattractive. Now I might believe it.
It still may not be true but it's a lot better for my confidence to just accept it and move on.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I guess, but half the time I’ve never even seen their face, so can’t comment.
On the other hand, I get plenty of folk saying that I’m not their type. "
I've said it to a lot of people and I've always meant it. I hate it when they then ask for a pic when I already said no. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had zero confidence when I joined fab, years of rejection makes you believe you must be repulsive to all women.
The ladies I've met through fab and one in particular have helped me to love myself again (some may say too much )
If someone told me I was too good looking when I first joined here I would never have believed it and told myself they were taking the piss because I was unattractive. Now I might believe it.
It still may not be true but it's a lot better for my confidence to just accept it and move on.
"
That was beautiful  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had zero confidence when I joined fab, years of rejection makes you believe you must be repulsive to all women.
The ladies I've met through fab and one in particular have helped me to love myself again (some may say too much )
If someone told me I was too good looking when I first joined here I would never have believed it and told myself they were taking the piss because I was unattractive. Now I might believe it.
It still may not be true but it's a lot better for my confidence to just accept it and move on.
"
I'm really surprised you had zero confidence, you come across as confident.
At my first Manc social you talked to me for a bit because I was on my own and you have no idea how much I appreciated that. You have the quality of making people feel at ease. You're a good egg. |
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"There are plenty of people on here who talk in terms of leagues where looks are concerned.
What, you mean they big themselves up?
I'm better looking than Muhammad Ali
No to put themselves down. I often see threads saying people, normally women, feel that certain men are "out of their league" and even though these men make the first move they turn them down because they don't feel good enough."
Oh ok, it's a sad state of affairs then if women feel the need to put blokes down for their esthetical values. We would all have a hard time meeting if that was the case! |
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"I had zero confidence when I joined fab, years of rejection makes you believe you must be repulsive to all women.
The ladies I've met through fab and one in particular have helped me to love myself again (some may say too much )
If someone told me I was too good looking when I first joined here I would never have believed it and told myself they were taking the piss because I was unattractive. Now I might believe it.
It still may not be true but it's a lot better for my confidence to just accept it and move on.
"
You are very good looking |
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"There are plenty of people on here who talk in terms of leagues where looks are concerned.
What, you mean they big themselves up?
I'm better looking than Muhammad Ali
No to put themselves down. I often see threads saying people, normally women, feel that certain men are "out of their league" and even though these men make the first move they turn them down because they don't feel good enough.
Oh ok, it's a sad state of affairs then if women feel the need to put blokes down for their esthetical values. We would all have a hard time meeting if that was the case! "
No the women are putting themselves down. I didn't word it well. The women think they aren't good enough for the men because they (the men) are too good looking. |
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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago
The Land that time forgot (Norfolk) |
"I had zero confidence when I joined fab, years of rejection makes you believe you must be repulsive to all women.
The ladies I've met through fab and one in particular have helped me to love myself again (some may say too much )
If someone told me I was too good looking when I first joined here I would never have believed it and told myself they were taking the piss because I was unattractive. Now I might believe it.
It still may not be true but it's a lot better for my confidence to just accept it and move on.
I'm really surprised you had zero confidence, you come across as confident.
At my first Manc social you talked to me for a bit because I was on my own and you have no idea how much I appreciated that. You have the quality of making people feel at ease. You're a good egg. "
Thank you
I could always make conversation due to my line of work but you are very easy to talk to.
My lack of confidence was purely about my looks, that's what has been rebuilt since I first joined here. |
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This site is about having sex in fantasy and sexy situations. If there’s someone here you fancy and is in your eyes very hot there’s no reason why you wouldn’t meet them if they are asking you too.
So anyone that is in here in our opinion that says this isn’t here for the right reasons . |
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By *rOralMan
over a year ago
Dublin |
"Sometimes it's a "nice" excuse, or a sign of low confidence. It's difficult to know why unless you ask them directly (but a no is a no and some won't like that). Just see it as a compliment either way.
I hope for their sakes it’s not down to confidence.
I actually hate taking selfies, so my pics aren’t amazing, so if it is a confidence thing, they must feel pretty low"
Actually I believe it is a matter of confidence. Happens evenly between girls and lads. However, I’m afraid girls tend to be more affected by it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We’ve not had it said to us not surprising. And it’s something I’ve not said but have wondered why some people want to meet us when they look as though they could have the pick of the site x |
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"There are plenty of people on here who talk in terms of leagues where looks are concerned.
What, you mean they big themselves up?
I'm better looking than Muhammad Ali
No to put themselves down. I often see threads saying people, normally women, feel that certain men are "out of their league" and even though these men make the first move they turn them down because they don't feel good enough.
Oh ok, it's a sad state of affairs then if women feel the need to put blokes down for their esthetical values. We would all have a hard time meeting if that was the case!
No the women are putting themselves down. I didn't word it well. The women think they aren't good enough for the men because they (the men) are too good looking. "
I know, I was only having a Giraffe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I guess, but half the time I’ve never even seen their face, so can’t comment.
On the other hand, I get plenty of folk saying that I’m not their type.
Curious to see your face pics now op!
Curiosity sated hopefully. You’ll see I’m particularly average"
Give up! I’ve met you and you’re a hunk
Don’t try to second guess people; they are weird. |
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"There are plenty of people on here who talk in terms of leagues where looks are concerned.
What, you mean they big themselves up?
I'm better looking than Muhammad Ali
No to put themselves down. I often see threads saying people, normally women, feel that certain men are "out of their league" and even though these men make the first move they turn them down because they don't feel good enough.
Oh ok, it's a sad state of affairs then if women feel the need to put blokes down for their esthetical values. We would all have a hard time meeting if that was the case!
No the women are putting themselves down. I didn't word it well. The women think they aren't good enough for the men because they (the men) are too good looking.
I know, I was only having a Giraffe "
Oh . It's boxing day, I've eaten more chocolate today than in the whole of the rest of the month and I accidentally sent a very rude whatsapp to our daughter this morning just before her and her partner arrived for lunch. I'm not doing too well so far |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I first joined fab I regularly sent that kind of message back because I genuinely thought I wasnt good enough for them. I worried that once they saw all of me they would reject me so I protected myself from that rejection before it happened. Funnily enough, one of the guys who I sent this message to, sent me another message a few weeks later and by then my confidence had grown a little. Met him and he's now my fwb. Never in a million years would I have approached him in a bar. I thank my lucky stars that I get to play with such a handsome and naughty man. |
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"There are plenty of people on here who talk in terms of leagues where looks are concerned.
What, you mean they big themselves up?
I'm better looking than Muhammad Ali
No to put themselves down. I often see threads saying people, normally women, feel that certain men are "out of their league" and even though these men make the first move they turn them down because they don't feel good enough.
Oh ok, it's a sad state of affairs then if women feel the need to put blokes down for their esthetical values. We would all have a hard time meeting if that was the case!
No the women are putting themselves down. I didn't word it well. The women think they aren't good enough for the men because they (the men) are too good looking.
I know, I was only having a Giraffe
Oh . It's boxing day, I've eaten more chocolate today than in the whole of the rest of the month and I accidentally sent a very rude whatsapp to our daughter this morning just before her and her partner arrived for lunch. I'm not doing too well so far "
Ooops, I told ma cousin a few things that I might have let slip on another occasion last night |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
"I guess, but half the time I’ve never even seen their face, so can’t comment.
On the other hand, I get plenty of folk saying that I’m not their type.
Curious to see your face pics now op! "
Me too lol it’s very rare I find a guy seriously good looking so intrigued that somebody would say you are too good looking to meet, I want to see |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve turned people down on the basis that I can’t imagine why anyone who looked like them would want to have sex with me. I agree with the comments that have said it’s a self-confidence thing, I can’t get past it though
Mrs F x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've not had that but I've been told I'm too good for this site which has actually offended me as whats he saying about the other woman on here. "
I wouldn't take it to heart or stress over it you get dozens of guys saying that there is one that pastes it to all the profiles on line I just don't think they really realise what they are saying. |
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"This isn’t a look at me post as my face pics are private, but do you think people who decline to meet because “you’re too good looking” mean it or are they just saying their not interested in the most flattering way possible? "
Maybe you should ask them OP. |
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"I've not had that but I've been told I'm too good for this site which has actually offended me as whats he saying about the other woman on here. "
Yeah we've had that sometimes. They must think we came down with the last shower. |
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"I've not had that but I've been told I'm too good for this site which has actually offended me as whats he saying about the other woman on here.
I wouldn't take it to heart or stress over it you get dozens of guys saying that there is one that pastes it to all the profiles on line I just don't think they really realise what they are saying. "
I think that some blokes are trying too hard by saying that you are too good for this site, there are plenty of gorgeous looking women walking round most town centres or every village in the world, too gorgeous? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve turned people down on the basis that I can’t imagine why anyone who looked like them would want to have sex with me. I agree with the comments that have said it’s a self-confidence thing, I can’t get past it though
Mrs F x"
Yup, same. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I guess, but half the time I’ve never even seen their face, so can’t comment.
On the other hand, I get plenty of folk saying that I’m not their type.
Curious to see your face pics now op! "
You and me both !! |
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"I guess, but half the time I’ve never even seen their face, so can’t comment.
On the other hand, I get plenty of folk saying that I’m not their type.
Curious to see your face pics now op!
You and me both !!"
He sent them to me. Not ‘too good looking ‘ - but certainly nice enough! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It could be a lack of confidence on their part OP. I'm sure some will also use it to soften the blow, if they decide to not take things further. It's a much kinder form of rejection |
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"I guess, but half the time I’ve never even seen their face, so can’t comment.
On the other hand, I get plenty of folk saying that I’m not their type.
Curious to see your face pics now op!
You and me both !!
He sent them to me. Not ‘too good looking ‘ - but certainly nice enough! "
Ah feck off, you've just got a sexy arse Missus |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well nobody has ever said that to me and if they ever did I’d know full bloody well that they’d be lying!
But I can get where they might be coming from OP, there are some ladies that I think ‘there’s no way I can compete with the type she could attract’ based on either their looks or the people they’ve met. So it might be genuine. Or, as some have suggested, a tactful and ego-boosting way of simply saying ‘no, not for me’. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've done that quite a few times in the early days and meant it... it's a self confidence thing until you realise different men like all shapes and sizes. "
This is what I need to realise. When they message I think, why me?... lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've done that quite a few times in the early days and meant it... it's a self confidence thing until you realise different men like all shapes and sizes.
This is what I need to realise. When they message I think, why me?... lol "
Seems a lot of us do exactly the same. I blame the online thing.. still so much easier to connect with someone in the flesh |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Iv been intimidated from time to time but wouldnt turn them down tho
Intimidated? In what sense though? "
normally that there too smart or popular as in with lots of friends in a club say for example or classy for me i do realise its my own issue tho but its mainly if i meet them without really getting to know them a bit first its my brain issue i have sometimes but it woulnt stop me meeting or getting to know them its like a first impression thing |
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"Iv been intimidated from time to time but wouldnt turn them down tho
Intimidated? In what sense though? normally that there too smart or popular as in with lots of friends in a club say for example or classy for me i do realise its my own issue tho but its mainly if i meet them without really getting to know them a bit first its my brain issue i have sometimes but it woulnt stop me meeting or getting to know them its like a first impression thing"
Yeah, but obviously you get to "know" people before you actually meet them in real life. Do you speak to them on the phone beforehand? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Iv been intimidated from time to time but wouldnt turn them down tho
Intimidated? In what sense though? normally that there too smart or popular as in with lots of friends in a club say for example or classy for me i do realise its my own issue tho but its mainly if i meet them without really getting to know them a bit first its my brain issue i have sometimes but it woulnt stop me meeting or getting to know them its like a first impression thing
Yeah, but obviously you get to "know" people before you actually meet them in real life. Do you speak to them on the phone beforehand? "
generally just messages phone on occasion but not always get to know them some folk prefer to speak in person than on phone or messages |
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"Iv been intimidated from time to time but wouldnt turn them down tho
Intimidated? In what sense though? normally that there too smart or popular as in with lots of friends in a club say for example or classy for me i do realise its my own issue tho but its mainly if i meet them without really getting to know them a bit first its my brain issue i have sometimes but it woulnt stop me meeting or getting to know them its like a first impression thing
Yeah, but obviously you get to "know" people before you actually meet them in real life. Do you speak to them on the phone beforehand? generally just messages phone on occasion but not always get to know them some folk prefer to speak in person than on phone or messages"
If I have a meet arranged, I make sure that we always speak on the phone first, I don't like funny accents |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This isn’t a look at me post as my face pics are private, but do you think people who decline to meet because “you’re too good looking” mean it or are they just saying their not interested in the most flattering way possible? "
Probably both OP. |
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I’m always surprised how many out of my league guys usually contact me. Never turn them down because they are out of my league usually there is no connection just in swapping messages or they get too pushy. I always make sure they see it all before meeting as there is no surprises and unrealistic expectations |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This isn’t a look at me post as my face pics are private, but do you think people who decline to meet because “you’re too good looking” mean it or are they just saying their not interested in the most flattering way possible? "
I can safely say this has never, ever happened to me. If they did say I’d know they are taking the piss. |
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