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Wife charging for sex
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Afternoon boys and girls, talking to a work mate today in our break who has been a bit down lately. He's confessed to me his wife has started charging him for sex over the past couple of months and we're not talking a few quid either! We're talking working girl rates and it's got the guy depressed. His wife has a career of her own and it's not as if they are short of money, he's asked her what she does with the money and she answered it goes in a "rainy day" fund incase she ever wants to leave! My advice to him was to ask himself if that was love? And if it wasn't would he be better off getting a divorce? I didn't really know what else to say so what would you have said or do in this situation? |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Tell him to start charging her by the inch.
Play her at her own game.
A if it was me I'd make a trip to the solicitors.. "
Maybe she's actually using it as a savings scheme to treat him to something nice for Xmas?
If it's true and he's not just spinning you a yarn, then he's a mug for handing the cash over in the first place. Tell him to buy her a vibrator for Xmas. It'll be cheaper in the long run and he'll have plenty of spare cash to spend on cheap hookers and beer.
A |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Talk to her, assess if individual or couples counselling is a realistic option, start seriously considering separation. "
I've noticed when we've been out in a group that she talks down to him and mocks him a fair bit when she's d*unk I think that alone would be enough for me! I understand they've been together afar while tho.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Talk to her, assess if individual or couples counselling is a realistic option, start seriously considering separation. I've noticed when we've been out in a group that she talks down to him and mocks him a fair bit when she's d*unk I think that alone would be enough for me! I understand they've been together afar while tho. "
You don't know her side.
He could make her feel like he's using her, hence her thinking fuck it, I'll make the most of the situation and actually get something for myself out of it.
There's clearly issues there and her talking down or mocking him when she's had a drink could be that she's getting a bit brave because of Dutch courage and saying things that she wouldn't normally (just would think or say under her breath rather than voice out loud)
I'd say there's bitterness and resentment there.
Or she's a cunt.
Who knows. Until you have all sides of the story, you'll never know.
P |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Bang out of order pun intended.
Its not one and it's disrespectful. He needs to leave  "
I agree! That's not love and respect its using your partner to line your nest. He's welcome to stay with me till he finds his feet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A rainy day fund in case you need to leave is a thing, but it's usually a secret in instances like abuse. I can't fathom rubbing it in someone's face. "
That's what I thought. It almost sounds like she's letting him know she's aware things aren't right, and gaining confidence.
P |
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"A rainy day fund in case you need to leave is a thing, but it's usually a secret in instances like abuse. I can't fathom rubbing it in someone's face.
That's what I thought. It almost sounds like she's letting him know she's aware things aren't right, and gaining confidence.
P"
Maybe. My gaining confidence would probably look like sneaking stuff out of the house that there's a risk of someone noticing and reaching out to support networks to leave.
This just sounds like emotional manipulation and contempt. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A rainy day fund in case you need to leave is a thing, but it's usually a secret in instances like abuse. I can't fathom rubbing it in someone's face.
That's what I thought. It almost sounds like she's letting him know she's aware things aren't right, and gaining confidence.
P
Maybe. My gaining confidence would probably look like sneaking stuff out of the house that there's a risk of someone noticing and reaching out to support networks to leave.
This just sounds like emotional manipulation and contempt. "
Possibly. When I was with my ex I got to the point I didn't care anymore. If we were with his mates I'd make sly comments in a hope they'd see him for what he really was. I was gonna get shit whether I kept my mouth shut or whether I spoke up, so I kinda thought fuck it, I'm past giving a shit, as peace keeping doesn't work.
I had no support network, not really. I was crying out for help but didn't know where to turn.
P |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"A rainy day fund in case you need to leave is a thing, but it's usually a secret in instances like abuse. I can't fathom rubbing it in someone's face.
That's what I thought. It almost sounds like she's letting him know she's aware things aren't right, and gaining confidence.
P
Maybe. My gaining confidence would probably look like sneaking stuff out of the house that there's a risk of someone noticing and reaching out to support networks to leave.
This just sounds like emotional manipulation and contempt. "
sounds like contempt to me too. I've known the guy years and he's a decent bloke does his best as a husband ect doesn't go out on the drink with the lads and takes all the overtime he can. He doesn't even come camping anymore as he gets too much grief over it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A rainy day fund in case you need to leave is a thing, but it's usually a secret in instances like abuse. I can't fathom rubbing it in someone's face.
That's what I thought. It almost sounds like she's letting him know she's aware things aren't right, and gaining confidence.
P
Maybe. My gaining confidence would probably look like sneaking stuff out of the house that there's a risk of someone noticing and reaching out to support networks to leave.
This just sounds like emotional manipulation and contempt. sounds like contempt to me too. I've known the guy years and he's a decent bloke does his best as a husband ect doesn't go out on the drink with the lads and takes all the overtime he can. He doesn't even come camping anymore as he gets too much grief over it. "
In that case I dunno. She may just be a cunt after all.
P |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"A rainy day fund in case you need to leave is a thing, but it's usually a secret in instances like abuse. I can't fathom rubbing it in someone's face.
That's what I thought. It almost sounds like she's letting him know she's aware things aren't right, and gaining confidence.
P
Maybe. My gaining confidence would probably look like sneaking stuff out of the house that there's a risk of someone noticing and reaching out to support networks to leave.
This just sounds like emotional manipulation and contempt. sounds like contempt to me too. I've known the guy years and he's a decent bloke does his best as a husband ect doesn't go out on the drink with the lads and takes all the overtime he can. He doesn't even come camping anymore as he gets too much grief over it.
In that case I dunno. She may just be a cunt after all.
P"
I think you might be right! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"A rainy day fund in case you need to leave is a thing, but it's usually a secret in instances like abuse. I can't fathom rubbing it in someone's face.
That's what I thought. It almost sounds like she's letting him know she's aware things aren't right, and gaining confidence.
P
Maybe. My gaining confidence would probably look like sneaking stuff out of the house that there's a risk of someone noticing and reaching out to support networks to leave.
This just sounds like emotional manipulation and contempt.
Possibly. When I was with my ex I got to the point I didn't care anymore. If we were with his mates I'd make sly comments in a hope they'd see him for what he really was. I was gonna get shit whether I kept my mouth shut or whether I spoke up, so I kinda thought fuck it, I'm past giving a shit, as peace keeping doesn't work.
I had no support network, not really. I was crying out for help but didn't know where to turn.
P"
I'm sorry you had to experience that everybody should have some form of support. |
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"Talk to her, assess if individual or couples counselling is a realistic option, start seriously considering separation. I've noticed when we've been out in a group that she talks down to him and mocks him a fair bit when she's d*unk I think that alone would be enough for me! I understand they've been together afar while tho.
You don't know her side.
He could make her feel like he's using her, hence her thinking fuck it, I'll make the most of the situation and actually get something for myself out of it.
There's clearly issues there and her talking down or mocking him when she's had a drink could be that she's getting a bit brave because of Dutch courage and saying things that she wouldn't normally (just would think or say under her breath rather than voice out loud)
I'd say there's bitterness and resentment there.
Or she's a cunt.
Who knows. Until you have all sides of the story, you'll never know.
P"
This pretty much sums up my thoughts.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A rainy day fund in case you need to leave is a thing, but it's usually a secret in instances like abuse. I can't fathom rubbing it in someone's face.
That's what I thought. It almost sounds like she's letting him know she's aware things aren't right, and gaining confidence.
P
Maybe. My gaining confidence would probably look like sneaking stuff out of the house that there's a risk of someone noticing and reaching out to support networks to leave.
This just sounds like emotional manipulation and contempt.
Possibly. When I was with my ex I got to the point I didn't care anymore. If we were with his mates I'd make sly comments in a hope they'd see him for what he really was. I was gonna get shit whether I kept my mouth shut or whether I spoke up, so I kinda thought fuck it, I'm past giving a shit, as peace keeping doesn't work.
I had no support network, not really. I was crying out for help but didn't know where to turn.
PI'm sorry you had to experience that everybody should have some form of support. "
It's been, it's gone and I'm over it. I'm happy to talk about my experiences if it helps someone else notice certain signs or highlights red flags.
P |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If this is as it sounds, they need to go their separate ways ASAP. If they want to play silly buggers, he should pay her cash then take it back from her bag when she's asleep. If she wants to complain to anyone about it, let her prove it and say why. She sounds a bitch, but as others have said - there's always the other side to the story. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If this is as it sounds, they need to go their separate ways ASAP. If they want to play silly buggers, he should pay her cash then take it back from her bag when she's asleep. If she wants to complain to anyone about it, let her prove it and say why. She sounds a bitch, but as others have said - there's always the other side to the story."
agreed I don't know her side and I doubt I ever will it's not as if I can ask her if she's charging him £100for a shag..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It never ceases to amaze me what people will put up with.
Not quite the same but I knew a guy who charged his wife for the vegetables he grew in the garden. "
I hope she charged him for the meals she cooked him out of said vegetables and with a labour charge on top 
P |
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"It never ceases to amaze me what people will put up with.
Not quite the same but I knew a guy who charged his wife for the vegetables he grew in the garden.
I hope she charged him for the meals she cooked him out of said vegetables and with a labour charge on top
P"
No idea. I think I would have just cooked them for myself and put unwashed, raw vegetables on his plate.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It never ceases to amaze me what people will put up with.
Not quite the same but I knew a guy who charged his wife for the vegetables he grew in the garden.
I hope she charged him for the meals she cooked him out of said vegetables and with a labour charge on top
P
No idea. I think I would have just cooked them for myself and put unwashed, raw vegetables on his plate. "
I'd have given him an empty plate |
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"It never ceases to amaze me what people will put up with.
Not quite the same but I knew a guy who charged his wife for the vegetables he grew in the garden.
I hope she charged him for the meals she cooked him out of said vegetables and with a labour charge on top
P
No idea. I think I would have just cooked them for myself and put unwashed, raw vegetables on his plate.
I'd have given him an empty plate "
He might have found he had a butternut squash where the sun don't shine if he tried to charge me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It never ceases to amaze me what people will put up with.
Not quite the same but I knew a guy who charged his wife for the vegetables he grew in the garden.
I hope she charged him for the meals she cooked him out of said vegetables and with a labour charge on top
P
No idea. I think I would have just cooked them for myself and put unwashed, raw vegetables on his plate.
I'd have given him an empty plate
He might have found he had a butternut squash where the sun don't shine if he tried to charge me "
Now that would be worth a tenner alone  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sounds like emotional abuse. Even if this isn't the full story there's obviously something wrong happening in that relationship, might be best to cut their losses. |
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"If this is as it sounds, they need to go their separate ways ASAP. If they want to play silly buggers, he should pay her cash then take it back from her bag when she's asleep. If she wants to complain to anyone about it, let her prove it and say why. She sounds a bitch, but as others have said - there's always the other side to the story.agreed I don't know her side and I doubt I ever will it's not as if I can ask her if she's charging him £100for a shag.. "
you could and ask if she does discount!!!! lol |
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If this is true (there is very probably a whole lot more to it I would guess) then he should simply attach a price, financially or sexually, to every activity he does around the house.
No doubt the tit for tat game would evolve and it would result in either a total breakdown or a situation for sensible compromise.
Total breakdown then get out and get on, compromise then maybe some reason for this issue, conversation and remedy.
In truth if it were me in this situation then I would simply tell her to fuck off! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If this is as it sounds, they need to go their separate ways ASAP. If they want to play silly buggers, he should pay her cash then take it back from her bag when she's asleep. If she wants to complain to anyone about it, let her prove it and say why. She sounds a bitch, but as others have said - there's always the other side to the story.agreed I don't know her side and I doubt I ever will it's not as if I can ask her if she's charging him £100for a shag..
you could and ask if she does discount!!!! lol "
mates rates? She's definitely not my type I'd sooner wank into a tramps sock |
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