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When the magics gone
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Okay so not a swinging question. A Christmas question instead. My 5 yr old last night told me their was no such thing as Santa. I was more than a little stunned. I managed to quickly change the subject but I know this won't be the last time she will ask. She is autistic and has adhd. I don't want to lie to her but also don't want to take away the magic of Christmas. She had older siblings that still believe and don't want to ruin it for them. Anyone any ideas on how best to answer her question with out actually saying there is no Santa. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Okay so not a swinging question. A Christmas question instead. My 5 yr old last night told me their was no such thing as Santa. I was more than a little stunned. I managed to quickly change the subject but I know this won't be the last time she will ask. She is autistic and has adhd. I don't want to lie to her but also don't want to take away the magic of Christmas. She had older siblings that still believe and don't want to ruin it for them. Anyone any ideas on how best to answer her question with out actually saying there is no Santa."
tell her santa is a good feeling it's a grand story involving party's and fun and presents, some things you never see you're just reminded of them in the good things you do in celebration
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
My children are in their teens and I have neither confirmed or denied whether he is real or not. Of course they all asked, I just said that it's more fun to believe and left it at that. They were a bit older than 5 though so I'm not sure that would work with your daughter, but you could try  |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Okay so not a swinging question. A Christmas question instead. My 5 yr old last night told me their was no such thing as Santa. I was more than a little stunned. I managed to quickly change the subject but I know this won't be the last time she will ask. She is autistic and has adhd. I don't want to lie to her but also don't want to take away the magic of Christmas. She had older siblings that still believe and don't want to ruin it for them. Anyone any ideas on how best to answer her question with out actually saying there is no Santa."
Did you ask her why she thinks there's no such thing as santa?
I understand you not wanting to lie, perhaps it's a selfish thing that we as parents do in wanting to keep the magic alive for our kids a little longer.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Tell her Santa is a feeling that some people think of a a person. The embodiment of Christmas Spirit, faith, not science.
In the same way you can see "love" or "kindness"- it's a feeling rather than a factual thing.
I have a 5 year old too although she isn't autistic she does question things x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Okay so not a swinging question. A Christmas question instead. My 5 yr old last night told me their was no such thing as Santa. I was more than a little stunned. I managed to quickly change the subject but I know this won't be the last time she will ask. She is autistic and has adhd. I don't want to lie to her but also don't want to take away the magic of Christmas. She had older siblings that still believe and don't want to ruin it for them. Anyone any ideas on how best to answer her question with out actually saying there is no Santa.tell her santa is a good feeling it's a grand story involving party's and fun and presents, some things you never see you're just reminded of them in the good things you do in celebration"
Great answer to a tough question.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Send her a letter from him? Or do a Portable North Pole video from him with her name? I'm having a similar issue and my wee one is past these things working now but might still work at 5. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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mine have always been told he brings one gift
Children are quite logical maybe more so with asd
When any of mine say I just say it's up to you what you believe (I do lie and say I believe)
Similar to religion I tell them their beliefs are up to them but I don't believe
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Okay so not a swinging question. A Christmas question instead. My 5 yr old last night told me their was no such thing as Santa. I was more than a little stunned. I managed to quickly change the subject but I know this won't be the last time she will ask. She is autistic and has adhd. I don't want to lie to her but also don't want to take away the magic of Christmas. She had older siblings that still believe and don't want to ruin it for them. Anyone any ideas on how best to answer her question with out actually saying there is no Santa.
Did you ask her why she thinks there's no such thing as santa?
I understand you not wanting to lie, perhaps it's a selfish thing that we as parents do in wanting to keep the magic alive for our kids a little longer.
"
She simply belives that he doesn't exist as it's silly to think magic is real. It's the same thing with God. They are learning about God in school and her attitude is if she can't see him he simply doesn't exist. She doesn't believe that our soles go anywhere after you die. It's just always been the way things are with her. This just stumped me  |
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When my eight year old questioned it last year, I said well the evidence would seem to indicate he does exist....
And she kind of accepted that.
Thus year she hasn't written to Santa as yet...so I think she's kidding me she thinks he still exists, or hedging her bets!
I was amazed she believed for so long. My sister told me there was no Santa when I was 4... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I told mine that when we stop believing in good things then the good things don't happen anymore... 26 and 17 and still never mention it and have their stockings  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Okay so not a swinging question. A Christmas question instead. My 5 yr old last night told me their was no such thing as Santa. I was more than a little stunned. I managed to quickly change the subject but I know this won't be the last time she will ask. She is autistic and has adhd. I don't want to lie to her but also don't want to take away the magic of Christmas. She had older siblings that still believe and don't want to ruin it for them. Anyone any ideas on how best to answer her question with out actually saying there is no Santa.
Did you ask her why she thinks there's no such thing as santa?
I understand you not wanting to lie, perhaps it's a selfish thing that we as parents do in wanting to keep the magic alive for our kids a little longer.
She simply belives that he doesn't exist as it's silly to think magic is real. It's the same thing with God. They are learning about God in school and her attitude is if she can't see him he simply doesn't exist. She doesn't believe that our soles go anywhere after you die. It's just always been the way things are with her. This just stumped me "
Thats a lot of deep thinking for a 5 yo bless her. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Okay so not a swinging question. A Christmas question instead. My 5 yr old last night told me their was no such thing as Santa. I was more than a little stunned. I managed to quickly change the subject but I know this won't be the last time she will ask. She is autistic and has adhd. I don't want to lie to her but also don't want to take away the magic of Christmas. She had older siblings that still believe and don't want to ruin it for them. Anyone any ideas on how best to answer her question with out actually saying there is no Santa.
Did you ask her why she thinks there's no such thing as santa?
I understand you not wanting to lie, perhaps it's a selfish thing that we as parents do in wanting to keep the magic alive for our kids a little longer.
She simply belives that he doesn't exist as it's silly to think magic is real. It's the same thing with God. They are learning about God in school and her attitude is if she can't see him he simply doesn't exist. She doesn't believe that our soles go anywhere after you die. It's just always been the way things are with her. This just stumped me
Thats a lot of deep thinking for a 5 yo bless her. "
Yah she's always been a deep thinker. She lost her grandfather last year and found the thought if him going to heaven was rather unbelievable. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Our daughter is 8 and still believes, she’s so excited and that’s what makes Christmas worth while for us, i know it’s gunna come soon but once that belief has gone, Christmas will be a bit shit. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Our daughter is 8 and still believes, she’s so excited and that’s what makes Christmas worth while for us, i know it’s gunna come soon but once that belief has gone, Christmas will be a bit shit."
My older kids still believe. Thankfully. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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As suspected she asked again. I didn't ignore the question but told her a out the magic of question. How Christmas is a magical time because it's a time for giving, spending time with family, random acts of kindness. We talked about how magical the lights are and she seemed to accept that. So thanks for all the advice. |
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My daughter (7) at a Christmas party told me that she knew the Santa wasn't Santa. I just told her ok, well just keep that to yourself, we don't talk about that. She said ok. It was nicely suppressed under carpet. Hopefully she understood there are bigger forces at play. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's sad when they start to realise we've lied to them for years. That's what my daughter said to me. Think what she said was I've told her not to lie as liars are always found out in the end. She always knew the ones that popped up were fakes. Can fool them some of the time but not all the time. |
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