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The power of positive langauge and actions
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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These are just my thoughts (MT) and ramblings. They are not aimed at anyone but based on what I have seen and read on fab.
The forums seem to be full of negative ideas opinions and response to lots of different subjects. From people passing judgment on pictures as they don't fall into their idea if beauty. To responses to messages because someone has said thanks but no thanks.
Wether you want to see it or not Fab and swinging is a community. To me a community is when a group of people come together that share or have certain attitudes and interests in common with one another.
In my way of thinking surely a community is only as strong as the bond we all share. Now I don't mean be Bossom buddies with everyone on here but at least have a mutual respect to those we come into contact with.
This I think starts with the language we use when commenting on posts in the forum or in send and responding in messages.
I know I have let myself get worked up in the forums and been put in the sin bin for time out.
In my job I deal with the damage negativity has on individuals and their lives and always talk about the use of positive language in all we do.
The English language is laden with opportunities to formulate negative speech in place of a more positive dialogue.
Although initially a phrase slanted in both a negative and positive light would appear to have the same influence, we would actually comprehend the positive statement 30–40% times faster than we would the negative one.
Also a positive slant on a message will also make not only the receiver but the sender feel better in themselves.
So here is to me trying to stay out of the sin bin be more positive with people on here and try and build people up instead of knocking them down
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I see all this potential, and I see it squandered. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables - slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our great war is a spiritual war... Our great depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars, but we won't. We're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off. |
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"Agree.
Look at some profiles and every statement is a negative, then people wonder why they struggle to get meets.
"
Some of us don't care if we get a meet or not. It's not the end the the world. I prefer looking through the forums rather than sift through hundreds of profiles. It's more about the banter for me. |
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"In my job I deal with the damage negativity has on individuals and their lives and always talk about the use of positive language in all we do."
Reads like a direct paste from those wonderful PC courses so beloved of people these days.
We'll pass on being "behaviourally modified thank you. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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""In my job I deal with the damage negativity has on individuals and their lives and always talk about the use of positive language in all we do."
Reads like a direct paste from those wonderful PC courses so beloved of people these days.
We'll pass on being "behaviourally modified thank you. "
Why is being positive and polite to people pc.
It has nothing to do with that it's simply being nice to people |
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""In my job I deal with the damage negativity has on individuals and their lives and always talk about the use of positive language in all we do."
Reads like a direct paste from those wonderful PC courses so beloved of people these days.
We'll pass on being "behaviourally modified thank you.
Why is being positive and polite to people pc.
It has nothing to do with that it's simply being nice to people "
You need a reality check. Yes in an ideal world we would all be polite and politically correct. In saying that do you respond to every message you receive or just delete and block the rude requests. Some members get hundreds of messages per day. So basically should reply to every message? I.e. sorry not my type or thanks but no thanks.
I think you get my point  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
""In my job I deal with the damage negativity has on individuals and their lives and always talk about the use of positive language in all we do."
Reads like a direct paste from those wonderful PC courses so beloved of people these days.
We'll pass on being "behaviourally modified thank you.
Why is being positive and polite to people pc.
It has nothing to do with that it's simply being nice to people
You need a reality check. Yes in an ideal world we would all be polite and politically correct. In saying that do you respond to every message you receive or just delete and block the rude requests. Some members get hundreds of messages per day. So basically should reply to every message? I.e. sorry not my type or thanks but no thanks.
I think you get my point "
As I said I was going to try and respond positive did not ask anyone else to do it. In the long run it would be a better world if we did. But I also know the trolls out there get their kicks from negativity |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"These are just my thoughts (MT) and ramblings. They are not aimed at anyone but based on what I have seen and read on fab.
The forums seem to be full of negative ideas opinions and response to lots of different subjects. From people passing judgment on pictures as they don't fall into their idea if beauty. To responses to messages because someone has said thanks but no thanks.
Wether you want to see it or not Fab and swinging is a community. To me a community is when a group of people come together that share or have certain attitudes and interests in common with one another.
In my way of thinking surely a community is only as strong as the bond we all share. Now I don't mean be Bossom buddies with everyone on here but at least have a mutual respect to those we come into contact with.
This I think starts with the language we use when commenting on posts in the forum or in send and responding in messages.
I know I have let myself get worked up in the forums and been put in the sin bin for time out.
In my job I deal with the damage negativity has on individuals and their lives and always talk about the use of positive language in all we do.
The English language is laden with opportunities to formulate negative speech in place of a more positive dialogue.
Although initially a phrase slanted in both a negative and positive light would appear to have the same influence, we would actually comprehend the positive statement 30–40% times faster than we would the negative one.
Also a positive slant on a message will also make not only the receiver but the sender feel better in themselves.
So here is to me trying to stay out of the sin bin be more positive with people on here and try and build people up instead of knocking them down
"
of course in theory you are totally correct unfortunately a lot of single guys here get a very negative response partly their own doing but mainly because numbers are against them that in turn breeds a frustration that evolves in messages not just from the men but from the women and couples that just don't have the time to answer them and then theirs the club's which are kept alive by the men but which favour the couples and women so here is the root of the problem. I like to keep a humorous edge to it but you can never please all of the people all of the time, we all have different opinions and ideas on how it should work but the only way it works is down to how you as an individual perceive it and deal with it. The forums highlight the differences in thought for a small percentage of the sites membership. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's ok to disagree with someone but it can be done civilly with becoming abusive. Be abusive is designed to cause harm to another person. But really it just speaks volumes about the person giving the abuse. |
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"It's ok to disagree with someone but it can be done civilly with becoming abusive. Be abusive is designed to cause harm to another person. But really it just speaks volumes about the person giving the abuse."
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