FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > How proactive are you?
How proactive are you?
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
Quite often I see people posting about how they can't get the meets that they want or that they're frustrated about lack of quality messages, or even about the poor quality of threads on the forums.
My question is; do you act proactively to change these things? Do you search out the people that you want and send the first message?
Do you actively engage with people the way that you would like to be engaged with?
Do you post the kind of threads that interest you?
Over to you dear fabbers... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Meet wise, yes I do search and message them first, but that’s with couples not using the forums. As for forumites, occasionally I’ll be brave and message first but not often.
As for threads, no I’m not always proactive. X |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
I'm not that proactive atm, because I'm getting bored of it all.
Occasionally I'll have a look at my who's near. Sometimes I'll use the search feature but with it throwing up 300 + results with quite tight preferences I ain't got time for that so don't bother.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Quite often I see people posting about how they can't get the meets that they want or that they're frustrated about lack of quality messages, or even about the poor quality of threads on the forums.
My question is; do you act proactively to change these things? Do you search out the people that you want and send the first message?
Do you actively engage with people the way that you would like to be engaged with?
Do you post the kind of threads that interest you?
Over to you dear fabbers... "
I never send first messages and I do ok, I generally stick to light hearted threads because the more serious ones end up very negative sometimes, especially if it's a woman that started it, the guys want to protect her and quite often ignore the obvious holes in the story, I wonder why. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I mix things up i rarelly message first unless off a thread if im horny il just bombard the local area with status updates until someone gives me sympathy sex to shut me up  |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Quite often I see people posting about how they can't get the meets that they want or that they're frustrated about lack of quality messages, or even about the poor quality of threads on the forums.
My question is; do you act proactively to change these things? Do you search out the people that you want and send the first message?
Do you actively engage with people the way that you would like to be engaged with?
Do you post the kind of threads that interest you?
Over to you dear fabbers... I never send first messages and I do ok, I generally stick to light hearted threads because the more serious ones end up very negative sometimes, especially if it's a woman that started it, the guys want to protect her and quite often ignore the obvious holes in the story, I wonder why. "
Rather a pointed comment there! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes I’ll search and message and yes I’ll message off the back of a thread. The trick to learn is finding the woman who I fancy and that I think the recipient will respond.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Quite often I see people posting about how they can't get the meets that they want or that they're frustrated about lack of quality messages, or even about the poor quality of threads on the forums.
My question is; do you act proactively to change these things? Do you search out the people that you want and send the first message?
Do you actively engage with people the way that you would like to be engaged with?
Do you post the kind of threads that interest you?
Over to you dear fabbers... "
I try to do different threads,but alas mine just get maybe 10 posting,and the "usual" everyday threads keep going,maybe I'm not popular or in the clique but fuck me just how many kiss blah blah threads do you want |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Quite often I see people posting about how they can't get the meets that they want or that they're frustrated about lack of quality messages, or even about the poor quality of threads on the forums.
My question is; do you act proactively to change these things? Do you search out the people that you want and send the first message?
Do you actively engage with people the way that you would like to be engaged with?
Do you post the kind of threads that interest you?
Over to you dear fabbers...
I try to do different threads,but alas mine just get maybe 10 posting,and the "usual" everyday threads keep going,maybe I'm not popular or in the clique but fuck me just how many kiss blah blah threads do you want"
I find that it has little to do with popularity or with any form of clique, it's just about being known. The more you post, the more you're noticed etc.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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not very proactive. If someone who is on my hot list shows interest ie through fabbing my pics then I'll message first. But generally I don't bother.
Face pic Friday is about as proactive as I get as I've hooked up with a couple of hotties that way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" not very proactive. If someone who is on my hot list shows interest ie through fabbing my pics then I'll message first. But generally I don't bother.
Face pic Friday is about as proactive as I get as I've hooked up with a couple of hotties that way. "
fpf yes good call
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I did originally start by doing searching (sitting reading/flirting on the forum still counts as searching) and messaging
Recently I've let myself get found, and that works pretty well also.
If the forum is boring I'll (unbelievably) lòg off and do something else until someone comes along to make it more interesting.
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I did originally start by doing searching (sitting reading/flirting on the forum still counts as searching) and messaging
Recently I've let myself get found, and that works pretty well also.
If the forum is boring I'll (unbelievably) lòg off and do something else until someone comes along to make it more interesting.
"
Log. Off...
I understand the two words separately but not together in this context |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I did originally start by doing searching (sitting reading/flirting on the forum still counts as searching) and messaging
Recently I've let myself get found, and that works pretty well also.
If the forum is boring I'll (unbelievably) lòg off and do something else until someone comes along to make it more interesting.
Log. Off...
I understand the two words separately but not together in this context"
Pushing the page to the side is almost like a log off isnt it.  |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I did originally start by doing searching (sitting reading/flirting on the forum still counts as searching) and messaging
Recently I've let myself get found, and that works pretty well also.
If the forum is boring I'll (unbelievably) lòg off and do something else until someone comes along to make it more interesting.
Log. Off...
I understand the two words separately but not together in this context
Pushing the page to the side is almost like a log off isnt it. "
Exactly the same as turning off your phone, so you don't walk into traffic when reading, yes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nah
You just change your profile pic. Xx 
I like to appeal to them visually. I can't be arsed messaging. "
Bet that works better for you than it does for me.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I just sit at the entrance to the man cave and wait to see if anyone drops by with a note hand written in copperplate with an invitation to lunch.....
How's that going for you? "
Last one I got was Charles Dickens. |
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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I just sit at the entrance to the man cave and wait to see if anyone drops by with a note hand written in copperplate with an invitation to lunch.....
How's that going for you?
Last one I got was Charles Dickens. "
Good catch though! The man wrote a good missive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've never really tried using threads but otherwise Im quite proactive by looking into who I think ill like and leaving an inviting message.
Many times I don't get a response due to the sheer amount of messages women get. It is what it is |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
In terms of messaging people cold, I've never been particularly pro-active - think I've sent maybe 5 or 6 unsolicited messages in my two years here, and most of those were when I first set up the profile.
In terms of being active on the forums though (which I guess is a form of pro-activeness in order to get yourself noticed) it's a different story, and has led to pretty much all of my meets in one way or another - that said even then unless it's blatantly obvious someone would want to meet me, I'm a little backwards in coming forwards and suggesting it. |
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I do ok as it is but most of the time the issue for me is logistics! Almost everyone I’ve met or fancy are in a different town  as much as I love arranging a meet, chatting and travelling sometimes I like to act spontaneous, living in Wiltshire sure puts paid to that!!  |
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"I do ok as it is but most of the time the issue for me is logistics! Almost everyone I’ve met or fancy are in a different town as much as I love arranging a meet, chatting and travelling sometimes I like to act spontaneous, living in Wiltshire sure puts paid to that!! "
Try being on the other side of London - it's a bitch to cross!! |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
As with everything it depends. Sometimes we will actively look for meets, email people, post photos to attract attention then other times we will go quiet and if we get offers great if not who cares. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Quite often I see people posting about how they can't get the meets that they want or that they're frustrated about lack of quality messages, or even about the poor quality of threads on the forums.
My question is; do you act proactively to change these things? Do you search out the people that you want and send the first message?
Do you actively engage with people the way that you would like to be engaged with?
Do you post the kind of threads that interest you?
Over to you dear fabbers... "
I find I get more interest by doing less. Men are always seen as pushy. So by doing less, I appear more normal? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do ok as it is but most of the time the issue for me is logistics! Almost everyone I’ve met or fancy are in a different town as much as I love arranging a meet, chatting and travelling sometimes I like to act spontaneous, living in Wiltshire sure puts paid to that!! "
Yes I find that myself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I put in what I want to get out of it.
Like other things, it's a two way street and I'm not a girl who just lays there Good to hear no one likes a pillow princess  "
I've not heard that phrase in forever |
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By *osweet69Couple
over a year ago
portsmouth |
"I put in what I want to get out of it.
Like other things, it's a two way street and I'm not a girl who just lays there Good to hear no one likes a pillow princess
I've not heard that phrase in forever "
Dam showing my age again |
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