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For those who can't be bothered with Xmas

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

For whatever reasons, you may have painful memories around Xmas, or have been recently bereaved, or simply just fucking hate it ... This is the thread for you.

**Sits back and waits for it to fill up with everyone saying how much they love Xmas

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I dread Christmas....

It's been tainted with utter sadness since my nephew took his life on Christmas day 2014

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

I'm not the biggest fan

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By *elshsunsWoman  over a year ago

Flintshire

It’s not for me either .... lots of issues around it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I hate Christmas for lots of reasons ...roll on jan

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I dread Christmas....

It's been tainted with utter sadness since my nephew took his life on Christmas day 2014 "

Oh bless you... There are so many heartbreaking reasons that people don't like it, but people just assume you're being miserable.

As you have proven, it is usually much, much deeper than that.

Sending you lots of hugs xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm not the biggest fan "

Your profile pic suggests differently

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"It’s not for me either .... lots of issues around it "

Yes, me too and none of them small ones sadly

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I dread Christmas....

It's been tainted with utter sadness since my nephew took his life on Christmas day 2014 "

sending hugs x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I hate Christmas for lots of reasons ...roll on jan "

Welcome to the exclusive club then ... I agree, roll on 2019 x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I dread Christmas....

It's been tainted with utter sadness since my nephew took his life on Christmas day 2014

Oh bless you... There are so many heartbreaking reasons that people don't like it, but people just assume you're being miserable.

As you have proven, it is usually much, much deeper than that.

Sending you lots of hugs xx"

thank you. X

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By *alking DisasterWoman  over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

I hate Christmas.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I hate Christmas."

Welcome ... Pull up a chair and join this small, exclusive club x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"For whatever reasons, you may have painful memories around Xmas, or have been recently bereaved, or simply just fucking hate it ... This is the thread for you.

**Sits back and waits for it to fill up with everyone saying how much they love Xmas "

I like the party atmosphere, the religious festival means nothing, I don't get embroiled in the shop until you drop phenomena but I enjoy getting together with family and friends, trying not to eat and drink too much.

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By *abs..Woman  over a year ago

..

Lots of us have painful memories around Christmas, myself included but I always did enjoy Christmas and I will continue to do so. I shall take the time to remember those I have lost and try to build positive happy memories for my family.

What I would never do though is try to make others feel bad if they were enjoying it and I wasn’t, because that would be incredibly selfish. There’s a bit too much of that going on in the world.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It must be horrible when trying to avoid it but it's everywhere. Not long till it's all over again.

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By *uxomBloomsWoman  over a year ago

Near Tunbridge Wells

I just hate the obscene level of consumerism and greed, it also has a nasty effect on the environment with all the pointless plastic tat which is produced.

I like the time off though.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I simply can't be arsed with it's false happiness, and incessant push to drive people into huge debt by proclaiming 'Christmas is about TV's' or 'Christmas is about phones' or buy my £200 bottle of smell nice because Charline Theron writhes around a screen/poster.

To see such indulgence alongside the queues for the food banks, and the countless homeless sleeping rough makes me sad.

Roll on December the 26th and the signal that it's all over until October '19

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/12/18 08:11:11]

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

What I would never do though is try to make others feel bad if they were enjoying it and I wasn’t, because that would be incredibly selfish. There’s a bit too much of that going on in the world. "

Which is why I started a thread for those who don't like it as there are loads currently going on for those who do.

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By *alking DisasterWoman  over a year ago

South Oxfordshire


"Lots of us have painful memories around Christmas, myself included but I always did enjoy Christmas and I will continue to do so. I shall take the time to remember those I have lost and try to build positive happy memories for my family.

What I would never do though is try to make others feel bad if they were enjoying it and I wasn’t, because that would be incredibly selfish. There’s a bit too much of that going on in the world. "

Yet it's ok for those who enjoy Christmas to force their enjoyment on me?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I simply can't be arsed with it's false happiness, and incessant push to drive people into huge debt by proclaiming 'Christmas is about TV's' or 'Christmas is about phones' or buy my £200 bottle of smell nice because Charline Theron writhes around a screen/poster.

To see such indulgence alongside the queues for the food banks, and the countless homeless sleeping rough makes me sad.

Roll on December the 26th and the signal that it's all over until October '19"

I completely agree

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By *abs..Woman  over a year ago

..


"

What I would never do though is try to make others feel bad if they were enjoying it and I wasn’t, because that would be incredibly selfish. There’s a bit too much of that going on in the world.

Which is why I started a thread for those who don't like it as there are loads currently going on for those who do."

If that was the case then I would accept it but you and I both know why you’re doing this and I think it’s unkind but I shall say no more.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Lots of us have painful memories around Christmas, myself included but I always did enjoy Christmas and I will continue to do so. I shall take the time to remember those I have lost and try to build positive happy memories for my family.

What I would never do though is try to make others feel bad if they were enjoying it and I wasn’t, because that would be incredibly selfish. There’s a bit too much of that going on in the world.

Yet it's ok for those who enjoy Christmas to force their enjoyment on me?"

Seems so...

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By *iss_tressWoman  over a year ago

London

Christmas was my favourite time of year. I remember walking down the road and seeing my house covered in lights and I'd hurry my pace: my baby was home from uni and had put the lights up.

My eldest would come up to stay...I simply loved it. When they got boyfriends and my sister and her family moved nearby Christmas was a delightful time.

Now my children have families of their own, my sister is in Leeds and I have a partner who loathes Christmas.

For the first time I'm looking forward to the new year and not Christmas: it's no longer the same.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

What I would never do though is try to make others feel bad if they were enjoying it and I wasn’t, because that would be incredibly selfish. There’s a bit too much of that going on in the world.

Which is why I started a thread for those who don't like it as there are loads currently going on for those who do.

If that was the case then I would accept it but you and I both know why you’re doing this and I think it’s unkind but I shall say no more. "

Actually, you THINK you know...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I simply can't be arsed with it's false happiness, and incessant push to drive people into huge debt by proclaiming 'Christmas is about TV's' or 'Christmas is about phones' or buy my £200 bottle of smell nice because Charline Theron writhes around a screen/poster.

To see such indulgence alongside the queues for the food banks, and the countless homeless sleeping rough makes me sad.

Roll on December the 26th and the signal that it's all over until October '19"

I hate all the indulgent shit. Going into debt because it's expected by society. Fuck that.

The bullshit of it being a happy giving time yet so many just use it as a time to show off.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I fucking hate Christmas, time off work spending money and not earning any! Grrrr don't even get me started! ??merry Christmas. X

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I fucking hate Christmas, time off work spending money and not earning any! Grrrr don't even get me started! ??merry Christmas. X "

Do you have to take the time off? x

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

It's a free holiday from my work. Nothing more.

I enjoy the break. But I despair at the gluttony of consumerism, the domestic stress and strife and the sheer hypocrisy of those trying to give it a religious veneer.

Apart from that, I'm all for it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm just loving the parties!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

All round to mine for a fish supper and not a Slade song within earshot?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"All round to mine for a fish supper and not a Slade song within earshot? "

Can I have steak and jacket spud instead please, I don't really like fish

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"All round to mine for a fish supper and not a Slade song within earshot?

Can I have steak and jacket spud instead please, I don't really like fish "

Jacket spud is a bit too close a relative to the roast spud on the christmas lunch. I'm not sure I can allow that

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I simply can't be arsed with it's false happiness, and incessant push to drive people into huge debt by proclaiming 'Christmas is about TV's' or 'Christmas is about phones' or buy my £200 bottle of smell nice because Charline Theron writhes around a screen/poster.

To see such indulgence alongside the queues for the food banks, and the countless homeless sleeping rough makes me sad.

Roll on December the 26th and the signal that it's all over until October '19"

I couldn't agree more.

The pressure that's put on people to be "happy" is awful especially if you struggle this time of the year.

Anyway, it's a Christian festival and I haven't stepped foot in a church since I was in brownies!! I don't celebrate any other religious festival because I'm not part of that religion.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"All round to mine for a fish supper and not a Slade song within earshot?

Can I have steak and jacket spud instead please, I don't really like fish

Jacket spud is a bit too close a relative to the roast spud on the christmas lunch. I'm not sure I can allow that "

Okay. Just steak and fresh crusty bread then please

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As an Atheist, I would feel a total hypocrite celebrating it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"All round to mine for a fish supper and not a Slade song within earshot?

Can I have steak and jacket spud instead please, I don't really like fish

Jacket spud is a bit too close a relative to the roast spud on the christmas lunch. I'm not sure I can allow that

Okay. Just steak and fresh crusty bread then please "

Done

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By *eelouWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow

I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As an Atheist, I would feel a total hypocrite celebrating it"

I'm pretty sure that Christmas has sod all to do with religion.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman  over a year ago

evesham


"For whatever reasons, you may have painful memories around Xmas, or have been recently bereaved, or simply just fucking hate it ... This is the thread for you.

**Sits back and waits for it to fill up with everyone saying how much they love Xmas "

***does that mean you won't infiltrate positive Christmas threads with how much you don't like it? Regardless of how good your reason is for disliking it. Same thing really.

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By *abs..Woman  over a year ago

..


"For whatever reasons, you may have painful memories around Xmas, or have been recently bereaved, or simply just fucking hate it ... This is the thread for you.

**Sits back and waits for it to fill up with everyone saying how much they love Xmas

***does that mean you won't infiltrate positive Christmas threads with how much you don't like it? Regardless of how good your reason is for disliking it. Same thing really. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"All round to mine for a fish supper and not a Slade song within earshot?

Can I have steak and jacket spud instead please, I don't really like fish

Jacket spud is a bit too close a relative to the roast spud on the christmas lunch. I'm not sure I can allow that

Okay. Just steak and fresh crusty bread then please

Done

"

Win!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else. "

Yea and it's always expected isn't it?

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By *eelouWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

Yea and it's always expected isn't it? "

Oh yeah, even more so now. I just sit and shout bah humbug in my head lol. I love to live Christmas the way I used to but I just can't.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My best friend lost her Mum in May, she was only 51 and my friend is an only child. It sounds strange but since it happened my friend physically looks different. My heart breaks to see the pain across her face, it’s in her eyes, I know it sounds weird but she’s my closest friend love her to pieces.

This Xmas is gonna be hard for her but she wants to make new Xmas traditions instead of what she used to do with her mum so we’re all going out for a meal Xmas eve. We’re gonna take the Xmas eve boxes and the waitress said she’ll bring them out for our daughters, gonna dress up sparkly and shit!

My Xmas is tainted cos of ongoing court dealing with my ex and his wretched family, in court on the 17th but still trying to keep everything jolly for my child.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

Yea and it's always expected isn't it?

Oh yeah, even more so now. I just sit and shout bah humbug in my head lol. I love to live Christmas the way I used to but I just can't. "

I smile my way through it for the benefit of others ... So I have nothing to feel guilty about.

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

Yea and it's always expected isn't it? "

No, it really isn't.

I think that most decent adults can accept and respect that some may like it and some may not - if you're humbugging, humbug away. If you're ho-ho-hoing do so! Don't try and mould people to your way of viewing it.

It's clearly a less than pleasant time for some - forced joviality are shite especially when the time of year carries so much emotional weight for many.

I hope that however you (a plural you!) choose to see in the season, you're kind to yourself and to others. That's the most important thing.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"My best friend lost her Mum in May, she was only 51 and my friend is an only child. It sounds strange but since it happened my friend physically looks different. My heart breaks to see the pain across her face, it’s in her eyes, I know it sounds weird but she’s my closest friend love her to pieces.

This Xmas is gonna be hard for her but she wants to make new Xmas traditions instead of what she used to do with her mum so we’re all going out for a meal Xmas eve. We’re gonna take the Xmas eve boxes and the waitress said she’ll bring them out for our daughters, gonna dress up sparkly and shit!

My Xmas is tainted cos of ongoing court dealing with my ex and his wretched family, in court on the 17th but still trying to keep everything jolly for my child. "

That's the sign of a good friend...

Sorry you're having such shit with your ex et al, I have similar pressures and people keep assuring me that things WILL be better on the other side (and they have been through similar so I do listen to them...)

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By *abs..Woman  over a year ago

..


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

Yea and it's always expected isn't it?

No, it really isn't.

I think that most decent adults can accept and respect that some may like it and some may not - if you're humbugging, humbug away. If you're ho-ho-hoing do so! Don't try and mould people to your way of viewing it.

It's clearly a less than pleasant time for some - forced joviality are shite especially when the time of year carries so much emotional weight for many.

I hope that however you (a plural you!) choose to see in the season, you're kind to yourself and to others. That's the most important thing. "

Beautifully put Meli

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By *ycra loutMan  over a year ago

york/Scarborough

I won't go into detail as it will take me all day to write it but..... I HATE XMAS

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Christmas sucks balls

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I won't go into detail as it will take me all day to write it but..... I HATE XMAS "

People who know me well (and who care) know the true reasons I'm not a fan and it's far from being miserable about it, so I can understand not going into detail, but I will say "welcome to the club"

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Christmas sucks balls"

Now actually, that might make me quite like it

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By *uiet LightMan  over a year ago

Hove


"I dread Christmas....

It's been tainted with utter sadness since my nephew took his life on Christmas day 2014

Oh bless you... There are so many heartbreaking reasons that people don't like it, but people just assume you're being miserable.

As you have proven, it is usually much, much deeper than that.

Sending you lots of hugs xx"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not a fan!

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By *uiet LightMan  over a year ago

Hove


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

Yea and it's always expected isn't it?

No, it really isn't.

I think that most decent adults can accept and respect that some may like it and some may not - if you're humbugging, humbug away. If you're ho-ho-hoing do so! Don't try and mould people to your way of viewing it.

It's clearly a less than pleasant time for some - forced joviality are shite especially when the time of year carries so much emotional weight for many.

I hope that however you (a plural you!) choose to see in the season, you're kind to yourself and to others. That's the most important thing. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The fratellis - Lonesome Anti Christmas blues

https://youtu.be/TJGEai6C5fc

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Not a fan!"

Welcome

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By *ycra loutMan  over a year ago

york/Scarborough


"I won't go into detail as it will take me all day to write it but..... I HATE XMAS

People who know me well (and who care) know the true reasons I'm not a fan and it's far from being miserable about it, so I can understand not going into detail, but I will say "welcome to the club" "

25/12..let's get the couldn't care less about Xmas club active.. lots of things have happened personally at this time of year for me..but I do enjoy seeing families and kids enjoying the Xmas moment

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Christmas sucks balls"

Ooooo, ears perked up at sucking balls

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By *sGivesWoodWoman  over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"I simply can't be arsed with it's false happiness, and incessant push to drive people into huge debt by proclaiming 'Christmas is about TV's' or 'Christmas is about phones' or buy my £200 bottle of smell nice because Charline Theron writhes around a screen/poster.

To see such indulgence alongside the queues for the food banks, and the countless homeless sleeping rough makes me sad.

Roll on December the 26th and the signal that it's all over until October '19"

Exactly this

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I won't go into detail as it will take me all day to write it but..... I HATE XMAS

People who know me well (and who care) know the true reasons I'm not a fan and it's far from being miserable about it, so I can understand not going into detail, but I will say "welcome to the club"

25/12..let's get the couldn't care less about Xmas club active.. lots of things have happened personally at this time of year for me..but I do enjoy seeing families and kids enjoying the Xmas moment "

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By *ce WingerMan  over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Checks in and says I can't be arsed with it

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Checks in and says I can't be arsed with it "

Welcome

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By *rNaughtyNickMan  over a year ago

Birmingham

Bah humbug x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I dread Christmas....

It's been tainted with utter sadness since my nephew took his life on Christmas day 2014 "

Not that we hate Xmas but our house is up for sale we are thoroughly decluttering even sold the tree so this year no decorations

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Bah humbug x"

I'm not even bah humbug, I just have seriously huge and painful "memories" at Xmas

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By *alking DisasterWoman  over a year ago

South Oxfordshire


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

Yea and it's always expected isn't it?

No, it really isn't.

I think that most decent adults can accept and respect that some may like it and some may not - if you're humbugging, humbug away. If you're ho-ho-hoing do so! Don't try and mould people to your way of viewing it.

It's clearly a less than pleasant time for some - forced joviality are shite especially when the time of year carries so much emotional weight for many.

I hope that however you (a plural you!) choose to see in the season, you're kind to yourself and to others. That's the most important thing. "

I'm playing devil's advocate here, so please be assured that this is not personal Meli.

You say I need to be kind to myself and others, but how are others being kind to me?

I have genuine reasons for not liking Christmas (It's not just the commercialisation of it).

However, I'm told off for being miserable, to cheer up etc. How is that being kind to me when all I want is to be left alone.

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By *ce WingerMan  over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ


"Checks in and says I can't be arsed with it

Welcome "

Having been on my own for about the last 6 years, I tend to just listen to music and don't even turn the telly on

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By *eelouWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 01/12/18 09:45:32]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Recently bereaved here absolutely dreading it we decorated purely for our sons sake but we really can't afford it tbh

Mrscxxx

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By *eelouWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

Yea and it's always expected isn't it?

Oh yeah, even more so now. I just sit and shout bah humbug in my head lol. I love to live Christmas the way I used to but I just can't.

I smile my way through it for the benefit of others ... So I have nothing to feel guilty about. "

Quoted the wrong one.. whoops. Yeah same here as I couldn't take being responsible for bringing someone else down. It is hard tho to keep smiling.

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford

So just to say, I don't like the commercial side of Christmas. I have fond memories of Christmas, as a child, we had very little, but had lovely family Christmases. A lot of us have lost someone dear to us, mine is my darling Mum. We know she would still want us to enjoy Christmas, especially for my Dad. So we have a lovely family day, talk about our happy memories with her, some laughing, some crying, but it works for us. It is unlikely my Dad will be with us next year, so we will make it extra special for him.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Checks in and says I can't be arsed with it

Welcome

Having been on my own for about the last 6 years, I tend to just listen to music and don't even turn the telly on "

I have Xmas at my mum and dad's.

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By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman  over a year ago

stourbridge area

I work over Christmas and new year. .... I will see my little grandchildren Christmas day opening their presents ... but apart from that .... roll on the spring .

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Recently bereaved here absolutely dreading it we decorated purely for our sons sake but we really can't afford it tbh

Mrscxxx"

Yes I am recently bereaved too so on top of the other stuff it's tough

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

Yea and it's always expected isn't it?

Oh yeah, even more so now. I just sit and shout bah humbug in my head lol. I love to live Christmas the way I used to but I just can't.

I smile my way through it for the benefit of others ... So I have nothing to feel guilty about.

Quoted the wrong one.. whoops. Yeah same here as I couldn't take being responsible for bringing someone else down. It is hard tho to keep smiling. "

xxx

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford

I know not everyone can spend Christmas with their loved ones and some don't want to..I am privileged that I have a loving close family and it is a happy day for us

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"Recently bereaved here absolutely dreading it we decorated purely for our sons sake but we really can't afford it tbh

Mrscxxx

Yes I am recently bereaved too so on top of the other stuff it's tough "

It is tough, but what would that family member want you to do on Christmas day, it's difficult not to, but I'm sure they would want you to carry on as normal...x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

Yea and it's always expected isn't it?

No, it really isn't.

I think that most decent adults can accept and respect that some may like it and some may not - if you're humbugging, humbug away. If you're ho-ho-hoing do so! Don't try and mould people to your way of viewing it.

It's clearly a less than pleasant time for some - forced joviality are shite especially when the time of year carries so much emotional weight for many.

I hope that however you (a plural you!) choose to see in the season, you're kind to yourself and to others. That's the most important thing.

I'm playing devil's advocate here, so please be assured that this is not personal Meli.

You say I need to be kind to myself and others, but how are others being kind to me?

I have genuine reasons for not liking Christmas (It's not just the commercialisation of it).

However, I'm told off for being miserable, to cheer up etc. How is that being kind to me when all I want is to be left alone."

so are you saying you're not happy all year round what difference does it make that it's labelled Xmas, for me the holiday labelled Xmas means nothing in its biblical meaning because I see the Bible as fiction but the holiday and pending celebrations based on it are real so I enjoy that aspect, don't get taken along by the shopping extravaganza just enjoy it for the holiday that it is

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Recently bereaved here absolutely dreading it we decorated purely for our sons sake but we really can't afford it tbh

Mrscxxx

Yes I am recently bereaved too so on top of the other stuff it's tough "

Yup stupid all for one day I would buy him the world if I could but he will be lucky to get one or two presents

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.


"I'm playing devil's advocate here, so please be assured that this is not personal Meli.

You say I need to be kind to myself and others, but how are others being kind to me?

I have genuine reasons for not liking Christmas (It's not just the commercialisation of it).

However, I'm told off for being miserable, to cheer up etc. How is that being kind to me when all I want is to be left alone."

I know it's not personal, don't worry.

I think the being kind thing means that other people shouldn't tell you off for being miserable or tell you to cheer up etc. But it's not a utopian society where everyone will do that. Sadly I can't script everyones responses as much as I wish I could.

For me it means that yes, I understand some of my friends find this time of year difficult. I don't impose upon them a certain way of acting and I'm here if they want to talk or to listen. On the same hand, I hope they can respect my wishes to be merry.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Recently bereaved here absolutely dreading it we decorated purely for our sons sake but we really can't afford it tbh

Mrscxxx

Yes I am recently bereaved too so on top of the other stuff it's tough

Yup stupid all for one day I would buy him the world if I could but he will be lucky to get one or two presents"

But I am sure that he will appreciate those with all his heart ... It's not all about what money you spend, it's about loving him x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yeah it's fucking shite . It's all Consumer driven shit these days.It lasts almost a month now and by the 3 of December I've had my fill of Christmas songs and food having a Christmas twist .

The sooner it's Christmas over the better I've grown to really hate December.

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By *uryWhipMan  over a year ago

Harringay


"However, I'm told off for being miserable, to cheer up etc. How is that being kind to me when all I want is to be left alone."

Im like that too, not just at xmas. Actually stresses me out when people start getting on at me about cheering up. Think I must have told everyone I know 100 times I have issues with depression and anxiety so find it insenstive when are being overly jovial and telling me off for not being spirit of sonething.

You do you at the end of the day. Its your world, your reality to do with what you want.

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By *rincess peachWoman  over a year ago

shits creek

I wouldn't say I have sadness surrounding Xmas, I don't really feel anything toward it other than jealousy and resentment.

Same as every year I'll be working all through, have no time to see my family etc and even if I had the time, I don't have the funds.

Being surrounded by people who are wanting perfection but placing their perfection in the hands of another human. May sound daft, but I'm a waitress, and the amount of people who will kick off, and I mean kick off into a tirade of verbal abuse about "how you ruined their Xmas, their special time with their family" is madness. You think shit, this must be bad, what was so awful their Xmas got ruined?

They had to wait. That is the biggest issue I shit you not.

10 mins they sat there and nobody came over to them. Well grumpus, your waitress as you could clearly see was serving the table of 20 next to you and got to you as soon as she could.

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By *ce WingerMan  over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ


"Checks in and says I can't be arsed with it

Welcome

Having been on my own for about the last 6 years, I tend to just listen to music and don't even turn the telly on

I have Xmas at my mum and dad's. "

I have no family as such, but I do like this.

Gramatik - Just Jammin

www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHffJ0qC9Ko

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Christmas was my favourite time of year. I remember walking down the road and seeing my house covered in lights and I'd hurry my pace: my baby was home from uni and had put the lights up.

My eldest would come up to stay...I simply loved it. When they got boyfriends and my sister and her family moved nearby Christmas was a delightful time.

Now my children have families of their own, my sister is in Leeds and I have a partner who loathes Christmas.

For the first time I'm looking forward to the new year and not Christmas: it's no longer the same."

Feel for you, not an easy time.

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By *alking DisasterWoman  over a year ago

South Oxfordshire


"I hate Christmas and new year, I go thru the motions for the sake of others but I don't even put a tree up now. Roll on January for me too. I'd never ruin anyone else's but I am fed up of the fake smile I feel I need to put on for the sake of everyone else.

Yea and it's always expected isn't it?

No, it really isn't.

I think that most decent adults can accept and respect that some may like it and some may not - if you're humbugging, humbug away. If you're ho-ho-hoing do so! Don't try and mould people to your way of viewing it.

It's clearly a less than pleasant time for some - forced joviality are shite especially when the time of year carries so much emotional weight for many.

I hope that however you (a plural you!) choose to see in the season, you're kind to yourself and to others. That's the most important thing.

I'm playing devil's advocate here, so please be assured that this is not personal Meli.

You say I need to be kind to myself and others, but how are others being kind to me?

I have genuine reasons for not liking Christmas (It's not just the commercialisation of it).

However, I'm told off for being miserable, to cheer up etc. How is that being kind to me when all I want is to be left alone.so are you saying you're not happy all year round what difference does it make that it's labelled Xmas, for me the holiday labelled Xmas means nothing in its biblical meaning because I see the Bible as fiction but the holiday and pending celebrations based on it are real so I enjoy that aspect, don't get taken along by the shopping extravaganza just enjoy it for the holiday that it is "

That isn't what I meant by my post.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"However, I'm told off for being miserable, to cheer up etc. How is that being kind to me when all I want is to be left alone.

Im like that too, not just at xmas. Actually stresses me out when people start getting on at me about cheering up. Think I must have told everyone I know 100 times I have issues with depression and anxiety so find it insenstive when are being overly jovial and telling me off for not being spirit of sonething.

You do you at the end of the day. Its your world, your reality to do with what you want. "

Sending hugs, mental health is awful x

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By *alking DisasterWoman  over a year ago

South Oxfordshire


"I'm playing devil's advocate here, so please be assured that this is not personal Meli.

You say I need to be kind to myself and others, but how are others being kind to me?

I have genuine reasons for not liking Christmas (It's not just the commercialisation of it).

However, I'm told off for being miserable, to cheer up etc. How is that being kind to me when all I want is to be left alone.

I know it's not personal, don't worry.

I think the being kind thing means that other people shouldn't tell you off for being miserable or tell you to cheer up etc. But it's not a utopian society where everyone will do that. Sadly I can't script everyones responses as much as I wish I could.

For me it means that yes, I understand some of my friends find this time of year difficult. I don't impose upon them a certain way of acting and I'm here if they want to talk or to listen. On the same hand, I hope they can respect my wishes to be merry.

"

That means we'll get along perfectly

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I wouldn't say I have sadness surrounding Xmas, I don't really feel anything toward it other than jealousy and resentment.

Same as every year I'll be working all through, have no time to see my family etc and even if I had the time, I don't have the funds.

Being surrounded by people who are wanting perfection but placing their perfection in the hands of another human. May sound daft, but I'm a waitress, and the amount of people who will kick off, and I mean kick off into a tirade of verbal abuse about "how you ruined their Xmas, their special time with their family" is madness. You think shit, this must be bad, what was so awful their Xmas got ruined?

They had to wait. That is the biggest issue I shit you not.

10 mins they sat there and nobody came over to them. Well grumpus, your waitress as you could clearly see was serving the table of 20 next to you and got to you as soon as she could."

I cannot believe that people behave like this ... You absolutely get my sympathy and apologies for the ignorant twats who treat you this way x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I wouldn't say I have sadness surrounding Xmas, I don't really feel anything toward it other than jealousy and resentment.

Same as every year I'll be working all through, have no time to see my family etc and even if I had the time, I don't have the funds.

Being surrounded by people who are wanting perfection but placing their perfection in the hands of another human. May sound daft, but I'm a waitress, and the amount of people who will kick off, and I mean kick off into a tirade of verbal abuse about "how you ruined their Xmas, their special time with their family" is madness. You think shit, this must be bad, what was so awful their Xmas got ruined?

They had to wait. That is the biggest issue I shit you not.

10 mins they sat there and nobody came over to them. Well grumpus, your waitress as you could clearly see was serving the table of 20 next to you and got to you as soon as she could."

It's all.about respect for others, some are sadly lacking in this. Doesn't matter who you are or what job you are doing, still deserve to be treated with some decency and respect. Rant over

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By *eeBee67Man  over a year ago

Masked and Distant

Christmas has it's good and bad points.

Missing family members who are no longer with us.

Panicking about making ends meet with gifts and food.

But I do enjoy being with the ones I love, spending time together. It's not about Christmas, it's about people.

X

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By *alking DisasterWoman  over a year ago

South Oxfordshire


"I wouldn't say I have sadness surrounding Xmas, I don't really feel anything toward it other than jealousy and resentment.

Same as every year I'll be working all through, have no time to see my family etc and even if I had the time, I don't have the funds.

Being surrounded by people who are wanting perfection but placing their perfection in the hands of another human. May sound daft, but I'm a waitress, and the amount of people who will kick off, and I mean kick off into a tirade of verbal abuse about "how you ruined their Xmas, their special time with their family" is madness. You think shit, this must be bad, what was so awful their Xmas got ruined?

They had to wait. That is the biggest issue I shit you not.

10 mins they sat there and nobody came over to them. Well grumpus, your waitress as you could clearly see was serving the table of 20 next to you and got to you as soon as she could."

I get that one.

I worked as a waitress for years (although never worked Christmas Day or Boxing Day).

It shows that they can't actually speak to each other if they noticed how long it took to be served!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Christmas has it's good and bad points.

Missing family members who are no longer with us.

Panicking about making ends meet with gifts and food.

But I do enjoy being with the ones I love, spending time together. It's not about Christmas, it's about people.

X"

Yes and I realise I am blessed to still have my parents and appreciate that fact very much x

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By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman  over a year ago

stourbridge area

I always think of people who are alone on Christmas Day .

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By *eeBee67Man  over a year ago

Masked and Distant


"Christmas has it's good and bad points.

Missing family members who are no longer with us.

Panicking about making ends meet with gifts and food.

But I do enjoy being with the ones I love, spending time together. It's not about Christmas, it's about people.

X

Yes and I realise I am blessed to still have my parents and appreciate that fact very much x"

Hope you get chance to spend some quality fun time with them over Christmas x

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"Christmas has it's good and bad points.

Missing family members who are no longer with us.

Panicking about making ends meet with gifts and food.

But I do enjoy being with the ones I love, spending time together. It's not about Christmas, it's about people.

X"

Exactly this!

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"Christmas has it's good and bad points.

Missing family members who are no longer with us.

Panicking about making ends meet with gifts and food.

But I do enjoy being with the ones I love, spending time together. It's not about Christmas, it's about people.

X

Yes and I realise I am blessed to still have my parents and appreciate that fact very much x"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I only do Christmas because of my sister. I'm actually dreading this year one as I'm still recovering from a nasty knee fracture and my mobility is next to zero. I was hoping my wheelchair would no longer be around Christmas time, but unfortunately, as the break was really nasty, as all the doctors keep reminding me, I'm still not weight bearing. So no Christmas shopping (which is quite a relief), not able to do much cleaning either.

Like many others, I can't wait till the 26th of December, when all this madness is going to be over, for this year.

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"I only do Christmas because of my sister. I'm actually dreading this year one as I'm still recovering from a nasty knee fracture and my mobility is next to zero. I was hoping my wheelchair would no longer be around Christmas time, but unfortunately, as the break was really nasty, as all the doctors keep reminding me, I'm still not weight bearing. So no Christmas shopping (which is quite a relief), not able to do much cleaning either.

Like many others, I can't wait till the 26th of December, when all this madness is going to be over, for this year. "

Gosh, hope it gets better soon

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I always think of people who are alone on Christmas Day .

"

I always think of people who have to spend time with family they don't actually like, just because its Christmas and they feel they have to.

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"I always think of people who are alone on Christmas Day .

I always think of people who have to spend time with family they don't actually like, just because its Christmas and they feel they have to."

Luckily I don't have that problem, but I definitely wouldn't spend Christmas with people I didn't like

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Although I don't do Christmas I cope quite well with the few days around it. It's my birthday Christmas eve and always do something for that and boxing day I work (time and a half and a day off in lieu), Christmas day I'll do parkrun with my girlfriend and then send the day quite happily alone, I read, cook a nice meal and just relax, bit gutted there's no Dr Who this year though!

I never do anything to distract from other people's enjoyment of it but as an atheist, who's estranged from his family it is a pretty shit time of year for me. And I really hate the consumerism and greed.

What I hate and what pisses me off is other people's reactions over the next few weeks. If people ask what I'm doing I say I don't celebrate, this often prompts a 'don't you see your family' response and a snap judgement that I should make up with them. Or a discussion that it must upset my girlfriend that she doesn't get any presents (oddly when I question does that mean their partner measures their love by the gifts they are brought it never goes down well). Or the stock insults that I'm tight and miserable. People really do need to fuck off with their judgements!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I only do Christmas because of my sister. I'm actually dreading this year one as I'm still recovering from a nasty knee fracture and my mobility is next to zero. I was hoping my wheelchair would no longer be around Christmas time, but unfortunately, as the break was really nasty, as all the doctors keep reminding me, I'm still not weight bearing. So no Christmas shopping (which is quite a relief), not able to do much cleaning either.

Like many others, I can't wait till the 26th of December, when all this madness is going to be over, for this year. "

Sending hugs xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I always think of people who are alone on Christmas Day .

I always think of people who have to spend time with family they don't actually like, just because its Christmas and they feel they have to.

Luckily I don't have that problem, but I definitely wouldn't spend Christmas with people I didn't like "

Actually, same here, I am glad I have my parents so that I won't be totally alone x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Although I don't do Christmas I cope quite well with the few days around it. It's my birthday Christmas eve and always do something for that and boxing day I work (time and a half and a day off in lieu), Christmas day I'll do parkrun with my girlfriend and then send the day quite happily alone, I read, cook a nice meal and just relax, bit gutted there's no Dr Who this year though!

I never do anything to distract from other people's enjoyment of it but as an atheist, who's estranged from his family it is a pretty shit time of year for me. And I really hate the consumerism and greed.

What I hate and what pisses me off is other people's reactions over the next few weeks. If people ask what I'm doing I say I don't celebrate, this often prompts a 'don't you see your family' response and a snap judgement that I should make up with them. Or a discussion that it must upset my girlfriend that she doesn't get any presents (oddly when I question does that mean their partner measures their love by the gifts they are brought it never goes down well). Or the stock insults that I'm tight and miserable. People really do need to fuck off with their judgements!

"

Exactly! Completely agree with you ... And good for you for doing what is best for you x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Really can’t be doing with it to be honest. Don’t mind Christmas itself : few days off work etc. It’s the build up and it seems to get longer every year. Sucks balls. And not in a good way.

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"I always think of people who are alone on Christmas Day .

I always think of people who have to spend time with family they don't actually like, just because its Christmas and they feel they have to.

Luckily I don't have that problem, but I definitely wouldn't spend Christmas with people I didn't like

Actually, same here, I am glad I have my parents so that I won't be totally alone x"

Hugs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I find Christmas dinner one of the worst meals of the year .

Its such a rich heavy meal and you get to follow that with the heaviest pudding known to man and then you mix all that with chocolate and booze .

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Recently bereaved here absolutely dreading it we decorated purely for our sons sake but we really can't afford it tbh

Mrscxxx

Yes I am recently bereaved too so on top of the other stuff it's tough

It is tough, but what would that family member want you to do on Christmas day, it's difficult not to, but I'm sure they would want you to carry on as normal...x"

He loved Christmas (or presented like he did)

There was no clear reason for him deciding to end his life on this day.. I'd be sad on the anniversary of his death no matter what day.. but because it's 25th Dec.. there's a constant reminder from September onwards

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"Recently bereaved here absolutely dreading it we decorated purely for our sons sake but we really can't afford it tbh

Mrscxxx

Yes I am recently bereaved too so on top of the other stuff it's tough

It is tough, but what would that family member want you to do on Christmas day, it's difficult not to, but I'm sure they would want you to carry on as normal...x

He loved Christmas (or presented like he did)

There was no clear reason for him deciding to end his life on this day.. I'd be sad on the anniversary of his death no matter what day.. but because it's 25th Dec.. there's a constant reminder from September onwards "

So sorry...{{Hugs}}

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find Christmas dinner one of the worst meals of the year .

Its such a rich heavy meal and you get to follow that with the heaviest pudding known to man and then you mix all that with chocolate and booze ."

But you dont have to eat all of that.

There is no law that says you have to follow the herd and make yourself feel crap.

Just have a small meal with lots of veg, and a small glass of something

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By *ycra loutMan  over a year ago

york/Scarborough

I've just booked a table for 2 Xmas lunch..there might be a seat going spare

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find Christmas dinner one of the worst meals of the year .

Its such a rich heavy meal and you get to follow that with the heaviest pudding known to man and then you mix all that with chocolate and booze ."

It's basically a roast dinner.

I love Christmas pudding with lots of brandy butter

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan  over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

I don't hate Xmas exactly it's just with both parents gone and everyone else I know has large families, I just get fed up with it . I have purchased a doggy Xmas Pudding for Pooch though x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Although I don't do Christmas I cope quite well with the few days around it. It's my birthday Christmas eve and always do something for that and boxing day I work (time and a half and a day off in lieu), Christmas day I'll do parkrun with my girlfriend and then send the day quite happily alone, I read, cook a nice meal and just relax, bit gutted there's no Dr Who this year though!

I never do anything to distract from other people's enjoyment of it but as an atheist, who's estranged from his family it is a pretty shit time of year for me. And I really hate the consumerism and greed.

What I hate and what pisses me off is other people's reactions over the next few weeks. If people ask what I'm doing I say I don't celebrate, this often prompts a 'don't you see your family' response and a snap judgement that I should make up with them. Or a discussion that it must upset my girlfriend that she doesn't get any presents (oddly when I question does that mean their partner measures their love by the gifts they are brought it never goes down well). Or the stock insults that I'm tight and miserable. People really do need to fuck off with their judgements!

Exactly! Completely agree with you ... And good for you for doing what is best for you x"

It took me a long time to realise what is best for me. I spent years trying to do Christmas just to please people and making myself utterly miserable in the process.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Although I don't do Christmas I cope quite well with the few days around it. It's my birthday Christmas eve and always do something for that and boxing day I work (time and a half and a day off in lieu), Christmas day I'll do parkrun with my girlfriend and then send the day quite happily alone, I read, cook a nice meal and just relax, bit gutted there's no Dr Who this year though!

I never do anything to distract from other people's enjoyment of it but as an atheist, who's estranged from his family it is a pretty shit time of year for me. And I really hate the consumerism and greed.

What I hate and what pisses me off is other people's reactions over the next few weeks. If people ask what I'm doing I say I don't celebrate, this often prompts a 'don't you see your family' response and a snap judgement that I should make up with them. Or a discussion that it must upset my girlfriend that she doesn't get any presents (oddly when I question does that mean their partner measures their love by the gifts they are brought it never goes down well). Or the stock insults that I'm tight and miserable. People really do need to fuck off with their judgements!

Exactly! Completely agree with you ... And good for you for doing what is best for you x

It took me a long time to realise what is best for me. I spent years trying to do Christmas just to please people and making myself utterly miserable in the process. "

Good for you. Really. And credit to you for it x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I work over Christmas and new year. .... I will see my little grandchildren Christmas day opening their presents ... but apart from that .... roll on the spring ."

Sending love and hugs x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I don't hate Xmas exactly it's just with both parents gone and everyone else I know has large families, I just get fed up with it . I have purchased a doggy Xmas Pudding for Pooch though x"

Aww that's lovely x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I find Christmas dinner one of the worst meals of the year .

Its such a rich heavy meal and you get to follow that with the heaviest pudding known to man and then you mix all that with chocolate and booze .

But you dont have to eat all of that.

There is no law that says you have to follow the herd and make yourself feel crap.

Just have a small meal with lots of veg, and a small glass of something "

We don't eat any differently to any "normal" Sunday dinner, there's no need ... Especially as I am maintaining a big weight loss, my parents support me

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East


"As an Atheist, I would feel a total hypocrite celebrating it"

Christianity basically adopted existing traditions and re-wrote the story.

There always was a festival of some description at the darkest time of the year to scare away the bad spirits.

We inherited the cutting down of a tree and bringing it indoors from the Saxons or the Vikings, for example.

Now people have bought into this story about a refugee couple from the Middle East who were shunned wherever they went.

For one day of the year they feel sorry for a migrant from the Middle East, For the other 364 days, they want to shoot them.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS  over a year ago

Central

Not a Christmas fan in the slightest

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By *iamondCougarWoman  over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

I’m not a fan of Christmas at all but I try to embrace it for those around me and I put up an alternative tree.

The only good thing I like about this time of year is two weeks off from work then I can look forward to my skiing holiday woo hoo!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I wouldn't say I have sadness surrounding Xmas, I don't really feel anything toward it other than jealousy and resentment.

Same as every year I'll be working all through, have no time to see my family etc and even if I had the time, I don't have the funds.

Being surrounded by people who are wanting perfection but placing their perfection in the hands of another human. May sound daft, but I'm a waitress, and the amount of people who will kick off, and I mean kick off into a tirade of verbal abuse about "how you ruined their Xmas, their special time with their family" is madness. You think shit, this must be bad, what was so awful their Xmas got ruined?

They had to wait. That is the biggest issue I shit you not.

10 mins they sat there and nobody came over to them. Well grumpus, your waitress as you could clearly see was serving the table of 20 next to you and got to you as soon as she could."

I can already see people being grumpy to waitresses/ shop staff etc. I hate it. You're human too ffs. You're working in this stressful time and I'm not. So I try and give a smile and be nice in the hope that I might make their day not totally shite. At least one person appreciates them/ you very much.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I always think of people who are alone on Christmas Day .

I always think of people who have to spend time with family they don't actually like, just because its Christmas and they feel they have to."

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"I wouldn't say I have sadness surrounding Xmas, I don't really feel anything toward it other than jealousy and resentment.

Same as every year I'll be working all through, have no time to see my family etc and even if I had the time, I don't have the funds.

Being surrounded by people who are wanting perfection but placing their perfection in the hands of another human. May sound daft, but I'm a waitress, and the amount of people who will kick off, and I mean kick off into a tirade of verbal abuse about "how you ruined their Xmas, their special time with their family" is madness. You think shit, this must be bad, what was so awful their Xmas got ruined?

They had to wait. That is the biggest issue I shit you not.

10 mins they sat there and nobody came over to them. Well grumpus, your waitress as you could clearly see was serving the table of 20 next to you and got to you as soon as she could.

I can already see people being grumpy to waitresses/ shop staff etc. I hate it. You're human too ffs. You're working in this stressful time and I'm not. So I try and give a smile and be nice in the hope that I might make their day not totally shite. At least one person appreciates them/ you very much. "

I do too, after all they are the ones doing all the work and not their fault if they are short staffed

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Although I don't do Christmas I cope quite well with the few days around it. It's my birthday Christmas eve and always do something for that and boxing day I work (time and a half and a day off in lieu), Christmas day I'll do parkrun with my girlfriend and then send the day quite happily alone, I read, cook a nice meal and just relax, bit gutted there's no Dr Who this year though!

I never do anything to distract from other people's enjoyment of it but as an atheist, who's estranged from his family it is a pretty shit time of year for me. And I really hate the consumerism and greed.

What I hate and what pisses me off is other people's reactions over the next few weeks. If people ask what I'm doing I say I don't celebrate, this often prompts a 'don't you see your family' response and a snap judgement that I should make up with them. Or a discussion that it must upset my girlfriend that she doesn't get any presents (oddly when I question does that mean their partner measures their love by the gifts they are brought it never goes down well). Or the stock insults that I'm tight and miserable. People really do need to fuck off with their judgements!

Exactly! Completely agree with you ... And good for you for doing what is best for you x

It took me a long time to realise what is best for me. I spent years trying to do Christmas just to please people and making myself utterly miserable in the process. "

It's easier to lie. "Me and my girlfriend will be spending Christmas day together, we can't wait. What are you doing?" They smile and witter on about their xmas and you don't get the hassle of them slagging you off.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I wouldn't say I have sadness surrounding Xmas, I don't really feel anything toward it other than jealousy and resentment.

Same as every year I'll be working all through, have no time to see my family etc and even if I had the time, I don't have the funds.

Being surrounded by people who are wanting perfection but placing their perfection in the hands of another human. May sound daft, but I'm a waitress, and the amount of people who will kick off, and I mean kick off into a tirade of verbal abuse about "how you ruined their Xmas, their special time with their family" is madness. You think shit, this must be bad, what was so awful their Xmas got ruined?

They had to wait. That is the biggest issue I shit you not.

10 mins they sat there and nobody came over to them. Well grumpus, your waitress as you could clearly see was serving the table of 20 next to you and got to you as soon as she could.

I can already see people being grumpy to waitresses/ shop staff etc. I hate it. You're human too ffs. You're working in this stressful time and I'm not. So I try and give a smile and be nice in the hope that I might make their day not totally shite. At least one person appreciates them/ you very much.

I do too, after all they are the ones doing all the work and not their fault if they are short staffed "

Yeah sorry, my post made me sound like a right twat didn't it!

I know I'm not the only person that cares. I just meant in my scenario on that day when I was there. x

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"I wouldn't say I have sadness surrounding Xmas, I don't really feel anything toward it other than jealousy and resentment.

Same as every year I'll be working all through, have no time to see my family etc and even if I had the time, I don't have the funds.

Being surrounded by people who are wanting perfection but placing their perfection in the hands of another human. May sound daft, but I'm a waitress, and the amount of people who will kick off, and I mean kick off into a tirade of verbal abuse about "how you ruined their Xmas, their special time with their family" is madness. You think shit, this must be bad, what was so awful their Xmas got ruined?

They had to wait. That is the biggest issue I shit you not.

10 mins they sat there and nobody came over to them. Well grumpus, your waitress as you could clearly see was serving the table of 20 next to you and got to you as soon as she could.

I can already see people being grumpy to waitresses/ shop staff etc. I hate it. You're human too ffs. You're working in this stressful time and I'm not. So I try and give a smile and be nice in the hope that I might make their day not totally shite. At least one person appreciates them/ you very much.

I do too, after all they are the ones doing all the work and not their fault if they are short staffed

Yeah sorry, my post made me sound like a right twat didn't it!

I know I'm not the only person that cares. I just meant in my scenario on that day when I was there. x "

I know what you meant, lovely

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Not a Christmas fan in the slightest"

Glad it's not just me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We celebrate Yule, not Christmas, so Christmas Day's spent slobbing around, eating junk and watching Netflix. Ace.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"We celebrate Yule, not Christmas, so Christmas Day's spent slobbing around, eating junk and watching Netflix. Ace. "

Explain the difference please...? Thanks

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS  over a year ago

west here ford shire

I fully understand those who don’t like Christmas, for me this year is best Christmas for a long time, I wasn’t sure I would be here this Christmas, but I am and do I am going to enjoy every moment

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"We celebrate Yule, not Christmas, so Christmas Day's spent slobbing around, eating junk and watching Netflix. Ace.

Explain the difference please...? Thanks "

Yule marks the shortest day so takes place on the 21st of December. In all other respects it's exactly the same; family, presents and excessive eating and drinking.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Last a partner 2 weeks ago so this year will not be one to celebrate

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"Last a partner 2 weeks ago so this year will not be one to celebrate"

So sorry to hear that

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Thanks. Life goes on, she would kick my ass for not living it for sure

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By *orksRockerMan  over a year ago

Bradford

Separated.. this will be my 3rd Christmas on my own and I'm getting used to it, but will never enjoy it anymore.

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"Thanks. Life goes on, she would kick my ass for not living it for sure"

It does and good for you

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"Separated.. this will be my 3rd Christmas on my own and I'm getting used to it, but will never enjoy it anymore."

Yes, not a nice thing, been through that myself...

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By *orksRockerMan  over a year ago

Bradford


"Separated.. this will be my 3rd Christmas on my own and I'm getting used to it, but will never enjoy it anymore.

Yes, not a nice thing, been through that myself..."

Its not the day that I don't like... its the walking about in shopping centers and supermarkets with music and families and couples. THAT, I can do without.

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"Separated.. this will be my 3rd Christmas on my own and I'm getting used to it, but will never enjoy it anymore.

Yes, not a nice thing, been through that myself...

Its not the day that I don't like... its the walking about in shopping centers and supermarkets with music and families and couples. THAT, I can do without."

I can imagine and it starts so early too..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I will probably spend the day having dinner with my son n his family, then go home when my fwb gets back from dinner with his lot and no doubt buy my granddaughter a few things, but I don't celebrate Christmas as I am an atheist, so have had years where I have done absolutely bugger all, the same as the rest of the days. I dislike what it has become, intensely! Also, the fact that every advert on catch up tv is a bloody Christmas one, just makes me hate it more

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By *heLaserGuyMan  over a year ago

Coventry

Im facing the prospect of my first xmas alone, maybe parents for dinner but thats it really.

I cant even muster the enthusiasm to get the tree down lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I miss my mum and dad so much. Christmas hits me hard without them. The rest of the family, brother and sisters have all just gone their own way. Everyone is just " too busy working" to have some quality family time all year round so Christmas is quiet one for me and my son. Just glad we have each other. So for me, I'm not keen anymore. Just makes me sad.

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By *onny MCMan  over a year ago

Crawley

Xmas for us is just me, Mum and Dad, loved it as a kid but when it's just adults, it's a bit of an anti climax. Sure if I had kids or siblings with kids I'd get more into the spirit of it, but really it just feels like every other time the three of us sit down and have lunch together. Plus, I work shifts and they're retired so we rarely manage to do it on the 25th anyway. Workmates take the piss out of me offering to work extra shifts but I actually like the idea of giving someone who really appreciates it the time off with their kids.

Lots of love to all those besieged by bad memories at this time of year, those who feel forced into over spending or putting on a show of happiness when they really don't feel it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Recently bereaved here absolutely dreading it we decorated purely for our sons sake but we really can't afford it tbh

Mrscxxx

Yes I am recently bereaved too so on top of the other stuff it's tough

It is tough, but what would that family member want you to do on Christmas day, it's difficult not to, but I'm sure they would want you to carry on as normal...x

He loved Christmas (or presented like he did)

There was no clear reason for him deciding to end his life on this day.. I'd be sad on the anniversary of his death no matter what day.. but because it's 25th Dec.. there's a constant reminder from September onwards

So sorry...{{Hugs}}"

thank you. X

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By *e DevilMan  over a year ago

Blantyre

Sad reading this thread. Everyone goes through bad times throughout the year , not just at xmas. I think some of you need professional support groups, not a Fab thread, and i mean that in the best possible way not a dig . The mere fact your still on Fab tells me you all understand that life goes on and life is for living and you are still enjoying your wee carnal pleasures . Again i do have sympathy for lots of the above issues but airing them on a swingers site by humbugging xmas is a bit off.

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By *rTouretteMan  over a year ago

Muswell Hill

I'll be spending the Xmas/new year period at home and mostly alone. Divorced, no kids. Ignoring it basically.

It was fun as a kid, but just time off work these days.

December is usually good for plenty of catching up with old friends for a drink, and I look forward to the lengthening daylight after the winter solstice.

Summary: meh

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By *eelouWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow


"Sad reading this thread. Everyone goes through bad times throughout the year , not just at xmas. I think some of you need professional support groups, not a Fab thread, and i mean that in the best possible way not a dig . The mere fact your still on Fab tells me you all understand that life goes on and life is for living and you are still enjoying your wee carnal pleasures . Again i do have sympathy for lots of the above issues but airing them on a swingers site by humbugging xmas is a bit off. "

Sorry but why shouldn't we talk on here about stuff? So what if it's a swingers site, we're all still human.

If you don't agree simply don't comment. Easy.

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By *amissCouple  over a year ago

chelmsford


"Sad reading this thread. Everyone goes through bad times throughout the year , not just at xmas. I think some of you need professional support groups, not a Fab thread, and i mean that in the best possible way not a dig . The mere fact your still on Fab tells me you all understand that life goes on and life is for living and you are still enjoying your wee carnal pleasures . Again i do have sympathy for lots of the above issues but airing them on a swingers site by humbugging xmas is a bit off.

Sorry but why shouldn't we talk on here about stuff? So what if it's a swingers site, we're all still human.

If you don't agree simply don't comment. Easy."

that was the whole idea of the thread, I thought.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Throwing my scrooge hat in here. Boooooooo.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I simply can't be arsed with it's false happiness, and incessant push to drive people into huge debt by proclaiming 'Christmas is about TV's' or 'Christmas is about phones' or buy my £200 bottle of smell nice because Charline Theron writhes around a screen/poster.

To see such indulgence alongside the queues for the food banks, and the countless homeless sleeping rough makes me sad.

Roll on December the 26th and the signal that it's all over until October '19

I completely agree "

My thoughts exactly. Any room left in the group for a little one?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/12/18 18:28:32]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I like the idea of Christmas but hate the reality. It's not about peace on earth and goodwill to all men to an excuse to overspend over eat and drink too much while not sparing a thought for those less fortunate.

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By *tephanie nee will50Man  over a year ago

middlesbrough

[Removed by poster at 01/12/18 18:42:04]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As an Atheist, I would feel a total hypocrite celebrating it

Christianity basically adopted existing traditions and re-wrote the story.

There always was a festival of some description at the darkest time of the year to scare away the bad spirits.

We inherited the cutting down of a tree and bringing it indoors from the Saxons or the Vikings, for example.

Now people have bought into this story about a refugee couple from the Middle East who were shunned wherever they went.

For one day of the year they feel sorry for a migrant from the Middle East, For the other 364 days, they want to shoot them.

"

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"We celebrate Yule, not Christmas, so Christmas Day's spent slobbing around, eating junk and watching Netflix. Ace.

Explain the difference please...? Thanks

Yule marks the shortest day so takes place on the 21st of December. In all other respects it's exactly the same; family, presents and excessive eating and drinking. "

Ahh, okay

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Last a partner 2 weeks ago so this year will not be one to celebrate"

sorry to hear that x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Separated.. this will be my 3rd Christmas on my own and I'm getting used to it, but will never enjoy it anymore."

You may meet another...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yes!!!!!! I've managed to wangle 'the big day' at work. I can let it pass by unnoticed.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I will probably spend the day having dinner with my son n his family, then go home when my fwb gets back from dinner with his lot and no doubt buy my granddaughter a few things, but I don't celebrate Christmas as I am an atheist, so have had years where I have done absolutely bugger all, the same as the rest of the days. I dislike what it has become, intensely! Also, the fact that every advert on catch up tv is a bloody Christmas one, just makes me hate it more "

I get this completely

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Im facing the prospect of my first xmas alone, maybe parents for dinner but thats it really.

I cant even muster the enthusiasm to get the tree down lol"

You must follow your heart...

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I miss my mum and dad so much. Christmas hits me hard without them. The rest of the family, brother and sisters have all just gone their own way. Everyone is just " too busy working" to have some quality family time all year round so Christmas is quiet one for me and my son. Just glad we have each other. So for me, I'm not keen anymore. Just makes me sad. "

Loneliness is a huge thing all year round but gets magnified this time of year x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Xmas for us is just me, Mum and Dad, loved it as a kid but when it's just adults, it's a bit of an anti climax. Sure if I had kids or siblings with kids I'd get more into the spirit of it, but really it just feels like every other time the three of us sit down and have lunch together. Plus, I work shifts and they're retired so we rarely manage to do it on the 25th anyway. Workmates take the piss out of me offering to work extra shifts but I actually like the idea of giving someone who really appreciates it the time off with their kids.

Lots of love to all those besieged by bad memories at this time of year, those who feel forced into over spending or putting on a show of happiness when they really don't feel it. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'll be spending the Xmas/new year period at home and mostly alone. Divorced, no kids. Ignoring it basically.

It was fun as a kid, but just time off work these days.

December is usually good for plenty of catching up with old friends for a drink, and I look forward to the lengthening daylight after the winter solstice.

Summary: meh "

Couldn't have put it better myself

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Sad reading this thread. Everyone goes through bad times throughout the year , not just at xmas. I think some of you need professional support groups, not a Fab thread, and i mean that in the best possible way not a dig . The mere fact your still on Fab tells me you all understand that life goes on and life is for living and you are still enjoying your wee carnal pleasures . Again i do have sympathy for lots of the above issues but airing them on a swingers site by humbugging xmas is a bit off.

Sorry but why shouldn't we talk on here about stuff? So what if it's a swingers site, we're all still human.

If you don't agree simply don't comment. Easy."

Oh he can have his say ... Doesn't mean I agree with it though

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Throwing my scrooge hat in here. Boooooooo."

I'm not even Scrooge, those who want to enjoy it can get on with it... I love to see little kids this time of year to be fair because really that's all Xmas is for these days

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I simply can't be arsed with it's false happiness, and incessant push to drive people into huge debt by proclaiming 'Christmas is about TV's' or 'Christmas is about phones' or buy my £200 bottle of smell nice because Charline Theron writhes around a screen/poster.

To see such indulgence alongside the queues for the food banks, and the countless homeless sleeping rough makes me sad.

Roll on December the 26th and the signal that it's all over until October '19

I completely agree

My thoughts exactly. Any room left in the group for a little one? "

Of course

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No naughty “C” word for us we’re on lock down , sooooo over rated nowadays

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I like the idea of Christmas but hate the reality. It's not about peace on earth and goodwill to all men to an excuse to overspend over eat and drink too much while not sparing a thought for those less fortunate. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think christmas should be like a leap year,once every four years. Our grand daughter's birthday is a week before christmas & have a job to find birthday cards & wrapping paper that isn't christmasy. It's nice to see the children all excited ,but its all become too comercialized.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Yes!!!!!! I've managed to wangle 'the big day' at work. I can let it pass by unnoticed. "

That's a win for you

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