FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Why is it so hard to click with people.
Why is it so hard to click with people.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
because many things come into play, you want someone you can chat to, have a laugh with, someone you fancy and someone ultimately you can get naked with, it's not easy |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. because many things come into play, you want someone you can chat to, have a laugh with, someone you fancy and someone ultimately you can get naked with, it's not easy "
When you describe it like that it makes it sound like we should be on a dating site not a swingers site. Lol.
Just to be clear I am not looking for a romantic partner! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When it happens its great... doesn't happen very often though and you can't make it happen .. worth the wait though  "
Yeah I have patience but it's a pain when your in that really naughty mood and you got no one to fuck lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. because many things come into play, you want someone you can chat to, have a laugh with, someone you fancy and someone ultimately you can get naked with, it's not easy
When you describe it like that it makes it sound like we should be on a dating site not a swingers site. Lol.
Just to be clear I am not looking for a romantic partner! "
yes but that's you and we're all here for different reasons and have differing objectives |
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It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here."
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too. |
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too. "
I can identify with that. I usually like to chat with someone for a while and have real conversations before I decide I want to meet them. When you're the kind of person who invests time and effort getting to know people, you need to know it works both ways and you're not just being played by an 'anyhole' (an asshole who will tell you anything you want to hear to get sex). It's a pretty good indication that if someone is rushing you, they may not be what you're looking for.
Great ones do come along though. Don't give up hope! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too. "
I'm a conversationalist |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too. "
If it starts off straight away as all sex/meeting talk it can all be a bit flat really can't it. I like to get to know people a bit first too. |
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By *r.BlondeMan
over a year ago
Chester/Wirral |
"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
I think it is the wrong place really. Not many are looking for a connection on here. The phone is used to set dates to meet though in my opinion. Only so much you could say on here an can be boring and seem like time wasting if people wanna play message tennis. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too.
If it starts off straight away as all sex/meeting talk it can all be a bit flat really can't it. I like to get to know people a bit first too."
that is exactly that.... conversation is very flat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too.
If it starts off straight away as all sex/meeting talk it can all be a bit flat really can't it. I like to get to know people a bit first too.
that is exactly that.... conversation is very flat."
Some people are ok but the chemistry only starts when you are on cam or on the phone and talking about real world things. After all many people on here are also on various dating sites so you should find a few who are compatible. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The lack of non verbal signals that we all rely on away from fab can make it difficult at times to get to know anyone on here, especially if coupled with the inherent doubts that people may say what they think you want to hear. It's harder, not impossible, to disguise those signals face to face.
Yet just talking to some here, it can still flow, grow, or give a little insight to the person behind the screen.
It may be an imperfect medium, yet it allows us to find others we may never otherwise have known, and to get a feel for others and what they may be seeking, not just sex, but also how far we may connect on all levels. |
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"The lack of non verbal signals that we all rely on away from fab can make it difficult at times to get to know anyone on here, especially if coupled with the inherent doubts that people may say what they think you want to hear. It's harder, not impossible, to disguise those signals face to face.
Yet just talking to some here, it can still flow, grow, or give a little insight to the person behind the screen.
It may be an imperfect medium, yet it allows us to find others we may never otherwise have known, and to get a feel for others and what they may be seeking, not just sex, but also how far we may connect on all levels."
Well said  |
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I think it's not just men - we like to chat and get to know people first too. We recognise that other people are different but find it hard with many women and couples as well.
We think we're getting better at recognising the profiles that are more like us, and most of our success has come when we've messaged them first.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe try a social event? It's difficult chatting online sometimes.
I get on with someone then they go quiet as they've moved on to someone better. "
Sounds familiar.
Still there's always someone better than me. And not much I can do to change the perceptions of others....
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
I'm gonna say, that as a typically shy bloke, I find it really hard to break into a closed group, either in a pub, at work or even in a club. However once I've been given an icebreaker, then I'm out of my shell in no time at all.
As for FAB being sterile, there's some truth in that. But I've got two pen pals that I contact several times a day/week. One of those has resulted in a meet already. Only geography and time tend to get in the way.
The great thing about FAB is it just works for me, my words and photos can do the legwork for me. I would never meet this many great people in Vanilla Land. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Maybe try a social event? It's difficult chatting online sometimes.
I get on with someone then they go quiet as they've moved on to someone better. "
Would love to do a social event but I am so shy by nature and couldn't face going on my own. |
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"Maybe try a social event? It's difficult chatting online sometimes.
I get on with someone then they go quiet as they've moved on to someone better. "
I'm familiar with that... And then a few months later you suddenly get 'Hi' after being pretty much being dropped. It's a big part of why I just gave up. The shampoo-rinse-repeat cycle was playing havoc with my hair  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm gonna say, that as a typically shy bloke, I find it really hard to break into a closed group, either in a pub, at work or even in a club. However once I've been given an icebreaker, then I'm out of my shell in no time at all.
As for FAB being sterile, there's some truth in that. But I've got two pen pals that I contact several times a day/week. One of those has resulted in a meet already. Only geography and time tend to get in the way.
The great thing about FAB is it just works for me, my words and photos can do the legwork for me. I would never meet this many great
people in Vanilla Land. "
Well said. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too.
If it starts off straight away as all sex/meeting talk it can all be a bit flat really can't it. I like to get to know people a bit first too.
that is exactly that.... conversation is very flat.
Some people are ok but the chemistry only starts when you are on cam or on the phone and talking about real world things. After all many people on here are also on various dating sites so you should find a few who are compatible. "
I've 'clicked' with quite a few folk on here over the years through messaging alone. There's personal preferences involved here. Some can convey themselves well with text and not so much in person. Or vice versa. Or neither or both. Everyone is different. Some don't even want to get to know each other and just want to jump each others bones. |
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
"Maybe try a social event? It's difficult chatting online sometimes.
I get on with someone then they go quiet as they've moved on to someone better.
Would love to do a social event but I am so shy by nature and couldn't face going on my own. "
I've mentioned this already in the forum.
But this year I've done nude sunbathing, visited a couple of naturist camps and even visited the same club 3 times in September/October.
All of this on my own. So a woman like yourself should just find some sexy gear that you feel real comfy in, bite the bullet and just pick a club nearby and treat it like a watch and learn session and before you know it...
I know about the moving on situation, not pleasant I know, but life is like that.
Call the club a week beforehand and chat to them, if they respond well enough, you'll feel less anxious.
You should arrange a meet up, in the Meets/events tab and post your invite.
Good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Maybe try a social event? It's difficult chatting online sometimes.
I get on with someone then they go quiet as they've moved on to someone better.
Would love to do a social event but I am so shy by nature and couldn't face going on my own.
I've mentioned this already in the forum.
But this year I've done nude sunbathing, visited a couple of naturist camps and even visited the same club 3 times in September/October.
All of this on my own. So a woman like yourself should just find some sexy gear that you feel real comfy in, bite the bullet and just pick a club nearby and treat it like a watch and learn session and before you know it...
I know about the moving on situation, not pleasant I know, but life is like that.
Call the club a week beforehand and chat to them, if they respond well enough, you'll feel less anxious.
You should arrange a meet up, in the Meets/events tab and post your invite.
Good luck."
wow you sound like you have nailed the social part of it .
it will happen soon, maybe I should organise something for my Birthday  |
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
"Maybe try a social event? It's difficult chatting online sometimes.
I get on with someone then they go quiet as they've moved on to someone better.
Would love to do a social event but I am so shy by nature and couldn't face going on my own.
I've mentioned this already in the forum.
But this year I've done nude sunbathing, visited a couple of naturist camps and even visited the same club 3 times in September/October.
All of this on my own. So a woman like yourself should just find some sexy gear that you feel real comfy in, bite the bullet and just pick a club nearby and treat it like a watch and learn session and before you know it...
I know about the moving on situation, not pleasant I know, but life is like that.
Call the club a week beforehand and chat to them, if they respond well enough, you'll feel less anxious.
You should arrange a meet up, in the Meets/events tab and post your invite.
Good luck.
wow you sound like you have nailed the social part of it .
it will happen soon, maybe I should organise something for my Birthday "
I wouldn't say nailed it, more a case of not panicking |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe try a social event? It's difficult chatting online sometimes.
I get on with someone then they go quiet as they've moved on to someone better. "
The way I see it, is if someone is really interested, they will demonstrate that.
If they dont, then they weren't terribly interested in the first place.
Im done making shedloads of effort and it not being reciprocated.
Its extremely dull and Im worth more than that |
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
I prefer to get to know someone before meeting up for fun, I have no problem with tennis emails for a while. As you get to know a bit about them, so hopefully you feel more relaxed when you are with them. |
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too. "
Yes, very much this - if the only point of the conversation is to get you to meet it is hollow. That is the reason I talk to people - but there has to be more for me, that alone isn't enough, I want fwb I can have a laugh with too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Must admit I find it very difficult to shine at text messaging, from a man's point of view, when you spend time composing a message to someone then don't get a reply, or it remains unread or deleted, it gets quite disheartening and I now find it harder to be witty and original than when I first joined |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too.
Yes, very much this - if the only point of the conversation is to get you to meet it is hollow. That is the reason I talk to people - but there has to be more for me, that alone isn't enough, I want fwb I can have a laugh with too."
I totally agree with you on this! I actually find it hard to be aroused and perform satisfactorily for all parties involved if it's with someone I don't feel at ease with or with enough chemistry.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too.
Yes, very much this - if the only point of the conversation is to get you to meet it is hollow. That is the reason I talk to people - but there has to be more for me, that alone isn't enough, I want fwb I can have a laugh with too.
I totally agree with you on this! I actually find it hard to be aroused and perform satisfactorily for all parties involved if it's with someone I don't feel at ease with or with enough chemistry.
"
So glad I'm not the only one! Having sex without that chemistry is pointless in my eyes. |
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I just seem to find a lot of the conversations are empty because the guys just want to meet. I know that's the end goal but I like the natural conversation part of it too.
Yes, very much this - if the only point of the conversation is to get you to meet it is hollow. That is the reason I talk to people - but there has to be more for me, that alone isn't enough, I want fwb I can have a laugh with too.
I totally agree with you on this! I actually find it hard to be aroused and perform satisfactorily for all parties involved if it's with someone I don't feel at ease with or with enough chemistry.
So glad I'm not the only one! Having sex without that chemistry is pointless in my eyes. "
Actually I find the on line medium difficult to work with
Chemistry for me comes from more than words and pretty pictures , tone of voice , facial expressions, eyes , and body gestures
Conveying nuance , and other subtle messages is almost impossible via text
I'm difficult to read , but it's a moment of magic when I find someone who can |
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
No idea. I like your avatar though. |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
It can be very hard to relate to somebody when the information is just on the screen. At the beginning of an exchange of messages people tend not to want to give too much personal information away.
Another problem is that often messages are closed and don't allow for a conversation to build.
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
I completely agree x |
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Its because the mutual result is sex. Get that first fuck out of the way and have a laugh and a chat afterwards, maybe a cuddle if you're into it....just before round two. No chemistry, don't meet again. Meet somewhere public though, to be safe.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i have met women i would have thought were never interested in me. a message led to a conversation away from fab and then on to meeting.
im always surprised by how the conversation goes, a mutual interest, laughing about something and its not always sex talk.
just nice women im glad to call friends |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe try a social event? It's difficult chatting online sometimes.
I get on with someone then they go quiet as they've moved on to someone better.
Would love to do a social event but I am so shy by nature and couldn't face going on my own. "
Looks like you've just answered your own question.
Do you think your shyness could come through on your messages?
I click with guys on here all the time, doesn't always amount to a meet but I enjoy chatting to them.
I'm the same in the real world though.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe try a social event? It's difficult chatting online sometimes.
I get on with someone then they go quiet as they've moved on to someone better.
Would love to do a social event but I am so shy by nature and couldn't face going on my own.
Looks like you've just answered your own question.
Do you think your shyness could come through on your messages?
I click with guys on here all the time, doesn't always amount to a meet but I enjoy chatting to them.
I'm the same in the real world though.
"
shy and unassuming with great butt cheeks on show? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its because the mutual result is sex. Get that first fuck out of the way and have a laugh and a chat afterwards, maybe a cuddle if you're into it....just before round two. No chemistry, don't meet again. Meet somewhere public though, to be safe.
"
If there's no chemistry why would you want to have sex in the first place? |
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I alwaays smile when someone complains about finding it difficult to meet someone when if their profile is read, and adhered to by the reader, they are eliminating so many potentials based on physical traits only.
It's all very well describing your ideal sexual partner and saying that's all your interested in, but how many of us are actually with, or have had good proper relationships with, a person who we would not now describe as our perfect physical wo/man? |
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
Only you know the answer to this question .
For many people it isn’t hard at all . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find.
Only you know the answer to this question .
For many people it isn’t hard at all ."
you're right it's not hard for me at minute |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
It's not so much it's hard to click with people as finding people you click with - but that's only natural, most of us can't all get on with everyone to the point of wanting to get intimate with them - it takes a connection and chemistry on some level for that.
Like anything in life, some people are passing connections that you spend a brief time with, others it goes deeper and you just "click" and conversation flows effortlessly and seamlessly without thinking about it - and it's those people that are a little harder to find, but worth it all the more for it |
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find.
Only you know the answer to this question .
For many people it isn’t hard at all .you're right it's not hard for me at minute "
Happy days |
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"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here."
I disagree. I feel a lot of warmth from people I have never met. |
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"Maybe try a social event? It's difficult chatting online sometimes.
I get on with someone then they go quiet as they've moved on to someone better.
Would love to do a social event but I am so shy by nature and couldn't face going on my own.
I've mentioned this already in the forum.
But this year I've done nude sunbathing, visited a couple of naturist camps and even visited the same club 3 times in September/October.
All of this on my own. So a woman like yourself should just find some sexy gear that you feel real comfy in, bite the bullet and just pick a club nearby and treat it like a watch and learn session and before you know it...
I know about the moving on situation, not pleasant I know, but life is like that.
Call the club a week beforehand and chat to them, if they respond well enough, you'll feel less anxious.
You should arrange a meet up, in the Meets/events tab and post your invite.
Good luck.
wow you sound like you have nailed the social part of it .
it will happen soon, maybe I should organise something for my Birthday "
There is a thread for women who want to go to a club as singles, to encourage them to go. They mainly go to VA and JayDees which might be a bit far for you, but there might be someone who would meet up with you to go with you somewhere closer. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I suppose it depends on what sort of click you are looking for.
Sure sex with soulmate is the best, the ultimate high.
But NSA is fulfilling a need without the complications of a relationship and requires a different type of click.
It is a challenge to convey desire and interest without straying into 'dating'.
I like the forum because you get much more of a feel for people and you are not working blind.
Q
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
With me I actually end up friend zoning a lot of people
Mainly because I am not quiet what they are looking for but I am a polite and chatty so end up just having a natter
Sometimes I should be more assertive but I am not the best lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
You have only been here a few weeks, it takes time and effort to find what you are looking for. Fancy a fuck while you are waiting |
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By *obbo44Man
over a year ago
Swansea |
I find it better to go to the socials and meet people there and have a yap and a drink feels more natural than having a chat on here and after a few times bumping into each other in the socials if the connections there you'll know ,but saying that I have seen a few and thought fuck the connection I'd get down and dirty with you without saying a word in front of everyone lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A lot of men on here arent always who they say they are..  "
but you pick them so only got yourself to blame.
do better research before you meet as moaning about it after shows your lack of poor judgement.
and the guy is clearly clever enough to see your an easy target and believe anything.
who is the fool? the fool or the fool that follows him?
|
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"A lot of men on here arent always who they say they are..
but you pick them so only got yourself to blame.
do better research before you meet as moaning about it after shows your lack of poor judgement.
and the guy is clearly clever enough to see your an easy target and believe anything.
Oooooooo Pat ...... quite true ....
who is the fool? the fool or the fool that follows him?
"
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’ve messed your message up ha ha xx"
and look at the women who copied that ladies comment. one of them had issues with a man only recently and broadcast it to the world so it all comes back to your poor choices.
no one likes hearing the truth but something is wrong with you if you keep making the same mistakes over and over.
its all in your favour ladies to pick the right guys. you have loads to pick from here.
ive no sympathy for you.sorry
|
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"I’ve messed your message up ha ha xx
and look at the women who copied that ladies comment. one of them had issues with a man only recently and broadcast it to the world so it all comes back to your poor choices.
no one likes hearing the truth but something is wrong with you if you keep making the same mistakes over and over.
I’m getting the popcorn out for this comment
its all in your favour ladies to pick the right guys. you have loads to pick from here.
ive no sympathy for you.sorry
"
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I alwaays smile when someone complains about finding it difficult to meet someone when if their profile is read, and adhered to by the reader, they are eliminating so many potentials based on physical traits only.
It's all very well describing your ideal sexual partner and saying that's all your interested in, but how many of us are actually with, or have had good proper relationships with, a person who we would not now describe as our perfect physical wo/man?"
But for some of us, that's what we are here for.
Personally, I'm not here looking for a relationship I'm here looking for sex. I'm looking to fulfil a physical need with people I find physically attractive.
It always makes me smile when I see people on here complaining about others having physical preferences like everyone should meet them because they're "nice" and "genuine ". Sorry not here to bump uglies with someone I don't find sttractive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Btw I forget to mention I'm international playboy Tony stark.
And I'll fuck you till you can't walk with my iron man suit on.
Then fly out the window on to the next.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A lot of men on here arent always who they say they are..
but you pick them so only got yourself to blame.
do better research before you meet as moaning about it after shows your lack of poor judgement.
and the guy is clearly clever enough to see your an easy target and believe anything.
who is the fool? the fool or the fool that follows him?
"
How can anyone do better research if the person is a liar? They will just lie. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
Hello. I’m a scientist and I can teach you all about chemistry. And so much more. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
Because everybody else wants to fuck and go and doesn't even want to know your name. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find.
Hello. I’m a scientist and I can teach you all about chemistry. And so much more."
Not with those chat up lines. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It's not a dating site..so people have different expectations..I think swinging has got too complicated now..if you want more, and there is nothing wrong with that, and yes there is to be an attraction..but how far does that go regarding other things..surely, if you are looking for more than one off meets then it's not really a swinging style sex meet you are after, it's more of a relationship you want |
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By *isty286Couple
over a year ago
Dorset |
We like to keep it simple, not looking for that click before we play, we are not after a full swap anyway, just happy to watch and be watched, it's more about enhancing our sex together than seeking others to do it with us. |
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By *obbo44Man
over a year ago
Swansea |
"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
I suppose it boils down to how many times you are prepared to meet someone and how long you are prepared to wait before jumping into bed with them , most people are happy to meet someone sleep with them pick up their veri and then onto the next, That way no connection would ever be made , where as if you have spent time chatting and have met a few times at different socials and you do fancy each other then the connection and sex would be better when you finally did get involved ,if this site is treated like a sex site then that's what you will get if that's what you look for, although I find it easier to go to town on a weekend if I wanted to find that, but if I wanted to play out some fantasies I would see who likes what I like and put the effort and time in getting to know them , do you want to play in as many parks as you can or swing in your favourites
Just my opinion though |
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"I’ve messed your message up ha ha xx
and look at the women who copied that ladies comment. one of them had issues with a man only recently and broadcast it to the world so it all comes back to your poor choices.
no one likes hearing the truth but something is wrong with you if you keep making the same mistakes over and over.
its all in your favour ladies to pick the right guys. you have loads to pick from here.
ive no sympathy for you.sorry
"
Charming viewpoint. |
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"I alwaays smile when someone complains about finding it difficult to meet someone when if their profile is read, and adhered to by the reader, they are eliminating so many potentials based on physical traits only.
It's all very well describing your ideal sexual partner and saying that's all your interested in, but how many of us are actually with, or have had good proper relationships with, a person who we would not now describe as our perfect physical wo/man?
But for some of us, that's what we are here for.
Personally, I'm not here looking for a relationship I'm here looking for sex. I'm looking to fulfil a physical need with people I find physically attractive.
It always makes me smile when I see people on here complaining about others having physical preferences like everyone should meet them because they're "nice" and "genuine ". Sorry not here to bump uglies with someone I don't find sttractive."
And if you (general you, not you you) find that ideal person/s based on your specific requests then great. But folk shouldn't moan when they can't find what they're looking for, because someone who would give them the shag of their life but actually reads profiles will not contact them because he's 5' 10" and not 6'. Or have blue eyes instead of grey. Have a five pack, not a six. |
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"I’ve messed your message up ha ha xx
and look at the women who copied that ladies comment. one of them had issues with a man only recently and broadcast it to the world so it all comes back to your poor choices.
no one likes hearing the truth but something is wrong with you if you keep making the same mistakes over and over.
its all in your favour ladies to pick the right guys. you have loads to pick from here.
ive no sympathy for you.sorry
Charming viewpoint. "
A valid one all the same. Whenever I hear some woman saying all men are bastards, or some bloke saying all women are bitches, I point out it's only the ones they choose. People love to blame others for their choices. |
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"I’ve messed your message up ha ha xx
and look at the women who copied that ladies comment. one of them had issues with a man only recently and broadcast it to the world so it all comes back to your poor choices.
no one likes hearing the truth but something is wrong with you if you keep making the same mistakes over and over.
its all in your favour ladies to pick the right guys. you have loads to pick from here.
ive no sympathy for you.sorry
Charming viewpoint.
A valid one all the same. Whenever I hear some woman saying all men are bastards, or some bloke saying all women are bitches, I point out it's only the ones they choose. People love to blame others for their choices."
So you are saying don't trust anyone until they prove they aren't manipulative arseholes then? |
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"I’ve messed your message up ha ha xx
and look at the women who copied that ladies comment. one of them had issues with a man only recently and broadcast it to the world so it all comes back to your poor choices.
no one likes hearing the truth but something is wrong with you if you keep making the same mistakes over and over.
its all in your favour ladies to pick the right guys. you have loads to pick from here.
ive no sympathy for you.sorry
Charming viewpoint.
A valid one all the same. Whenever I hear some woman saying all men are bastards, or some bloke saying all women are bitches, I point out it's only the ones they choose. People love to blame others for their choices.
So you are saying don't trust anyone until they prove they aren't manipulative arseholes then?"
Er, no. That's not what I'm saying. |
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"I’ve messed your message up ha ha xx
and look at the women who copied that ladies comment. one of them had issues with a man only recently and broadcast it to the world so it all comes back to your poor choices.
no one likes hearing the truth but something is wrong with you if you keep making the same mistakes over and over.
its all in your favour ladies to pick the right guys. you have loads to pick from here.
ive no sympathy for you.sorry
Charming viewpoint.
A valid one all the same. Whenever I hear some woman saying all men are bastards, or some bloke saying all women are bitches, I point out it's only the ones they choose. People love to blame others for their choices.
So you are saying don't trust anyone until they prove they aren't manipulative arseholes then?
Er, no. That's not what I'm saying."
But if I keep picking manipulative arseholes, then apparently (according to your post above) it's my fault for picking them each time. |
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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago
Craggy Island |
"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
The curse of all social media, sex site or not.
We can't interact with people face to face, and so we miss out on vital body language and facial expression which is why some people struggle to make a connection on all social media platforms. As we intend to replace their meanings of the message with our own emotional understanding of the written text. |
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"I’ve messed your message up ha ha xx
and look at the women who copied that ladies comment. one of them had issues with a man only recently and broadcast it to the world so it all comes back to your poor choices.
no one likes hearing the truth but something is wrong with you if you keep making the same mistakes over and over.
its all in your favour ladies to pick the right guys. you have loads to pick from here.
ive no sympathy for you.sorry
Charming viewpoint.
A valid one all the same. Whenever I hear some woman saying all men are bastards, or some bloke saying all women are bitches, I point out it's only the ones they choose. People love to blame others for their choices.
So you are saying don't trust anyone until they prove they aren't manipulative arseholes then?
Er, no. That's not what I'm saying.
But if I keep picking manipulative arseholes, then apparently (according to your post above) it's my fault for picking them each time."
Then you need to reassess your selection process. There is something about the way you come across that attracts these kind of men to you, and you keep picking them.
Until you accept this, analyse it, and change whatever it is you're doing wrong then you'll keep getting them. "If you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting." |
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"I’ve messed your message up ha ha xx
and look at the women who copied that ladies comment. one of them had issues with a man only recently and broadcast it to the world so it all comes back to your poor choices.
no one likes hearing the truth but something is wrong with you if you keep making the same mistakes over and over.
its all in your favour ladies to pick the right guys. you have loads to pick from here.
ive no sympathy for you.sorry
Charming viewpoint.
A valid one all the same. Whenever I hear some woman saying all men are bastards, or some bloke saying all women are bitches, I point out it's only the ones they choose. People love to blame others for their choices.
So you are saying don't trust anyone until they prove they aren't manipulative arseholes then?
Er, no. That's not what I'm saying.
But if I keep picking manipulative arseholes, then apparently (according to your post above) it's my fault for picking them each time.
Then you need to reassess your selection process. There is something about the way you come across that attracts these kind of men to you, and you keep picking them.
Until you accept this, analyse it, and change whatever it is you're doing wrong then you'll keep getting them. "If you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting.""
Like I said before. Charming viewpoint. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's a lot harder to connect with someone when it's just text on a screen, it's all very sterile and you can't read warmth and context from it. Again a reason why I'm far more successful in real life than on here.
I disagree. I feel a lot of warmth from people I have never met."
is that because you're hot? |
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"I’ve messed your message up ha ha xx
and look at the women who copied that ladies comment. one of them had issues with a man only recently and broadcast it to the world so it all comes back to your poor choices.
no one likes hearing the truth but something is wrong with you if you keep making the same mistakes over and over.
its all in your favour ladies to pick the right guys. you have loads to pick from here.
ive no sympathy for you.sorry
Charming viewpoint.
A valid one all the same. Whenever I hear some woman saying all men are bastards, or some bloke saying all women are bitches, I point out it's only the ones they choose. People love to blame others for their choices.
So you are saying don't trust anyone until they prove they aren't manipulative arseholes then?
Er, no. That's not what I'm saying.
But if I keep picking manipulative arseholes, then apparently (according to your post above) it's my fault for picking them each time.
Then you need to reassess your selection process. There is something about the way you come across that attracts these kind of men to you, and you keep picking them.
Until you accept this, analyse it, and change whatever it is you're doing wrong then you'll keep getting them. "If you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting."
Like I said before. Charming viewpoint."
you're text book. Good luck in your quest. |
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"How often do you click with people in real life? I think it's just as difficult on here. "
Really. I click with people every day on different levels. No where the same. Face to face is so much easier to build up a rapport with someome. Here they have others doing the same as you. Trying to grab their attention. In real life you have their attention most of the time. |
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find.
The curse of all social media, sex site or not.
We can't interact with people face to face, and so we miss out on vital body language and facial expression which is why some people struggle to make a connection on all social media platforms. As we intend to replace their meanings of the message with our own emotional understanding of the written text. "
Spot on. Well done |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Click and chemistry are key obviously the physical attraction is first that you notice about someone,I’ve been lucky to meet some nice people and had a great laugh and I’m easy to get along with so that might help |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find. "
it could take years before every really chat to women or meet here |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Its because the mutual result is sex. Get that first fuck out of the way and have a laugh and a chat afterwards, maybe a cuddle if you're into it....just before round two. No chemistry, don't meet again. Meet somewhere public though, to be safe.
If there's no chemistry why would you want to have sex in the first place?"
Yes this... which is why I was originaly saying its so hard to find someone I have chemistry with that leads to a meet. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I know why we are all here but why is it so hard to click with a person you are talking to?
I don't just want sex with everybody and anybody there needs to be some kind of chemistry, but why is it so hard to find.
You have only been here a few weeks, it takes time and effort to find what you are looking for. Fancy a fuck while you are waiting "
was on here for a year last time I was on the site. |
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Exactly this! We’ve been lucky and have met a couple of couples that is going well but considering the amount of accounts on here it seems to be an awful ratio. We’re close to just using this as a way to stay in touch with people we meet at a club and leave it at that.
xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's always more difficult online to click with people but that's just because as humans we are naturally social creatures...and i believe it's always better and easier to get to know people away from cyber world...also you notice physical traits about them like expressions, quirkiness etc...and they character will always stand out more in person than online. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's always more difficult online to click with people but that's just because as humans we are naturally social creatures...and i believe it's always better and easier to get to know people away from cyber world...also you notice physical traits about them like expressions, quirkiness etc...and they character will always stand out more in person than online."
Yeah I completely agree with this, just wish I had enough of a social life to meet you all! |
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"I've had patience for over a year on this site! Few read a message never mind anything else. Given up really!"
Don't mate. I'll be honest if i didn't go to clubs,parties then i would have left by now. You have to use all tools at your disposal . There's too many of us men and even the good ones get left out at times. You're welcome to attend a club with me and Lexi anytime |
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"Its because the mutual result is sex. Get that first fuck out of the way and have a laugh and a chat afterwards, maybe a cuddle if you're into it....just before round two. No chemistry, don't meet again. Meet somewhere public though, to be safe.
If there's no chemistry why would you want to have sex in the first place?
Yes this... which is why I was originaly saying its so hard to find someone I have chemistry with that leads to a meet. "
Because some just want sex. That's it  |
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"It's always more difficult online to click with people but that's just because as humans we are naturally social creatures...and i believe it's always better and easier to get to know people away from cyber world...also you notice physical traits about them like expressions, quirkiness etc...and they character will always stand out more in person than online.
Yeah I completely agree with this, just wish I had enough of a social life to meet you all! "
A club once a month would suffice i'd say? |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
"It's always more difficult online to click with people but that's just because as humans we are naturally social creatures...and i believe it's always better and easier to get to know people away from cyber world...also you notice physical traits about them like expressions, quirkiness etc...and they character will always stand out more in person than online.
Yeah I completely agree with this, just wish I had enough of a social life to meet you all!
A club once a month would suffice i'd say? "
I try to go to a club a couple of times a month -4 at the most. That means I enjoy the experience and still get to meet new people |
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