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What is a girl to do?
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By *unaBelle OP Woman
over a year ago
Near the big road |
Can I seek advice here? I don't want to text my girls have them say ',I told you so
The thing is there is this guy and I really like him. He says I am special and I drop things for him all of the time.
I have the day off tomorrow and he had been hinting at spending it with me, then he says he made plans to meet the lads....he hasn't told the lads yet because one of the other girls told me her chap hadn't mentioned him being out with them
Is he playing me for a fool?
Some days he treats me like we might be going somewhere, I've told him I'm into him...
Other days I feel like I am last on his mind.
Should I bow out graciously?
Sorry for the whimpering girl things.   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If he wanted to spend time with you he would.
Sounds like he's taking the piss or doesn't know what he wants. Either way you're worth more than that. Believe me. xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Get rid of him. By the fact you've made this post tells me that you aren't happy with him. You're doubting him and feel like he isn't putting you first.
You're worth more. Don't be a fool. |
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By *rsSBWoman
over a year ago
toy town |
"How long have you been seeing him?
Casually for about 3 months.
He doesn't have much free time
I feel bad for expecting him to spend it with me. "
You are clearly in love with him. Does he feel the same way? Is he with someone else?
I don't expect you to answer me but those maybe some of the questions you may want to ask yourself.
All the best  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How long have you been seeing him?
Casually for about 3 months.
He doesn't have much free time
I feel bad for expecting him to spend it with me.
You are clearly in love with him. Does he feel the same way? Is he with someone else?
I don't expect you to answer me but those maybe some of the questions you may want to ask yourself.
All the best "
In love after 3 months? It'll be lust |
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By *unaBelle OP Woman
over a year ago
Near the big road |
"How long have you been seeing him?
Casually for about 3 months.
He doesn't have much free time
I feel bad for expecting him to spend it with me.
You are clearly in love with him. Does he feel the same way? Is he with someone else?
I don't expect you to answer me but those maybe some of the questions you may want to ask yourself.
All the best "
I don't think I love him. I just like him a lot and want to see him, but it is always on his terms.
He says I am special, but I don't feel it, not all of the time.
The ladies above are making sense, I do deserve better. |
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By *rsSBWoman
over a year ago
toy town |
"How long have you been seeing him?
Casually for about 3 months.
He doesn't have much free time
I feel bad for expecting him to spend it with me.
You are clearly in love with him. Does he feel the same way? Is he with someone else?
I don't expect you to answer me but those maybe some of the questions you may want to ask yourself.
All the best
I don't think I love him. I just like him a lot and want to see him, but it is always on his terms.
He says I am special, but I don't feel it, not all of the time.
The ladies above are making sense, I do deserve better. "
If you are not getting what you want from the relationship, you might want to step away from it. You don't owe him anything |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How long have you been seeing him?
Casually for about 3 months.
He doesn't have much free time
I feel bad for expecting him to spend it with me.
You are clearly in love with him. Does he feel the same way? Is he with someone else?
I don't expect you to answer me but those maybe some of the questions you may want to ask yourself.
All the best
I don't think I love him. I just like him a lot and want to see him, but it is always on his terms.
He says I am special, but I don't feel it, not all of the time.
The ladies above are making sense, I do deserve better. "
If it's always on his terms then definitely fuck him right off. He's treating you like a doormat  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you met him on here I think you know he's playing you... It's bad enough when you meet them the vanilla way!
No not here. Tindr "
Ahh,same thing really then  |
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Perhaps you should cool it off, just in case.
You have some feelings for him, by the sounds of it he seems just there when it suits him for convenient sex.
Your call but I can see someone getting their feelings hurt and I'm not sure it will be him.. |
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Play him at his own game, if he doesn't think enough of you to commit to some quality time together, then put yourself first. If he sorts his shit out and starts behaving, then that's good, if he doesn't, well, plenty more fish in the sea lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you like him and enjoy spending time with him then do so but don't change your plans to suit him. If he asks when your free tell him and if he wants to do something with you fine but if something comes up that you want to do then do it...don't Just wait for him. If he then says you said you were free just say sorry we hadn't actually made plans. Spend time with him if you enjoy that but don't make him to high up in your list of priorities x |
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"I don't think I love him. I just like him a lot and want to see him, but it is always on his terms.
He says I am special, but I don't feel it, not all of the time."
How special does he make you feel? You say that you don't think that you love him.
Well for a woman of your age, surely you must have some kind of knowledge about what you feel about someone that would play you as his second fiddle. Surely you must know by now Missus. |
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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago
Hull |
"Play him at his own game, if he doesn't think enough of you to commit to some quality time together, then put yourself first. If he sorts his shit out and starts behaving, then that's good, if he doesn't, well, plenty more fish in the sea lol."
This is what I was going to say. It sounds like he’s breadcrumbing tbh. See how it works when the boots on the other foot |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Perhaps you should cool it off, just in case.
You have some feelings for him, by the sounds of it he seems just there when it suits him for convenient sex.
Your call but I can see someone getting their feelings hurt and I'm not sure it will be him.. "
Perfectly put  |
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By *unaBelle OP Woman
over a year ago
Near the big road |
Ok. thankyou
I'll not be chasing him.
Acewinger you are very correct.
I should know, and at times I think I am special but the words and actions don't always add up.
That confuses me. I won't let it anymore. |
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"Can I seek advice here? I don't want to text my girls have them say ',I told you so
The thing is there is this guy and I really like him. He says I am special and I drop things for him all of the time.
I have the day off tomorrow and he had been hinting at spending it with me, then he says he made plans to meet the lads....he hasn't told the lads yet because one of the other girls told me her chap hadn't mentioned him being out with them
Is he playing me for a fool?
Some days he treats me like we might be going somewhere, I've told him I'm into him...
Other days I feel like I am last on his mind.
Should I bow out graciously?
Sorry for the whimpering girl things. "
It depends what you want from him - if it's a relationship, well the truth is in his actions, not his words. Is that good enough for you?
If it's just an fb - well carry on when it's mutually convenient but go find other people to play with as well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ok. thankyou
I'll not be chasing him.
Acewinger you are very correct.
I should know, and at times I think I am special but the words and actions don't always add up.
That confuses me. I won't let it anymore."
Just get on with your life chick and if he wants to play a part in it he will. Just back off a little and don't run after him and see what happens. Good luck x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You will get lots of advice and suggestions here, all coloured by the experience of others. Some may help some may not.
Only you can choose what to do next. Perhaps the question you should ask yourself is....does this make you happy.
Once you answer that then other desicions will fall in place. |
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"Ok. thankyou
I'll not be chasing him.
Acewinger you are very correct.
I should know, and at times I think I am special but the words and actions don't always add up.
That confuses me. I won't let it anymore."
It's only a matter of taking a step back and reevaluating things sometimes. I have come undone by rushing headlong into situations/relationships that I didn't fully appreciate or understand at the time. I hope not to repeat my earlier misgivings so that is probably why I am still single
Here's a track for you anyway that I do like, even though I'm a Rock&Blues man 
Come Undone - Duran Duran
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Epj84QVw2rc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ok. thankyou
I'll not be chasing him.
Acewinger you are very correct.
I should know, and at times I think I am special but the words and actions don't always add up.
That confuses me. I won't let it anymore."
I had someone do this to me. It fucks with your head. Get out while you can. It gets worse. He's making you feel bad already. You're just feeding his ego. |
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
Alarm bells are ringing, mates or a meet/shag?
Bros before ho's, was a patronising statement from a bloke who had relationship issues, i.e still a virgin!
There's better blokes there!
Two words. Bye bye. |
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You should judge him by his actions, which appear to differ from what he's saying at times.
It also seems you may be looking for different things from each other. I'd suggest you either need to stop chasing him and doing stuff on his terms or have an honest discussion with him |
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"Can I seek advice here? I don't want to text my girls have them say ',I told you so
The thing is there is this guy and I really like him. He says I am special and I drop things for him all of the time.
I have the day off tomorrow and he had been hinting at spending it with me, then he says he made plans to meet the lads....he hasn't told the lads yet because one of the other girls told me her chap hadn't mentioned him being out with them
Is he playing me for a fool?
Some days he treats me like we might be going somewhere, I've told him I'm into him...
Other days I feel like I am last on his mind.
Should I bow out graciously?
Sorry for the whimpering girl things. "
Are you together in a relationship capacity or just fuck now n then? |
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I've been thinking about this. If it's just casual then you can't really expect him to make you a priority even though you're prioritising him, though telling you how special you are then not making you a priority is a pretty wank thing to do if his time is limited I guess. It's giving you mixed signals which ain't fair.
He may just want to see how things go, let them flow and see where they end up. |
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Tell him straight it is pissing you off and you feel messed about.
Some guys are oblivious to the fact thatthe world doesn't revolve around them and so you gotta tell them to stick to plans made or don't make them if they can't. I had to tellmy partner to stop saying he had set off to meet me when he hadn't, i'd be waiting 2 hrs for him. This happened twice and then i told him i didn' want to be sat around waiting for no reason, he stopped doing it.
Sorry to say you have to train some men, not all men but the ones who need it usually are pretty compliant. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"I've been thinking about this. If it's just casual then you can't really expect him to make you a priority even though you're prioritising him, though telling you how special you are then not making you a priority is a pretty wank thing to do if his time is limited I guess. It's giving you mixed signals which ain't fair.
He may just want to see how things go, let them flow and see where they end up. "
Wise words
Regardless of the relationship type and make up OP if everything is on the other persons terms it always will be that way - so you need to decide whether you're happy with that, and of not make changes to either restore the balance or bring it to a halt |
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By *unaBelle OP Woman
over a year ago
Near the big road |
"Can I seek advice here? I don't want to text my girls have them say ',I told you so
The thing is there is this guy and I really like him. He says I am special and I drop things for him all of the time.
I have the day off tomorrow and he had been hinting at spending it with me, then he says he made plans to meet the lads....he hasn't told the lads yet because one of the other girls told me her chap hadn't mentioned him being out with them
Is he playing me for a fool?
Some days he treats me like we might be going somewhere, I've told him I'm into him...
Other days I feel like I am last on his mind.
Should I bow out graciously?
Sorry for the whimpering girl things.
Are you together in a relationship capacity or just fuck now n then? "
It's odd. He treats me like we are in a relationship with the way he behaves most of the time. |
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"I've been thinking about this. If it's just casual then you can't really expect him to make you a priority even though you're prioritising him, though telling you how special you are then not making you a priority is a pretty wank thing to do if his time is limited I guess. It's giving you mixed signals which ain't fair.
He may just want to see how things go, let them flow and see where they end up.
Wise words
Regardless of the relationship type and make up OP if everything is on the other persons terms it always will be that way - so you need to decide whether you're happy with that, and of not make changes to either restore the balance or bring it to a halt "
I guess if he doesn't have much free time due to circumstances beyond his control like looking after elderly parents/childcare/work etc you'll simply have to accept that things will be on his terms. I'd make sure there were clear lines of communication especially when it comes to the time you do have available so that you can make decisions together that suit you both. I think that's only fair. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been thinking about this. If it's just casual then you can't really expect him to make you a priority even though you're prioritising him, though telling you how special you are then not making you a priority is a pretty wank thing to do if his time is limited I guess. It's giving you mixed signals which ain't fair.
He may just want to see how things go, let them flow and see where they end up.
Wise words
Regardless of the relationship type and make up OP if everything is on the other persons terms it always will be that way - so you need to decide whether you're happy with that, and of not make changes to either restore the balance or bring it to a halt
I guess if he doesn't have much free time due to circumstances beyond his control like looking after elderly parents/childcare/work etc you'll simply have to accept that things will be on his terms. I'd make sure there were clear lines of communication especially when it comes to the time you do have available so that you can make decisions together that suit you both. I think that's only fair. "
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"Can I seek advice here? I don't want to text my girls have them say ',I told you so
The thing is there is this guy and I really like him. He says I am special and I drop things for him all of the time.
I have the day off tomorrow and he had been hinting at spending it with me, then he says he made plans to meet the lads....he hasn't told the lads yet because one of the other girls told me her chap hadn't mentioned him being out with them
Is he playing me for a fool?
Some days he treats me like we might be going somewhere, I've told him I'm into him...
Other days I feel like I am last on his mind.
Should I bow out graciously?
Sorry for the whimpering girl things.
Are you together in a relationship capacity or just fuck now n then?
It's odd. He treats me like we are in a relationship with the way he behaves most of the time. "
I think he's either testing the water to see if he thinks you 2 could make a go of things, or he's playing you like a puppet. It could be that you are special to him, but he's not realising his actions are affecting you. He could just be so used to doing his own thing that he's not taking you into consideration when making plans. A bit poo yes, but I'm sure everyone has made plans with people whether it be the lads, family, or even agreeing to work an extra shift when that time could have been spent with someone they care about (providing he does actually care)
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By *igertigerCouple (MM)
over a year ago
nr Letterkenny |
"Can I seek advice here? I don't want to text my girls have them say ',I told you so
The thing is there is this guy and I really like him. He says I am special and I drop things for him all of the time.
I have the day off tomorrow and he had been hinting at spending it with me, then he says he made plans to meet the lads....he hasn't told the lads yet because one of the other girls told me her chap hadn't mentioned him being out with them
Is he playing me for a fool?
Some days he treats me like we might be going somewhere, I've told him I'm into him...
Other days I feel like I am last on his mind.
Should I bow out graciously?
Sorry for the whimpering girl things. "
kick him in to touch before doing it play him at his own game!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Fuck him right off. Don't keep day s free just in case he might want to see you."
I've made the mistake of taking annual leave and getting constantly let down by someone on numerous occasions. Just don't do it.
People can be dicks - don't put yourself out. |
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"Can I seek advice here? I don't want to text my girls have them say ',I told you so
The thing is there is this guy and I really like him. He says I am special and I drop things for him all of the time.
I have the day off tomorrow and he had been hinting at spending it with me, then he says he made plans to meet the lads....he hasn't told the lads yet because one of the other girls told me her chap hadn't mentioned him being out with them
Is he playing me for a fool?
Some days he treats me like we might be going somewhere, I've told him I'm into him...
Other days I feel like I am last on his mind.
Should I bow out graciously?
Sorry for the whimpering girl things. "
Don't really know why you're asking.
The only sensible advi e is to get shot of the user immediately. He probably hasn't told the lads because they're an excuse and he's seeing another woman and hasn't thought to prepare them yet.
But like just about every other girl being used like this you'll carry on hanging around for him until he gets bored of you.
I have several friends doing the same, good looking girls letting guys treat them like shit. I get bored having the same conversation, which always ends the same, yes you're right, I'll get rid of him.
Then 2 days later, oh josh called round last night, we had great sex then he had to leave. Then it all starts again. Why the F*** do you do it to yourselves. |
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