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This is going to hurt me more than it will you
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When the ice cream van used to play music my mum told me that it meant he had run out of ice cream! "
I tell my daughter that now - doesn't work though
"It's black o'er Bills mothers |
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If you don't eat your crust your hair won't go curly. I didn't want curly hair. Still won't eat a crust.
Eat your carrots or you won't be able to see in the dark. Big news mum I was blind as a bat anyway  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Outside making brackets to hang my brothers canoes on the outside of the garage. Mum comes out with tea and biscuits. “ what are you doing?” Dad replies “ we are going to put our Colin’s canoes on these brackets as I want the space in the garage”. Mum replies” don’t be stupid David, they will get wet”. They are in their 70s now and we still laugh about that day. |
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"“I’ll give you a bloody good hiding.” My dad used to say to shut me up.
It never came. The threat was enough! "
Always is. Don't think I've ever needed to hit my kids but by fuck they got threaten with it enough |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My mum always used to say don't blow on a cockrel before sunrise
 I never did get what on earth she was on about
Are you sure she said 'cockerel'  "
I am beginning to wonder
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"Do you think money grows on trees?
Were you born in a barn
You'll never have curly hair if you don't eat your crusts
Your face will stay like that if the wind changes
Ask your dad"
When asking Dad, you got
Ask yer mum  |
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On reflection, the funniest thing my dear old Mum used to do in an attempt to keep the 4 yr old me under some kind of control was (around November / December) was to shout "FATHER CHRISTMAS, HE'S BEING NAUGHTY".
Wind the clock forwards 50 years or so, and last year, I saw a couple in a cafe in Dublin where theit child was playing up; the Mum got her mobile phone out and said; "Right, I'm phoning Santa". I was in fits of laughter, but it certainly worked with her unruly offspring. |
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