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Best tinder openers?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

What are or have been your most successful Tinder opening lines you have either used or heard? Looking for more comedy than anything that or you have a funny story to share? x

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By *exyman261Man  over a year ago

Banbury

Hi I'm a Nigerian Prince and I can make you rich beyond your wildest dreams. I just need your phone number.

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By *ineMan  over a year ago

In cave behind a waterfall on a hill


"Hi I'm a Nigerian Prince and I can make you rich beyond your wildest dreams. I just need your phone number."

And your account number sort code and password

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

for a minute i thought it said 'best tin openers'

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By *tirluvMan  over a year ago

the right frame of mind -London

Sorry, meant to swipe the other way, but I suppose you will do

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"for a minute i thought it said 'best tin openers'"

And me. Was interested too as all my tin openers are crap

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By *eorge n DragonCouple  over a year ago

Cheshire

Are you a loan, cause you gaining my interest

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By *lenderfoxMan  over a year ago

Leeds

Never get any matches so can't comment

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Fancy a fuck?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Genuine message I received on there once:

‘Book me an opticians appointment as I’ve just been blinded by your beauty!’

I thought it was hilarious

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By *unlinguyMan  over a year ago

South Dublin


"Genuine message I received on there once:

‘Book me an opticians appointment as I’ve just been blinded by your beauty!’

I thought it was hilarious "

Imagine what he would say if he seen this profile... fuck the glasses its a defib he would need lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Genuine message I received on there once:

‘Book me an opticians appointment as I’ve just been blinded by your beauty!’

I thought it was hilarious

Imagine what he would say if he seen this profile... fuck the glasses its a defib he would need lol"

Haha!!! That wouldn’t leave much to the imagination really.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"for a minute i thought it said 'best tin openers'

And me. Was interested too as all my tin openers are crap "

yeah them jml ones are rubbish

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By *itty9899Man  over a year ago

Craggy Island

This is the WINDOWS Technical department

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By *exyman261Man  over a year ago

Banbury

Titanic!

That's my ice breaker.

What's up?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Oi you, change that profile pic ya minger

Works every time

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By *easingTimMan  over a year ago

Loughlinstown

"Hi, I'm Fred Flintstone

How about we go back to your place...

and make the Bedrock!"

(Results may vary...!)

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I enjoy the guys who open saying:

Do you like anal?

I reply:

I do feel warm and fuzzies when I fuck him hard with my strapon and rupture his spleen and he cries like a baby. So yeah, I like it.

Wanna meet?

(It sorts the wheat from the chaff)

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By *agneto.Man  over a year ago

Bham


"for a minute i thought it said 'best tin openers'

And me. Was interested too as all my tin openers are crap "

Got mine from Amazon. It was either billed at the best tin opener ever or the comments said it, but I have to agree.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I enjoy the guys who open saying:

Do you like anal?

I reply:

I do feel warm and fuzzies when I fuck him hard with my strapon and rupture his spleen and he cries like a baby. So yeah, I like it.

Wanna meet?

(It sorts the wheat from the chaff)

"

. Ive had this, replied.... I love to kick open your ankles to get a good view before bringing Thor to the party - can you handle 12”? I have lube

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By *riefcase_WankerMan  over a year ago

Milton Keynes


"I enjoy the guys who open saying:

Do you like anal?

I reply:

I do feel warm and fuzzies when I fuck him hard with my strapon and rupture his spleen and he cries like a baby. So yeah, I like it.

Wanna meet?

(It sorts the wheat from the chaff)

"

It was sounding so promising up to the spleen-rupturing

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I enjoy the guys who open saying:

Do you like anal?

I reply:

I do feel warm and fuzzies when I fuck him hard with my strapon and rupture his spleen and he cries like a baby. So yeah, I like it.

Wanna meet?

(It sorts the wheat from the chaff)

So what if he says yes?

"

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By *ulfilthmentMan  over a year ago

Just around the corner


" Ive had this, replied.... I love to kick open your ankles to get a good view before bringing Thor to the party - can you handle 12”? I have lube "

Charming.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" Ive had this, replied.... I love to kick open your ankles to get a good view before bringing Thor to the party - can you handle 12”? I have lube

Charming."

A charmed question requires an equally well thought out response. he did ask

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By *hedark_knightMan  over a year ago

Edinburgh

“I was going to open up with a pickup line, but I thought I’d go with a cheesy line instead”

*insert a couple cheese emojis*

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