FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Worst case scenario...
Worst case scenario...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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You're single and you meet someone on Fab with whom you have amazing chemistry, they're a perfect match sexually, indeed it all feels perfect... At long last you've found "the one"!
But to them you're just another fuck in a long line of others to fuck 
Why would you put yourself through that? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For the chance to meet someone with whom you can really connect and have mind blowing sex too. Surely this more than makes up for the odd disappointment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Then they obviously aren't the one!! On a site like this I think you have to be careful about too attached to anyone and if you do then maybe think about leaving if the other person doesn't feel the same and youre finding it hard to deal with |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Then they obviously aren't the one!! On a site like this I think you have to be careful about too attached to anyone and if you do then maybe think about leaving if the other person doesn't feel the same and youre finding it hard to deal with "
getting*
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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But it could happen anywhere. Do you propose never getting close to anyone just in case?
At least on fab people are more likely to be honest about the fact they are only looking for sex. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"But it could happen anywhere. Do you propose never getting close to anyone just in case?
At least on fab people are more likely to be honest about the fact they are only looking for sex. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you are looking for 'the one', I would say this site shouldn't be your first choice. It is primarily a no strings sex site, so the risk of someone not wanting to meet you once only for sex is very likely. Many people on here have become couples, but did not set out to find 'the one'. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It can happen BUT...
If you're in any doubt they don't feel the same or you see by the fact they carry on seeing other people, then it's time to run away. Unless you are very naive (or masochistic) you'd hear the warning bells and look elsewhere.
Things like you describe just happen naturally between two people with both equally feeling similar things. You don't need to chase, you just 'get' eachother |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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The thing I like about the dating sites is that there's the sense that, if you meet someone special, you're going to give each other a chance. That's the context under which you agree to meet.
I can see why being on here wouldn't be such a big deal for couples or married "singles". I'm just wondering why a genuinely single person would put themselves through that.
I've only dated a little bit. But it's enough to sense that finding my soul mate might be a bit of a needle in a haystack. I'd be seriously bummed if I met her on here and, to her, I was just a notch on her bedpost. I'd almost rather not meet her than suffer that anguish |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The thing I like about the dating sites is that there's the sense that, if you meet someone special, you're going to give each other a chance. That's the context under which you agree to meet.
I can see why being on here wouldn't be such a big deal for couples or married "singles". I'm just wondering why a genuinely single person would put themselves through that.
I've only dated a little bit. But it's enough to sense that finding my soul mate might be a bit of a needle in a haystack. I'd be seriously bummed if I met her on here and, to her, I was just a notch on her bedpost. I'd almost rather not meet her than suffer that anguish "
Best not take the risk then OP? |
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"You're single and you meet someone on Fab with whom you have amazing chemistry, they're a perfect match sexually, indeed it all feels perfect... At long last you've found "the one"!
But to them you're just another fuck in a long line of others to fuck
Why would you put yourself through that? "
The same could happen in "real" life.
We make ourselves vulnerable when we love. If you don't want to risk that vulnerability don't open yourself up to the possibility of feelings.
If your feelings aren't reciprocated they aren't "the one" anyway. There are many "the ones" . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The thing I like about the dating sites is that there's the sense that, if you meet someone special, you're going to give each other a chance. That's the context under which you agree to meet.
I can see why being on here wouldn't be such a big deal for couples or married "singles". I'm just wondering why a genuinely single person would put themselves through that.
I've only dated a little bit. But it's enough to sense that finding my soul mate might be a bit of a needle in a haystack. I'd be seriously bummed if I met her on here and, to her, I was just a notch on her bedpost. I'd almost rather not meet her
than suffer that anguish "
Not sure why you are on here then ? That isn't me challenging you, I just don't get why you would be on here knowing there is a chance you may encounter what you fear ? |
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"The thing I like about the dating sites is that there's the sense that, if you meet someone special, you're going to give each other a chance. That's the context under which you agree to meet.
I can see why being on here wouldn't be such a big deal for couples or married "singles". I'm just wondering why a genuinely single person would put themselves through that.
I've only dated a little bit. But it's enough to sense that finding my soul mate might be a bit of a needle in a haystack. I'd be seriously bummed if I met her on here and, to her, I was just a notch on her bedpost. I'd almost rather not meet her than suffer that anguish "
What's your definition of a soul mate? Surely a soul mate would be as in to you as you were to them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You're single and you meet someone on Fab with whom you have amazing chemistry, they're a perfect match sexually, indeed it all feels perfect... At long last you've found "the one"!
But to them you're just another fuck in a long line of others to fuck
Why would you put yourself through that? "
it’s not a dating site thou |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You're single and you meet someone on Fab with whom you have amazing chemistry, they're a perfect match sexually, indeed it all feels perfect... At long last you've found "the one"!
But to them you're just another fuck in a long line of others to fuck
Why would you put yourself through that? "
desperation, sexually frustrated, intellectually drained, lonely, forlorn, unattractive, belligerent  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There seems to me to be alot of fabbers partaking in online dating also, so unless you tell them you may be interested in them on a romantic level then you will never know if they feel there is the same possibility for them. I don't think this is a terrible place to look for a partner, all depends what you are looking for eh? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you are looking for 'the one', I would say this site shouldn't be your first choice. It is primarily a no strings sex site, so the risk of someone not wanting to meet you once only for sex is very likely. Many people on here have become couples, but did not set out to find 'the one'. "
We’re one of them 
We get married 3 weeks today xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I was looking for a long term relationship, I wouldn't be looking on here at all. I think casual sex can muddle your feelings and sometimes people can connect sex with love. That can put you in a position where you're far more likely to get emotionally involved with someone, even when you don't plan to. I have found that unless you agree to being "exclusive" with someone on here, you will always get dropped like a hot potato when they find someone better, no matter how fantastic the chemistry. I think very few people on this site want a relationship Op, just nsa sex. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fabs no different to the real world. Some we meet. Some we may connect with on every level. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't.
We cannot change how others may feel or what they do.
If both want the same thing then we are lucky beyond words.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You're single and you meet someone on Fab with whom you have amazing chemistry, they're a perfect match sexually, indeed it all feels perfect... At long last you've found "the one"!
But to them you're just another fuck in a long line of others to fuck
Why would you put yourself through that? "
Why would you think this was anything other than a swingers site...
If you want to feel like that join pof |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You're single and you meet someone on Fab with whom you have amazing chemistry, they're a perfect match sexually, indeed it all feels perfect... At long last you've found "the one"!
But to them you're just another fuck in a long line of others to fuck
Why would you put yourself through that? "
Cos u cant hang your hat on sex alone if thats what you want needs to be more to it as tough as it can be nobody is immune unless there a sociopath |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The thing I like about the dating sites is that there's the sense that, if you meet someone special, you're going to give each other a chance. That's the context under which you agree to meet.
I can see why being on here wouldn't be such a big deal for couples or married "singles". I'm just wondering why a genuinely single person would put themselves through that.
I've only dated a little bit. But it's enough to sense that finding my soul mate might be a bit of a needle in a haystack. I'd be seriously bummed if I met her on here and, to her, I was just a notch on her bedpost. I'd almost rather not meet her than suffer that anguish
What's your definition of a soul mate? Surely a soul mate would be as in to you as you were to them."
Exactly my thoughts. If she was 'the one', she wouldn't be looking for others once she had found you. |
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If you are vulnerable to becoming attached, when your partners have clear boundaries that they are only meeting for sex, it's worth reassessing what you are after and whether fab and no strings sex is right for you atm. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You're single and you meet someone on Fab with whom you have amazing chemistry, they're a perfect match sexually, indeed it all feels perfect... At long last you've found "the one"!
But to them you're just another fuck in a long line of others to fuck
Why would you put yourself through that? "
I can totally relate to this, it’s usually why I end up hiding my profile because it all becomes a bit of a headfuck.
So the options are you declare your feelings, you never know, the other person could be doing the same because they’re unsure of how you feel..
Or you let go and move on. No easy answer sadly.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You're single and you meet someone on Fab with whom you have amazing chemistry, they're a perfect match sexually, indeed it all feels perfect... At long last you've found "the one"!
But to them you're just another fuck in a long line of others to fuck
Why would you put yourself through that? "
For sex? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Have done, didn't expect it in a zillion years from here, was allegedly reciprocated. Gutting for a time - still not back on the horse as twere. Live and learn live and learn |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"But it could happen anywhere. Do you propose never getting close to anyone just in case?
At least on fab people are more likely to be honest about the fact they are only looking for sex. "
Yes you're right Dotty As others have said, it could just as easily happen on a dating site or in real life. If she really was "the one" she'd think I was "the one" too. I certainly don't believe in withdrawing from life just in case I get a bit hurt. Wise words xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If I was looking for a long term relationship, I wouldn't be looking on here at all. I think casual sex can muddle your feelings and sometimes people can connect sex with love. That can put you in a position where you're far more likely to get emotionally involved with someone, even when you don't plan to. I have found that unless you agree to being "exclusive" with someone on here, you will always get dropped like a hot potato when they find someone better, no matter how fantastic the chemistry. I think very few people on this site want a relationship Op, just nsa sex. "
I guess I wasn't so much talking about seeking a relationship on here. More that I could imagine trawling through a long line of absolutely abysmal dates with disastrous chemistry on the dating sites... only to turn up to a gang bang on here and find the woman at the heart of it is so much easier to get on with and we click naturally... but I'm just man17 to her. Sod's law  |
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